The Paper November 29, 2012

Page 14

November 29, 2012

SERVICE DIRECTORY

ATTORNEY

CONSTRUCTION

Home Care

One Call. . . Gets It All!

PERSONAL INJURY

Car Accidents • Slips and Falls FREE CONSULTATION NO FEE TILL RECOVERY Workers Compensation Call Michael Majdick, 760.731.5737

Cleaning Services ANNA’S HOUSECLEANING • Free Estimate • Great References • 20 years Experience Call 760.738.7493

JUNE, THE CLEANING LADY “When all you want is a thoroughly clean house”

Many years experience Excellent Long Term References 760.735.5852

‘Chuckles’ Cont. from Page 2

Bobcat/Backhoe/Breaker Trenching/Footings Grading/Compaction Concrete/Retaining Walls Demolition/Hauling All Underground Utilities Pool Removal Licensed/Reliable Anytime Bobcat/Backhoe Construction

760.807.0847 Ca.Lic. “A” #503159

Specializing in short and long term care assistance for all ages, with all activities of daily living, in your home. Drive to/from doctor appointments, new mommy assistance/infant care, Alzheimer patient care, general assistance before/after surgery, respite care for parents of disabled children, and much more. Call

800.783.3127 or 760.424.2400 24 hours/day - 7 days/week.

COUNSELING RELATIONSHIP IN TROUBLE?

Get the help you need now. COUNSELING | MEDIATION ANGER MANAGEMENT | PARENTING The Optimize Center 350 W. 9th Avenue, Suite 101 Escondido, CA 92025 760.747.8686

FLOORING

Ground Pounders Flooring Hardwood, Tile, Carpet I install every job. Not expensive, just good. We are in Oceanside. Glad to bring Samples & Pictures Lic#770668

Call Wade 858 829-2607

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Thursday for 2 hours begin- The sole purpose of a child’s middle name is so he can tell ning at 7:00 PM. when he’s really in trouble. Upon completion of ANY of the above courses, diplomas Why do Americans choose will be issued to the sur- from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss vivors. America? Fun Things . . . Some people say “If you can’t If I agreed with you we’d beat them, join them.” I say “If you can’t beat them, beat both be wrong. them,” because they will be I asked God for a bike, but I expecting you to join them, know God doesn’t work that so you will have the element way. So I stole a bike and of surprise. asked for forgiveness. I intend to live forever. So far, Going to church doesn’t so good. make you a Christian any more than standing in a Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenevgarage makes you a car. er they go. Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the You’re never too old to learn something stupid. answer. The last thing I want to do is Knowledge is power, and hurt you. But it’s still on the power corrupts. So study hard and be evil. list. The early bird might get the Does this rag smell like chloworm, but the second mouse roform to you? gets the cheese. I have never understood why A bus station is where a bus women love cats. Cats are stops. A train station is where independent, they don’t lisa train stops. On my desk, I ten, they don’t come in when you call, they like to stay out have a work station. all night, and when they’re If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER home they like to be left from diarrhea… does that alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that mean that one enjoys it? women hate in a man, they

Home Maintenance Improvements R. W. Masonry Company

Quality Concrete & Masonry Work Walls, Driveways, Patios, Entries, BBQ's, Fireplaces, Custom Stone & Brick, Stamp Concrete - Lic #506342 www.rwmasonry.com 760 788-6720 JOHN the GOLD HANDYMAN I am good at Painting, Plumbing, Dry Wall Repairs, Pergo, Carpet and Tile and lots more - 27 years experience. CALL NOW FOR FREE ESTIMATE 738.7493

HOME GENERAL MAINTENANCE REMODELS Bath/Kitchen Designs, Tile Installation, Electircal, Paint, Fences, Concrete. Lic#33509 760.484.1302 760.529.1239

The Paper

Office to Rent San Marcos, convenient to 78. Good for shared business. Upstairs unit and downstairs unit approx 600 square feet in. $600.00 per month gross. All utilities except telecommunications. Call Paula 760-402-2460

Real Estate SENIORS

LIVE & PLAY IN THE SUNSHINE MANUFACTURED HOMES. FREE GOLF ON THE SCGA APPROVED COURSE. CALL JOHN MARKO

619.871.4521 760.751.1936

SOUNDPROOFING

Super Soundproofing Co •Expert Products •Floor Noise Barrier •Insulation Floor and Wall Tape •Vibration Isolation Tape

Call 760.752.3030 Free Advice www.soundproofing.org

STOP SMOKING!

Investments Estate Jewelry, Collectibles Autos - Complete Estates “Anything of value that does not eat”

Call Len at 760.519.9633

MORTGAGE LOANS Professional licensed experienced Broker. Mortgage loans & real estate sales and investments work together for you! Purchase, refinance and reverse loans avail. Residential and Commercial Loans Available.

Call Heidi: 760-529-5542 "THE MORTGAGE PLACE & PROPERTY WORKS"

DRE 01770983 NMLS 945543

love in a cat. If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer…oh wait, he does. Well aren’t you a waste of two billion years of evolution. Isn’t it odd the way everyone automatically assumes that the goo in soap dispensers is always soap? I like to fill mine with mustard, just to teach people a lesson in trust. America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won’t cross the street to vote. Money talks … but all mine ever says is good-bye. We are all time travelers moving at the speed of exactly 60 minutes per hour.

Materialism: buying things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people that don’t matter. Vegetarian: Native American word for “lousy hunter.”

Death Notices Maria T. Contreras, 65, of Valley Center, CA., passed away on November 25, 2012. J. Adan G. Nieto, 65, of Escondido, CA., passed away on November 25, 2012. Baldomero S. Vega, 90, of Escondido, CA., passed away on November 21, 2012. Frances D. Schlosser, 89, of Escondido, CA. passed away on November 20, 2012. Evelyn C. Bakko, of Escondido, Ca., passed away on November 24, 2012. Loren B. Davis, 71, of Palomar Mountain, CA., passed away on November 17, 2012.

Arrangements by

California Funeral Alternatives Escondido and Poway


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