"My Internship Story" by ACT for Youth

YOUTH IN RESEARCH MY INTERNSHIP STORY An Evaluation of the Assets Coming Together For Youth Research Internship Program Enzo Verrilli, PhDc York University

Assets Coming Together f for youth to be involved. P

MY INTERNSHIP STORY INVOLVING YOUTH IN RESEARCH..................................2 The Research Internship Model “We will build the capacity of youth to take leadership roles in addressing important issues in their communities and lives.”

SILVIA’S STORY.............................................................4 Finding My Inner Side “The people I work with I love; even though they live in the same area, everybody has a history, their own problems...”

JENNIFER’S STORY........................................................7 Rounding Off “When you are in high school, you think ‘Oh God, people in university are so different’…like a different species.”

ELIZA’S STORY.............................................................10 Weaving a Story of Trials “I am able to rise above all that had been said about me... instead of letting those words suppress me and pull me down further.”

SUE’S STORY...............................................................13 Research Inside Out “Pick and choose your battles…not everything is a fight... sometimes it’s just a learning experience.”

NOTES.........................................................................17

MY INTERNSHIP STORY

INVOLVING YOUTH IN RESEARCH The Research Internship Model

The Assets Coming Together (ACT) project is a five-year community-university research partnership that is focused on developing a comprehensive youth strategy that will outline how urban communities like the Jane-Finch community can build assets for youth. ACT is committed to building the research capacity of Jane-Finch youth and in project’s funding proposal, the project committed to: “extensively recruit, hire and train youth as peer interviewers and involve them in knowledge mobilization and communication activities. We will build the capacity of youth to take leadership roles in addressing important issues in their communities and lives”. One of the ways that ACT has tried to fulfill this commitment to Jane-Finch youth is through the creation of a 200-hour Research Internship program that provides paid research experience to youth who live in the Jane-Finch community. The internship provides an opportunity for youth to gain experience in community-based research. The internship includes research workshops on a variety of research topics including the theory and practice of community-based research; program evaluation; research ethics; qualitative research methods and quantitative research methods.

To understand the internship experience for the first cohort of youth, interviews were conducted with four youth interns using the ‘ Most Significant Change’ methodology. The interns shared what they considered to be the “most significant change” related to their youth internship experience. The emerging findings were given to the interviewee for feedback. What follows are four short stories relating the personal experiences of these interns. An analysis of the interns’ most significant change stories reveal three recurring interrelated themes that can be conceptualized as assets which the youth internship helped the youth to develop. The themes are: an increase in self-efficacy and self-awareness; a broadened social network and understanding of their community; and improvement in academic-related skill set including the general research process. Moving forward, the ACT project needs to review ways that the project can deliberately build in experiences that are related to these themes.

The themes are: an increase in self-efficacy and self-awareness; a broadened social network and understanding of their community; and improvement in academic-related skill set including the general research process.

MY INTERNSHIP STORY

SILVIA’S STORY

Finding my Inner Side Silvia was in grade 12 when the internship started. She was raised in the Jane/Finch community, attending elementary and high school locally, as well as volunteering with several community agencies. Silvia’s youth intern experience was marked by ups and downs. Her initial excitement, which was shared emphatically by her family about being selected for the position faded and turned to frustration during the first half of the internship. Despite wanting to apply herself and make the most of the opportunity, she was confused about the purpose of the research and her particular role. Lacking prior research experience, she felt lost and overwhelmed during the research workshops, and felt she simply couldn’t relate to the assigned readings. Things turned for the better when it was time to recruit participants for the Mobile Speakers’ Corner and coordinate focus groups. She’s always enjoyed public speaking and social interaction, and was disappointed when the recruitment and focus groups finished because she felt she had just started excelling and wanted to do more of it. Silvia also spoke of her participation in Speaker’s Corner and interaction with other youth interns as an “eye-opener”. Hearing people’s stories from the community and getting to know her youth intern peers, she was struck by how many problems and personal situations people are going through of which she was unaware. She says, “the people I work with I love; even though they live in the same area, everybody has a history, their own problems—a lot of them you would never imagine they are going through, right?”. Overall, she felt she had matured and “made contacts” by getting to know people from her community and youth intern peers beyond a superficial level.

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Reflecting on her internship experience in retrospect, she defined the most significant change as self-discovery, a change in her inner self, which led to a reshuffling of her priorities and plans for the future. Her initial motivation and attitude towards the internship was that she would “just do it because it’s a job”, but she soon realized that she should do it because “it’s cool”; that she’d gain more than just a pay cheque.” She understood that experience in a social work setting would “totally open up doors” for her. She’d learn how research is conducted, and how social workers orient themselves to the concerns of a community.

“I guess before, I was stuck…I didn’t really think I can do it, right? I didn’t really have high expectations of myself...after a while, after talking to some people, I kind of believe in myself now, because I know that if I put all my might into something, I will do it.” Silvia also spoke insightfully about how she had previously set limitations on herself, boxing herself in, but now feels that she’s slowly breaking through that box. She says, “I guess before, I was stuck…I didn’t really think I can do it, right? I didn’t really have high expectations of myself…but after a while, after talking to some people, I kind of believe in myself now, because I know that if I put all my might into something, I will do it.” She feels that just getting the position, and being around older people such as graduate students and professors gave her the push she needed, and changed her “mentality”. Previously, she would gloss over reading material, but now she approaches reading with a different attitude—she says to herself, “maybe I can get something out of it”.

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being a child of a single mother in a low income household contributed a lot to it. She learned at a young age that her mother wouldn’t be able to provide for her all that she wanted outside of the basic necessities. Therefore, if she wanted to buy something, she either had to wait to buy it or earn money for herself. Her decision was to start working at a young age so that she could buy things that she wanted, and in so doing, ease the financial burden on her mother. At the time of the interview, Silvia had just finished her last year of high school and was ready to start college. However, she said she had recently decided to go back to high school for one more year to upgrade her courses and attend university. She attributed this change in plans to her experience in the internship. She now spends less time hanging out with friends, and wishes that the internship was a full-time job. She says, “You can hang around any time. I’d rather be working making not only money, but making something with myself, you know, something with myself for my future.”

JENNIFER’S STORY Rounding Off

Jennifer was in grade 12 when she started the internship, squarely focussed on her upcoming transition to university in September. She had been living in the Jane and Finch community for about three years while attending high school in the area, but a large part of her social circle was situated outside of the Jane and Finch area. Despite her very busy extracurricular schedule that included volunteering at the local library and many after-school clubs where she participated on the fundraising and planning committees, she had been told by friends and even her mother that she was “book smart, but lacked in life skills”. She learned of the youth internship opportunity through the Youth at Yorkwoods Program, and was attracted to the potential of earning $2,500 while acquiring research skills. Although she thought the idea of the internship was “very cool”, she almost didn’t apply because she thought it would be a very competitive application process and feared not being chosen. She says, “I was really, really, really afraid..I had high expectations…I just thought that York University is a step-up, or 5-6 steps up from where I was at…research intern at York sounds so different compared to New York Fries or CNE, right?” She also was anxious that she lacked experience compared to others living in Jane and Finch because her mother doesn’t allow her to hang out much. After a few months of the internship experience, Jennifer valued meeting a lot of interesting people and learning “that people in university are not that different from people in high school, just more mature… When you are in high school, you think ‘Oh

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God, people in university are so different’…like a different species.” She feels her internship experience has made her “open her eyes” and makes her feel ready to go to university. Before the internship, she never thought that she’d be engaging in casual conversation with university graduates, professors and administrators. She also mentions broadening her realm of possibilities by hearing the stories of older graduate research assistants. She says of their stories, “Their experiences are so interesting…it makes me feel like possibilities are kind of endless. I wanna try new things like travel the world, take a year off...it just seems so cool.” When asked the reason why she wasn’t aware of those possibilities, Jennifer responds, “I don’t know anyone older than me. “ What she means is that the only older people she knows are parents or relatives. She’s the eldest of the siblings in her family, and the first in her family to go to university. Consequently, she’s never had the chance to speak openly with people about the nonacademic aspects of the university experience. About teachers, she says, “it’s weird talking to them (on a personal level)…I will just talk to them about (getting accepted into) university.” Jennifer’s social and professional network expanded beyond the people she met at university. When asked what aspect of the internship she liked most, she responded, “the regular work days… days with no meetings, when I can come in, complete a task and I get to interact with people.” She felt a sense of accomplishment when she completed a task, and she learned a lot from casual interaction with the interns, research assistants and PhD students. Related to expanding her social network, she says she met a lot of people through the Photo Voice Project, and at Westview who she wouldn’t have met “in real life”. She felt empowered because she was part of a diverse York University Research group.

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Before the internship, Jennifer never thought that she’d be engaging in casual conversation with university graduates, professors and administrators. She also mentions broadening her realm of possibilities by hearing the stories of older graduate research assistants. She says of their stories, “Their experiences are so interesting…it makes me feel like the possibilities are kind of endless. I wanna try new things like travel the world, take a year off...it just seems so cool.” She was able to have conversation beyond ‘hi and bye’ with youth she previously considered “gangsters”. Speaking of “gangsters”, she says, “they are very chill compare to me…so I don’t know what to talk to them about…with my friends, I’m usually talking about school, but they are just so relaxed..and don’t worry about consequences.” Jennifer seemed to have gained insight by the comparison she drew between herself and the “gangsters”, and also felt more prepared to make friendships when she would head off to university in September. She finds it difficult to pinpoint the changes in herself in a short period of time (4 to 5 months) and almost feels guilty about admitting that what was most valuable about the internship were the social aspects. Yet, Jennifer realizes that she heads towards university in September a bit more mature, with better “life skills, and overall a more balanced, well-rounded person.

MY INTERNSHIP STORY

ELIZA’S STORY

Weaving a Story of Trials Eliza has grown up in the Jane Finch community, but partially due to being a victim of bullying in her younger years, decided to attend highschool outside of the Jane-Finch neighbourhood. She is youngest of the first cohort of youth interns and learned about the youth internship opportunity on the day of her 16th birthday. She jokingly asked for a job to the person who ran the community agency where she volunteered and was surprised when this person, who she looks up to like an older sister actually handed her an application from the ACT project to fill out. Eliza spent her entire January working on that application, urged on by her mother’s nagging, “..did you finish that application, this is a big moment, if you get this, then, then …” and managed to submit it just before the deadline. She was discouraged after not hearing back for two weeks, but when she got the call to book an interview for the internship on a random Sunday evening, Eliza’s skepticism turned to happiness—or as she described it, hysteria. Unfortunately, Eliza’s hysteria was also accompanied by feelings of inferiority, unworthiness, and a paranoid feeling that this opportunity was just a big joke being played on her. These doubts would plague her and at one point early in the internship, she had to take time off from both school and the internship to be able to continue. When asked whether she has changed over the course of the internship, she says “ I can’t see an area in my life that hasn’t changed.” She begins by saying that “being around academics has done wondrous things for my cognitive skills.” Eliza is now better able to dissect arguments, analyze, and penetrate deeper into issues. She continues, “an argument is open for dissection; you can figure out the root of the argument, why’s the argument happening, and why there is a conflict between me and so-andso.” Gaining an awareness of these skills has given her a sense of

MY INTERNSHIP STORY

“Being around academics has done wondrous things for my cognitive skills.” Eliza is now better able to dissect arguments, analyze, and penetrate deeper into issues. She continues, “An argument is open for dissection; you can figure out the root of the argument, why’s the argument happening, and why there is a conflict between me and so-and-so.” self…and “some sort of power”. Moreover, she links her empowerment to being able to work at York University: “being able to work alongside an institution as big as this would give anyone a sense of empowerment…especially knowing where I live, you don’t often get opportunities like this.” Given her upbringing in a poor neighbourhood where she was bullied by youth she termed “hoodlums” and suffering through paranoia and feelings of inferiority, this internship served as redemption for Eliza: “the fact that I am able to rise above all that had been said about me, and be able to actually do something more fit with my life, instead of letting those words suppress me and pull me down further.” She speaks of the physical office space used for the project as a “paradise or an oasis—a temporary reprieve where I get away from the stresses or things that afflict you.” Despite Eliza’s feeling of positive change related to the internship, as well as her earlier declaration of everything about her having changed, she also sometimes feels things have not changed for the better. She feels that she failed at recruitment, and had moments of realization that her mental health issues will always be a problem with which she’ll have to learn to live. Other times she mentions how progress has been of the “1 step

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forward, 2 steps back” variety. But from an observer’s perspective, Eliza’s seems to have increased self-awareness, and discovered a resiliency she didn’t know she had. She says, “I find that despite all that’s happened, despite how unfortunate that time was (when she had to take a leave of absence from the internship and school)…I find the end of that to be positive, because, instead of shaking in fear about what people can think about me, I decided to come back to work, and that was….a really, really amazing time for me”.

SUE’S STORY

Research Inside Out Sue grew up in Jane and Finch but spent some time attending highschool in Markham. She’s well-informed and critical of past research that has taken place in the Jane Finch area. She became aware of the opportunity to be a youth intern with the Assets Coming Together project through the TD Engagement Centre. The project promised to be more comprehensive than past research--not just a “quick thing” and committed to include Jane Finch youth as research interns. As a result, she was very excited, especially about the potential long term (5 years) engagement with strong financial backing. At the time of the interview Sue was in her early 20s and in a transiton period, coming off a break from school, and figuring out her career plan. Sue’s level of awareness of the internship experiences and her ability to synthesize them succinctly were striking. The first positive aspect she noted about the internship was the opportunity for networking--“just meeting Uzo, coming to the social work building, discovering new spaces and exposure to York University”. If you’re not exposed to an environment, she says, it seems so far away, but “if you are exposed, if you are in that environment, then you can see that it’s attainable and you can start making steps towards it.” She expands, “working with research assistants…kinda closer to my age made me reflect and see where I want to be because it’s kinda like a stone’s throw away.” She felt more motivated to pursue post secondary education due to her interaction with the research assistants, and part of her reflection included a candid admission that her previous choice to attend medical administration at college was “a copout” (a skill set to fall back on), for fear of not being well equipped to handle university, and not having good enough marks.

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Elaborating on the environmental aspects of the internship, Sue mentioned how this internship was less structured and more self-directed than what one experiences in highschool or college. She says, “it depends what you wanna soak up… you can create your own learning opportunities,…you can take initiatives and think of new ideas, think of different questions, different ways to phrase them, just analyze your own work. ..in school, they already provide structure for you, so you just have to sit, kind of just…”. At this point in the interview, the ice had clearly been broken, so the main question of the interview was posed to her: “what was the most significant change you’ve experienced in yourself as a result of this internship?” Answer: “Pick and choose your battles…not everything is a fight..sometimes it’s just a learning experience.” Previously, Sue always felt the need to speak up, to resist, to say something in order to make the other person see things from her perspective. But while notetaking at research interviews with youth in the community regarding their employment situation she had what she described as a sort of awakening. She realized that one doesn’t have to always say what one is thinking. Conducting an interview, she says, teaches you to be quiet, in other words, to listen—“you might be thinking of your own opinion, but you can’t indoctrinate the (other) person with them.” When asked if that skill is transferable to other areas of life, she emphatically affirmed, “it teaches you to be diplomatic.” She says, “sometimes you just have to be an observer and just a learner… because people who are in a higher position don’t wanna feel like you’re trying to fight them all the time.”

MY INTERNSHIP STORY

“Pick and choose your battles…not everything is a fight..sometimes it’s just a learning experience.” Previously, Sue always felt the need to speak up, to resist, to say something in order to make the other person see things from her perspective. She realized that one doesn’t have to always say what one is thinking.” Later in the interview, Sue exercised her newly-honed critical skills giving valuable feedback on aspects of the project that could be improved. Her main criticism focussed on the rationale and purpose of the project not being advertised enough. Despite being involved with the internship for several months, she still didn’t feel well versed enough to explain to the community what has been learned from past research done in the Jane-Finch area, and how the present research builds on prior work. That’s not to say that she hasn’t learned a lot. In years past, as a participant in research studies, she often felt as she was signing over her life when signing a consent form. Now, she better understands the process, gaining an “insider’s perspective” on research. One with a talent for coining phrases, she said that she didn’t realize how “administrativy” research was going to be—recruitment, screening, consent, demographics, booking appointments—it’s a big process! She still says she has a distrust for big institutions, but she now says it laughingly and not with bitter animosity.

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Citation: Verrillo, E. (2011) “My Internship Story” An Evaluation of the Assets Coming Together For Youth Research Internship Program. The Assets Coming Together For Youth Project. Copyright © 2011 The Assets Coming Together For Youth Project York University 4700 Keele Street, Toronto, Ontario M3J 1P3 actyouth@yorku.ca www.yorku.ca/act