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IMPORTANT QUESTIONS TO ASK MEN
If you’re unsure about a man in your life, here are some questions that will give you a clear look into the mental world of your man (warning: answers may be potentially situation-ship ruining, but consider it a dodged bullet). 1. How many pillows do you have on your bed? And what is the state of these pillows? (full, moderate, a piece of fucking drywall?) 2. When was the last time you changed your bed sheets? 3. Do you have a bed frame? If so, is it intact? 4. Vaccination status? 5. What do you think about The Wolf of Wall Street? 6. How many hours do you spend on Reddit a week? 7. Would you be open to seeing a therapist? 8. What kind of ‘bro’ are you? (gym bro, crypto bro, lifehack bro) 9. Follow up: Fuck, marry, kill: gym bro, crypto bro, lifehack bro 10. Are you a feminist? 11. Are you an ally? 12. What is your relationship with your mother? 13. Do you have female role models and why not? 14. Thoughts on men and women being ‘just friends’? 15. How do you tie your shoes? (Important) 16. How important are KFC zinger boxes to your diet? 17. How important are energy drinks to your diet? 18. Do you ‘rise and grind’? 19. How important are ‘gains’ to you? 20. League of Legends, yes or no? 21. The Witcher, yes or no? 22. Thoughts on Elon Musk? 23. Does Joe Rogan give you sexual feelings? 24. Follow up: Were you disgusted or aroused by question 23?
25. Have you ever, or would you ever, read Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov? 26. Have you ever, or would you ever, read 12 Rules for Life by Jordan B. Peterson? 27. Thoughts on calling your boyfriend ‘daddy’? (Important) 28. Would you be opposed to binge watching the entirety of the Barbie movie franchise? 29. Would you be opposed to binge watching the Twilight Saga franchise? 30. Who is your favourite Disney princess? 31. Do you use a purse or a man’s purse? 32. How frequently do you bathe or shower? 33. Do you use a loofah or a man’s loofah? 34. Do you use 3-in-1 bodywash/ conditioner/shampoo and who gave you that idea? 35. Do you have multiple computer monitors and/or a light-up keyboard? 36. Do you have a gamer chair? 37. Do you own and carry tools and equipment? 38. Do you have an ongoing woodworking project and why? 39. Have you ever fantasised about riding a motorcycle? 40. Would you be open to wearing a skirt and high heels? 41. What is your skin care routine? 42. Do you wear make up? If you don’t, would you be open to wearing make up? 43. Have you ever, or would you ever, get one sleeve of tattoos in one go? 44. How many tiktoks have you made and are you shirtless (thirst-trapping) in any of them? 45. Have you ever ordered a scotch on the rocks but secretly wanted a sex on the beach or a cosmopolitan?
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