If You Want To Raise A Good Sport, Don’t... Be two-faced. Showing one face in public and then talking smack about the coach or teammates at home is confusing to kids. So don’t do it. Hover. Your child is on the team; you are not. Sometime the coach needs you around but most of the time she does not. Parents play a supporting role and can ask for clarification as to what helpful looks like whenever unsure. Stroke your child’s ego. Let your child strengthen his own ego through participating fully. You don’t need to make a child feel superior to others. In fact, over-praising will undermine a player’s natural desire to progress. Grouse. Appreciating the coach, the administrators, and the teammates will lead to family optimism. Kvetching, complaining, and grumbling will only inspire cynicism. Choose wisely. Imagine your child is the only one who matters. How many members of the extended team are there? How many coaches? How many are there on the support staff? How many parent volunteers? Show appreciation and support for everyone involved. Nobody enjoys diva behavior. Merely focus on winning. Teams win some and lose some. Your child will have to learn to deal with emotions related to both extremes. Don’t be surprised if you are balancing cockiness as much as discouragement because kids may not have the ability to handle emotional highs and lows without guidance.
Overstay your child’s enthusiasm. When the thrill of being on the team is gone, it’s time to move on. Don’t make the mistake of staying on a team when your child is no longer feeling the love. But never leave in a huff or quit when things don’t go your way. Instead, leave graciously when it’s a natural time to choose differently.
12 AUGUST SUMMER2017 2017
Encouragements That Build Sportsmanship To your child:
To the team:
I am so proud of your efforts.
Way to come out strong!
I could tell you did your best.
Keep your chins up!
Thank you for being such a good sport.
You’ve got this!
You really came back strong.
Way to finish strong!
Your hard work is paying off.
Way to do your best!
Way to be a supportive teammate. You are growing so much; keep it up. Mantras to memorize: It’s not whether you win or lose; it’s knowing you did your best. You’ll win some and you’ll lose some, but always be a good sport. It’s easy to get swept up in the drama, so take a deep breath and just play. Acknowledge your mistakes without being hard on yourself. Be the first one to tell a teammate, “That’s okay. Shake it off.” Forget your mistakes, forget your record, and just have a good time out there. Celebrate everything you do well while working to improve any weaknesses. Teams are works in progress. They are never finished and they are never done. Enjoy being an enthusiastic member of the team; that’s where the memories are. What’s Going To Work? Teamwork! If your child wants to join any type of team, she is going to get a crash course in sportsmanship. Parents need to remember the games teams play are opportunities for members to grow. Most coaches know that developing skills and character are just as important as playing well. Unfortunately, team members sometimes bring negativity, distraction, and dissipation into a team. Never underestimate the static even one unhappy team member can create. Kids-and their parents-who consistently undermine team goals are considered poor sports. Families that care about the team, can all grow together. Families that don’t care to grow, should probably find other pursuits.