TopicUK January 2017 Leeds Edition

Page 38

Health & WellbeingUpdate

New Year Resolutions, Goals & Ambitions Meet Health and Safety Coach Susan Dellanzo who will regularly contribute to our wellbeing

How many times have you set seemingly achievable New Year’s resolutions or goals, only to find yourself having broken them just days or weeks later? Have you ever wondered why this keeps happening? Each year I get clients saying they want to lose weight, for example. I remember asking one lady “What would be the benefits if you did?” and she couldn’t come up with one! It’s a common issue and although many people say they want

this or that, when it comes down to it they haven’t linked enough reasons to actually achieving this or that. If you can’t come up with any legitimate reasons to do or get what you say you want, you’re living a fantasy expecting yourself to act or do something when you’re not in reality interested or inspired to do so. This is also where most people go crazy and where their self worth and self esteem spiral down together.

Whenever you expect yourself to do something you don’t actually feel inspired or have the “values” to do, you’ll appear to self defeat or “sabotage” yourself. and yet still on a waiting list….? Then you’ll end up judging and criticising yourself rather than realising this so-called “negative” feedback is actually designed perfectly for you. It’s showing how you are either living outside your own “values”, expecting yourself W H Y W A I T A N Y L O N G E R ? to do what others say you “should” be Dedicated to empowering and making a qualitative difference doing, and/or you in the lives of my clients by imparting a depth of knowledge haven’t identified and skills in how to overcome adversity, reduce stress, resolve conflict, improve relationships, as well as optimising physical enough benefits to health, vitality and mental wellbeing. act according to your desires. International Relationship, Health & Lifestyle Coach, Author & Speaker You are NOT a failure nor are you broken! Tel : 07469 703816 For more information : On the contrary, you email : susan@susandellanzo.com are providing yourself

SUFFERING

38

enormous feedback. Most people, however, think there is something wrong with them. They then try and get rid of this feedback by trying to do personal development work on themselves which is futile and leads to insanity. In addition, whenever you say you want to do something just to get away from a perceived “pain”, this is also pointless. What you run from, you run into. Much wiser to first ask how the perceived “pain” is actually serving you and then make a better choice. And even if you still something as truly painful, if you still haven’t identified enough reasons and benefits to move towards its opposite, you will end up focusing more on your “pain” than your “pleasure”. Even though you say it’s painful I guarantee it will still be a lot more comfortable to stay there than to move towards that which you have no legitimate concise and clear plan to attain. Make sure too that your resolutions, goals and ambitions aren’t just fantasies either. I see this time and time again. “Fantasies” come with “nightmares”. Much wiser to make equilibrated choices from the start rather than ending up paying the dire consequences later which I have seen can be quite devastating for many. If you are looking for help and are truly committed to getting rid of the “fantasy” and/or self defeating loops in order to achieve what you want, please do get in touch. It’s amazing what you accomplish when you have the right motives.

January 2017 - Leeds & district Edition

TopicUK_Leeds_Jan17_52pp.indd 38

22/12/16 18:00


Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.