Sunshine, Seniors and Smiles All in One

By Liana Measmer

Holiday time can be a lonely time if you aren’t sharing it with loved ones. More so for a senior citizen, who may have lost a spouse or whose family lives far away. That’s why a group of local women set out to offer some holiday cheer to local seniors who were alone this season.

Marie Morrison, Jo Leary, Patricia Coye, Arlene Mazmanian, and Cynthia McCormack got together to create the ‘Sunshine Gals’, a group devoted to do just that. Bring sunshine to others. Along with volunteers Linda Parks, Cheryl Coye, and Bill Foley, this group launched their first event and hosted a Christmas Eve lunch for 67 senior citizens that warmed their hearts.

“We hope to host something like this two or three times a year,” said McCormack.

For guest Lucille MacKinnon, this event was enjoyable. A widow for 25 years, MacKinnon knows all too well what it’s like to spend Christmas Eve by herself. Although she leads an active life and enjoys spending her time at the Senior Center, she finds her circle of friends doesn’t always include other couples, the folks she spent the most time with before.

“It’s not easy,” said MacKinnon.

By going to the Christmas Eve dinner, MacKinnon got to share this holiday with other people she knew, folks who were alone too. She especially liked the home cooked meal, the DJ and the little cookie tins each guest received as a gift

“It was such a nice thing right before Christmas,” said MacKinnon.

Back in October, the planning began. The group decided on the Lodge of the Elks as a venue and a full turkey dinner with all the ‘fixins’ on the menu. The group wanted to thank the generous individuals, businesses and groups, like the Lions Club, DJ Curtis Knight, The Emblem Club, and the Elks, who donated money and services.

The group of volunteers gathered a list of seniors and sent out 75 invitations for dinner. The end result was 67 attendees. Although the dinner was scheduled to start at noon, folks excitedly began arriving at 10:30 am. Once seated, they began enjoying the moist roasted turkey, creamy mashed potatoes and cooked veggies with cranberry sauce, all topped by Morrison’s secret ‘world famous’ gravy. (Rumor has it that the gravy is ‘secret’ because no one’s quite sure how to make it again!) When asked why they gave up their holiday, the answer was clear.

“We are all fortunate,” said Morrison.

Once dinner ended, DJ Curtis Knight gave everyone sheets of sing along songs and Santa himself made an appearance, stopping at each table to say ‘hello’.

“They all loved him,” said McCormack.

By 2:30 pm, after desserts and coffee and a lot of smiles and laughter, the crowd said their good-byes. The volunteers, in their red aprons, kicked off their shoes and relaxed while DJ Curtis Knight continued playing holiday favorites. A great success, the group reflected over their day and recalled their purpose. Giving and selflessness.

“That’s what holidays are about-Others,” said Mazmanian.

Improve Your Health, Make a Friend

By Dr. Gina Aguayo, Ph. D.

Another year is upon us and with it have come many new opportunities to enhance our lives and well being. One way to improve your well being this year is to increase the number of friendships/positive relationships in your life or develop new ones, if you are lacking in this area.

This sounds like an easy task to accomplish; however, it very often is not. Perhaps the many barriers people may encounter make this task seem too difficult to achieve. One common obstacle people bump into is not knowing where to meet new people. Another is figuring out how to shift acquaintances into close and lasting friends. One more impediment can be feeling uncomfortable with new people or situations. All of these sticking points can be overcome with some planning and a determination.

To overcome the possibility that meeting new people is difficult because your life does not give you opportunities to do this naturally, plan for it. Do you go to the same lunch place every day? Make small talk with the people working there. They will begin to remember you (and the way you like your sandwich) which could lead to a more in-depth conversation. Do you take a walk everyday for exercise? Find a walking group and join them instead of hoofing it alone. Use the internet: Facebook, meetup.com, craigslist. You need to do some searching, but the payoff could be great!

If you are one of those people with a ton of acquaintances but no real friends, you are ahead of the game. All these relationships need is a little nurturing to become full fledged friendships. If you normally interact with these people via technology (facebook, email, text) ask them if they would like to meet for coffee or lunch and converse in person. Find out when you would be able to schedule a mutually interesting activity like a movie or attending a sporting event. Time together, in person, makes the relationship stronger and eventually become a true friendship.

Some people have a very difficult time being in new situations and/or interacting with new people. The best way to minimize these feelings is to set the environment up such that it is as familiar and comfortable for you as possible. If you are meeting someone new, meet him/ her at the café in your favorite bookstore. If you are going to your first tennis lesson, bring along someone you know and you can both benefit from the instruction. Another reason to keep at it is that the more often you engage in a behavior that causes you some distress the less of an affect it has on you.

Remember, as difficult as this may sound, it is for you. Spending some time focused on your well being is important and enhancing your social connections at the same time is the bonus!

Gina M. Aguayo, Ph.D. is co-owner and Director of the Billerica Counseling Center and has been a practicing Psychologist for 10 years. If you have questions that you would like Dr. Gina to answer, please email her at drgina@billericacounselingcenter.com