CHAPTER 29 THE TREASURE OF MEMORIES After Iman’s tragic demise, I went to London, hoping against hope that by leaving her city, I might be able to get some relief from my intense pain and agony, but nothing of this sort could ever happen. Her memory was like a sharp dagger which always remained firmly pierced into my heart. Whenever I was in a gathering, my attention was diverted for a while, but the moment I was alone, I was surrounded by her two large eyes. Her two pearls and her last letter became my companions and for several hours, we would talk to each other. Quite astonishingly, whenever I remembered her, my solitude appeared to be a gathering for me, and while I was in a gathering, I often felt lonely. The moment I was in a crowd of people, I would feel lonely and wait for hours for the dispersing of the crowd, so that in my solitude, I might again be able to enjoy the company of Iman’s memories. Among my friends, Kamran alone knew the real condition of my heart. When for the first time, I told him about Iman’s death, he was stunned and remained in a state of shock for a long time. Till then, he believed that Iman must have been married to someone else, because during the last two years, he had not visited Pakistan and I too had not been in contact with him since my coming to the railway station. On hearing my woeful tale, he was so much upset that I had to give him sleeping pills that night. For several days, he remained annoyed with me for not informing him of the traumas through which I had been passing. Moreover, he was surprised at the exceptional strength of my nerves which had kept me alive despite all the tragic happenings. I did not have the courage to tell him that the continuation of my life was the source of greatest embarrassment for me. I wished I should have lost all my senses and perished that very moment when Iman breathed her last. The continuation of my life was a punishment which she had awarded to me while departing from this world and I was still alive undergoing the same punishment. Rebecca too always complained to me that I often remained lost somewhere else even in a gathering. But that day, she was annoyed with me for some other reason. I told her in the morning that during the previous night, I had my dinner with Sarah at her home. At that time, Rebecca was trying to make a snowman with the snow that had gathered along the canal after the overnight snowfall. In this attempt, her white hands had turned red and were now becoming blue. The moment I told her about the dinner at Sarah’s home, she left the snow and rushed towards me. “What! Did you go to Sarah’s home last night for dinner without even telling me?” “The fact is that she made this offer at about 3-30 in the afternoon yesterday and by that time, you were gone. Afterwards, I spent the whole evening in the library and that’s why I’m telling it to you now.” Rebecca became somewhat depressed. “I don’t know what happens to me when I see you with Sarah. But the fault is mine because a single gust of cool refreshing breeze cannot suffice everyone and nor can a single shower of rain bring fertility to every patch of land. Anyhow, I’ve no complaints to make and I’m contented with my lot and pleased with whatever share of it I’ve got.” Before Rebecca could say something else, Sarah was seen coming towards us. In view of the cold snowy weather, she was wearing black jeans, dark red high necked sweater and special shoes to protect her feet from snow. On her shoulders, she had the same jacket which I had given to her during the previous night to save herself from the severe cold. Rebecca could easily recognize my jacket and on seeing Sarah with my jacket, she again became busy with her snowman. Sarah gave me my jacket and remarked, “Here’s your jacket and thanks a lot for taking care of me last night.” “Sir Isaac must have thoroughly searched all the pockets of my jacket in solitude after my departure.” Sarah gave a loud laugh. “Now, He isn’t as bad as that. In fact he himself apologized to me after you left.” “Oh that’s wonderful.” Rebecca dried her hands that had become wet with snow and spoke, “Well, I [‘m going inside the campus, otherwise, I may lose my hands in the snow.”
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