The Paper • Page 7 • October 27, 2016 ACROSS FROM THE SAN MARCOS CEMETERY
It was a mild and sunny day in October 1996 and my husband and I were enjoying a cup of coffee on our patio. We had purchased the home in 1994 after selling our ranch in Poway. The many years of quiet, off-thebeaten-track lifestyle of raising calves, goats and Queensland Heeler dogs had gotten a bit too physical for our advancing years. We didn’t miss the quiet ranch life and actually enjoyed the hustle and bustle of neighbors and traffic. In addition, our home was located across from the San Marcos Cemetery, a fact most of our friends and acquaintances found disturbing. We, on the other hand, were fascinated by the activities in that cemetery. The crack of the 21-gun salute followed by the haunting notes of Taps when a member of the military was buried. The gathering of whitehaired mourners when one of their own passed on. And the saddest of burials, that of a child’s casket being lowered into the ground.
It was the latter case that we were apparently watching that October day. Youngsters holding strings attached to multicolored balloons, women and men with white-cloth handkerchiefs to their faces, and not one, but three, small caskets lined above three deep, dark holes in the ground. My mind flashed to the recent newspaper stories of the four young boys killed, shot to death by their mother. Our coffee turned cold, the bright beautiful day, darkened, we stood and mourned with the group of youngsters and adults standing quietly across the street in the San Marcos Cemetery.
Several years passed after three of the four Eubank boys’ burials (the oldest boy was buried in Texas). I became a regular visitor to the cemetery to visit my husband’s grave, which was located about 25 feet from the Eubank boy’s gravesites that had only three rust-colored bricks with each boy’s initial, last name and date of death to mark their passing.
Rarely did I see flowers or plants on the graves. I asked one of the caretakers about the lack of grave markers, and he told me the boy’s father did not want any other markers.
The whole situation bothered me, and finally I decided to look into it. Thinking that cost might be the reason there still were no markers on the graves of the brothers, I went to a business that specialized in gravestones. I talked to a sales person about why I was there, and she suggested one larger marker with the names of the boys and birth and death dates and some sort of inscription such as “Rest in Peace” or similar saying. The cost would run around $1,200 to $1,500, including setting it on the site. I thanked her and said I would get back with instructions. I knew I could raise that amount of money among friends, and I returned to the cemetery and discussed this with the head caretaker. He said he and his crew would put the marker in at no additional cost. So already a quarter of the money was raised. The caretaker, however, cautioned me that money and placement was not the problem. No one could do anything without the approval of the father.
Historically Speaking by Tom Morrow
The ‘I Kid You Not’ Man
Jack Paar, born May 1, 1918, was a man who wore many professional hats. He was an American author, radio and television comedian and talk show host, best known for his stint as host of NBC’s The Tonight Show from 1957 to 1962.
The father still lived in the area with a listed phone number. I called him with who I was and my plan for a marker. His answer. NO!
Editor’s Note: The writer, Pat Johnson, lives in San Marcos, as the story says, across from the San Marcos Cemetery. She is taking a writing class at CSUSM and her instructor suggested she submit this essay to The Paper.
We foune it well written and worthy of publication. (We would suggest to her instructor that she be given an “A” for her essay.
For a great GIFT idea anytime of the year Give a gift subscription to The Paper! Call 760.747.7119 for details
In 1957, NBC asked Paar to succeed Steve Allen as host of The Tonight Show, which had been renamed and replaced with various failed series in the interim after Allen had left the show for prime time. Paar hosted the program from 1957 to 1962 during the peak of the series' national attention. At first, the show was called Tonight Starring Jack Paar; after 1959 it was officially known as The Jack Paar Show. He often was unpredictable, emotional, and principled. When network censors cut a joke about a "water closet" (the British term for a toilet), on Feb. 11, 1960, he received national attention by walking off the show, not returning until three weeks later after the network apologized and he was allowed to tell the joke.
Paar's first words on camera when he returned was, “… as I was saying.” Paar’s emotional nature made the everyday routine of putting together a 105minute program difficult to continue for more than five years. Paar confided in comedian-writer Dick Cavett that leaving the late night show was the greatest mistake of his life.
My next step.
It has now been twenty years since the boys were murdered. Will they ever have markers telling of their short lives on this earth?
Paar also signed as a contract player for Howard Hughes' RKO Pictures in the immediate post war period, appearing in a few forgettable films. He got his first tastes of television in the early 1950s, appearing as a comic on The Ed Sullivan Show and hosting two game shows, Up To Paar (1952)] and Bank on the Stars (1953).
Jack Paar
While I’m sure Johnny Carson fans will disagree, those of us old enough to remember Paar and his days on the late-night talk fest will agree he put the show on the television history’s map.
Paar had a rough childhood. A native of Canton, Ohio, later moving to Jackson, Mich. As a child he had a stuttering problem which he conquered. He contracted tuberculosis when he was 14, and left school at 16. In his book P.S. Jack Paar, he recalled doing utility duty at Cleveland’s WGAR in 1938 when Orson Welles broadcast his famous simulated alien invasion, The War of the Worlds over the CBS network. Attempting to calm possible panicked listeners, Paar announced, "The world is not coming to an end. Trust me. When have I ever lied to you?”
Paar was drafted into the military in 1943 during World War II. The Army assigned him to the U.S.O in the South Pacific to entertain the troops.He was a clever, wise-cracking master of ceremonies whose impersonations of officers nearly got him into trouble. After World War II, Paar got his big break when Jack Benny, who had been impressed by Paar's U.S.O. performances, suggested he serve as Benny’s 1947 summer radio replacement. Paar was enough of a hit on Benny's show that the sponsor, American Tobacco Company decided to keep him on the air, moving him to ABC for the fall season.
During the Tonight Show era, Cavett, a writer for Paar, recalled when Jayne Mansfield was scheduled to appear, they worked for two days, but couldn’t come up with an introduction. Finally, Cavett handed Paar a six-word intro: “Ladies and Gentlemen, here they are,” (referring to the ample-chested movie star. Paar had a familiar comment when telling a story, “… I kid you not,” which also was the title to his autobiography. Like Carson, Paar’s array of guests ranged from entertainers to politicians, but unlike his successor, he hosted a large number of intellectuals who Paar could certainly keep up with. The discussions were done in such a way that Paar interviewed the subject at hand making it very easy for the audience to follow.
Paar continued to appear in occasional specials for the network until 1970. In the 1980s and 1990s, Paar made rare guest appearances on Donahue, The Tonight Show (hosted by Johnny Carson and Jay Leno), and Late Night with David Letterman, as well as Charles Grodin's CNBC talk show.
Paar was married to his second wife, Miriam Wagner, for nearly 61 years— from 1943 until his death in 2004. His health declined in the late 1990s. He died at his Greenwich, Connecticut home on Jan. 27, 2004. His death at age 85 came just a year before his Tonight Show successor Johnny Carson, who died from emphysema.
Tom Morrow's books are available at Amazon.com in soft-cover or via Kindle E-mail.