AUT students are now required to pay all course fees in staplers as well as deposit staples into photocopiers. Many students have welcomed the move, fully embracing the new system. AUT Business student Mary Farnsworth stated that “staplers are actually cheaper than money these days and to go from paying $6000 to 8 staplers a year is great”. Facebook page ‘Students for Staplers’ is also appreciate of the move, saying that “now more people have staplers, hopefully they’ll be used for joining assignments together”.
AUT Changes Currency System to Staplers by Kieran Bennett Auckland University of Technology University announced recently that they would be switching the universities internal and external currency to one based around the exchange of staplers. The announcement came in response to student outcry against having the stapler next to the assignment hand in box removed. Demand for an explanation was high and so AUT Vice Chancellor Derek McCormack spoke to a record audience of four students last week. Stating the initial reason for its removal was due to budget cuts "because really we're providing twice the University", Mr McCormack was apologetic. Controversy rocked the room however when he revealed AUT’s new currency arrangements, citing that staple shares worldwide were on the rise.
Economics Professor Alan ‘dollah bills’ Farrel told the press that such a move was only to be expected as staplers “are basically the gold of the 21st century”. He then went on to say the ability to press several sheets of paper together with a bent piece of metal was not to be underestimated and that strict governmental control was to be expected. However when confronted Prime Minister John Key laughed and said that when he grew up he had paper clips “and really it doesn’t get any more kiwi than that”. AUT University has already begun to horde the valuable paper joiners, ousting already existing post-graduate students from the tenth floor to construct a stapler vault. Professor Farrel estimated that AUT was already in possession of at least 500 staplers and that if their growth continued AUT may well become the leading share owner in staplers. Students have been welcoming of the new growth, with many students hoping that a new stapler would be provided in the WG building from the surplus. When questioned, many AUT staff passed out from laughing so hard.
Haters Hate on AUT’s School of Law AUT School of Law director of undergraduate programmes Professor Mike French is undeterred by Grant’s criticism. “The article in the Herald on Sunday was unfortunate and irritating but from time to time the AUT Law School - and indeed AUT generally - has had to put up with this type of uninformed press comment.”
by Cameron Carpenter AUT’s law degree has been deemed useless by a Herald on Sunday correspondent - however he is being proven wrong by students and professors. In his column Damien Grant strikes at the number of law graduates saying there are not enough jobs to go around, and makes a point to knock AUT’s School of Law; “even AUT offers law, despite its graduates not getting shortlisted at most firms. An LLB from AUT is as useful as a chocolate hammer. Those students who failed to get into Auckland University can enrol at AUT. Few of them will ever appear before a judge, but that is not why they are there.”
He says time is proving the naysayers wrong with the first round of AUT Law students graduating in August and many already securing jobs at big law firms and government organisations.
“It’s a reflection of the fact that employers generally value the skills which law graduates have in critical analysis, problem solving and oral and written communication.” On Facebook; AUT Law Students’ Society media officer Chris Caskey says AUT’s degree is a better product - what it lacks in reputation because of its age. “The AUT LLB is an end result of someone re-engineering the LLB to be tailored to useful, market ready skills,” he says.
“It is a clear sign that the vast majority of the legal profession here in Auckland at least does not share the views expressed by people who wouldn't know a chocolate hammer if they were sucking on one.” French says in New Zealand, Australia and The UK less than 50% of law graduates end up working in legal practice - but still have one of the highest employability rates amongst all graduates.
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