ARIES (March 21-April 19)

Now Supporting

Breast Cancer Awareness and Breakfast at Tiffany’s

To raise money for the New Zealand Breast Cancer Foundation, beauty brand Dove will be holding a nationwide movie night on October 26. Get dolled up and catch one of the simultaneous screenings of Breakfast at Tiffany’s at an Events Cinemas (you can even justify each glass of champagne by saying it’s for a good cause). Tickets are $20 each but the full ticket price is donated to the cause and the whole experience includes a night of spot prizes, fabulous theatre and pinkness. Go on, get your Holly Golightly on.

Now Eye-Rolling

At the early Christmas hype

Now that we know that (spoiler alert) Santa isn’t real, the whole lead up to December 25 can be just as stressful as it is fun. I’ve already seen boxes of Christmas chocolates and stocking fillers pop up in shopping malls. It’s not even bloody mid-October yet – we’ve still got Halloween coming up! And to make it even more annoying, Justin Bieber has just debuted his first Christmas single Mistletoe. Shouldn’t he be busy writing to Santa asking for facial hair?

Now Obsessed

Martha’s Backyard

Just in case you needed another excuse to stock up on completely unhealthy food just as your stress levels are mounting, we want to introduce you to the sheer brilliance that is Martha’s Backyard – a store in Mt Wellington selling all things Americana. Think Twinkies, Pop Tarts, Tootsie Rolls, Red Vines and Cap’N Crunch. You’ll feel like you’ve just stepped into the cheesiest American sitcom you could think of and will be expecting Uncle Jessie to come running around the corner at any moment.

Now Eating At Satya

Just because we students are light in the cash department, that doesn’t mean we need to settle for crap food when we eat out. Luckily, Satya is the best of both worlds; great food for cheap. I stumbled across the South Indian restaurant on Great North Road last Friday and after scoring the last table (it was still packed at 9.30pm!) I found myself faced with a double-sided menu chocked with dishes, most of which were under $20. So many delicious alternatives to butter chicken. There are four branches of the restaurants in Auckland – the Ponsonby one was named in Metro’s Top 50 restaurants this year – and to make things even better, it’s a BYO. Grab a group of friends and a bottle of wine and experience this awesome dining experience. Just don’t forget to book! If you think you’re on the pulse with what’s happening in Auckland, email debate@aut.ac.nz with your own Suggestions.

You are being insulted a lot this week but don’t take it so personally, it’s all in jest. Harden up, you ugly bastard.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Someone nearby you will start talking about that bee sting scene in My Girl where Macaulay Culkin dies. All of a sudden you will get something in your eye/your allergies will play up.

GEMINI (May 21-June 21)

It seems even robots would have more luck than you when it comes to falling in love. Silver lining though, it is possible a robot may fall in love with you. Eh, take what you can get.

CANCER (June 22-July 22)

You’re going to get more attention than you bargained for when Target does an expose this week on ‘sleazy hidden hotels where cheating lovers meet’.

LEO (July 23-August 22)

You consider yourself a born leader. Everyone else just thinks you’re an idiot.

VIRGO (August 23-September 22)

Parents/older relatives will try to meddle in your life this week. Let them – remember, they’re old and they have you in the wills.

LIBRA (September 23-October 23)

You will make friends with an escaped prisoner on Wednesday afternoon. It will make you feel pretty badass until you realise your wallet’s missing.

SCORPIO (October 24-November 21)

Be confident about every decision you make this week. They’ll be the wrong ones, of course, but you might as well show a little enthusiasm.

SAGITTARIUS (November22-Dec21)

You have big feet which means that you also have large…shoes.

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 19)

You have an overactive imagination and often think you’re being followed. This week, you actually are. Don’t look, just run like a madman and scream profanities at the top of your voice.

AQUARIUS (January 20-Febuary 18)

Take care when exiting bathrooms this week – the stars see a toilet paper stuck to shoe/skirt tucked in undies fiasco in your future.

PISCES (Febuary 19-March 20)

Don’t swear around your mum this week. That whole ‘I’ll wash your mouth out with soap’ yarn was not an empty threat.

26.

issue 25 2011