Feeling sexy is about how you feel . If you let how you look dictate your sexuality, you’re going to be frustrated. We’re all getting older and changing. stimulation as defective or self-indulgent.
partner. “My husband and I have been togeth-
She’s been able to communicate her needs to
er 26 years. I was so worried that I wouldn’t
Sharon has a new perspective on her own
her new partner and they are enjoying explor-
enjoy sex after my hysterectomy, but sex has
sexuality and what she considers “sexy.” “I
ing ways to bring her to orgasm.
been great! My husband finds me very attrac-
know women who are completely flat-chested
tive, even if I’m feeling bloated or ugly.”
(post double mastectomy) and women who’ve
Hysterectomy
over again.”
Lisa admits that she and her husband
had breast reconstruction. I am sure they had
A hysterectomy, the surgical removal of a
share a very special bond. They enjoy spend-
to contend with their own body issues, yet
woman’s reproductive organs, can create in-
ing time together; holding hands, snuggling,
they’re all extremely sexy. Feeling sexy is
tense feelings of loss or liberation.
etc. ... But she is convinced that their ability
about how you feel. If you let how you look dic-
“When I had my hysterectomy at 47, I im-
to keep things “fresh” keeps their relation-
tate your sexuality, you’re going to be frustrat-
mediately entered a period of mourning for my
ship fresh. “Couples have to make things in-
ed. We’re all getting older and changing.”
parts,” says Liz. Liz’s hysterectomy and subse-
teresting,” she says.
quent menopause ushered in mood swings,
Life and Death Situations
At just 44-years-old and after 20 years of marriage, Claire suddenly found herself alone
hot flashes and gradually diminishing sex
Sharon had lived her adult life with sexu-
drive. For the first three years, she experienced
al harassment because of her large breasts.
– without her husband, her lover, her best
relief with hormone replacement patches. But
She had a breast reduction in her early 40s
“I was so depressed after my husband
when her mood swings increased, she
following a stint on oral contraceptives for
died,” Claire recalls. “I felt my life was over
switched to over-the-counter Estroven. Her hot
problem periods. (Her breasts tripled in size
and seriously considered suicide. A part of
flashes and mood swings have subsided, but
from D to DDD.) Nine months later, she felt a
me died inside.”
she says, “My sex drive is essentially nil. Now I
lump in her breast and a mammogram con-
Claire began to “awaken” some nine
only have sex to satisfy my husband and to
firmed breast cancer. She had a lumpectomy
months after her husband’s death. During her
preserve my marriage.” Liz has yet to find a
with axillary (armpit) lymph node removal
first date with a man, he hugged her and she
solution for her lack of desire.
followed by chemotherapy.
realized how empty she was inside. Claire re-
friend, business partner and cheerleader.
Lisa had a hysterectomy five years ago and
“Having breast cancer was life-chang-
alized that she wanted attention – yet wasn’t
feels that the experience liberated her. “I was
ing,” says Sharon. “I had no hair, my breasts
yet ready for a relationship. She didn’t date for
having heavy bleeding and bladder control is-
were scarred from the reductions and the
a long time after that, but slowly crept out of
sues, so the surgery ‘righted’ many things.” No
lumpectomy and my skin was gray from the
her darkness.
longer having to worry freed her to enjoy inter-
chemo. Yet my husband still wanted me. His
“I realized that there were many things
course more fully with her husband and life
love and dedication made me fall in love all
that I wanted and wanted to do that I hadn’t
COULD YOUR HUSBAND BE SUFFERING FROM LOW TESTOSTERONE? Have you noticed his: - Lack of energy - Being sad and/or grumpy - Decreased sex drive - Falling asleep after dinner - Decreased strength and/or endurance After 40, men’s hormones decline significantly too. Hormone replacement could be the solution!
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