free Inspired advice for parents of tweens & teens
JULY/AUG 2015
embrace
ROAD TRIP!
exploring SA's best driving holidays
Taryn Brumfitt talks generational body image
where do you draw The Line?
win!
surprising statistics on teen attitudes to domestic violence
MINI! an iPad e for id See ins ils! deta
HOW TO SUPPORT
risk-taking teens
JODIE ODDY
on social media, trolls & bullying
WELLBEING
MINUTES to a better
LIFE!
INSTA-WHO?
A PARENT'S GUIDE to SOCIAL MEDIA
for the whole family › Raising a sports prodigy › Beating the winter bugs › Meditation for teens › Apps for health & wellbeing › Clear skin tips
+ TEEN BEDROOM STYLE + TWEEN WINTER FASHION
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At Romeo’s we are a family that prides ourselves on supplying you with the freshest local ingredients. Whether you want fresh baked rolls, succulent grain fed meat, ocean fresh seafood or our daily market fresh produce, we look forward to serving you soon.
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contents
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JULY/AUGUST 2015
lifestyle
cover story
9. Tween Boy Fashion It may be a clichè, but blue is definitely a boys colour this Autumn/Winter, in every shade imaginable.
24. Jodie Oddy: Social media, cyberbullying and protecting our children Jodie Oddy talks to Sarah Hausler about how she navigates this whole new world of parenting dilemmas.
11. Tween Girl Fashion Just when we thought it was over, animal print has made a comeback! Joining the big cats this season are pandas, zebras and camels. Turn your daughters wardrobe into a wildlife safari. 12. Teen Interiors If you already find it hard to get your teen out of bed each morning, you may want to skip this feature on cozy soft furnishings for teen spaces.
wellbeing feature 28. Risky Business Family counsellor Emma Holdsworth, shares her top tips for parents dealing with risktaking teens.
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14. Hers Emma Grey shows us how to upgrade our lives, 15 minutes at a time.
20. Vamping Jo Bainbridge explores the concept of #vamping. Is it really that big a deal?
38. About Face Skin expert and nutritionist Olivia Jenkins explains how the ancient art of face mapping can identify the source of teens acne. 40. Apps for Wellbeing There’s an app for that! Use of health and wellbeing apps is on the rise. We’ve gathered our favourite apps for you and your family.
TRAVEL FEATURE 49. Road Trip We take you through some of South Australia’s greatest road trips, from the heart of the outback, along stunning coastline, through worldrenowned food and wine regions and to our grand Murray River.
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parenting 18. Social Media Guide The Modern Parent, Martine Ogelthorpe, helps us make sense of the most popular social media platforms our kids are using.
34. Too Much, Too Soon? Our Editor Sarah explores the concept of early sport specialisation. Is it really the path to greatness?
30. Meditation for Teens Yogi, Jane Miller explains how meditation may be just the antidote to the fast paced world our teens inhabit. 32. Beat the Winter Bugs Our resident naturopath, Jess Donovan shares her top five tips for boosting your family’s immunity this winter.
"you just can’t be vanilla in my job. but that’s ok because i don’t want to be vanilla" Jodie Oddy
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REGULARS 16. Q&A We talk generational body shame with Taryn Brumfitt, founder of the Body Image Movement. 22. The BIG Issue Juliet Pannozzo explores the serious issue of domestic violence and unearths shocking statistics about our teens. 42. In the Kitchen Stephanie Alexander shares her favourite winter recipes.
check out these awesome prizes!
WIN an iPad mini
Like us to go in the draw, at www.facebook.com/AveryParentMag
44. Education Annie Harvey helps us get the most out of a meeting with the teacher.
WIN one of two ‘My 15 Minutes’ programs
46. Finance Paul Clitheroe shares his best tips to ensure money issues don’t de-rail your relationship.
Learn to love your body again. See details page 17.
48. Is your teen starting their first job? Maria Keszler guides us through the paperwork. 56. Mum’s the Word Jenni Eyles shares with us her experience as a ‘technology migrant’. 57. Ruby Writes Our in-house teen talks cyberbullying. 58. Top 20 Teens these days may think they have it tough but nothing compares to the trials of our youth.
Take back your life 15 minutes at a time! See details page 14.
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july/august 2015
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welcome to avery
Published by Avery Magazine Editor Sarah Hausler Art Director Nicole Aspinall Graphic Designer Janneke Posthumus
Blood. Sweat. Tears.
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ren’t these the three magic ingredients required to bring a big project to completion? It’s such a cliché and it’s trotted out in every home renovation show ever filmed. Well, I’m proud to say there was neither blood, sweat, nor tears* shed over the creation of this, our very first issue of Avery Magazine. But that doesn’t mean it’s been without challenges. In place of blood, sweat and tears, the team here at Avery have been through a different kind of trial over the past few months. We’ve experienced sleepless nights, angst, second guessing, gnawing self doubt, bargaining, calling in of favours, a ridiculously steep learning curve, the seeking out of mentors, rewrites and countless edits. Not to mention an overriding fear of whether we could actually pull this thing together to create something amazing, inspiring and useful. There’s a few parallels there with parenting, am I right? And for the record, naming a magazine is a much, much harder process than naming a child. Firstly, you don’t have to check whether your preferred baby name has already been registered as a business, or whether the dotcom URL is actually available. Most parents also have nine months to decide on their chosen name. We had about nine days. So why Avery? Well, we think it’s a pretty cool name – for a girl or a boy – yay for gender neutrality! But the main reason we chose Avery was for its meaning of “inspired advice” or “magical counsel”. Now we’re certainly not saying that we are that inspired font of knowledge. We’re not that self-important! But isn’t that what we all could use? A little bit of magic. Doesn’t raising children require a certain level of sorcery? Yes, I believe we could all benefit from a little bit of magical counsel, especially when it comes to parenting teens and tweens. And speaking of the young ones, Urban Dictionary also defines Avery as “awesome beyond all measure”. So we’re totally claiming that. But what we’re most interested in is what YOU think of Avery. We’ve created this magazine with you in mind. As our tagline says, our mission is to inspire and inform. So please hit us up with your feedback, positive or constructive – all of it. What did you love about this issue? What could we have done better? What did we miss? What topics would you like to see us cover? Email me at sarah@averymagazine.com.au and together we can continue to develop Avery into something we can all be proud of. Until next issue,
Sarah Hausler, Editor * Okay, maybe there were a few tears.
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Director, Business Development Lynette Kelly
CONTRIBUTORS Stephanie Alexander, Jo Bainbridge, Paul Clitheroe, Claire Cosh, Jess Donovan, Jenni Eyles, Emma Grey, Annie Harvey, Olivia Jenkins, Maria Keszler, Jane Miller, Martine Ogelthorpe, Juliet Pannozzo, Sarah Shanahan, Ruby Stewart ILLUSTRATION Kate Mason PHOTOGRAPHY Nicole Aspinall, Claire Cosh, Sarah Shanahan
PRINT Print Know How www.printknowhow.com.au DISTRIBUTION Passing Out Distribution www.passingout.com.au Romeo's Foodland, IGA and SupaIGA www.romeosretailgroup.com.au
ADVERTISING ENQUIRIES Lynette Kelly Phone 0438 513 960 Email lynette@averymagazine.com.au
GENERAL ENQUIRIES Address PO Box 715 Prospect East SA 5082 Email hello@averymagazine.com.au Website www.averymagazine.com.au
COPYRIGHT All material appearing in Avery Magazine is copyright unless otherwise stated or it may rest with the provider of the supplied material. No part of Avery Magazine will be reproduced without written permission from the Publisher. Avery Magazine takes all care to ensure information is correct at the time of printing, but the publisher accepts no responsibility or liability for the accuracy of any content, illustrations, photographs, advertisements or pricing. Views expressed are not neccessarily endorsed by the publisher or editor.
hello winter... Winter cops a bad rap, don’t you think? Sure, it doesn’t have the glorious sunshine and carefree days of summer. Nor does it have springtime’s expectant sense of rebirth and new beginnings. And it certainly doesn’t have the Instagram-worthy colour palette of autumn. Grey skies, soggy weather, colds and flu. Yes, winter has its downfalls. But despite all this, winter too has its redeeming qualities. Quiet evenings relaxing by a roaring fire, lazy mornings snuggled under the doona, massive bowls of your Mum’s world-famous pumpkin soup with lashings of sour cream and crispy bacon bits stirred through. There’s something to be said for the forced hibernation of winter. It’s basically the universe’s way of telling us to slow down and take a break after the busyness of those first six months of the year and before the onslaught of the “can you believe it’s almost Christmas” period, which we know will be here all too soon. So let’s not wish winter away. Let’s savour it, immerse ourselves in the luxury of retreat and hibernation. Can you bring me a hot chocolate? I’ll be under the doona cover...
july/august 2015
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contributors
WE’VE SCOURED THE STATE TO BRING TOGETHER OUR AMAZING TEAM OF EXPERTS.
jenni eyles
janneke posthumus
Columnist A mum of two teenage boys, proudly curvy, a lover of all things pretty and a cancer thriver.
Stylist A graphic designer and interior architect with two boys - a tween and a teen, Janneke believes we should all find our own style.
www.stylingcurvy.com
jo bainbridge
www.jannekeposthumus.wordpress.com
annie harvey
Columnist A Gen X wife and mother of three teens. Jo loves chocolate, wine, 80s music and good company.
Education A school teacher who firmly believes all children can reach their full potential provided they are supported in their learning.
www.sweet-child-of-mine.tumblr.com
www.kipmcgrath.com.au/holdfastbay
emma grey
SARAH SHANAHAN
Columnist A published author, speaker and trainer, Emma is the mother of two teenage girls and a three year old boy. She also has two step-children in their early twenties.
Stylist A professional organiser with a passion for interior design, Sarah is a mother of four teens who thrives on order and organisation.
www.worklifebliss.com.au
claire cosh
www.sarahshouse.com.au
emma holdsworth
Stylist A long time fashion and interiors addict with a journalism degree, a baby and a couple of tweens.
Family Counsellor A counsellor and parent educator, Emma is passionate about supporting families to transform their relationships.
www.clairecollected.com
www.treehousecounselling.com.au
SARAH HAUSLER
ruby stewart
Editor A journalist, Occupational Therapist and mum, Sarah combines clinical expertise and a love of writing to inspire, inform and support parents and families.
Columnist At 13, Ruby has her sights set on a career in journalism. Her loves include netball, softball, piano, reading and One Direction.
www.sarahhausler.com.au
jessica donovan
Naturopath A women’s holistic health expert, Jess’ down to earth approach helps empower women to take charge of their own and their family’s wellbeing. www.energeticmama.com
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maria keszler
Finance Experienced accountant and partner at a community based, family focused accounting firm. www.herns.com.au
(life)style | tween boy fashion
www.ikks.com
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into the
blue
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BY CLAIRE COSH
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Winter is here and darker tones have packed the shelves once again. But in an industry where black is ALWAYS the new black, blue has made a fashion comeback for Autumn/Winter 2015. With every shade imaginable, feel free to mix it up, or choose your favourite and pair with greys or neutrals. The world of tween fashion has definitely drifted back into the blue.
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www.industriekids.com
.au
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1. SCOTCH & SODA TEE $59.95, 2. ALFIE APPAREL ROLL SLEEVE TEE $34.95, 3. SCOTCH & SODA MERCER DENIM JEAN $129.95, 4. SCOTCH & SODA EXPLORER JACKET $269.95, 5. COUNTRY ROAD SAND DESERT BOOT $149.95, 6. INDUSTRIE JACKET HOUNSLOW HOODED $79.95, 7. SEED QUILTED RAGLAN SWEAT $49.95, 8. SCOTCH & SODA TEE $59.95, 9. INDUSTRIE TERRACE TRACKIE PANT $54.95, 10. NEW BALANCE VINTAGE INDIGO SNEAKER $69.95, 11. SCOTCH & SODA KNITTED BEANIE $44.95, 12. SCOTCH & SODA BELT $29.95 july/august 2015
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(life)style | highlight
july august 2015
August is visual art month in South Australia. The annual SALA Festival celebrates and promotes the diverse talents of South Australian Living Artists. www.salainc.com.au
high·light n. An especially significant or interesting detail or event. 77% of 12-17 year olds have NOT smoked. The proportion of 12–17 year olds who have never smoked decreases in the older age groups, but by age 17 more than half have still never smoked. www.druginfo.adf.org.au
Science Alive
77%
Across the nation, Science Week is being held this August, encouraging young people to further their natural curiosity and engage in the various sciences. For the 10th year, Science Alive returns to the Adelaide Showgrounds, bigger and better than ever, with new science shows, hands-on attractions and, for this year only, special presenters and exhibits from Canberra based Questacon. Looking for something new and fun to get fit? Get excited about exercise! Adults ABC GROUP TRAINING: Tuesday 7pm, Wynn Vale Thursday 6.15am Surrey Downs DANCEPL3Y Adults: Monday 7pm, Surrey Downs DANCEPL3Y Kids: Saturday 10am, Parafield Gardens Bookings: 0426 237 272 or jodieh10@gmail.com
All the old favourites will also be back, including native animals, Stardomes, LED torch-making, robots, electronics, the Curiosity Show, slime, smoke rings and more than 50 science organisations offering interactive and fun activities. When: 9am to 4pm, August 8-9 Where: Goyder Pavillion Adelaide Showgrounds Tickets: $15 adults $10 concession Free for children under 18 www.scienceweek.net.au
in the hardest times we grow the most DRY JULY Could you give up alcohol for a month? Dry July is a fundraiser that challenges you to go booze-free for a month to support adults living with cancer. Taking part in Dry July also gives you the chance to focus on yourself – notice your own drinking habits and the value of a healthy, balanced lifestyle for your own wellbeing, and that of your family. www.dryjuly.com
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Among this year’s SALA exhibitions is ID: Identity and Portraiture, which explores the concept of personal identity and community participation. Visitors to the Adelaide Airport can enjoy a performative exhibition by South Australian artists Andrew Clarke, Daniel Connell and Luke Thurgate, who will be drawing live inside the terminal. Connell plans to complete existing large scale portraits, while Clarke and Thurgate will capture the frenetic energy and personality of the airport environment. The live art performance will be held between 4pm and 7pm on the 7th, 14th and 21st of August.
(life)style | tween girl fashion www.joeetween
.com.au
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animal kingdom
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BY CLAIRE COSH
Just when we thought it was over, animal print has made a come back. Joining the ever popular big cats are pandas, zebras and camels. It seems the whole jungle has hit the hangers! Mixed with earthy neutrals and pops of colour, this high impact trend adds a modern edge to any outfit. If you’re brave, clashing prints are so hot right now, and this age 12 group are young and cool enough to pull it off.
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8 14 9 7 1. ZARA JACKET $59.90, 2. POP UP SHOP TIGER LEO $69.95, 3. SCOTCH & SODA ANIMAL JEAN $149.95, 4. SEED OCELOT SHOES $44.95, 5. SEED OVERNIGHT BAG $79.95, 6. MINI RODINI SUNGLASSES $54.95, 7. SEED TEEN ELASTIC CUFF PANT $59.95, 8. SCOTCH & SODA GRANDDAD TEE $34.95, 9. DR MARTIN OLIVE $150, 10. SEED TEEN OCELOT PUFFA $59.95, 11. SEED HERITAGE ANIMALIA LEGGING $24.95, 12. SUDO PRETENDER ALMOST DENIM JEANS $74.95 13. ZARA FRINGED LEATHER BOOTS $65.90, 14. SCOTCH & SODA SKINNY BELT $44.95 july/august 2015
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(life)style | teen interiors
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winter warmers
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BY JANNEKE POSTHUMUS
There’s no greater pleasure than snuggling up in bed on a cold winter’s morning. Give your teens an extra reason to sleep in (or a reason to go to bed early!) with these new season soft furnishings in bold shades of lime, teal and pink with a neutral base of grey.
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The Hall by cottonon.com
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www.aurahome.com.au
Want help to TRANSFORM Relationships, Communication and Behaviour in your Family? Call today to book your FREE initial session to see how Tree House can help your family.
0401 356 358
Ph: email: emma@treehousecounselling.com.au
www.treehousecounselling.com.au
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Find us on FACEBOOK & INSTAGRAM
(life)style | teen interiors 8
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1. ISTANBUL LIME CUSHION $69.95, 2. MEH. MUG $7.99, 3. KOALA HEAT BUDDY by MURPHY & DAUGHTERS $35, 4. DUO QUILT COVER SET $178, 5. KOLMIO CUSHION from INCY INTERIORS $49.95, 6. JUMBO STRIPE CUSHION $49.95, 7. HICCUPS FOLK BIRDS CUSHION $29.95, 8. GEO THROW by SCOUT LIFESTYLE $300, 9. SUPERNOVA QUILT COVER SET $189.95, 10. NICE CUSHY by TYPO $24.99, 11. DJ OTTER PILLOW $39, 12. PABLO CUSHION $63, 13. MEXICAN MISFIT CUSHION COVER from INCY INTERIORS $109, 14. OTTO & SPIKE STARTRUCK MERINO THROW $300
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www.linenhouse.com.au
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Chatswood Chase | 1300 94 20 50
www.incyinteriors.com.au
july/august 2015
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(life)style | hers
a better life in just 15 minutes a day BY EMMA GREY
It makes sense that the more you have to do, the more important it is to take care of yourself. In the ‘real world’ however, it seems the more we take on, the faster ‘self care’ slips down the priority scale, until it falls clean off the list.
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hen we’re busy with the day-to-day management of career, family and household, the idea of self improvement can feel about as achievable as finally folding all the washing piled high on the couch. We know we ought to take better care of our health. We know relationships need energy and work. We know we can have a career that we love. We know it’s possible to have our finances organised and our house decluttered and still have time for fun and recreation. We know all of this, but we’re wondering who has time? As mums, we easily slip into ‘survival’ mode. We sacrifice our own needs daily, while telling ourselves it’s only for a few years, and that we’ll make progress in our own lives when things calm down a little. But there is another way. You might not have long stretches of time available to make improvements in your life, but can you find just 15 minutes each day? If you can, here are some powerful and achievable ways to get your act together in just 15 short minutes a day.
Health and wellbeing
Fill a bucket with warm water and grab a towel. Add some of those unopened bath salts or oils that clutter up the back of the vanity waiting for ‘one day’. Sit down for 15 minutes with your feet swishing in the bucket of water and don’t move! The trick with this challenge is not to wait for ideal circumstances. This is not about recreating the ambience of a five-star retreat, it’s about slowing down and taking care of yourself now - where you are, with what you have, for one 100th of your day.
Relationships
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It’s a beautiful thing to feel acknowledged. Take 15 minutes to send an email, message, letter or card to someone who made a difference in your life in some way. Don’t spend time agonising about getting the wording exactly right—it’s not about that. Just tell someone what their actions meant to you and watch as you unfold a little magic in their life, and in yours.
Career
Sometimes the perfect job pops up at short notice. You’re left scrambling to update your CV and fill out selection criteria. Take 15 minutes now to add your current position to your CV. You’ll feel more in control to know the most recent version is completely up-to-date, ready to be sent at short notice if the role of your dreams presents itself.
Finances
People who take ‘proper holidays’ are usually the ones who plan well ahead. Spend 15 minutes with your partner or friends finding a suitable date for a break and lock it into your calendar. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know where you’ll go yet - figuring that out later is the fun part! Email your boss with a request for leave now. Then open a holiday account. You can do this online or over the phone. Create a direct debit, no matter how small, to come out each pay day. When we ‘pay ourselves first’ in time and money, we make wonderful things happen.
Personal development
We can become so entangled in our own comfort zones that we forget how exhilarating it can be to step out of them. Take 15 minutes to do something that scares you. It might be making a bold phone call for your business, signing up for dance classes or sending someone an original story you’ve written. No matter what you choose, make it slightly scary! Every small step we take into unknown territory helps us grow.
Fun & Recreation
Remember lying on the grass as a child, staring up at the sky? Lazy weekends were spent imagining shapes in the clouds and daydreaming. As adults, we’re so busy rushing from A to B, we rarely make time to ‘look up’ any more. Take a picnic rug, find a tree and some comfy space on the ground, lie down and look up for a few minutes, either alone or with your kids. It’s these moments that ground us, relax us and remind us there’s more to life than our current set of responsibilities and challenges. There are endless ways we can take small steps to improve our lives. Once you move into the 15-minutes mindset, you’ll soon realise the power of the ‘nooks and crannies’ in your day.
what can you do in 15 minutes? Not enough time. Not enough space. Not enough energy. Avery magazine is delighted to offer readers a chance to win one of two My 15 Minutes 90-day Online Programs. (www.my15minutes.com.au) Email your entries to hello@averymagazine.com.au with the subject line “My 15 Minutes” and include your name, address and phone number.
Competition closes 31/8/15. Winners will be notified in September. Full terms and conditions at www.averymagazine.com.au
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(life)style | hers
Workout with a friend...
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Your best friend has stuck with you through the good times and the bad, so if you need someone to help you stay on track it makes sense to call her to motivate you. Here are some of Fernwood’s best reasons to enlist a buddy to help you reach your fitness goals: You get to catch-up on all the latest news Finding time to connect with friends can be difficult. Tick two things off your ‘to do’ list by combining your workout with a catch-up. You don’t want to let them down It’s more difficult to cancel your workout if you’ve arranged to meet a friend for a run. If you cancel, you’re not only letting yourself down, but you’re letting them down too.
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You can motivate each other No one knows you better than your best friend. Do you have a weakness for sugary 3pm pickme-ups? A motivating message just before your afternoon cravings will help you say no, and keep you on track to reach your goals. www.fernwoodfitness.com.au
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Q&A | embrace
with Q&A taryn brumfitt For as long as there has been fashion, magazines, movies and supermodels, there has also been body shame and judgement. Teens have always been particularly susceptible, but before we start helping our children foster a positive body image, we may need to first repair our own relationship with our body.
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very editor Sarah Hausler talks to Taryn Brumfitt, creator of the Body Image Movement and mother of three, about teens, parents and the important discussions around body shame and acceptance.
Avery: How much influence do parents have on their children’s body image? How do we compete against the ever present onslaught of advertising, music videos, social media and their peers? Taryn: We need to educate our teenagers that not all they see is real, and that sexualisation and objectification of girls and women is not ok. We need them to understand this is not normal behaviour and there are a lot of companies who are trying to sell them a product by making them feel a certain way. Teens will often do the opposite of whatever we tell them. But they actually do value our opinions and will take on board what we are saying if we are sincere – not that they will admit it! Teenagers today can be far more perceptive than we were when we were young. It all comes down to education and open dialogue. Talk to them about how fake it all is. Avery: How can we support our teenage daughters – and sons – to develop their own body confidence, and not fall prey to the body-shaming and self-loathing so common in today’s society? Taryn: It’s important that we’re careful what we say about ourselves, our kids and anyone else for that matter! We need to start by not body shaming ourselves, by being conscious of words, terminologies and concepts that reinforce the notion that we have to look better. Again it comes down to dialogue with your kids. Talk to them, tell them that YOU feel great today and that they’re great today and that they’re funny, intelligent, wise and wonderful to be around. Teens can take things very seriously so it’s important they’re exposed to as much positive language and ideas about the way people look and how we should value ourselves. Reinforce this concept for them as well as yourselves! Live the message you are trying to get through to them.
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Avery: What about bullying – body image is a huge pain point many bullies use to their advantage – how do we help fortify our children against these tactics? How can we educate would be bullies not to use body shaming? Taryn: We need to educate our children to understand that bodies come in all shapes, sizes and abilities. There is no right or wrong when it comes to bodies. We must be respectful and not judge people’s bodies or other people full stop! We all have our own unique circumstances and life experiences that have led us to where we are today. Often bullies have issues themselves, they turn on other people to make themselves feel better. We can help stop the cycle by instilling in our kids a strong self belief. By not being affected by bullying, it disempowers the bully.
It’s never too late for change, you can start in this moment. Avery: Do you see much inter-generational body image issues – for example, Granny passed down her issues to Mum, who passed them down to the granddaughter? Taryn: This is a big one! The amount of negative body image related stories we’ve heard that have unfortunately been passed down by our mums and older relatives often stem from them meaning well, but they have a huge impact. Avery: So how do we break that cycle? Taryn: We have to take responsibility within our own homes and families to provide our children with a safe place to live, where there is no body shaming. We can do this through practical things such as not standing on the scales, not talking about diets and not commenting on anyone else’s body. We need to teach our children that they should value other people based on the things they do and the contributions they make, not on how they look.
Q&A | embrace Avery: What would you say to a Mum who is thinking “Crap, it’s too late, I’ve already made such a bad body image impression on my teen!” Taryn: No! No! NO! Its never too late! It’s Never, Too. Late! As a side note here, please know that guilt serves no purpose, so if you are thinking ‘I’ve done this, and I haven’t done that’ you are not alone. We’re all doing the best we can do. It’s never too late for change, you can start in this moment. Positivity and change rubs off on other people, so go for it! Have a conversation with your teenager, as they’re old enough to understand. Sit down and say “Crap, I think I said X, Y and Z, and you know what, I don’t think that is actually true. I want to talk about some of the mistakes I made and what changes I’m going to make to embrace more body types and judge less”.
It all comes down to education and open dialogue. Talk to them about how fake it all is. Avery: What about the boys? How do we explain body image issues to our sons? Should we be having different conversations with boys and girls about body image? Taryn: Boys are often told to be strong, to not ‘cry like a girl’ and to shut their feelings down. Why should we do that? Expressing and understanding feelings, negative and positive is essential for growth and maturity. We need to have conversations about body image and the concept of how our sons see women and girls, and what those girls should look like. With boys, we need to educate them that what they see in magazines, games and movies is not real. That what they need to be looking for in a girl is someone who makes them feel great. I think beauty is something you can’t see. It is kindness and compassion, humility, humour and all of those things. We need to teach our boys that their value systems should be based on these things, not thigh gaps, size of breasts or ‘hot’ bodies.
An excerpt from Embrace
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othing was going to stop me from having surgery, I had made up my mind. The logistics of surgery were arranged, all I needed to do was go and have it done. I never expected a change of heart. In fact, you could have knocked me over with a feather. Everything changed in an ordinary moment. As I was watching Mikaela playing on the floor in front of me, I had an epiphany... I was absolutely convinced that a boob job and a tummy tuck was going to make me happy, and I was wondering just how that would feel, and then out of nowhere it happened. I’d never experienced an epiphany before but it was like a lightning bolt had come from the sky and hit the ground in front of me when this thought struck me: How am I going to teach Mikaela to love her body if I can’t do the same? It never occurred to me until that moment that my boob job and tummy tuck would potentially affect the relationship that Mikaela has with her body as she gets older. I didn’t want to put her in that position. I didn’t want to be the reason that she hated her body, or the reason that she wanted to change her body.
Taryn is currently filming her upcoming documentary, Embrace, based on her personal story and the global mission that is the Body Image Movement. She also released her first book earlier this year. “Embrace. My story from body loather to body lover”, outlines her journey from being a woman so disgusted by her own body that she was planning plastic surgery, to being the leader of an international body acceptance movement. Check it out and join the movement at www.bodyimagemovement.com.au
wi n!
Avery magazine is delighted to offer readers a chance to win a copy of Embrace. Email your entries to hello@averymagazine.com.au with the subject line “Embrace” and include your name, address and phone number. Competition closes 31/8/15. Winners will be notified in September. Full terms and conditions at www.averymagazine.com.au
july/august 2015
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parenting | technology
the modern parent's guide to
SOCIAL
MEDIA BY MARTINE OGLETHORPE
Every day there seems to be a new app, social media site or forum where our kids can ‘hangout’ online. Martine reviews a few of the most popular sites our kids are using and highlights some of the settings that can help make them safer.
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nstagram is a social networking app based on photo and video sharing. Users create a username, follow other users, allow users to follow them and can like and comment on the photos of those they follow. They take a photo, or record a 15 second video, add filters, add a hashtag for searchability, tag friends and post to their account. The images will then appear in the feed of all those who follow. Any young person on Instagram should have their accounts set to private. It is important to note that only the photos remain private. Any information on the profile (profile pic, bio, username) is not private. Once a photo has a hashtag however, that particular photo can be viewed by anyone searching that hashtag, regardless of the account being private. The current age recommendation for an Instagram user is 13 and over.
parenting | technology
S
SNAP CHAT
napchat is a photo and video sharing app that allows users to send a photo or video and choose how long it stays ‘live’, for between 1 to 10 seconds. Once the image or video has been viewed and that time is up, the photo or video ‘disappears’ or is deleted from the receiver’s feed. Snapchat have now added a ‘chat’ and video messaging feature. A Snapchat ‘story’ is a group of images taken over a 24 hour period. They live a little longer than regular snaps but will self destruct after 24 hours. You can determine if this is viewed by your ‘friends’ list, a custom list of friends or the public. The minimum age requirement is 13. Those between the ages of 13 and 17 are required to have parent consent and those under 13 will be directed to the more child friendly “Snapkidz” app. Snapchat has been dubbed the ‘sexting app’ for enticing a more risqué approach to photo sharing based on the belief the photos will disappear. Photos can still hang around via a screenshot which renders the photo just as permanent as any other photo online. It is against the law to send any sexually explicit pictures of a person under 18 regardless of consent, purpose or motive.
KIK MESSENGER
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ik allows you to talk to your friends, much like a phone SMS but without the phone connection. You can also attach photos to privately send to people. As kids seem to be on this at quite a young age, there is a definite need for some involvement to be sure that they know all the people they are talking to. For those with an iPhone, Kik searches your email contacts and finds people for you to connect with. If you are connecting via your ipod Touch or iPad you can simply search for the usernames that you want to connect with and then they must accept you as a ‘friend’. Keep close tabs on this one as all the talking can be done in ‘private’ so make sure that you know everyone on your child’s list of connections. Many parents (myself included) didn’t realise their kids were chatting via their iPod touch when they thought they were only good for games and music! This means monitoring of iPods at night if they are left in the bedroom. Kik and similiar messaging sites have also been known as hangouts for predators to try and connect with kids so they can talk privately.
T
witter enables the account holder to send and read 140 character 'tweets'. There is no need to accept or request friendships, you simply click and follow. (There is the ability to block people from your feed if you need to). Twitter is useful for finding people with similiar interests by use of Hashtags. Trolls and bullying can be a problem.
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he number one way to keep your kids safe on any social networking sites is to engage in ongoing conversation, have an understanding of the sorts of things your children are doing online, and be prepared to change the conversation and the rules as the kids and the technology changes. The privacy settings for social networking sites can be messy and indeed have been known to change with little warning. Whilst it is certainly a good idea to use them, it is an even better idea to think twice about what you are posting and who could potentially see it should your settings not be secure. Remember, there is no such thing as a ‘safe app’, there can only be safe users. So give your kids the skills and critical thinking to stay safe wherever they find themselves online. These rules may differ depending on your child’s age and maturity, but here are some guidelines you should already be talking about with your kids the moment they get any social networking account. • • • • • • • •
Photos must not be disrespectful or embarrassing to yourself or others. Turn off location services so your child is not advertising their exact location every time they post. Commenting on other photos must never be mean, nasty or bullying in any way. Liking or commenting on an inappropriate photo will generally mean ‘guilty by association’….. so don’t do it. No personal detail sharing such as the name of your school or where you live. Have photos set to private and only allow people you know in real life to follow you. Links to other usernames of social networks should not be shown in the profile. Ask permission before posting a pic of someone else online. Respecting oneself and respecting others must be the number one priority.
If you’d like more understanding, tips and strategies on helping your children navigate technology and the online, Martine has an ebook available on her website Parenting in a digital world: stop fighting, start connecting. Martine is passionate about helping parents face the challenges of the modern world. With a background in education and a Masters in Counselling, Martine uses her extensive professional experience in conjunction with the personal experiences of raising five children, to give a realistic approach to parenting today.
WWW.THEMODERNPARENT.NET july/august 2015
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parenting | with jo bainbridge
Social Media Vampires BY JO BAINBRIDGE
To be honest, I’m feeling knackered. Not because I’ve had a busy week, but because last night I was up until 2am watching the last few episodes of True Blood. Last night I was bingeing on a TV show until the early hours of the morning, last night I was doing what is now known as #vamping.
F
or many teenagers vamping takes the form or staying up until the early hours of the morning communicating with friends online through Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, texting, You-Tubing, TV show bingeing and so on. The trend of teenagers staying up late at night is often seen as a cliché. We forget, or maybe don’t know, that there is a chemical change happening in the brain during the teen years that rewires their body clocks, resulting in them not feeling tired at night. For many teenagers, not getting the full eight and a half hours sleep doesn’t seem like a big deal they believe they can function better on less sleep than we can. But sleep is important for us all, especially the developing brain and growing bodies of teens. But before we focus on the pitfalls of vamping, what we should actually ask is this: Is vamping really some new cyber-influenced syndrome, out to destroy our teens? I don’t know about you, but as a young person I was often guilty of hiding a torch under the bed so I could read all night. When I was given a phone (as in one that required being plugged into the wall) for my 17th birthday, yep you guessed it, I stayed up late talking to friends. I listened to music and practiced make up and hairstyles. I was being a typical teenager… staying up
late. So, vamping - a new syndrome? Or just a fancy name for a phase which generations of teenagers have wexperienced? I have three teenagers – aged 14, 16 and 18. They each have a phone and a laptop. They are what I would consider ‘normal’ level ‘screenagers’. They each have busy lives with school, band practice, part time work, VET courses, girlfriends and so on. Many teenagers have very busy schedules, often far busier than we were! I know many families where homework, sport, music, dance, volunteering, work commitments and so on can take up huge amounts of outside school hours. For many teens, bedtime is in fact the best time for actually catching up with friends on a social level. Interacting with friends is an essential part of teenage development. It is during this time that these new adults are learning social interactions and dynamics. Being online does not replace face-to-face interactions, but remember they get that from school, sport, after school activities and so on. I believe that cyber space does have something to add in terms of social interactions. Cyber space is a part of our reality now, they must learn how to ‘play nice’ and be safe. Online communication is now an accepted component of ‘hanging out’. But should that be at 3am? Not really.
GETTING ANGRY OR FRUSTRATED DOES NOT GET PARENTS ANYWHERE. CALM DISCUSSION PEPPERED WITH HUMOUR AND SPRINKLED WITH A LITTLE STIRRING IS THE MOST EFFECTIVE METHOD IN MY HOUSE.
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july/august 2015
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I have toyed with the idea of taking phones and laptops off the kids at night in an enforced curfew, but that doesn’t suit the way I parent. We talk about the importance of sleep and how late night interactions on social media can and will impact on the next day. My parenting style is not to ‘tell’ my teens what to do – seriously does anyone really think that works with teenagers?? But I will sure as hell make them drag their weary butts out of bed at 6.30am every school morning as required. When met with groans and moans of how tired they are, I rebut with a sarcastic “naw, maybe you can snapchat that crap tonight at 1am!” They get my point. Teen brains might not be fully developed in making rational decisions but the point can be made with consequences. Consequences: what we call “No Sh*t Sherlock” moments. The important thing for parents is to talk to their teens and explain that the consequences of lack of sleep can have very serious effects on not only school, but their overall health. Sleep deprivation is a recognised torture after all. Allow them to join the dots between vamping and feeling like crap the next
day. I do not believe in treating teenagers as children; they are adults in training. Getting angry or frustrated does not get parents anywhere. Calm discussion peppered with humour and sprinkled with a little stirring is the most effective method in my house. I challenge my teens to turn off a few days a week, most of the time they do. I make a point of noting how good they feel after a good night’s sleep. Our agreement on ‘vamping’ is it’s something they do on nights when they don’t have to get up for school the next day. (To be honest, being ‘allowed’ to do it has taken the shine off wanting to do it as well – see what I did there!) School nights maintain an agreed bedtime and lights off time. Now they make decisions about their behaviours and reap the benefits or suffer the consequences of those decisions. Just like I did today. Can someone grab me a coffee?
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IS VAMPING SOME NEW CYBER INFLUENCED SYNDROME OUT TO DESTROY OUR TEENS? I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT AS A YOUNG PERSON I WAS OFTEN GUILTY OF HIDING A TORCH UNDER THE BED SO I COULD READ ALL NIGHT.
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21
the BIG issue | domestic violence
Drawing The Line BY JULIET PANNOZZO
45. That’s the number of women killed so far this year as a result of domestic violence. At least, that’s the number at the time this publication went to print. It’s likely to be higher now, as this figure continues to grow weekly.
F
or many of us, the realities of domestic violence are not a part of our daily lives. We abhor domestic violence. We voice our despair and sorrow for victims whenever we see a news report of yet another death at the hands of someone’s supposed “loved one”. And we presume this underlying sense of disdain for domestic violence will trickle down to our children. “Surely they can see how wrong this is?” Perhaps we believe because there’s no violence within our own homes, that we don’t need to overtly talk to our children about this topic. They’ll just know. Right? They’ll always know where to “draw the line”? Apparently not. According to former Democrats Leader Natasha Stott Despoja, role modelling good relationships in your home is not enough to prevent your child from becoming another statistic. A long time campaigner for gender equality and Australia’s Ambassador for Women and Girls, Stott Despoja is now chair of Our Watch, an organisation working towards ‘an Australia where women and their children live free from all forms of violence’. Recent results from an Our Watch survey highlighted alarming attitudes about gender, sexual consent and violence against women among young people. Attitudes which may shock and contradict many parents’ beliefs.
THE UNSETTLING RESULTS
The survey of 3000 young people, aged 12 to 24 years, found the following: • 16-24 year olds are more likely to excuse domestic violence than other age groups. • One in four young males believe controlling and violent behaviours are signs of male strength. • One in three young people think exerting control over another person is not a form of violence. • One in four young people don’t think it’s serious if a guy, who’s normally gentle, sometimes slaps his girlfriend when he’s drunk and they’re arguing. • A quarter of young people think pressure for sex and male verbal harassment are normal.
SILENCE IS NO LONGER AN OPTION
Stott Despoja said the Our Watch survey highlights the fact parents aren’t openly talking to their children about relationships and sex. She believes parents could have a much stronger influence over their kids’ future relationships if they start talking now, to clearly articulate the message that violence doesn’t belong in loving relationships.
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Given today’s domestic violence excusers are potentially tomorrow’s perpetrators and victims, she wants parents to incorporate this issue to family conversations. Because if our children don’t hear this message from us, then potentially all they may hear is dubious information from dubious sources.
ROLE MODELLING GOOD RELATIONSHIPS IN YOUR HOME IS NOT ENOUGH TO PREVENT YOUR CHILD FROM BECOMING ANOTHER STATISTIC. EDUCATION IS KEY
The issue is further compounded for children living in highly dangerous situations, such as with an abusive parent. These children are often not even aware there’s anything wrong with a physical show of anger in the home. For this reason, Stott Despoja also feels strongly about domestic violence education being taught in schools. “Beyond basic anatomy and talk of STIs, relationship education is not covered adequately through the education system,” she said. What is clear is that young people form views about what is and isn’t acceptable in relationships long before they ever enter one. We also know that children actually do want to know about boundaries in relationships. “Young people desperately want information and guidance from people they look up to, especially parents and teachers,” said Stott Despoja. “Instead, they get information from their friends, pornography, media and popular culture role models. These settings can perpetuate gender stereotypes and condone and encourage violence.”
THE ROLE OF SOCIAL MEDIA
In an effort to counter this, Our Watch recently launched a large-scale initiative called The Line, a social marketing campaign focused on changing youth attitudes and behaviours that condone, justify or excuse violence against women. Stott Despoja said the campaign aims to help teens work out where their “line” is on violence, gender inequality, sexual consent, relationships and use of technology. “Through online articles, resources and a social media campaign The Line will challenge rigid gender roles, gender inequality and sexism, and encourage young people to break the cycle of violence,” she said. The campaign’s website www.theline.org.au and facebook
the BIG issue | domestic violence
YOUNG PEOPLE FORM VIEWS ABOUT WHAT IS AND ISN’T ACCEPTABLE IN RELATIONSHIPS LONG BEFORE THEY EVER ENTER ONE. page contain videos, tip sheets, quizzes and information to help young people work out where they stand on violence and gender stereotypes. It also understands the dangers to victims, and is cleverly designed with a ‘panic button’ that redirects the page immediately to a Google search, to escape prying eyes and avert danger.
THE ‘REAL MAN’ MYTH
The Line also aims to debunk gender stereotypes, which are often ingrained in children from a very early age - think ‘boys don’t show emotion apart from aggression’, or ‘girls should know their place’. To do this, they’ve enlisted the help of strong male role models as ambassadors for The Line. Among the ambassadors is Sydney Swans footballer, Luke Ablett, who is targeting his message at sporting clubs. He wants young men to know they don’t have to be ‘the big, tough, aggressive guy’ all the time. “We know that men’s violence against women, including family violence and sexual assault, is caused by gender inequality and adherence to stereotypical gender roles,” Mr Ablett said. “So, while these steps for sporting clubs might seem small and easy, they can have serious benefits in later life for the way that men and women interact with and respect each other” Juliet Pannozzo is the Editor of Communications at Mum Media Group, a digital media channel of seven magazine style sites, aimed at Australian women. Juliet lives in Adelaide with her husband and two young children and is passionate about gender and humanitarian issues.
If you or someone you know is impacted by sexual assault or family violence, call 1800RESPECT on
1800 737 732
or visit www.1800RESPECT.org.au In an emergency, call 000.
For more information on survey results and The Line project, visit
WWW.THELINE.ORG.AU To read more on Juliet’s personal response to this issue, visit
WWW.MUMSLOUNGE.COM.AU july/august 2015
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cover story | jodie oddy
Teens, trolls
&
TALKBACK BY SARAH HAUSLER
Jodie Oddy talks to Avery Editor Sarah Hausler about social media, trolls and bullying, and raising daughters in a world which has changed so dramatically since we were teenagers.
"We don’t really fight that much, but social media is the only thing that we really butt heads about.” As it is with parents these days, the conversation quickly turns to the subject of social media, and the intrinsic danger it poses in a teenager’s world.
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make-up JOSIE LINDSELL | hair SILA BROCK | photography NICOLE ASPINALL
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t’s 4pm on a Wednesday afternoon and Jodie Oddy has already been awake for more than 12 hours. As she sits on a stool in her kitchen, with her ‘just woken up and not yet happy to speak’ toddler in her lap, a hairdresser sets to work on her hair. Around her, a pair of stylists are re-arranging her living room for the photo shoot and somewhere down the hall, her teenage daughter is surreptitiously GHD’ing her pre-school daughter’s long wavy locks. Jodie simply takes it in her stride. Just another day in the Oddy household. Many of us know Jodie as the effervescent radio host and television reporter. It’s easy for us to forget she is also a mum, intent on raising happy, confident and resilient daughters. Certainly, at today’s photo shoot, Jodie is seamlessly merging her two worlds. There’s media personality Jodie, one half of Mix 102.3FM’s top-rating breakfast radio show with her co-host Mark ‘Soda’ Soderstrom, and regular television presenter for Channel 10 news and The Project. But there’s also the other Jodie. Wife to ice hockey champion, Greg Oddy, and mother to their daughters, Payton and Summer, and to Taylor, her daughter with previous husband, former Australian cricketer Greg Blewett. That’s the Jodie I’m most keen to meet today. The regular Adelaide mum who, just like thousands of other mums across the state, has a million hopes, dreams and fears for her children, and desperately wants to make the world a safer, better place for them to inherit.
cover story | jodie oddy
Well aware of the dangers of social media, bullying, online predators and trolls, Jodie is upfront about the rules governing social media when it comes to 14 year old Taylor. “The best way to keep her safe is to monitor, monitor, monitor,” says Jodie. “But whenever we have this discussion, she says to me ‘you’ve equipped me well enough to be able to deal with these things’, so hopefully that’s the case. “There’s been a couple of times where she’s tripped up and I’ve been very assertive in my reaction to that,” she says with that famous grin. “We don’t really fight that much, but social media is the only thing that we really butt heads about.” Clear household guidelines on usage and curfews are Jodie’s keys to eliminate as much mother-daughter drama as possible. She is privy to all social media passwords and occasionally conducts “spot checks” on Taylor’s devices at any given time. “I think Taylor perceives it as an invasion of privacy, where I perceive it as just keeping her safe,” she said. With the rapid-fire changes in technology and communication in the past decade, today’s parents are at a distinct disadvantage when it comes to supporting their children through the murky waters of social media usage and safety. Never before have a generation of parents had to deal with Instagram, Facebook and Snapchat. In this new media landscape, Jodie is open minded about the best ways to parent with regard to these topics, where there are no ground rules already set in place. “Unfortunately the nature of that is that things are going to go wrong, and all we can do is learn from that,” she says. A big believer in learning from your mistakes, this is also a core value she hopes to impart on her daughters. “Given my life and experience, my first message to them is that it’s okay to mess up - we’re all human,” she says. “I don’t mind what they do, as long
as they tell me. I want them to know that I trust them, and that it doesn’t matter if they veer off path, as long as they tell me.” She is also hopeful of fostering close bonds with her younger daughters, Payton, three, and Summer, two, as they move toward their teenage years, just as she has with Taylor, 14. “It was different with Taylor and I when she was young, as we were on our own, so it was just the two of us,” Jodie said. “I think that will make our bond down the track all the more stronger. I single-parented her for six years or so. She was my little buddy and it was just her and I against the world. “I feel like we’re closer for that.” While issues of bullying, “sexting” and domestic violence abound in a world where women are still hugely vulnerable, Jodie is hopeful her generation of parents can help this generation of teenagers to navigate the world safely. With changing the world such a mammoth task, Jodie knows it’s up to all of us to individually do what we can to raise resilient, capable and well adjusted children. “I think one of the greatest things we can teach them is to be comfortable in their own skin,” said Jodie. “I haven’t necessarily had that in my own life, and I’m trying to find ways to impart that message onto them. “Because it hasn’t been my experience, it makes me even more determined to make it theirs.” No stranger to bullying herself, Jodie specifically recalls a time she felt so defeated by the bullies, she began self-censoring her on-air persona in an attempt to avoid criticism. Of course it didn’t work, and all she achieved was the feeling she was no longer making good radio.
july/august 2015
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Jodie Oddy ON... Her daughter Taylor “My two favourite things about her are that she has a beautiful empathy for other people and she has a real quiet confidence about her.” Raising girls “I love girls, but I think it’s because I never had anything different. I don’t know what I’d do with a boy… anatomically for a start!” Cyberbullying “Its an epidemic at the moment. The internet is out of control – no-one’s governing it. You can literally jump on there and say whatever you want about whoever you want and there are no repercussions. That breaks my heart, especially for kids.” Media’s obsession with women’s appearance “The industry I work in is so appearance based and it’s quite competitive with the way you look. I don’t think it’s fair the disparity between the focus on the way a woman looks and the focus on the way a man looks. It’s such a double standard.” Domestic violence “We need to start addressing the mortality rates in this country with women at the hands of men. It’s unacceptable. I’m pretty sure it’s on a par with the road toll and look what we do in response to that. It sickens me the way some men treat women. We’ve come so far, but we still have so far to go. Let’s stop focusing on Kim Kardashian’s arse, and start worrying about things that really matter.” Feminism “I’m as big on it now as I have ever been, because I get really outraged at people thinking my girls don’t deserve opportunities because they have a vagina. It’s ridiculous. I think there’s enough women across the globe who have proved that we can do anything we set our minds to, as well as, if not better than men.”
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“You just can’t be vanilla in my job,” she said. “But that’s okay, because I don’t want to be vanilla. I’d rather be true to myself and be who I am. If that brings some trouble with it, then at least I can say, ‘well that’s me’!” In a world where public speaking outranks death on the list of most common fears, it’s impressive to consider just how much self-confidence it takes to get to this point. To be able to share personal stories and opinion over the airwaves every morning, and maintain such a ‘take it or leave it, this is who I am’ attitude is no easy feat. But while Jodie says she can now assuredly ignore the trolls who criticise her personality or opinions, comments about her appearance remain an Achilles heel. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it,” she says of the vitriol directed at her and her female colleagues for their physical appearance. “I try not to read it, but every now and then I’ll stumble across something and I think, ‘If you ran into me on the street, never in a million years would you say that to my face’, so I don’t know why people think that’s okay online. “I’m not asking anyone to judge me on the way I look. My job is about what I’m saying and the people that we talk to. “Who cares what I look like? It’s no-one’s business what I look like.”
“I would discourage my girls, in this day and age, to do anything in the limelight.” In the media industry, where appearance is paramount, Jodie knows too well the full impact of image based bullying on her contemporaries. She recounts a story of a high profile female friend she “almost lost”, after she spiralled into a significant depression following extreme bullying. It is for this reason she won’t be encouraging her daughters to move into a media role, despite the level of success and satisfaction she’s had in her own career. “I would discourage my girls, in this day and age, to do anything in the limelight,” she said. “You just get torn down, and it’s not nice to be on the receiving end of that.” Naturally protective of her children, Jodie says her public profile makes her even stricter with regulating Taylor’s social media usage. She’s cautious about how often she herself puts her daughters’ images out into the public arena. “I’m very wary of using their images online, where it’s open for people to make comment,” she said. “I want to protect them from that. You can have a pot-shot at me for whatever reason, but don’t attack my kids.” Despite these drawbacks, Jodie relishes the privilege of her position. With her words reaching the ears of up to 300,000 listeners each week, Jodie sees this as an opportunity, and indeed a responsibility, to make a difference and “do something worthwhile”. This is the impetus behind campaigns such as the Zero Bullying Pledge, which she and Soda launched earlier this year, to encourage young people to take a stand against bullying. “I think you get to that stage in life, when you get a little bit older, that you start to think a lot more about other people and how you can help them,” Jodie says. “You find a bit more purpose I guess, because quite often you’ve gotten to where you want to in your career and I think it’s a natural inclination to be a bit more empathetic and to try and see what you can do for other people, rather than for yourself. “I don’t think I’m alone in that, but that’s the stage that I’m at anyway.”
specialcover feature story | wellbeing | xxxxxx
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wellbeing HOW TO SUPPORT
risk-taking teens p28
meditation THE ANTIDOTE TO A FAST-PACED, TECHNOLOGY DRIVEN WORLD? p30
wellbeing family for the whole
We all want a healthy family. For many of us it’s the only thing that truly matters - the wellbeing of our loved ones. In this special wellbeing feature we’ve asked SA’s leading wellbeing experts to share their best advice for keeping your family well.
5 TIPS TO BEAT THE
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special feature | wellbeing
RISKY BUSINESS BY EMMA HOLDSWORTH
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special feature | wellbeing
We all know teens are more prone to taking risks than younger children or adults. As children move towards adolescence they have a natural tendency to seek new sensations and experience more ‘adult’ activity. These normal developmental tendencies, coupled with the remodelling that is occurring in the brain, can mean a young person is more likely to engage in risk-taking activity.
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arents are often at a loss as to how to deal with these risky behaviours, but it’s something many of us face regularly. So here are my three top tips for supporting your kids to take a more healthy approach to risks.
Encourage your child to become involved in an active, team based activity on the weekends.
This could be sport, drama, dance or any number of things, the benefits of which are twofold. Firstly, it allows your teen to experience risk in a supported environment - think of the adrenaline rush of racing down a mountain on a bike, running across a sports field toward the goal, or getting ready to go on stage in front of an audience. But there are also added benefits of having a team or group relying on them to show up on Saturday morning, such as reducing their desire to stay out late at parties, drink or use drugs.
Remember, you cannot control your teens. they need to want to do what you ask because they love and respect you.
Rule with Love
Teens, though they may push against it in a bid for independence, still need a lot of love and nurturing. Connecting with them any way you can is vital. Your relationship is the key to their successful navigation through the teen years. Remember, you cannot control your teens. They need to want to do what you ask, because they love and respect you. For this to happen, your teen needs to feel heard, loved and respected. Empathise with them, remember what it was like to be a teenager and to have all those big feelings swimming around inside you.
Teens have a tendency to be impulsive and not think about the consequences of their actions, or what other options may be available to them. Support them to make their own decisions
Involving your kids in decision making processes is a powerful strategy. If they want to do something, sit down with them and get them to think through their choices and the potential consequences of each option. Then let them make a decision based on these thought processes. Do this with younger children too, as the more this critical thinking is repeated, the more it becomes second nature to them. Teens have a tendency to be impulsive and not think about the potential consequences of their actions, or what other options may be available to them. Supporting their learning of this process can help them to minimise risky behaviour, or engage in safer risk-taking activities. Finally, don’t be too hard on your teens or yourself. While parenting teens is a hard gig, it can be tremendously rewarding and a lot of fun too. Do things together, have fun and don’t forget to have a laugh - at yourself is best!
Your teenager’s brain
Around puberty the human brain starts a process of remodelling. Connections in the brain which are not used or needed are ‘pruned’ away, while more utilised connections are strengthened. The human brain is remodelled in a sequence from the back to the front, leaving the prefrontal cortex until last. In fact, this part of the brain is not fully developed until early adulthood. The prefrontal cortex is often referred to as the “thinking” part of the brain, as it is responsible for decision making, planning, understanding consequences of actions and impulse control. While this part is still underdeveloped, teenagers may base their decisions more heavily on the “feeling’ part of their brain, the amygdala, which is more closely associated with emotions, impulses and instinctive behaviour.
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special feature | wellbeing BY JANE MILLER
I’m bored! It could be the mantra of the modern teenager. In our fast paced, technology driven world our kids are conditioned to expect constant external stimulation.
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ith hundreds of TV channels and movies on demand, constant pinging of messages on mobile phones, 101 different social media accounts to keep updated with the latest selfies, it’s a wonder they have time to get bored at all. Yet they still do. Unfortunately, our most common response as parents is to offer a list of alternative activities to stimulate our disgruntled offspring. “Why don’t you call a friend? Watch a movie. Take the dog for a walk….” We’re all conditioned to look outside ourselves – to do or to get something to satisfy this underlying sense of lack. But is this feeling of ‘not enough’ ever truly satisfied? Think for a moment about a situation where
your child plagued you morning and night for the latest toy or gadget. Do promises like “If you buy me this, I’ll never ask for another thing!” ring any bells? And how long after you bought this supposedly life changing item did that promise last?
need to ‘do’ or ‘have’. To paraphrase Ekhart Tolle, we are after all human ‘beings’, not human ‘doings’. Meditation helps us reconnect to our essential nature, to find the peace within and to find the truth that we are ‘enough’.
IN OUR FAST PACED, TECHNOLOGY DRIVEN WORLD OUR KIDS ARE CONDITIONED TO EXPECT CONSTANT EXTERNAL STIMULATION. Of course, it depends on the individual, and we are equally guilty of this as adults. Have you ever told yourself life will be better once you lose those last five kilos or you find the perfect partner? Ultimately, it’s an illusion. Nothing external in life will ever give us a permanent sense of satisfaction, because the sense of ‘enough’ has to come from within. It is not your circumstances which dictate your happiness, but how you relate to your circumstances. The practice of meditation helps us appreciate this, to learn how to ‘be’ in the world without the
These wise words from American author and teacher Marianne Williamson sum things up beautifully:
Ego says ‘Once everything falls into place I’ll feel peace’. Spirit says ‘Find your peace, then everything will fall into place.’ There are a range of different meditation techniques, from breath, to mantra, body sensing and visualisation. Different types of meditation appeal to different people, so it’s worth trying several approaches to find one that suits you. For young people, a combination of yoga and meditation often works well. Yoga gives teens the opportunity to burn off energy while also learning to draw their focus inwards. Numerous scientific studies have demonstrated the benefits of meditation for managing stress, anxiety and depression. But in my view, the greatest gift of meditation is learning how to simply ‘be’. Jane Miller is an internationally accredited Hatha Yoga teacher. She continues to develop her knowledge and commitment to the ancient practice of yoga as the science of living through her community yoga studio, Yoga Indra.
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special feature | wellbeing
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special feature | wellbeing
Beat the winter bugs BY JESS DONOVAN, NATUROPATH
Having a sick household can make for a long and dreary winter. When one person in the family gets sick, the germs often end up engulfing the entire tribe. But sickness isn’t inevitable and there are certainly things you can do to protect your family from the dreaded lurgy this winter. We asked our resident naturopath, Jessica Donovan, for her top five tips to boost your family’s immunity and wellbeing during these cooler months.
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Nourish with nutrients
Food does not necessarily equate to nutrients, in fact many of the foods that line the supermarket shelves these days are so low in nutrition they shouldn’t even be called food! Our kids are often attracted to these processed and nutrient depleted foods and eating high amounts of them can compromise their health. Our immune system is fuelled by nutrients found in fresh, whole foods so packing as many of these as we can into our diet makes sense.
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Try including • Brightly coloured fruits and vegetables such as blueberries, kiwi fruit, baby spinach, beetroot and sweet potato to boost your antioxidant levels including vitamin A,E,C, and Zinc. • Superfoods such as Goji berries, camu camu, raw cacao, turmeric, garlic and ginger, which all add power to our immune system. • After school smoothies are a great snack idea and you can pack as many of these brightly coloured fruits, vegetables and superfoods into the blender as possible. • Organic produce, as it is higher in these immune boosting antioxidants.
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Safeguard your gut
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The link between our gut health and immune system is strong, in fact around 80 percent of our immune system is located in our gut! Bloating, constipation, heartburn or irritable bowel type symptoms are all signs your gut needs some attention, and your immune system is probably not in optimum health either. The number of bacteria we have in our bodies outnumbers our cells, so you could argue we are more bacteria than ourselves! It is when the ‘good and bad’ bacteria become unbalanced that we can experience both digestive upset and lowered immunity. There are many things in a teenager’s modern lifestyle that contribute to this imbalance, including sugar and processed foods, study and social stress, antibiotics and other medications. To boost the levels of beneficial bacteria in the gut try adding to your family diet fermented foods such as yoghurt, kombucha and homemade sauerkraut. A good quality probiotic supplement can also help to restore gut health.
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Knock back some broth
There’s nothing better than a bowl of steaming hot chicken soup when we’re sick, and there’s good reason for that. Chicken broth is, of course, good for our soul, but it is also tremendously nourishing for our bodies. Bone broths contain ample amounts of important minerals such as calcium, magnesium and potassium. They also contain gelatine which aids digestion and is fantastic for joint health. Bone broths are a great staple to have on hand in winter, they make delicious bases for soups, sauces, slow cooked meals and casseroles. They also eliminate the need for commercial stocks in carton or powdered forms, which usually have undesirable ingredients. You can make a big batch and freeze so there is always some on hand – check out my recipe on this page.
Snub the sugar
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Many teens have an insatiable appetite for sugar, which can have detrimental effects on their immunity. Sugar can be likened to a ‘chill pill’ for the immune system, it reduces the activity of white blood cells, making them so relaxed they don’t have the energy to fight the viruses and bacteria that surround us in winter. Avoiding sugar involves more than just not adding it to your tea, coffee and breakfast cereal. Almost every food in a packet will have some form of sugar added to it – cane sugar, sucrose, glucose, dextrose, corn syrup are all names for sugar. The best way to avoid excess sweet stuff in your diet is to eat more “real food”, such as vegetables, fruit, salad, nuts, seeds, whole grains, eggs, fish and meat. “Real food” is food as it was meant to be eaten, straight from plants or animals, and as close to its natural state as possible.
Soak up the sunshine
Vitamin D is an essential nutrient for our immune system and we soak it up through exposure to the sun. Sounds easy when we live in one of the sunniest countries in the world, but Vitamin D deficiency is a major health concern in Australia, particularly in the winter months. Encourage your kids to get off the computer and get outside in the midday sun every day. Go for a walk or simply sit outside to eat your lunch. Expose some skin – roll your jumper sleeves up and take off your sunglasses and scarf to really soak up some Vitamin D goodness.
special feature | wellbeing
Chicken Broth Recipe 1 whole free-range chicken* Cold filtered water 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar 1 large onion, coarsely chopped 2 carrots, peeled/coarsely chopped 3 celery stalks, coarsely chopped Place chicken in a large stainless steel pot and cover with filtered water. Add the apple cider vinegar and all vegetables, and let stand for 30 minutes. Bring to a boil, and remove any scum that rises to the top. Reduce heat, cover and simmer for 6 to 8 hours. You can remove the chicken meat after about 3 hours if you wish, but put all of the bones back into the broth. The longer you cook the stock, the richer and more flavourful it will be. Strain the stock into a large bowl. You can use immediately or store the stock in covered containers in your refrigerator or freezer.
Immune building Chicken, noodle and vegetable soup Meat from 1 chicken, reserved from making broth 1 onion, 2 carrots, 2 sticks of celery 6 cloves garlic 1 teaspoon each dried rosemary/oregano 1-2 tablespoons turmeric 2 litres chicken broth 3 cups cauliflower, 2 zucchinis Soba noodles Saute onion, carrot and celery until softened. Add garlic, fry off for a minute then add broth. Stir in cauliflower and zucchini. Season with salt and pepper, herbs and spices. Bring to the boil, then simmer for 15 minutes. Add the soba noodles and cooked chicken to warm through before serving.
*Note: For the best imune boosting properties, use only farm-raised, free-range chicken.
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special feature | wellbeing
too much. too soon?
BY SARAH HAUSLER
We’ve seen the footage of two-year-old Tiger Woods swinging golf clubs like a pro. And we’ve heard the story of Serena Williams’ gruelling pre-school tennis training regime, coached by a father determined to raise champion daughters.
F
or these exceptional athletes, a focus and commitment to their chosen sport from an exceptionally young age has certainly paid dividends. Arguably two of the greatest and highest paid sportspeople in the world, Serena has taken out 20 individual Grand Slam titles, while Tiger has amassed an incredible 79 PGA Tour wins. When we see such grand achievements juxtaposed against early life sport specialisation, it seems a natural conclusion that the earlier a child focuses on their sport of choice, the more success they’re likely to have. Tiger and Serena are champions because they started so early. Right? But is this really the case? To be great athletes, do our children need to specialise in one sport from an early age? Or is it better to experience a wide range of sports in those formative years? Local wellbeing experts favour the latter – suggesting that, not only is early specialisation not a good predictor of elite success, but that it can actually have negative impacts on children’s physical and emotional development. According to Dr Sam Elliott, Lecturer in Sport, Health and Physical Activity and member of the SHAPE Research Centre, there are two main concerns when it comes to early sports specialisation – the child’s overall physical and sporting development, and the risk of burnout. He said early specialisation – focusing on one particular sport to the exclusion of all others, could have detrimental effects on a child’s physical development and skills attainment. “Despite numerous case studies at the elite level, which suggest that early specialisation leads to sports expertise, there is a substantive amount of evidence which suggests that early diversification is most important from a developmental perspective,” Dr Elliott said. Far from being an impediment, Dr Elliott suggests diversification of sporting participation until at least the age of 12 can actually lead to an increased skill set and overall sporting prowess. “There is an accumulative effect from the volume of time spent in sports generally,” he said. “So while a child may want to play AFL, they might also sample soccer, rugby and basketball.
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“This in turn accelerates technical and tactical proficiency, which is critical as they progress into specialisation later on.” Running parallel to this issue of physical development and skills acquisition is the potential for the young sportsperson to sustain injury through early specialisation. Dr Elliott again suggests the answer to this is to encourage a wide range of activities. “This risk (of injury) can be reduced by an emphasis on unstructured, creative play and early diversification of sport experiences during the formative years,” he said. As it also is for adults, the risk of injury to a young person is increased when the chosen sport requires repetitive, asymmetric movement, such as hurdles, golf or racquet sports, which can lead to muscle imbalance. Additionally, injuries can occur when training regimes place unbalanced demands on a person’s anatomy and physiology, such as skipping flexibility, core strength or cardiovascular training. Physiotherapist and Director of Smart Health and Training Services, Jenni Guest, said careful programming was required to reduce the risk of injury and increase the potential short and long term
special feature | wellbeing performance of young athletes, whose bodies are still developing on a physical and physiological level. The key to keeping children injury free was based less on the type of sport they choose to play, but the inclusion of a well rounded training regime. This, she said, should focus on correct warm up and cool down, bilateral training, addressing both core and global muscles, cardiovascular fitness, endurance and ballistic training, as well as flexibility, appropriate strength training and even relaxation techniques. “Asymmetrical training can cause muscle imbalance which could possibly then cause asymmetrical torsion through the skeletal system resulting in misalignment”, Ms Guest said. “We need a range of exposure to different movements in planes of movement, covering all muscle groups, using both sides equally”. She also warned against repetitive training, which could lead to overuse injuries such as tendonitis, tendonopathy and bursitis. She particularly encourages care with weight training in the pre-pubescent years – where she advises to keep loads lighter until the bone growth plates and muscle fibres are ready to bear heavier loads. This is where coaches and trainers play a vital role in this equation, with their level of competence and expertise a primary factor in injury prevention. “We need to look at the techniques used by the coach,” Ms Guest said.
“We need to ensure they have correct first aid and sport trainer training, understand the developmental needs of the adolescent bodies and also even understand changes that occur through puberty as well as managing psychological developments through puberty.” As touched on here, it’s not just about physical development. A child’s emotional wellbeing should also be considered when it comes to sport specialisation, particularly with regard to the issue of ‘burnout’ and early drop out from sports. It may be difficult to contemplate a 13 year old suffering from “While the natural burnout, but Dr Elliott progression in sport said it is a very real risk leads to specialisation for children guided into in one or sometimes early specialisation by two sports, early well-meaning parents or specialisation has coaches. “While the natural been found to predict progression in sport discontinuation.” leads to specialisation - Dr Sam Elliott in one or sometimes two sports, early specialisation has been found to predict discontinuation,” Dr Elliott says. “From a sociocultural perspective, an issue emerges where elite athletes such as Tiger Woods attribute their elite status to early specialisation.
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special feature | wellbeing “This may reinforce to parents that dedication to one sport is more likely to lead to elitism. Increasingly however, the evidence in this area, and most player biographies, indicate the importance of playing a variety of sports during the sampling years, from six to12 years old.” So at what age is specialisation appropriate? Dr Elliott suggests somewhere in the early teenage years, dependent upon individual circumstances. “If the child is ego-oriented and intrinsically motivated by individual success, then perhaps it may occur earlier, but for most children, 12 to 15 years [is appropriate].” And far from Mr Williams’ hardline stance with his tennis prodigy daughters, Dr Elliott recommends a more flexible approach to parents’ involvement in their children’s sport – both on and off the field. He suggests parents pay more attention to reading their children’s mood, needs and wants during situations such as practices, game time and the post-game critique. “The biggest issue for parents is that they often adopt very rigid approaches to youth sport,” he said. “The current evidence indicates that parents need to be more flexible with the nature of their involvement, and this can change from week to week and season to season.” Family counsellor, Emma Holdsworth of Tree House Family Counselling said ‘burnout’ could take many forms, and parents concerned about this in their children should be on the lookout for symptoms. These include loss of enjoyment in the sport, or in anything but the sport,
resistance to or negative emotional response to attending the sport, loss of motivation for the sport or loss of motivation more generally, physical injury or complaints of pain. She highlights communication as the most important tool for parents of children moving into specialised sport, at any age. “Listen to your child,” says Ms Holdsworth. “Make sure they continue to enjoy their sport and keep the lines of communication open so they feel comfortable to share their feelings about it with you. “If your child feels they are specialising for your sake, rather than their own enjoyment, or feel pressure from parents to continue, they will be unlikely to approach you with their feelings about it. “Focus on staying connected with them by listening, empathising, and including them in decision making.”
Symptoms of ‘burnout’
• loss of enjoyment in the sport • loss of enjoyment in anything but the sport • resistance to or negative emotional response to attending the sport • loss of motivation for the sport • loss of motivation more generally • physical injury or complaints of pain
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Take a look at your teenagers face. Is there a clear pattern of acne breakouts in certain areas? Check the diagram to see what might be behind the breakout, and what you can do to overcome it.
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special feature | wellbeing
BY OLIVIA JENKINS
what is your teen's face telling you? There’s no quick fix for acne, but there are things you can do to help. I’m a huge advocate for implementing better nutrition and lifestyle choices, to help clear skin from the inside out. But it always helps to have a few clues as to the reasons why your teen is suffering from acne in the first place. This is where the ancient art of face mapping can be useful for helping find the cause of acne.
Zones 1 & 3: The Digestive System
Zones 5 & 9: The Respiratory System
Zone 2: The Liver
Zones 11 & 13: The Hormones
High amounts of bad fats contribute to breakouts in this area. Cleaning up your teen’s diet is crucial if they’re experiencing this sort of acne. Try encouraging them to drink a poly-phenol rich green tea and remind them to up their water intake to clear this zone! If your teenager’s liver is struggling, acne will pop up here. It has been said that alcohol and intolerance to dairy are the main causes of breakouts in this area. If you’re concerned about food sensitivities, it’s a great idea to have an allergy test done to rule out any dietary concerns.
Zones 4, 6, 8 & 10: The Kidneys
Acne close to the ears and dark circles around the eyes can be caused by dehydration. Make sure your teen is keeping well hydrated and drinking at least eight glasses of water per day. Try adding fresh berries or citrus fruit to make drinking water more interesting.
Zone 7: The Heart
This area of the face is filled with pores so make sure anything coming into contact with it is clean. Reduce ‘bad’ fats in their diet and add more fruit, veggies, nuts and fish. Make simple changes like swapping dessert for a fruit salad and hot chips for oven-baked fries.
If teens are anxious (such as during exam time) you may notice breakouts along the top of their cheeks. Simple stress management strategies like getting lots of fresh air, taking regular study breaks and going for daily walks outdoors can help this part of their complexion. Acne in this zone is a key indicator of hormonal imbalance, particularly around ‘that time of the month’ for our girls. Reduce refined sugar, dairy and exfoliate regularly in the lead up to their monthly cycle.
Zone 12: The Stomach
If your teen’s tummy has been exposed to rich and heavy foods, it could show up here. Try including freshly squeezed juice into their diet, avoiding processed foods and drinking lots of water. A daily dose of psyllium husk will give their body the fibre it needs to keep this area perfectly clear.
Zone 14: The Immune System
Acne in this area indicates a body trying to fight off bacteria or an infection. If your teen is sick, make sure they are drinking a lot of water to flush out toxins and allow time for them to rest, relax and recover. Olivia Jekins is a certified health coach, nutritionist and creator of the ‘Clear Skin Project’. She is passionate about helping people overcome problematic skin issues.
WWW.OLIVIAJENKINS.COM.AU july/august 2015
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special feature | wellbeing
there’s an app for that!
From Fitbits to Garmins and iWatches, the onslaught of wearable health gadgets has well and truly arrived, bringing with it a multitude of health and wellbeing apps.
BY SARAH HAUSLER
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special feature | wellbeing
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e can now track, record and monitor almost every conceivable health metric, with just the touch of a button or the shake of a wrist. But are health apps really all they’re cracked up to be? Can they really make us healthier or are they just a “fitspo” gimmick? We spoke to Kristy Schirmer, Principal Consultant of social media and health promotion consultancy firm Zockmelon, to help us answer this question, and to determine why health apps are so rapidly increasing in popularity. “Health apps are the way of the future,” Kristy said. “Apps and devices like the FitBit enable people to collect huge amounts of data about themselves, which provides ongoing feedback on any positive or negative behaviour changes. Often the apps then display collected data in beautiful and shareable formats. They are items of selfknowledge and self-expression.
Self-monitoring can become obsessive and unhealthy and in young people this can be quite dangerous. “But, purely and simply they can be fun to use! They tick all the boxes in terms of having the novelty factor, they’re interactive, they do something useful, and there’s also the status symbol element, especially with wearable tech.” However, Kristy also advises caution and encourages parents to role model good behavior in this arena, as well as monitoring potential overuse of apps and devices. “Just like it’s important for parents not to obsess over scales or their weight and promote positive body image, it’s important that parents aren’t seen to be too obsessive over their health apps,” she said. “Self-monitoring can become obsessive and unhealthy and in young people this can be quite dangerous.” With an unlimited number of health apps currently on the market, Kristy also encourages diligence when it comes to choosing which apps you and your teens use. “Be sure to check the apps out first,” she advises. “Are they actually designed with children and young people in mind or are they for adults? Young people have different needs to adults in terms of physical activity guidelines and nutritional intake. “I would also advise parents to keep your kids away from playing games or using apps that promote junk food branding or advertising. “Finally, keep an eye on their social media use and in particular the use of any dangerous body image hashtags like #thinspo.”
So which apps can you safely download for your family? Kristy and the Avery team share their top 10 health and wellbeing apps.
Geocaching
Geocaching gets young people and their families outdoors and being active.
Foodswitch
Get your kids to scan items and then find healthier products. They might willingly swap when whey find out how much salt, sugar and kJs their current favourite contains.
Smiling Mind
This app promotes mindfulness through meditation for ages seven through to adults.
iMatter
Developed in conjunction with Australian of the Year, Rosie Batty, iMatter is designed to help young women understand the warning signs of abusive relationships.
The Check In app
Designed by Beyond Blue in consultation with young people, to help take the fear out of having a conversation with a friend who might be struggling.
@ppreciate a mate
Create inspirational quotes and share with friends or on social media.
Waterlogged
If you’re not drinking enough water, this app helps to keep your hydration levels up with charts and reminders.
Period Tracker Lite
A simple and cute period tracker that logs and predicts menstrual cycles, ovulation, moods and more.
You by Jamie Oliver
Daily micro-actions to a happier, healthier life through inspiration and support.
Mind Body Connect
Discover fitness and health services near you such as yoga and pilates classes, massage therapists and allied health practitioners.
july/august 2015
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in the kitchen | Stephanie Alexander
in the kitchen with the
Stephanie
photograph JAMES GRANT
Alexander
Kitchen Garden Foundation These warming winter recipes from the Stephanie Alexander Kitchen Garden Foundation are a great opportunity to spend an afternoon cooking with your children. They taste even better if you have grown the produce yourself, so why not get out in the garden this weekend too!
leek & broccoli tart Serves 6 Pastry Ingredients 200g plain flour, plus extra for dusting ½ tsp salt 1½ tbsp extra-virgin olive oil ½ cup cold water
Filling Ingredients 2 tbsp olive oil 2 leeks, finely chopped large head broccoli, chopped into florets 3 eggs, plus 1 yolk to glaze
This recipe will show you how to make and use rough puff pastry for a beautiful, warm, golden vegetable and cheese pie.
60ml reduced-fat or regular cream 250g ricotta cheese 100g parmesan, grated salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste 1 tbsp parsley and 1 pinch grated nutmeg
What to do for the pastry
Combine flour and the salt in a large bowl, and create a well in the middle of the flour. Combine the oil and water in a small bowl. Pour the mixture into the well. Use your hands to incorporate the liquid into the flour until the dough forms a ball. Flour the workbench. Transfer the dough to the workbench and knead for a minute, then place the dough into a large bowl. Cover with a dry tea towel and leave for an hour. How to make the filling
Preheat the oven to 200°C. Heat the oil in a frying pan over medium heat. Add the leek and broccoli, cook for about 5 minutes until the leek begins to soften and starts to colour. Remove the leek and broccoli. In a large bowl, lightly whisk the eggs and cream together, then mix in the ricotta, leek, broccoli and parmesan. Season with nutmeg, salt and pepper. Flour the workbench then roll pastry until 5–10mm, any shape is fine. Place the pastry onto an oiled baking tray. Spoon the mixture onto the centre of the pastry, leaving a 5cm border around the outside. Lift and push the border over the edge of the filling. Beat the egg yolk in a small bowl with a fork. Brush the pastry with the beaten egg yolk, then bake the tart for 35–40 minutes, or until golden. Sprinkle the tart with chopped parsley and freshly ground black pepper. Cut into portions and serve.
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Recipes from the Stephanie Alexander Kitchen Garden Foundation. Find out how your child’s school can join the Kitchen Garden Classroom at kitchengardenfoundation.org.au
in the kitchen | Stephanie Alexander
spiced cauliflower & chickpea masala Serves 6 Ingredients small piece ginger 3 garlic cloves 1 onion 800g cauliflower ½ cup peanut or vegetable oil 1 teaspoon mustard seeds
1 teaspoon cumin seeds ½ teaspoon ground turmeric 2 long green chillies 440g can chickpeas 440g tinned chopped tomatoes ½ teaspoon salt handful of coriander sprigs
Join the Kitchen Garden Classroom!
This colourful dish can be served as part of an Indian-inspired meal with other side dishes, or it could just as well be part of the accompaniments to a Western-style barbecue.
styling SARAH SHANAHAN | photography NICOLE ASPINALL
What to do
Finely chop the ginger and garlic, halve and thinly slice the onion and chop the cauliflower into florets. Heat the peanut oil in a large non-stick frying pan over medium heat. Add mustard seeds and wait a few seconds until they start to pop. Add ginger, garlic, cumin, turmeric and onion and stir with a wooden spoon until the onion is well softened (about 8 minutes). Add the cauliflower and turn with tongs until every piece is well coated with the spice mixture. Slice the chilli in half length-ways and scrape the seeds out then slice finely. Add the chickpeas, tomatoes, chilli and salt to the pan. Stir to mix, then cover with the lid. Cook for 8-10 minutes, stirring once or twice until cauliflower is just tender. Serve scattered with coriander sprigs.
‘Education should be for life. The kitchen garden classroom offers food experiences that will influence and inform the rest of their lives.’ Stephanie Alexander
Discover how your child’s school can join, visit: www.kitchengardenfoundation.org.au july/august 2015
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education | teacher meetings
step into the
Principal’s Office BY ANNIE HARVEY
Have you ever come out of a meeting with your child’s teacher and felt like it was an enormous waste of time?
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id you just hear a barrage of ‘teacher speak’ you didn’t understand? Perhaps you left more confused than when you arrived? Did you only remember the important questions you wanted to ask when you got home? My husband and I run a tutoring business and we have spoken to many parents who say just this. They tell us teachers’ comments appear generic, there isn’t enough time for proper discussion or to really understand, and teachers don’t seem as open and honest as they could be, especially with the child present. Is this all true? Some of it, perhaps, but it’s certainly not the full story. Let’s look at it from the teacher’s perspective. They are responsible for creating 40 weeks worth of material to support the Australian curriculum, and then spend those 40 weeks managing the behaviour and learning of 25 or more children. Not easy. In that time their classrooms will produce forests of learning output, from daily lessons, homework, projects and tests. Not to mention the reams of paperwork from their own meetings, committees, session plans and feedback to children and parents. They will also spend countless hours marking and correcting, analysing results, trying to understand the relative progress of each child and working to improve it. All this is not just for 40 weeks, but during the ‘holidays’ too, because you can’t enter a classroom without a plan in place.
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Now imagine that as a teacher you are asked to cram all of that planning, classroom management, marking and correcting, collating and reporting, in to a 10 minute discussion with parent and child? Teachers want to help, they really do. No one enters the teaching profession expecting to be rich or famous. You have to have an absolute passion for improving kids’ lives. But the reality is they are very busy people, running what amounts to a small business with 25 or more unruly and demanding employees. So, my suggestion is we treat teachers as business partners, the business being the education of our children. Those of you who work in, or run a business will no doubt attend regular meetings. I’m sure you plan for those meetings, perhaps have a list of questions ready to ensure that no time is wasted. So why not do the same for a teacher meeting? Here’s a list of suggested questions for parents to ask teachers. Be selective as you won’t have time for more than a few. Also try and come up with some of your own. Take a notepad with the questions written down, and take note of the answers, or use a smartphone or dictaphone to record it, with the teacher’s permission of course.
Can I tell you about what’s going at home? eg. illness, divorce, new sibling, etc.
How is my child doing socially? What are her peer relationships like? How about my child’s emotional health?
In what areas does my child need improvement?
What are my child’s strengths?
Is my child performing to grade level? Can I see examples of his work?
What about effort? Is my child doing her best? Can you suggest any books I can buy her? How do I choose them?
Does my child need extra help in any areas?
What are my child’s special goals in his IEP? (Individual Education Plan – for those receiving special ed)
How can I help at home? How can I support classroom activities?
What’s the best way to contact you – email, text, note in the diary?
What strategies do you use if you feel my child is struggling in class?
What are the most important concepts my child needs to understand by the end of the year?
How do you incorporate creativity, innovation and critical thinking into your classes?
How is testing designed to promote learning rather than measurement?
What aren’t I asking, that I should be?
ADVERTISEMENT
TEACHING STUDENTS TO BE THEMSELVES What is it about society that says it is not cool to sing and dance in public or to simply read from an old piece of technology – a book. The constant bombardment from social media and technology has certainly changed the way our children interact with each other and how they see the world.
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ecently, I read the children’s book, Edward the Emu and was reminded of the importance of being yourself. In the book Edward moves around the zoo looking to be another animal until he realizes that being an emu is actually the best animal to be. So what does that mean for our young people? Adolescence is an intriguing time of development and certainly a time when we should be able to celebrate being ourselves. Yet the pressures of society make it very difficult to stand out from the crowd. The moment we do something different it is tweeted, posted or snap-chatted to people who know us and people who we have never met. Our opportunity to be ourselves has been lost to the social media world. With this knowledge we become scared to stand out for fear of what others will say when they see the images, or posts about us. At Pedare Christian College we embrace uniqueness and look at every individual in our care as a precious person with unlimited potential.
In the Middle School we offer our students as many opportunities as possible to express their knowledge and understanding through the wide variety of subjects we offer. Whether it be on the sports field, in the science laboratory or the industrial kitchen we want to find the unique gifts each of our students have and help them to fulfil their potential. We believe that education is a gift that we offer our young people and will ultimately lead to success with the right care and support. Developing the skills to be yourself is part of the holistic education offered at Pedare. Just like Edward the Emu, we want our students to discover and understand that being yourself is the best gift you can offer the world. When we are being our best we can help to influence and improve the world we live in each day. David Nolan Head of Middle School Pedare Christian College
‘At Pedare Christian College we embrace uniqueness and look at every individual in our care as a precious person with unlimited potential’. David Nolan, Head of Middle School (pictured below) Join us for a Tour on Wednesday 12 August, 5:00pm. Personal tours are available by appointment. To reserve your place please contact our Community Relations Manager, Julie Holland. Ph: 08 8280 1700 or via email: community@pedarecc.sa.edu.au
www.pedarecc.sa.edu.au
Pedare Christian College, 2-30 Surrey Farm Drive, Golden Grove, Adelaide, Australia, 5125 I Ph:08 8280 1700
SHARE I BELONG I SUCCEED july/august 2015
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finance | parents
Money. Marriage. Divorce?
Money has a well-deserved reputation for being able to drive a wedge into even the strongest relationships, and the way you handle financial pressure as a couple can highlight important strengths, or weaknesses, in your relationship.
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ometimes the way we spend, the way we save, and the way each person in a couple handles their financial resources individually can fuel the flames of irritation in their other half. It makes for a complicated issue, and just to add to that complexity, the way we manage our money and our attitude towards it, often go right back to our childhood and our upbringing. It’s then further shaped by personal life experiences. The key point is that, with so many factors shaping our attitudes and approaches to personal finance, there’s no real reason why a couple who may be compatible in every other respect will see eye to eye on money matters.
For many couples, a budget is a key tool in breaking the cycle of living from pay packet to pay packet.
paul's top tips for discussing & managing money in your relationship: Start on a positive note, find common ground
Aim to start conversations about money on a positive note. Try leading in with something as simple as discussing your shared or personal goals. Ask your partner what he or she hopes to be doing in five, ten or 20 years. The point is to find a common ground you can both agree on – even if those goals seem incredibly distant or unachievable at this stage – and to start thinking positively about money and where it can get you.
Divide ‘money chores’ . . .
If you’re the ‘saver’ in the relationship, it can be tempting to point the finger of blame at your partner if there’s not
community based, family focussed www.herns.com.au | 8344 6011 21 Alfred Street, Walkerville SA 5081
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With so many factors shaping our attitudes and approaches to personal finance, there’s no real reason why a couple who may be compatible in every other respect will see eye to eye on money matters.
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enough money to pay the bills. This problem can be avoided by choosing a designated bill-payer. If you’re happy to take on this role – and your spouse agrees – aim to store all your bills in one spot, make a calendar note of when they’re due for payment, and note on each bill when and how (cheque, BPAY or direct debit) they were paid.
. . . but stay involved
That said, one thing I strongly caution against is handing over complete control of the household finances to your spouse or partner. Maintaining a savings account and even a credit card of your own lets you preserve your ‘financial identity’. In other words, it gives you a documented record through your account statements of the way you save and handle credit. This will stand you in good stead if the relationship doesn’t last the distance and you need to apply for a loan or any type of credit in your name in the future.
See the big picture with a budget
It’s worth taking the time to draft a household budget. It provides a blueprint for how you can manage debt, increase your wealth by saving and investing, or simply achieving the very worthwhile goal of living within your means. A budget can be a tremendous tool for reducing arguments over money, because it will show exactly how much money
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finance | parents
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you have to meet essentials, bills and debt repayments, as well as pinpointing how much cash you should have left over each week, month or year for investing or meeting lifestyle needs. For many couples, a budget is a key tool in breaking the cycle of living from pay packet to pay packet, because it highlights where you’re overspending and where you can cut back to free up extra cash.
Track everyday spending
Most of us have a fair idea of our expenses when it comes to annual outgoings like car registration or council rates; however, it can be the small, day-to-day spending that saps your budget. Low-value items can quickly add up. The daily cappuccino and takeaway lunch, Friday-night beers at the pub or even a weekly lotto ticket can really make a dent in your cash flow, especially if they’re part of your regular spending pattern. Keeping a spending diary for a week or a month is a great way to see where your loose change is going and to discover the true impact of little-but-often expenses.
* This article is an excerpt from Paul Clitheroe’s new book “Money, Marriage and Divorce”, available nationally through Penguin Books. Paul Clitheroe is one of Australia’s most respected financial advisors and finance writers.
Is your child still struggling at school? Does it make sense to keep doing more of the same? Would it be worthwhile investigating a different approach? We use advanced brain technologies to help with ADD/HD, ASD, CAPD, dyslexia, developmental delays, learning difficulties, moods, OCD, PTSD, sleep, TBI.
Help make this year a success. Contact us now. advanced brain technologies. Help. Faster.
www.dyslexiaclinic.com.au
(08) 7127 4938 july/august 2015
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finance | teens
Bringing Home the Bacon BY MARIA KESZLER
Is your teenager looking for their first job? Starting paid work for the first time can be exciting for teens and earning their own money certainly provides an element of financial freedom. But with a job also comes responsibility. We asked our finance expert Maria Keszler, for her top tips on guiding your teen through this process. Get a Tax File Number
Before applying for any jobs your teen must apply for a Tax File Number. Anyone can apply for a Tax File Number at any time from birth, and the number supplied will be your Tax File Number for life. Visit the Australian Tax Office website at www.ato.gov.au to complete a Tax File Number Application online.
Got the Job? Now for the Paperwork
When your teen first starts work there will be paperwork to deal with. They will need to complete a Tax File Number declaration form and a superannuation form supplied by their employer. They are eligible for superannuation if they are employed full time, part time or casual, are paid more than $450.00 in wages before tax in a calendar month, or work more than 30 hours in a week. They will also need to set up their own bank account if they don’t already have one. They should also be clear about how much they will be earning per hour and whether it is the correct amount. If in doubt check out the Fair Work Australia website at www.fairwork.gov.au/pay/ minimum-wages which covers all industries and apprenticeship wages.
Why did they take some of my money?
It’s important that your teen receives a payslip when they get paid, and understands what they are reading. The payslip should show them how much they earned (before and after tax), the number of hours they worked, any penalty hours and rates they have worked, how much superannuation the employer has paid into their super fund, and the amount of tax deducted. If your child or teen earns more than $416.00 in a financial year, they should lodge a tax return as they may be subject to pay tax, depending on the source of income. If their income is from employment and below the tax threshold (approximately $20,000) they will most likely receive a refund at tax time.
Now I can spend it!
Whilst it might be fun to blow that first pay after getting their hands on all that hard-earned cash, it’s imperative this doesn’t become a habit. Learning how to budget money is a valuable skill, best learned early. It’s good for teens to have a long term money goal such as saving for a car, holiday or house deposit. They may also contribute to the family finances like helping out with their mobile phone bill, buying clothes or paying ‘board’. In this world of technology you can easily track your money from your smartphone, through a range of budgeting and banking apps.
It’s good for teens to have a long term money goal such as saving for a car, holiday or house deposit There’s an app for that! Get your teen using their smartphone for something truly useful with the ASIC MoneySmart Track My Spend app. This app helps you keep track of your budget through features which allow you to nominate a spending limit, identify needs and wants and create bill payment reminders.
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General Advice Warning: Please note that the advice provided is general advice only as, in preparing it, we did not take into account your financial situation or particular needs. Please seek professional advice before making financial decisions.
july/august 2015
special feature | travel
The Great South Australian
ROAD TRIP! You’ve heard it’s not the destination but the journey that counts, so make the most of a great South Australian road trip. These four self-drive touring routes will take you into the heart of the outback, beside stunning coastline, through world-renowned food and wine regions and along Australia’s famous Murray River. Welcome to South Australia. www.roadtrips.southaustralia.com
july/august 2015
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special feature | travel
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Seafood Frontier This is the ultimate seafood safari. Follow South Australia’s stunning coastline from the Yorke Peninsula to the state’s far west coast. Swim with sea lions and tuna, cage dive with Great White Sharks, or set out on a fishing charter. Indulge in Australia’s best seafood straight from the Southern Ocean.
make sure you...
Go crabbing in Ardrosson If you love Blue Swimmer crabs, you’re in luck. Drop a net from the jetty or rake the shallows to the north or south of the town and you should be in business. Sample fresh oysters direct from the growers in Stansbury Stansbury is a good place to find local oysters straight from the sea – keep your eye out for signs for fresh oysters. Explore Innes National Park Allow plenty of time to admire the spectacular coastal landscapes, diverse wildlife and enjoy some time outdoors. Innes is great for camping, bushwalking, fishing and surfing. Go on a Marion Bay Deep sea fishing charter Marion Bay is popular for deep-sea fishing, and during winter you can catch King George whiting, snapper, swallow tail, trevally and blue morwong. Contact one of the fishing charter operators in the region to get the catch of the day.
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Visit historical Moonta South Australia’s second largest town in its heyday, Moonta has many beautiful old buildings, churches and historical sites and the Moonta Mines Museum is well worth a visit. Get into the water and interact with wildlife Try the Swim with the Tuna experience, four miles off Port Lincoln. Or dive into the clear waters off Seal Cove and spend some time playing with Australian sea lions – the puppy dogs of the sea. For something slightly scarier, take a day tour to Neptune Islands. Here you can go cage diving and get up close to the legendary Great White shark. No diving experience necessary. Explore Nature Lincoln National Park and Coffin Bay National Park feature cliffs, sand dunes, sheltered bays and sandy beaches, both a short drive from Port Lincoln. Much of these parks can be accessed in a standard vehicle, but if you have a four-wheel drive, even better. Indulge in some factory direct seafood Feast your eyes on the range at the Fresh Fish Place – King George whiting, snapper, crayfish, prawns, succulent Coffin Bay oysters, Boston Bay mussels and much more.
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special feature | travel
Epicurean Way If you travel for your tastebuds, this culinary adventure is for you. Visit the world-famous Barossa, the picturesque Adelaide Hills, McLaren Vale and Clare Valley. Stop in at cellar doors and feast on gourmet local produce at restaurants set amongst sprawling vineyards.
you must...
Challenge yourself! If you love oysters you can’t leave Port Lincoln without taking on the one kilogram King oyster challenge at the Port Lincoln Hotel (make sure you pre-book). It’s also worth getting to Coffin Bay for a tour and tasting. Go salmon fishing at Locks Well Beach Anglers will be interested to hear that Locks Well beach delivers the most consistent catch of salmon in South Australia, and the walk down the massive staircase to the beach is an experience in itself. See nature up close Elliston is famed for its sightings of whales, sea lions and dolphins. The bay is ideal for fishing or swimming and is scattered with caves. Baird Bay Ocean Eco Experience take guests to swim with sea lions and Bottlenose dolphins – a remarkable experience. Take lots of photographs! Murphy’s Haystacks near Streaky Bay are thought to be over 1.5 million years old. The wind-worn boulders sit in the middle of a wheat field and are amongst the most photographed attractions on the Eyre Peninsula. Go Whale Watching West of Ceduna, Fowlers Bay lights up every year from July to October with the presence of Southern Right whales. Further west on South Australia’s remote west coast, Head of Bight is famous for its view from land of the magnificent Southern Right whale. Between May and October it is a nursery for mothers and calves.
Sample local produce The Willunga Farmers Market was the first in South Australia and it’s still one of the best. Stay in a Bed and Breakfast The Adelaide Hills is best known for its bed and breakfasts, cosy cottages and contemporary hotels. Eat some chocolate Hahndorf Hill Winery offers a ChocoVino experience that combines everyone’s two favourite things – wine and chocolate. Visit the Farm Shop If you’re in Hahndorf in the warmer months, picking your own strawberries at Beerenberg Farm is fun for the whole family. Taste and purchase delicious jams, preserves and sauces year-round at their onsite farm shop. Indulge in cheese tasting Visit the cellar door at Woodside Cheese Wrights to taste and purchase award-winning cheeses or book in for cheese making classes. Taste award-winning drops The Lobethal Bierhaus brews award-winning handcrafted beer. On the Taste Your Birth Year tour at Seppeltsfield Winery, taste the vintage Tawny from your birth year directly from the barrel. Learn to cook something amazing For a hands on experience try Casa Carboni Italian cooking school in Angaston. The Carboni’s run great cooking classes, demonstrations and classes for kids. Play Winemaker Play winemaker for a day on the Make Your Own Blend tour, where you enter the lab and blend your own bottle of wine to take home. Enjoy a simple lunch Stop at the Gawler South Bakery for fabulous baked and pastry goods. Stop in to see Maggie Visit Aussie food legend Maggie Beer’s Farm Shop near Nuriootpa. All of Maggie’s products are available to buy.
july/august 2015
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special feature | travel
A
Southern Ocean Drive A roadtrip along our south coast offers something for everyone. Taste wines from the Coonawarra, four-wheel drive along pristine beaches, kayak the waterways of the Coorong and discover the natural wonders of Kangaroo Island.
make time to... Admire the Blue Lake When in Mount Gambier, you must visit the Blue Lake – an extinct volcano crater filled with water, which from early November changes to an intense deep turquoise colour almost overnight. The colouring remains until late February. Explore the Piccaninnie Ponds Conservation Park Here you can snorkel across the top of The Chasm and peer down into the dark depths below. For those who don’t want to get into the water, take a walk along the beach and see the freshwater springs bubbling up onto the sand. Visit the home of Mary MacKillop Penola is home to the Mary MacKillop Penola Centre. Mary MacKillop is Australia’s first saint and you can visit the building where she taught. Taste the best beef Mayura Station is famous for its premium quality Wagyu beef. You can visit their Tasting Room for samples and private dining. Relax at Cowsley House Spend a couple of nights in this luxuriously appointed limestone cottage situated in the heart of historic Port Elliott.
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Check out some caves Tantanoola Caves Conservation Park consists of a single cavern bursting with helictites. These rare formations hang above and all around you and park staff run guided tours. The Naracoorte Caves National Park features fossilised skeletons of the giant animals that once roamed the area. Catch the tram to Granite Island The horse-drawn tram is a fun way to get to Granite Island. It’s the only tramway of its kind in Australia, and is powered by beautiful Clydesdale horses. Once you are on Granite Island, follow the boardwalk around the island. Penguin tours run at night. Go shopping at McLaren Unvaled In McLaren Vale, look for McLaren Unvaled, a gorgeous gifts and homewares store you could lose an afternoon in. Spend the day on Kangaroo Island You can easily spend a few days on the island. Visit Seal Bay Conservation Park and Nearby Raptor Domain. Ride quad bikes through the bush or hire a sandboard and surf the massive sand dunes at Little Sahara. Witness the amazing forces of nature at Admirals Arch and Remarkable Rocks in Flinders Chase National Park. Finally, visit Stokes Bay on the north coast. Walk to the east of the bay and follow the signs pointing to the beach. Follow a secret passage through boulders and be greeted by a picture perfect swimming beach.
5 DAY / 4 NIGHT SELF-DRIVE HOLIDAY FROM $300 Per Adult*, $110 Per Child** Includes ferry travel with your car and 4 nights for the price of 3 accommodation, plus a bonus discount voucher booklet! Call 13 13 01 or visit sealink.com.au/ads *Price based on two adults booking return ferry travel with own vehicle and 4 nights twin share at Emu Bay Holiday Homes. **Child 3 to 14 years sharing with two adults. Valid to 15 September 2015. Other accommodation options available. For terms and conditions visit sealink.com.au
special feature | travel
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Mighty MurrayWay
The Murray River flows more than 2500km from the Snowy Mountains to the Southern Ocean in South Australia. Follow one of the world’s longest rivers through its ever-changing landscapes from the Riverland to the Murray Mouth. Experience history and nature unique to each township whilst indulging in local food, wine and beer.
you have to... Kick back at The Wilkadene Microbrewery In an historic 100 year-old shearing shed, the stunning riverfront location is a great place to enjoy a boutique beer or cider.
Eat chocolate! Havenhand Chocolates combines top quality Riverland fruit with delicious Belgian chocolate. Watch the Chocolatier through a viewing window!
Stop and smell the flowers Ruston’s Rose Garden is the largest rose garden in Australia with a café and gift shop. Bella Lavender Estate is a fragrant experience. All their lavender gift products are locally made.
Take a night time tour Big Bend is the longest bend in the Murray River and is known for its spectacular riverside cliffs. Take a night tour to get a good look at the nocturnal wildlife and amazing scenery.
Play at Monash Adventure Park A guaranteed hit with kids. There are crazy leaning towers, a Burmese rope bridge, swings and huge slippery dip.
Go cruising Join the Proud Mary lunch cruise past small river townships, shack settlements and wildlife. The PS Marion is a restored heritage vessel from the golden years of riverboats. The boat takes short cruises.
Enjoy a family lunch at Sprouts Experience the friendly and relaxed atmosphere for lunch and take home a selection of condiments, dressings and sauces. Step back in time You will be transported back to the late 1890s when you visit The Village, historic Loxton. It’s great family fun with more than 45 sites depicting the early way of life for Riverland settlers. Have an educational experience At the Cobdogla Irrigation and Steam Museum. Check with the Visitor Information Centre to see when the pump is operating. Get active There’s a lot to do for the active traveller – make the most of canoe trails, bike trails and walking trails.
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Go wild at Monarto Zoo The largest open range zoo in Australia is the home of SA’s first ever Southern White rhinoceros and Australia’s largest giraffe herd. Canoe the Coorong Take a guided kayak tour of the Coorong, Murray Mouth and Goolwa area. A great experience that takes you into a special natural environment. Get dirty at Narnu Farm Kids love Narnu Farm where they can help feed animals and hand milk the cows. Horse riding is also available.
Local Travel Directory
special feature | travel
A luxuriously appointed, 3 bedroom, 2 storey limestone cottage situated in the heart of historic Port Elliot, sleeping up to 4 adults & 4 children.
Visit us at our Cellar Door for cheese and produce tastings and browse through our newly opened gallery featuring local artists and exclusive giftware.
Open 7 days 10am-4pm 22 Henry Street, Woodside Ph 08 8389 7877
C
admin@cowsleyhouse.com.au
www.cowsleyhouse.com.au
ome and experience the friendly and relaxed atmosphere of SPROUTS CAFÉ. Choose from a freshly prepared menu of wraps, foccacias, homemade burgers, quiches and salads, made using our own range of condiments, dressings and sauces which are only on sale at SPROUTS.
In winter we have our Soup and Curry of the Day and don't forget our Specials Board for something a bit different. Got a sweet tooth? You can't go past our homemade cakes and scones along with our sensational coffee, T2 looseleaf teas, homemade iced coffees and our delicious range of smoothies. In summer we also offer a Juice of the Day using fresh fruit and veggies. Our popular Saturday morning Brekky Menu ranges from good old eggs and bacon to our Sprouts Big Brekky and Vego Brekkys. We have homemade hash browns and hollandaise sauce and flavoursome smoked bacon from Linkes Butcher in the Barossa and free range eggs from Glenview Poultry in the Riverland. If you are having a function, we also provide catering, just give us a call to find out more. We hope to see you soon.
28 Wilson Street, Berri | Ph: (08) 8582 1228 | www.sproutscafe.com.au
TWO LOCATIONS Inspired advice for parents of tweens & teens
Breads, pies and pasties, quiches, cakes, buns, slices, hot drinks, fresh sandwiches and rolls, soup, hot spuds.
South Australian families want to know about YOUR products and services!
Open 7 days 30 Adelaide Road Gawler SA 5118 Ph 8522 2398 Mon to Fri 7am to 5.30pm Sat 8.30am to 4pm Sun 8am to 4.30pm
Advertise in Australia’s newest parenting and lifestyle magazine from just $250+GST
Open 6 days 3 Tod Street, Gawler SA 5118 Ph 8523 2877 Mon to Fri 8.30am to 5pm Sat 8.30am to 3pm
next issue Sept/Oct 2015 HOUSE & HOME
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FORMALS
advertising enquiries Lynette Kelly email lynette@averymagazine.com.au phone 0438 513 960
GORGEOUS GIFTS & HOMEWARES Stylish furniture including new and upcycled one off pieces. Proud stockist of high quality brands: ◆ Palas and Mariana jewellery ranges ◆ Knotty 100% Turkish cotton towels ◆ Be Enlightened and Circa home candles, soaps and diffusers ◆ Italian pewter and glass Duomo pen sets ◆ Pratten eel skin wallets ◆ The Original Market Basket ◆ Cartes card ranges and timbergrams /mclarenunvaled
8323 8432
122 Main Road McLaren Vale www.mclarenunvaled.com.au
july/august 2015
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mum’s the word | with Jenni Eyles
the great technology migration by jenni eyles
I
n year 12 (way back in 1988) the 'business studies' girls got their first taste of computers as they were introduced into schools. I did catering instead, so I missed out. In fact my sons were on computers before I was, and these days their high school library has no books, instead it's all digital. My eldest son was learning computers in day care at just two years of age. My youngest son learnt to read with Xbox...you can't get Crash Bandicoot to the next level if you can't read the screen. My kids are natives to technology, they were born into it. Sure they didn't wander around with an iPad or iPhone tucked under their arm, but they’ve had screens in their life since they were born. Me? I'm a migrant to technology. I grew up wired for sound with my Sony Walkman tape player, with over the ear headphones (not ear buds) and I knew the value of a good needle for my record player...I mean how else was I meant to play my Xanadu record? I was hip and with it when I took my “cassingles” along to parties and I have plenty of clunky video cassettes of my kids as little ones...with nothing to play them on. Yeah, technology moves fast! Speaking of fast have you sat and watched your kids as they type? I have, it's ridiculous! Their fingers are like tentacles that tap at a million miles an hour. And don't even get me started on texting, they do it all with thumbs at a crazy lightning speed. I guess that comes from all those years of texting in class behind the teacher’s back get it done before they get caught out! I remember mobile phones when you had to work super hard for a capital letter and press a button three times to get through to the letter or number you wanted! Remember that? So how do technology migrants (yeah, that's us parents) cope with technology natives (the offspring)? It's tough having a kid show you up and roll their eyes as you ask them for the eleven-billionth time how to copy and paste, or how to make a Dropbox folder.
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Sure they are handy to have around when you can't remember your iTunes password... because seriously who buys CD's any more...so old school! Um. Me! I still buy CDs. But really, you just have to get on that horse, join in and start using technology - because it's the future, baby! Get on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest...whatever, just get on it. The more you use social media platforms and read blogs and shop online, the more it will start to feel like everyday life... I promise. Sharing on social media may seem foreign and unnecessary, but believe me, if you filter out the nasty stuff, the web can be a wonderful place to share, learn and connect...it's like pen pals for the modern day. It's the norm for our kids (and just quietly, for me too now) and it's OK. Just like other new fandangled things, like ATMS and microwaves... it’s now the norm! My advice? Get schooled up on how to use technology, it’s only scary when you don't fully understand it. Break down that barrier and a whole other fabulous world will open up. I grew up reading books made of paper, sat in a classroom with overhead projectors and loved the smell of the ink when teachers ran off worksheets on the photocopier. My kids grew up on Nintendo, game consoles, CDs and flat screen televisions. One son is a DJ, not one who spins vinyl, but the kind that makes music on laptops and electronic decks. My architect husband learnt his craft on a drawing table with pens and pencils, but these days it's all done on computers in 3D. Me, I'm a writer and blogger who is connected to social media and screens almost every minute of every day. A far cry from the technophobe who gave our first desktop PC a wide berth 12 years ago. These days technology is in my pocket...literally. Sure there are still days, plenty in fact, when I screech at the top of my lungs for a son to come help me on the computer, but I'm getting there and so will you. Embrace it.
illustration KATE MASON www.katemason.com.au
I was born in an era where we hit play and record on our cassette decks when the radio announcer introduced our favourite tunes, vinyl records would prompt you to 'turn over' and our first remote control had a cord attached. I know right, totally weird!
Ruby Writes
Inspired advice for parents of tweens & teens
There are some things that make sense to operate 24/7 – hospitals, petrol stations, ATMs. But bullying? That’s something that doesn’t make life better when it comes with a 24/7 hashtag.
U
nfortunately, in the society we live in today, bullying can be constant. It no longer stops at the school gate like it used to. With the progression of social media it’s easy for any teen to hop onto the internet and continue to bully another kid outside of school hours. This is what we now know as cyberbulling. Obviously bullying of any kind is horrible, but I think cyberbulling is one of the worst kinds of bullying out there. I mean really? Giving the kid enough of a hard time at school, they then decide to continue to bully them, even in the safety of their own home. The victims of this behaviour probably like being home, their place to escape from the bullies at school. But instead, they are continually under attack - finding mean texts, or pictures, or posts on social media. There really is no escape from this. It is unrelenting. Sadly, I’ve heard of people who have been bullied online to such an extent they have taken their own lives. And I’m sure you’ve heard stories in the media about girls or boys who harass each other to send inappropriate pictures of themselves. I suppose most people think this picture will be private, but they often find it is made public with embarrassing and reputation-ruining consequences. I find it horrible to hear so many stories from people at school about their experiences with cyber bullying. Sadly, it’s now very common, but it’s NOT okay. I think the main reason for the explosion in cyberbullying is because we teens are so addicted to our social media! It comes everywhere with us and we feel the need to post every few hours on what we’re doing, who we’re with, what we’re wearing and where we are. I’m sure some bullies also think they’re anonymous on social media, and so never expect to get into trouble for their cruel comments. Well, wake up! No –one is anonymous on the internet these days and that little comment that they ‘anonymously’ posted might come back to bite them. So even bullies are in danger when it comes to cyberbullying – from their own actions. So, the next question is how can you guys as awesome parents help? Well, you can help us to set a time limit that we spend on social media, and you can talk to us about the dangers of becoming addicted to technology, and of posting our life story online. Because even though we might not talk to you about it, we still need you to talk to us about it.
There really is no escape from this. It is unrelenting.
next issue Sept/Oct 2015 HOUSE & HOME
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FORMALS
Tween Bedroom Style Step inside style guru Claire’s own children’s rooms. Organisation 101 Sarah offers her top tips for decluttering and organising. Parents Retreat Furniture and homewares just for the grown ups. Formal fashion for teens Our stylish and appropriate picks for their big night. Teen makeup From daytime to formal in minutes.
South Australian families want to know about YOUR products and services! Advertise in Australia’s newest parenting and lifestyle magazine from just $250 + GST advertising enquiries Lynette Kelly email lynette@averymagazine.com.au phone 0438 513 960 july/august 2015
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avery | top 20
BACK IN MY DAY... Do teenagers REALLY have it tougher these days? Let’s take a minute to think about all those things we grown-ups had to endure as teenagers, that this new breed of youngsters will never understand.
"Waiting weeks for a letter from your overseas pen pal." Andrew, 45
Not being able to skip or shuffle your music as we only had cassettes with pre-defined orders. Alison, 34.
"Having to find a payphone to call home when you were going to be late." Anna, 39
"Looking up your crush’s phone number in the White Pages." JESS, 31 "Rewinding my cassette tapes with a pencil." Annie, 44
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"Handwriting all your assignments and essays." Robert, 37
"Having to tear the little perforated strips of dots off the edges of your printer paper."
Kate, 39
"Waiting a week for photos to be developed and hoping they turned out. Wouldn't have dreamed of wasting film on photos of my food!" KELLY, 34.
"Actually talking to your date, rather than just tweeting about it." MARK, 45 Waiting a month to read the next Dolly Doctor to find out “important things.” KRISTY, 34
Mastering the art of flipping a record and gently walking away so you don’t stuff up that awesome intro. Michael, 47 "Passing handwritten notes to your friends in class, and praying the teacher didn’t intercept them." Jeremy, 44.
Using encyclopaedias to research assignments – where was Google when we needed it? Sarah, 37 "Using a key to open a car door, and winding the windows up and down manually." Michael, 46.
Sitting with your fingers hovering over the record and play buttons of your cassette recorder, waiting for your favourite song to come on the radio so you can tape it, only to be devastated when the bloody DJ talks over the intro! Craig, 48
"Unplugging the home phone to plug in the old school modem and waiting for the dial up internet." Kylie, 41 "Getting your part time job pay in cash in a little envelope and then having to go into a bank to deposit it into your account." Tricia 43
Trying to quietly dial your friend on the only phone (with the 8 foot cord) after "phone hours" were over.
BOBBIE, 47
"Trying to limit yourself to just a few tapes for your cassette walkman while you were travelling." Kane, 42
"Making firm arrangements with people well in advance for meetings in public places, because there was no way to contact each other." Evie, 49
OLSH Every opportunity for success COLLEGE TOURS Wednesday 5 August, 9:30am Subject selection focus
Wednesday 16 September, 5:30pm Following the tour, you’re invited to attend our Performing Arts Showcase at 7pm
Monday 2 November, 9:30am and 5:30pm Visual Arts focus To register for a tour, please contact Sandy Bethley. Individual tour times also available.
ACADEMIC SUCCESS Our rigorous curriculum, dedicated teachers, wide range of subjects and individual careers counselling, give your daughter every opportunity for success at school and beyond.
TRULY ALL GIRLS In a girls’ school, girls learn and lead in an atmosphere of approval, everything we do is designed to ensure each girl reaches their full potential.
O U R L A DY O F T H E S AC R E D H E A R T C O L L E G E Catholic Secondary School for Girls Years 8 to 12
496 Regency Road Enfield South Australia 5085 Phone 8269 8800 www.olsh.catholic.edu.au
Show them something
worth instagramming. Take the family on a classic South Australian road trip and you’ll capture so much more than just selfies and food shots. You’ll get to experience a much bigger picture that simply can’t be measured in megapixels. Share the magic and memories of a journey that will take you to some of South Australia’s most wondrous locations from the Outback to the Murray, across our stunning coastlines and beyond. There are five self-drive itineraries to discover and they’re ready to be explored when you visit us online.
roadtrips.southaustralia.com