Bostonese STYLUS DOES ITS PART
going anywhere near the ‘Disturber.” Domo Arigato, Mr. Janitor.
Stylus’ super-sleek new issue, made with Adobe InDesign on our brand-new Dell is 100% BIODEGRADEABLE! Probably...
FORGING A BRIDGE INTO THE RECENT PAST
“OPENING DOORS” FOR BC STUDENTS
Recent polling of the Boston College janitorial staff has proven beyond contention that Stylus is in fact the most effective improvised doorstop currently in use, being both more absorbent, and significantly more durable than any other competing undergraduate publication (especially its primary, reactionary competitor, the Observer.) One janitor, preferring to remain anonymous, comments, “You know, those Stylus’ are just fantastic, first things I reach for when I need to keep a door open.” When asked if he would ever consider using another publication he replied “Listen, Stylus is the only doorstop for me. I know a quality product when I see one, I’m not
8
Stylus is proud to announce that it has emerged from nescient slumbering and is exploring terrific technological opportunities that will lead to a new era of massmedia manipulation. Stylus has created a new website, founded Facebook and Wikipedia pages, gotten a Twitter and crafted a Firefox persona. Further, it is currently investing in technology that will allow information to be beamed directly into the minds of beloved Stylites everywere. “What’s a Twitter?” asks graduating Stylus Editor, Richard Horan, when pressed to elucidate.
WHAT? ME, WORRY?
Recent proposals to move the Stylus online have been met with concerns by the BC administration that censorship may be required.Website editor Stephen Lovely responds, “Well, fuck.”