ABSOLUTE CELEBRITY
O-BITCH-UARY…
With Austin Mutti-Mewse
!” ne go m I’ n he w e m t ou ab lk ta “Don’t The only A-list celebrity column in Sussex Would Liza have given an X or 0 factor? The X Factor curse continues... Robbie Williams was bug-eyed and nervously sweaty during his recent performance, Whitney Houston lost her dress and struggled to speak - staring at the floor and looking very spaced out, and Cheryl Cole almost hyper-ventilated over her own performance, only to be derided by the press for her poor vocals and a ridiculous outfit that made her look like a toy soldier from the Brothers Grimm. So needless to say, producers were afraid Westlife might wobble. However, the Irish lads didn’t disappoint them. And then there was Bon Jovi... the ageless rockers rocked so well! However, a mole on the show revealed to me that Liza Minnelli had been seriously considered to appear on that show. The notoriously demanding diva who sung ‘Losing My Mind’ with The Pet Shop Boys twenty years ago, would surely have been a sequin too far and may have derailed the show altogether... but lets face it, the show would have been fun to watch!
HM enjoys a cuddly Christmas What does one buy the Queen for Christmas? Well, her former Royal Couturier Sir Hardy Amies struck on the novel idea of cuddly toys. Sent annually, the Queen was most impressed by his ingenuous choice of gift: “Dear Mr. Amies, Many thanks for the cuddly kangaroo you sent this year,” she wrote in a handwritten letter to Amies in 1965, “It found a home on the piano in the drawing room (at Sandringham) with the giraffe you kindly sent me last year. The Princes (Andrew and Edward) of course adore them.” This and many other written ephemera is currently on display in SIR HARDY AMIES, A Century of Couture at the House of Hardy Amies, 14, Savile Row.
Liz Taylor laments over Jackson Across the pond, Dame Elizabeth Taylor has asked if ‘the world’ does nothing else this Christmas then it should go to the movie theatre to watch ‘This Is It’. Twittering, the Oscar winner aged 77, wrote; “It is the single most brilliant piece of filmmaking I have ever seen,” adding, “you owe it to yourselves and your loved ones to see this again and again. Memorize it and say to yourselves, ‘I saw genius in my lifetime.’” Aside from being in the movie theatre herself, so overjoyed is she by the film, Elizabeth is set to be spending Christmas at home in Bel Air with her family.
Norton’s Christmas box of delights What would Graham Norton like for Christmas? A ‘close friend’ says he’s making the presenter (who has recently endured a huge pay cut from his BBC bosses) copies of Mae West’s rendition of ‘Rock Around the Clock’, ‘Great Ball’s of Fire’, ‘Twist and Shout’ and, from the film Myra Breckinridge, ‘You Gotta Taste all the Fruit’. Yes, the Come Up and See Me Sometime Hollywood film legend actually made pop music during the sixties in an attempt to attract ‘youth.’ Eager to learn more? Then you should visit Mae West on You Tube. I’ve seen it and let’s just say Graham Norton’s either in for a treat or a nightmare!
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Oh, Big Brother; Who’s next? Read it here first... There’s said to have been much chatter in the BB production suite over who’ll be in the last ever celebrity Big Brother scheduled for January 2010. Pamela Anderson, who is in pantomime this Christmas in Wimbledon (and looking for some presenting work on the BBC) is close to broke following a gargantuan overspend on her LA mansion. She has already declared, though, that she is ‘not going in there’ as has Richard Madeley (without his beloved Judy – oh, go on Judy, join Richard PLEASE!) Other ‘serious’ contenders are rumoured to be Ladette-to-lady Principal and task-master Gill Harbord (nicknamed Miss Sideboard) by wannabee socialites at Eggleston Hall, Eurovision songstress Gina G, X-Factor winner Shane Warne and Pop Idol turned yo-yo dieter Michelle McManus, madcap cook Nancy Lamb, Angela Rippon, 1960s American TV star Mary Crosby (below, the gal who pulled the trigger and shot JR Ewing on Dallas in 1980), songstress Betty Boo and even A-listers Victoria Wood and Jennifer Saunders (above). No matter who makes the final grade, Celebrity Big Brother is always much more entertaining than watching mere mortals! Just cast your minds back to the days of Vanessa Feltz, Jackie Stallone, Pete Burns and Anne Diamond...
ABSOLUTE
B1209_024 Celeb column Nov 09.in1 1
17/11/09 09:58:06