Brothers Bulletin Spring 2016 by Brothers Leagues Club Ipswich

SPRING 2016

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all about the MusiQue | PAGE 22

September 30

November 1

THE BEATLEGS TICKETS ON SALE NOW

MAGICAL MELBOURNE CUP LUNCHEON www.brothersipswich.com.au

RENEW, JOIN OR UPDATE AND GO INTO THE DRAW TO SHARE IN A

RENEW, JOIN OR UPDATE MAJOR PRIZE: $5,000 VOUCHER AT

CONSOLATION DRAWS: 10x $500 VOUCHERS AT

IPSWICH

HOW TO ENTER: Renew your membership, join as a new member, or (if your membership isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t due to expire) update your contact details including photo at reception and fill out an official entry form before 2pm on Saturday 8 October 2016. Staff-verified entries will be placed in the barrel. Maximum one entry per person. The draws will commence at 4pm on 8 October. You do not need to be present to win the Good Guys vouchers. All winners will be notified using supplied details and results will be displayed in the club and on brothersipswich.com.au.

Full terms and conditions available at reception.

PLUS ALL WINNERS PRESENT AT THE DRAW RECEIVE AN EXTRA $500 CASH!

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

YOU TOO CAN EXPERIENCE

JOIN TODAY FROM AS LITTLE AS $3.30 & INSTANTLY SAVE 10% OFF

all our standard prices on everything from coffee and cakes to entire meals and all your drinks. And it just gets better from there!

FEATURE: IT’S ALL ABOUT THE MUSIQUE

5 YEAR SOCIAL MEMBERSHIP ALSO AVAILABLE FOR $5 FUNCTIONS

IT REALLY IS THE HARDEST WORKING CARD IN TOWN. THAT’S THE BROTHERS ADVANTAGE

EASIER ACCESS FASTER REWARDS BIGGER DISCOUNTS

REFURBISHMENT

DIVA DEMOLITION

HANCOCKS

Contents General Business

October Entertainment

Around The Club with Graham Business as usual

Feature It’s all about the MusiQue 20

Refurbishment Latest News

November Entertainment

Behind the Bar with Hallsy What do the new laws mean? 10

In Focus Hancock Brothers Hockey Club

In the Kitchen with Chrissy Functions and Events 13

Kindred Clubs Contacts

Jokes for Frank

Brothers Notice Board

September Entertainment

Getting to Know Diva Demolition 16

YOUR BROTHERS MEMBERSHIP CARD

2016/2017 MEMBERSHIP

JOIN NOW

THE HARDESTD WORKING CAR IN TOWN! MEMBERSHIP Join today for as little as $3.30 and instantly experience the Brothers Advantage. Receive discounts on food and drinks, earn points you can spend and become eligible for our many promotions. It’s the hardest working card in town! Not only that, but you’ll become a part of the leading club in Ipswich, a club that has been supporting local sporting, community and charitable groups for over forty years. Welcome to Brothers.

PUBLICATION Brothers Bulletin is a quarterly publication for members and guests. All information was correct at time of printing. Editor: Anthony Watkins Design: Tandem E. Tandem Pty Ltd Advertising Enquiries: awatkins@brothersipswich.com.au

COVER MusiQue Sunday Session Photographer: David Buttner

BROTHERS LEAGUES CLUB IPSWICH ADDRESS Wildey Street, Raceview QLD 4305 POSTAL

PO BOX 680, Ipswich QLD 4305

PHONE

07 3817 2999

EMAIL info@brothersipswich.com.au

GENERAL BUSINESS Mark Hennelly | General Manager Welcome to the spring edition of the Brothers Bulletin. We are now only weeks away from commencing the most significant refurbishment ever in the Club’s history. I, for one, cannot wait. As we described in the last edition, this project has involved unprecedented research and consultation with members. The team that was set up by the Brothers Board to oversee the refurbishment has been working on it for the last two years. When complete, the result of all the hard work will enhance our reputation as the leading club in Ipswich and put us squarely amongst the leading clubs in Queensland. We hope you will share in the pride of this achievement as it is all because of you, our members. For this reason, and many more, there has never been a better time to be a member of Brothers Ipswich. Our annual renewal period is now well underway. If your membership was due to expire on 30 September, you should have received a letter from me to invite you to renew. I sincerely hope that you will. As an extra bonus, we’re giving everyone who does renew before 8 October (and those who simply update their contact details) a chance to share in more than $10,000 worth of prizes. There is more about that offer elsewhere in this edition. Spring also signals the end of the season for football and all the winter sports and the transition toward all the summer sports. This is a very busy time for many of our Kindred Clubs with season-ending celebrations for some teams and sign-on days for others. This leads me to welcome the newest member of our Kindred Clubs, the Nobby’s Beach Surf Life Saving Club. They were recently named the South Coast Branch Nipper Club of the Year and we’re very proud to have them on board with Brothers. You will, no doubt, hear more about them in future editions. Also fast approaching is our next Board election and our Annual General Meeting which is always held in late November. Keep an eye out for signage in the club in the coming weeks giving more details about how to nominate for a position on the Board and when exactly elections will take place. We are very fortunate to have such a dedicated and hardworking group of people serving on our Board now. But we welcome interest from any member who feels they can make a contribution. Even if you have no interest in serving on the Board yourself, I would like to urge all eligible members to take the time to vote in the upcoming elections. Thank you again for your continued support of Brothers. Enjoy reading and I look forward to seeing you at the Club. Cheers,

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

WI TH

LGE INDU

IE • ENJOY A FR ARB E S H EB FR TH U

E IR

ENJOY A DRINK

IR E FEED THE FAMIL • Y T • EA F TR

ND IE

Giving our members more chances to win Smore prizes more often! F

PRIZES EVERY DAY!

BIGGEST WEEKLY RAFFLE IN TOWN – EVERY WEDNESDAY NIGHT

10 GREAT PRIZES EVERY WEEKDAY – THE 11TH DRAW IS CASH!

! E E R F W O N S T E K ALL TIC

All draws will still be held regardless of results. Full terms and conditions available from reception.

AROUND THE CLUB WITH GRAHAM

Business as usual This edition comes to you on the eve of construction for the first stage of our much anticipated refurbishment. We are very excited by what is to come, but in the meantime it will be business as usual throughout this nine-month project. In fact, for the remainder of this calendar year, the majority of work is going to be outside our existing building perimeter and won’t affect inside the club at all.

Naturally, we’ll be keeping you updated with everything that is happening at your club. Projects like this don’t come around all that often and we understand it is always very interesting to observe progress. We want to share as much of that experience with you as we can. Just because we have a $13 million dollar refurb coming up doesn’t mean we’re sitting on our hands. Since the last edition, we’ve added some new furniture and a bit of colour to our Tryline Restaurant to make it a bit more comfortable while we wait for the permanent upgrade. Also, following the rebranding to UBET, we’ve given our old TAB area a complete makeover. In addition to updating the look and feel we’ve added a new 65 inch screen so now even I can see all the live action. The process of updating our gaming floor remains ongoing too. Recent editions include a number of Konami Concertos featuring dual 27 inch screens and we’ve brought in some of the Scientific Gaming Dualos machines that are from the same family as the Lock It link. Expect to see more Lock It games on the floor by mid-September. Then, not too far away we’ll be bringing you the brand new Dragon Link which is the latest product by Aristrocrat and is based on their very popular Lightning Link series. So keep an eye out for that one sometime before Christmas. If you’re just looking to fill a bit of time with your friends while you are here, we now have board games available for you to borrow at the Coffee Shop. There’s no charge. We just ask that you return them

in the same condition you borrowed them. As always, we still have the best mix of free live entertainment each week too and you can find a full listing on later pages. But I also wanted to draw your attention to some of the exciting feature shows and events we have coming up. The Beatlegs will be here on Friday 30 September. The ultimate Beatles tribute delivers a 2 hour live show of Beatles magic, reproducing the iconic sound and look of the Fab Four with multiple costume changes, superb harmonies and unforgettable music. The Beatlegs will have you dancing in the aisles and reminiscing as they play hit after hit of those memorable Beatles classics. So come together and celebrate the greatest rock phenomenon the world has ever seen. You can buy tickets at reception now for just $20 or you can get them online from outix.net and pay only $15. If you’re having trouble finding it, the link is available on our website. On Saturday 8 October, we’re bringing you Australia’s most popular Theatre Restaurant. Dirty Dick’s is coming to Brothers to present their distinctive night of medieval old English fun and feasting. It’s a unique entertainment and dining concept set in a totally themed environment with a highly comical stage show, magnificent 3 course banquet and costumed serving staff, providing non-stop interactive fun in true olden day tradition. Sing-a-long, clap-a-long and laugh-a-long as you experience the hilarious antics, madcap merrymaking and funtastic festivities of this unforgettable night. Tickets for this one

are just $55 at reception or again, book online and pay only $50. Our Melbourne Cup Luncheon will be magical this year. Hosted by our resident illusionist Josh Norbido, musical entertainment will be provided by the delightful Tamara O’Callaghan. For only $45, members will receive a free glass of bubbly on arrival before being treated to a delicious two-course meal followed by a chef’s selection of petite desserts. There will be all the usual fun and games with prizes for best dressed, best hat, and lucky door and we’ll be running a Calcutta and various sweeps. Josh will make sure it’s one to remember, even if you have no idea how he did it. As I’m sure most of you realise, we are now well into our renewals period with membership for many of you expiring on 30 September. We really hope you will continue to support the club at this exciting time. As an extra incentive, this year we’re giving you the chance to share in a $10,000 Good Guys Shopping Spree. Entry is free when you renew, join as a new member or simply update your contact details before 8 October. The major prize is a $5,000 Good Guys voucher and there are ten consolation prizes worth $500 each. You don’t even have to be at the draw to win. But if you are here at the time, we’ll throw in an extra $500 in cash for each winner. Imagine what you could get with all that! Further details, including full terms and conditions are available from reception. Continue to experience the Brothers Advantage and I look forward to seeing you around the club.

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

Refurbishment: Latest News In the winter edition of the Brothers Bulletin we detailed plans for our long-awaited $13 million dollar stage one refurbishment of the club. After more than two years of research, consultation and planning, the nine month project is expected to commence in October or November and has been described as the most significant capital works project the club has ever undertaken.

STAGE 1 COMPLETION EXPECTED MIDDLE OF 2017

in our region will match “theNothing quality and level of finishes. | GREG, CHAIR OF THE BOARD

It has been a decade since we have been involved in anything even remotely comparable. The 2006 project was primarily about increasing floor space. This time around, while some further expansion is involved, there will be a far greater emphasis on interiors in terms of both function and design. The result will be a venue unlike any other in the region with facilities provided for Brothers members being on par with any club in Queensland. The Chair of the Brothers Leagues Club Board, Greg Walsh says that since the last Bulletin was published, the Board has continued working with specialist consultants, management and staff in reviewing the operational effects of the proposed development. They identified a few potential issues in certain areas which resulted in some modifications to the layout of the floor plan. It has been an ongoing process as each change then has to be considered for its impact on other areas. “Continued review and scrutiny of our plans ensure that we will offer our members a very well designed and thought out venue,” he says. “These changes are going to either offer better capability to service our members and/or our members will be more comfortable as a result. This is certainly a normal part of the process of ensuring that we get it right. Further changes are still possible, but we believe that we now have the majority of the design very close to being right.” The adjustments to the proposed building works have made it necessary to review the financial impact on the budget. But Greg says the total project cost remains unaltered at $13 million with various additions and subtractions effectively cancelling each other out. A team from project partners, Brand + Slater presented revised plans and interior design samples to the Board and senior management in early August.

While such level of detail remains conceptual at this point, Greg reasserted his confidence in the quality of what is being proposed for the members of Brothers. “Certainly nothing in our region will match the quality and level of finishes offered in this refurbishment and expansion to our Club,” he says. At the time of preparing this article (late August) the Development Application was still being reviewed by the Ipswich City Council. However, according to Greg, the length of time it has taken so far is not unusual for a project of this size and the timelines described in the winter edition are unaffected. “At this stage the project remains on schedule for an October/ November commencement,” he says. Before that can occur, necessary approvals still need to be finalised and a builder selected. Greg remains confident this can be done within the planned timeframe. He also stresses that once construction commences, the disruption to members will be minimal with all facilities remaining open. This has been a priority consideration throughout the planning process. As significant as it is, the refurbishment project is only a part of the Board’s recently reviewed and updated strategic plan for the club’s future. Greg says such planning ensures that the short, medium and long term future of our Club is always being considered and that our management team are focused on the direction and goals of the Board. He is very optimistic about what is still to come for Brothers. “We are very excited about the future of our Club and what our Board and Management will be offering to our members and guests when this development is completed.” Stage one is expected to be complete in the middle of 2017.

3D Renders: Brand + Slater | Photography: Rocktography

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

BEHIND THE BAR WITH HALLSY

What do the new laws mean? In February this year the state government passed the Tackling Alcohol-Fuelled Violence Legislation Amendment Bill 2015 which received Royal Assent by the Governor in March and became the Tackling Alcohol-Fuelled Violence Legislation Amendment Act 2016. The result being some changes to the Liquor Act 1992 – which basically sets out what we can and cannot do with alcohol.

Some of those changes came into effect immediately, some kicked in on 1 July and some are still yet to come. The whole thing is a bit complicated and makes for a very dry read, so I thought I’d have a crack at explaining what it means for us here at Brothers. And the short version is – not much. The first thing to understand is all of this was done with the intention of reducing alcohol-fuelled violence. I’m pretty sure we all reckon that’s a good idea. But I guess what upsets a few

people is they’ve basically let some nongs in certain areas stuff things up for the rest of us who just want a quite drink with some mates. Now we all have to make adjustments because some operators can’t be trusted to sort themselves out.

responsibilities seriously and we do what we can to reduce risks. That said, every so often a clown will stick their head up to cause a ruckus and unfortunately ruin everyone’s night. We take a very dim view of such people.

Here at Brothers, while we do have the odd incident from time to time, major problems are pretty rare. This would have to be one of the safest joints around for enjoying a quiet bevvy or two. That’s because we take our

Much of the new laws relate to behind the scenes compliance issues and won’t really make any noticeable difference to members here. It goes on for pages and pages and pages. Crikey it’s boring.

A R O F D C R A F T E M O OT H E R S , R E L L U F . R U O V A FL AVA IL A BLE HERE

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

FROM 1 JULY 2016

AFTER MIDNIGHT IN QUEENSLAND VENUES NO SALE OF SHOOTERS, SHOTS, BOMBS, BLASTERS or any drink designed for rapid consumption or drinks containing more than 45ml of alcohol. EXAMPLES

TEQUILA SHOT

JELLY SHOT

JAGERBOMB

YES TO SALE OF UP TO 45ML OF A SPIRIT OR LIQUEUR in a tall glass with, or without, a mixer. EXAMPLES WHISKY ON ICE

SCOTCH NEAT

SAMBUCA ON ICE

GIN AND TONIC

RUM AND COLA

VODKA, LIME AND SODA

COWBOY

NO PRE-MIXED ALCOHOLIC DRINKS OVER 5% or containing more ethanol than 2 standard drinks.

YES TO SALE OF WINE, BEER AND CIDER

EXAMPLES PRE-MIXED 5%

PRE-MIXED 5.1%

AND 2.0 STANDARD DRINKS

OR 2.1 STANDARD DRINKS

OR BELOW

OR ABOVE

YES TO SALE OF COCKTAILS if listed on menu with set price.

ME COCK NU TAIL

COCK TAIL MENU

Mojito ..... ... .. $ . 14 Pina Co lada . $ . 16 Daiqui ri. . . . . . . $ . . 13 Martin i. . . . . . . . $ . . 16 Marga rita. . . . $ . . 15

0757LG_0616

There are separate rules for what they ironically call ‘safe night precincts’ which sound to me like where all the problems originate and for the big end of town, like the casinos. But we aren’t in a safe night precinct and don’t see too many millionaires here so those exemptions don’t apply to us. The main changes you might have heard about that will impact us relate to takeaways and new rules that kick in after midnight. The takeaway rules mostly affect newcomers to the industry and certain types of licenses that don’t apply here. The bottom line for us is now anyone who is allowed to be in the club legitimately – that is members, their guests or visitors who live at least 15km away and who have been properly signed in – are entitled to purchase alcohol at our bottle shop. That wasn’t always the case so that’s a pretty sensible change. But if people are here specifically to attend a function, they still can’t buy takeaways unless they also satisfy the other requirements. No new licenses will allow bottle shops to operate after 10pm (a lot around here shut much earlier) but our license allows us to sell takeaways until midnight – seven days a week. I know myself how frustrating it is when all the places near where I live are shut early, so keep that in mind

if you’re having a quiet one at home. Plus we have a great range anyway and frequently offer pretty good specials through our alliance with Club Partners. The key changes after midnight relate to opening hours and what they call the rapid consumption of alcohol. A lot of places had to reduce their opening hours as a result of the new rules. We weren’t affected because we already stopped serving alcohol at 2am and allowed a 30 minute period for you to finish drinks (which is what the new laws enforce). So you won’t see a change there. But we did have to make a few minor tweaks following the new rapid consumption rules. Essentially, they’ve put stricter limits on what you can buy after midnight. Shooters are out. So are pre-mixed drinks with an alcohol content greater than 5% or two standard drinks. We had a couple of products that just fell on the wrong side of the line for this one so we’ve had to stop selling them at midnight. But it’s kind of a subjective rule because you can still have up to 45ml of straight spirits provided it is served in a tall glass and sipped rather than ‘shot’. And you can have bottles of wine, beer or cider with an alcohol content greater than 5% as long as it was brewed or fermented as opposed

to prepared by a manufacturer. You can even have cocktails provided they are listed on a menu that is displayed and available prior to midnight. Anyway, as I said, we were already running a pretty tight operation in relation to responsible service of alcohol at Brothers. So the changes here are going to be very minimal. Our focus has always been on providing a safe and enjoyable venue for our members and that will continue to be the case.

Cheers!

BROTHERS BOTTLE SHOP

OPEN UNTIL MIDNIGHT 7 DAYS

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

BROTHERS HAS SOMETHING TO SATISFY EVERY CRAVING & DINING OCCASION

COFFEE SHOP Great value meals for the whole family LUNCH & DINNER 7 DAYS 12

For a quick bite or well earned treat OPEN ALL DAY 7 DAYS SUNDAY BREAKFAST FROM 9AM

For something a little more special DINNER: THURS - SUN

FOR BOOKINGS AND ENQUIRIES PLEASE CALL RECEPTION ON 3817 2999

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

IN THE KITCHEN WITH CHRISSIE

Functions and Events What can we do with a blank canvas? Just about anything. You probably already know that at Brothers Ipswich we have a dedicated function room located upstairs when you first enter the club. Fully self-contained with its own audio-visual setup, bar, kitchenette and bathroom facilities, it’s regularly used for weddings, dinners, conferences and most of our larger shows. With a bit of imagination, it can be transformed into just about anything. But did you realise we have lots of other options available for functions and events? We can cater for pretty much any occasion and make it as simple or elaborate as you like. In addition to the function room, we often make use of other spaces in the building such as the Tryline Restaurant, sections of the Sports Bar and O Bar Lounges and even the deck outside the Brasserie. Corporate events are also catered for and we often have businesses in to do training, presentations and sometimes to reward their team with a bit of a party.

Depending on your specific requirements, there’s a good chance we have a solution. And if it turns out there is something you need that we don’t have here, we can always hire it in for you from our extensive list of contacts. The main thing is, you don’t have to worry about it.

“I had my wedding on the 4th of June and can’t thank Brett and the staff enough. Everything was perfect and everything I ever wished for“ – Shelbie

As far as catering goes, you are only limited by your imagination. We offer a series of set menus from hot and cold cocktail food, to a variety of buffets, to alternate drop meals. But if there’s something specific you want - just let us know and we will put together a menu just for you. I personally love the chance to break out of routine every now and then with a few dishes that I wouldn’t usually get to prepare too often.

“Thank you to Brett and his staff, for the fantastic work you all do. Brett had everything looking perfect and was very happy to help out with every crazy idea. Brett, the little things that you do makes the difference, thank you for fussing over my 85 year old mum. Hats off to you all” – Dora

Our functions team is led by the hardest working functions coordinator on the planet. Brett Mackay is regularly singled out for his hard work and dedication to making your special event magical.

Here a a few recent messages we have received;

“I would like to thank Brett and team for doing such a lovely job in organising my twin sons’ 21st party. I can’t thank you enough and thanks to everyone at Brothers for being so friendly and helpful. It meant so much to me xxoo” – Gaylene

Brett and his team are in high demand. But if you have an important celebration coming up or need space for pretty much any personal or corporate event, it is well worth giving him a call or flicking an email to functions@brothersipswich.com.au to see what he can do for you.

Bon Appetit!

Function Venue Specialist Our functions team are award winning professionals that will arrange for your special day to be one that you will never forget. Specialising in small and medium sized functions, Brothers Ipswich can offer a variety of catering packages and room options easily configured to your requirements. From the Tryline Restaurant overlooking the playing fields to the

dedicated upstairs function room, we have the solution for all types of formal, corporate and social events. To learn how we can help with your next function, contact our Functions Coordinator on 3817 2999 or email functions@brothersipswich.com.au

AWARD WINNING VENUE

September

ENTERTAINMENT

THURSDAYS

FRIDAYS

11:00AM-2:00PM

SOLOISTS & DUOS EASY LISTENING

PARTY PUB ROCK

CLUB STYLE VARIETY

50’S & 60’S ROCK ‘N’ ROLL

SATURDAYS

8:00PM-11:00PM

01 Sept Baby Boomer Party Band

02 Sept Ear Candy

03 Sept Route 66

08 Sept Rob Rosenlund & Tony Jeffrey

09 Sept 60s Sensation Show Band

10 Sept Buddy Love and the Tremors

15 Sept Matti Biskit

16 Sept Sekada Band

17 Sept Indecision

22 Sept Glenn Callaghan

23 Sept Zed 28

29 Sept Kevin Smith

30 Sept Able Magwitch

O BAR

FRIDAYS

SATURDAYS

SUNDAYS

9:30PM-1:30AM

24 Sept Kaffene

9:30PM-1:30AM

2:00PM-6:00PM

02 Sept Men Behaving Loudly

03 Sept BrisVegas

04 Sept The Rock Hounds

09 Sept Paradigm

10 Sept Half Monte

11 Sept Wally & The Gators

16 Sept Rush Hour

17 Sept Dirty Dice

18 Sept Hot Wire

23 Sept Sarenda

24 Sept Diva Demolition

25 Sept Black Cats Re-Loaded

SPORTS BAR

O BAR

30 Sept Bootleg Flyers

SPORTS BAR

Entertainment subject to change on short notice. Check website for latest.

O BAR

-2

Transition

P 6 • 10A M

EVERY SUNDAY

EVERYONE WELCOME - FROM 7PM

MusiQue

SEN I

ON SI

S SES OR

Open Sunday Sessions

JOIN IN OR JUST DROP BY AND ENJOY

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

THE

THE ULTIMATE BEATLES TRIBUTE

FRIDAY 30 SEPTEMBER

SHOW 7:30PM DOORS 7PM

The ultimate Beatles tribute delivers an unforgettable 2 hour live show of Beatles magic. Reproducing the iconic sound and look of the Fab Four with multiple costume changes, superb harmonies and music. The Beatlegs will have you dancing in the aisles and reminiscing as they play hit after hit of those memorable Beatles classics. So come together and celebrate the greatest rock phenomenon the world has ever seen.

TICKETS $20 FROM RECEPTION OR $15 ONLINE AT OUTIX.NET

BOOK NOW

Father’s day

SUNDAY 4th SEPTEMBER

We’ll help you look after Dad with a range of breakfast, lunch or dinner options available. FOR DETAILS - PH 3817 2999

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

GETTING TO KNOW

Diva Demolition We get a lot of seriously talented artists who regularly play here at Brothers. But few bring as much rock cred to the show as Kylie (vocals/bass) and Sherree (guitar) from Diva Demolition

In fact, it was Doc Neeson who took an interest in the band that led to them being signed up to his record label and the release of their debut album Like It Too Much in 2013.

Diva Demolition emerged from the ashes of all-girl punk rockers Legless who formed in Adelaide in 2005. Legless released two full length albums and performed gigs overseas before Kylie and Sherree relocated to Brisbane in 2010. At first, the duo tried to keep the band going with various local drummers and released a third album “Diva Demolition” under that name. But according to Kylie, after numerous line-up changes, Legless had run its natural course. When the record company suggested a new direction, the Divas were on board.

And while that was their first album as Diva Demolition, the story of Kylie and Sherree goes back much further.

“The members who were really punk and hardcore were no longer in the band and what was left was a surf-rock chick

After forming in mid 2012, the Divas have already successfully played support slots for international superstars Aerosmith, KISS, Thin Lizzy and Motley Crüe as well as some of Australia’s biggest rock acts including James Reyne, Joe Camelliri, Jon Stevens, The Radiators, Mental as Anything and Doc Neeson.

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

“Inspired by bands such as Divinyls, AC/DC and Led Zeppelin, Diva Demolition now play a mix of both originals and covers in the truest pub rock tradition. and a rock girl and we struggled to maintain that punk ethos. So it was good to evolve into Diva Demolition, it suits us a lot better.” Inspired by bands such as Divinyls, AC/DC and Led Zeppelin, Diva Demolition now play a mix of both originals and covers in the truest pub rock tradition. Kylie says it was actually through doing Defence tours that they got back into playing covers so the troops could enjoy the music they recognised. As both Legless and Diva Demolition they have played in Timor, Afghanistan, Kuwait, the Solomon Islands and the Sinai Peninsula in Egypt. “Like 20Ks out of Gaza!” remembers Sherree. “That was something else.” In the ten years since their first Defence tour they’ve noticed the younger troops are more into the original songs than the older-school covers. “So there’s been a bit of a changing of the guard and we’ve been more focussing on our original stuff,” says Kylie. Diva Demolition say it’s an honour for them to be invited onto a Defence tour and are grateful for the opportunity to see places they would otherwise never get to visit. “We’re very proud and very privileged to have a little glimpse of what happens and we’re always so grateful to come back to Australia. We come back thinking how awesome our country is,” says Kylie. “You have this idea of what the army does but then you go on these tours and you realise there’s so much more to it. It’s a very complex and massive beast. There’s a lot of humanitarian stuff.” Diva Demolition are currently putting the finishing touches on their second album

which is due for release next year. It was written in 2015 while travelling around Europe. According to Kylie, they needed to get away because they felt like they were getting a bit stale and were going through a period of writer’s block. So when a friend invited them to stay with him in his home town in Croatia, they packed their bags. “We met some really nice people,” recalls Sherree. “It’s funny, you know, you walk in and all the heads turn around to look at the new people and then as soon as we start talking then it’s like ‘oh, you’re Australian!’ and then everyone tries to work out who’s the best English speaker to come and talk to us. Then you’ve got friends everywhere!” Kylie says while they found Croatia to be very much about cover bands, a bit further up the road in Serbia, their original material was more popular. They returned to Serbia several times and were invited to play at the 49th Gitarijada in Zajecar, a huge annual festival that attracts tens of thousands of people. However, they found other aspects of their European sojourn to be more confronting. “It was a real journey in the reality of what Europe is because at the same time we were moving in the same pathways of lots of migrants that were coming,” remembers Kylie. “And we were going through the same borders and it was when all the razor wire was coming out and it was quite a controversial time.” Sherree says as a result of their experiences, the new album will probably be a bit of a departure from what some of their fans might expect. She describes

it as being more thoughtful. “We’ve actually got something of relevance to say,” adds Kylie. In the meantime, Diva Demolition remain grateful for the support they have received at Brothers saying they have a good following in Ipswich. “These gigs here, this is what we do now. Music is our thing,” says Kylie. “We don’t have other jobs. This is not just a weekend thing for us.” “Nothing to fall back on!” laughs Sherree. “This is our bread and butter and we certainly appreciate the work but we also have a lot of fun too, so it’s a bonus,” says Kylie. “There’s always a sense of freedom here. Because we’ve got four sets to play with we can play a bit of our original stuff, we can play some of our favourite covers. It’s generally a bit of a party.” “Within the first two songs people are going to be dancing which is awesome!” says Sherree. “And that sets the benchmark for the rest of the night. It’s all up from there.” “It’s a real mixed crowd too because there’s something for everyone. You can play to some older people and you can play to some really young ones who come in a bit later,” says Kylie. “Thanks everyone for supporting us and thanks for buying our CDs. We always sell good merchandise here.” “And for coming here and having a good time,” adds Sherree. “And supporting music in general.”

NEXT APPEARING AT BROTHERS SAT 24 SEPT & FRIDAY 25 NOV Photography: Caz Thomas

October

ENTERTAINMENT

THURSDAYS

FRIDAYS

11:00AM-2:00PM

SOLOISTS & DUOS EASY LISTENING

PARTY PUB ROCK

CLUB STYLE VARIETY

50’S & 60’S ROCK ‘N’ ROLL

SATURDAYS

8:00PM-11:00PM

06 October Billy Guy

07 October Stray Fragments

01 October Atmosphere

13 October Marco

14 October The Fonoti Brothers

08 October Caught in the Act

20 October Tracy Vaughan

21 October Paisley Road

15 October Vintage

27 October Baby Boomer Party Band

28 October Ear Candy

22 October Rock Steady 29 October Midnight Rambler

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FRIDAYS

SATURDAYS

SUNDAYS

9:30PM-1:30AM

2:00PM-6:00PM

07 October Chester

01 October Wasabi

02 October Hot Rocks & Rockettes

14 October No Standing

08 October Zoophonic Blonde

09 October Crisis the Band

21 October The Lazy Valentines

15 October The Whiskey Brothers

16 October Bit by Bit

28 October BrisVegas

22 October Dave Ritter Band

23 October Cool Change

29 October Vertigo

30 October Little Stevie & Tail Fins

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Saturday 8 October TICKETS $55 RECEPTION OR $50 OUTIX.NET

Dirty Dickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is a unique entertainment and dining concept set in a totally themed environment with a highly comical stage show, magnificent 3 course banquet, costumed serving staff, providing non stop interactive fun in true olden day tradition. Sing-a-Long, Clap-a-Long and Laugh-a-Long as you experience the hilarious antics, madcap merrymaking and funtastic festivities of this unforgettable night. Seating allocated by the venue. People in same booking sit together. Please arrive by 7pm to be seated prior to the show. If you have any specific dietary requirements please advise when booking.

FEATURE

It’s all about the

MusiQue Something special is happening at Brothers Ipswich and you can catch a glimpse of it every Sunday night in the Sports Bar. In January of last year, guitarist and sound engineer Andy Makin contacted the club looking for a venue for his group of local musicians to catch up socially and play guitar. Soon after, the Ipswich Guitar Collective began meeting and performing every week in the Sports Bar. “When I moved to Ipswich, I was thinking what do I do? Do I go out and learn Latin dancing? What do I do to make friends? So that’s what I did. There was like five of us,” Andy recalls. “I wanted a nice room. I came in here one night and saw all the bands and thought ‘gee this would be a great room for it – if only you guys would let me have it’ and fortunately you did.”

EVERY SUNDAY AT BROTHERS ALL WELCOME FROM 7PM

I find we are building a bit of a “community here, it’s just really friendly and we feel like a big family. | VIVICA

The trade-off for Brothers was performances would be free for members to watch and other musicians who wanted to take part would be invited to join in. It turned out plenty were, and less than eighteen months later the collective now has over 100 active participants. “I only started it to make friends because I moved to Ipswich and I didn’t know anybody – and now I’ve got like 120 friends!” Andy laughs. It’s no longer just a guitar collective as all kinds of musicians have since become involved. And it’s no longer just an Ipswich thing as people from all over southeast Queensland have made the trip to Brothers to take part. In fact, it has been so successful that Andy has had to put limits on soloists in favour of collaborative group performances to give more people an opportunity to get on stage. As a result, the name of what Andy now describes as a ‘performance collective’ had to change and MusiQue was born. “It’s a French word that means music but with a capital Q in the middle because that’s Queensland,” he explains. “Obviously, if everyone who has been here came on the same night, we wouldn’t be able to put them all on,” says Andy. “Fortunately, without any organisation on my part, it’s worked out. Every night is different.”

Photography: David Buttner

The reason for MusiQue’s success lies in the fact that it is much more than just a typical open mic night at a pub. There are many aspects to what the group is about. At its core is a social group for people who simply share a love of live music. But it’s also a great professional and artistic networking vehicle that has already resulted in a number of collaborations between members who

had previously never met. Individuals have helped each other out for one-off events or permanently joined existing groups. Several entire bands have formed from scratch after meeting at MusiQue. And perhaps unexpectedly, it has turned out to be a fantastic nursery for young and previously undiscovered talent. “We’ve had people that are just starting out. For example, two girls came and played and this was their first ever public performance,” says Andy. “I’ve actually had to talk some of them into performing. But when they’ve done it – you just know they’re going to remember that forever.” One of the first non-guitarists to join the collective was drummer, Ashleigh Mac. Now fronting up almost every week, Ash was instrumental in the evolution of MusiQue from its origins to what it has become. He says the opportunity for young people to play alongside experienced musicians in a live band situation is hugely beneficial to their development. “If you can get to the stage where they can throw you along half a dozen chords or say it’s a swing beat and give you something like that and you can improvise through the whole thing, then you’re starting to be a real musician. Because that’s what music is about.” Two young artists who would agree are Jed Moorcroft and Sam Krzewina from local rock band Siren. They have been regulars since the early days but were just starting out when they first got involved with the collective. By their own admission, they were pretty raw. “But we were a band – technically,” jokes Sam. Being thrown in the deep end has accelerated their development.

MusiQue continued...

Jed says it is common to end up playing songs they’ve never rehearsed and sometimes that they don’t even recognise. “I just get up there and they start playing something and I don’t know what it is until we get to the chorus and I go…oh” he says. “It’s good practice too,” agrees Sam. “To be able to play with someone else who’s ten times better than you. You have to learn on the spot.” According to Ash, these days the boys play classic rock that was released decades before they were born better than some of the people who grew up with it. “It’s scary” he laughs. “The talent that is around is quite mind-boggling,” agrees Andy. “And all these kids want is somewhere to play.” Even more experienced artists, such as bass player Darren Griffiths say MusiQue has made them a better musician. As a veteran of more than twenty bands covering multiple genres from country to heavy metal, Darren says he keeps coming back for the opportunity to improvise with people he’s never played with before and to experiment with different styles.

“A lot of the older musos don’t mind sharing with the younger people. It’s like in the old days when a tradesman

One of the most talented members of the group is also one of the youngest. Still only 17, Vivica has been performing

up there. We just have fun.” Andy says there have been a number of established musicians call in and express similar views. For example, Stretch (Keith Kerwin) has visited three times. A professional musician based in Cleveland, he has written songs recorded by Renee Geyer and John Paul Young and toured with Jon English.

“I was practicing in a garage band out at Brassall. But out of this, I’ve ended up in four other bands because this is the greatest bit of networking. It’s awesome.”

“At first it was probably every three or four weeks, now it’s virtually every week unless I’m away. It’s hard to stop coming now,” he says. “I’m also encouraging other musos that don’t have the confidence to get up on stage with us and back them up as well.” Andy believes this is one of the great things about MusiQue.

would teach their craft to the younger people,” he says. “You’re working with live musicians and things change, things happen. It’s basically about learning the craft of performing.”

“He just said it’s a really good vibe and it’s different to the other places,” recalls Andy. “He said he’ll come back. At the moment he’s touring.” Andy says he is pretty happy with the way MusiQue is developing but would like to see the core group get tighter and become a really hot act while still encouraging new people to join in. “We’re not snobby, we’re not cliquey or anything like that,” he says. “We’re very welcoming. But we have to be entertaining and that’s what it comes down to. And it’s going really well. It’s attracting like-minded people.”

“We’ve had our ups and downs with different members coming along. The people that don’t respect the other people, they just | ASH don’t come back. I have to keep reminding people what it’s about. It’s about fun, it’s about music. It’s not about politics, it’s not about religion. You come here and you professionally for about four years after enjoy the end of your week.” having been coached by the legendary “I would like to see an appreciative vocalist, Venetta Fields. When she audience come and enjoy it and dance was just 13, Vivica released an album and whatever. Because a performance has of songs she wrote as a 12 year old to have an audience and when people get and regularly performs in Sydney and up and dance you feel so much better.” Melbourne. She first dropped in on the collective about a year ago after learning MusiQue meet every Sunday at 7pm in about it from a friend. the Sports Bar. Everyone is welcome to check it out. If you would like to have a “And I just fell in love with it and have been go at performing, bring your gear and here ever since,” she says. “Honestly, I speak to Andy on the night. Otherwise, just love the atmosphere. The people are so nice. And we always have a good time sit back and enjoy the show.

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

RESPONSIBLE GAMBLING

e o n e i t h c p k n t ’ u a c y o ? Bet c h u o m t o n ambli g g o s ’ h w eet o n e i t h B c p k u n o t ’ y ’re right. u a c y o ? Bet c h u o m t o n g l a bi who’s g m

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They say Aussies will bet on anything. Even two flies climbing up a wall. It’s no surprise then that anyone can get in over their head. Maybe it’s you? Free and confidential help is available.

Call the Gambling Helpline 1800 858 858 or visit www.gamblinghelponline.org.au They say Aussies will bet on anything. Even two flies climbing up a wall. It’s no surprise then that anyone can get in over their head. Maybe it’s you? Free and confidential help is available.

Call the Gambling Helpline 1800 858 858 or visit www.gamblinghelponline.org.au

WHEN YOU JUST NEED AN EAR Somewhere in Australia there is a new call to Lifeline every minute. SALVO CARE LINE 1300 36 36 22 13 SALVOS (13 72 58)

24HR CRISIS LINE 13 11 14

headspace Ipswich is here to help young people aged 12 to 25 who are going through a tough time.

(07) 3280 7900 HEADSPACE IPSWICH

November

ENTERTAINMENT

THURSDAYS

FRIDAYS

11:00AM-2:00PM

SOLOISTS & DUOS EASY LISTENING

PARTY PUB ROCK

CLUB STYLE VARIETY

50’S & 60’S ROCK ‘N’ ROLL

SATURDAYS

8:00PM-11:00PM

03 November Rob Rosenlund & Tony Jeffrey

04 November 60s Sensation Show Band

10 November Chris Doyle

11 November StrumPet

8:00PM-11:00PM 05 November Route 66 12 November Kaffene

18 November Hillbilly Dix

19 November Buddy Love and the Tremors

25 November Zed 28

26 November Indecision

O BAR

FRIDAYS

SATURDAYS

SUNDAYS

17 November Paul Renton 24 November Glenn Callaghan

9:30PM-1:30AM 04 November Men Behaving Loudly 11 November Cherry Bomb 18 November Paradigm

9:30PM-1:30AM

2:00PM-6:00PM

05 November Half Monte

06 November Just Five

12 November Rush Hour

13 November Wally & The Gators

19 November Dirty Dice

20 November The Rock Hounds

26 November Sarenda

27 November Hot Wire

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25 November Diva Demolition

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MONDAY MORNINGS CASH PRIZES

TUESDAY EVENINGS FUN NIGHT OF TRIVIA

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JOIN US FOR ALL THE COLOUR AND SPECTACLE OF THE SPRING CARNIVAL’S BIGGEST DAY OF RACING IN STYLE AT BROTHERS.

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FUN AND GAMES, PRIZES AND GIVEWAYS, A TOUCH OF MAGIC AND ALL THE RACING LIVE ON THE BIG SCREEN JOIN US FOR ALL THE COLOUR AND SPECTACLE OF THE SPRING CARNIVAL’S BIGGEST DAY OF RACING IN STYLE. HOSTED BY RESIDENT ILLUSIONIST JOSH NORBIDO AND FEATURING MUSICAL ENTERTAINMENT BY THE EXCEPTIONAL TAMARA O’CALLAGHAN $45 MEMBERS | $50 NON-MEMBERS YOUR TICKET INCLUDES ALL THIS PLUS A FABULOUS LUNCH AND A COMPLIMENTARY DRINK ON ARRIVAL PLACES ARE LIMITED. BOOK NOW 3817 2999

ST EDMUND’S COLLEGE AND BROTHERS LEAGUES CLUB PROUDLY PRESENT THEIR ANNUAL CAROLS ON THE GREEN. All proceeds of the evening will go to St Vincent de Paul Ipswich to help the needy families in our community. Collection tins will be distributed throughout the evening to support this wonderful organisation.

Come along, bring your family and friends, a picnic blanket and folding chairs and enjoy an evening of spectacular entertainment.

IN FOCUS

Hancock Brothers Hockey Club

Having just celebrated its 80th Anniversary, long-time Kindred Club member, the Hancock Brothers Hockey Club can trace its roots back to a North Ipswich timber mill in the early nineteen-thirties. Employees of Hancock Bros Plywood and Timber Mill used to spend their lunchtimes playing “bush” or “back street hockey” with a length of timber for a stick and a lump of wood as a ball.

In 1936 the workers put together a side in the B Grade competition and despite only three of them having ever played the game before, and only four having even seen a game before, the team with an average age of 17 years took out the title, dropping only one match in their first season. The following year they were elevated to the A Grade competition and just two years later won their first premiership in the top division. Today, having officially merged with the women’s club in 2001, Hancocks field teams across a number of divisions within the Ipswich Hockey competition – everything from the fast competition of A Grade to the more relaxed, social format that is A2. Their 200 or so players range in ages from 6-7 years to “none of your business”. Club President, Paul Hardie says the Buzzsaws’ history is full of successes including a run of consecutive Men’s A Grade premierships from 1955 - 1971 and 1975 - 1987. Most recently, the A Grade Men’s and Women’s sides both won the premiership in 2015. For the men, this broke a 28 year drought

and for the ladies, it was just desserts after two successive grand final losses in 2013 and 2014. The R2 ladies side also won their premiership, capping off a successful senior season for the club. With this year’s finals about to commence, Hancocks is excited to have a number of teams across juniors and seniors who are top of their division. “Hopefully we can add a bit more silverware to the cabinet this season,” says Paul. The club has been involved in many individual success stories too, including Wayne Greene who represented Australia as a Goalkeeper in 1975, 1977-1980 and 1982. Barry Dancer represented Australia in 1973-1979 as a player where he won a silver medal in the 1976 summer Olympics in Montreal. Barry then coached the Kookaburras from 2001-2008 where they won their first ever gold medal in 2004 in Athens and a bronze medal in 2008 in Beijing. And striker Jordyn Holzberger was a member of the Hockeyroos from 2012-2014, has just been announced in 2016 as a squad

member for the Australian U23 side and recently competed in a tournament in the UK in the lead-up to the Junior World Cup later this year. Paul says Hancocks support the Hockey Association in developing players throughout Ipswich and surrounding areas and encourages people who are curious to give it a try. “Absolutely anyone can join at any age. It is a fantastic way to keep fit and works almost all your muscles,” he says. “With the reformatted Hook-in2-Hockey program even kids under the age of 10 can learn the basics in a safe and fun way.” Hancocks members are extremely proud of their long history and association with hockey in Ipswich. They describe themselves as a family club, with many junior and senior players being the sons, daughters and grandchildren of previous club members. The club is built on a large number of volunteers who hold committee positions not only with Hancocks, but also with the Ipswich Hockey Association.

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

We encourage all members to “represent the club with pride each week, play hard and play fair. | PAUL, CLUB PRESIDENT Photos taken at our 80th Birthday celebrations: 1: Life Members; 2: Janette Howells (Life Member) and Lesley McLeod (Club Secretary); 3: Paul Hardie (President), Sara Rogers (Women’s Club Captain 2016), Dean Pavitt (Men’s Club Captain 2016) & Barry Dancer (Life Member); 4: Sue Woodford & Peter Conway were awared life membership.

“We encourage all members to represent the club with pride each week, play hard and play fair,” says Paul. “Participation is the key to keeping hockey going but most of all we want players to enjoy pulling on the jersey each week.”

B Grade Mens Premiers 1936 First ever premiership team in Hancocks

They are also proud of their membership of Brothers Kindred Clubs. “Being a part of a large sporting network like Brothers has allowed us to grow and attract new members,” explains Paul. “With hockey played in winter, it’s fairly common for our players to play cricket in summer. Brothers allows for club members to have access to other sports and also attract new members to hockey. And the recognition our juniors receive through the Junior Sports Star Awards is a real boost for the kids in the club. It gives our club the opportunity to recognise their effort and reward them for it.” Paul also says Brothers provides Hancocks with a venue to gather and celebrate successes and to socialise with other teams.

rs 2015 A Grade Ladies Premie

“We are involved in the raffles at the Leagues Club which provides us with great exposure as well as financial assistance, something all sporting clubs appreciate.” Fixtures are played from March through to September at the Ipswich Hockey Association located at Briggs Road in Raceview. Games range from a Friday night through to Sunday evening with junior fixtures on Saturday and Sunday mornings and senior fixtures in the afternoon / evening. For the men’s and women’s A Grade teams there is also a combined competition each year between the Ipswich Hockey Association and the Toowoomba Hockey Association. This involves ten rounds of games between the A Grade teams in Toowoomba and Ipswich, played in both locations. Training is on Wednesday and Thursday nights (can vary from season to season) at Briggs Road.

A Grade Mens Premiers 2015

Fees vary from season to season based on registration requirements. Anyone interested in playing next year should keep an eye out for the sign-on in early 2017. “And if you can make it, come on down and support us in the finals” says Paul. In the meantime you can contact the club on email hbhcsecretary@gmail.com or via their Facebook page www.facebook.com/HancockBrothersHockeyClub.

R2 Premiers 2015

Carl Groenewald Photography

VOLUNTEER FOR OUR KINDRED CLUBS

! u o Y d e e N We H elp som eon e

help yourself

Our Kindred Clubs are always on the lookout for volunteers. Contact one of them today!

VOLUNTEERING IS ASSOCIATED WITH GREATER HEALTH & HAPPINESS & EVEN A FEW HOURS OF VOLUNTEER WORK MAKES A DIFFERENCE.

WELCOME TO OUR NEWEST KINDRED CLUB

South Coast Branch Nipper Club of the Year! 28

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

BROTHERS KINDRED CLUBS CONTACT PAGE BROTHERS SENIOR FOOTBALL CLUB

BROTHERS JUNIOR FOOTBALL CLUB

Contact Helen Richardson Email bellza64@gmail.com Phone 0402 811 511

Contact Dane McQueen 0418 952 253 Contact Jason Connors 0403 385 554 Email brothersipswichjrl@hotmail.com

www.seniors.brothersipswich.com.au

www.juniors.brothersipswich.com.au

BROTHERS OLD BOYS & SUPPORTERS

BROTHERS CRICKET CLUB

Contact James McGill Email jf.kb@optusnet.com.au BOBS@brothersipswich.com.au Phone 0434 353 874

Contact Brent Kinnane Email ipswichbrotherscricket@gmail.com Phone 0407 155 202

HANCOCK BROTHERS HOCKEY CLUB Contact Paul Hardie Email paul@bryntawelhorses.com Phone 0418 870 373 www.hancockbrothers.ipswichhockey.com

www.brothersipswich.qld.cricket.com.au

BROTHERS BASKETBALL CLUB Contact Michael Hughes Email hughes28@hotmail.com Phone 0487 184 560

BROTHERS NETBALL CLUB

BROTHERS SOCIAL BOWLS CLUB

Contact Julianne Elton Email brothersnetball@gmail.com Phone 0400 241 954

Contact Mark Potts Email brothersbowls@gmail.com Phone 0401 250 841

BROTHERS SOCIAL DARTS CLUB Contact Daniel Suchanow Phone 3812 0101

BROTHERS SOCIAL GOLF CLUB Contact Don Currie Email doncurrie53@gmail.com Phone 0439 725 313

CYMS ST EDMUNDS SWIMMING CLUB BROTHERS AOOB Contact Jack Ryan Phone 07 3816 1411

Contact Greg Roche Email president@cymsstedmunds.com.au Phone 0411 131 066 www.cymsstedmunds.com.au

IPSWICH ATHLETICS CLUB

IPSWICH BOWLS CLUB

Contact Vic Pascoe Email vgpascoe1@bigpond.com Phone 0409 754 884

Contact Daryl Knight Email darryl_knight@optusnet.com.au Phone 0432 187 206

www.ipswichathletics.org.au

www.ipswichbowlsclub.bowls.com.au

NOBBYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BEACH S.L.S.C. Contact Email Phone

Sue-Anne Sessarago; Belinda Doman admin@nobbysslsc.com 07 5526 1117 (Mon-Thurs 10am-3pm)

PROUDLY SUPPORTING OUR COMMUNITY

www.nobbysslsc.com.au

JOKES FOR FRANK WITH THANKS TO JACK Source: funny-pictures.funmunch.com

SERENITY Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, ‘How old was your husband?’ ‘98,’ she replied. ‘Two years older than me’. ‘So you’re 96,’ the undertaker said. She responded, ‘Hardly worth going home, is it? Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: ‘And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?’ the reporter asked. She simply replied, ‘No peer pressure.’ The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs and have fun finding them. I’ve sure gotten old! I’ve had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I’m half blind, can’t hear anything quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia, have poor circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can’t remember if I’m 85 or 92. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver’s license.

TAKING TURNS While working the lunch shift at a local restaurant, I watched as an elderly couple ate. It seemed as if the man was the only one eating. First his appetiser, then his main, and then finally his dessert. All the while with his wife just looking on, not even touching her food. Confused, I approached the woman and asked if there was anything I could get for her. “No thank you,” came her answer, “it’s his turn for the teeth.”

SECRET TO A HAPPY LIFE A lady noticed an old happy man sitting on his porch. “Excuse me” she said “I just couldn’t help noticing how happy you look. Tell me, what is the secret to your long happy life.” “Well, the man responded, “I eat fatty foods, never exercise. I also smoke three packs of cigarettes a day, and drink about a case of whiskey a week.” “Wow” the women said “and how old are you?” “Twenty eight”, he said!

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor’s permission to join a fitness club and start exercising.

Source: funny-pictures.funmunch.com

A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.” The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now.” The child ran back to his father and said, “You lied to me!” His father replied, “No, your mum was talking about her side of the family.” Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven.” Teacher: “No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven.” Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Six.” Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven!” Teacher: “Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!” Johnny: “Because I’ve already got a freaking cat!” A husband and wife were driving through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. At the counter, the husband asked the blonde waitress, “Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are very slowly?” She leaned over the counter and said, “Burrr-gerrr Kiiing.”

I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over. My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat until the wrinkles fill out.

Source: laughfactory.com Source: s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com

NEW SEATBELT DESIGN 45% LESS ACCIDENTS

BROTHERS BULLETIN: SPRING EDITION

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BEATLEGS 30 SEPTEMBER

MusiQue Sundays 7pm

BOOK

BEATLEGS TICKETS! FATHER’S DAY

OF DOL NDS 8.30pm RTLARS S STA AW DRUSA WED:THO WORTH OF NEW PRIZES EVERY WEEK!

DRAWS START AT 8.30PM

SUNDAY SEPT 4

a 8pm on the day of each raffle to receive the Rewards Kiosk between 5pm and be Swipe your membership card once in receive. Additional ticket vouchers will swipe, the more lucky numbers you will voucher for FREE entries. The earlier you prizes on the gaming floor. To be in the card for purchases in the club and as bonus earned when you use your membership displayed. tickets before 8.30pm. All prizes are as draw, exchange your vouchers for raffle

Full terms and conditions available at

reception.

DIVA DEMOLITION

MON +WED EVENINGS CASH & PRIZES

24 SEPT 25 NOV

| Kicks off at 7pm

FIR •

PRIZES EVERY D AY!

*Full terms and conditions available from reception.

E • ENJOY A ARBI FRE EB TH SH

YOUR BROTHERS MEMBERSHIP & GO INTO THE DRAW TO SHARE IN A

E FIR

RENEW, JOIN OR UPDATE

DS IEN FEED THE FAM FR T• ILY EA TR

ENTER NOW!

ENJOY A DR INK W ITH

WIN!!!

BOOK EARLY!

INDULGE

on the

BE R •

Carols

1 NOVEM • TUESDAY

– 1 1 NOV E MBE R 6.30PM –

RENEW, JOIN OR UPDATE

First Call 10.30am | Doors Open 9.30am

IT RU

Registration from 6pm

MONDAY MORNINGS CASH PRIZES

WINNE

BROTHERS BOTTLE SHOP OPEN UNTIL MIDNIGHT 7 DAYS

TICKETS 5 FO R $1

DRAWN 2.30P

MONDAY - FR M IDAY

Winners must be present at time of each draw. Compos details will be made ition of prizes may available prior to commencement change for each for each raffle is of ticket sales. Approxim $500 and is based raffle and on recommended may be won as ate total value of part of club promotio retail price at time all of purchase. Addition prizes ns or purchased using Loyalty Reward al tickets Points at the Rewards Kiosk. receptio

Full terms and conditio ns available at

BLUE R IBBON HONDA

DARE TO DREAM

BLUE RIBBON HONDA “Celebrating 42 Years In Ipswich”

393 Warwick Road, Yamanto www.blueribbonhonda.com.au

Call us today

3280 3400