Barbara Matson of hodge:podge As my oldest daughter graduates to head off on her own, with another right behind her, I find myself reflecting back on what my husband and I have done to raise such strong, smart and confident girls that we are incredibly proud of. There is no right or wrong answer in raising girls. Parenting books helped somewhat but the advice was often conflicting. Instead I followed my gut while listening and observing others whose parenting I admired. I made sure my girls had strong female role models and relied on my own past experiences to guide us in raising our two beautiful girls. With all the negative influences society can place upon women, I determined to raise confident daughters. With pressure to look and act a certain way, I did not want them to feel inadequate if they didn’t fit a certain ideal. We tried to find a balance by ensuring they always looked presentable, providing nice clothes and good haircuts along with reminders of how beautiful they were - even when waking up with bed head in crumpled pj’s! But our focus was that beauty came from within, that their worth was not based on looks but who they were. Involving them in sports from a young age has been a great way to give them the confidence they would need, which rings true now that they are teenagers. Participating in sports has brought successes and failures that have given them strength both physically and mentally. I made a conscience effort to encourage them to take risks, to push themselves physically, morally and intellectually, to not give up when things didn’t go as hoped for. These experiences provided opportunities to learn the lessons which make a person stronger.
There is nothing more satisfying than watching your daughters grow up confident in their capabilities, to be proud of who they are. They are intelligent, beautiful and strong girls. As they forge ahead into an uncertain world, I hope that they will take that confidence with them along a path that brings them success and happiness. My oldest says, “I appreciate how my mom modeled respectful behavior towards herself, how she demonstrated eating well, staying healthy, exercising and not obsessing over her looks.” My sixteen year old adds, “I love how she encouraged and stressed the importance of trying various activities such as music, arts, academics and sports, no matter if we were good at them or not. We took the chance to try, which helped us find what we were good at.”
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