PERSPECTIVES The placement of place cards > I attended a dinner party recently, where place cards were on the dining table indicating where each guest should sit. Place cards are helpful for people to find their seats, and they also add an elegant touch to a meal, formal or informal. One of the guests, unhappy with her place, removed her card and exchanged it for a more desirable (in her opinion) seat. She later complained that she didn’t enjoy the evening because she wasn’t included much in the conversation. Oh, my! This “lady” broke an etiquette rule, and suffered the consequences. The late Elsa Maxwell, who was internationally famous for her dinner parties, said “the most certain route to chaos at a dinner party is not having place cards telling everyone where to go.” According to Letitia Baldridge, famous protocol advisor to the Kennedy Administration, and currently a bestselling author on business protocol, “seating is a sensitive and logistically important aspect of good entertaining, whether one is giving a private party or a lunch for four hundred.” It’s a daunting job to seat a large party, especially when guests don’t RSVP properly, and drop on and off the list right up to the last moment. Anyone planning a wedding will immediately know what I mean! This is where seating charts; door lists (for large events), and place cards come in. The savvy host will draw up a seating chart; make a door list (a list of guests names in alphabetical order, with a table number assigned to each person) and write place cards. Staff or caterers are supplied with the door lists and help the guests find their tables and seats. It is a breach of etiquette to change a seating arrangement in the hope of making one’s place better or more important. Hosts, whether at a private party or a corporate event, spend significant time on, and give considerable thought to, seating their guests. They have sound reasons for their decisions. There is precedent to consider; politics to consider; business alliances to consider. Additionally, the wise host will know who among the guests have little liking for one another – think of family holiday dinners! Guests, then, should never change seats – no matter the reason. I refer you back to Letitia Baldridge who wrote, in The Art of Business Entertaining, “This kind of behavior can only be labeled as despicable” Strong words indeed!
Etiquette & Protocol By Kathleen Harvey Harshberger
Executive Summary: The use and abuse of place cards is no trivial matter if you want the best experience at your event.
So enjoy your next dinner party no matter where you are seated. You never know what friendship or business opportunity might develop.
vbFRONT / JUNE 2017
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