Youth Unlimited Issue 9

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H T U YONLIMITED

ISSUE 009

U

By young people, for young people

TINCHY STRYDER

BLACK HISTORY MONTH EVENT CHRISTMAS IDEAS FEET ROMANIA GINGER PHOBIA BOYS VS GIRLS SIZE ZERO MIXED HERITAGE SELF-ESTEEM ALTERNATIVES TO UNI


Contents

CONTENTS Just for you... 4

8 16

20 24 30 32 36 40

Black History Month Event Event held at Oceana Kingston Ginger Phobia Why are redheads targeted? Inteview with Deputy MYP / Youth Parliament National Campaigns Insight into Kingston’s Youth Parliament from Albert Simango The Zero Years In-depth look at the size zero myth Romania Youth exchange Mixed Race Mixed Feelings Exploring mixed heritages Organ Donation How organ donation saves lives Interview with Kingston Police Lives of policemen out of uniform Body Language The signs to look out for

BOYS/GIRLS...

11 Alternatives to Uni

TOP TIPS...

12 15 18 29 38 42 46

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Stretch Marks Feet Self-Esteem Smoothies Christmas Ideas Condoms Tea

MUSIC... 10

Isle of Wight Festival

PUZZLES... 47 47 47

Welcome

Hello lovely readers!

Hope you've enjoyed the break over summer, we did (and goodness knows we needed it - this magazine doesn't write itself, you know...) but now it's back to school or college, shorter days and bad weather and other unexciting things. So, if the autumn and winter blues are getting you down a bit, hopefully issue 9 of YU will bring a little ray of sunshine into your life. And if they're not, good for you, but please read our stuff anyway. Thank you and enjoy! Vicki Exworthy, YU editor Youth Unlimited! Kingston’s best youth magazine written and designed exclusively by young people, for young people.

The Team... Editor Sub editor -

34 The Rant 44 Confused by the Oppostite Sex 19 Boys Fashion 28 Girls Fashion

OPPORTUNITIES...

Lette r from Edit Hello... or

Sudoku Pennies and Matchsticks Dingbats

Vicki Exworthy Amy Solman

Journalists - Vicky Godwin Nan Pancoast Ramanan Gukathasan Mayank Sharma Alex Stone Lucie Parkinson Allysia Wood Joni Clarke Aylon Wijaiyarajah Philip Ball Sarah Cooper Jake Stamps Kevin Arulrajah Georgina Perryman Jessica Garthwaite Lucy Findlater Photography and Artwork Sebastian Santa-Maria

Contact us on....

Email: youthunlimited@rbk.kingston.gov.uk Phone: 020 8547 6792 Text: 07795813052

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On the 15th October 2008, one of the biggest events of the year took place in London to celebrate Black History Month through entertainment. Celebrities like Tinchy Stryder and KAT B came from far and wide to take part in an incredible, and culturally significant occasion.

If you’re thinking MOBO, that was just the after-party! Cos the real deal took place at Oceana, Kingston, and featured a whole line up of music artists, DJs, presenters, poets and, of course, Youth Unlimited! We caught up with the stars back stage to find out what Black History means to them. Unfortunately, cos KAT B spoke so much, we don’t actually have room for the full interviews! But don’t worry you can find them at www.younglivin.org.uk.

Tinchy Stryder

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one of the biggest events of the year

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A BLACK HISTORY MONTH EVENT

Yeah, cos when you learn the history of hip-hop – how it started and everything – it was a way for them to talk back against what was ruling them, through like, music and battling and whatever. It’s deep! It’s important to know where you come from.

Best Kept Secret

People without a knowledge of their history, are like trees without roots!

DJ Sticky

I think days like today are helpful because it’s about awareness. That’s my job I feel, musically, is to make people aware of multiculturalism.

KAT B

So one day I was at home and my mum told me “get out the house and do something!” – so I did! If you want to do something, you’ve always got to be practicing, and you’ve always got to be in it.

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We would like to say a big thank you to all of the entertainers especially Robin Walker from Black History Studies who graced the event with his wealth of knowledge on black history. If you’re interested in black history visit www.blackhistorystudies.co.uk. All in all the day was massive success, and a great opportunity to discover more about black history and culture, but not only that, to realise just how deep our roots go, and how important they are to us. Interviews by Joni, Ramanan, Phil, Sarah and Aylon

Photos by Sebastian, Nan and Jake


ALTERNATIVES TO UNI These guys obviously never thought about alternatives...

Artwork by Sebastian Santa-Maria

I’m in the last year of my school career, and the most common question I probably ask or get asked is probably, ‘So, where are you going to university?’ But then one person I asked turned the question straight back at me, asking,

‘What makes you think I’m going to uni?’ I realised the truth: not everyone will want to go on and do another three years of learning. So what are the other options out there for people who feel university isn’t for them? I certainly know that I was very ill informed on any alternatives, for me it seemed that university was the only pathway there was. What with my sister, cousins, parents and friends all going to university I didn’t even look at other options. If you think that university is not for you then you could be right and you should not be pressured into continued academic study if you won’t enjoy it.

Here are a few alterna ves...

Get a job

The most immediately obvious option is to go out and get a job. This is a good option if you want to gain independence, start to live by yourself and earn your own money. My advice for you is to look into jobs that can provide you with the opportunity for promotion, after all, in ten years time, you don’t want to be doing and earning exactly the same. You could get a job by finding out if your college or school has any links with companies, or send your CV off to companies. You never know, you might be what they are looking for. Alternatively there are always vacancies advertised on the web or in local and national papers.

Appren ceship

Apprenticeship is another option. This is where you combine a paid job with continued learning. This is a great opportunity to earn a bit of money but still gain more qualifications which can be used in the job at hand. The good thing about being an apprentice is that once finished, you can start earning more money as you are now qualified and the company you did your apprenticeship with might be interested in employing you full time.

Alternatives to Uni

Take a year out

There’s always the option of a year out, and it’s not just for those who don’t know what they want to do! A year out can give you time to earn some money before you later decide to go back to training, or it can be a very worth while time of broadening your experiences through voluntary work either at home or abroad, or travelling.

Stay at college

The last option that I’m going to look at is staying on at college and doing an extra year of qualifications. These qualifications can be anything from intensive A-levels, to foundation courses or a BTEC. All of these will help with job applications in the future. I hope that I have given you some more options to think about, instead of just going to boring old uni. The best person to talk to about the list of options available to you is your Connexions PA in school or college, everywhere should have one. Whatever you decide to do, make sure that you enjoy it and have fun along the way.

Lucie Parkinson

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R E G N I ? G A I B O H P Ginger Phobia

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he UK has one of the highest population percentages of redheads in the world, but words like ‘ginger’ and ‘ginga’ still roll off the tongue towards those gifted with this follicle rarity. Is it all just a bit of red-blooded fun or has Britain got ginger phobia? The persecution of those with red, auburn or ginger hair is not a modern condition and has persisted throughout history and around the world. Just as often as redheads have been discriminated against they have also been upheld and praised. Socially, redheads have been stereotyped as being fiery, hot tempered and overtly sexual, and a l t hough it is clear that the way we act is not attributed to hair colour, history’s most famous ‘gingers’ have helped to promote these ideas. As early as the ancient Egyptians t h e r e i s e v i d e n c e of Cleopatra dying her hair red, continuing to impress redheaded stereotypes upon all those aware of her volatile nature and political prowess. A more recent and recognisable redhead is our own home grown Queen Elizabeth I who popularised red hair throughout 16th Century Britain. Even modern media has been affected by the recent influx of redheaded style icons

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such as Lily Cole, Axl Rose and Nicola Roberts inspiring people across the world to reach for the dye bottle. However, whilst many famous redheads have inspired us, the everyday redhead on the street still faces some ridiculous and shocking challenges. In 2003 a 20 year old was stabbed in the back for being ‘ginger’ and in 2007 a family of redheads in Newcastle were forced to move home after being targeted by neighbours for their hair colour. In a world preoccupied

‘Why are people with red hair targeted? with political correctness and protecting the rights of people regardless of race, age or size, it is shocking to see a form of discrimination such as this overlooked by organisations like the Commission for Racial Equality, even though most people with red hair will experience anything from timid taunts to full blown violence throughout their lifetime. The question is why are people with red hair targeted? The simple truth is

that only 1 to 2% of the population is born with red hair, making them a minority. Throughout history society has victimised minorities. In other words, we, on a subconscious level, fear what is different and will victimise those who are different in any way to make ourselves feel better. As well as this, the victimisation and discrimination of redheads is still a crime largely beyond the reach of the law and until such time as it is recognised as unacceptable it will continue to be an issue. Hate shouldn’t be a follicle matter and only we can stand up for the rights of those different to us, not just redheads but anyone who is born a little different to the norm - and isn’t everyone in their own way a little different? If we were all the same life would be horrifically boring so why not praise the differences between us? Red hair is rare and beautiful and anyone who targets those with it are most likely expressing a form of jealousy or, at the very least, showing that they have low self esteem that can only be improved by attempting to bring others down. So next time you go to use the ‘G’ word ask yourself, have I got ginger phobia?

Amy Solman

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Isle of Wight Festival

Isle of Wight Festival Festivals are brilliant!

Happily, this is a fact that is slowly winding its way through society. Over the past few years, events like Glastonbury and Reading have become more and more popular and widely publicised – remember the rush for 2007 sell-out Glastonbury tickets? Reading sold out quickly this year, and Amy Winehouse punching someone in the audience was all over the news the morning after it happened at Glastonbury 2008. But it seems that sometimes the smaller festivals are forgotten, which is a shame. In June this year I went to the Isle of Wight 2008 festival, where the headliners were the Kaiser Chiefs, the Sex Pistols and The Police. And, as I mentioned earlier, it was brilliant. Weather wise, we were lucky. Despite the huge rainclouds that gathered above our heads and threatened a downpour every other minute, the only time it rained

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REVIEW

was on Thursday afternoon as we arrived. It seems, in fact, that the Isle of Wight festival is blessed; it has escaped rain – real rain, the sort that causes the infamous mudbaths at Glastonbury – for the past five years. But the Isle of Wight is a fantastic festival for other reasons, too. Regarding purely the area it covers, it is a reasonably small festival, which gives it a close and friendly atmosphere that you might not find at somewhere like Reading.

You’re only young once.

Although smaller than Reading or Glastonbury, it still packs a punch with two big stages, the main stage and the Big Top, plenty of food stalls, dodgems, clothes and accessories stalls, little tented cafés and dance tents that stay open till the early hours of the morning for a bit of a rave. We were lucky with our

field, too. Apparently in ‘White 2’ we had the lowest number of crimes across the entire site. But, of course, the main reason you go to a festival is to enjoy the music, and we certainly did. The headliners were all a bit of a disappointment, especially the Sex Pistols; once fresh and angry, now moaning old men far beyond their time. The other good thing about festivals is that you get a chance to see bands or artists you’d never have thought of or simply dismissed before, but to my surprise, KT Tunstall and Newton Faulkner were both excellent. Less to my surprise, Scouting for Girls were not. There’s little else to say, except this: you’re only young once. If your parents will allow you, and if you can afford it, get yourself to a festival at least once and enjoy yourself.

Vicki Exworthy


O U Y E AR S

tretch marks, as horrible as they are, are natural and there is little you can really do about them. Although here I have kindly listed ways in which you can seek to get rid of or at least make these dreaded marks less noticeable.

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Stretch marks appear when a person grows or gains weight really quickly over a short period of time. Due to the sudden change, that person may get fine lines on the body called stretch marks. Although the skin is

RED OF SCA

Stretch Marks

usually fairly elastic, when it’s overstretched, the normal production of collagen (the fibrous protein constituent of bone, cartilage, tendon, and other connective tissue) is disrupted and scars form as a result. These scars may show up at first as reddish or purplish lines that appear indented and have a different texture from the surrounding skin. Fortunately, stretch marks often turn lighter and almost disappear over time. (This fact is little consolation if you plan to spend most of your summer in a bikini!)

So who gets stretch marks? You? If you’re noticing stretch marks on your body, you’re not alone! Stretch marks are a normal part of puberty for most teenagers. If you don’t have any you are VERY lucky! Most girls and women have stretch marks, which tend to show up on the breasts, thighs, hips, and bum. Many women get them during pregnancy. Although these dreaded marks are more common in girls, guys can get stretch marks too. People who are obese (very overweight) often have stretch marks due to rapid

weight gain and stretching of the skin. Bodybuilders are also prone to stretch marks because of the changes that bodybuilding can produce. Stretch marks also may occur if a person uses steroidcontaining skin-creams or ointments (such as hydrocortisone, a steroid hormone) for more than a few weeks, or has to take high doses of oral corticosteroids for months or longer. Ways to make stretch marks less noticeable Some people find that sunless tanning treatments such as over-the-counter lotions and sprays and in-salon types of treatments can help cover up stretch marks. However, don’t think that you could just hop onto a sun bed because stretch marks themselves are less likely to tan and in the long run you’ll just damage your skin more! Buy body makeup matched to the tone of your skin that can make stretch marks all but invisible. Although some manufacturers make their cover-up products water-resistant, makeup may not be the best solution if you’ll be spending a lot of time in the water. Use current fashion to your advantage. There are many styles of clothing for the summer and beach that are

both fashionable and also just happen to hide stretch marks. Boy-cut shorts are great at hiding your bum and upper thighs. Use creams and other skin products that contain shea butter whose properties are known especially for its cosmetic properties as a moisturiser and emollient. Shea butter is marketed as being effective at treating the following conditions: fading scars, eczema, burns, rashes, acne, severely dry skin,

Stretch marks are a normal part of puberty for most teenagers.

dermatologist (a doctor who specializes in treating skin problems) or plastic surgeon. Go see one if you’re really troubled. These doctors may use one of many types of treatments - from actual surgery to techniques such as microdermabrasion (a procedure that removes the top layer of skin via crystals revealing new and healthier skin beneath) and laser treatment to reduce the appearance of stretch marks. Unfortunately, these techniques are expensive and are not usually recommended for people in their teenage years as they haven’t finished growing and their stretch marks will probably diminish over time anyway (let’s hope!).

Nan Pancoast

blemishes, dark spots, skin discolorations, chapped lips, stretch marks and wrinkles. Although there are tons of creams and other skin products on the market which claim to eliminate stretch marks, the truth is that most of them are ineffective and often costly. A sad fact is that you can’t make stretch marks go away entirely without the help of a

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ARE YOU INTERESTED IN... GRAPHIC DESIGN PHOTOGRAPHY WRITING ART JOURNALISM DISTRIBUTING MODELLING

you would like Alternatively, if s to publish, le tic ar to send us s e email addres send them to th , rant to us, us below! Write to OO SDVV LW RQ WR ZH¡ LQIRUP XV DQG the world!

Wednesday evenings, 6.30 to 9.00pm Devon Way Centre, Devon Way, Chessington KT9 2RJ Contact Nikki King (Youth Worker) Email: nikki.king@rbk.kingston.gov.uk Phone or text: 07795 813 052 Phone: 020 8547 6791 Download the latest issue at www.younglivin.org.uk

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*shudder*

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eet. Feet are to me, like weird looking hands and are, to be frank; EWWWW. Although I hate to admit it, I don’t really want to be walking on stumps so I should pay attention to my feet even if they do look really weird‌. Anyway, just because feet are closest to the ground and are walked on everyday they are more likely to get dirtier, dryer and rougher than any other part of our body. Also because they aren’t really seen, people often neglect foot health leaving their feet to turn even more disgusting! Feet need just as much TLC as any other part of our body. Proper foot care is essential for healthy, painless feet, and should be as much a part of your daily routine as brushing your teeth. It’s never too early or too late to start caring for your feet, and there’s a lot you can do for feet. As much as I hate feet, their health is important. So here are a few good tips for having healthy feet: Wash your feet every day in warm soapy water (don’t soak them, as this might destroy the natural oils) a n d dry them thoroughly, especially between the toes. If your skin is dry, apply moisturising cream all over the foot,

except for between the toes.

Lightly apply a foot powder.

Remove hard skin gently with a pumice stone, but not if it is over a bony area or joint. If this is the case, or if the hard skin is painful, consult a registered chiropodist (someone who deals with the diagnosis, treatment, and prevention of diseases of the human foot) or podiatrist (a ‘foot doctor’).

Trim your toe nails regularly, using proper nail clippers. Cut straight across, not too short, and not down at the corners as this can lead to in-growing nails. Keep feet warm, and exercise to improve circulation. Always wear the right shoe for the job. Seek prompt treatment for burns, cuts and breaks in the skin, and for any unusual changes in colour or temperature. This is particularly important if you have diabetes. If your feet hurt, something is wrong! You can also prevent foot problems before they occur b y v i s i t i n g a registered chiropodist or podiatrist for advice on how to keep your feet

healthy.

Nan Pancoast

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DMYP Interview

ALBERT SIMANGO INTERVIEW:

DEPUTY MEMBER OF YOUTH PARLIAMENT

T

hroughout November, Kingston Youth Council, better known as KYC, asked students in every secondary school in the borough to vote for their new Member of Youth Parliament (MYP). Maybe you, or someone you know, was running for this position. But why bother? What is the point of an MYP? We called in Kingston's current Deputy MYP (DMYP), Albert Simango, who attends Coombe Sixth Form, to find out more.

‘There are no set roles in being a DMYP,’ Albert explains, ‘it’s what you make out of it. If I wanted to, I could just sit around and do nothing. But for me, being DMYP is about representing Kingston’s young people, and it’s something I work hard at. And it’s definitely a lot of hard work.’

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He’s not exaggerating about the hard work! As Kingston’s DMYP Albert’s time is well used with regular commitments: • Albert attends a monthly meeting with MYPs and DMYPs from all thirty-three boroughs of London, where they discuss the issues and solutions to issues facing young people today. • Kingston Youth Council meets once a month, where they debate issues, share opinions and views, and make sure these opinions and views are heard by people who can make the changes happen. • There is a four-day Annual Sitting of the UK Youth Parliament, where issues are further explored and solutions developed. • There is a regional (all the London Boroughs) residential to attend.

Being DMYP is about representing Kingston’s young people.

In May 2008 Albert, along with the rest of the UK Youth Parliament, went to Parliament to sit in the House of Lords Chamber and decide what the UKYP’s three national campaigns would be for this year. This was, in fact, an historic event, as up until now none other than the Lords themselves have ever been allowed to debate in the House. Albert is planning to meet Boris Johnson, too, to discuss how London’s mayor perceives the city’s young people. On top of all this, Albert also has his own life to

live, including a part-time job and his A-Level studies. So we had to ask him, ‘If it’s so much hard work, why bother?’

It’s about being listened to.

‘You learn a lot, you develop, you gain more confidence, more self-esteem. It’s a great experience; you get to travel lots, you get to meet a lot of people.’ He grins. ‘I’ve met lots of nice girls. But it’s more than that – it’s about being listened to, knowing that you can influence change. There’s a sense of belonging to something bigger, realising that there’s a world outside just your home or school or town, and that you can change it. It changes the way people perceive you too, people are interested in this and you get responsibilities and respect.’

It does sound good, but surely there are problems too? ‘It’s a lot of work, if you’re willing to do it well, but it’s worth it. Anyone that wants to do it should go for it now – just put yourself forward, I never thought I’d be able to, but look at me now. I suppose one thing to remember is that you’re not just left standing, the staff are brilliant, the UKYP staff and Kingston’s youth workers give you so much support. So, it’s good. It could get harder, though, as it gets more popular, and it’s tough already but… the more popular it is the prouder you are to say: I am, or once was, an MYP.’

Vicki Exworthy and Alex Stone

To find out more about the MYP Election, visit www.younglivin.org.uk/kyc

Youth Parliament National Campaigns On 2nd May 2008 the UK Youth Parliament met to discuss what the three national campaigns they would be fighting this year were.

So, what did our members of Youth Parliament decide to focus on as campaigns for 2008? 1. Your Future, Your World, Your Fight: 490 votes This campaign is about the environment, why it’s such a huge issue and what we can do to fight climate change. After all, we’re the ones who have to grow up in a world that seems to be falling apart as we speak. 2. National transport card for young people: 425 votes Last year’s ‘Faresfair’ campaign was decided to be worthy of further attention, and though it seems to be lacking a snappy title for 2008, the idea is the same. Prices for public transport vary massively across the country,

as does the age at which we have to pay ‘adult’ transport fares; some say 18, some 16, some 14… you get the picture. While this is slightly less important to us in London, where most young people get free bus travel with their Oyster card, it can be a much bigger problem for young people in other areas. On the flipside for us Londoners, London train fares are among the highest in the world, so this is definitely a campaign worth fighting for. 3. Abolish university tuition fees: 252 votes Or at least reduce them, please… While there are major advantages in going to university – the better educated you are, the more you’re likely to earn, the social life, the independence – university comes with a massive problem attached: debt. Upon leaving university, Britain’s average student is already £17,000 in debt and some people even reach £25,000. While you don’t have to pay it back until you’re earning, that’s still a lot of money.

Youth Parliament

So, what does the UKYP intend to do about all this?

Ideas are all very good, but a plan of action is, of course, even better. Happily, they’ve got one. Each MYP will email their Member of Parliament, asking them to take action at Westminster on our behalf. They will keep emailing or writing letters until someone responds. They also intend to work with the local media to help raise awareness and to inform their friends about the campaign.

Get Involved!

If these issues matter to you, you don’t need to be involved with your local youth council to add your voice to the campaigns. You can take action by going to the UK Youth Parliament website and sign the petitions or email ministers to register your voice and support, too. Go to ukyouthparliament.org.uk to • Sign petitions and email MPs about the campaigns. • Watch the DVD of the House of Lords Debate. • Read about what our members discussed and did at the Annual Sitting. Finally, if you want to vote and your school or youth centre isn’t involved, get your citizenship teacher or youth worker to contact Kingston Youth Service about it. They should contact Graham Mann-Smith at graham.mannsmith@rbk.kingston.gov.uk.

Vicki Exworthy

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EL ! U IEV E IN YO

Self Esteem

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Stop thinking negative thoughts about yourself! When you are being too critical, outweigh it by finding something positive about yourself. Aim for accomplishments rather than perfection! It’s not to say don’t aim high, but it is to say don’t aim for the stars and get burnt because it’s unrealistic. Some people become paralysed by perfection because they’re always holding back until they are satisfied. Instead of doing this, just go for it!

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Not feeling so good about you?

Would rather be like someone else? Have a look at our top ten tips for improving your self esteem!

Set goals! Think about what you'd like to accomplish realistically, and make a plan for how to do it.

View mistakes as learning opportunities! Accept that you will make mistakes because everyone does. Remember: mistakes are part of learning. Try new things! Experiment with different activities that will help you get in touch with your talents even if you think that it’s not your thing. You’ll never know that you have a talent in that certain aspect of life until you try! Sports, art, music – any sort of creativity is a great way to express yourself and find something you’re good at. Recognise what you can change and what you can't! If it's something you can't change (i.e. your height), then start to work toward loving yourself the way you are. There’s no sense in getting hung up over something that you can’t change!

Take pride in your opinions and ideas! Don't be afraid to voice them and never think that people don’t want to hear them. (And if they really don’t… stuff them! They shouldn’t be so closed minded.) Make a contribution! Help wherever you can. Feeling like you're making a difference and that your help is valued can do wonders to improve self-esteem. Exercise! Exercise releases chemicals in the brain called endorphins, which relieve stress and pain, and promote happiness, allowing you to be healthier and happier. Have fun! Enjoy spending time with the people you care about and doing the things you love.

Nan Pancoast

Clothes BY TOPMAN


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Size Zero

o blindly step into the conundrum of size zero the fashion world’s consensus of ‘perfection’, one would need to know the facts behind this tangle of myths. In the UK there is no such thing as a size zero; it’s an Americanism. Here we associate size zero with size four, and yes, you have to be tiny to fit into it!

Most clothes made by designers are a UK size eight, which seems to be large compared to the ideological size four. But considering that the average woman in the UK is a size fourteen, this is certainly not the case! Think Marilyn Monroe instead of Victoria Beckham. Every model at some point or another would probably feel inadequate or embarrassed if they ever struggled to fit their waif-like figure into a sample size. Erin O’Connor, a top British model, when famously interviewed said: “In 10 years of modelling, I have never been asked to lose weight, but there have been incidents of discomfort because I didn’t fit well into a sample size”. She goes on to say, “My job is to make clothes come alive, and that’s got more to do with my personality than it has to do with my Body Mass Index (BMI); which for the record, is comfortably over the minimum set by Madrid Fashion Week. My dress size is between ten and twelve.” So why are models like Erin boycotted by young people like ourselves - the people most influenced by media and fashion? Surely she would be

a good role model? My guess is that the support of the fashion followers veers towards whatever and whomever the fashion industry advocates and idolises. So if models like Erin O’Connor and Lily Cole (who was slaughtered in the papers during London Fashion Week for being too thin, which was later found to be untrue) aren’t actually a size zero, and are not the ones at fault, but merely the victims of media pressure, then who is? Who are these tiny models that need saving and from whom ‘impressionable young people’ like ourselves need saving?

“At 21 years of age, she weighed 6st.”

One was Brazilian model, Ana Carolina Reston, who died in November 2006, as a result of anorexia. Sources in the press stated that at 21 years of age, she weighed 6st. at 5”8 after living off a diet of apples and tomatoes. The media vultures advocate thinness, yet gave bad press to this girl when she died of it. So when does the desire to be thin go too far? One example of this was Luisel Ramos, a 22 year old Uruguayan model who died of a heart attack after stepping off the catwalk at the Uruguayan Fashion Week that she helped co-ordinate. As a result of her death, Madrid Fashion Week made headlines when it decided to ban models with a BMI of less than 18. (BMI is measured

by weight divided by height squared).

Many followed this example, such as Mario Roselli, head of the National Chamber for Italian Fashion (CNMI) and Giovanna Melandria, Minister for youth policies, who have drawn up a charter signed by a multitude of fashion houses, whose names were not disclosed. This charter stated that any model wanting to step on the catwalk will require proof of good health.

This debate over thin models is an age old fight and yet nothing has really changed, apart from the medical advancements and the knowledge that the ‘thin’ look is a way to certain death. However this threat does not feature in the majority of the fashion industry’s narcissistic reflection that masochism is the price of the ‘perfect woman’, so is this really a good example to follow? Long gone are the days when models danced eagerly up the catwalk, symbols of good health, all shapes and sizes, models such as Jerry Hall and Pat Cleveland. By the early nineties, the fashion industry had begun to change shape, promoting the heroin-chic look made famous by Kate Moss. In 1996 there was public outcry over pictures of models Trish Goff and Annie Morton in Vogue, looking particularly thin. It’s got to the point where, today, you can’t be a model unless you’re at least 5”9 and weigh less than your Prada handbag!

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• Lack of calcium, which may cause osteoporosis • Interrupted or no periods BMI measurements: Severely underweight: <16.5 Underweight: 16.5-18.5 Normal: 18.5-25 Overweight: 25-30 Obese: 30-35 Clinically obese: 35-40 Morbidly obese: >40

Information Dangers associated with dieting: • An irregular heartbeat that can lead to heart failure and death • Dehydration • Kidney stone formation and kidney failure • Weakness because of muscle wasting • Constipation • Growth of fine downy hair on the face and arms

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Beat: 0845 634 1414 (weekdays 10.30am to 8.30pm, Saturdays 1pm to 4.30pm www.b-eat.co.uk Provides advice and support for anyone with an eating disorder including anorexia and bulimia nervosa. National Centre for Eating Disorders: www.eating-disorders.org.uk Provides private counselling for compulsive dieters and anyone with an eating disorder including obesity, anorexia, bulimia and binge eating. For information on calculating your body mass index go to www.younglivin.org.uk/bmi Don’t forget BMI measurements are only a guideline though, not the be all and end all of good health. If you’re worried about being under or overweight go to your doctor or school nurse.

Allysia Wood

Artwork by Sebastian Santa-Maria

SOME INFO

So here’s an idea or maybe more a case of wishful thinking: we shouldn’t have to say who’s too thin or too fat to walk the catwalk. Nor should we send out the message that anyone over a size eight isn’t skinny enough to look good in clothes. There’s no simple solution, b u t t h e r e i s t h i s ; the industry thinks deeply when it comes to creating, fostering, admiring, promoting, photographing and selling designer creations – think of Gareth Pugh’s PVC and pompoms. Surely it would benefit us to do the same when it comes to the girls modelling them and shaping society’s young fashionistas.

Helpline numbers: NHS direct: 0845 46 47 (24 hour service) www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk Offers information on healthy eating.


HOW AND WHY I G

ROMANIA

Romania

My friend Alix told me about the trip about a month before they were due to leave. I had no idea what Romania was like or what we’d be doing there.

I asked myself – what could this trip do for me?

MAKING ADV ENTURE POSS I

Over the last year, 9 young people aged between 14-17 and 3 youth workers united to create ‘MAP’ - Making Adventures Possible. Young people came from around the borough, and together we prepared ourselves for a two week trip to Romania, in August 2008. Why? To explore the differences between young people in the UK and those in another part of the world.

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BLE

It was also an amazing opportunity to explore the culture and lifestyle of a country that has only recently joined the EU and is still recovering from the effects of communism. But not only did we learn about other people, we were all surprised to learn loads about ourselves. A lot of effort went into organising this trip, but the rewards far outweighed the hard work. It was nothing short of life-changing, and this is my personal experience of the trip…

BUCHARES

T

As we arrived in the capital, Bucharest, it was clear that communism has left its mark. It was dull, grey and sparse, but the closer we got to the main centre, the more energy I felt in the atmosphere. One thing I remember not seeing, though, was young people. Maybe I just wasn’t looking closely enough? Then, as we clumbered off the bus and into the metro, I couldn’t help but notice the looks the local people were giving us. I get the feeling they weren’t used to seeing such a mixed range of cultures together in one group. Like London, Romania has its nice parts and its shabby parts. We were in the shabby part. We washed in sinks, there were no decent mattresses and the TV didn't work. Already I was missing home and longed for a hot shower. While in Bucharest we visited a children’s hospital and the local youth centre. This was a real preparation for the week we’d have ahead in Godinesti, where we’d be working with children.

OT INVOLVED

Maybe two weeks away from my family would give me a sense of independence? And I’d always wanted to play a part in developing youth culture today, I just never knew how. So when I heard about the project, I pushed my doubts aside and got involved.

The youth centre was simply a detached house that had been converted for youth work purposes. The children were polite and more than willing to answer our questions; one boy even shared his passion for ballet with us. Having a simple discussion with them gave us an understanding of being part of today’s youth culture and what an important part we will play in the future of our countries. However, despite developing good relationships with the local children, tensions had begun to rise within the MAP group. Before any serious divides or arguments broke out, we had to sit down to discuss the issues we had with each other. Although not easy, confronting the person who’d upset me really helped – and is something I wouldn’t have dreamt of doing back home. After a long, heated discussion, the problems were solved and that’s when we became more of a team than a group. That was my first growing point in Romania.

Romania

SETTING OFF

The morning we left was tough, saying goodbye to my mum proved harder than I thought. She hugged me tight; it’d be the last time I’d get a hug like that for a while. She hadn’t even left and I was missing her already.

Like London, Romania has its nice parts and its shabby parts. We were in the shabby part.

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Romania

Romania

THE TRIP TO BACAU

The day we travelled to Bacau felt like one of the longest. Four hours we sat in stuffy, compact train compartments. Apart from sleeping, I quietly sat and watched the world go by. My thoughts drifted in and out of the open window as I reflected on my first few days, and looked forward to discovering what the rest of the trip had in store. When we arrived were greeted by Gabi, the Romanian leader, who kindly helped load our luggage into the cars. Bacau was the Miami of Romania. I saw young people strolling around, looking typically hip. There were more shops than in Bucharest too; it was so much more accessible. The motel we stayed in was paradise compared to the hostel, with hot showers and comfortable beds, it felt so much closer to home. Later that evening we met with Romanian youth volunteers, aged 15-17. Their English was excellent; I thought we’d all have communication problems because of the language ‘barrier’. We sat in mixed groups and discussed what it was like being a young person in the UK. That evening we headed to the town centre for a gig. We were surrounded by Romanian teens and together we did what all teenagers do best - dance, laugh and have a good time.

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WHAT I LEARNT

GODINESTI

The next day we arrived at Godinesti. The countryside was beautiful and scattered with small houses, wells and trees. The youth centre, apart from being bright orange, was quite basic. Our bedroom was a small room with a sink and a cupboard. We’d only been there for a few hours but I was beginning to find it hard.

They looked at us as if we were from a different world

For the rest of the week we spent our days playing with the kids and running the summer school. They loved the sports equipment we’d bought with us; volleyballs, tennis rackets and, of course, the Magicool spray and hand gel. They looked at us as if we were from a different world, but a world they longed to see. Among the children were three brothers; Vladut was the oldest, and as the days went on I built a particularly strong

LEAVING FOR BACAU bond with him. He and his brother once followed the youth volunteers to the hills where they sat playing with my hair and taking my hair clips. No, I couldn’t speak Romanian and they couldn’t speak English, but nevertheless, they’d hold my hand, give me hugs and tease me. That day spent with Vladut was probably the best of those five days, and to say I miss him is an understament. His younger brothers were just as sweet and I still have a vivid image of their cheeky grins. I don’t actually know whether they had parents or not. As we drove out of Godinesti I reflected on my time in the village with the children. I’d become used to the cold showers, plastic plates and cups; none of that mattered to me any more. It was the children that were the highlight of my day. I missed my family tremendously, though, because I knew that whenever I found things hard my mum’s arms were the only ones that could comfort me.

Vladut stayed with me from the second day right up to the moment the minibus left, but the children weren’t the only people I knew I’d miss when we left for England. After just a few days with the Romanian youth volunteers, we’d made great friends. Saying goodbye was especially emotional. The three brothers and a few girls, in particular, had played the biggest part of my time in the village and I long to return next year to see the same faces that put a smile on my own. When we arrived at Bacau, we spent more time with the youth volunteers evaluating our time in the village and comparing beliefs within the mixed group. Looking back, I really noticed a change in me over those five days.

Saying goodbye was especially emotional. B R A SO V

Brasov was by far the most beautiful part of Romania we visited, and was surrounded by mountains and greenery. And I'll never forget the day we were 2000 metres up a mountain, building human pyramids and lying in the sun. The previous couple of months, prior to going to Romania, had been rough, but on that day I felt at peace with myself. It was our last, and as I sat on the mountainside with my legs burning in the sunshine, I reflected back over each and every moment...

Despite the worries I’d had before the trip, I don’t regret going. It’s the longest I’ve spent away from my family and I was surprised by how hard I found it. I’ve discovered a new hidden love for children; their appreciation of our company made a real difference in me. I’d been a latecomer on this trip and hardly knew anyone from MAP, so not only did I bond with the Romanians but I also made new friends with people from my own country, my own town even.

The two weeks were hard; physically and emotionally. There were points where I felt extremely weak, proud, happy and appreciative of how good my life really was. I'd love to go back again, and maybe some day I will. It’ll take a lot of work and encouragement, but I know it’d all be worth it in the end. Not only did I learn about myself, I learnt about others too, from both England and Romania, which was the exact purpose of the trip. I feel more confident and more determined to play a bigger part in the youth culture of today. I like to think I’ve become a better person than I was before but I won’t know that until someone tests my confidence, patience, short temper, or maybe even my beliefs. If any of you ever come across an opportunity to make a difference to someone else, or to yourself, I strongly advise you to take it because it’s amazing what can happen in two weeks.

Joni Clarke

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Clothes by TOPSHOP and NEW LOOK

Smoothies

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Smoothies

The Good

The Bad

The Ugly

Ingredients: Strawberries Bananas Pineapple, Apple and Orange juice Yoghurt

Ingredients: Banana Kiwi Yoghurt Honey

Ingredients: Strawberries Yoghurt Orange juice

‘RUBY’

Appearance: Ruby red Taste: Fruity Pineappley Fluffy Foamy/light Refreshing Tip: If you want a strawberry milkshake then this is an excellent choice, but as an alternative you could use ice cream instead of the yoghurt and add ice.

‘HALLOWEEN SMOOTHIE’

Appearance: Luminous green Taste: Bananary Too thick Seedy Tip: It’s great to scare people with at Halloween or to be used as a substitute for yoghurt; we ended up eating it with spoons.

‘TOXIC PINK’

Appearance: Toxic pink Taste: Bitter Odd Tangy Light/thin Tip: If you love sour grapefruit smoothies this is a must for you (but bear in mind that this is a very marginal percentage of the population). For the other 99% of the world, honey is a good sweetener.

For more smoothie recipes visit www.younglivin.org.uk/smoothies

Why all this bother?

At first we couldn’t figure that out either, but with today’s headlines of child obesity and school dinners not being healthy enough we decided that it was well worth the effort and the risk of food poisoning (No-one actually died). Fruit smoothies contribute to our 5 a day, as well as getting us into the kitchen and taking some initiative into healthy eating. So we thought we’d give you tips on how to and how not to make them and thus ‘The good, the bad and the just plain ugly’ was born! Nan Pancoast and Allysia Wood

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Chinese and Black Black and Indian

Black and White

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Chinese and White

P

RACE?

eople who aren’t of a mixed race often label mixed race individuals with a variety of different terms, such as coloured, half-caste, or mixed. However, do these labels really mean anything? Or is being mixed raced much more personal than just a label?

At one extreme comes the ‘One Drop Rule’ theory, which is still used in the US today, says that anybody with even one drop of Black blood, however small or invisible, is simply considered Black. This theory dates back to the end of slavery and was designed to separate the American race into several segregated societies. Although this theory is still used by some people today; is it really fair to segregate each other and have other people decide our own opinions? This theory suggests that there is only one view, but in our modern multi-cultural society, we can clearly see that this is not the case.

Chinese and Black White and Indian

As mentioned before, this theory is still popular today. Let’s take US President Elect Barack Obama as an example of this rule. The main reason for his popularity is because he is the first “Black” president of the United States. This thought is often disliked by conservative southern whites in America, who didn’t vote for him not because of his policies, but because of his heritage. The fact that his mother was 100% White, which makes him as White as

he is Black, is totally irrelevant; because his father was African, to these people and the American media, he is labelled as “Black”.

The case of Barack Obama is relevant in normal society, where mixed race people are often referred to as their minority race, especially if they have African blood. However, for mixed race people themselves, the label of being Black, White or Asian doesn’t represent what they truly feel inside…

I

don’t see myself being one or the other… instead as both We asked some people of mixed race to give us their opinions: “I am half Chinese and half English; my mum is from Beijing in China, and my Dad is originally from Yorkshire, but moved to London in his thirties. I don’t see myself being one or the other… instead as both (clichéd I know). Being mixed race definitely has its positives. For example, having a Chinese mother enables me to learn Chinese, and after spending time overseas, I am essentially

Mixed Race fluent in Chinese. However, being half British, I find it easier to fit in and appear “normal” into “White” crowds, but I can still empathise with and be accepted by an Asian one. However, although I find that racism towards my Chinese half is very rare, I do get called names sometimes, such as ‘chink’, it makes me feel angry as I cannot see why people can’t be liberal and accept that being Chinese isn’t any worse than being White. Like I said though, it is rare, as London and its surrounding areas are generally accepting of different races and don’t tend to think ‘He’s Black/Asian, I don’t like him’.” As you can see, being mixed race is more complicated than choosing to be one race or another. It’s more about being a unique individual, benefiting from the best parts from each heritage, such as an ability to be accepted by different racial groups, and sometimes taking the burden, such as racism. If you would like to find out more about mixed heritage, visit: http://www.multipleheritage. co.uk/mix-d.html Or read “What Are You?” by Pearl Gaskins

FEELINGs?

Philip Ball and Sarah Cooper

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Organ Donation

Life after

DEATH?

Surely 18 is too young for a transplant! A few months ago I was at a festival and, well, you know how these things go, you get chatting and you make friends. One of the friends I made was called Lawrence and, at the age of 18, he’d already had a heart transplant – without which, he probably would have died. Someone out there left their heart, and maybe other organs too, to the NHS before they died; someone out there saved Lawrence’s life. It was a thought provoking conversation. Surely 18 is too young for a transplant? I thought transplants were for ‘other people’, older people, those whose bodies are on the verge of giving up, or whose bodies have come under too much pressure from drugs or alcohol? Apparently not. Even at our age, when we want to think we can go on forever, we can get ill as well. Anyone could be in need of a transplant tomorrow, but anyone could sign up for the organ donors register today.

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If someone I loved was suffering, I’d want the whole of the UK to sign up if it could save them.

Since talking to Lawrence, I decided to sign up, and have been asking friends and family to do the same. Why? Because I think it’s important, because I know that if someone I loved was suffering, possibly dying from a disease that could be solved by a transplant, I’d want the whole of the UK to sign up if it could save them, and I’m sure everyone else would feel the same. Plus, one of the notable points about being dead is that you’re not going anywhere, you really don’t need your heart, lungs or liver any more – but someone out there does.

Organ donation is an act of love and charity.

Really, it takes about five minutes. Maybe less. Simply go to uktransplant.org.uk or just put ‘nhs donor register’ (or something similar) into Google and follow the links. You can do everything online, it’s quick and easy and, although some people believe otherwise, there are no age limits to signing up. In addition, many of the major UK religions, including Christianity, Judaism, Islam and Buddhism have all issued statements saying that organ donation is an act of love and charity, and is therefore both acceptable and encouraged.

Organ Donation

Someday, you truly could save someone’s life. Once your application is complete, you get a little card and a letter through the post confirming your decision. More importantly, you get the knowledge that someday, you truly could save someone’s life. Check out www.uktransplant.org.uk Also, If you’re 17 and over and are interested in giving blood go to www.blood.co.uk.

Vicki Exworthy

Here are the facts:

e are about • Right now, ther t ing for a i a w 9,000 people n. o t i a r e p o t n a l p s n tra han 400 • Last year, more t for g i n i t a w d e i d e p eo p l nsplant. their operation/tra

han 900 • Last year, more t people were saved lant. following a transp

ransplants • Less than 3,000 t ar. y e a t u o d are carrie

t be easier • Signing up migh . k n than you thi

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The Rant

BOYS!

They act really sweet with you and then next thing you know they change their entire attitude to you. What’s the point? They can be so nice, as if they love you to the ends of the earth then they will look at any other girl that walks by who happens to have ‘nice’ tits or derriere. If they like you they should really show it and really mean it, not just mess around with your mind.

THE

Why do they sometimes act like such idiots?!

There are two ways guys seem to act: 1. They can be really protective or obsessed with you. (And come on, every girl needs their space.) 2. They will act as if they couldn’t care less about you and wander off and flirt with all the other girls. If they want to be your boyfriend they should act like it! It may seem like girls expect a lot but we just want a guy who can be the best they can be. Boys seem to think we want some impossible guy

RANT

but we really only want someone who isn’t so childish and can actually act the age he is. It can be cute when guys act childish but usually it just gets boring. Of course, we can’t accuse every boy of being like this, there are honourable exceptions, but only a few. Why do boys think we are so up ourselves? We’re not – we’re just girls and men should get used to the way we are. Otherwise, they can just cope on their own!

Jessica G

BOYS VERSUS GIRLS

GIRLS?

Do these questions sound familiar to you? Chances are that at some point in your life a girl has asked you these questions, and it is more than likely that whatever answers you gave simply got you into more trouble. You are often left believing that had you given the other answer, you could have averted disaster, but don’t be fooled into thinking it’s that easy; apparently you are expected to be a mind-reader. Here’s a thought – why don’t you just tell us what you want instead (seriously).

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“Why are you so immature?” “Why can’t you express emotion?”

Apparently we are emotionally constipated and that is a problem for girls, despite the fact that it has never been a problem for boys. According to girls we must be changed from our emotionally unavailable ways, although they will never attempt to see our point of view, this is probably the source of their nosiness.

Now it would be unfair to include all girls in this group, but let’s face it, most are guilty of this. However, all boys are accused of constantly ogling and checking-out other girls, which could be true in some

(maybe most) cases; but if you try to say that this stems from their own insecurities, then you will have absolutely confirmed their previous accusations and condemned yourself to a lecture (almost certainly about not treating women as objects). Remember boys, that no matter what the crime, no matter what the argument is about, it will always be our fault! Oh, and play with your balls as much as you want… but do it when girls aren’t looking!

Jake Stamps and Alex Stone

Artwork by Sebastian Santa-Maria

What is it with


Have you ever wondered what Police Officers are like off-duty? Have you wondered what they are like when they are not at work and what they do in their free time? Believe it or not, once the hat comes off and the cuffs get shut in the locker, they’re not much different to you and I. They eat, sleep, breathe, dream, wear the same clothes, have friends, socialise, get excited, get anxious, watch TV, play golf, shop, surf the net… …some even have a sense of humour! We met up with Dave and John, two police officers from Kingston, and tried to find out what they get up to out of work, who they are and what makes them tick. For my first question I asked Dave and John about their best and funniest arrests... Dave: It was so funny at the time. There were three or four girls who broke into a place that was being refurbished. When we got to the venue the girls started running to get away from us. But what was so funny was the fact that they ran through the end of the building that led them straight to our police van. So they walked into the van and sat down!

POLICEMEN

A DAY IN THE LIFE...

Policemen

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John: For me, it was an incident on Buckley Road. We followed a moped in the van; the young person on it had a couple of golf clubs in t h e b a g o n h i s b a c k. W e followed him through some houses and gardens, and through some car parks and he eventually

drove himself up into a shed, where we caught him! Do you keep arresting the same people over and over again? Dave: Yes we do, but they are in two categories; there are the young people aged 13-17 and the over 25’s. The gap seems to be the age where they think about what they’re doing.

“He shows us his scars”

What do you do to unwind after a hard day at work? Dave: Take the dog for a walk; watch some TV, sometimes I play squash or a bit of golf. John: Watch some TV, especially football.

Have you ever been assaulted whilst on the job? Dave: Yes (he shows us his scars) 10 years ago I was assaulted with a knife, I’ve also got a cigarette burn, a human bite and another knife scar. The second knife scar is there because the trainee nurse forgot to give me some anaesthetic before stitching it. John: Nothing on duty, no. Do your family and friends ever make jokes because of your work? Dave: My family don’t but my friends do sometimes. I don’t think they mean to be horrible though.

If someone makes an inappropriate joke are you ever tempted to laugh? Dave: All the time (they both laugh) in work life you have to be 100% professional but when I’m not at work I end up joining in. John: Yes, it’s just the jokes that they come out with and the situations you find yourself in. Dave: In this job you have to laugh or things will end up getting to you.

“..We now engage with more young people” Do you sometimes find it hard to obey the law?

Dave: No, no temptations. I have been in a situation where I have found £500,000 but wasn’t tempted to take it, so I handed it in. It’s a life changing decision if you take it. What do you like to watch on TV? Dave: 1930’s and 40’s black and white gangster movies. John: I’m a big movie fan, same as Dave and lots of 70’s films. Do you ever find yourself commenting on what police actors do wrong in films or on TV? Dave: I don’t watch the Bill

Police Interview

anymore because of it.

If you weren’t a policeman what would you be? Dave: A builder John: An actor How do you feel arresting young people? Dave: I don’t really distinguish between young people and adults. If it’s a teenager and they do something serious then they need to be arrested. How many young people do you arrest a month? Dave: Very few. Our roles have changed over the years and we now engage more with the young people. We also meet with the residents to try and get them to see it’s not all young people that break the law; it’s only a small group. Do you think there’s a problem with young people today? John: Parents don’t take as much of an interest as they used to, mine always knew more or less what I was doing. The idea of community has also slipped away. Dave: When I was growing up, during a school week I remember about me and 20 of my mates going to the park to play football, that doesn’t seem to happen anymore. Once upon a time children on the street used to be a reflection of their parents but now that’s not the case, so parents aren’t affected by their children’s behaviour.

Jake Stamps

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Christmas

D

WACKY

o you have a friend or family member who you just can’t buy for? Have you spent weeks up until Christmas trying to come up with the perfect gift, only to have to grab something at random from the shelves on Christmas Eve? What do you get for the person who seems to have everything? Well here at Youth Unlimited we seek to find the answer. Here are some weird and ‘wacky’ gifts that you may not have thought of at all when on your annual Christmas shopping spree:

CHRISTMAS IDEAS! Tattoo sleeves:

For all your friends who want tattoos, but who are too scared to go under the needle; the tattoo sleeve provides a convincing fake at least, coming in a wide range of different patterns and styles.

The 7-foot tall upside-down Christmas tree:

Tired of the same monotonous Christmas tree? Weird up your Christmas with this novel, pre-lit, inverted centre-piece.

The Eco-Button:

For all your evironmentally conscious friends, this present is perfect. Over

700,000 tonnes of carbon per year is wasted in the UK by people leaving TVs and Computers on standby. When you connect up the Eco-button to a device, you can instantly set your machine to eco-mode at the touch of a button.

Remote control Helicopters:

Have epic aerial battles in your living room, using these laser-mounted, sky-challenger remote controlled helicopters.

Oidz:

Appearing to be two strange, metallic eggs, the Oidz are noisy, weird and utterly addictive. Their unique magnetic stunts will mesmerize you, and the sounds the make will make you think they’re from outer space.

Chocolate-covered Scorpions:

Underwater Camera Goggles:

If you have friends who love life under the sea, then these could be perfect for them. A five mega-pixel video camera, with a 16 Mb memory card, and a set of goggles rolled into one. Perfect for the aquatic explorer.

Only for the courageous and adventurous among your friends. These scorpions are deep-fried and smothered in milk chocolate. If you’re looking for food with a bit of sting to it, these are perfect.

Control-your-partner remote: Condom cap:

It’s a cap shaped like a giant condom, enough said.

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Ladies/men, are you tired of your boyfriend/girlfriend? Well fear not; with the Control-a-man/woman remote you can take control of your love-life. No batteries required – powered by positive thinking! Alex Stone

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I SEE YOU LOOKING... “Many of the signs we make are subconscious, because flirting and body signals go back to when attracting the best mate possible to have strong offspring with was essential to the survival of our genes”

W

hat are you like when you see the girl or boy of your dreams across the room? Personally when someone catches my eye I become ridiculously smiley and giggly around said bloke, alerting my friends and probably most people around us to my target. Not only

40

does this result in lots of teasing from my so-called mates but it also means I am forced to work extra hard to make this guy think I think he is something special and convince him

that I don’t normally have trouble forming coherent sentences. I am also forced to flirt my heart out or make the first move as most of the time he is either too nervous to do it himself or he really has no idea how to read the signals. Many of the signs we make are subconscious, because flirting and body signals go back to when attracting the best mate possible to have strong offspring with was essential to the survival of our genes. This is true whether you are 15 or 50 (and whether or not you are looking to have children at this very moment in time). The origins of this human behaviour stem from when we first stood on two legs and many are the same in different cultures across the world. Most scientists agree it takes between 90 seconds and 4 minutes to decide if we fancy someone, but generally the attraction has nothing to do with what they are saying. Most of the impression we get from someone is through their body language; how they are standing; whether their arms are crossed etc; whilst

the tone, speed and changes in their voice are also important. Of course knowing that you fancy them is the easy part. Finding out if the feeling is reciprocated, and the message you are sending them in return, both fall in to the minefield that is flirting and body language. Girls: How To Know If He’s Interested: Boys flirt with their eyes; if they look from one of your eyes to the other and then down to your mouth in a triangular movement you may well be in with a

chance. He keeps his attention on you; especially in a group situation, if a boy singles you out for conversation and entertainment he obviously wants to hear more.... He’ll try to show how masculine he his; usually this results in him flexing his muscles or a race/competition so he can show you how much better he is than any other guy there. Guys: What to Look Out

For: Playing with her hair; when us girls are nervous we tend to twist our hair round our fingers, or keep changing its style to draw your attention to any soft skin. She draws your attention to her lips; if she’s biting her lip or touching them while in conversation with you, she could be hoping there is some kissing in your future (I always found having in a pen in my mouth or running my finger across them works wonders). She leans into you when you talk; she wants you to know you have her undivided attention, especially if she keeps eye contact. Make Yourself Look Attractive If you think the signals are a bit too much there are some easier ways to just generally seem more attractive to that person you like: Act Confident! When you walk with your head up and strut your stuff (if in heels) your confidence comes across quickly and draws the attention of those around you. Don’t sit in a corner with your arms crossed! This stance makes you seem closed off and defensive, especially if accompanied by a sour look. Smile! Smiling generally makes you look “bright eyed and bushy tailed” and ready Continued on next page

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to chat. Smiling projects friendliness and everyone wants to talk to someone like that. Dress to show off your assets! If you think your legs are something special wear heels and skinny jeans to make them look extra long (as Gok always tells us) or just wear a colour which people say you look good in. As for boys making a bit of an effort goes a long way; a shirt and jeans is smart casual and looks good on everyone. Be safe: If you finally get your date here are some helpful hints

to make sure you stay safe: Arrange to meet for coffee or lunch rather than dinner – not only are you safer during the day but if it’s not going so well it’s easier to have an excuse to leave. Stick to an area that’s well lit and busy – it’s good to go somewhere you know well where there will be people around who can identify who you’re with. Chatting to the staff will show you know people there. Don’t invite strangers to your home – and don’t go to theirs. Ok, they are probably perfectly safe and nice, but don’t take the

chance. Listen to their relationship history – from this you can learn a bit about what they’re looking for: whether it is a relationship or just sex. Tell your friends the details of the date – especially if it’s with someone you have no connection with. You could get your friends to phone after a while to check everything is ok, or to give you a get out clause, then call them when you get home. Vicky Godwin

CONDOMS

T A D N OU R A G N I D S E S T E I M M LI N U H YOUT

REMEMBER the whole point of using condoms is to protect yourself and to be safe. Even if you have sex once without using a condom, you still can get an STI or even get pregnant.

Make sure you check the expiry date and look for the CE mark to show it’s a trustworthy brand of condom that won’t break. When using a condom do not use anything oil based as a lubricant, (it could split or tear) just a tip! Use a water based lubricant, if in doubt just read the label!

TOP TIPS:

Check the CE mark and the expiry date Pinch the nipple (the one on the condom!) to make sure you don’t get air trapped. Use a water based lubricant

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Gently roll it onto the tip of the penis

WAN T USE RESPE CT A CO NDO ... M

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Confused by the opposite sex? Do opposites attract? Or do opposites exist just to confuse each other? We had a good natter about boys and girls, and then asked each other to answer our questions: Boys asked: Why do girls talk so much? Girls answered: Because we are more open. We have a lot to talk about, and want a second opinion on everything. Why are girls so nosey? Because knowledge is power.

Why are we always expected to make the first move? You don’t have to, but you’ve got to make some sort of effort. And it’s expensive making ourselves look this good! Surely when we get all dressed up that’s kind of us making the first move.

How come it’s ok for you to check out fit blokes, but we get accused of ‘oggling someone’s tits’ if we look at a girl? What! Guys look at girls all the time! But we’re more subtle about it than you, we don’t feel the need to yell or wolf whistle, and we’re just looking, we’re not expecting anything.

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Why are guys expected to read girls’ minds? Why don’t you just say how you feel?

Girls asked: Why can’t men hug each other? Boys answered: We can and do! What is your fascination with our breasts?

Why are you so obsessed with computer games? Not all of us are! But it’s probably because we like to escape and have our own personal space. It’s also a challenge, and we like challenges.

Get them out and we’ll tell you!

Because what’s the point? If we do, you don’t make any response. And you never ask anyway – it’s a lot harder to just announce a problem than to have someone ask you… and when we do say how we feel, you say we talk too much! How do you multi-task? How do you not multi-task? Perhaps we’re just superior beings. Why do you always insist on changing your boyfriend’s habits? Because we deserve the best and sometimes you need to shape up. Why do girls always have to look good, even just for each other? You pretend you don’t care, but if we rolled up every time in old trackies, messy hair and a baggy t-shirt you would complain. Besides, dressing good makes us feel good!

Why are you so competitive? Why do girls think being competitive is such a problem? It helps us to progress, knowing we have to be better than someone makes us better at what we do.

Why whistle and yell out of car windows? What does it achieve? Because it’s funny, and we know it doesn’t achieve anything.

Why can’t you express your emotions? We can sometimes. It’s often seen as a sign of weakness, but of course it’s not really.

What do guys think of girls who will get with anyone? Cheap! Not attractive, too easy. Does dress size matter? It does for some not for others.

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Tea!

• Facebook finds over 500 results for groups with ‘tea’ in the title, including ‘Tea and sci-fi – is there no better combination?’ and ‘Can’t beat a cuppa tea and a good old chat with your nan’. The group ‘I HATE DRINKING TEA!!’ currently only has 3 members, while ‘A cup of tea solves everything’ has over 150,000 members.

Vicki Exworthy

PUZZLES

• There are over 1,500 different types of tea, but the main varieties are black tea, green tea, oolong – which means black dragon – tea and white tea. • About 40% of the fluid Britain drinks today will be t ea. • The art of brewing tea leaves with hot water to make an enjoyable beverage was developed over 5,000 years ago in China. • According to the Guinness Book of Records, the largest ever tea party was held in February 2008 in India with over 32,000 guests. • A man called Felix Rotter is the world record holder for collecting teabag labels – he has over 10,500 of them. • The NSPCC holds ‘Stop for Tea’ fundraising events every year.

Puzzles

Alex Stone

• You can find anything on the internet these days – yes, there is a whole website dedicated to tea. Guess the address? www.tea.co.uk. • The most expensive teabag ever made cost £7,500 and contained diamonds. It was sold at auction to raise money for a children’s hospital. • The average cup of tea contains about half the caffeine of the average cup of coffee. • Some scientists believe that anti-oxidants in tea can help prevent cancer, notably prostate and skin cancer. • Despite the popular link between tea and Britain, the world’s first place teadrinking country is Ireland, consuming more tea, (no, not Guinness), per person than any other country.

He sits down with a nice cup of tea, of course! Loads of people in Britain start the day with a cup of tea, or maybe have one at work, or even held tea parties with their toys when they were younger. Let us celebrate that great English tradition: the cup of tea. Here are some facts about the nation’s favourite drink…

Dingb ats Answers: 1. You’re under arrest 2. Eggs over easy 3. Somewhere over the rainbow 4. I’m in the middle of something 5. Rock around the clock

! A TE

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Pennies and Matchsticks

What does the stereotypical Englishman do in any film, book or play?

Move only 2 matchsticks, and make a figure with 7 squares.

Picture a goat: now move only one matchstick to make a goat facing in a different direction.

Moving only three pennies, make an arrow that points down instead of up.

DINGBATS

What are these catchphrases?

1.

ARREST YOU’RE 3.

4.

2.

EGGS EASY

SOMEWHERE RAINBOW

I’MTHING

SOME 5.

R K CLOCK O C

SUDOKU

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INFO

SEXUAL HEALTH

The Point Wolverton Centre, Kingston Hospital, Galsworthy Road Tues 4-6 pm . . . . . . .020 8974 9331

Sexwise Helpline . . . . 0800 28 29 30

National AIDS Helpline . . . . . . . . . . . 0800 567 123 Ku19 @ Hawks Road Hawks Pharmacy Regent House, Hawks Road, Kingston, KT1 3DG Wed 3.30-5pm. . . . . . 020 8546 1115 Ku19 @ YMCA YMCA, 49 Victoria Road, Surbiton Thurs 3.30-6.30pm . . . . . . . . . . . 020 8549 6323

KU19@Siddeley House 50 Canbury Road, Kingston KT2 6LX Mon 3.30-6.30pm . . . 020 8974 9252

TRAVEL

Train Information . . . ..08457 484950

London Travel Information . . . . . . . . 020 7222 1234

National Express Coach Enquires . . . 0990 808080

WELFARE & BENEFITS ADVICE

Kingston Citizens Advice Bureau Neville House, 55 Eden Street, Kingston, KT1 1BW Walk-in Monday, Tuesday & Friday 11.30 - 1.30 . .. . . . .. . . . . . . . . . .0870 126 4019 Richmond Citizens Advice Bureau Linfield House, 26 Kew Road, Richmond TW9 2NA 08457 0505152 / 020 894 2501

DRUGS & ALCOHOL

Kingston Information Dealers

(Drug and Alcohol Support). . . . . .0786 753 6967 Email: id@rbk.kingston.gov.uk

Frank . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 0800 776600

Release – drugs & legal advice helpline. . . . . . . . . . . .020 7729 9904

COUNSELLING & SUPPORT

Off the Record 2 Church Street, Twickenham Tues, weds, thurs 4-8pm Fri, 2.30-6.30pm Sat, 10am-2pm (Deborah Kerpner) . . 020 8744 1644 ASKK 4 Help Txt . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .07797806523

KINGSTON SAFER NEIGHBOURHOOD TEAMS

Alexandra Team. . . . .020 8721 2516

Berrylands Team . . . .020 87212002

Beverley Team. . . . . .020 8721 2750

Canbury Team. . . .....020 8721 5882

Chessington North Team. . . . . . .. . 020 8721 2001 Chessington South Team. . . . . . . ..020 8721 2001

Coombe Hill Team. . ..020 8721 2804 Coombe Vale Team. ..020 8721 2515

Grove Team. . . . . . . ..020 8721 2588

Norbiton Team. . . . . ..020 8721 2000 Old Malden Team. . . .020 8721 2517

St James Team. . . . . .020 8721 2595

St Marks Team. . . . . .020 8721 2044

Surbiton Hill Team. . .020 8721 2518

Tolworth Team. . . . .. .020 8721 2045 Tudor Team. . . . . .. . . 020 87212580

Connexions

For Connexions please visit www.younglivin.org.uk

Youth Service

Youth Office . . . . . . . .0208 547 5815

GENERAL HEALTH

NHS Direct . . . . . . . . .0845 4647

For info on the youth centres in Kingston please visit

www.younglivin.org.uk


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