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SEVEN DAYS is published by Da Capo Publishing, Inc. every Wednesday. It is distributed free of charge in greater Burlington, Middlebury, Montpelier, Stowe, the Mad River Valley, Rudand, St. Albans and Plattsburgh- Circulation: 20,000. Six-month First Class sub scriptions are available for $40. Oneyear First Class subscriptions are available for $80. Six-month Third Class subscriptions are available for $20. One-year Third Class subscrip tions are available for $40. Please call 802.864.5684 with your VISA or Mastercard, or mail your check or money order to “Subscriptions” at the address below. For Classifieds/Personals or display advertising please call the number below. SEVEN DAYS shall not be held liable to any advertiser for any loss that results from the incorrect publi cation of its advertisement. If a mistake is ours, and the advertising purpose has been rendered valueless, SEVEN DAYS may cancel the charges for the advertise ment, or a portion thereof as deemed reasonable by the publisher.

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Tactics, 'tude, and Teflon keep Vince llluzzi in the senator's seat

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By Paula Routly.............................................page 8

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By Ruth Horowitz...............................................page11

c la s s ifie d s .............................................

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Pre-Christian Coalition

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Burlington pagans promote the rite stuff

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Op-ed: Tracking down kid killers in Missouri — Colorado

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By Ron Powers ................................. .......... page 16

the mostly unfabulous social life of ethan greene ........... . ................ page 4 6

Time P assages Music: Charlie Chaplin Film Festival page 18

COVER PHOTO BY MATTHEW THORSEN COVER DESIGN BY DONALD R. EGGERT

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Young Blood

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An Italian in Vermont

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Art Review: Luigi Lucioni

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may 5,1999

SEVEN DAYS

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Q U O TE CORRECTION The article, “O ut of Bounds?” [April 28], written by your reporter Ruth Horowitz, deserves special credit for the balance and investigative report ing which she gave to the entire story. This county in Vermont needs more reporters like Ruth who take a story and discover the facts before publishing it as news. My concern which follows is not to be blamed on Ruth, for interviewing a person by phone is not only difficult, when the reporter wants to actually quote the person being interviewed, but the encounter with a reporter by the person being interviewed is somewhat trau matic and could lead to mis speaking. Either reason could have produced the misquote in her article. In the interview, we had been discussing my concern about the teaching of immorali ty in our schools — specifically, that: “homosexuality is an acceptable life style.” To me, whether or not the lifestyle is “acceptable” is a matter for the family to discuss and the schools should stay out of tak ing sides with such a controver sial issue. The conversation continued, as Ruths article does in the next-to-last column on page 15, that the school district does not discriminate (and may even hire homosexuals, we don’t ask) but that I felt the teaching of homo

FRESH

sexuality as an acceptable lifestyle was wrong. To empha size this point, I even said, as Ruth quoted me but left out one word, “that,” when I said something like: “I wouldn’t want my child being taught that by a homosexual,” and the word was either missed or I misspoke in my eagerness to emphasize the point of where such material should be taught. If the quote is correct (when taken out of context of my con cerns), then I apologize and ask forgiveness from any persons whom I may have offended. I refer to the words which were highlighted on page 13 during the editorid p rocess, in laying out the article. My concern for the homosexuals and the lifestyle they lead, which could result in death, will not be easy to explain to those who don’t realize my concern for our stu dents and the need for them to hear the pros and cons of any issue, especially an issue which is so controversial, as this is! — Tut Parmly Richmond UNBALANCED REPORT Your article last week about the controversy at Mount Mansfield High School [“Out of Bounds?” April 30] was of great interest to me as an MMU School District Director. Two issues separate from the main subject of the article disturb me. I am extremely unhappy that Seven Days apparently

made no effort to speak to any other MMU Board member except Mr. Parmly prior to pub lication of the article concerning our high school. That strikes me as not being balanced reporting. More importantly, in order to attempt to set the record straight I want to assure you and your readers that Mr. Parmly’s views are not shared by all (or likely a majority) of the the MMU Board. I am person- . ally appalled at the quote you chose to highlight in your story and, as chair of the Personnel Committee, can state with assurance that we do not dis criminate in any way against any person or group in our hir ing or retention process. Any damage to our reputa tion as a school board has already been done by publica tion of your story, but I hope to take the first step to restoring the credibility of our board as fair and responsible representa tives of our community. — Alan M. Mendel Jericho

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CORRECTION: In last week’s story “O ut of Bounds?” about Awareness Week at Mt. Mansfield Union High School, Tut Parmly was incorrectly identified as a member of the Chittenden East School Board. There is no such entity. Parmly serves on the Mt. Mansfield Union School Board, which is part of the Chittenden East Supervisory Union. Sorry for the confusion.

TEACHING TOLERANCE? I was somewhat concerned about the outcome of the situa tion involving Nat Harrison, her son Abram and Mt. Mansfield High School [“Out of Bounds?” April 28]. I was under the impression that Awareness Week was about teaching tolerance. W hat a sur prise it was to see that it quickly became an issue of right versus

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wrong. Each side is entitled to their own opinion and the right to defend it. I do not agree with everyone I meet, nor do I always approve of how someone chooses to live, however, toler ance is accepting that each of us is different. To infer that as long as no invitation is extended to the ex-gay minister, the charges will be dropped, defeats the purpose of the lesson, does it not ? — Joanne Machia Huntington

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would he have fought in World War II to stop Hitlers conquest? A little better, thanks. It really does help “Absolutely,” he replied. “Where is the con when you talk about it. In Washington, D.C., its duck-and-run time,: cern about Mr. Milosevic? The organized rape of 20,000 women? The executions? Are Progressives which is why you don’t hear of congressmen or supposed to turn their backs on that? Is that senators holding town meetings on the subject of what being a Progressive is about?” asked the the War in Yugoslavia. Except here in Vermont, founder of the Congressional Progressive caucus. where our only congressman bravely did just that Another veteran of the Sanderista revolution Monday night. In the sweat box of the Pavilion of the 1980s, Seth Lipschutz, told the Monday Auditorium in Montpeculiar, Bernie Sanders gathering he could no longer keep silent. “A seg stood before a standing-room-only gathering and ment of the left is missing the boat on this one,” took the heat, literally. he said. “If ever there was a time to counter mass The 220 folks in the audience murder and rape, this could spanned four generations, from a be the time.” World War II bombardier to the Almost 40 people stepped colorful skateboard and spikedup to the mike to voice their hair set. In between were the kids very sincere feelings about the of the Cold War and veterans of NATO attack on Belgrade. the anti-war movement of the Everyone who wanted to had ’60s. And most people in the their say. Those who wanted room had two wishes: that the to call Bernie Sanders a “sell NATO bombing stop immediate out” and a “warmonger” had ly, and the auditorium’s ventila their say as well. Democracy is tion system kick on before peo a precious commodity. ple started fainting in the swel Beautiful to watch. tering enclosure. One woman noted that One out of two ain’t bad. Ol’ Bernardo was “the only The gathering had the flavor congressman” she knew who of a ’60s teach-in. Sanders set the would have a public meeting line-up. You could fill Lake on such a touchy subject, Champlain twice over with all knowing full well that “half of we don’t know about Yugoslavia, the audience would get up its history, its politics and its and condemn him.” people. The panelists actually “I would be very happy if managed to shed a little light on it was only half,” replied the subject and provide some of BY PETER FREYNE Sanders, in one of the rare the context for the horrific hap light moments of a very hot night. penings of the day. When the cat callers started Meanwhile, while Bernie takes all the heat, in, Ol’ Bernardo was quickly in their faces, don’t expect GOP Sen. Jim Jeffords to hold a demanding and winning order and respect. similar town meeting any time soon. Jeezum Jim Clearly the audience was split. One segment got great play over the weekend as he donned was passionately behind an immediate end to the blue jeans and work boots to pick up trash in the NATO bombing of Yugoslavia. Some were Burlington Intervale as part of Green-Up Day. among the 15 arrested for trespassing in Bernie’s He’s on a roll. Burlington office last week. Corrections — Last week, we got Sen. Jean A smaller bunch supported the NATO mili Ankeney’ s 77th birthday wrong. It’s March 29, tary campaign with gusto, wished it had come not April 29. Sorry, Senator! sooner, and called for the head of Slobodan Ankeney and fellow Sen. Janet Munt, 76, Milosevic, dictator and war criminal — the comprise the unofficial “Granny Caucus.” They monster behind the siege of Sarajevo, the shelling really are quite unique, Lt. Gov. Doug Racine of Vukovar and the mass execution of 7000 boys pointed out recently. “Unlike the rest of us,” said and men in Srebrenica. Racine, “who worry about getting reelected,” But the largest segment in Montpelier Jean and Janet “have no political fear.” True Monday night was somewhere in the middle. enough, the dynamic duo is scorned by the Torn between a deeply held commitment to Statehouse business lobbyists, who grudgingly peace and the responsibility to stand up to the accept the fact that they’re unable to successfully fascism and genocide. spin either one of them. Old Vermont leftists found themselves on “They have no fear of people being mad at opposite sides for the first time on this one. them,” said Racine the Conqueror, “or of not Among them was Marc Estrin of Burlington. He getting support in the next election. It’s just not rose to to tell the congressman, whom he has part of their equation.” long supported, “You’re leaving us behind.” Also, two weeks ago, Inside Track incorrectly Sanders’ acceptance of the “power politics mon identified the hotel at which the pharmaceutical ster,” warned Estrin, “will erode your support.” company reps picked up the tab for lawmakers Indeed, on the Internet’s UVM “ANTIWAR” attending the American Legislative Exchange listserv, where some progressives have vented Council dinner. It was held at Rep. Dick their political views of late, Sanders’ longtime Matron’ s Town & Country spa in beautiful political ally, Rep. Terrill Bouricius, has parted Stowe. Sorry, Dick. company with him. These two have been con Speaking of drugs, you may recall our report nected at their political left hips for over 20 on how one drug company lobbyist, Andrew years. MacLean, warned lawmakers drug companies In a posting last Thursday, the spacier half of might boycott Vermont if S.88 ever sees the light The Self-Righteous Brothers announced he was of day. That’ s the bill that would set pharmaceu “saddened and angered to hear of Bernie’s vote tical prices in Vermont at the much lower price on supporting continued NATO bombing.” Uncle Sam pays. However, Marjorie Powell, Bouricius charged that Bernie “seems to be will assistant general counsel for the Pharmaceutical ing to accept what I believe to be NATO/U.S. Research and Manufacturers of America propaganda.” While calling Sanders “on whole, (PHRMA) told Rep. Paul Poirier’s committee the best congressman by far,” Bouricius writes, Friday that drug companies “will sell their drugs “his support for super-power violation of interna wherever there is a market.” As for the threat of a tional law has earned my condemnation.” boycott, she replied, “if anyone said that, they’re How honored! To be condemned by a Selfin trouble. We don’t have borders that let you do Righteous Brother! that in this country.” Shown Terry’s remarks during a Seven Days MacLean sat quietly in the corner of the com interview Monday, Sanders replied, “Terry’s enti mittee room. Paul the Puckster was looking in tled to his opinion. But he’s wrong!” his direction, but the lobbyist wasn’t making eye Yes, Bernie was against the Vietnam War and contact with the chairman just then. ® the Contra War and Grenada and Panama, but MNM

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Odd, strange, curious and weird but true news items from every corner of the globe

I Fly the Friendly Skies Japan Airlines banned smoking on all its international flights but said it would offer passengers who find smoke-free flying unbearable another means of oral gratification. They will receive a litde plastic tube in the shape o f a cigarette to put in their mouths to help suppress the urge to smoke. • British Airways began offer ing travelers loans of between $800 to $24,000 to help them pay for their vacations. The loans carry a 15.9 percent annual interest rate, and borrowers will have two years to repay. Customers who pay off their loan within three months won’t be charged any interest.

Curses, Foiled Again While serving six years in a [ minimum security prison in Oslo, Norway, for the theft of Edvard Munch’s painting “The Scream,” Paal Enger escaped during an outing. He was quickly recaptured at a train station when he attracted the attention o f authorities by wearing sunglasses at night.

Far from Over A five-year-old U.S. govern ment program to find peaceful work for nuclear scientists from the former Soviet Union has been far from a success, accord ing to an audit by the General Accounting Office, which

reported that the scientists actually received less than a third of the program’s $63.5 million. W hat’s more, the GAO said, some of the money may have been used by scien tists to continue working on Russia’s weapons programs and in some cases possibly on chemical and biological weapons of mass destruction.

Love Hurts A five-year-old albatross liv ing on an island 375 miles south of Tokyo has spent the past two years trying to mate with a decoy by building it fancy nests, fighting off rival suitors and spending countless days standing faithfully beside it. A spokesperson for the Yamashina Institute of Ornithology explained that the object of the bird’s affection is one of nearly 100 decoys placed on the Izu islands to attract endangered albatrosses and encourage them to breed, but with each other, not the decoys.

Leading by Example Chicago alderman Larry Bloom, who enjoyed a reputa tion as a stickler for ethics, was sentenced to six months in fed eral prison for cheating on his taxes. He pleaded guilty to reporting $9000, including a $6000 payoff he took from a corrupt contractor, as rental income.

Seen Bob Dole Lately? A report issued by the fed eral Food and Drug Administration listed the fol lowing possible side-effects of the anti-impotence drug Viagra: “Abnormal hair growth, speech disorder, amnesia, loss of libido, hallucination, anorexia, tinnitus, skin discol oration, hiccups, sleep-walking, eye-rolling, hostility, euphoric mood, dry mouth, agita tion, confusion, insom nia, abnormal think ing, abnormal skin odor, depression, increased sweating, flatulence, abnormal dreams and belching.”

Odorific A Singapore court sen tenced truck driver Zainal Mohamed Esa, 43, to 25 weeks in jail for stealing people’s shoes. According to his lawyer, Rai Ratan Kumar, Zainal did not steJ the shoes to sell but out of a “burning desire, akin to that of a drug addict, to sniff used pairs of shoes.” The lawyer explained that Zainal, who had 40 pairs of shoes when he was caught last November and another 28 pairs when he was nabbed again in January, kept the shoes until the smell wore off, then donated them to the Salvation Army or tried to return them to their owners. • When dancers at a strip club

in Erie, Pennsylvania, became : suspicious because Stephen P. Woitkowski, 23, and his friend Joseph Dibble tipped them nearly $8000 in two days, the club’s owner notified authori ties after noticing that the money smelled peculiar. Investigators arrested Woitkowski, accus-

him of taking $500,000 in cash from the safe of his fiancee’s parents, Ted and Carolyn Salchak, who did not trust banks with their money. “It had that musty smell because some of the cash spent upwards of 30 years in the Salchaks’ safe,” Millcreek Township Detective Lt. William Detisch said, adding that Woitkowski’s arrest ended a spending spree during which he bought three vehicles, including a new MercedesBenz, video and stereo equip ment, and took his mother on a gambling trip to Atlantic City.

The Loneliest Number A Brazilian court set aside 37 square miles in Rondonia

state to create a reservation solely to protect an Indian her mit who lives there. The court ruled that the man, in his thir ties, was at risk from ranchers, loggers, farmers and others who occupy the Amazon region, as well as from diseases like colds and flu, which can kill adults not previously exposed to such germs. Government anthropolo gists from the National Indian Foundation said they have seen the man in the rainforest three times, including last August, when they offered him presents and he answered by shooting an arrow at them.

Talking Trash Collecting garbage is the third-riskiest job in the coun try, particularly in Florida, according to research conduct ed for the Florida Center for Solid and Hazardous Waste Management. Citing impatient drivers who pass stopped col lection trucks and run into workers, the study concluded that trash collectors in Florida suffer 90 deaths per 100,000 workers a year, nearly twice the national average for the job, making it riskier than flying an airplane and almost three times as dangerous as driving a cab. The researchers said the only riskier jobs are fishing and logging. C

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CHARLOTTE

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June 12 Charlotte Recreation Amy Cluff: 425-3094

June 5, 26 & July 24 Middlebury Recreation Alex Davydov: 388-4041

COLCHESTER

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June 5,8,12,16 Colchester Parks & Recreation * Bill Kohlasch: 655-0822

June 5,8 Milton Recreation* Dan Bonfigli: 893-4922

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June 5 2 Barn Tennis Center* Paul Dayton: 229-4172

May 15 Montpelier Recreation* Wendy Watson: 223-7971

ESSEX May 8 Racquet's Edge* Dan Bonfigli: 879-7734, x2 June 12 Essex Junction Parks & Recreation * Dann Vandervleet: 878-6944 June 12 Essex Town Recreation* Janet Post: 878-1342

I T E N N I S I

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SEVEN DAYS

may5,1999

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WINOOSKI May 18, 20, 22, 26 Winooski Parks & Recreation* Bob Dimasi: 655-6860

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page 6

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ts been interesting to sanctity of the fireside.” names in print. A friend of watch the Littleton “Not that all firesides are mine who’s been covering tragedy from a 90-year sacred,” the editorial contin the Littleton story for USA remove, as I’ve been doing. ued. “Few indeed can claim % Today says she’s never seen so Slowly but surely, I’m finish any degree of saintliness. The many camera-sawy children expression ‘sanctity of the ing a biography of Isadora in one place. They primp, Duncan, who made her first fireside’ is merely used here they preen, they rehearse appearance on Broadway in as a form of speech to desig their lines — “You’d better 1908. I’ve been buried in old nate the home of one’s wife, hurry up,” said one, “I’m one’s daughters, of one’s copies of The New York going to New York to be on mother and sisters, which Times, which on August 8 of “The Today Show” and that year ran a story lament “Sally Jesse Raphael.” should remain inviolate from ing “the alarming spread of These kids are in for a the invasion of people whose bohemianism” in American rude awakening when the notions of decency and society. Nineteen-oh-eight respectability are of a dis cameras depart. Busloads of was the year of the “Salome” counselors and social work tinctly inferior, and some craze, when “any dancer who ers have descended on times even of the lowest, order.” can point her toes and wave Colorado, of course, like the Take that, Y2K — “spin” her arms about” was wowing pioneers of old, urging “grief American audiences with her wasn’t invented last week. O f work,” “closure” and “heal own variation on “The ing.” But the kids are more course, the popular image of the peaceful, self-contained Dance of the Seven Veils.” interested in celebrity than mental health, and they nuclear family was as much a “Her feet, slender and fiction in 1908 as it is today, arched, beat a sensual mea know that fame is more fun when its true purpose as a sure,” read a publicity release than a drippy support group. for the most famous Salome, Raised in an asylum of white unit of economic producMaud Allan: “The male conformity, each of them desire that flames from her lips and locked in his or Busloads of counselors bursts in hot her own private and social work flames from her techno-bubble, scarlet mouth with six or seven descended on Colorado, of shotguns in the infects the air with the madness closet and a com course, like the pioneers of passion. bined attention Swaying like a span of about 20 white witch with seconds, it’s a mir "c lo su re " and "hea yearning arms and acle they aren’t all hands that plead, shooting each kids are m ore, Miss Allan is such other, and don’t a delicious be surprised if interested in celebrity. embodiment of they do. lust that she On Saturday, might win forgiveness with tion, earning, spending and Charlton Heston was in the sins of her wonderful consuming in wasteful isola Denver defending your right flesh.” tion is more abundantly to bear arms — for that mat As Salome, Maud Allan clear. What’s changed in our ter, to amass as big an arse danced with a papier-rruiche time is the dimension of the nal as you want, for any rea head of John the Baptist, lie, along with the technolo son you want. “We’re not dripping with fake blood, gies and philosophies that peddling heroin,” Heston which she kissed on the lips have “virtually” eliminated said, as if this were a recom in the “sinful” denouement. the concept of private life. mendation. “Our mission is (To measure the shock of ! Everyone’s story is prop to remain a steady beacon of this gesture, you might think erty now. Culture has been strength and support for the of Madonna rubbing herself entirely personalized. In Second Amendment, even if with a crucifix or “Mother 1908, New York was in it has no other friend on the Bernadette Mary” — the thrall to the Haines-Annis planet. We cannot let featherhead formerly known murder case, in which a cap tragedy lay waste to the most tain of the 48th Artillery at as Sinead O ’Connor — rip- . rare and hard-won human ping up a picture of the Fort Hancock, Peter Haines, right in history.” Pope.) Jr., had shot and killed Life, liberty and the pur “I cannot imagine any William Annis, an advertis suit of assault weapons! With thing more immoral and less ing executive, whom he sus “history” lessons like this, it’s artistic than this passionless pected of being his wife’s no wonder Eric Harris wrote aping of the gestures of lust, lover. Reached for comment in his diary: “I WILL shoot this intoxication hammered to kill. KILL EVERY by the Times, Mrs. Haines out cold,” one New York THIN G.” declared, “He’s crazy.” critic wrote in disgust. That Nobody ever saw her pic “No,” Harris added, “I Maud Allan, Isadora and am not crazy. Crazy is just a ture. other “exotic dancers and word, to me it has no mean Compare this now to theatrical personalities” were ing.” Judging by news Littleton, where the televi now “received” in the most reports, I gather you can get sion networks have beaten fashionable American homes an A+ at most American their own sadistic records seemed to' herald the collapse high schools for writing an poking the dead with sticks. of civilization. The Times essay on this theme. There’s Columbine High School stu urged its readers “to main your “explanation” for dents have literally been tain in all its integrity what Littleton, and all the closure crawling over the bodies of you’re going to get, (Z) has been described as the their classmates to see their

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EA T Paula Routly ince the Prince.” “King o f the Kingdom.” “The Sleaze.” Senator Vince Illuzzi had plenty of nicknames before he picked up a more sober-sounding tide last fall: “Mr. States Attorney.” As the Vermont Legislature heats up in anticipation of adjournment, nobody has more irons in the fire than the sharp-featured chair o f the powerful Senate Institutions Committee. Since February, when he took over prosecutorial duties in Essex County, Illuzzi has been jug gling arraignments, status con ferences and court cases along with bills, caucuses and floor votes — a tall order, even for a guy with two addresses and five phone numbers. Smart, tenacious and some times self-serving, 45-year-old Illuzzi is a consummate political

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strategist. After 19 years under the Golden Dome, “he clearly knows the legislative process better than anyone else in the state, and can make it work for the benefit of his constituents,” says Deputy Auditor of Accounts John Howland. The son of a state senator and long time political observer, Howland describes the lanky and magnetic Italo-American as “a great operator.” “Smooth operator” would definitely be stretching it, though. Over the years, Illuzzi has been a magnet for contro versy. Some of his methods have raised eyebrows, and generated allegations about shady dealings and abuses of power. As a lawyer, he has come before the Professional Conduct Board five times on charges that he over stepped his bounds — and on the last two had his law license suspended for it. “He has a tremendous politi

cal compass. There is no doubt about that,” says Chris Braithwaite, editor of the Barton Chronicle. “But his moral com pass points in the most conve nient direction.” Although he clearly doesn’t like being dissed, Illuzzi takes the jabs in stride, and with good humor. His “bad boy” reputa tion has only enhanced his intrigue. He belongs in the Statehouse — this life-long bachelor who derives as much pleasure from positioning semi colons in state statutes as he does yukking it up with reporters over beers. While other legislators are dozing, Illuzzi is e-mailing, reading let ters, writing notes and dashing off to fax, phone or get more caffeine on credit. lluzzi has at least two balls in the air on a recent Thursday morning as the Senate Judiciary Committee debates

the third draft of a computer crimes bill. Hunched over the a pile o f papers, he’s finishing off another law that would stan dardize Fish and Wildlife fines. He pays close attention when his own amendment comes up, though — a seemingly ho-hum document about the proper posting of stop signs. But the last line raises questions, and the sudden appearance of Defender General Robert Appel suggests there is more to it than meets the eye. “It sounds like a pardon to me,” one committee member pipes up, after considering the implications of Illuzzi’s request: giving a state’s attorney power to reinstate a driver’s license before pending traffic tickets get paid — a privilege currently afforded only the governor. Illuzzi argues that having the discretion to “vacate prior judg ments” would help get cashstrapped offenders back on their

feet while they pay back their fines as a condition of proba tion. He should know — he deals with such cases on a regu lar basis. Illuzzi is visibly disappointed when the six-member commit tee votes to approve all but the questionable last line, pending comment from Appel, who promises to give it some thought overnight. But as soon as the Defender General exits, Illuzzi slips out the door after him, to make his case in the hall. “I told him I think its a great idea,” Appel said later, “but I don’t know if it’s Constitutional.” Personally and politically, Illuzzi is a pragmatist. A selfdescribed blue-collar Republican who got nominated by both parties last time around, Illuzzi defies categorization with an eclectic approach to politics that some, including Braithwaite, say is “too flexible.” He votes with the Democrats on minimum wage and stood by Dean — lit erally — on the Champion land deal. Although he votes conserv ative on gun control, parental notification and property rights, Illuzzi is the first to admit mem bers of his own party don’t trust him. Some of his best friends are Democrats.

“ D e s p i t e ----

“I don’t think I had the artistic ability he had,” says Illuzzi, who made an effort to find one of his father’s monuments on a recent trip to Washington, D.C. Despite the dollars he designates for cultural institutions like the Flynn Theatre and the Fleming Museum, Illuzzi dismisses the arts as “touchy feely.” He downplays his ethnic heritage, too, even though his gift for debate and dual interests in business and architecture are classic Italian. Ditto his eye for interior design. Although he was a huge supporter of the Statehouse renovation, Illuzzi has been the most outspoken critic of a proposed new carpet for the Senate. He prefers the astro-turf green rug currently in place. His 18-room Victorian home in Orleans is filled with antiques. Illuzzi definitely likes histo ry, but has more to say about specific political battles than any Machiavellian scheme, or phi losophy, that might have brought him here. He rattles off dates and votes like they were yesterday. “None of this was planned,” he insists over yet another cup of coffee in the Statehouse cafeteria. In fact, his first brush with politics was an unexpected appointment to the

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lancer who for three months earned more than the Capital Bureau Chief. When he did finally gradu ate, in 1978, he got an unusual job offer — to serve as Deputy State’s Attorney in Orleans County under Leroy Null, who got elected to the job without having a law degree. Illuzzi got into hot water the very first day, over a speeding ticket he picked up on the way to work. Null tried to get the charges dropped by saying Illuzzi was on the way to investigate a crime, which was a lie. On cross-examination, Illuzzi backed his boss, and got his first black mark from the Professional Conduct Board. “There were no murder cases,” Illuzzi remembers of his trial-by-fire job training, “just the garden variety of cases you see in district court.” But the experience was more challenging because Illuzzi had “no help, no experience. I don’t know how I did it. Because Null was so dis liked. . .1 couldn’t pick up the phone and call the Attorney General’s office and ask, ‘What is the law in this area?”’ He racked up two more reprimands on Null’s watch — one for allegedly dispatching a state trooper to interview a defen dant.

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C O N T R O V E R S IA L Former Senator John McClaughry chalks it up to a “gut populist instinct,” noting he and Illuzzi agreed on “quite a few things” while they served together in the Senate. “He has a great rapport with ordinary people who are trying to earn a living — Northeast Kingdom shopkeepers, loggers, truck dri vers, teachers,” McClaughry says. Saying Illuzzi has a knack for drafting legislation that pleases as many people as possi ble, he adds, “Vince takes very seriously his role of trying to speak for them.” lluzzi hails from hardscrabble origins himself. His Italianborn parents settled in the Barre area long after the immi grant wave — his mother didn’t arrive until 1952, from the coastal city of Bari. She took care of three sons while her hus band worked as a self-employed granite sculptor. Illuzzi describes his upbringing as “average mid dle-class,” confirming later that he and his brothers didn’t learn English until first grade. His father worked hard and, like most Italian laborers, was pro-union — a tradition carried on by his Republican son. But the granite-cutting trade held no interest for young Vincenzo.

state board of education while he was still a biology major at St. Michael’s College. “I remember being initially frustrated at how slow govern ment works,” he says of the extracurricular experience that put him at the table with politi cal heavyweights like Barbara Snelling, whom Illuzzi calls a “country-club Republican.” “Then you learn the ropes, and who the key players are.” At Vermont Law School, he was recruited to run for a stu dent spot on the board of trustees, and ended up rubbing elbows with high-ranking jus tices like James Oakes and Franklin Billings. It was a very controversial tenure — perhaps a foreshadowing of his future wranglings with the court. “We had huge fights,” he says, over whether students who had fin ished their credit requirements could leave school early. It was his first of many eloquent argu ments for the underdog. Not that Illuzzi was a model attorney-in-training. He paid • his way through law school by working as a stringer for The Burlington Free Press — a job that did not afford him a whole lot of time for classes or study. Then-editor Howland remem bers Illuzzi as a prolific free-

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him about the concealed-gun law. A representative from the Vermont Burma Alliance also wants a word with the senator, and follows him up the stairs to make his pitch. Illuzzi settles into the Senate Cloak Room, and in the role of unfeeling studio exec, hears the fellow out. He stays tuned to the Senate proceedings while Rick Hausman nervously gives him a crash course on human rights abuses in Burma, and argues for a resolution to identi fy companies doing business there. Although he fires off a few questions, Illuzzi is clearly not interested. Southeast Asia is a long way from the Northeast Kingdom. When a fellow senator men tions a failing farm in Richford, however, the lawmaker is all ears. More than anything, he is motivated to enrich his district, which has the lowest per capita income in Vermont. W ith capi tal projects like the $16 million revitalization of downtown Newport, he makes no apolo gies for bringing home the bacon. He also delivers road signs, forest land, historical society grants, rest areas, opera houses and state prisons to his district. Illuzzi is renowned for his con-

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When Null resigned and then died a few weeks later, Illuzzi expected to succeed him. But Republican Governor Richard Snelling blocked his appointment. “He hated me,” Illuzzi says, blaming the bad blood between them on a cou ple stories he wrote for the Free Press that showed the governor in an unfavorable light. In 1980, Illuzzi gave up on the deputy state’s attorney job and made a bid for the state senate instead. “He campaigned very, very hard, and was popular with the ladies cooking the church suppers,” Chris Braithwaite recalls. “Somehow he has a personality that is entirely his own and works, politically, very well.” At 27, Illuzzi became the youngest state senator in Vermont history — a record he still holds nearly two decades later. lluzzi looks more like a monarch than a man of the people as he works the Statehouse corridors on the day he will present the capital bill on the Senate floor. Trailing an entourage of reporters and lob byists, he ribs a member of the administration about his boss, “Ho Dean.” Free Press reporter Jeff Good wants to talk with

“ Y O U A

“R-D” on the Republican and Democratic tickets, and made a simultaneous bid for Essex County state’s attorney as an independent. He beat incum bent Jan Paul by a nearly twoto-one margin. The part-time job pays $45,000 a year, and keeps Illuzzi hopping, in part because Paul refused to let him see any of the pending court cases until his first day on the job. Illuzzi’s worried about missing dead lines, especially for D.W.I. cases, which must be heard within 41 days of the date of the offense. He may have already lost one high-profile case — the Christmas Eve caroler who was struck by a drunk driver. The civil suspension hearing was two days past deadline, and the defense has moved to dismiss the case. “Somebody is going to nail my ass for it,” Illuzzi says, even though he says the accident happened before his time and he didn’t schedule the hearing. “One way or the other, some body will make it out to be my fault.” It certainly wouldn’t be the first time Illuzzi took the heat for a procedural error, or had his missteps magnified by the Professional Conduct Board and

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stituent work, and spends hours every day returning phone calls, writing and answering letters and e-mails. His press relations are legendary — look for an upcoming story in the Boston Sunday Globe Magazine. When Associated Press reporter Sue Allen wrote a scathing piece on his pork-barrel politics, he used it as campaign literature. “Vince is always at the cen ter of the information flow. I don’t know how many tele phones he has worn out by now,” McClaughry says. “I’m sure he gets up looking forward to mixing it up with people. Hes an extrovert — always lis tening, advising, with an amaz ing amount of energy. He’s fun to be around, if you don’t have some complaint with him. He loves the job.” Biennial election results sug gest the love is requited. Despite his own financial success — he and his dentist brother have amassed real estate holdings worth more than $ 1 million — Illuzzi maintains an outsider image that keeps him in office. Dick Snelling must have been spinning in his grave last November, when the Illuzzi name showed up on the ballot — twice. He ran a no-sweat campaign for state senate as an

s u r v i v e

” the press. His first license sus pension was on a personal injury case, for negotiating directly with an insurance adjuster instead of the lawyer for the defense. “In that particu lar case, I had some pretty rep utable attorneys come in and testify that what I did was com mon practice,” Illuzzi says. “The standard was not clear. They retroactively applied it to me.” He also feels burned by the subsequent violation, which some say came about as a result of the previous one. There was no love lost between Illuzzi and prosecutor Wendy Collins, who made the case against him for the Professional Conduct Board. But her husband, Judge David Suntag, said he was personally targeted when Illuzzi came for ward to notify him that he was breaking the law. Four years before Illuzzi had authored a law requiring Essex County judges hear family court cases in Guildhall. Suntag was hearing Essex County cases at the court house in Orange County, because it was more convenient for him. Although Illuzzi was backed up by colleagues in the Senate, the Supreme Court ruled that Continued on page 10

may 5.1999

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he was retaliating against Collins by making life difficult for her husband. A second license suspension put him out of business for a total of four years, during which Illuzzi practically lived at the Statehouse. A number of legal authori ties, including Judge Edward Cashman, have since suggested that Illuzzi was unfairly treated — or at least unjustly pun ished. “The severity of the sanctions definitely outweighed the harm done,” Appel says. “He got slammed on it, because of who he is and his history.” Illuzzi’s license was reinstated last July. Although there were plenty of people to kick him when he was down, Illuzzi bounced back — again. “Despite all they have done to me, that I still survive — that is what they can’t believe,” he says, offering as a possible motto: “You are either controversial or you are a nobody.” Although he has no plans to run for statewide office, Illuzzi is clearly somebody. Lieutenant Governor Doug Racine has him summoned in the cafeteria when the Senate is ready to take up his Capital Bill autho rizing the state of Vermont to ' spend $39 million on bricks and mortar. It is Illuzzi’s final report of the session — a 52page amendment to the bill. Members of the Senate listen respectfully as he stands to report on the wannabe law, and he is still listing projects as the sun slips behind Hubbard Park. Not everyone is impressed, though. O n the Statehouse steps, one administration offi cial grumbles, “Illuzzi is up to his old tricks.” He is ripped about the wording around a proposed correctional facility in Springfield. Two things have caught his eye: the coexistence of an amendment requiring that the state prove the pro posed prison property was clear of contamination, and a design note that the building shall be no more than one story. It doesn’t take a rocket sci entist to figure out the combi nation increases the chances of costly remediation problems and extra construction expendi tures. In other words, the pro ject appears designed to fail. And if southeastern Vermont can’t provide a suitable place for a correctional facility, where else could it go? Illuzzi has already offered his district, according to Buildings Commissioner Tom Torti. He knows a great little spot in the Northeast K ingdom ...©

PHOTO: M A T T H E W T H O R SE N

By Ruth Horowitz , _ teven Spielbergs DreamWorks crew is coming to town this • summer, and Burlington-area bone yards are lining up for the casting call. The prize: the once-iri-a-death-time opportu nity to play the role of back drop as Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer perform the grave-side scene in their upcoming picture, What Lies Beneath. Director Robert Zemeckis and ProducerDesigner Rick Carter are dying to find just the right look for this segment, and although the deal hasn’t been nailed down, one viable contender, says Location Manager Shawn Sweeney, is Burlington’s own Lakeview Cemetery. If Lakeview, just south of the high school on North Avenue, does make the final cut, the cemetery’s frost-heaved roadways and bygone fountains will get a new lease on life. National audiences will catch sight of the light sparkling off the lake, the moody shadows cast by the hundred-year-old trees, and the peaceful solemni ty o f the graveyard’s graceful granite needles and mau soleums. But more lies beneath Lakeview’s stone-studded sur

Turning up bygone Burlington at Lakeview Cemetery

face than mere atmospherics. In fact, with the snow melted and the camera crews yet to descend, now is a heavenly time to take a hike among the head-r stones. But be forewarned. Once you enter its iron gates, the cemetery can be positively addictive. All you’ve got to do is “let the place talk to you,” says Richard Kieslich, memori alist, funeral director and chair of the Burlington Cemetery Commission. Lakeview may be the grand est of three public cemeteries in Burlington, but Greenmount Cemetery on Colchester Avenue is the most historic. Its earliest grave belongs to a woman intriguingly named Freelove Wilkins, who died at the age of 18 in 1788. Ethan and Ira Allen are also buried there, as is Mary Fletcher, whose philanthropy funded what’s now called the Fletcher Allen Hospital, as well as Burlington’s Fletcher Free Library. Elmwood Cemetery, in the heart of the Old North End, is Burlington’s bleakest bone yard. Flat, fenced-in, sparsely treed and bounded by Yellow Cabs and T. Rugg’s Tavern, Elmwood was originally known as the Continued on page 12

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page 11

Dead R e ck o n in g Continued from page 11

Unitarian Cemetery. Ethan Allen’s second wife is buried here, along with her second husband. Unfortunately, the identities of many of the ceme tery’s other residents have been lost. In the late 18th century, the cemetery was connected with the debtors’ prison, and a number of its inmates lies there. A host of graves were paved over in the mid-19th century, when Elmwood Avenue was

impressive architecture and, well, good lake views, no necropolis in town stands a ghost of a chance beside Lakeview. Laid out by an archi tect just after the Civil War, Lakeview’s curving paths and exotic trees give the place a romantic, spacious feeling. One meditative meander through the cemetery’s shady groves, and it’s easy to see why the city’s late 19th-century elite opted to establish their eternal home steads here, or why the grave yard’s rusticated shelters were

The anonymous Stranger’s Lot and ostentatious fam ily plots of a century ago suggest a society in which the bap was huge between thej haves and the have-nots. widened. And many of the words on the soft maT51e head stones that remain have simply worn away with time. In the contest for gracious landscaping, luxuriant foliage,

once prize locations for Sunday summer picnics. Today, a stroll through Lakeview is like taking a tour of Burlington’s streets come to life. Near the cemetery’s center,

where a trio of fountains once played and whole dynasties are buried in elegant family plots, * dozens-of impressive obelisks and mighty stones bear a city map’s worth of addresses, including Adsit, Hyde, Loomis, and Booth from-the Old North End; Howard and Englesby from the South End; and Van Patten and Farrington from the New North End. Who were these people? Mostly families with a lot of money who owned a lot of land, then subdivided it. Loomis Street is a six-block stretch just north of the University of Vermont lined by early 20th-century Victorian homes now occupied by a mix of students and families. According to the history books, Phineas Loomis moved to Burlington from Massachusetts in 1790, when bears and sables were still common here. He built the town’s second framed house at Pearl and Williams, today the site of a urologist’s office. At Lakeview, the Loomis name stands in bold relief on the side of a handsome white monument shaped like a casket. Lawrence Barnes Elementary School on North Street is in the heart of the city’s highly impacted Enterprise Community. The man who gave the school its name made

his fortune dealing lumber. His family’s plot at Lakeview fea tures* an elaborately adorned pillar topped with the sculpture of a woman clutching a cross to her bosom and gazing mourn fully out to the world to come. Carvings in the pillar’s base —* carry a sad chronicle of Barnes family losses. Lawrence and Lucinda Barnes buried three infants. Their son Lawrence K. and his wife, Mary Kate, lost three babies in three years before Mary Kate herself died at the age of 25. A more simple obelisk beside the Barnes pillar memo rializes the Howards. In Burlington, Howard Street is a modest residential road running between Pine and Willard, south of downtown. The name is better known today because of the Howard Bank, the Howard Opera House on Church Street, and Howard Human Services — all legacies of the family’s fortune and largess. The fortune came from a group of snazzy New York City Hotels. The largess — mostly distributed by John Purple Howard and his sister Louise in the mid-1880s — helped support a Home for Destitute Children, now known as the Baird Family Center; the Howard Relief Society, now

called Howard Human Services, the Episcopal Church, and Lakeview Cemetery itself, where Howard family dona tions paid for the fountains and the cemetery chapel, currently being restored. Wells and Richardson streets run parallel to each other in Burlington’s South End. William Wells was a Civil War general whose statue you can see in Battery Park — the one that’s not an Indian. An identi cal sculpture stands in Gettysburg. At Lakeview, Wells’ military career is described on a metal plaque set into a boulder. After he was honorably mus tered out of the Union Army in 1866, Wells returned to Burlington. Six years later, he and his friend Alfred Richardson established Wells, Richardson & Company, whose offices still fill almost an entire block of College Street. Originally a manufacturer of pharmaceutical preparations, the business later expanded to produce such household neces sities as Butter Color, KidneyWort and Paine’s Celery Compound. When Wells Richardson was reorganized, Wells became pres ident of Burlington Trust, a pri vate bank that handled the company’s finances. Burlington

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Trust hasn’t existed as an inde pendent entity for some time. The brick building it once occupied at the corner of Church and College streets is now Sweetwaters Restaurant, and the trust company itself merged with Howard Bank. Alfred Richardson lived in a mansion on Williams Street — a building that later became the bishop’s house, and then was torn down to make room for the parking lot behind the University Health Service. The fancy, carved woodwork from the house’s interior is now part of the decor at The Peking Duck Restaurant in Winooski. But Lakeview doesn’t just memorialize the deaths of the rich and famous. At the ceme tery’s entrance, a single stone commemorates Burlington’s “unknowns,” many of them sol diers who succumbed to small pox while billeted at Battery Park during the War of 1812. Just inside the cemetery proper, the flag-festooned veterans’ area memorializes dozens of Burlington’s other war dead. A grid of small, embellished stones, each bearing a number but no name, marks what’s known as the Strangers’ Lot. Wayward women are buried nearby. Babies are buried in bassinet-sized plots in several

special areas throughout the grounds. hen it first opened its gates, Lakeview was primarily Protestant. But as the city grew more diverse and democratic, the neighborhood changed. Today, nearly a third of the cemetery’s residents are Catholic. There’s a Greek section with names like Economou, Poulos, Pappas and Scutakes, and an area owned by Temple Sinai, where friends and family leave small stones and pebbles on the modest monuments — the Jewish tra dition when visiting a grave. Wordy epitaphs are uncom mon at Lakeview. But some of the most eloquent are those composed by parents to memo rialize children who prede ceased them. Michael Klein, who died in 1989 at the age of 37, is remembered as, “truly a gift, loving and humane.” Lili Krekovic Dollar, just 34 when she died that same year, is identified as “O ur loving daughter, sister, wife, mother, teacher and friend.” Her epi taph reads, “The flower is gone, but its fragrance endures in the hearts of those who knew it.” A single white lily and a newly planted bed of pansies bloom at the foot of

P le a s e j o in

the stone cross that bears the woman’s name. Pictures began to replace written epitaphs in the 1970s, when Barre sculptor Al Fantoni developed a technique for etch ing granite with a diamond tip. At Lakeview, these images most often depict the dearly depart eds’ passions. The grave of Walter Often (1942-1995) por trays a golf club and ball. Clarence “CA” Crouch (1926 1988) is buried beneath an ebony marker etched with race cars on a track and the phrase, “a racer’s racer.” Robert Desilet (1939-1979) rests below a por trait of his house boat. And John C. “Pike” Lovejoy (19321975) is remembered by a fullcolor illustration of a man fish ing in a stream from a small power boat while deer placidly graze nearby and the sun sets in the West. Valentine grave stones are also popular. Brenda and Frank Peters’ memorial is a pair of overlapping hearts decorated with two etched portraits of the couple, one from the time when they were married, and the other in their later years. Frank was just 18 when they married, and he died at the age of 43, less than a month before their silver anniversary. “Always remember me for loving you,”

No necropolis in__ J town stands a ghost b f a chance beside lLakeview. 1 the stone pleads. Christine and Stephen E. McMahon hadn’t been married a month when she died at the age of 21, just three years ago. The black stone is decorated with an etching of the couple’s wedding picture, and the words, “In sickness and in health,” in gold leaf. “Monuments are really for the people who are here,” Kieslich explains. “It’s part of the grief process. The designs you have now really are express ing a story of the individual or the family.” An anthropologist might interpret the changing trends in Lakeview’s tombstones in terms of shifting priorities in the broader culture. The anony mous Stranger’s Lot and osten tatious family plots of a century ago suggest a society in which the gap was huge between the haves and the have-nots, where people moved from place to

place much less frequently, and where the haves put their pedi grees on a pedestal. By contrast, today’s memori als, with their busy etchings and personalized messages, hint at a world in which families move around a lot; a world where the way people play is prized over . how they work; and where the individual’s tastes and emotions are taken very seriously. But you don’t have to be an anthropologist or a local history buff to appreciate Lakeview’ charms. As summer approaches, you might simply enjoy the cemetery’s cooling shade trees. Its winding paths and low traf fic provide a welcoming run ning track. And, if Hollywood does bestow its cinematic glam our on the place this summer, you can tell your cousins in Topeka that yOu and your good buddies, Harrison and Mich elle, visit the same graveyard. (Z)

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here was no copulating on the church lawn last Sunday; even the ultratolerant Unitarian Universalists would have had a problem with that. Especially in broad day light. And in front of the chil dren. W hat did transpire — a Maypole dance celebrating the Earth’s rebirth — in fact substi tuted some tiny kids for the lusty young men and women who are supposed to weave rib bons round the symbolic pole and then do some entwining of their own. This was, after all, a fertility ritual once upon a time. But the kids were clueless, if awfully cute. Never mind the binary mathematics of procre ation, these tots struggled with the concept of under, then over. The resulting job on the Maypole — a wobbly weave of yellow, pink and orange plastic streamers — was akin to one of those preschool pot holders that parents dutifully use until they fall apart in the washing machine. After the first 20 minutes the older kids were begging someone, anyone, to take over their streamers so they could head for the juice and cookies. So much for the “coming together of male and female energies,” as Pagan Eric Brenner had put it just moments before. Still, the event did acknowl edge the Pagan holy day of Beltane, with the vestigial cere mony honoring the fecund sea son. And at least it brought some community together, which is more than could be said for the Video arcade in the mall. Most significantly, the Maypole event acknowledged the small but growing subset of church-goers who unite under the banner, Covenant of Unitarian Universalist Pagans, or CUUPS. Before the Maypole affair, Rev. Gary Kowalski had deliv ered an articulate and humor ous sermon on Paganism, emphasizing its warm and fuzzy qualities — earth-cen tered, reverent toward all living things, fun-loving — so much that it seemed an entreaty designed to put the congrega tion at ease. “Let us overcome our fear of Pagans,” he said, “and accept them as part of our

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organization.” In between the BUUC, or Burlington lines, perhaps: Yeah, some o f Unitarian Universalist Circle, these people are witches, but which is a proto-chapter of they’re good witches. CUUPS — especially to those The cautionary note may who might have feared blood not have been necessary. While letting or howling would be some Unitarians might raise an involved. The purpose of eyebrow, if not hackles, at preBUUC, explains the group’s Christian spirituality, the UU Web site, is “to provide a safe hymnal itself already includes place for Green Mountain readings from the Pagan teacher Pagans, a place for a spiritual and author Starhawk. The one community and regular Pagan Kowalski selected for last practice.” Sunday’s service, from And just what does that Dreaming the Dark, acknowl practice look like? Depends a bit edges that rituals — the glue of on whom you asked. I asked Pagan gatherings — create a Burlington’s High Priestess, the group bond. “Let my worship Rev. Dian Firebearer Mueller, be in the heart that rejoices, for but even she, with 15 years of behold — all acts of love and Paganism under her belted pleasure are my rituals,” “garb,” was equivocal. Her tradi Starhawk wrote. Sounds pretty tion is Wiccan, but within this good to me. there are different “denomina Paganism is non-authoritari tions,” she explained, adding an and based on natural cycles, that hers didn’t really have a Kowalski explained. And as name when she was apprentic writer Margot Adler has noted, ing. “I was taught shamanic most Pagans share the belief practices. One basic text was that the world, nature, the Starhawk’s Spiral Dance,” body, sexuality, the mind, the Mueller said — call it the imagination, and you are holy. “Shamanic Neo-Faery tradition.” Chances are the congregations Witches are Pagan, but not response to this explication was all Pagans are witches, Mueller typically indulgent, but as they further explained. Some Pagans spilled outside behind a gaggle believe in the gods and goddess of singing children, any misgiv es of the old religion, others do ings appeared to melt away in not. Some believe “God” is in the sunshine. Indeed, what per everything, and that nature, son who has endured a rather than scriptures, hold the Vermont winter might not feel most sacred lessons. Celtic, just a teensy bit Pagan out of Germanic and Scandinavian sheer gratitude for a perfect Pagans offer up variations on spring day? the theme. There could not have been a And contrary to one popu better introduction, in short, to lar myth, Satanism has abso

might not feel just a teensy bi Pagan out of sheer gratitude for a perfe c t " spring day? lutely no part in this. In fact, Paganism has no concept of Devil — we have Christianity to thank for that. Paganism is, in essence, non-creedal, and that’s why it has found a home within the UU Society, which posits that all beliefs can co-exist under one protective umbrella. W hat Pagans of all stripes share is what Kowalski called an “earthy spirituality,” that is, a reverence for Mother Earth and a fondness for rituals that honor cyclical natural phenom ena. Hence BUUC holds Full Moon Rituals and potluck din ners — the closest Sunday to the full moon each month. “At the circle meetings,” said Mueller, “the most common component is guided medita tion, plus healing. Before that, there is sharing” — people talk about what’s on their mind, basically. Twelve steps, anyone? “Healing” in this case means focusing energy on individuals in need of restoration of any

kind. This is also a bunch that considers magic not hexes and spells but “the ability to bring our dreams and visions into our everyday lives.” Pagans also celebrate eight sabbats, or holy days, marking the seasons of the sun. The big gies are Beltane and Samhain (pronounced sow-wain) — honoring life and death, respec tively, the latter corresponding to Hallowe’en. Acknowledging that some Pagans are “afraid to come out of the broom closet,” Mueller quipped, BUUC has borrowed a page from the gay communi ty: This September the group will host its Second Annual Pagan Pride Day — a merry event featuring a parade, rituals, feasting and a food drive. In a recent issue of BUUC’s newsletter, the “Green Mountain Circle Works,” David Endora Edleson calls Paganism a “spirituality for our whole selves.” He disses New Age philosophies as so much “spiri

tual Prozac,” which focus only on our pretty, lofty qualities — and which set believers up for failure the moment they feel like yelling at other motorists or smashing the china. “I want to propose that spir ituality, if it is to help us live authentically in this crazy, kooky, ravished world, must appeal not to our higher nature, but to our human nature,” Edleson wrote, “as it is, all o f it: the good, the bad and the ugly.” Paganism seems to fit the bill for Edleson, who is also a witch. As old as the hills, as reliable as the sun coming up in the East, a spirituality based on nature could hardly be more grounded. Literally. And if the rituals developed by an agrarian society feel awkward in an urban one — such as a ragtag Maypole dance for the kiddies — they still have the power to teach us that what goes arc md comes around. Again and again.®

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learned about Littleton while driving toward a cour thouse in Missouri, where a teenaged boy was to be tried for first-degree murder. Just one victim in this case; the stepgrandfather of his 15-year-old girlfriend. So not much publici ty. No Larry King. No Jerry Falwell. The kid was still 16 a year ago when he stole into the old mans tiny rural house late one night with a single-action shot gun, ripped the phone out of the wall, turned on all the lights, walked into the bedroom and woke the man up so he’d know who his executioner was. The girl may or may not have been at his side. After squeezing off one round at point-blank range, the boy was going through his victim’s bluejean pockets, looking for cash, when he heard the man “gurgling and snoring,” as he later told the police. So he reloaded and went back to the bed and fired again, aiming a little better this time. Through the three days of the trial, I kept my car radio on driving to and from the court house, and watched the TV coverage from Colorado at night in my motel room. Like most Americans, I heard many “solutions” to the “problem” of “this kind of thing.” O n one of the call-in shows from the St. Louis area, the host “personali ty” was obsessed about school uniforms. O n normal days the personality was a kind of wiseass. If these kids in Littleton had been forced to wear uniforms, the personality kept telling his listeners, this kind of thing would never have happened. Because then a clique would not have formed around those black trenchcoats, you see. I thought of my guy enter ing that bedroom in a white shirt and tie. W hich was actual ly what he wore in the court room. It made him look like a very wholesome young boy applying for a summer intern ship in a brokerage firm. O n television, a host of one o f those marathon cable all analysis shows, a big, goodlooking youngblood with a brush-cut, was harping on the “flawed reasoning” that tighter gun restrictions would cut

down on “this kind of thing.” Victims need guns to shoot back at the bad guys, was the consensus of the pro-gun explainers. Some said that if those kids at Columbine had only been arm ed... The boy was insensitive enough not to allow the farmer an opportunity to go for his gun. That particular gun was in his pickup truck outside the house. The young couple pawned it in Indiana en route to Ohio. They’d thrown the murder weapon — purchased at a big-box store at the local mall — from the pickup into the Mississippi River on the far side of the Mark Twain Bridge. Counseling and interven tion, that was another big theme on the radio and TV. Where were the counselors, the on-location reporters in their parkas kept demanding of the Columbine principal and the superintendent. Why couldn’t you have seen this sort of thing coming? Where was the inter vention, dammit? There’s an interesting thing about the small town where this Missouri boy grew up: It’s a kind of counseling-and-intervention theme park. The local Yellow Pages blossom with agencies, departments, divi sions, fieldworkers, caseworkers, therapists and counselors of all kinds: more therapeutic agen cies now than there were corner drugstores when I was growing up there in the 1950s. By coincidence, this town at the time of the shooting was the subject of a “social health” study by a field team from an institute out of Atlanta. The institute, with theoretical ties to the Centers for Disease Con trol, was looking into small heartland communities to determine the strength and resiliency of the “social capital” there. The working assumption is that chronic social break down — drug addiction, teenaged pregnancies, Violence — has replaced infectious dis eases as a priority for publichealth intervention. Nor is this particular town an aberration in that regard. It is the therapeutic universe in a grain of sand. Get on the Web and key in something like “child behavior” or “adoles cents,” and be amazed at the vast unscrolling of such agen-

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soulless killer’s stare, but for the opposite reason: He was too real. Too human. Too convinc ing in the way he furrowed his brow at the lawyers’ questions

rThrough the three days o f ^ l i i s trial, I watched h in r“^ B plrnost continuously. He wasl Iterrifying — not because of I [some glassy-eyed, soulless \ [k ille r’s stare, but for the ■ Ippposite reason: He was too] [real. Too human. | Cross stations on a battlefield. and looked them in the eye as Their collective mission, sim he answered. plified, is to teach parents how Oh, yes, there was another to be parents, children how to cluster of explanations for “this be children. That in itself sort of thing”: the media, TV, might be seen as a symptom computer games. The media that “this sort of thing” has has become a model for violent, taken on dimensions that over lethal behavior among our whelm partial solutions or pet young. theories. I kept my eyes on the Prayer. Get God back in the Missouri boy, especially during schools. Get the Ten recesses, when the courtroom Commandments back up on was nearly empty. Just him, a the blackboard. That was couple of bailiffs, and me in the another solution given plenty of spectators’ section, pretending airing after Littleton. to go over my notes. I remem While the jury was deliber ber one recess in particular, ating the boy’s verdict in have dreamed of it since return Missouri, his stepfather and I ing home. The boy had tired of drove to a nearby public library chatting up the bailiffs with his and talked about the boy’s life newfound “insider” aplomb. I — a life that amounts to a cata watched him as he stuck his logue of things that can go hands in his pockets and wrong with a child in America: strolled across the courtroom. family breakdown, absent par W hen he reached the windows, ents and guardians, a sterile, he took a hand from his pock vacant local community, drugs et, parted the Venetian blinds everywhere. The stepfather list and peered outside into the ed all the things he’d tried to do sunlight. to curb the boy’s anger and And then he murmured draw him out of his private something, dreamily, under his fantasies. One remedy had been breath. I’m pretty sure I’m the to remove the boy from his only other person who heard it: public grade school and place “It’s a beautiful day in the him in a private, religious insti neighborhood.” tution. Plenty of prayer, plenty It is not the guns. It is not of God, plenty of command-' the drugs. It is not the cults. It ments. After a year the religious is not the rich suburbs nor the institution handed him back. decayed towns and inner cities. The boy was convicted of It is not “Doom” and “Matrix.” first-degree murder and sen It is not the breakdown of fam tenced to life in prison without ily and religion and communi possibility of parole. Through ty. It is all these things. It is the three days of his trial, I everything. Childhood is the watched him almost continu body in the American morgue. ously. He was terrifying — not A casualty of our time. We all because of some glassy-eyed, did it. ®

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SEVEN DAYS

page 17

ByErik Esckilsen is baggy trousers, wob bly gait, derby, cane and black mustache give him away at a glance. Its Charlie Chaplins “Little Tramp” — the mischievous silent-screen star and perhaps most enduring character in movie history. Come to find out, though, we’ve only been getting half the story about Chaplin. According to Rick Benjamin, founding conductor of the Paragon Ragtime Orchestra, that plinkety piano sound that viewers have long associated with Chaplin’s films is all wrong. So he and his 12member orchestra will settle the score — literally — at the upcoming Charlie Chaplin Film Festival. They’ll perform the music intended to accom pany Chaplin’s The Adventurer, The Rink and The Immigrant while the films are screened. As Benjamin explains, the simple piano accompaniments of cinema’s earliest days, when films were often screened in storefront nickelodeons, had yielded to standardized scores for 12-piece orchestras by the time the films in the Chaplin festival were released — 191617. He attributes moviegoers’ equating the words “silent film” with that primitive piano sound to the fact that “Most of the

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people interested in silent film aren’t interested in the music. They’re interested in print qual ity, blah, blah, blah, and that’s all great.” But such treatment, he adds, overlooks the basic function of a musical score to prepare people emotionally for what they’re about to see. And few people have had the exposure to the music of the silent-film era that Benjamin has — in a career with Chaplin-esque overtones. While a student at Juilliard in 1985, Benjamin, then a tuba player, suffered a broken jaw during a wisdom-tooth extrac tion. The accident left him unable to play his instrument — and with a lot of time on his hands. He turned his attention to a writing project on trom bonist Arthur Pryor, a John Philip Sousa band member and pioneering conductor of Victor Talking Machine recordings around the turn of the century. In the course of his research, Benjamin discovered some 4000 music manuscripts in a New Jersey warehouse. Among those compositions were previ ously unknown works by Sousa, ragtime legend Scott Joplin and blues forefather W.C. Handy. Though Benjamin’s find was major in music-historical terms, Juilliard administrators were unimpressed — and cold to the

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idea of showcasing the work in a performance. As Benjamin recalls, one dean “got red in the face, huffed and puffed and said, ‘This is not what we do here, were serious, we do Beethoven, and forget it.”’ Benjamin assembled an orches tra anyway, and held a concert under the pretense o f a “tuba recital.” While the ragtime rebellion earned him a stern rebuke from Juilliard, it also drew a phone call from Grammy-winning classicalmusic producer Thomas Frost. Frost offered to produce what would become the Paragon Ragtime Orchestras debut album, 1985s On the Boardwalk. Benjamin dropped out of school and, by 1987, had formed a touring company. Four albums and 12 years later, he and PRO are still going strong. Part o f Paragon’s strength derives from their niche status as “vintage music” experts, a resource for people interested in early 20th-century American musical culture. At any given time, the orchestra has several programs in play: the Chaplin festival, a similar show honor ing Buster Keaton, a Joplin tribute and an early-blues evening. The group recently contributed to the Paul Taylor dance troupe’s history-minded piece Oh, You Kid.

The orchestra’s treasurehunting has also continued. In 1992, administrators at the Capitol Theater in Washington, D.C., offered Benjamin 26 trunks of manuscripts in exchange for a meaningful pro duction that made use of them. Among those works were the scores that would become the current Chaplin production. According to Benjamin, what makes the festival unique is its attention to historical detail. He calls it “an exact re creation down to my shoes.” The musical instruments are antique, including a 1910 Ludwig drum kit, and the orchestra performs in period costume. Also in keeping with a night out in the Titanic era, a musical overture opens the show, music plays between reels, and moviegoers exit to their own lush score. Pulling off an early-century show at the century’s opposite end requires great concentra tion, Benjamin says, owing to the modern audiences’ appetite for tight, digitally engineered scores. His appreciation for Chaplin’s artistry has grown in the process. “There is so much texture in the films that each time we do it, I see something else that he’s doing, either with his hands or his face,” Benjamin says. “W hat that is is a deep mystery.”

The films in the festival were produced during Chaplins Mutual Films period — a con tract that brought him a stag gering $670,000 and inspired him to muse, “I am left free to be just as funny as I dare.” Benjamin and film historians, such as archivist emeritus Sam Gill of the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences, con cur that the “Mutual” period catches the Little Tramp at his funniest, just before he took a turn for the sentimental. In The Adventurer, Chaplin plays an escaped convict who rescues a drowning woman, whereupon he’s mistaken for a wealthy yachtsman and taken home to meet the folks. In the “balletic slapstick comedy” The Rink, he’s a roller-skating aristo crat impostor battling bullies on his way to getting the girl. And The Immigrant finds him weathering the stormy seas en route to America, only to be separated from the girl of his dreams, reunited with her in a cafe and harassed by a maniacal waiter. Gill has called these films “the truest work of the screen’s most sublime artist.” But won’t people miss the plinkety piano? Benjamin doubts it. “When you do the real thing, it’s the real thing,” he says. “People sort of instinc tively know. It’s better.” ®

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SEVEN DAYS

page 19

sOUnd AdviCe where to go

B L IS S E D OUT Burlington's original riot grrls M iss Bliss rocked this town with their accordion-flavored rock 'n' roll in the '80s. This Friday the original all-gal group picks up where they left off — and picks up a few bottles of eponymous Magic Hat brew, too. Nato and Diane Horstmyer (MB songwriter) warm-up the reunion show at Red Square.

ROAD R A V E

You might have

seen James Keelaghan opening for Cry Cry Cry — the Canadian singer-songwriter penned one of the tunes recorded by that folk supergroup, who invited him on part of their recent tour. But Keelaghan easily carries the show by his own self, and reg ularly does so throughout the U.S., Europe and Australia — no wonder his latest CD is called simply

Road. This Sunday at the

Burlington Coffeehouse, find out why this Juno Award winner keeps getting invited back.

A lle y -C a ts , 4 1 K in g S t . , Burl., 6 6 0 - 4 3 0 4 . B a c k s t a g e P u b , 6 0 P e a rl St., E s s e x Jet., 8 7 8 - 5 4 9 4 . B illy B o b 's , K e ith Ave., B arre , 4 7 9 - 5 6 6 4 . B o o n y ’s, Rt. 2 3 6 , F ra n k lin , 9 3 3 - 4 5 6 9 . B o rd e r s B o o k s & M u s ic , 2 9 C h u r c h St., B u rlin g to n , 8 6 5 - 2 7 1 1 . B o ttle n e c k , 1 5 6 St. P a u l St., B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 3 9 9 4 . B rid g e S t C afe , R ic h m o n d , 4 3 4 - 2 2 3 3 . B u r lin g to n C o ffe e h o u s e at R h o m b u s , 1 8 6 C o lle g e St., B u rlin g to n , 8 6 4 - 5 8 8 8 . C a c t u s C afe , 1 L a w s o n Ln , B url., 8 6 2 - 6 9 0 0 . C a fe O le, N o rth C o m m o n , C h e ls e a , 6 8 5 - 2 1 7 3 . T h e C a g e . B o lt o n R d , W a te rb u ry. 2 4 4 - 5 4 5 7 . C a m b r id g e C o ffe e H o u s e , S m u g g le r s N o tc h Inn, J e ffe rs o n v ille , 6 4 4 - 2 2 3 3 . C h a m p io n s , 3 2 M a in St., W in o o s k i, 6 5 5 - 4 7 0 5 . C h a r lie O s, 7 0 M a in St., M o n tp e lie r, 2 2 3 - 6 8 2 0 . C h ic k e n B o n e 4 3 K in g St.. B u rlin g to n , 8 6 4 - 9 6 7 4 . C h o w ' B e lla , 2 8 N. M a i n St.. St A lb a n s , 5 2 4 - 1 4 0 5 . C lu b E xtre m e, 1 6 5 C h u r c h St., B u rlin g to n , 6 6 0 - 2 0 8 8 . C lu b M e t ro n o m e , 1 8 8 M a in S t . , B u r lin g to n , 8 6 5 - 4 5 6 3 . C o b b w e b , S a n d y b ir c h Rd., G e o rg ia , 5 2 7 - 7 0 0 0 . D a n n y 's P u b , K e ith A ve., B a rre , 4 7 9 - 5 6 6 4 D e e r le a p B o o k s , 2 5 M a i n St., B risto l, 4 5 3 - 5 6 8 4 . D ia m o n d J im 's G rille , H ig h g a t e C o m m . S h p g . Ctr., St. A lb a n s , 5 2 4 - 9 2 8 0 . E d g e w a t e r P u b , 3 4 0 M a lle t t s B a y A ve., C o lc h e s t e r, 8 6 5 - 4 2 1 4 . E m e ra ld C ity N ig h tc lu b , 1 1 4 R iv e r St., M o n tp e lie r , 2 2 3 - 7 0 0 7 . F r a n n y O 's 7 3 3 Q u e e n C ity P k. R d . B u rlin g to n , 8 6 3 - 2 9 0 9 . G o o d T im e s C afe , H in e s b u r g V illa g e , Rt. 1 1 6 , 4 8 2 - 4 4 4 4 . G re atfu l B re a d . 6 5 P e a rl St.. E s s e x Jet., 8 7 8 - 4 4 6 6 . H a lv o r s o n s, 1 6 C h u r c h St., B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 0 2 7 8 . ^ H e n r y 's , H o lid a y Inn, 1 0 6 8 W illis t o n Rd., S. B u r lin g to n , 8 6 3 - 6 3 6 1 . H ig h e r G ro u n d . 1 M a in St., W in o o s k i, 6 5 4 - 8 8 8 8 . J a k e s, 1 2 3 3 S h e lb u r n e R d . S. B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 2 2 5 1 . J.P .'s P u b , 1 3 9 M a in St., B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 6 3 8 9 . L a B r io c h e , 8 9 M a i n St., M o n tp e lie r , 2 2 9 - 0 4 4 3 . L a st C h a n c e S a lo o n , 1 4 7 M a in , B u rlin g to n , 8 6 2 - 5 1 5 9 . L e u m g s, 1 1 5 C h u r c h St.. B u rlin g to n , 8 6 3 - 3 7 5 9 . L o c a l L e g e n d s C o ffe e h o u s e , D a ily B re a d C afe , R ic h m o n d , 4 3 4 - 3 1 4 8 . M a d M o u n t a in T ave rn, Rt. 1 0 0 , W a its fie ld , 4 9 6 - 2 5 6 2 . M a i n St. B a r & G rill, 1 1 8 M a i n St., M o n tp e lie r , 2 2 3 - 3 1 8 8 . ^ M a n h a t t a n P u b , 1 6 7 M a m St., B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 6 7 7 6 . M a tte rh o rn , M o u n t a in Rd., Sto w e , 2 5 3 - 8 1 9 8 . M o r g a n 's at C a p ito l P la z a , 1 0 0 M a m St., M o n tp e lie r , 2 2 3 - 5 2 5 2 . T h e M o u n t a in R o a d h o u s e , 1 6 7 7 M o u n t a in R d , Sto w e , 2 5 3 - 2 8 0 0 . N E C I C o m m o n s , 2 5 C h u r c h St., B u rlin g to n , 8 6 2 - 6 3 2 4 . N e c ta r 's , 1 8 8 M a m St., B u rlin g to n . 6 5 8 - 4 7 7 1 . N e s h o b c S p o r t s m a n C lu b , Rt. 7 3 , E a s t B ra n d o n , 2 4 7 - 9 5 7 8 . T h e N ig h ts p o t O u tb a c k , K illm g t o n Rd., K illin g to n , 4 2 2 - 9 8 8 5 1 3 5 P e a rl St., B u rlin g to n , 8 6 3 - 2 3 4 3 . R * d is s o n H ote l, 6 0 B a tte ry St., B u rlin g to n , 6 5 8 - 6 5 0 0 . R a s p u t in 's , 1 6 3 C h u r c h St., B u r lin g to n , 8 6 4 - 9 3 2 4 . R e d S q u a r e , 1 3 6 C h u r c h St., B u r lin g to n , 8 5 9 - 8 9 0 9 . R h o m b u s , 1 8 6 C o lle g e St., B u rlin g to n , 8 6 5 - 3 1 4 4 . R ip to n C o m m u n ity C o ffe e H o u s e , Rt. 1 2 5 , 3 8 8 - 9 7 8 2 . R i R a, 1 2 3 C h u r c h St., B u rlin g to n , 8 6 0 - 9 4 0 1 . R u b e n Ja m e s, 1 5 9 M a m St., B u r lin g to n , 8 6 4 - 0 7 4 4 . R u d e D o g. 1 4 G re e n St., V e r g c n n e s , 8 7 7 - 2 0 3 4 . R u s t y N a il, M o u n t a in Rd., S to w e , 2 5 3 - 6 2 4 5 . S a i- G o n C afe , 1 3 3 B a n k St., B u r lin g to n , 8 6 3 - 5 6 3 7 . T h e S t ra n d T h e a tre , 2 5 B rin k e r h o ff St., P la tts b u r g h , 5 1 8 - 5 6 3 - 3 9 4 6 . S w a n y s, 2 1 5 M a i n St., V e r g c n n e s , 8 7 7 - 3 6 6 7 . S w e e tw a t e rs , 1 1 8 C h u r c h St., B u r lin g to n , 8 6 4 - 9 8 0 0 . T h e T a v e rn at th e In n at E s s e x , E s s e x Jet., 8 7 8 - 1 1 0 0 . T h irs t y Turtle, 1 S. M a in St., W a te rb u ry , 2 4 4 - 5 2 2 3 . T h re e M o u n t a in L o d g e , Rt. 1 0 8 , J e ffe rs o n v ille , 6 4 4 - 5 7 3 6 . T o a d s to o l H a r ry 's , Rt. 4, K illin g to n , 4 2 2 - 5 0 1 9 . T r a c k s id e T ave rn, 1 8 M a lle t t s B a y A ve ., W in o o s k i, 6 5 5 - 9 5 4 2 . T u c k a w a y s, S h e ra to n , 8 7 0 W illis t o n Rd., S. B u r lin g to n , 8 6 5 - 6 6 0 0 . V e rm o n t P u b & B re w e ry , 1 4 4 C o lle g e , B u r lin g to n , 8 6 5 - 0 5 0 0 . V illa T ra g a ra , Rt. 1 0 0 , W a te rb u r y Ctr., 2 4 4 - 5 2 8 8 . W in d ja m m e r, 1 0 7 6 W illis t o n Rd., S. B u r lin g to n , 8 6 2 - 6 5 8 5 .

5 WEDNESDAY JENNI JOHNSON & FRIENDS

(jazz/blues), Leunigs, 7:30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, 135 Pearl, 9:30 p.m. NC. KALLIT MOLLY (rock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. JAMES HARVEY (jazz), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP DJ NIGHT, Rasputins, 9:30 p.m. NC. W RU V GRADUATING SEN IO RS PARTY (funk, jazz, soul, hip-

hop, reggae DJs), Bottleneck, 9 p.m. $2. OPEN M IK E W/PICKLE, Manhat tan Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. TABOO OPEN TABLE FREESTYLE DJ SPIN-OFF, Club Extreme, 9

p.m. NC. (Joey K. & Big J), Last Chance Saloon, 10:30 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP DJS

CACTUS CAFE CINCO DE MAYO REVUE BAND (Flamenco, Mex-

rock), Cactus Cafe, 8 p.m. NC. ACOUSTIC JAM W/HANNIBAL HILL (hard rock), Alley Cats, 6

p.m. NC.

KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. ACOUSTIC JAM W/HANNIBAL * HILL (hard rock), Alley Cats, 6

p.m. NC. THE SLIP, LIVING DAYLIGHTS

(jazz/groove), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $ 5 /7 . JIM PAGE (environmental singersongwriter), Good Times Cafe,

NEW RESCHEDULED DATE In a benefit for the Peace & Justice Center

S A T . 5 . 8 . 8 P M . $5

1HE HALOGENS RED1ELIPHONE j C n e

W h DISC G0 I C I S D Friday, M ay 28 at 8:00 pm Unitarian Universalist Church, Burlington

When your Stairw ay to Heaven^ becomes an | overplayed song frofli H ell,

A L L P R E V IO U SL Y PU R C H A SED T ICK ETS W IL L BE H O N O R E D AT THE D O O R. Tickets can still be pu rch ased at the Peace & Justice Center (8 6 3 -8 3 2 6 ), the Flynn Theatre Bo x Office, Pure P op Records, M id d le b u ry N atu ral Foods Coop, V erm o n t T rading C o m p a n y in M ontpelier, o r call 86 -F LY N N

W e lS f lie r e .

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Even for those lighter-w aving 70’s burnout anthema

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7:30 p.m. $2. TNT (DJ & karaoke), Thirsty

Turtle, 9 p.m. NC. HOUSE JAM (improv soul-funk), Emerald City, 9 p.m. $1/3. KARAOKE, Danny’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. LUCINDA W ILLIAMS, PATTY GRIFFIN (alt rcountry singer-song

writers), Dibden Center, Johnson State College, 8 p.m. $28.

(poetry night), Daily Bread Bakery, 7:30 p.m. $2.50. KARAOKE, Swany’s, 9 p.m. NC. DJ & KARAOKE, Thirsty Turtle, 9:30 p.m. NC. THE SLIP, PARTY BAND (jazzgroove, funk), Emerald City Nightclub, 9 p.m. $4/10. KARAOKE, Danny’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC.

anilo Perez combines the folkloric music of his native ith modern jazz and other musics of the African diaspora, them Cuban, Brazilian, Argentinean, Peruvian and i. His most recent recording, Central Avenue (Impulse!, Is

sficoispi flamenco,

Indian and Middle Eastern tradi-

3 s s -ililt i^ stew. Perez first gained international recognition with Dizzy Gillespie's United Nation Orchestra, per forming with the multinational group for four years, and recording the critically acclaimed Live at the Royal Festival H all (Enja, 1989). Before Central Avenue, Perez released three albums as a

FRIDAY

THURSDAY ELLEN POWELL & GUEST (jazz),

Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. RODNEY (acoustic rock), Sweetwaters, 8:30 p.m. NC. SANDRA W RIGHT (blues diva), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. THE CHAMELEONS

(Latin/jazz/r&b), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. BELIZBEHA, INVISIBLE JET (acid funk, alt-rock), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $7. ORGANIC GROOVE FARMERS

(backporch folkgrass), Manhattan Pub, 10 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT, Club Extreme, 8 p.m. NC. KARAOKE NIGHT, Rasputins, 9:30 p.m. NC. SOLOMONIC SOUND S Y ST E M

(reggae DJ), J.P’s Pub, 10 p.m. NC. OPEN M IK E W/D. DAVIS, Cactus Cafe, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE FOX (blues), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. DR. JAZZ & THE DIXIE HOT SHOTS (Dixieland jazz), Higher

Ground, 7 p.m. $3/5, followed by THE INTERACTIVE ART & M U SIC DEMONSTRATION (origi nal electronic music and art work), 10 p.m. $6. LEAVITT & DELBACK

(rock/r&b), Trackside Tavern, 8 p.m. NC. GUY C0LASACC0 (singer-song writer), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE, Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m.

NC. PAUL GAGNON, OPEN READING

weekly

listin

leader: his self-titled debut (Novus, 1993); The Journey (Novus,

PICTURE THIS (jazz), Windjam

1994); and PanaM onk (Impulse!, 1996). His style is an elegant, joy

mer, 5 p.m. NC.

ful and melodic amalgam of diverse influences, ranging from the

BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish),

elliptical audacity of Thelonious Monk to the traditional mejora-

Last Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. GOTTFRIED & YOUNG (acoustic duo), Borders, 8 p.m. NC. ERIC BRENNER (acoustic), 135 Pearl, 6 p.m., NC, followed by EVOLUTION (DJ Craig Mitchell), 10 p.m. $5. ADAM ROSENBERG (acoustic rock), Sweetwaters, 9 p.m. NC. I'M BIG AND I CAN DIG (jazz), M anhattan Pub, 10 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT (hip-hop), Ruben James, 10 p.m. NC. M IS S BLISS, NATO, DIANE H0RSTM YER (orig. rock,

reunion show; singer-songwrit ers), Red Square, 8 p.m. NC. SEVEN DAYS SPRING SW ING FLING W /BL00Z0T0MY (singles

party; swing dance lessons at 8 p.m., $8), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. $10. MIDLIFE CHRYSLER (vintage rock), Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC. '80 S NIGHT (DJ Psychotrope), Club Extreme, 9 p.m. NC. DIXIE 6 (New Orleans jazz), Ver mont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC. DJ NIGHT (Butch, Dubee, BWyse; hip-hop, r&b, dancehall), Chicken Bone Cafe, 10 p.m. $2. COMEDY ZONE (stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $8. EMPTY POCKETS (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. RICHIE WARD & FAT BOY (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. KATE BARCLAY, KATHERINE

ma, a style from the interior of Panama. Perez can swing hard in both straight-ahead modern jazz rhythms and complex Afro-Cuban structures, and then turn around and caress a ballad with the languid authority of Bill Evans. Perez has said: "Someone once told me that when I played the music cured him of his sadness. It was the highest of compliments. I feel that musicians are like doctors; they can lift your spirit." Assisting in the proce dure at the Flynn will be bassist John Benitez and drummer Antonio Sanchez. The Joe Davidian-Ellen Powell Trio open. —

B ill Barton

QUINN, JEH KULU & GUESTS

Plaza, 7:30 p.m. NC.

(singer-songwriter; CD release party), Higher Ground, 8:30 p.m. $5. B0X0 BLAIR (rock), Champion’s, 9 p.m. NC. BLUE VOODOO (blues/rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. JOHN CASSEL (jazz piano), Tavern, Inn at Essex, 7 p.m. NC. DANCIN' DEAN (country, line dancing), Cobbwebb, 7:30 p.m. $5. LIVE JAZZ, Diamond Jim’s Grille, 7:30 p.m. NC. TANTRUM (rock), Franny O ’s, 9 p.m. NC. SAND BLIZZARD (classic & altrock), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $3.

Nectars, 9:30 p.m. NC.

STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS (hill

FACT0RIA (DJ Little Martin),

billy boogie), Charlie O ’s, 9 p.m. NC.

STARLINE RHYTHM BOYS (hill

MONIKA HEIDEMANN & SETH EAM ES (jazz-blues), Villa

Tragara, 6:30 p.m. $7.50. AYE (vocal duo), Emerald City Nightclub, 9 p.m. $5/10.

BLUE FOX & ROCKIN' DADDYS

(blues-rock), Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. NC. TIN PAN ALLEY (rock/blues), Nightspot Outback, 9 p.m. NC.

135 Pearl, 10 p.m. $4/5. billy boogie), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. CONSTRUCTION JOE (alt-rock), Club Metronome, 7 p.m. $4, followed by RETR0N0ME (disco), 10 p.m. NC. JOEY LEONE & CHOP SHOP

8 SATURDAY

(blues-rock), R1 R£, 10 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP NIGHT (DJs), Club

THE HALOGENS, RED TELEPHONE (alt rock), 242 Main,

8 p.m. NC. BOOTLESS & UNHORSED (Irish),

Last Chance Saloon, 7:30 p.m. NC. JERALD HARSCHER (singer-

songwriter), Burlington Coffee house at Rhombus, 8 p.m. $6. SEN SIBLE SHOES (rock/r&b),

Extreme, 9 p.m. NC. KARAOKE, J.P.’s Pub, 9 p.m. NC. FLASHBACK (’70s-’80s DJ), Rasputins, 9:30 p.m. NC. HIP-HOP NIGHT (DJ), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. KIP M EAKER (blues), Vermont Pub & Brewery, 9:30 p.m. NC.

continued on page 23

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K E Y S (Up Yours Records, CD) —

GRAHAM PARKER

THIS SUNDAY!

DEEP IN THE HEART OF...WINOOSKI In the mood for a lit

tle bit o f N ’Awlins, without the heat? Then shuffle off to Higher Ground this Thursday, for the first of a monthly series of Dixieland jazz at the Onion City nightspot, cour tesy of the Green M ountain Dixieland Jazz Society. This weeks prescriptive: Dr. JdZZ & th© Dixi© Hot Shots (pic tured). Oh, and the only smoke will be onstage.

LU CO

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D O CTO RJA ZZ & THE D IX IE HOTSHOTS

APOCALYPSO Never one to lay idle, since recovering from his beating and broken leg last winter, Dave Jarvis has been

THURSDAY, MAY 6 $6 AT DOOR LATE SHOW 10 PM! BILLY MOSCHELLA & ATHENWOOD RECORDS PRESENTS

INTERACTIVE ART & MUSIC DEMONSTRATION

a busy boy. First, he’s working on a full-length CD with Stowe’s Tundra Records Group, and reports that Vermont filmmaker David GianCOla is licensing Jarvis’ song “Sunflower Street” for his upcoming film Icebreaker. But the most intriguing project is David L. Jarvis: The Vietnam Tapes 1967-68, an electronica-oriented recording utilizing sequences of audiotapes from Dave’s dad to Dave’s mom prior to his death in Vietnam in 1968. Jarvis plans to har ness a platoon of local talent for this full-metal project, due sometime in July.

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SELF SERVICE Burlington’s Irish Pub Ri Ra rolls out the welcome mat to fellow service industry folks — meaning people in the bar, restaurant and hotel biz — with a private party this Monday, featuring a free buffet and music from Love Bomb. But the “Bartenders’ Ball” will become a regu lar Monday-night feature open to the public after that if you’re a server, have an ID and Mondays off, hoist a pint with the new lads on the block.

T O M FR E U N D TUESDAY. MAY 11 S20 ADVANCE S20 DAY OF SHOW FLEX RECORDS & 104 7 THE POINT W ELCOM ES • T O iST CONCERTS PRESENTS

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DO GOOD DEPT. It’s May, and what are graduating seniors to do but...party? W RUV deejays are no exception, except their wing-ding at Bottleneck this Wednesday — which just happens to coincide with Cinco de Mayo, gringo-style — is also a benefit for the student station of the University of Vermont. Alma radio, or something like that. Expect the best funk, jazz, soul, hip-hop, reggae and dancehall grooves from all-star spinners LJ, Joe L. Benge, Huli, MelO and El V. But save some moxie for Saturday’s Kosovo Refugee Benefit at the Old Lantern in Charlotte, where The Nobby

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SINGLE TRACKS . . . That gun-control song I gave so much ink to last week earned Cheryl Wheeler a slot in an antiNRA demonstration in Denver (take that, Charlton Heston)

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this past week — but unfortunately the singer-songwriter had to postpone her Burlington concert to do so. She’ll be back May 28 . . . BloOZOtOmy took first place, out of 13 acts, in the first annual Party Expo talent contest at the Champlain Valley Fairgrounds a couple weeks back . . . Look for a new DysFunkShun EP soon, titled Notes From the Underground (hmmm, sounds familiar), and a full-length CD debut from Chainsaws and Children called .daca. . . New Hampshire’s Motorplant was named “Artist of the Year” for 1998 by JA M Music Magazines Reader’s Poll . . . O n the air this week: Vermont Public Radio airs “Live From Higher Ground” this Wednesday, featuring Seattle’s Living Daylights, which host Neal Charnoff calls “sort o f Charlie Hunter meets John Zorn;” Sunday night on Buzz “Homebrew” (99.9 FM) Nicole Saltus celebrates the show’s first anniversary with a look back at local recorded music . . . (Z)

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page 22

. SEVEN DAYS

GRAHAM PARKER, LO O SE M O N

Band name of the week: The Splinter Group

, may 5,1999

British rocker Graham Parkers new Internet-only release, Loose Monkeys: Spare Tracks and Lost Demos, is a col lection of gems, rough and polished, recently swept from his personal vaults. Tracks date from the glossy, overblown “Wherever You Are,” an out-take from ’83’s The Real McCaw that should’ve stayed taken out, to “Guillotine of Guadeloupe,” a somewhat heavy-handed anti-colonial rocker recorded in ’96 for Acid Bubblegum. But the meat of this record are 11 demos from ’85 and 88, including songs as good as any Parker has ever written. These tracks feature him and an acoustic guitar with limited electric guitar and vocal overdubs. They sound stripped-down, but-somehow complete even if you can’t help wondering how fully fleshed out versions might sound. The caffeinated reggae of the anti-apartheid “Durban Poison” is the best of the opening trio of songs, recorded in 1986 with a full band, including fellow Rumour-er Brinsley Schwartz on guitar. There’s really something here for fans of any facet of Parkers music — “Get Started, Start a Fire fans might love the afore-dissed “Wherever You Are,” for instance. I loved the acerbic acoustic pop of songs like Dead to the World and “Everything Goes,” chock-full of melody and poetry, and the soulful “Still Got My Faith,” where Parker adds some bass to the ringing acoustic and twangy electric guitars. I m not exactly stuck for words,” he sings on the optimistic I m in Love with You” — ain’t that the truth. Parker is a prolific, inventive song writer — who else could get away with rhyming “aroma” and “coma” (“The Invisible Woman”)? He shifts easily from straight ahead love songs like “Natalie” to topical tracks like his acoustic indictment of “corporate rock. Loose Monkeys is a bit uneven, as most such compilations are, and Parker can be prone to the overextended metaphor, but it contains more than enough nuggets to make it a must for any G.P. fan. (Available at: www.razorandtie.com.) Check out the live thing when Parker rolls into Higher Ground this Sunday. Singer-songwriter Tom Freund opens. — Paul Gibson NATO, ROOM FUL OF FA N S (Mighty Winooski Music, CD) —

Burlington singer-songwriter Nato (aka Nate Orshan) was first spotted perfecting his pogo behind the keyboard of his high CO school band — The Lawyers won the 1984 Burlington Battle of the Bands. After stints with ’80s bands The Cuts and The Switch, Nato began developing his own idiosyncratic thing and hitting the open mikes. His job as a bassist with Dave Keller Blues Band this decade only served to develop multi-instrumental — and per formance — chops. Nato’s second solo album, Roomjul o f Fans, is a culmination of many efforts, some of them not self-evident: He CO wrote and performed all the songs, produced the tracks (recorded and mastered, with engineer Matt McCarthy, entirely on a PC), did the graphics and typesetting on the C D ’s 16-page booklet LU (the art depicts a bunch of fans — the air-cooling kind), and even formed his own mini-label and got his own bar code. Talk about DIY. But all that work would be in vain if the songs sucked. I’m happy to report that Roomful o f Fans, while uneven, doesn’t suck. CO Not even close. Nato’s growth as a songwriter is what shows up clearly here; his penchant for pop echoes that of Matthew Sweet, without the rock bombast, Michael Penn, with more inventive LU instrumentation (I really like the churchy organ on Run Away, fer instance), and the witty Elvis Costello, whom I suspect is a Nato hero. Melodicism here is abetted by mostly thoughtful, per sonal lyrics and no small dose CO of humor. For the latter, check out the mambo-ish “BomBom,” a ditty about mom lighting up for the first time — and we’re not talking Virginia Slims. Nato possesses an unre LU markable but elastic voice, kwhich he uses with unabashed CO expressiveness. Though he apparently prefers vocals au LU naturel, I think some well-placed effects could have helped on songs like the heartbreaker “Monkey,” or the plodding morality tale “Putting Peace to an End” — as they do on From the Noise,” a tune that shifts from dark to light and back to dark, and is one of the most promising here. Nato is at his most singer</> songwriterish with the overlong “Spies, a curious description of an enigmatic occupation that inexplicably flops into a three-quar LU ter time bridge near the end. The catchy “Luiza bursts into a ska beat on the chorus, while “Over My Shoulder” is a funk-lite bit of toe-tapping syncopation. Roomful o f Fans is a sonic pleasure, with discovery in the details on nearly every songs. O n the other hand, it combines almost too many influences, resulting in a col CO lection that could be considered impressively diverse, or a mish mash. The good news is it suggests Nato will never run out of and as his vision — and recording techniques — continue LU ideas, to mature, his roomful of fans might expect Beck-like sophistica tion to follow. Check out the pared-down version when Nato LU opens for Miss Bliss this Friday at Red Square. — Pamela Polston ©

sOUnd AdviCe continued from page 21

RO O TS R U L E R S If Toots Hibbert isn't Jamaica's

Prom.

main man, I don't know who is. With his band The Maytals, the singer has more than 35 years in the music biz, and that's a lot of experience fueling his incomparable concerts. And only Toots could get away with making a ska cover of The Kinks' "You Really Got M e " — which appears on his Grammynominated S k a Father. Morgan

jars @handmade clothing @beads

Heritage — the offspring of reggae legend Denroy Morgan — offer up rootsy riddims in

T H R E A D S i

front of Toots & the Maytals at Higher Ground this Tuesday.

(stand-up), Radisson Hotel, 8 & 10 p.m. $8. GUY COLASACCO (singersongwriter), Jake’s, 6:30 p.m. NC. COMEDY ZONE

KOSOVO REFUGEE BENEFIT W /N0BBY REED PROJECT, THE NATURALS (blues, pop-

rock), Old Lantern, Charlotte, 8 p.m. $10. EMPTY POCKETS (rock), Henry’s Pub, Holiday Inn, 9 p.m. NC. HIGHLAND W EAVERS (Irish), Tuckaway’s, Sheraton Hotel, 9 p.m. NC. RICHIE WARD & FAT BOY (rock), Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. $2. SETH YAC0V0NE, HELI COPTER CONSORTIUM (blues;

freak rock), Higher Ground, 9:30 p.m. $5. R U S S & Co. (rock), Champion’s, 9 p.m. NC. MR. FRENCH (rock), Backstage Pub, 8:30 p.m. $2. BLUE VOODOO (blues/rock), Edgewater Pub, 9 p.m. NC. PICTURE TH IS (jazz duo), Tav ern, Inn at Essex, 7 p.m. NC.

GRAHAM PARKER, TOM FRE UND (legendary rock singer-

songwriter), Higher Ground, 8 p.m. $10/12. KARAOKE W/MATT & BONNIE DRAKE, Edgewater Pub, 7

p.m. NC. PATTI CASEY (folk diva), La Brioche, 11 a.m. NC. LIVE M U SIC (acoustic), Main Street Bar & Grill, 11 a.m. NC.

VT DEPT. OF HEALTH B EH A V IO R S U R V E Y

BLACKLIGHT AFTER MIDNIGHT

(DJ), Swany’s, 9 p.m. NC. EDGE OF SUNDOW N

(Southern rock), Thirsty Turtle, 9 p.m. $3. NETWORK, THE H U M M IN G

(jazz-funk), Emerald City, 9 p.m. $6/10. BLUES BUSTERS, Mountain Roadhouse, 9 p.m. NC. TIN PAN ALLEY (rock/blues), Nightspot Outback, 9 p.m. NC.

SUNDAY (jazz-blues), Sweetwaters, 11:30 a.m. NC. JAMES KEELAGHAN (singersongwriter), Burlington Coffeehouse, 7 p.m. $8. JENNI JOHNSON

HIP-HOP DJ NIGHT,

Rasputin’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. BL00Z0T0M Y (jump blues), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. SUNDAY M A S S W/DJ AQUA B. (turntablism), Club

Metronome, 10 p.m. NC. (cover rock), R1 Rl, 10 p.m. NC. R U SS & CO. (rock), Chicken Bone, 10 p.m. NC. COURT OF LOVE

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p.m. NC. BL00Z0T0M Y (jump blues), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. DAVE GRIPP0 (funk), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. SW IN G DANCE (beginner and intermediate lessons w/Terry Bouricius), Club Metronome, 7 & 8:30 p.m. $8. BORDER II (all-ages w/DJ Derrick Brown), Club Extreme, 9 p. m. $3.

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O P Z IO N

TUESDAY (acoustic), Bur lington Coffeehouse at Rhom bus, 8 p.m. $3-6. BOB GAGNON (jazz), Leunig’s, 7:30 p.m. NC. MARTIN & MITCHELL (soul DJs), Club Metronome, 9 p.m. NC. CONSTRUCTION JOE (altcountry), Red Square, 9:30 p.m. NC. 27 DOWN (rock), Nectar’s, 9:30 p.m. NC. OPEN MIKE, Rasputin’s, 10 p.m. NC. FUNKY JAZZ NIGHT, Last Chance Saloon, 9 p.m. NC. BA SH M EN T (reggae/dancehall DJ), Ruben James, 11 p.m. NC. R U S S & CO. (rock), J.R’s Pub, 9:30 p.m. NC. KARAOKE W/FRANK, Trackside Tavern, 9 p.m. NC. OPEN STAGE

TOOTS & THE MAYTALS, MORGAN HERITAGE (reggae

legends), Higher Ground, 9 p.m. $20. ACOUSTIC JAM, Neshobe Sportsman Club, 6 p.m. NC. KID S NIGHT OUT (all-ages no alcohol dance), Emerald City, 8 p.m. $7. KARAOKE, Danny’s Pub, 9 p.m. N C ©

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page 23

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book binding: Not only will you not he “shushed at rite Fletcher Free Library’s upcoming fundraiser, you may have to shout to he heard. Auctioneer Dick FIarhawav fields bids on artwork to fuel the new-book fund while jazz cats play music to mingle and munch on hors d ’oeuvres by. Block-hound items include paint ings, photography, glass work, historic photos of Church Street and sculpture by artists Jerry Greier and Ray Perry, whose human forms in fiberglass and clay have graced die library read* iitg room over the years. Thursday, May 6. Fletcher Tree Library, Burlington, 6:30 pan. Tree. Info, 865-7222. eating in-state:

presents

AT THE OPERA HOUSE

a n eve n u iq o f w arm e~> in eitn n j tra d itio n a l in note

Jay Ungar & M olly M ason SaturdayMay 15 8pm

Vermont’s population may only he 500,000 strong, but that adds up to 1.5 million daily decisions about what to eat — each of which impacts our bodies, econonnvand landscape. The Vermont Fresh Network of farmers and restaurateurs promoting the fruits of local labors hosts an upcoming conference on “The Future of Our Food. Among the panelists and guest speakers is Carlo Petrini, founder and president of the Italy-based “Slow Food” Movement. Hell put McDonalds in its place, and keep it there for all three courses. Triday, May 7. The Inn at Essex, 1:30 pan. Free. Info, 223-9274.

“Interactivity” has arrived in poet ry, but the effect is far from hightech. Down and dirty is more like ir. At the upcoming Burlington Poetry Slam — described by orga nizers as “a cross between a boxing match and a tent revival” — poets read before a jury of their peers. With audience participation encouraged, the Slam format adds a rough edge to the rarefied medi um. The Burlington Slam is host ed by local “agitator and dancer Shannon W illiams, herself a Dallas Slam finalist. Friday, May 7. Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., 9 p.m. $3-6. Info, 862-6536.

teen spirit!

In the wake of the Colorado tragedy, we ve heard from police, parents, child psychol ogists and even President Clinton. Now it’s time to hear from area kids. At an upcoming event to mark Youth Advocacy Month, teens speak out on such issues as school policies, skateboarding and alienation. I he day ends on an up note as four pint-sized deejays spin for an all-ages dance. Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered youth have their say---- and their own “Heroes and Villains’-themed prom — at Youth Pride events the following day. Friday, May 7. Speakout, Burlington City Hall steps, 4:306:30 pan. Dance, Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7-l 1 pan. Free. Info, 658-2701, extension 224. Saturday, May 8. Youth Pride Speakout, Burlington City Half 3-5 pan. Prom, Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7:30-11 pan. $5. Info, 865-9677.

by erik.

Vermont Youth Orchestra presents

Dvorak in America Troy Peters, conductor Evan Drachman, cello Sunday, May 16 3:00 p.m. Flynn Theatre

$10/Adults, $5/students & seniors For information call (802) 658-4708

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page 24

Media Sponsor

SEVEN DAYS

Generously sponsored by

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may 5,1999

Wednesday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” SMALL ENSEMBLE CONCERT: Student string quartets and wind nonets finish the semester on a strong note. UVM Recital Hall, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-3040. P IG T O W N FLING: The Celtic and bluegrass blenders fork out the folk tunes at this “Cambridge Coffee House” event. Smuggler’s Notch, Jeffersonville, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 644-2233. DIANA FANNING: The acclaimed pianist plays Chopin, Janacek, Debussy and Haydn at Stowe Comm unity Church, noon. Free. Info, 253-7792.

dance SQUARE DANCE: Al Monty calls for the annual “Trail-In” dance hosted by

the Central Vermont Squares. Montpelier Grange Hall, 7-10 p.m. $4. Info, 485-6739.

drama ‘SYLVIA’: Northern Stage mounts A.R. Gurney’s poignant comedy about an adopted per that comes between a hus band and wife. Briggs Opera House, W hite River Jet., 8 p.m. $20. Info, 296-7000.

‘COMBATIVE COUPLES’ DOUBLE FEATURE: Ingrid Bergman helps Cary Grant ferret out a Nazi in Alfred Hitchcock’s Notorious. In John Ford’s The Q uiet M an, John Wayne plays a boxer who returns to his native Ireland to woo a lass played by Maureen O ’Hara. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45 & 8:40 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

film

art

‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: Family secrets propel the plot in this Vermont-made feature reminiscent of Bridges o f Madison County. See “film list ings” for times. Hoyts Nickelodeon, Burlington. Info, 863-9515. ‘DRAWN FROM M EM ORY’: This documentary traces the troubled life and career o f Czech animatQr Paul Fierlinger. Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum of Art, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 7 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

• Also, see exhibit openings in the art listings. FIGURE DRAWING: The human fig ure motivates aspiring and accomplished artists in a weekly drawing session at the Firehouse Gallery, Burlington, 6:30-9:30 p.m. $3-6. Info, 865-7165.

words ‘FIC T IO N STRANGER TH A N T R U T H ’: Investigative journalist Gerard Colby reads from his unpub lished fiction at Rhombus Gallery, 186

, ^

Charlie Chaplin Film Festival with the Paragon Ragtime Orchestra

Friday, M a y 14 at 8 pm

"An evening c t abidingly energetic fun. (New york Times)

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T here’s alternative, and then there’s alter-Native. M usicianvisual artist Bill M iller considers him self the latter. D raw ing on mixed M ohican and G erm an ancestral roots, he blends folk, country, rock and blues in a soul stirring style that earned him nom inations for “Best M ale A rtist,” “A rtist o f the Year,” “Songw riter o f the Year" and “Best Flutist o f the Year” at the 1998 Native A m erican M usic awards. T h e Four W inds C oncert Series blows M iller’s trio into the area for two concerts. Proceeds benefit the D aw nland Center, an inter-tribal organization supporting com m unity-healing program s on and o ff the reservation.

M O N T R E A L 'S M O S T PR O VO CAT IVE C H O R EO G R A P H ER

Friday, May 7. Ira Allen Chapel UVM, Burlington, 8 pan. $15. Info, 229-0601. Saturday, May 8. Spaulding Auditorium, Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 8 pan. $12.50. Info, 603-646-2422.

live aid:

T h ere’s n o t m uch m usic playing in Kosovo these days, b u t if there were, it'd surely be the blues. So it's fitting that Sw anton’s N obby Reed Project should headline a benefit to bring relief to refugees in w ar-torn region. 1 h a ts sm okin Mues, folks. Join ing them on the benevolent bill are pop rockers I he N aturals. A silent auction and raffle raise m ore cash for the cause. Be prepared to shake a leg, on the finest planks in the state.

Saturday, May 8. Old Lantern, Charlotte, 8 pan. $10. Info, 425-3916.

ollege St., Burlington, 8 p.m. $3-6.

f , 865-3144. Pf/IRONM ENTAL B O O K G RO U I re we participators or perpetrators in ie natural world? Get eco-oriented lswers from a discussion o f Daniel B. otkins Discordant Harmonies. South l4 ° Community Library, 7 p.m. Free, ‘i . 372-6209. *ARMIC TRACES’: Octavio Paz a«sIator Eliot Weinberger transports # "y th s to the present day in a read&"f Ids critical work. Starr Library, iddlebury College, 4:30 p.m. Free. 4 443-5502.

ids 5NG AND STORYTIME: The >4er-three crowd drops in for tunes ‘<|taks. Fletcher Free Library, J|ington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 15-7216.

JJMESCHOOLERS’ STORYTIME: ^-at-home students five and up share tic anecdotes from the playing Is' Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, *-2:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. RVl IME: Four- and five-year-olds W stories, songs, finger plays and m s>South Burlington Com m unity ■ ary> 11 a.m. Free. Register, >1-7080.

'RlES: Little listeners hear stories, ft and make crafts at the Children’s 4 s,Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info,

>5-1537.

STORY H O U R: Preschoolers and accompanying adults get a taste of Once Upon a M udpie and work with clay under a “kid-certified” potter. Kids in kindergarten through fifth grade attend the later session. Vermont Clay Studio, Waterbury, 10 a.m. & 3:30 p.m. Free. Info, 244-1126.

sport SEN IO R WALKS: Stroll for fitness in health-conscious company. Weekly walks start at Leddy Park Arena, Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Register, 864-0123. SEN IO R BIKE TO U R : Peddle pushers tool around town with guides from Burlington Parks and Recreation. Leddy Park Arena, Burlington, 7 p.m. $5. Info, 864-0123.

etc 'M O TH E R S & T H E IR INFANTS’ D ISCUSSIO N: Psychotherapists Iren Smolanski and Mina Levinsky-Wohl analyze “Expectations and Realities” o f the early childhood years. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10:45-11:45 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. ‘TRAIL O F T W O C IT IE S’ TOU R: Walk the route o f a proposed WinooskiBurlington trail and bridge. Meet at Gardener’s Supply, 128 Intervale Rd., Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-2974.

KOSOVO PEACE G ATHERIN G: Presentations, discussion and music raise funds to send “com m unity facilitators” to the war-torn Balkans. Bethany Church, Montpelier, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 229-1165. ‘C O M M U N IT Y C H A M P IO N S ’ AWARDS D IN N ER: The United Way toasts its strongest supporters at this cel ebration. Radisson Hotel, Burlington, 5:30 p.m. $2. Info, 864-7541. ALL STATE M U SIC PARADE: Highschool musicians march to the beat of many different drummers down Main St., Winooski, 6 p.m. Free. Info, 651-9432. ‘G ET O U T O F MY LIFE’ PARENT IN G W O RK SH O P: A group o f parent ing organizations and experts tackle the challenge o f raising teenagers. Champlain Valley Union High School, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 482-3885. DRUG PR EV EN TIO N FORUM : If an ounce o f prevention is worth a pound of cure, then why is it so hard to keep youth away from drugs? Work toward answers at the Town Hall Auditorium, Cabot, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 563-3338. FIBROMYALGIA SU PPO R T GROUP: This neuromuscular pain and fatigue syndrome affects more women than men. Join fellow sufferers in the Board Room, Fanny Allen Campus, Colchester, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 862-3273.

Ccmpagnie Marie Chcuinard Friday, M a y 21 at 8 pm Quebec choreographer Marie Chouinard’s pulsating “body art” explores myth, ritual, and sexuality, celebrating both the sacred and the profane. Compagnie Marie Chouinard presents a 20-year retrospective of the celebrated choreographer’s explosive solo work, creating a fascinating theatrical whole with spectacular lighting, astounding costumes, and original music. Sponsored by

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SEVEN DAYS

page 25

BATTERED W O M E N V O LU N TEERS: Attend an orientation ses sion covering domestic violence edu cation and volunteer opportunities with Women Helping Battered Women. UVM W omens Center, 34 South Williams St., Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 658-3131.

W OOLF?’: Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton slug it out as a duel ing dysfunctional couple in this adaptation o f Edward Albee’s play. Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum of Art, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 7 p.m. $6. Info, 603-6462422.

art

tnursday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” A C O U ST IC M U SIC IA N ’S C O -O P: Songwriters compare notes in a works-in-progress workshop. Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 8 p.m. Donations. Info, 865-9603. AT I. STATE M U SIC CON CERT: Music scholarship recipients play the selections that earned them top status at Colchester High School, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 651-9432. D A R T M O U T H COLLEGE CHAM BER SINGERS: Student vocalists lead a musical tour of England spanning six song-filled cen turies. Rollins Chapel, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 8 p.m. $7. Info, 603-646-2422.

drama ‘SYLVIA’: See May 5. ‘ELEANOR ROOSEVELT’: Elena D odd plays the spirited wife o f President Franklin Delano Roosevelt in a solo character study. Bradford Academy, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 222-9026. ‘MEDEA’: To what lengths will a woman go for love? Euripides’ tale o f passion, betrayal and brutal revenge offers a few answers from ancient Greece. Moore Theater, Hopkins Center, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 8 p.m. $7. Info, Info, 603-646-2422.

film ‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. ‘W H O ’S AFRAID O F V IRGINIA

• Also, see exhibit openings in the art listings. ‘SO M E T H O U G H T S O N PA IN TIN G ’: Artist Eric Aho shows slides o f his favorite and not-sofavorite work at T. W. Wood Gallery, Vermont College, Montpelier, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 828-8743.

words DANIEL LUSK: The local poet reads from his new book o f verse, Kissing the Ground, at Bear Pond Books, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 229-0774. POETRY READING: Slammer Paul Gagnon recites verse with verve at Daily Bread Bakery, Richmond, 7:30 p.m. Donations. Info, 434-3148. PARENT-TEEN D ISCUSSION G RO UP: Reading relations find common ground in Divakaruni’s Mistress o f Spices. Deerleap Books, Bristol, 7-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 453-5684. ‘DANVIS TALES’: After a reception, poet and editor David Budbill recounts stories from 19th-century Vermont author Rowland E. Robinson. Sheldon Museum, Middlebury, 5:30 p.m. Tree. Info, 388-2117.

kids STORYTIM E & CRAFTS: Cultural activities keep three- to six-year-olds occupied at the Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10-10:45 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. PARENTS A NONYM OUS: Parents gather for support and assistance around the challenges o f childrearing. Babysitting goes with the program at two meetings in Burlington and M ilton, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 800-639-4014. STORY H O U R : Young readers learn

from lighthearted literature in a country setting. Flying Pig Children’s Books, Charlotte, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 425-2600. ‘NESTS, EGGS & FEATHERS’: Preschoolers return to the nest to check in on chicks. Green Mountain Audubon Society, Huntington, 1-2 p.m. $3. Register, 434-3068.

sport W O M E N ’S RUGBY: The Burlington Rugby Football Club invites beginning and veteran scrummers to spring training. Fort Ethan Allen, Colchester, 5:30-7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-3529.

etc 'V ER M O N T AND BEYOND': Formerly of the Vermont Arts Council, Ellen McCulloch-Lovell is now deputy assistant to President Clinton on millennium matters. She charts a course for “The Future of Arts and Humanities” in Memorial Lounge, Waterman, UVM, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-4389. NATURAL HISTORY W ALK Get a closer look at Vermont’s “serpentine communities” on an eco-outing. 129 Marsh Life Science Building, UVM, Burlington, noon - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 656-0423. BENEFIT A UCTION : Antique prints, historic Burlington photos and local art treasures go on the block for books. See “to do” list, this issue. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7222. PARENTING W O RK SHO P: Parents with kids from three to eight discuss setting limits, self-esteem and emotional growth. H .O . Wheeler School, Burlington, 11:45 a.m. 1:15 p.m. Free. Register, 864-0377. JO B FAIR: Summer job seekers and career planners work the room for potential employees. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. Free. Info, 865-5320. ‘VEGETABLE GARDENING FOR D UM M IES’: Green-thumbed author Charlie Nardozzi offers tips on turn ing your home soil into a range of

veggies. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. MEDICAL HISTORY LECTURE: Dr. John Outwater’s talk takes to the slopes for a “History o f Ski Safety.” Given Building, UVM, Burlington, noon. Free. Info, 656-2540. C O M PO ST IN G W O RK SH O P: Learn how to put waste to work in your own backyard. Recycle N orth, 128 Intervale Rd., Burlington, 6:308 p.m. Info, 872-8111. Y2K FORUM: “Are You Ready?” T hat’s the big question at this smallbusiness-minded conference. Windjammer Conference Center, S. Burlington, 7:30-8:30 p.m. Free. Register, 800-464-7232. A D O PT IO N M EETIN G : Search and other related issues are on the agenda at a regular meeting of the Adoption Alliance of Vermont. South Burlington Comm unity Library, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 985-2464. T H R IF T SALE: Clothes and miscel lany are on the market at a benefit for Trinity United Methodist Church, Montpelier, 4-6 p.m. Free. Info, 229-9158. G LB TQ SU PPO R T G RO UP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. O utright Central Vermont, Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428. E M O TIO N S ANONYM OUS: Women suffering from depression, anxiety or any other mental or emo tional problem find sorority in this 12-step support group. Seneca Center, Champlain Mill, Winooski, 6-7 p.m. Free. Info, 660-9036.

trio lay down a soulful, spiritual set. See “to do” list, this issue. Ira Allen Chapel, UVM, Burlington, 8 p.m. $15. Info, 229-0601. V ER M O N T SYM PHONY O RCHESTRA: Jamie Laredo debuts as conductor in a program o f works by Rossini, Saint-Saens, Brahms and Prokofiev. Flynn Theatre, Burlington, 8 p.m. $9-31. Info, 863-5966. G O T T FR IED & YOUNG: The local singing-songwriting duo plays hits “like a living jukebox” at Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 8 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. PIA NO CON CERT: Paula EnnisDwyer performs French and Russian songs by Chopin, Messiaen, Ravel, Rachmaninoff and Stravinsky. Barre Opera House, 8 p.m. $12. Info, 476-8188. BAWDY & SOUL: The comical, irreverent songsters entertain while you eat. It’s a dinner cabaret at the Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 6-9 p.m. $10. Info, 229-5118. PATRICK FITZSIM M O N S: The local folk singer-songwriter accompa nies the book browsing at Deerleap Books, Bristol, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 453-5684. D A R T M O U T H W IN D SYMPHONY: The student ensemble voyages “Down to the Sea” with a program of salty works by Vaughan Williams, Wagner, Edward MacDowell and Richard Rodgers. Spaulding Auditorium, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 8 p.m. $7. Info, 603-646-2422.

Iriday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” ALL STATE M U SIC CONCERT: See May 6, $5. This program features jazz selections. BILL MILLER: The acclaimed First Nations singer-songwriter and his

dance Y O U TH CELEBRATION: Local deejays put a fresh spin on Youth Advocacy M onth with a post-speakout dance. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7-11 p.m. Free. Info, 658-2704. SPR IN G SINGLES PARTY: Swing into the season at this jumping-jive bash with blues belters Bloozotomy. Club Metronome, Burlington, 9 p.m. $10. Info, 864-5684. ‘RAYMONDA’: The Vermont Conservatory o f Ballet performs this family-friendly classical piece that

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alendar blends birthday and wedding themes. Essex High School, 7 p.m. $7. Info, 878-2941.

drama ‘SYLVIA’: See May 5. ‘MEDEA’: See May 6. SW IN G M U R D ER MYSTERY: The ’30s roar with more than music at this cabaret caper set in the “Lion’s Den” speakeasy. St. John’s Club, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. $35. Info, 864-9778. ‘T H R E E PO STCA RD S’: The Middlebury Com m unity Players stage this “free-form musical” about old friends reuniting in a New York restaurant. Town Hall Theater, Middlebury, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 388-3345. ‘M O U SETRA P’: Agatha Christie’s murder mystery takes comic turns as English inn guests try to guess who’s “it.” Haskell Opera House, Derby Line, 7:30 p.m. $8. Info, 334-8145.

film ‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. Plaza Movieplex, Rutland. Info, 775-5500.

art • Also, see exhibit openings in the art listings. FIRST FRIDAY TO U R : Art lovers indulge in an evening o f gallery hop ping via trolley service linking exhibits at the Arts Alive, Firehouse, Exquisite Corpse, Doll Anstadt, Frog Hollow, Men’s Room and Rhombus galleries. Downtown Burlington, 5-8 p.m. Free. Info, 865-7166. M O N T PE L IE R GALLERY WALK: Check out crafts, creative canvas and cheap art on a culture crawl through downtown Montpelier. Ten locations, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info, 229-2766.

words B U R LIN G TO N POETRY SLAM: Organizers describe this word wran gle as “a cross between a boxing match and a tent revival.” See “to do” list, this issue. Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., 9 p.m. $3-6. Info, 862-6536.

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DAVID G O O D M A N : The local activist and author o f Fault Lines: Journeys Into the New South Ajrica presents slides o f his apartheid encounters. Book Rack, Champlain Mill, Winooski, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 655-0231.

kids SO N G A N D STORYTIME: The under-three crowd drops in for tunes and tales. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10:15 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. ‘M U SIC W IT H ROBERT RESNIK’: Kids sing songs with the musical host of Vermont Public Radio’s folk show “All the Traditions.” Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. STORY H O U R : Toddlers listen to stories at the M ilton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

members o f the Vermont Astronom ical Society. Hinesburg, 10-11 p.m. Free. Info and directions, 985-3269. T H E FUTURE O F O U R F O O D ’: Vermont Fresh Network sponsors this discussion about the merits o f “slow”— as opposed to “fast” — food. See “to do” list, this issue. The Inn at Essex, 1:30 p.m. Free. Info, 223-9274. G LB T Q SU PPO R T G RO UP: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth make new friends and get support. O utright Vermont, Burlington, 6:30-9 p.m. Free. Info, 800-452-2428. BATTERED W O M E N ’S SUP PO R T G RO UP: Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 9:30-11 a.m. Free. Info, 658-1996.

etc T H R IF T SALE: See May 6, 9 a.m. 2 p.m. E M O TIO N S A NONYM OUS: See May 6. This co-ed section welcomes men. Y O U TH SPEAKOUT: Area youths sound off on everything from the Colorado massacre to the lack o f a local skatepark. See “to do “ list, this issue. Steps of Burlington City Hall, 4:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 658-2704. ST U D E N T T O W N M EETING : U.S. Rep. Bernard Sanders yields the floor to students with issues to dis cuss. Campus Center Theater, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 9 a.m. - 3 p.m. Free. Info, 862-0697. MAYFAIR: Celebrate spring with a silent auction and family fun to fund enrichment programs at Edmunds Elementary School, Burlington, 4-7 p.m. Free. Info, 862-0231. D IN N E R A ND ART A UCTION : Bid on visual art and handmade crafts to help finance creative pro gramming at the Shelburne Craft School. Shelburne Farms, 6 p.m. ' $30. Info, 985-3648. O PE N OBSERVATORY: Get a good look at the spring sky with observant

music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” V ER M O N T SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA: See May 7. ALL STATE M U SIC CONCERT: See May 6, 2 & 7:30 p.m. $7. Large band and chorus ensembles are featured. BILL MILLER: See May 7, Spaulding Auditorium, Dartm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 8 p.m. $12.50. Info, 603-646-2422. KOSOVO REFUGEE BENEFIT: The Naturals pop in on the Nobby Reed Project for a rocking blues ben efit for war victims in the Balkans. See “to do” list, this issue. Old Lantern, Charlotte, 8 p.m. $10. Info, 425-3916. W O O D ’S TEA COMPANY: The Vermont-based folk faves use tradi tional acoustic music to drum up support for a young cancer patient. Cambridge Elementary School, 7 p.m. $5. Info, 644-5320. W EST AFRICAN DANCE A ND DRUM : Jeh Kulu Dance and Drum Theater performs a program featur ing three West African artists now

living in Vermont. Union Elementary School, Montpelier, 7:30 - 9:30 p.m. $10. Info, 425-4544. SOLARFEST: Folk musicians play in Celtic and Quebecois styles to pro mote “energy education through the arts,” and tasty desserts. Unitarian Universalist Church, Rutland, 7:30 p.m. $5. Info, 235-2050.

dance ‘RAYMQNDA’: See May 7, 3 &C 1 p.m. Y O U TH PR ID E PROM : Gay, les bian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth o f all ages have a ball at this “Heroes and Villains”themed dance. Burlington City Hall Auditorium, 7:30-11 p.m. $5. Info, 865-9677. C O N T R A DANCE: The Queen City Contras host this northern-style hoedown with Larry Edelman calling for Pete and Karen Sutherland and Mark Sustic. Kick things off with a potluck and free lesson. Edmunds Middle School, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. $6. Info, 865-9363.

drama ‘SYLVIA’: See May 5. ‘M O U SETRA P’: See May 7. ‘T H R E E POSTCARDS’: See May 7. ‘MEDEA’: See May 6. ‘GLORIA’: A multigenerational cho rus from the Lake Champlain Waldorf School performs Vivaldi’s masterwork to benefit school pro grams. Shelburne Farms, 5:30 p.m. $15. Info, 985-2827. ‘H.M .S. PIN AFO RE’: The Montreal West Operatic Society stages the Gilbert and Sullivan satire of seafar ing sirs, captains and the women they adore. Fuller Hall, St. Johnsbury, 8 p.m. $15. Info, 748-2600.

film ‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. Plaza Movieplex, Rudand. Info, 775-5500. ‘PIC TU R E B RID E’: A Japanese mail-order bride arrives in Hawaii expecting paradise — and a much younger husband — in Kayo H atta’s 1995 drama. Loew Auditorium, Hood Museum o f Art, D artm outh

College, Hanover, N .H ., 7 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

words SUSAN BARTLETT WEBER: The Calais author reads from her new “early reader,” entitled Seal Island School. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 2 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. LOLA VAN WAGENEN: The cofounder o f Clio, Inc., turns “An Eye on the Past” with the American Association o f University Women. Crea Lintihlac home, Shelburne Farms, 12:30 p.m. $15. Register, 860-1910.

kids STORY TIM E : Kids three and up listen to literature read aloud. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216. STORYTIME: Young readers delve into classic and new tales at a halfhour happening. Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. GEOM ANCY TALK: Dr. Patrick MacManaway uses slides to set the story straight on “Labyrinths, Wellsprings and Sacred Circles.” All Saints Episcopal Church, S. Burlington, 10-11:30 a.m. Free. Info, 658-5713. M ATH TUTORIALS: High-school ers take the “num b” out of numberscrunching at this weekly session with Dr. Samuel J. Klein. Room 373, Jeanmarie Hall, St. Michael’s College, Colchester, 9 a.m. - noon. Free. Info, 865-5039. SHELBURNE H O U SE TO U R : Kids get a glimpse o f Victorian grandeur at The Inn at Shelburne Farms, 10 a.m. $5. Register, 985-8442. EVELYN BURRILL: The Vermont storyteller shares tales of dragons and dolphins with kids at Flying Pig Children’s Books, Charlotte, 1-3 p.m. Free. Info, 425-2600. WALK/FUN RUN: Youngsters run up to five miles to raise money for a sexual assault prevention program. Taylor Park, St. Albans, 9 a.m. $10. Register, 524-8538.

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may 5, .1999

SEVEN DAYS

W RESTLIN G TO U RNA M ENT: Fighters o f all ages and abilities go to the mat in the Gymnastics Room, Patrick Gym, UVM, Burlington, noon - 4 p.m. $1. Info, 868-2855. V E R M O N T GOLF EXPO: A longp utt contest, fashion show, giveaways and gear galore make this fairway fair worth the drive. Champlain Valley Exposition, Essex Junction, 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. $8. Info, 434-2766. SKATEFEST ’99: Roll on rails, ramps and the Burlington bike path at a corporate-sponsored demo day. W ing Building, Burlington Waterfront, 11 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 658-3313. L O N G TRAIL CLEARING: Bring lunch, water and work gloves on a five-mile spring clearing o f the Long Trail near Bolton Notch. Info, 879-1457. M ISSISSQUOI RIVER PADDLE: Get a good look at the heron rookery on this flat-water adventure roughly eight miles long. Meet at Montpelier High School, 8:30 a.m. Free. Info, 223-7035.

Locaity Grown

POTTED HERBS HANGING FLOWER BASKETS ARE : in i

T H R IF T SALE: See May 6, 9 a.m. 11 a.m. Y O U TH PR ID E SPEAKOUT: Gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and questioning youth say it loud and proud on the steps o f Burlington City Hall, 3-5 p.m. Free. Info, 865-9677. H O R SE BARN G RA ND O PE N IN G : The public trots out to cele brate a new equine facility built with the help o f benefactor Amy Tarrant. UVM Farm, S. Burlington, 1:303:30 p.m. Free. Info, 656-2070. EVERYTHING SALE: Rummage around for furniture, toys, clothing and all kinds o f bargains to benefit the Stem Center Scholarship Fund. First Congregational Church, Essex Junction, 8 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 878-2332. M ORGAN H O R SE LECTURE: A panel o f horse historians mounts a retrospective o f the Morgan’s contri

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bution. National Museum o f the Morgan Horse, Shelburne, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 985-8665. SHELBURNE H O U SE TOU R: Wannabe Webbs get a guided tour o f the grand and historic Queen Annestyle abode. The Inn at Shelburne Farms, noon - 4 p.m. $10. Register, 985-8442. BIRD WALK: Take a gander at wildlife on the wing and branch at the Green Mountain Audubon Society, Huntington, 7 a.m. $4. Register, 434-3068. CRAFT FAIR: Hallmark takes a back seat at this “Day Before M other’s Day” craft sale. Fairfield Center School, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 827-3733. HEALTHY PARENTING CELEBRATION: Workshops on breastfeeding, immunization and infant massage mark Mother’s Day weekend at the Unitarian Church, Montpelier, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Free. Info, 229-1758. ELECTRIC C O O P ANNIVER SARY: Dinner, storytelling, pup peteers, dancing and Marko the Magician celebrate six decades of work by the Washington Electric Coop. City Hall, Montpelier, 2-11 p.m. $3-5. Info, 223-5245. ‘WALK FO R T H E ANIMALS’: Pooches are on parade at this fundraiser for the Central Vermont H umane Society. Blue Cross Blue Shield, Berlin, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 476-3811. C H ILD SAFETY SEAT INSPECTIONS: Bring your tot’s car seat to this checkpoint run by the Governor’s Highway Safety Program. Old Parking Garage, Rudand, 10 a.m. - 2 p.m. Free. Info, 241-5503.

UVM crooners sing Barber’s “Reincarnations,” Berger’s “Villanella” and some risqu£ French num bers at St. Paul’s Cathedral, Burling ton, 3 p.m. $8. Info, 656-3040. VILLAGE/NORTHERN HARM O NY: The multigenerational vocal ensembles perform a Mother’s Day concert after a family tea. Bethany Church, Montpelier, 2:30 p.m. $10. Info, 626-3109.

drama ‘T H R EE POSTCARDS’: See May 7, 2 p.m. ‘SYLVIA’: See May 5, 5 p.m.

‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. Plaza Movieplex, Rudand. Info, 775-5500. ‘SECRETS AND LIES’: A young black adopted woman searches for her biological parents and discovers her mother — is not what she thought. Burlington College, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 862-9616. ‘A NIMAL H O U SE’: John Belushi stars in this John Landis comedy about a group o f debauched, doomed Delta House frat brothers. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, Dartm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45 & 9:15 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

V ER M O N T GOLF EXPO: See May 8, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. LON G TRAIL HIKE: Walk 11 miles between the County Road and Route 9 on this southernmost hike on the Long Trail. Info, 658-5869. M O T H E R ’S DAY PADDLE: A “mystery” awaits boaters on this moderate paddle with portage possi bilities. Meet at Montpelier High School, noon. Free. Info, 223-7035.

Sunday M OTHER’S DAY

music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” CATAM OUNT SINGERS: The

SHELBURNE H O U SE TOU R: See May 8, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. W ILDFLOW ER WALK: Search for spring flowers on a flora-filled walk at the Green Mountain Audubon

Society, Huntington, 2 p.m. $4, Register, 434-3068.

monday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” CHAM PLAIN ECHOES: Harmonious women compare notes at a weekly rehearsal with the all female barbershop chorus. The Pines, Dorset St., S. Burlington, 7-9:30 p.m. Free. Info, 862-9500.

‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. Plaza Movieplex, Rutland. Info, 775-5500,

‘SUPERSITTERS’: Young caregivers learn the babysitting basics, includ ing what to do in an emergency and whether or not it’s okay to raid the fridge. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 3:15-4:30 p.m. $15. Preregister, 865-7216. STORYTIME: Children from three to five enjoy stories, songs, finger plays and crafts. South Burlington Comm unity Library, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080.

T O W N FO U N D IN G LECTURE: Richford’s roots are the topic o f dis cussion with colonial and revolution ary American historian Jere Danielle. Richford Town Hall, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 848-3313. RUMMAGE A N D NEARLY N E W SALE: The whole family finds deals on clothes, household items and toys at a weekly yard sale. Ohavi Zedek Synagogue, N orth Prospect St., Burlington, 10 a.m. - 1 p.m. Free. Info, 862-2311.

Continued on page 32

CENTER M tU H T J;

World Music Percussion Ensemble Hafiz F. Shabazz, director

A fantastic musical excursion through Caribbean cultures and carnivals! ■ tP e r ez opens the Festival with a rofc| of ■ tja z z , Latm andjwfcorld music. ffe i|h § h i s • m chops with Dizzy Gillespie's United JK jSations Orchestra, Perez is know rtM his M charismatic mid p i^ ^ l p e r fcrm a n p i| ’ M ? Touted as one of the year's ten best records, J w his latest album, "Central Avenue” mixes Latin rhythms with elements o f Flamenco, Indian and S M f the Middle Eastern, Danilo's Trio includes John Benitez on bass and Antonio Sanchez on drums.

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WE WILL BEAT ANYBODY'S PRICES ! Birthday Parties • S trip -O -G ra m s Lingerie M o d e lin g Private O n e -o n -O n e Sessions W icked est B ach elo r Parties

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First Nations Sing

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Wednesdai Wednesday Thursday June jo Friday June u Saturday June u Sunday June 13

Presented in conjunction with the Native Americans at Dartmouth’s 27th annual Pow Wow A 6 ? c ; . y

Mon - Fri, 10 am - 6 pm • Sat, l pm - 6 pm • V isa /M C /A m e x/D isco ve r Hopkins Center, Dartmouth College, Hanover, NH 03755 • www.hop.dartmouth.edu

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TICKETS & INFORMATION 603.646.2422

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SEX MOB » . Swing S Ska Tent Lester Bowie Terrance Simlen Herbie Hancock/Wayne Shorter JAZZDANCE ' David Murray Tentet

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may 5,1,990 t

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acting IMPROVAND TECHNIQUE: Six Sundays, May 16, 23, 30 and June 6, 13, and 20. Rice High School, S. Burlington. $95. Register, 860-3611. Learn to portray a dramatic role by fin d ing the character in yourselfand develop ing it.

aikido AIKIDO OF CHAMPLAIN VALLEY: Adults, Mondays - Fridays, 5:45-6:45 p.m. and 7-8:15 p.m., Saturdays, 911:45 a.m. Children, Tuesdays & Thursdays, 3:45-4:45 p.m. Aikido of Champlain Valley, 17 E. Allen St., Winooski. $55/month, $120/three months, intro specials. Info, 654-6999. Study this graceful, flowing martial art to develop flexibility, confidence and selfdefense skills. AIKIDO OF VERMONT: Monday through Friday, 6-7 p.m. and 7-8 p.m., Saturday, 9-10:30 a.m., Sunday, 1011:30 a.m. Above Onion River Coop, 274 N. Winooski Ave., Burlington. Info, 862-9785. Practice the art o f Aikido in a safe and supportive environ ment.

art ‘TH E ZEN OF CREATIVE PAINTING’: Sunday, June 6, 1-4 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $75. Register, 655-0231. Jeanne Carbonetti teaches this elegant and simple approach to the cre ative process with an emphasis on rhythm.

business GETTING SERIOUS’: Mondays and Thursdays, May 17, 20, 24 and 27. Morrisville. $115. Grants available. Info, 846-7160. The Womens Small Business Program helps you explore the possibilities and realities o f business own ership by developing an entrepreneurial idea.

childbirth CHILDBIRTH PREPARATION: Sixweek sessions starting in June. Naturally You Childbirth, Jericho area. Info, 644-5962. Learn about pre-term labor and warning signs, birthing, and breastfeeding.

Mondays, 9:30-10 a.m. and 4-6:30 p.m. $30/week. Info, 425-5433. Theresa Bacon leads 12-week support groupsfo r women working through blocks to their creative process. New group forming.

dance/movement ‘EXPERIENTIAL ANATOMY’: Friday and Saturday, June 4, 5 and 6. Middlebury College. $350. Register, 443-5245. Learn to draw on brain-body connections that shape our view o f our selvesfo r teaching performance work or health practices.

feldenkrais® ‘AWARENESS THROUGH MOVE M EN T’: Mondays, 7:30-8:30 p.m. 35 King St, Burlington. Fridays, 9-10 a.m. Chace Mill, Burlington. Info, 434-5065. Enhance coordination, flexi bility, strength and awareness with the guided movement sequences o f Feldenkrais*.

healing ‘HOLOTROPIC BREATHWORK’: Thursday through Sunday, May 13 through 16, Rock Point, Burlington. Info, 800-404-7261. Get an extended weekend o f inner exploration and healing.

health W EIG HT LOSS: Ongoing Sundays, 7-9 p.m. Burlington. Register, 8637055. Lose weight and improve your body image with this behavior-modifica tion and lifestyle change program. ‘A LZHEIMER’S AND GRIEF’: Tuesday, May 11, 7 p.m. The Arbors, Harbor Rd., Shelburne. Free. Register, 985-8600. Discuss the grieving process as it relates to dementia. ‘UNLOCK YOUR NATURAL DESIRE’: Four Thursdays, May 6 through 27, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Shelburne Athletic Club. $129. Register, 651 7666. Unlock your desire to exercise and attain your ideal weight, using self-hypno sis, Reiki and aromatherapy.

herbs

creative process

‘JOYFULLY GESTATING’: Thursday, May 13, 6-8 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main St., Burlington. $15. Info, 865-HERB. Learn how herbs have been helping — and healing — the birthing processfo r centuries. FLOWER ESSENCES: Sunday, May 16, 10 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. Purple Shutter Herbs, Main St., Burlington. $20. Info, 865-HERB. Explore the gen tle healing power offlower essences.

‘EXPLORING YOUR CREATIVI TY’: Saturday, May 22, 10 a.m. 3 p.m. Stowe. $50. Info, 410-2081. Renew and inspire your creativity through writing and other means o f expression. ‘T H E CREATIVE SPIRIT AND HER SHADOWS’: Burlington and Charlotte groups now forming.

KENDO: Ongoing Wednesdays and Fridays, 6:45-8:30 p.m. Warren Town Hall. Donations. Info, 496-4669. Develop focus, control and power through this Japanese samurai sword-fencing mar tial art.

craft

kendo

WELCOME BABY VISITOR TRAINING’: Monday, May 10, 68:30 p.m. Pine St. Childcare Center, Burlington. Free. Register, 864-8523. Get training to offer welcome visits to parents with new babies in Chittenden County.

language FRENCH CAMP: Monday through Friday, July 12 through 16, 2-4 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $105. Register, 655-0231. Six- to eight-yearolds learn French through educational games, sports, art and song. ITALIAN: Ongoing individual and group classes, beginner to advanced, adults and children. Burlington. Info, 865-4795. Learn to speak this beautiful language from a native speaker and expe rienced teacher. ESL: Ongoing small group classes, beginners and intermediates. Vermont Adult Learning, Sloan Hall, Fort Ethan Allen, Colchester. Free. Info, 654-8677. Improve your listening speaking reading and writing skills in English as a second language.

meditation ‘TH E WAY OF THE SUFI’: Tuesdays, 7:30-9 p.m. S. Burlington. Free. Info, 658-2447. This Sufi-style meditation incorporates breath, sound and move ment. MEDITATION: First & third Sundays, 10 a.m. - noon. Burlington Shambhala Center, 187 S. Winooski Ave. Free. Info, 658-6795. Instructors teach non-sectarian and Tibetan Buddhist meditations. MEDITATION: Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m. Green Mountain Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane, Suite 203, Williston. Free. Info, 872-3797. Don’t just do something, sit there! GUIDED MEDITATION: Sundays, 10:30 a.m. The Shelburne Athletic Club, Shelburne Commons. Free. Info, 985-2229. Practice guided meditation for relaxation andfocus.

music MUSIC CAMP: Week-long camps in June, July and August. Monteverdi Music School, Montpelier. $100-150. Info, 229-9000. Kids and adults get instruction in fiddling, chamber music, piano, rock and blues.

photography PHOTOGRAPHY: Private or group, basic and intermediate classes. Grand Isle or Burlington. Info, 372-3104. Leant darkroom skills as well as how to choose, use and exploit the camera to express your creative style in color and black and white.

and levels. Vermont Clay Studio, Rt. 100, Waterbury Center. Info, 2241126. Enjoy the pleasures and challenges o f working with clay.

Plattsburgh. Free. Info, Help Line, 862-4516. I f you’re ready to stop using drug, this group o f recovering addicts can offer inspiration. PROBLEM DRINKER?: Group now forming in Burlington. Free. Info, 864-4635. Join a group o f people seeking an alternative to Alcoholics Anonymous.

reflexology FOOT AND HAND REFLEXOLO GY: Classes beginning soon. S. Burlington Yoga Studio, Barrett St. Info, 658-3766. Learn this fu n and easy form o f acupressurefoot and hand mas sagefrom a certified reflexologist.

women VOLUNTEER TRAINING: Two Saturdays and Sunday, May 15, 16 and 22. Burlington. Register, 658-3131. Train to be a volunteerfor Women Helping Battered Women.

reiki REIKI CLINIC: Wednesday, May 26, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Wnooski Ave., Burlington. Donations. Info, 660-8060. Experience this non-invasive, hands-on healing tech nique that originated in the East.

writing

BUJINKAN NINJUTSU: Ongoing Tuesdays and Thursdays, 6:30-8:30 p.m. and Sundays, 9:30-11:30 a.m. Burlington. Info, 482-4924. This selfdefense style emphasizes relaxed, natural movement and distance to overcome an opponent. BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU: Ongoing classes for men, women and children, Monday through Saturday. Vermont Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy, 4 Howard St., Burlington. Info, 660-4072 or 253-9730. Escapefear with an integrated self-defense system based on technique, not size, strength or speed.

‘DIALOGUE IN FICTIO N ’: Six Thursdays, May 13 through June 17, 6-8 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $90. Register, 655-0231. Discuss ways dialogue can focus conflict, move the story forward and reveal character. SISTERS IN CRIME’: Friday, June 18,7 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. Free. Register, 655-0231. Four successful mystery writers discuss “howdunnit. “ MYSTERY W RITING: Saturday, June 19, 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. The Book Rack, Winooski. $69. Register, 655-0231. Learn how to create suspense through lit erary clues and red herring. POETRY W ORKSHOP: Thursdays, 1 p.m. Ilsley Public Library, Middlebury. Free. Info, 388-7523. Bring a poem or two to read and discuss a t this ongoing workshop.

spirit

yoga

self-defense

INTRO TO REBIRTHING: Friday, May 7, 6-8 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington. Free. Info, 660-8060. Gain mental clar ity, inner peace and emotional insight using “connected breathing. “ ‘EDGES OF REALITY II: CROP CIRCLES’: Sunday, May 9, 1-4:30 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. Winooski Ave., Burlington. $20. Info, 660-8060. Discuss the myths and realities o f crop circles. ‘INNER JOURNEYS GROUP’: Monday, May 10, 6:30-8 p.m. Spirit Dancer Books, 125 S. W nooski Ave., Burlington. $3. Info, 660-8060. Focus on your “inner journey”through talking and group-guided meditation.

BEECHER HILL YOGA: MondaySaturday, daytime & evening classes for all levels. Info, 482-3191. Get private or goup instruction in integrative yoga, vig orous yoga, yoga fo r pregnancy or yoga for health and well-being. S. BURLINGTON YOGA: Ongoing Tuesdays, 6-7:15 p.m., Thursdays, 6:30-7:45 p.m. and Wednesdays, 910:15 a.m. Barrett St., S. Burlington. Info, 658-3766. Focus on stretching breathing, relaxation and centering with Hatha yoga. YOGA: Wednesdays, 7 p.m. Green Mt. Learning Center, 13 Dorset Lane, Williston. $8. Info, 872-3797. Practice yoga with Deborah Binder. YOGA AT T H E CREAMERY: Tuesdays and Thursdays, 7-8:30 p.m., Fridays, 9:30-11 a.m., Saturdays, 45:30 p.m. The Creamery, Shelburne. $10/dass, $60/eight classes. Info, 4822490. Practice Iyengar style yoga using props to align the body. YOGA VERMONT: Daily classes, 12 p.m., 5:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, 9:30 a.m. Chace Mill, Burlington. Info, 660-9718. Astanga style “power”yoga classes offer sweaty fu n fo r all levels o f experience. YMCA YOGA: Ongoing classes. YMCA, College St., Burlington. Info, 862-9622. Take classes in various yoga styles. ®

stress management STRESS MANAGEMENT/MEDITATION: Ongoing Thursdays, 7-7:30 p.m. meditation; 7:30-8:30 p.m. stress management. Maltex Building, 431 Pine St., Suite 10, Burlington. First class free, $5/meditation, $10/stress management. Info, 862-6931. Theresa Bacon offers information, support, exercis es and consultation in meditation and stress management.

pottery

support groups

POTTERY CLASSES: Ongoing day, evening and weekend classes for all ages

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: Ongoing daily groups. Various loca tions in Burlington, S. Burlington and

PAINTING CERAMICS: Ongoing Wednesdays, 2-3:30 p.m. and 5:30-7 p.m. Blue Plate Ceramic Cafe, 119 College St., Burlington. Free. Info, 652-0102. Learn the fundamentals o f painting ceramics.

kids

MAY CLASSES

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L O V IN G Y O U R C A N C E R

May 8,9:30 a.m. - noon. Learn to trust in your ability to heal the self. $40 E X P L O R IN G Y O U R C R E A T IV IT Y

May 22, 10:00 a.m.-3:00 p.m. Renew, refresh and inspire through writing and other vehicles to discover and invite your creativity. $50

2820 Shelburne Road,» ShelEume, V T » Daily 9am-9pm

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T A P P IN G Y O U R IN N E R S O U R C E

SHIRLEY KN APP

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May 26,7:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. Tune in to the energy already present in your life to embrace joy. $35

holistic teacher, healer A W A K E N IN G Y O U R G IF T O F IN T U IT IO N and author of M aV 16~20: 4' day retreat. $995.

5:30 PM CH BARN ONATION

Sustaining Joy

IN D IVID UA L SESSIONS BY APPOINTM ENT & PHONE. www.northwindsprod.com Northwinds Productions, Inc., Mountain Rd., Stowe, VT 05672-0781 (800) 410-2081 or (802) 253-2081 or northwnd@sover.net

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TIBET

Demonstrating Sacred Tibetan A rts o f healing w ith the tantric music and dance o f D rikung Kagyu tradition

BARRE O PERA H O U SE Friday, May 14,7:30 pm 476-8188

W O R L D PEACE PARAD E Saturday, May 15, 11:00 am Montpelier State House Lawn, - meditation at 10:30

NORTH C O N G R E G A T IO N A L

co-sponsored by

catamount

CHURCH Saturday, May 15,8:00 pm Stjohnsbury

Help support the monks and win a Powerbook 160-100 series, courtesy of Darrad’s .... (all (802) 223-5435 for raffle and other event information.

T HE

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PUBLIC TALK:

M editation

T ibetan M edicine

Wednesday, May 12,7pm

Thursday, May 13,5pm

Montpelier U U Church

Central V T Medical Center

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Jaime Laredo leads the VSO in two concerts in his debut as Artistic Advisor Friday, May 7, 8pm Saturday, May 8, 8pm V

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Jaime Laredo, conductor Jennifer Koh, violinist

Rossini Overture to La Gazza Ladra (The Thieving Magpie) Saint-Saens Introduction and Rondo Capriccioso Brahms Symphony No. 4 Plus— Friday: Keith Jarrett Elegy for Violin and Orchestra Saturday: Prokofiev Violin Concerto No. 1 Saturday sponsors

Westaff. W

Natalie Lisman Guest Soloist Fund

No rth C o u n try

O r d e r Yo u r T i c k e t s To d a y !

802) 864-5741 ext. 12 VSO TicketLine L-800-VS0-9293 ext. 12 Toll-Free 802) 86-FLYNN Flynn Theatre Box Office

The VSO’s 1998/1999 Season is sponsored in part by

NORTHERN If *

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Calendar Continued from page 28

kids

‘RU12’ C EN TER POTLUCK: Folks interested in creating a com m unity space for gay, lesbian, bisex ual and transgendered people dine and dish about the next step. Rhombus Gallery, 186 College St., Burlington, 6-8 p.m. Free. Info, 860-1044. AM NESTY IN TERN ATIO NA L W R ITE-IN : Save a life for the price o f a stamp. Use pen power against hum an rights abuses at the Unitarian Church, Burlington, 5:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-4838. TEEN HEALTH C LIN IC: Teens get information, supplies, screening and treatm ent for sexually related problems. Planned Parenthood, Burlington, 3:30-6 p.m. Pregnancy testing is free. Info, 863-6326. BATTERED W O M E N ’S SU PPO R T GROUPS: Women Helping Battered Women facilitates a group in Burlington, 6:30-8 p.m. Free. Info, 658-1996. Also, the Shelter Committee facilitates a meeting in Montpelier, 5:30-7 p.m. Free. Info, 223-0855.

‘M U SIC W IT H ROBERT RESNIIC: Kids sing songs with the musical host of Vermont Public Radio’s folk show “All the Traditions.” Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 865-7216. STORIES A N D CRAFTS: Children cut and paste to the chase after a morning story Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 11 a.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. H O M ESC H O O LER S GYM A N D CRAFTS: Stay-at-home students take part in extracurricular activities at the Burlington Boys and Girls Club, Oak St., Burlington, 9:30 a.m. - 12:30 p.m. $1. Info, 860-1299. FATHERS A N D CHILD REN TO G E TH E R : Dads and their kids get together for stories, crafts and a fatherly chat. H .O . Wheeler School, Burlington, 5-7 p.m. Free. Info, 864-0377. STORY TIM E: Kids under three listen in at the South Burlington Com m unity Library, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 652-7080. STORY H O U R : Kids between three and five engage in artful edu cational activities. Milton Public Library, 10:30 a.m. & 1 p.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

tuesday music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” T RE BRASS: A trumpet, horn and trombone trio play chamber tunes from the Renaissance at St. Mary’s Church, Middlebury, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 388-2943. SHAPE N O T E SINGING: Fourpart harmonizers from the Northeast Kingdom Sacred Harp troupe invite others to join the chorus of 18thand 19th-century hymns. Bread & Puppet Theater, Glover, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 525-3031.

drama

Flynn Theatre, Burlington

Friday sponsors

v v ^ -.s

U T C T R A D IN 6

atI V I

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DRAMA G RO U P: Dramatists dis cuss ideas for shows and share the atrical experiences at this weekly get-together in Winooski, 7-8 p.m. Free. Info, 655-6083.

film ‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. Plaza Movieplex, Rutland. Info, 775-5500.

words T. G R E E N W O O D : The Vermontborn novelist of Breathing Water comes up for air at Borders, Church St. Marketplace, Burlington, 7:30 p.m. Free. Info, 865-2711. B U R LIN G TO N W RITERS G RO UP: Bring pencil, paper and the will to be inspired to this writerly gathering at the Daily Planet, Burlington, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 862-9647. ‘LOVERS IN LOVE’: This discus sion looks at literary loves spurned and spoofed in Manuel Puig’s Heartbreak Tango: A Serial S. rI Burlington C om m unity Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 652-7050. ‘FILM, FEASTS A N D FIC T IO N ’: Readers compare the film and literary versions o f Fannie Flagg’s Fried Green Tomatoes. M ilton Public Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 893-4644.

sport W O M E N ’S RUGBY: See May 6. O PEN W RESTLIN G PRAC TIC E: The UVM Wrestling team rolls out the mat for tusslers-intraining. Gymnastics Room, Patrick Gym, UV^d. Burlington, 7-9 p.8>t 1

etc ' ^

- v

Y2K FORUM : See May 6, Comfort Inn, St. Albans. C O M M U N IT Y SUPPER: Local folks dish it out at this neighborly meal. H .O . Wheeler School, Burlington, 5:30-6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 864-0377. ‘T H E C O ST O F D O IN G BUSINESS’: Get tips on lessening your company’s impact on the envi ronm ent and cutting costs in the process. Ben & Jerry’s Homemade, 30 Com m unity Dr., S. Burlington, 3:30-5 p.m. $10. Info, 862-8347. BEATRIX P O T T E R D ISCUSSIO N: Helene Lang revis its the life and legacy of the chil dren’s book author and sheep farmer. Waterbury Area Senior Citizens Center, 10:30 a.m. Free. Info, 244-1234. ‘LEGACIES O F T H E 20T H CENTURY’: Alan Berolzheimer surveys achievements in technology, social life and politics from a retro perspective. Rutland Free Library, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 773-1860. CAREGIVERS FO R T H E M EN TALLY ILL: Friends, family and anyone involved with the mentally ill get support at this monthly “share and care.” Howard Center for Human Services, 300 Flynn Ave., Burlington, 7-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, C O M862-6683. PAN Y OVEREATERS ANONYM OUS: Compulsive eaters weigh in on body image issues at the First Congregational Church, Essex Junction, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 644-8936. BATTERED W O M E N ’S SUP PO R T G RO U P: Meet in Barre, 10:30 a.ip. - noon. Free. Info, 223-0855.

Continued on page 34

^ oage 30 . " SEVEN DAYS

may 5,1999 ..jj

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SEVEN DAYS i I iV .

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may 5,1999

SEVEN DAYS

page 33 x

Calendar send-up o f small town life. Briggs Opera House, W hite River Junction, 8 p.m. $20. Info, 296-7000.

Continued from page 30

W ednesday wed music • Also, see listings in “Sound Advice.” PIA NO CON CERT: Arthur Dequasi performs a spring-themed program at St. Paul’s Cathedral, Burlington, noon. Free. Info, 864-0471. ‘FROM BACH T O BLUES’: Clarinetist Thomas Piercy brings along bass and piano on a soul-stir ring musical ride. Stowe C om m unity Church, noon. Free. Info, 253-7792.

drama ‘MEDEA’: See May 6. ‘GREATER TUN A ’: Our Town it’s not. Two actors portray 19 eccentric characters — all inhabits of Tuna, Texas — in this comic

• Also, see exhibit openings in the art listings. FIGURE DRAWING: See May 5.

SENIOR WALKS: See May 5 SEN IO R BIKE TO U R : See May

words

‘MY M O T H E R ’S EARLY LOVERS’: See May 5. Plaza Movieplex, Rutland. Info, 775-5500. ‘RAISING T H E ASHES’: The daughter o f a Holocaust survivor leads a discussion after this docu mentary about an “interfaith” retreat at the Auschwitz-Birkenau concentration camp. Deborah Rawson Library, Jericho, 7-9:30 p.m. Free. Info, 899-4962. ‘FESTIVE FEASTS’ DOUBLE FEATURE: Religious zealots learn love and forgiveness over a lavish meal in Babette’s Feast. Two Italian brothers host a banquet at their restaurant, hoping to lure a celebri ty diner in Big Night. Spaulding Auditorium, Hopkins Center, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 6:45 & 8:40 p.m. $6. Info, 603-646-2422.

PARENT-CHILD B O O K DIS CUSSION: Grown-up readers and their 11- and 12-year-old kids compare notes on Out o f the Dust, by Karen Hesse. Deerleap Books, Bristol, 7-8 p.m. Free. Info, 453-5684.

etc A .D .H .D . PARENT SU PPO R T N IG H T : Doctors and educators discuss research and medication for kids with Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder. Austin Auditorium, Fletcher Allen Healthcare, Burlington, 6:30-8:30 p.m. Free. Info, 65-1-7615. URBAN FORESTRY V OLUN TEERS: Branch O ut Burlington holds its monthly meeting to spruce up the city. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 6:30 p.m. Free. Info, 862-8245. WATER QUALITY C O N FER ENCE: Natural resource experts and regulators take a “watershed approach” to the state’s aquatic reserves. Campus Center Theater, Billings Student Center, UVM, Burlington, 9 a.m. Free. Info, 879-6153.

kids SO N G AND STORYTIME: The under-three crowd drops in for tunes and tales. Fletcher Free Library, Burlington, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 865-7216.STORYTIME: Four- and fiveyear-olds enjoy stories, songs, fin ger plays and crafts. South Burlington Comm unity Library, 11 a.m. Free. Register, 652-7080. STORIES: Little listeners hear sto ries, snack and make crafts at the Children’s Pages, Winooski, 10 a.m. Free. Info, 655-1537.

//*

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A m a z in g

o t h e r ’s

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Adults Kids 3 & under

C H R O N IC FATIGUE RALLY: Victims of this “silent illness” con vene to share pain and talk treat m ent on the steps of Burlington City Hall, noon. Free. Info, 800-296-1445. D IR EC T M A RKETING CON FEREN CE: Learn to put “magic” in your catalog, Internet and other direct-sales campaigns at this three-day event. Sheraton Conference Center, S. Burlington, 8 a.m. - 7:30 p.m. $249. Register, 888-886-4364. ‘EN TR EPR EN EU RSH IP FOR W O M E N ’: A six-member panel of women entrepreneurs shows others “the money” in a presentation on “Resources to Get You Started.” Sheraton Conference Center, S. Burlington, 5:30 p.m. $16-17. Info, 862-0571. ISLAMIC FUNDAMENTALISM LECTURE: Former U.N. Ambassador Mansour Farhang traces western influence on theIslamic world. Wake Robin, Shelburne, 3 p.m. Free. Info, 985-8411. ‘HEALTHY GIRLS’ PARENT IN G TALK: Author and psychol ogist Louise Dietzel affirms that “You Can Raise Healthy Girls.” Camel’s H um p Middle School, Richmond, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 434-2128. . RAINBOW BUSINESS MIXER: Rolfers Diane Rogers and Rebecca Riley give a hands-on presentation and silent auction. Jeff’s Maine Seafood, St. Albans, 6:30-8:30 p.m. $10. Info, 848-7037. TIBETAN M ED ITATIO N TALK: Venerable Bongtul Rinpoche shares words of wisdom on his world tour. Unitarian Universalist Church, Montpelier, 7 p.m. $5. Info, 223-5435. ‘V IK IN G VOYAGE 1000’: John Abbot chronicles his seafaring adventures aboard the Viking ship replica Snorri. City Center, UVM, Montpelier, noon. Free. Info, 223-0388.

$14.95 $6.95 Free

We make one of a Smoothie! tjK jl ** Happy Mothers Day. 0 &

Calendar is written by Erik Esckilsen.

Treat your MOMto a Smoothie. Bring inad with MOM&recieve $1 off on a 24oz. Fruit &BerrySmoothie. t l S I U l t l l t

57 ChuKl^tree^Marke1tolace802/ 86C^Sm oot/iie

R eservations R ecommended R oute 2A through T aft C orners

by Lucy Howe.

879-3100 _

All submissions are M

T E N

Sunday May 9th Make it a Family Affair Enjoy Mother’s Day H is to ric

E sse x

publication. S E V E N DAYS edits for 169 church s t r eet 862.9272

In n

space and style.

Essex, NY • C hoose on e o f our delectable specials or order right from our m en u • Our little folk m en u is sure to please even th e m o st finicky o f appetites • Save so m e room for o n e of our m em orable hom em ade desserts

~ We will be serving from 4:00 p.m. until 8:00 p.m. ~ Call 518-963-8821 for reservations ~

Just a short walk from the Essex Ferry Landing. Last return trip from Essex leaves at 7:30pm -

ssex

O n L a k e C h a m p l a in

<opage 34

1 6

a i n

treet

SEVEN DAYS

• E

ssex

, N

COME CELEBRATE MOTHERS' DAY WEEKEND WITH THE TEN MOTHERS. .

ork

may 5,1999

Send to: S E V E N DA YS, P.0. Box 1 1 6 4 ,

FREETen Mothers' Salad Dressing to all Mothers whojoin us for lunch or dinner Saturday or Sunday. Also, a FREEappetizer to those very same Mothers! Checkout our newmenutoo, May 8th &9th. F

g a rlic s p e c ia ltie s . h om em ad e breads . m icro b rew s se r v ic e w ith a sm ile

due in writing on the Thursday before

at the

Classes are compiled

O P E N

F O R

L U N C H

D I N N E R

Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 2 1 1 6 4 . Or fax 8028 6 5 - 1 0 1 5 . Email: sevenday@together.net

Gallup reports that 68 percent of. the people surveyed in this countr •■•irsiiiTt.

for the events in Littleton. VJJTsll 7 oes that mean? By M and

argy

L e v in e Y o u n g

Jo r d a n Y o u n g

e d id n ’t m achine-gun o u r classmates in high school. You w ould have heard a b o u t it if we had. B ut then , th a t was th e ’60s. Lots o f w eird stu ff happ en ed , b u t m ostly the violence was wholesale, organized by gov ernm ents, b o th dom estically and overseas. V iolence was n o t usually a d o -it-y o u rself thing. W e knew kids w ho were angry, alienated, disaffected drop-o u ts, b u t we got lucky. Back in the late ’60s, C laude Kagan, an engineer at a W estern Electric lab near where we grew up, fo u n d a b u n ch o f high-school kids w ho “wore trench coats.” C laude really liked electronic eq u ip m en t, and he u n d ersto o d it inside and o u t. H e let o u r group o f proto-geeks use his

L i t e ffJ W f L L

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hope you Poe6ivlfc ME R)£ SPEfOC>lK)e> ALLOofi.

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barn for club m eetings, and the kids w ent from playing w ith m odel rockets to pro gram m ing com puters — big m achines th a t to ok up a w hole barn, like the co m p u ter in the Bat Cave. H e p u t 15 kids in a barn w ith $ 5 0 ,0 00 w o rth o f co m p u ter eq u ip m en t to see w h at w ould happen. W h a t happ ened was th at th e kids w ho got the short end o f th e stick d u ring the week lived for those 12-hour w ork days o n Saturday. O n ly we d id n ’t call them w ork days, we ju st g o t deep in to the co m p u t er, an d started w riting the soft ware th a t eventually led to games like Q u ak e and D oom . Back in those days it was p ret ty technical, b u t we d id it w ith relish. I f there’s one th ing we’ve learned reading the news from th e past week, it’s th at being an u n p o p u la r high school student hasn’t gotten any better since

the ’60s. It’s gotten m uch, m uch worse, in fact, for the kids w ho don’t fit in, for the geeks and freaks and G oths and any other group you care to p u t a label to. T here was a landm ark study about growing up in the ’50s and ’60s called “G row ing U p in River C ity.” O n e o f the conclusions o f th at study was th at kids w ho are good at som ething succeed. It doesn’t m atter w hether its football or choir or juggling or fixing cars. W h a t was im p o rtan t was to find a passion and do it enough to feel like you’d mas tered it. - So after the massacre at Littleton, C olorado, w hat’s happening to the geeks and gamers and people w ho find their area o f success on the Internet? G allup reports th at 68 percent o f the people sur veyed in this country feel that the Internet is “to blam e” for

The

'Net

Result of Columbine the events in L ittleton. W h a t does th at mean? T h e In tern et is just all o f us. I f the In tern et is “to blam e,” th en Pogo’s fam ous dictu m is tru er th an ever: W e have m et the enem y and he is us. W ith the hysteria over this tragedy, thousands o f kids are getting h u rt. It surprised us th a t one o f the busiest W eb sites in this discussion has been w w w .slashdot.org. Slashdot is a technical site w ith an attitude, n o t afraid to recognize th at geeks have lives and are n o t just m arkets an d stereotypes. It’s the only place we know th at runs headlines like “M ozilla now supports all CSS1 properties,” and “Read m y review o f W ing Commander if you w ant to hear m e co m plain ab out another terrible sci-fi flick.” T h e ir slogan is “N ews for N erds S tu ff th at M atters.” Slashdot colum nist Jon Katz w rote a th o u ghtful assess m en t o f w hat w ent on in L ittleton, w hich appeared Friday. H is e-m ail box hasn’t cooled o ff since. Slashdot is ru n n in g in “overload m ode” trying to keep up w ith the traf fic. T h o usands o f young peo ple have w ritten in ab o u t how h ard it is to be a geek o r a nerd or a d o rk in high school. A nd they say it ju st g ot worse, because m any half-brained educators have decided th a t any kids w ith interests sim ilar to those o f Eric H arris and D ylan Klebold, or w ho feel left o u t o f the social scene, are highly suspicious. A nyone w ho uses the ’net, plays Q u ak e or D o o m , or dresses fu n n y has suddenly becom e a threat to society. T h e stories sent in to Slashdot are chilling. T h ey

include kids being yanked away from their com puters, kids being strip-searched because o f th eir clothes, kids getting suspended for playing In te rn e t games, an d kids w ho say they can identify w ith ostracized kids having their room searched by sheriffs. Are the stories true? W h o knows? B ut there sure are a lo t o f them . T housands. You can read th em yourself at h ttp ://slash d o t.o rg /article.p h si d = 9 9 /0 4 /2 5 /1 4 3 8 2 4 9 O n e o f the w riters p u t it best: W e sh o uldn’t be closing dow n w h at these kids excel at; we should be helping th em do it m ore, and better. W e shouldn’t be driving the D o o m players and M O O an d M U D denizens away. W e should be organizing D o o m clubs, chat room hosts and geek clubs — places w here th e w eird people h ang o u t an d w here it’s norm al to know a b o u t w h at happens o n the ’net. O n e proactive stu d e n t in N ashville decided to use the In te rn e t to circulate a pledge for h ig h school students. It reads th a t th e signer prom ises to stop tau n tin g those w ho dress, talk o r act differently. T h o u san d s o f kids all over the co u n try have already signed, an d th e In te rn e t allow ed th a t pledge to get passed around. W e haven’t seen it yet, b u t w e’re looking. I f you find it, let us know. W e th in k its a great idea. E ngagem ent is far b etter th an alienation. A nybody o u t there need a “responsible” ad u lt o r tw o to help m ake your geek-group legit in your high-school or ju n io r high? I f so, w rite us at M J7D ays@ gurus.com . W e’ll try to help. ®

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specific works of 22 artists and groups — performance, reading, live broadcast, experimental music, interactive video, and more. Polaroid documentation of the works are accumulating on the walls. Exquisite Corpse Artsite, Burlington, 864-8040, ext. 121. Performance by Susan Calza, May 5; performance sculpture by Jim Byrne, May 6; performance by Selene Colburn, May 7, 5-8 p.m. All other shows at 7 p.m. FIRST FRIDAY Art Trolley, ferrying gallery-goers for free to six loca tions around downtown Burlington, May 7, 5-8 p.m. Trolley departs from Firehouse Gallery. Info, call Burlington City Arts at 865-7166. JANET FREDERICKS, paintings, “O n Land and Water,” and ROB GREENE, jewelry. Grannis Gallery, Burlington, 660-2032. Reception May 7, 5-8 p.m. ARTISTS OF HOWARD COMMUNI TY SERVICES, featuring new work

from the GRACE Art Workshop Program, Union Station, Burlington, 472-6857. ReceptionMay 7i 5-7 p.m. HUGH T0WNLEY & EMILY BISSELL LAIRD, sculpture and paint

ings, respectively. Doll-Anstadt Gallery, Burlington, 864-3661. Reception May 7, 6-8 p.m. COLOR FUSION, featuring handpainted wooden bowls by Peggy Potter and art quilts by Janet Kurjan. Frog Hollow Craft Center, Burlington, 863-6458. Reception May 7, 6-8 p.m. BLACK & WHITE PHOTOGRAPHY

by Jeff Clarke, Paul Hagar, Laury Shea and Jordan Silverman. Rose Street Gallery, Burlington, 8623654. Reception May 7, 6-9 p.m. BARBARA WAGNER, New Paintings. Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery, Shelburne, 985-3848. Reception May 7, 6-8 p.m. AND SO, LIKE NATURE, Intimate Landscapes, Arctic to Sub-tropical, MFA thesis exhibit by Marionette Donnell Stock. Julian Scott Memorial Gallery, Johnson State College, 635-1310. Closing recep tion May 7, 4 p.m. GALLERY WALK, an evening of art viewing on foot, to nine sites around downtown Montpelier, 229-2766. May 7, 5-7 p.m. BEANS, BEANS...THE MORE YOU EAT THE MORE YOU ART, mixed-

media works by Montpelier High School art students. Montpelier City Hall Showcase, 229-2766. Reception May 7, 5-7 p.m.

o n g o in g B U R L IN G T O N

AREA

FRANK GUERRA, honors show.

Francis Colburn Gallery, UVM, Burlington, 656-2014. Through May 6. 1999 SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL ART SHOW, featuring works in multi-

media by students from Champlain Valley high schools. Pickering and Fletcher rooms, Fletcher Free Library, Burling-ton, 863-3403. Through May 26. SUPER CLOCKS, functional art clocks made by students of Stepping Stones Children’s Cen-ter, proceeds of which will fund a new computer for the school. Beverly’s Cafe, Burlington, 860-1915Through June 15. BENJAMIN ALBEE, ink and wash drawings. Daily Planet Restaurant, Burlington, 375-2282. Also, con structions in copper wire and flashing. Muddy Waters Cafe, Burlington. Both through May. PHOTO AND DESIGN '99, works in photography and graphic design by Champlain College Students. Hauke Campus Center Hallway Gallery, Champlain College, Burlington, 860-2700, ext. 2611. Through May 28. DANIEL LUSK, figure drawings in charcoal. Book Rack Exhibit

Space, Winooski, 655-0231. Through May. DRAWINGS FOR SH ELOVES

YOU, featuring pen-and-ink illus trations by Lance Richbourg for the book o f the same title by Elaine Segal. Fleming Museum,. Burlington,'656-0750. Through July 18. Through May 6. WIT AND WHIMSY, featuring watercolor drawings by Hal Mayforth, mixed-media and illus trations by Sarah Ryan. Flynn Gallery, Burlington, 652-4505. Through June 4. CATHARINE BALCO & DON TEETER, recent paintings and

drawings. Working Design Gallery at the Mens Room, Burlington, 864-2088. Through May. BOMBS AWAY, collage reactions to the bombing in Kosovo by UVM students. One Wall Gallery, Seven Days, Burlington, 864-5684. Through May. WAITING FOR THE BREAD TO RISE AND OTHER VARIATIONS,

handmade monoprints from sketches outside the kitchen win dow, by Roy Newton. Red Onion Cafe, Burlington, 865-2563. Through May 23. WENDY MOORE, monotypes. Better Bagel, Williston, 879-2808. Through May. GEORGE SMITH: SCULPTURE AND DRAWINGS, and TOIL AND SPIN: RECENT WORK BY KATH LEEN SCHNEIDER. Fleming

Museum, Burlington, 656-0750. Through May 16 and June 6, respectively. CENTRAL VERM O N T

SKYSCAPES & BEACH GRASS,

watercolors, brush drawings and oil pastels by Pria Cambio. About Thyme Cafe, Montpelier, 2230427. May 8 - June 6. ART RESOURCE ASSOCIATION

members’ exhibits in mixed media at the State House Cafeteria and City Center Lobby, Montpelier, 229-2766. Through May 28 and June 6, respectively. ANNE GORDON, mixed media, ARLENE HANSON, photography, and FOSTER SPERRY, paintings. Art Gallery of Barre, 476-1030. Through May, June 7 and-June 14, respectively. FORMATIVE EXPERIENCES, fea turing new sculpture by Kathryn Wysockey-Johnson and Lauren Cole, and work by the faculty. Vermont Clay Studio, Waterbury, 244-1126. Through May. HEAD START ART, featuring art work by children, parents and staff at CVCAC. Kellogg-Hubbard Library, Childrens Room, M ont pelier, 223-1227. Through May 30. RECENT M0N0PRINTS by Deborah Fillion, Poppy Gall and Heidemarie Heiss Holmes. Horn of the Moon Cafe, Montpelier, 223-2895. Through May 16. HEATON WOODS ART, featuring artwork by participants in an intergenerational art program between Union Elementary School and Heaton Woods. Berlin Mall, Berlin, 223-1157: Through May 28. SON AND EARTH, works in mixed media by Sally Keefe, Michael Heffernan, Elizabeth Nelson, Matt Anderson and Melinda W hite. Chaffee Center for the Visual Arts, Rutland, 775-0356. Through May 23. THE CARVING STUDIO AND SCULPTURE CENTER ANNUAL

MEMBERS SHOW, featuring work in many styles. Smaller works and two-dimensional art in the Chaffee Center, Rutland; larger works installed at the Carving Studio, West Rutland, 438-2097. Through May 23.

FORESTS AND FIELDS, HILLS AND HOMES: 19th-Century

Vermont Scenes by the Robinson Family, featuring pastoral land- '.' scapes by Rowland E. Robinson and his daughter Rachael Robinson Elmer. Sheldon Museum, Middlebury, 388-2117. Through July. JIM RICHMOND, 35 years of figu rative paintings and studies of peo ple and animals. Supreme Court Building, Montpelier, 828-$f?8. Through May 7. THE BIG PICTURE, featuring largeformat photography from European and American artists. Middlebury College Museum of Art, 443-2069. Through August 1. BLOWING IN THE WIND, showcas ing Vermont-made whirlygigs, weathervanes, kites, windsocks and mobiles. Frog Hollow State Craft Center, Middlebury, 388-3177. Through May 24. GENERATION OF CHANGE: VER MONT, 1820-1850, featuring

artifacts and documents that examine how the state dealt with issues s u g L as slavery, temperance, religious diversity and more. Vermont Historical Society, Pavilion Building, Montpelier, 828-2291. Ongoing. FIFTEEN ARTISTS, TEN YEARS OF DIALOGUE, a group show of mixed

media by Vermont artists. T.W. Wood Gallery, Montpelier, 8288743. Through May 9. THE NAIVE SPIRIT, fine examples of folk art from the permanent collection. T.W. Wood Gallery, Montpelier, 828-8743. Through August 1. NO RTHERN

18TH ANNUAL STOWE STUDENT ART EXHIBIT, featuring artworks

by local elementary, middle and high school students. Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, 253-8358. Through May 29. ABRAHAM MCNULLY, 40 sculp tures creating one work, “Time Experienced.” Helen Day Art Center, Stowe, 253-8358. Through May 29. ELSEW H ERE

1999 SENIOR ART EXHIBIT, featuring works in mixed media by graduating seniors in Plattsburgh. Burke Gallery, Plattsburgh Art Museum, 518-564-2474. Through May 16. ON ALL FRONTS: Posters from the World Wars in the Dartmouth Collection, and SARAJEVO: RECENT WAR POSTERS, more than 100 original posters from World Wars I and II, and the siege o f Sarajevo. Hood Museum of Art, D artm outh College, Hanover, N .H ., 603-646-2426. Through July 4 . ®

PLEASE NOTE: Seven Days is unable to accommodate all o f the displays in our readership area, thus these listings must be restricted to exhibits in truly public viewing places. A rt in business offices, lobbies and private residences or studios, with occasional exceptions, will not be accepted.

B y K e v in J. K elley

tattered barn are lit by a sum mer sun that is also casting wavy shadows on the m ountain in the background. Apart from its skillful composition, w hat distinguishes this scene from postcard art is its vaguely eerie emptiness, reminiscent of Edward H oppers similarly still arjd sun-soaked spaces. Lucionis Vermont is curi ously devoid o f Vermonters. No figures appear in smaller oils such as “Red Silo” and

sk Vermonters to associate a name with the title of “state poet laureate,” and most will quickly think of Robert Frost. But how many of us can identify the artist whom Life magazine once designated “Vermont’s painter laureate?” W ho today, apart from art his torians, has even heard of Luigi Lucioni? Admittedly, he was not to American painting what Frost was to American poetry. But Lucioni does not deserve the obscurity into which he slowly sank during the closin decades of his long career. A precise draughts man and a master of texture and tone, the Italian-born artist painted several quin tessential Vermont "Vermont Farm," by Luigi Lucioni landscapes depicting “Vermont Farm,” both from rickety barns, rocky fields and 1941. A nd a lovely pair o f cloud-shadowed hills. The oils watercolors depicting a birch and watercolors produced at his grove in m orning and late after summer homes — first at noon is likewise devoid of Shelburne Farms and later in humans. Manchester — are beautifully Its not as though Lucioni expressive o f his hyper-realistic couldn’t paint people. O ne of yet poetic style. the best pieces in the Peters At one time, as Life's Gallery shows an athlete clad encomium suggests, Lucioni only in shorts and socks reclin was widely recognized as a lead ing American artist. H e won the ing on maroon sheets and brown pillows, his back and legs top prize in the Corcoran smoothly muscled. There’s also Biennial on four occasions, the Mili M onti,” a 1940s glamour last in 1949. And at age 32, he queen whose vermilion lipstick became the youngest painter and nail polish contrast garishly ever to have a canvas purchased by the M etropolitan Museum of with her coal-black hair and alabaster skin. Art. The rise o f Abstract Expressionism diminished Lucionis reputation in critical circles, however. By the 1950s and ’60s his work had come to be seen as old-fashioned, unad- ' venturous and academic. A show on display through mid-M ay at the Gerald Peters Gallery in M anhattan may mark the beginning o f a Lucioni revival. The largest exhibit o f his paintings since the painters death in 1988 will test the interest of an art market that in recent years has grown T hough anatomically con more respectful o f traditional vincing, Lucionis portraits portraits, still-lifes and land reveal little o f the sitter s charac scapes. ter. Ironically, his still-lifes are These 35 works, ranging in livelier than his figures. His price from $12,000 to $90,000, palette in paintings o f tabletop are representative o f Lucioni s objects is honeyed and buttery, interests, strengths and limita while the detailing o f vases, tions. In “Clouds Over . glasses and fruit testifies to die Equinox” (1935), the shows centerpiece, the surprisingly var exactitude o f his execution. Swirling draperies further high ied colors o f a broken fence and

light Lucionis classicist training and taste. “I try more arid more to cre ate reality w ith the simplest means and with all essential detail,” Lucioni wrote. “But I feel this should be part o f a design which I believe every canvas must primarily possess.” Born near M ilan in 1900, he was brought to New York at age 10, studying later at Cooper U nion and the National Academy o f Design. Receipt o f

a Tiffany Foundation Fellow ship in 1924 enabled him to receive further instruction in Italy and France. Lucioni began summering in Vermont in 1929 at the invi tation o f Mrs. J. W atson Webb, a board m em ber o f the M etro politan M useum. She had him installed in one o f the guest houses on her family’s Shel burne Farms estate. Ten years later, he bought an old house in M anchester and had an adjoin ing barn converted into a stu dio. Lucioni also spent time in Barre, drawn to the city’s Italian community. It was through his painting of a granite quarry, on display at the Brooklyn M usuem of . Art, that I first became aware of Lucioni. f Those who cannot get to the Upper East Side in the next two weeks have an ongoing opportunity to view Lucioni s w ork closer to home. Two o f his paintings are on exhibit at the Shelburne M useum, which also has a large collection o f prints by an artist w ho should be better rem em bered in a state he so lovingly re n d e re d .® 7

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game o f cat and mouse for awhile as they decide w hether to trust one another. At this point things get silly. T h e two con coct an unbelievable plan to steal a-price less mask together. T hen things get silli er. T h e plan calls for Jones to navigate her way across a gallery criss-crossed by laser beams. To help her practice, C onnery duplicates the paths o f these invisible beams by stringing red thread across one o f the larger rooms in his pri vate castle (that’s tight, private castle) and, over and over again, the audience is treated to slow, sum ptuous, caressing, alm ost salivating close-ups o f Jones’ tightly clad body as she bends over, slithMAY-DECEMBER M ORONS The larceny is the Only film. ers on her belly and lifts her long legs thing that's grand in Jon Am iel's lame caper skyward, wriggling her way across the room . I’ve got to give him credit: C onnery and ENTRAPMENT*1/2 com pany do some pioneering film w ork here. This I know its practically unpatriotic to knock ■ is probably the first picture outside o f the porn Sean Connery, but, I’m sorry, the guys becom ing industry to make such extensive use o f a crotcha burden. For awhile there I felt sorry for the old boy, the original Bond growing decrepit before our cam! T hen, ubelievably, things get sillier still. T he eyes. D oddering instead o f swaggering. M aking tw entysom ething beauty falls head over heels for one awful em barrassm ent after another. Nuisance the semicadaverous Scotsman. W hen she’s not movies like A Good M an In Africa, Dragonheart, sleeping in the nude right in front o f him , she’s Medicine M an and last years worst film, The getting him liquored up and wrestling w ith him Avengers. Now, though, w hat I feel isn’t pity but on the castle floor, sm othering C onnery w ith affrontery bordering on contem pt, because his lat audibly m oist smooches. A nd, if all that isn’t est may well be the worst film I have had to sit unbelievable enough, get this: C onnery gives her through this year. And, as it turns out, the actor is the cold shoulder. Forget the new Star Wars install hardly as he seemed — an aging icon down on his m ent — Hollywood fantasy isn’t likely to get far luck and forced to accept insipid roles in idiotic ther o ut than this in our lifetime. pictures. To the contrary, research reveals Connery Anyway, it all goes on and on, getting dum b to be a calculating opportunist m asterm inding a and dum ber, until the final heist leads to a con plot to squeeze every last cent possible from his frontation w ith police built around one o f the popularity through an onslaught o f pictures which goofiest stu n t sequences in cinem atic history. I are insipid and idiotic by design. had half a m ind to holler at the cops, “Let them C onnery is no innocent victim o f circum go as long as they promise never to come back.” stance. H e’s the founder o f Fountainbridge Films But back to my conspiracy theory: G enerated and executive producer o f Entrapment, w hich his from scratch by C onnery’s company, the picture com pany threw together w ith the cooperation of was directed by Jon Amiel, who gave us the several highly placed co-conspirators for the sole groundbreaking BBC series, “T he Singing purpose o f making a quick buck at the expense of D etective,” produced by the same people who the actor’s loyal fans. I’ll tell you why I’m so sure produced Local Hero, The Killing Fields, Blazing o f this in a m inute. But first the review: Saddles and Apollo 13, and w ritten by the same C onnery and Catherine ( The Mask ofZorro) person who wrote W hat Dreams M ay Come and Zeta-Jones both appear in the new film, b ut the Rain M an. You tell me: Is Entrapment really the indisputable star o f the picture is Jones’ body. T he best these aw ard-w inning industry veterans could story is a preposterous load o f laughable nonsense come up with? O r is it the w ork o f a callous about a raven-haired insurance investigator who Hollywood clique eager to parlay reputations into m ight or m ight not really be an international art an easy payday? thief and who embarks on an assignment to get M y advice, C onnery fans: T h e next tim e you the goods on another international art thief, who feel fhe lovable legend tugging at your heart m ight or m ight not be old enough to be her strings, make sure his other hand isn’t going for grandfather’s insurance investigator. your wallet or your purse. ® Jones and C onnery play a dull, redundant

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NICKELODEON C IN E M A S

ETHAN ALLEN CIN EM AS 4 North Avenue, Burlington, 863-6040. A Simple Plan 5:10, 9:50. EdTV 12:15, 2:45, 7:30. Saving Private Ryan 12:45, 4:15, 8. 8MM 3:30, 9:30. She's All That 12:30, 2:30, 4:30, 6:45, 9. True Crime 1, 7. Eve shows daily, matinees Sat-Sun unless otherwise indicated.

CINEM A NINE Shelburne Road, S. Burlington, 864-5610 The Mummy* 12:30, 3:20, 6:50, 9:35. Entrapment 12, 2:30, 5, 7:25, 9:50. Idle Hands 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:30, 10. Life 12:45, 3:45, 7:20, 9:55. Lost and Found 12:10, 2:35, 4:55, 7:15, 9:35. Pushing Tin 12:50, 3:40, 6:40, 9:40. 10 Things I Hate About You 7:10, 9:25. Matrix 12:40, 3:30, 6:30, 9:30. Never Been Kissed 12, 2:25, 4:50, 7:15, 9:45. Doug's First Movie 12:25, 2:40, 4:40. All shows daily.

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- ^page 38

SEVEN DAYS

may 5f 1999

College Street, Burlington, 863-9515. Election* 1:10, 3:30, 7:10, 9:40. Cookie's Fortune 1:30, 4, 7, 9:30. Gods And Monsters 1:50, 4:20, 6:50, 9:10. Analyze This 1:40, 4:10, 7:20, 9:50. Shakespeare in Love 1:20, 3:50, 6;40, 9:20. Life is Beautiful 1, 3:40, 6:30, 9. All shows daily.

THE SAVOY Main Street, Montpelier, 229-0509. The General 6:30, 9.

Films at the following theaters are not available at press time. Please call for info.

SU N SET d r i v e - in Colchester, 862-1800. CAPITOL THEATRE

93 State Street, Montpelier,

229-0343.

PARAMOUNT THEATRE

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5 Williston Road, S. Bulington, 863-4494. The Mummy* 1, 3:40, 7,

253-4678.

Baggy Knees Shopping Center, Stowe,

9:25. Entrapment 12:50, 3:20, 6:50, 9:30. Go 7:15, 9:35.

MAD RIVER FLICK

Matrix 12:40, 3:30, 6:40, 9:20. Never Been Kissed 1:20, 3:35, 7:10, 9:40. Doug's First Movie 1:15, 3:15. All shows Sat/Sun.

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Route 1 0 0 , Waitsfield, 496-4200. Main Street, Middlebury,

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F iL M Q u IZ cosponsored by Video W orld Superstore

previews THE M UM M Y I ’ll tell you w hy I ’m glad this has finally gotten to town: I ’m sick o f sitting through its trailer every tim e I go to a movie. As we all know by now, B rendan Fraser stars in this effects-heavy rem ake o f the horro r classic. S tephen Som m ers directs. Rachel W eisz co-stars. ELECTION From A lexander Payne, director o f C itizen R uth , comes this com edy ab o u t a high

school teacher (M atthew Broderick) w hose life is taken over by a student-council race. W ith Reese W itherspoon.

n e w .. on video BABE: PIG IN THE CITY*** Everybody’s favorite ham is back and, in this sequel to the 1995 Best Picture nom inee, he leaves the farm for a taste o f city life.

M agda Szubanski and James C rom w ell co-star. George M iller directs. (G) YOU'VE GOT M A IL** 1/2 Look for lots o f Sleepless in Seattle fans to w ait on line for tickets to this Tom H anks-M eg Ryan reunion from the very same screenwriter. T h e two fall for one another in an In tern et chat room while oblivious to the fact th at they are business rivals in the n o n virtual w orld. G reg K innear costars. N ora E phron directs. (PG)

shorts rating scale: * — PUSHING TIN** Jo h n Cusack

*****

and Billy Bob T h o rn to n play rival air traffic controllers in the latest com edy from M ike Newell, director o f Four Weddings and a Funeral W ith Cate B lanchett and A ngelina Jolie. (R) THE GENERAL*** John {Deliverance) B oorm ans new film tells th e tru e story o f the late D u b lin crim e boss M artin Cahill, a figure as fam ous for his charism a as for his ruthlessness. Brendan G leeson an d Jo n V oight star. (R) IDLE HANDS’ * 1' 2 D evon Sawa stars in this horror-com e- ; dy com bo a b o u t a 17-year-old whose right h a n d develops a m ind o f its ow n. R odm an Flender directs. LIFE* Two cons grow old b ehind bars an d share a few — very few — • laughs along the way in th e latest from E ddie M urphy. M a rtin Lawrence costars. Ted D em m e directs. (R) LOST & FOUND** 1 /2 D avid Spade stars here as a lovestruck i

T PU M P

NR = not reviewed

W ith Laurence Fishburn. Larry and A ndy W achowski direct. (R)

TEN THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU** 1/2 You’d never guess it by looking at o u r m ean I.Q . scores, b u t we re apparendy a n atio n o f rabid Shakespeare fanatics. First there was that Best Picture Oscar. N ow The Taming o f the Shrew gets updated as th e story o f a popular sophom ore w ho’s forbidden to have a boyfriends until her older sister gets one, too. Julia Stiles an d Larisa O leynik star. (PG -13)

DOUG'S FIRST M OVIE**1/2 H e ’s the hardest w orking ’toon in-show business. H is popular h alf-hour show appears o n b oth T h e N ickelodeon C hannel and A BC. N ow he makes the leap to th e big screen w ith this fu llM aurice Joyce. Featuring the vocal stylings o f Billy W est an d Fred N ew m an. (G)

NEVER BEEN KISSED***

camps by pretending the whole things an elaborate contest w ith great prizes. (PG-13)

SAVING PRIVATE RYAN*** Steven Spielbergs W W II youare-here effects-fest d id a decent to u r o f duty at the G olden G lobe and Academy awards. (R) A SIMPLE PLAN**** H orror vet Sam Raimi directs this darkish saga concerning two brothers w ho find $4 m illion in a dow ned plane and a heap o f trouble w hen they atte m p t to take o ff w ith the money. W ith Bill Paxton, Billy Bob T h o rn to n and Bridget Fonda. (R) EDTV*** Surprisingly enough, Ron H ow ard’s new real life-asT V com edy isn’t based on The Truman Show, b u t rather an obscure 1994 C anadian picture called Louis XIX: King o f the Airwaves. N o t th at it m atters, since everyone on E arth is going to com pare it to Peter W eir’s movie, anyway. M atthew . M cC onaughey stars in the role o fT ru .. I m ean E d. (PG -13) 8 M M * * 1/2 W ritten b y A e guy behind Seven . by 'own) Schumacher* th e latest Nicolas Cage p r o m i s ^ | 3l in to 'th e dark side as e actor p k p r a detective ng th e m akers o f a grisly n rri w r i t • srtufffilm .rWid> Joaquin |

ro ll r e c a l l Yes, the face is familiar, but can you place the movie in which the above performer played each of the characters show n?

For more film fun don’t forget to watch "Art Patrol" every Thursday and Friday on News Channel 5!

LAST WEEK'S ANSWERS: 1. DREW BARRYM ORE 2. ANNE HECHE 3. GWYNETH PALTROW 4. JENNIFER ANISTON 5. M A R IS A TOMEI 6. NICOLE KIDM AN

DEADLINE: MONDAY • PRIZES: I0 PAIRS OF FREE PASSES PER WEEK, 3 GIFT CERTIFICATES GOOD FOR A FREE RENTAL AT THE BURLINGTON VIDEO WORLD SEND ENTRIES TO: FILM Q U IZ PO BO X 68, W ILLISTO N , VT 05495

OR E -M A IL TO ullrfn p rd @ ao l.co m . BE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR ADDRESS. PLEASE ALLOW FOUR - SIX WEEKS FOR DELIVERY OF PRIZES. Sy u o y o DanG»l 6

sinee.LM a's T he dative shoestring, the picture b o a ^ (jig-ticket talent like Liv Tyler, G len n Close, julianne M oore an d C hris

~\ iest * -1 can tu rn thL eg eek girl

directs t f e w i ^ y praised look a t w hat the early years o f the b a rd s career and love life m ight

cam pus (Rachael JLeigh Cook) in to th e n ex t p ro m queen. w -, . p ,„ , 2 T

O ’D onnell, a n d concerns a feeding frenzy th a t breaks o u t between the beneficiaries o f an

have been like. Joseph Fiennes an d G w yneth Paltrow star. (R)

t o iif ' c RIM E***!/2

LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL*****

rii ‘ KUt UKIMtU m Eastwood directs and stars in

eccentric w idow s will. (P G -13) THE M ATRIX***1/2 U nfazed 3y the box office floppage o f its last sci-fi effectsfest {Johnny Mnemonic), K eanu Reeves does the futuristic th in g again in this digital free-for-all ab o u t terrorists who b atd e evil com puters.

R oberto B enigni’s H olocaust com edy tp o k th e G rand Jury Prize at this year’s C annes festival. In additio n to directing a n d co-w riting, he also stars as an Italian-Jew ish father w ho tries to shield his son from the tru th ab o u t concentration

this adaptation o f the 1997 best-seller by A ndrew Klavan ab o u t a dow n-and-out reporter in a race against the clock to save, the life o f a death-row inm ate he believes is innocent. W ith James W oods and Isaiah W ashington. (R) WWW. TNOVfftfTOWW. Com

may 5,1999

SEVEN DAYS

page 39

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deadline: monday, 5 pm • phone 8 0 2 .8 6 4 ;5 6 8 4 • fax 8 0 2 .8 6 5 .1 0 1 5 L IN E ADS: 25 words for $7. Over 25 words: 300 a word. Longer running ads are discounted. Ads must be prepaid. D ISP LA Y ADS: $13 per col. inch. Group buys for employment display ads are available with the Addison Independent, the St. Albans Messenger, the Milton Independent and the Essex Reporter. Call for more details. V ISA and M A ST E R C A R D accepted. And cash, of course.

EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT ADM INISTRATIVE ASSISTANT: VT Cares seeks highly motivat ed, self-directed, organized individual to provide adminis trative support for the manage ment team, answer phones, maintain files, bookkeeping, assist in the development of community events, foundation and grant research. Computer skills are a necessity. Send let ter and resume to: PO Box 5248, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 2 , or email joanz@vtcares.org.

ADM INISTRATIVE ASSISTANT/ COM M U NITY ORGANIZER: The Peace & Justice Center seeks an administrative assistant/community organizer for 2 4 hrs./wk. Self-motivated, organized, and strong communication and com puter skills. 1-3 yrs. related experience in administrative support and/or community orga nizing on peace & justice issues. Send resume by May 12 to 21 Church St., Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 1 . The PJC is an equal opportunity employer.

ARCHITECTS/DRAFTSPERSONS: Design-oriented firm seeks 2 individuals for Burlington/Warren locations. Construction document experi ence required. CAD skills desired. Edgcomb Design Group, 80 2-496 -5 26 6.

BOOKSTORE HELP: Part-time, 18-20 hrs./wk., some eves, weekends. Used book experi ence preferred, but will, train right person. Potential for more hours. Send resume to: Books, PO Box 8423, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 2 -8 4 2 3 .

ARE YOU FASHION CON SCIO U S and love fun, comfort able, natural-fiber clothing? If so, how about joining the team at Clay’s? We’re looking for motivated and outgoing team players for sales positions with room for growth & advance ment. Call 8 7 9 -0 2 1 2 xl.

CHILDCARE: Full-time summer, poss. 15-20 part-time hrs. in fall. Responsible, caring, ener getic provider needed for sweet lO-yr.-old girl. Great position for college student. So. Burlington. Own car, good dri ving record, non-smoker, refer ences. Call 8 6 3-043 9.

CU STOM ER SERVICE R E P R E SENTATIVE: Adventurous Traveler Bookstore. Part-time position (2 0-25 hrs.) in growing mail-order company. Must have strong interest in the outdoors. Extensive phone work and data entry reqjjired, retail experience helpful. Send resume to Attn.: Alex Messinger, PO Box 64 76 9, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 6 . 86 0 -6 7 7 6 .

CUSTODIAN HELP WANTED: Town of Shelburne. Gen. custo dial services in several town buildings; occasional light repair & maintenance responsi bilities. Temporary, full-time position. Mechanical aptitude a plus. Must be able to lift up to 50 lbs. occasionally and to work independently. Clear VT driver's license required. Call 9 8 5 -5 1 1 0 or stop in the Town Manager's office for application & additional info. EOE.

Are you graduating from college this spring;

Northeastern Family Institute

How-about a career in television advertising salest

N o rtheastern Fam ily institute, an expanding statew ide p ro vider of m ental health treat m ent services for children, adolescents and families, is seeking a DIRECTOR for its COMMUNITY BASED SERVICES PROGRAM. Experienced person sought for a w ell established, innovative, intensive treatm ent pro gram providing w rap-around, therapeutic foster care an d specialized services. Responsibilities include all adm inis trative, fiscal an d clinical m anagem ent. C andidates m u st possess a m asters degree an d three years experience in a clinical adm inistrative position. Licensed candidates are preferred. Please send resum es to M ichelle Willis, NFI, P.O. Box 1415, Williston, VT 05495, 802-879-6197 fax.

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Liquid Energy is locking \}cr e n th u sia stic a n d resp o n sib le Cashiers a n d Liquid Technicians. S u p erviso r p o si tio n s a va ila b le. Please call 8 6 c-sm ccth ie. 57 Church St.

a g l io z z i

CHECK EXHAUST SYSTEM FOR CLUNKING SOUND Dear Tom and Ray, I recently purchased a 1 996 Dodge Caravan SE. I really enjoy it, b u t am wondering about a thudding noise that sounds a little like a dead body rolling around in the back o f the van every tim e I accelerate quickly. I asked my neighbor about it, and he says his Caravan makes the same exact noise. H e thinks it's a design glitch. The spare tire seems secure, a n d neither one o f us works fo r the M afia. W hat's up? — Barb T O M : A w o rd o f advice, Barb. Leave th e M afia jokes to us. W e're already in the W itness P ro tectio n Program . RAY: You m ean th e W IT less

p ro tectio n program . T O M : T h e m ost likely cause o f y o u r noise is a loose piece o f th e exhaust pipe h ittin g the floor, the right rear shock absorber, the leaf spring or som eth in g else in the back. W h e n you accelerate, you change the angle o f the chassis relative to the ground, and th at cou ld cause a loose or im prop erly installed exhaust pipe to h it som ething and m ake a "bub u m " noise. RAY: O f course it's also possi ble th a t the noise is due to C hrysler's top-secret Caravan Recycling A u to m atio n Program , often referred to by its acronym . T O M : O u r theory is th a t as p a rt o f this innovative pro gram , im m ediately after deliv ery th e vehicle's parts begin to loosen up by themselves as you drive aro u n d. A n d w hile m any ow ners th in k these are design flaws o r m echanical problem s,

Volunteers Needed

June 7-13 Great music! Free T-shirt! Join the party! c a ll L a u ra at

8 6 3 -7 9 9 2

we believe they're actually part o f a carefully th o u g h t o u t plan to make the Caravan easier to recycle at the end o f its life. RAY: B ut if you d o n 't buy that, have your m echanic check the exhaust system, Barb. You'll probably find the source o f the noise there.

Dear Tom and Ray, Regarding Y2K, what prob lems can we anticipate w ith cur rent models? W hat about older cars? — Tony T O M : As far as we know, there's absolutely n o thing to w orry about. O f course, I'm spending the fall getting m y Schw inn tu n ed up just in case. RAY: W e've checked w ith all o f the m anufacturers, and all o f them claim th at Y2K problem s will have no effect on any o f their cars. W e can 't verify this, b u t it makes sense. T here are really no date-dependent func tions in autom otive com puters, w hich are the functions m ost likely to be affected by Y2K problem s.

WBVT seeks two motivated Account Executives to sell for such programs as Dilbert, Star Trek Voyager, Martha Stewart and Red Sox Baseball. Use your sales, customer service or media background to prospect and develop accounts in Greater Burlington. We offer a guaranteed base salary plus commission for this full-time position. Tell us why you are the person we need - send a cover letter and your resume to WBVT Sales Coordinator.

29 Church Street, Suite 9, Burlington, VT 05401 802-660-0036

T O M : W ait a m inute, I just th o u g h t o f one! W h a t about cars th at display th e date on the dashboard? Like D ad 's ’85 Chrysler N ew Yorker? O n N ew Year's Day, do you th in k his dashboard is going to read Jan. 1, 1990? RAY: I d o n 't know. B ut now I know w here we ll be spending N ew Year's Eve:?Tn D ad 's car! W atch this space for a com plete report in January.

How can you tell i f a used car is in good condition— or even OK, fo r that matter? F ind out by ordering Tom and Ray's pam phlet "How to Buy a Great Used Car: Things That D etroit and Tokyo D on't W ant You to Know. " Send $3 and a stamped (55 cents), self-addressed, No. 10 envelope to Used Car, PO Box 6420, Riverton, N J 080776420.

Cooks

Burlington.

AGENCY C O O R D IN A T O R - Consensus builder Problem solver - Motivator to provide feminist leadership to domestic-violence agency and shelter. Responsibilities include resource develop ment, strategic planning, personnel man agement, community relations. Desired: BA/BS+5yrs (MA/MS+3yrs) management and supervisory experience in social service agency. Cover letter and resume to W H BW , P.O. Box 1535. Burlington, V I

Got a question about cars? Write to Click and Clack in care o f this newspaper, or em ail them by visiting the Car Talk section o f cars.com on the World Wide Web.

0S402. Call 658-3131 for details. E O E . people of color, lesbians, people with disabilities S formerly battered women encouraged to apply.

Women Helping Battered Women

please note: refunds cannot be granted for any reason, adjustments will be credited to the advertiser’s account toward future classifieds placement only, we proofread carefully, but even so mistakes can occur, report errors at once, as seven days will not be responsible for errors continuing beyond the first printing, adjustment for error is lirnited to ^publication, in any event, liability for errors (or omissions) shall not exceed the cost of the space occupied by such an error (or omission), all advertising is subject to review by seven days, seven days reserves the right to edit, properly categorize or decline any ad without comment or appeal. ...............

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SEVEN DAYS

may 5,1999

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Classifieds • 864.5684 EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EMPLOYMENT EDUCATION OUTREACH COORDINATOR: The Women’s Rape Crisis Center, a feminist non-profit agency, seeks a full time Education Outreach Coordinator. Candidates must have education and outreach experience with different age groups and diverse populations. Volunteer management, training and facilitation skills are neces sary, as well as knowledge of sexual assault issues and issues of oppression. Knowledge of cooperative agency structures and a multi-cultural perspective preferred. Energetic candidates are asked to send resume, a let ter of interest and a writing sample by May 15, 1 9 9 to: W RCC Hiring Committee, PO Box 92, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 2 . Women from underserved popu lations are encouraged to apply. FARM H O U SE C H E E SE MAKER: Organization with envi ronmental mission seeks full time individuals until year’s end. Make, cut, wax, wrap & ship. Apply to Ross Gagnon, Shelburne Farms, Shelburne, VT 0 5 4 8 2 . FINE HANDCRAFTS S U R ROUND you at Shimmering Glass & Stowe Craft. Be part of it. Join our team. Opportunities for a salesperson, design center manager and a stained-glass artist. Required experience with art, craft, interior design or retail. Write Stowe Craft, 55 Mountain Rd., Stowe, VT 0 5 6 7 2 . Fax 2 5 3 -8 1 0 9 , or email sfish l23 0@ ao l.com .

FOOD RREP/DISH: Earn & learn with our quality team. Real life experience or will train. Pauline’s, 1 8 3 4 Shelburne Rd., Shelburne. GEN ERA L MANAGER: Otter Creek Food Co-op is seeking full-time store management of a newly formed cooperative. Applicant must have experience in natural foods cooperative retail setting. Supervisory & customer service skills a must. Work with an active board, com mitted membership & staff to help shape & implement our vision for our co-op. Resume to: OCFC, PO Box 359, Vergennes, VT 0 5 4 9 1 . GREAT OPPORTUNITY! Books Are Fun, the Nation’s leading display marketer of Quality books at Discounted prices is looking for an entrepreneurial individual. This is an Opportunity for an Independent contractor to be successful with a great company to back you! The right person will develop a territory in the Burlington area of repeat accounts in the Early Childhood market. Need to be a self-starter, energetic, with a "get-it-done” attitude. Van, computer, storage space are necessary. Visit our Web site at www.booksarefun.com. Fax resume to 1-8 8 8 -4 7 6 -7 8 1 2 , or call 1 -8 0 0 -9 6 6 -8 3 0 1 x2 6 4 6 for an info pack.

EXPERIENCED WRITER In t e r n e t C o . s e e k s

p r o f e s s io n a l

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:}> STRONG ANALYTICAL ABILITIES • * THOROUGH KNOWLEDGE OF THE INTERNET Roplg (€«moil only) by Moy 17 with cover letter, resume, 800-word writing sample, and contact fafarmatioft for 3 professional references to: engroff@togetiher.net

Straight

Dear Cecil, A few years back, in your book M ore o f the Straight Dope, you repeated the story that vampire legends might have been based on victims o f the disease porphyria, which causes disfigurement and is a result o f certain blood defi ciencies. This hypothesis was invented by a biochemist named D avid Dolphin. It doesn’t hold up under scientific scrutiny, since drinking blood doesn’t actually bring victims any relief, nor do victims crave blood since they don’t intu itively know they have a blood deficiency (it was not known that that caused the disease until relatively recently). However, the story has become very popular and has caused untold suffering fo r victims o f porphyria, who have been branded “vampires”and taunted because o f it. You might

INTERNET C O M M ERCE TEAM seeks active, outdoors, creative, quirky indiv. w/ HTML, Windows, Mac, networking & retail exp. to assist in rapidly growing internet & catalog busi ness. F/T, salary/benefits. Replies to Kent, Outdoor Gear Exchange, 191 Bank St., Burlington, VT 0 5 40 1. em ploy-. ment@gearx.com. KITCHEN STAFF: Experienced line cooks & prep cooks wanted for hi-volume, quality-conscious kitchen position. Must be fast, even-tempered, reliable team player. Min. 2-yrs. experience. Send resume to or stop by in person to VT Pub & Brewery, 1 4 4 College St., Burlington, VT 05401. LIVE-IN CAREGIVER: Female, Tues.-Fri., some nursing experi ence to work with stroke patient. Pleasant Williston set ting. Salary + private room & board. 8 7 2 -2 7 3 8 , leave mes sage. M A CH IN E OPERATOR WANTED with at least 3-yrs. experience to operate industrial machinery, including a waterjet cutter & CNC router. We will train the motivated, mechanically-apt candidate. Call Don, Alchemy Studios, 6 5 5-625 1. MANUFACTURING/WAREHOUSE: Disassemble/reassemble toner cartridges, shipping, receiving, stocking shelves. Must have good mechanical skills, fast learner. Good pay/benefits. Resume to: PO Box 878, Williston, VT 05 49 5. NEW RESTAURANT on Shelburne Rd. Experienced cooks and servers. 2 -yrs. mini mum experience. Will pay. Apply in person between 12-4, M-F at What’s Your Beef, 1 7 10 Shelburne Rd. No phone calls, please. ONION RIVER CO-OP S E E K S organized, hard-working candi date to join our perishables team. Responsibilities include stocking, receiving, and cus tomer service. Must be able to lift 50 lbs. Onion River Co-op offers medical insurance, paid time off and employee dis counts. Applications available at our store, 2 7 4 N. Winooski Ave., Burlington.

OUTDOOR JOBS! VYCC is hir ing Crew Members ages 16-24 to build trails, restore streams, and manage parks. Positions available spring, summer and fall. Info, session & interviews Tuesday May 11, 6 p.m. Contois Auditorium, Burlington. 1-800-639-VYCC.

PROGRAM ASSISTANT: Intervale Compost, program of the non-profit Intervale Foundation, is seeking a parttime assistant to provide administrative & general sup port. Excellent organizational skills & ability to handle multi ple tasks. 6 6 0 -4 9 4 9 for info.

UNDERH ILL to BURLINGTON: I am looking for a ride to work MF, 8:30 to 5. (3055)

im e c tio n

BARRE to BURLINGTON. I am a student looking for a ride M,W,F, 8 a.m. Flex, return. (3051)

Call 864-CCTA to respond to a

listing or to be listed. ESSEX to BURLINGTON: I am looking for a ride to UHC. I work 3 to 11:30, M-F and alternate weekends. (3146)

BURLINGTON to MONTPELIER: I am looking for a ride to the National Life Building. My hours are 8 to 5, M-F. (3072)

HUNTINGTON to IBM: I work the first shift and am looking to catch a ride to work with some one M-F. (3140)

BURLINGTON to WINOOSKI: I am looking for a ride one way to work, M-F. I have to be in by 7 a.m. (3070)

UNDERHILL/RICHMOND to MIDDLEBURY: Going my way? I would like to share the ride to and from work. My hours are 8:30 to 5 p.m., M-F. (3142)

SO. BURLINGTON to TAFTS CORNERS: I am looking for a ride to work, M-F, for a few months. My hours are 9 to 5. (3068)

BRISTOL to BURLINGTON: I would like to share driving to work to cut down on the wear and tear on my car. I work 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., M-F. (3131)

STOWE to ESSEX JCT.: I work in the Outlet Fair area and am looking for a ride. My schedule is very flexible and includes weekends. (3077)

LINCOLN/BRISTOL to SO. BURLINGTON: I’m looking to share driving 4 days/wk. My hrs. are 8:30 to 5 p.m. (3126)

BURLINGTON to BRISTOL: I am looking for a ride to work. My hours are 7 to 4, M-F. (3067)

JOHNSON to BURLINGTON: I am a student looking for a ride to school M-F, 8 to 4. I really need a ride TO school, I could arrange for a ride home if neces sary. (3102)

SO. BURLINGTON to MONTPE LIER: I am looking to share dri ving with someone. I work M, Tu, W, F, 8:30 to 4:30. I would be willing to meet at the Richmond P&R. (3050)

SO. BURLINGTON to IBM: I am looking for a ride to work, I am on the 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. shift with rotating days. (3090)

BURLINGTON to MONKTON: I am looking for a ride to work for a few weeks. My hours are 7:30 to 4:00, M-F with some flexibili ty. (3063)

MILTON to COLCHESTER: I am looking for a ride to work. I could meet at the Chimney Corners Park & Ride. My hours are 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Tues.Sat. w/ some flexibility. (3095) ESSEX JCTVBURL. to ST. ALBANS: I am looking for a ride to work. My hours are 6 a.m. to 5 p.m., M-F with flexible evening hours. (3088)

want to address this in your column when you’ve got the time. — Ed Heil, Okemos, M I I could try to weasel on this one, but I may as well fess up. I failed to check out this story before sticking it in my book. (Hey, the guy was m aking a speech to a sci entific society! It was reported in The New York TimeA) As a result I was taken in by an explanation that was superficially plausible but on examination turned out to be complete crap. In 1985 biochemist David D olphin proposed that the vampires o f folklore may actually have been people suffering from porphyria, a group o f rare, largely heredi tary blood diseases. According to the Times account o f his remarks: (1) Porphyria victims are extraordinarily sensitive to sunlight. Even mild exposure can cause severe disfigure ment. Facial skin may scar, the nose and fingers may fall off, and the lips and gums may become so taut that the teeth project like fangs. (2) To avoid sunlight, people w ith serious cases o f por phyria go out only at night, just like Dracula. (3) Today porphyria can be treated w ith injections o f blood products. Centuries ago, porphyria victims m ight have sought to treat themselves by drinking blood. (4) Porphyria is inherited, but the symptoms may not manifest themselves until brought on by stress. Suppose a sibling w ith an active case o f the disease bites you to quench his thirst for blood. Trh stressful, non? Suddenly your own latent porphyria goes critical and you start growing fangs, too. (5) Garlic contains a chemical that worsens porphyria symptoms, causing sufferers to avoid it. Just like vam pires. Great story, eh? T he media, including me, went nuts, and today everybody “knows” that porphyria patients are vampires — to the distress o f people who

RETAIL FLOWER & BED D ING plant salespeople wanted: Starts May 1st. Full- & parttime positions. Flower & garden enthusiasts encouraged to apply. Call Oakwood Farms, Essex Ctr., 4 3 4 -5 1 0 1 Leave message.

MIDDLEBURY/BURL./SO. BURL, to BARRE: I am looking to share driving to work. Willing to meet half-way, preferrably on Rte. 7. Hours are 8 to 5, M-F. (3057) RICHMOND to ESSEX JUNC TION: I am looking for a ride to work M-F, generally 9 to 5, but can be very flexible. (3059)

H IN ESBU RG to BURLINGTON. I am looking for a ride to the UMall M-F, 9:30 a.m. (3040) GRAND ISLE to BURLINGTON. I’m looking to share driving on a smoke-free commute to work. Hours are M-F, 9 to 6 , some flex. (3038) SO. BURLINGTON to MILTON. I am working on a house in Milton for a month and seeking a ride to the site M-F at 7 a.m. (3036) M IDDLEBURY to BURLINGTON. I’m a working student looking for a ride Tues. or Weds, to Burl./ returning Fri. or Sat. eve to Middlebury. (3035) MO RRISVILLE to WILLISTON. I’m looking to share driving on my trek to work. Hours are M-F, 8 to 4:30. (2997)

VANPOOLR Route from: Burlington and the

Richmond Commuter Lot To: Montpelier Monthly Fare: $85 Work Hours: 7:30 to 4 2 5 p.m. Contact: Carl Bohlen Phone: 828-5215

V fe rm o n t# ^ ^

P id e s h a re

actually have these diseases. Just one problem. People w ith porphyria aren’t vam pires, and there’s no reason to think that the vampires o f folklore had the disease — or existed at all. To respond point by point: (1) Porphyria comprises seven separate disorders. Skin problems are a fairly com m on sym ptom , b u t only the rarest form — congenital erythropoietic porphyria — causes severe disfigurement. Just 200 cases o f this disease have been diagnosed, surely too few to account for the widespread belief in vampires. In any case, alleged vam pires exhum ed in the 18th century typically weren’t dis figured, b ut appeared as they had in life (well, sort of). (2) T he idea that vampires abhor sunlight was an inven tion o f fiction writers. In Europe during the 18th and 19th. centuries, vampires were sometimes reported to have been sighted during the day. Bram Stoker’s Dracula was deathly pale, b ut folkloric vampires, in the Balkans, anyway, were said to be ruddy-faced due to blood con sum ption. (3) Porphyria victims don’t crave blood. D rinking blood will not alleviate their sym ptom s, nor has there ever been a general belief that it would. T he blood chemicals porphyria victims need do not survive digestion. (4) In light o f the preceding, the scenario described in point #4 above is unlikely. (5) N o one has proved that garlic worsens porphyria. Professor D olphin never published a formal paper describing his theory. W hen I phoned, he didn’t wish to speak to me and w ould say only that “it was just specu lation” and that “I haven’t w orked in this area for m any years.” T he practice o f trying to m atch diseases w ith wellknown figures in history or folklore has a long and not entirely reputable history. (Porphyria, for one, has also been blamed for werewolves.) M aybe next tim e we’ll know better. — C E C IL A D A M S ®

may 5,1999

SEVEN DAYS

page 41

Classifieds • 864.5684 EMPLOYMENT

RED MEAT

RVS N E E D S YOU! Local call Center seeking several individu als with excellent phone skills for a variety of projects. Flexible hours and excellent pay plus bonuses. 8 7 2 -8 1 3 0 .

from the se cre t file s of

the m ellifluous m ilk o f m o n o to n y

Hmm...mouth Is dry, can’t feel my tongue, blurred vision, hands and legs are numb, I just went to the bathroom in m y pants, and now I’m seeing lightning bolts coming out of m y cardigan buttons.

SC R E E N PR IN T ER WANTED for busy shop. Applicants must have 2 yrs. experience printing on a wide variety of substrates, with knowledge of reclamation, color matching & screen prepa ration (this is NOT a T-shirt printing position). Call Don, Alchemy Studios, 6556251.

jM Q X

G C jO n Q

No wonder you’re not supposed to drink furniture polish. _ - 7

-----------------------------^

S K ILL E D LABO RER W ANTED for busy fabrication facility. Must be experienced with a wide variety of metal & wood working equip., dependable team player. Call Don, Alchemy Studios, 6 5 5 -6 2 5 1 . S U M M E R EMPLOYMENT: Vermont Expos are looking for responsible individuals to work part-time for the 1 9 9 9 baseball season. Please call 6 5 5 -4 2 0 0 for more information.

OFFICE/ BUSySTUDIO SPACE

S U M M E R JOBS! Literacy, kids, fun. AmeriCorps*VISTA. Call 8 6 5 -7 1 8 5 .

VOLUNTEERS WANTED

BU RLINGTON: 2 0 8 Flynn, near Oakledge Park. Brick factory transforming...studio/ office/fitness/cafe/etc. Ready for custom fit-up. Contact David, 9 8 5 2 3 9 1 or FLYN N208@together.net.

Y2K PU BLIC EDUCATION S E R IE S Publicity Volunteers Needed: Chittenden County, May 7, 8 , 14 and/or 15. Sponsors: City of Burlington, UVM, SB A. Contact: John Olson, City Hall, 8 6 5 -7 2 0 0 .

APT7H 0USE FOR RENT

ANNOUNCE MENTS UNLOCK YOUR NATURAL D E SIR E TO EXERCISE, untan gle from stress, energize your body and attain your ideal body weight! A fun, no struggle work shop, learning powerful tech niques combining Self-hypno sis, NLP, Reiki, Congruent Affirmations, Aromatherapy and Guided Imagery. Thursday Evenings from 6 :3 0 -8 :3 0 p.m., May 6 through May 2 7 at the Shelburne Athletic Club. Led by VT’s Personal Health Coach, Tod Backe, R M T and Certified Hypnotherapist, Victoria Catani, CHt, RMT, Co-founders of Essential Symmetry. Space is limited! Register Early! Complete course only $1 29 . Sign up by April 2 6 for just $99. To register or for more details, phone 6 5 1 -7 6 6 6 , or email healing@together.net. 10 % of proceeds donated to Make A Wish Foundation.

HOUSEMATES HOUSEMATES c o m p u t e r " SERVICES WANTED WANTED

BURLINGTON: Furnished rooms in guest house, down town, shared common areas, phone parking, no smoking, newly renovated. Clean, quiet, responsible only. Weekly & monthly rates. 8 6 2-334 1.

BURLINGTON: So. End., seek ing young, prof, roommate for 1-bdrm. in 3-bdrm. house, Ig. yard & garden. Sm oking OK. $300/mo. + 1/3 utils. 8 6 42 4 6 9 (eves.).

UNIQUE LIVING OPP. FREE RENT! 25-yr.-old man seeks roommate to provide advice and share interests such as exercising, games and movies. Free rent in Burlington apt. provided in exchange. Contact Katherine Long, 6 5 81 9 1 4 for info. EEO/TTY.

BURLINGTON: 2-bdrm. apt., centrally located on King St., near Church St. Heat & water incl. Well-maintained. Avail. 5/15. $800/mo. + dep. 6 6 0 -4 3 4 7 .

VERM O NT EXPOS A RE IN need of people to house players for the 1 9 9 9 season. Please call 6 5 5 - 4 2 0 0 for more informa tion.

ROOM FOR RENT

LOOKING TO RENT

BU RLINGTON: Studio & lbdrm . Clean, quiet bldg., parking, laundry, central loca tion downtown, walk every where. Avail in June. $ 4 8 5 $515/mo. Paul, 6 5 8 -9 9 4 8 . BURLINGTO N: 2-bdrm. apt., S. Union & Main St., porches, hdwd. firs., parking. No smokers/pets. $725/mo., incl. heat & hot water. Lease. Avail. 6/1. 8 6 4 -2 6 1 8 .

BURLINGTON: Airline pilot in VT 16 days/mo. needs room, $250/mo. range. Burlington area. Starting 5/23. Please call Paul, (407) 3 2 8 -1 1 5 8 . MONTPELIER/WATERB U RY: Prof, female w/ small dog look ing to rent clean & affordable 1 -bdrm. apt. or share a house w/ prof, female. 8 6 5-953 3.

BURLINGTON: Prof./grad for 2bdrm., W/D, off-street parking. No smokers/pets. Avail. 6/1. $375/mo. + utils. 8 6 4 -4 2 0 9 (eves.). BURLINGTON: Prof, for 2bdrm. duplex, Ig. yard, fullyfurnished, parking, have 2 cats. Need someone who’s hardly ever around. Nice place. $225/mo. + low utils. 8 6 5 -3 7 6 5 . BURLINGTON: Female prof./grad for spacious, clean home, close to UVM/downtown, W/D, parking. No smoking. Pets poss. $300/mo. + 1/3 utils. Avail. 6/1. 66 0 -2 4 3 0 . COLCHESTER: Mom of 5-yr.-old offers small room & finished basement, garage, 1.5 bath, laundry in duplex. $350/mo., Utils, incl. & other amenities. Carrie, 6 5 8 -9 8 0 7 or 8 7 8 - 1 2 9 7 (eve.). FORT ETHAN ALLEN: Female to share unique condo, big yard, non-smoking/drinking, pref. veggie, 30+. Pet OK. Avail. 5/16. $325/mo. Maureen, 6 5 5-544 9.

MALLETS BAY: Prof./grad stu dent to share nice 2 -bdrm. Quiet street, basement, W/D, garage, yard. No smoking/pets. $315/mo. + utils. 8 6 5 -3 8 1 4 .

SERVICES ARCHANGEL PRINTS: Personalized design/printing for business cards, brochures,’ newsletters, posters, CD covers, invitations, menus, etc. Just the way you want! Editing services also avail. 48 2 -6 0 9 5 . BASEBALL, FOOTBALL, basket ball, hockey scores/spreads NOW!!! 1 -9 0 0 -4 2 0 -2 3 0 0 ext.41 79 . $2.99/min. Must be 18+ Serv-U (619) 6 4 5 -8 4 3 4 . CARPENTRY: Repairs of all kinds— renovations, doors, win dows, floors, landlord turnovers, exterior/interior, insured. References & 18 yrs. experi ence. Chris Hanna, 8 6 5 -9 8 1 3 . N EED HELP? ...with resumes, proofreading, greeting cards, poetry, writing skills— academ ic, professional, or just for fun? Middle management, students, need a jump start? Let me be your mentor or imagination in a calm, confidential setting. Call Sandi for a myriad of cus tomized services. 8 6 4 - 7 0 7 8 or 6 5 2 -2 1 7 8 .

EM A IL SEC RET S! Learn how to mail 10 0 s of people at the same time! Plus dozens of more hot tips! 1 -9 0 0 -7 4 8 -1 1 1 3 ext.68 63 . $2.99/min. Must be 18+. Serv-U (619) 6 4 5-843 4.

CLEANING SERVICES THE SKY IS FALLING! The sky is falling...oh really? Call Diane H., housekeeper to the stars. 6 5 8 -7 4 5 8 . "S h e ’ll fix your wagon alright.” — Foxey Loxey

PERSONAL CHEFS P ersonal C hef available fur Private Elegant D in ner Parties CLASSICALLY TRAINED 20 YEARS EXPERIENCE EXTENSIVE PORTFOLIO Specializing in G m temporary American/Trad itKinal New England Cuisine featuring the finest in seasonal and regional delicacies

C h r ist o p h e r S l o a n e

899-5128 (Private instruction also available)

C + 0 P V M is J U + e © ■ O H THElR HoNEYMooN/ ■ THEY U K E P THAT A LoT/ S o I THE S E C o N P W AS M o R E EX o T lC -=T 1 wrN- L — :— £,4£ o L I THOUGH, THEY T o o K A G R A N P I THEY iM M E P lA T E L Y P LA N N EP I A H P W AY M o R E EXPEN SIV E. ' LA&m T our of | ANOTHER TRIP. ToUR o F EUROPE.

llTRipPlhlG

NEITHER OF THEM HAP EYER LEFT HOME.

YARD SALES BURLINGTON: Mansfield Neighbors— 18 families, 9 loca tions— presents 2 nd annual lawn, yard, garage and/or tag sale event! From the ordinary to the extraordinary! Saturday, May | 8 , 9-3 only. Off of Mansfield Ave.

i A y & w / y i A y .c o M

F R O M THEN oN THEY H AP To PLAN E V E R M o R E IN T ER EST IN G | BU T THEY’P L o S T THEiR J o B S T R IP S J U S T To EO U AL O R B E T T E R THE HIGH THEY H A P | B Y BEING AW AY ALL THE T IM E. g o tten

from

the

Fir s t

one.

THEY W E R E T A P P E P OUT. A N P THEY R E A L L Y N E E P E P A VACATION.

AUTOMOTIVE ’79 VW CAM PER, California car, fully-equipped., 9 0 K orig. mi., desert tan, roof rack, lots of new parts, runs great. Moving, must sell. $ 4 ,0 0 0 o.b.o. 6 5 2 -4 0 5 6 . BUY CARS! FROM $500. Upcoming seizure/surplus sales. Sport, luxury & economy cars. For current listings call 1-8003 1 1 - 5 0 4 8 ext. 1738. S E IZ E D C A R S FROM $500. Sport, luxury & economy cars, trucks, 4x4s, utility and more. For current listings call 1-8003 1 1 - 5 0 4 8 ext. 22 3 9 .

THEY N E V E R SA W MUCH o N THEIR T R A V E L S A F T E R THAT.

REAL ESTATE H O M E S FROM $5,000. Foreclosed and repossessed. No or low down payment. Credit trouble OK. For current listings call 1 -8 0 0 -3 1 1 -5 0 4 8 ext.34 78 .

page 4Z ‘ SEVEN DAYS

may 5,1999

THEY W E R E Too B U SY Lo o K lN G O V ER THEIR S H o U L P E R S.

ORGANIC PRODUCE ORGANIC FARM IN BU RLIN G TON’S Intervale offers reason ably priced farm memberships. Members receive basket of sea sonal produce (sweet corn, toma toes, mesclun, strawberries, more) each week, from June— November. Info: Jonathan at Urban Roots, 86 2-5929.

DATING COMPATIBLES: Singles meet by being in the same place as other singles. We’ve made this the best time to connect you. Call for details, 863-430 8. www.compatibles.com. N.E. SING LES CONNECTION: Dating and Friendship Network for relationship minded Single Adults. Professional, Intel ligent, Personal. Lifetime mem bership. Newsletter. For FR EE info, 1-800-775-3090.

TUTORING MATH, ENGLISH, WRITING, Science, Humanities, Proof-read ing, from elementary to graduate level. Test Prep for GRE, LSAT, GMAT, SAT-I, SAT-II, ACT, GED, TOEFL... Michael Kraemer, 86 24042.

HOMEBREW MAKE GREAT BEER AT HOME for only 500/bottle. Brew what you want when you want! Start up kits & prize-winning recipes. Gift certifs. are a great gift. VT Homebrew Supply, Rt. 15, Winooski. 65 5-2070.

BUY THIS STUFF NEED TIPI POLES? Now taking custom orders. $ 3 00 -$3 50 . Call (802) 453-632 3, or email: livinjuicy© hotmail.com.

WOLFF TANNING BEDS

ART

MUSIC

ATTENTION ARTISTS: Firehouse Gallery will exhibit 1 piece of art by the 1st 50 artists to dropoff work at Firehouse, 12 noon, Tues., May 11. Any medium. Ready to hang.

ADDS UP TO THE FATTEST SOUND in the Grn. Mtns.: A highly prof, bassist/producer ready to bring out your best from behind a Panasonic WR-DA7 digital console + ProTools/24 MIX (64 fully automated tracks of 24-bit digital audio) + best digital processing avail. (TC/Electron- ics, Focusrite, Lexicon, Apogee, Drawmer, Waves) + finest studio musicians in New England = MetaMedia™ Studios, 802-496-3520.

ATTENTION ARTISTS: Fine Art Flea Mart begins 5/15 in the alley next to Firehouse Gallery. For more info: 865-7165. STUDIO SCULPTURE CLASSES, middle school through adult groups. Starting in May. $15/class. Taught by Carole Murphy, figuritive sculptor, 8633425. LATINO ARTISTS living in Vermont needed for August exhi bition at Firehouse Gallery. All media. Info: 865-7165.

MUSIC BA SS CAB: ALUMA-PRO, cus tom 2x10", 4 Ohms, gold-plated cones. One of a kind. She’s a real beauty. New $600, sell for $400. Call Glenn, 864-9062. POKER HILL: Digital powerhouse studio. Demos/CD masters. Cool, relaxed, tremendous sounds, tried & true. 899-4263. WANTED: GUITARIST W/ Jerry’s spirit. School beckons present axeman, so Blues For Breakfast needs replacement into psyche delic blues, rock & originals. 43 4-4947. NO ONE GOES OUT & BUYS A CD because it’s “warm" or "fat." People buy music because it affects them. We have a long track record of helping recording artists succeed at affecting peo ple. We do this by providing an environment that is safe enough to allow artists to communicate in a way that’s genuine, while functioning at their peak level of performance. Recording is not so much a technical art as it is a humanistic one. This will have a profound impact on the success of your recording project. Come check us out, even if you’re not ready to record yet; we’d love to meet you. Little Castle Studio, 1-800-294-7250. SINGER/SONGW RITER looking for musicians or band to perform & create original music. Send tape & letter to Tracy Tomasi, PO Box 1146, Williston, VT 05495. YAMAHA VIBRAPHONE, $2,100; Clevinger bass, $1,700; Slingerland vintage drum set, $450; Gibson E S-12 5 circa '58, $1,300; Fender Jazz bass (USA), $650. 49 6-5315.

TAN AT HOME BUY D IREC T & SAVE! CO M M ERCIAL/H O M E UNITS FROM $199 LOW MONTHLY PAYMENTS FREE C O LO R CATALOG C A L L T O DA Y 1-800-711-0158

16-TRACK ANALOG RECORD ING STUDIO. Dogs, Cats & Clocks Productions. Warm, friendly, prof, environment. Services for: singer/ songwriters, jingles, bands. Reasonable rates. Call Robin, 658-1042.

ADULT

NASTYGIRLS!!! Hot! Live! 1on1

min.

1-800-458-6444 1-900-435-4405

GREEN MOUNTAIN SAVOYARDS seeking voices, especially lyric tenors, to perform Gilbert & Sullivan selections. Call 8601102. Also needed: pianist to accompany.

18+

COMPOSER/ARRANGER/PRODUCER w/ a lifetime of musical exp. seeks all types of musical projects. Contact Roger at Question Mark Records, 802363-1867. MAX MIX DJ/RECORD SHOP, 108 Church St., Burlington, looking for used DJ/music equip ment, record collections and local clothing designers. Merchandise placed on consign ment. 802-651-0722. AD ASTRA RECORDING. Got music? Produce it in the best possible way. 24-track automat ed mix down, first-rate gear. Wide array of keyboards; drums & more. Ad Astra, building a rep utation of sonic integrity. 8728583.

wellness wellness wellness ACUPUNC TURE ORIENTAL HEALING ARTS: 872-8886. See display ad.

AROMA THERAPY STAR ROOT: We specialize in fine custom blending for your aromatherapy, beauty and bodycare needs. Carrier oils and sup plies available. We stock over 100 therapeutic- grade pure essential oils. Ask about bulk pricing. 174 Battery St., Burl. 862-4421.

CHANNELING PLEIADIAN PERSPECTIVES: Tapes and channeling transcripts by mail. Send $3 postal money order for transcript # 1 , $ 1 0 for audiotape, postage & tax includ ed, to Kate Lanxner, Waterfront Holistic Healing Ctr., 3 Main St., Burlington, VT 05401.

MUSIC FITNESS INSTRUCTION

UNLOCK YOUR NATURAL D E SIR E to exercise. Untangle from stress. Energize your body. Attain your ideal body weight. Brought to you by Essential Symmetry. See “Announcements."

BANJO: Old-time banjo. Guaranteed after 4 lessons you will be playing Appalachian tunes. Learn to read tablature, music notation. Emphasis on rhythm & musicality. $ 20/hr. Mara McReynolds, 862-3581.

YMCA: 8 6 2 -9 6 2 2 . See display

ad.

BASS: Learn technique, theory, reading and groove. All levels welcome. Keith Hubacher (The Disciples, Nerbak Bros., The Christine Adler Band), reason able rates. Call 434-4309.

HERBS

DRUM: Musicians Institute Gradnet Counselor. Exper- ienced teacher/musician/ author. Competitive rates. Materials pro vided. Many subjects to focus on. References available. Gary Williams, 4 7 2-681 9 (mishima@together.net). GUITAR: All styles & levels. Emphasis on developing strong technique, thorough musicianship & personal style. Paul Asbell (Unknown Blues Revue, Kilimanjaro, Sklar-Grippo, etc.). 862-7696.

PURPLE SHUTTER HERBS: Burlington’s only full-service herb shop. We carry only the finest herbal products; many of them grown & produced in Vt. Featuring over 4 0 0 bulk dried herbs & tinctures. 100 Main Street, Burl. 865-HERB. Store hours: Mon.-Sat., 10-6.

MASSAGE SARI K. WOLF: 223-4715. See display ad. THERAPEUTIC BODYWORKS: 425-2688. See display ad.

ROLFING THOMAS WALKER & GAIL LOVEITT: 864-044 4. See display

ad.

SELFIMPROVE MENT

TREAT YOURSELF TO 75 M IN UTES OF RELAXATION. Deep therapeutic massage. Sessions: $40. Gift certificates. Located in downtown Burl. Flexible sched ule. Aviva Silberman, 86 2-0029.

UNLOCK YOUR NATURAL D E SIR E to exercise. Untangle from stress. Energize your body. Attain your ideal body weight. Brought to you by Essential Symmetry. See “Announcements.”

MEN’S HEALTH

D REA M S ARE REAL. Discover how to link your inner and outer realities. Experience it for your self. For a free book, call ECKANKAR, 1-800-L0VE GOD. Ask for book #F15. www.eckankar.org.

MEN ALIVE: 8 6 5 -2 2 4 7 or 87 28322. See display ad.

OFFICE SPACE SLEEP AIDS S T R E S S E D OUT? CAN ’T SL E E P ? Beat insomnia. Simple, natural, drug-free. 90 mi n. cassette & book. Moneyback guarantee. $ 1 5 (S&H incl.) to Sleep Easy Unlimited, PO Box 277, Burlington, VT 0 5 4 0 2 -0 2 7 7 .

TWO SPACES AVAILABLE FOR Holistic Practitioner/Counselors to join our group cooperative practice at Waterfront Holistic Healing Ctr., Burlington. Group meditations, potlucks, meetings, etc. Rent varies accord, to usage, year commitment, incl. utils. Convenient downtown loca tion, free parking. Avail now. 86 5-2756.

ERAPY

PSYCHICS

UL&AHY

DO WHAT STARS DO! Learn today what’s in store for you: Love, Family, Money. Call 1-9003 7 0 -3 3 9 9 Ext. 7761. $3.99/min. Must be 18 yrs. Serv U, 61 9-645 -8 33 4.

lerapeutic

|j a f W ^

lintenance of your body & mind BY APPOINTMENT

BERN ICE KELMAN: 899-354 2.

See display ad.

802-434-5529 Conveniently located in Williston> Vermont

ACUPUNCTURE • HERBS • ACUPRESSURE • MASSAGE

f £ M k

Zhen Gao Licensed Acupuncturist From China NOW IN STOCK

Dong Chong xia Cao (Cordyceps sinesis) An extremely rare herb collected high in the mts. of the Tibia region of China

LEGALS GRANT WRITER CITY OF WINOOSKI

MASSAGE TRANQUIL CONNECTION: Massage therapy. Pamper your self or a special someone to a massage. Soak in spa prior to session to mellow your mind, warm your body in serene, pri vate setting. Sessions start at $45; Head & foot massage $20; Spec, package: 3 1.5hr. sess. $165. Board-certified therapist. For appt. or leave msg., 6549200.

V isiting Specialists from C hina: Dr. Rong-hui Li — Herbalist coming in June: Dr. Hui-Lan Wan — Accupuncturist

Callfor FREE Initial Consultation

The city of Winooski is seeking an experienced grant writer. Candidates must possess suc cessful grant writing experience (both state and federal); refer ences required. Send letter of interest to City Manager, 27 West Allen St., Winooski, VT 0 5 4 0 4 or fax to 802-655-6414. EOE.

6 Central

YMCA Night Moves! TEEN MIDNIGHT

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Burlington's only Rolfing practitioners trained in this Q E P T L E & S E n S IT IV E approach

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MEN ALIVE Spring G athering W eek en d R e tre a t M a y

14-16

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We welcome all men to join our community of brothers based on respect and acceptance. The weekend offers a powerful and safe environment to : Have fun • Make Friends • Explore Feelings • Experience a Sweat Lodge • Find Out About Support Groups * Deal with transitions • Share good Food • Swim & Canoe • Play Music Call Barry 8 6 5 -2 2 4 7 or Carl 8 7 2 -8 3 2 2 .

A n s w e r s To L a s t W e e k ’ s P u z z l e A ! 0 B O L E D

T A

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n R E N O W

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through May 31st •cannot be combined with other offers

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P jA D

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INTEGRATIVE M A S S A G E

Release Fatigue and Pain therapeutic massage, myofascial therapies, Acupressure, Arom atherapy, Reiki

in Montpel ier, by appoi ntment 802-223-4715

05452

Bernice K e l m a n

YMCA 862-9622

EXPERIENCE THE NEW ROLFING

872.8886

£XA] R O

L M

R A V 0

S O Tl 1

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Pi R O 1 E R S K Y P A ■ A I R N E Pi N S E P E P R E 0 O D O P L S T E T) H O O G D R A E S

T S A R A T A R O C A P T H S V R 1 M O T A B A R 1 L E N S S T H T H 1 E R E L E S E E G G R 1 A A

1 L

may 5,1999

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SEVEN DAYS

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M a y

6 - 1 2 ther words, Capricorn, lebrating your raw anial vitality will make you arter.

ARIES (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): Best days this m onth for romance and friendship: 11, 12, 19, 20, 24, 25, 27, 28. Best days for home and family: 10, 11, 15, 17, 18. Best days to look for a stash of hundred-dollar bills inside a torn, filthy mattress lying by the side o f the road: 8, 13, 14. Best days to try to dream about a talk ing ham sandwich which can give you psychic advice about your job and career: 6, 7. Best day to escape a brothel in Tijuana if you’re a slave laborer there: 8. Best days to save a dog from being hit by a train and thereby receive a big reward from its grateful owner: 9, 15, 17. Best day to score black-market orchids: 7, 12, 13, 29.

TAURUS

(Apr. 20-May 20): I vividly remember the fiveminute burst o f inspiration, on a January afternoon more than five years ago, when the vision o f the book I’ve been working on ever since first sprouted. At the moment o f divine intoxication, I was sitting in the studio of radio station KPFA, waiting to be inter viewed by Jane Heaven, sipping Earl Grey tea from a styrofoam cup. I mention this, Taurus, because I believe you’re on sched ule to be blessed with one of those five-minute eruptions of raging creativity that could change your life — and there’s no telling when it will strike. Let’s hope you’ll have the leisure time and good sense to allow it to have its way with you when it shows up unannounced.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Celebrate tftfc emptiness, Gemini. T hat’s what I advise. Make peace with the emptiness, revel in it, invite it to be your surprising teacher. Maybe you’re used to see ing cowardly folks run from the kind o f Big Bleak Blankness you’re facing, and maybe you’ll be tempted to imitate them. But I’m

ACROSS . 1 Guitarist's - devices 6 Shapes 11 Unruly chil dren 16 Film colony’s shore haven 17 Spiritless 18 Kind of rock 20 Hold back 21 Country on the Indian Ocean 22 Kitchen gadgets 24 Grafted: Her. 25 Receding 27 Routine 29 — Mater 30 Narrow creek 31 Footed vases 32 Make eyes at 33 Back talk 34 This, in Spain 36 Dance of the '60s 37 Window hangings 39 Punjab prin40 Hoagy Car michael song hit 42 Snack all day: colloq. 43 Worshiped 45 List of play ers

// t% p a g e

46 Sheer cotton fabric 47 TV advertis ing award 48 * — Bovary " 51 Carried 52 Rodgers-Hart hit 56 Dwelling 57 Energetic 58 Large noses 59 Greek P 60 Painful 61 Pizza serving 62 Fragrant oleoresin 63 Remarkable deed 64 New Zealand bird 65 Suppose 66 Musical signs 67 Announce loudly 68 Dark-colored bird 70 Follows a recipe instruction 71 June belles 72 Contained 73 Coasters 74 Mournful sound 75 Make known 78 ‘Plaza — ’ (Neil Simon play) 79 Song hit of 1934 83 Author

SEVEN DAYS

telling you that this is a glorious opportunity to learn timeless secrets that are impossible to grasp when you’re feeling full and complete. Now please study this gem from D .H . Lawrence. “Are you willing to be sponged out, erased, canceled? Are you willing to be made nothing? Dipped into oblivion? If not, you will never really change.”

CANCER

(June 21-July 22): My great-great-great grandfather Edward Dembowski was a Polish count and leader of a revolution to establish democracy in Poland in the 1840s. In other words, he was both a nobleman and a rebel, a member of the privileged classes and a dissident seeking to over throw a corrupt hierarchy. It is his spirit that I invoke in my advice to you this week, my fellow Cancerian. Be like him: Fight to reform an institution which bene fits you and in which you wield considerable authority.

LEO

(July 23-Aug. 22): W hat comes up for you when I ask you to picture a hunter? You probably see the image of a redneck dude in a red flannel jacket pointing a rifle at a deer or duck. But it would be a shame if you couldn’t get beyond that, Leo. The original archetype o f the hunter is embod ied in the lean and athletic god dess Artemis, who was the great protectress and companion of the beasts. It’s her power that’s most alive in you right now. The best way to respond is to track down your heart’s wild desire with cun ning, courage and compassion.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I’m sorry to do this to you, Virgo, but you’re going to have to get along without my guidance this

Wiesel 84 Movie feats 86 Celebrity 87 Of the same kind 88 Dry fruit 89 Gambler’s concern 90 West Ger man city 91 Sault — Marie 92 Comedienne Adams 94 South Afri can fox 95 Italian sea port 97 Hearty dish 98 Becomes enfeebled 100 T h e — Mutiny" 102 Love tokens 104 Tristram Shandy" author 105 Baseball Hall of Famer 106 Ocean ves107 Old-time slaves 108 Toward gla cier direction 109 Moves smoothly

DOWN 1 Musical com position 2 Der — (Ade nauer)

3 Ingrid’s daughter 4 Theatrical award 5 Break-in-theclouds phe nomenon 6 T h e — of the Presi dent 1960" 7 Signs of tomorrow 8 Actress Shelley 9 Word with rot or run 10 Daydream 11 Baby’s knit ted shoe 12 Do a cow boy’s work 13 Pub pint 14 Louise or Turner 15 Excellent 16 Follower of a philosophic doctrine 19 Soft, white fur 20 Goddess of agriculture 23 Tasty 26 Very dry, as champagne 28 Leather oil flask 32 Papal veil 35 Penny fol lower 36 Blend 37 Food’s com

may 5, 1999

week. My excuse is a good one: Divorce has made me a blubber ing wreck. So tragicomically para lyzing is my sadness that I can barely write these words. Megadoses of St. John’s wort, the New Age Prozac, haven’t helped a bit, even when washed down with Irish whiskey. In fact, if it would n’t be too much trouble, maybe you could say a prayer for my sorry ass, or send along a healing token. (I’m at P.O. Box 150247, San Rafael, CA 94915.) Come to think of it, doing good deeds like that would bring you into symbi otic alignment with the cosmic rhythms. The best way to help yourself these days, you see, is to take your attention off yourself and help other people.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “The soul has subtle nuances,” wrote G.K. Chesterton, “that are more miraculous and more numerous than the colors of wood in autumn.” Strange that this would be so true about your Libran soul as spring explodes with its bright, simple hues. Your psyche resembles a garden in late October, which is to say that it’s dying on the surface yet teeming with ferment on the inside. If there was such a thing as a rain bow spawned by the moon instead of the sun, it would be your symbol for the coming week.

SCORPIO

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Judging from the gritty inti macy foreshadowed by your astro logical aspects, Scorpio, I trust you’re in the mood for some real love poems. Not the airbrushed fantasies concocted by the Hollywood dream machine; not the enervated mirages of silly per fection you glommed onto as a teenager; rather, celebrations of

panion gashes 38 Ancient 71 Welcome breed of dog benefit 39 ‘A — with a 73 House add View" ons 41 Judith Ander 74 Fool son. for one 75 Renovate 42 Prickly 76 Escapes evergreen detection shrub 77 Weaken 44 Expires morally 46 Put into 78 Froth or foam words 47 Cherrystones 79 Kind of skirt 48 Vertical 80 Gives a gloss to poles 49 Here and 81 Groups of eight there 82 Exclamations 50 Andrea — pf disgust 51 — home the bacon 85 Prepares the salad 52 Bock and lager 86 Hermits? 90 Czech 53 Mountain statesman nymph 93 Supplements 54 Busy airport 94 Funny Meara 55 Observes 95 In — veritas 57 Closed at 96 Author Lud one end wig 58 Smudges 61 — the beans 97 Seattle — (famous (blabs) horse) 62 Ignore 99 White-tailed 63 Spirited eagle dances 65 Olive genus 101 River island 66 Marks to let 103 Numero — stand 67 Cereal part 69 Korean statesman 70 Narrow

love’s knottiest tests and gifts. Here’s one to get you started, courtesy of your fellow Scorpio, Ezra Pound. “Be in me as the eternal moods/of the bleak wind, and not/As transient things are— /gaiety of flowers./Have me in the strong loneliness/of sunlfess cliffs/And of gray waters./Let the gods speak/softly of us/In days hereafter,/The shadowy flowers of orcus/Remember Thee— ”

SAGITTARIUS

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21): It’s not blind fate that’ll shape the coming week, Sagittarius, but you. So study Script A and Script B below, and decide which one you’ll imple ment with all your might. Script A. I wish I ’d said w h a t I was thinking. I wish I d id n ’t have to w a it so long, a n d could ju s t skip to the end. I wish I h a d changed when I h a d the chance. I wish I could get inside the m in d o f th a t person whose decisions affect m e so much. Script B. I swear I ’m going to turn this setback into an advantage. I swear I ’l l figure out a way to m ake m yself bigger than the person I was when I got m yself into this mess. I swear I w ill track dow n bigger, bet ter, more original sins a n d wilder, wetter, more interesting problems.

CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22Jan. 19): I interviewed a group of eight nudists to prepare for this horoscope, knowing as I do that you Capricorns will probably make your best contributions to society in the coming week while you’re skyclad. My consultants regaled me for several hours with stories about how healthy it is to live as they do. They especially wanted me to know that being naked gives you access to wild areas of your brain that are nor mally dormant or off-limits. In

IARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I suppose, Aquarius, that you could install stained glass with mythological images in the win dows of your home. You could have a fe n g shui expert suggest changes in decor that would improve the flow of chi. But you don’t have to be that elaborate, really. You can boost your domes tic bliss simply by adorning your walls with pictures of your heroes and role models. Strategically placed mirrors would enlarge your sense of space, and installing more plants on the premises would thrill both your eyes and your lungs. It also wouldn’t hurt to convert your home entertainment center into a shrine dedicated to O ur Lady of Ecstatic Nesting.

PISCES

(Feb. 19-Mar. 20): A while back, one of my favorite wise-guy readers, Russ Crim, wrote to tell me about the Swahili word kule. It means “in between” or “neither-this-way-nor-that.” K ule people are highly valued, according to Russ, because they are unbiased but not apathetic. Their passionate objectivity allows them to imagine a common ground that’s in the best interests of both sides in a conflict, thereby promoting a very organic form of harmony. “To be kule is to rule,” says Russ, and that’s especially true for you in the coming week. Pisces. ® You can call Rob Brexsny, day or night for your

expanded weekly horoscope 1 -9 0 0 -9 0 3 -2 5 0 0 $ 1 .9 9 p e r m lnuto. 18 and over. Touchtono phone, c /s 6 1 2 /3 7 3 - 9 7 8 5 And don’t fo rg e t to check out Rob’s Web s ite at ufuruf.realastrology.com / U pdated Tuesday night.

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we’re open 2 4 hours a day! DWPF, 48 , SEEKS PM, NS. MUST LIVE life with humor and enthusiasm. Comfortable with blue jeans or black tie, Al’s or Cafe Shelburne, Motown or Mozart. To celebrate life and create memories. 2997______________________ ME: SWBiF. YOU: SBM, 18-2 3 , for good food and laughs. Let’s see Titanic for the 100th time and cry. I won’t tell if you won’t. Could you be my Jack? 3000 STRIKING BLOND, PETITE PF, s ’3m. « 5 lbs., into fitness, hiking, biking, sailing, dancing, traveling, cultural events, spectator sports, more. ISO PSM, finan cially secure, similar interests, 45-55 , for fun along life’s long journey. 2939 „

Call _

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2 FUN, ATHLETIC, FREE-SPIRITED, BUT responsibly self-sufficient, pro fessional women seek compatible (read: admirable, likeable, principled, honest, etc.) men for dating, friendship, possible LTR. 2977_____________ WANTED: MEN TO FILL POSITIONS of escort, henchman, guru, bodyguard, aerobic instructor, squire, yeoman and the likes by 2 down-to-earth, life-lov ing, professional women. Call for application & compensation package. 2978 SWPF, 5 ’2 ", ATTRACTIVE, LONG brown hair, bl. eyes, slender. Likes to try just about anything once. ISO SW PM, 25 35 , sense of humor, daring & fun. 2981 HELLO? ARE YOU OUT THERE? SWPF, 30 , active, vivacious, enjoys life, attractive, self-confident, no kids (maybe som e day), ISO SW PM, 30 -40, honest, cute, humorous, active, non-slim, outdoorsy, but sharp dresser. Poss. LTR, friends first. 2986____________________________

A o sk in q m m I'VE PADDLED MY OWN CANOE, BUT TO share still waters, mountains, music and laughter with a fine man would be bliss. Lively, bread-baking DPF, NS, seeks mature, 45+, soulmate. 3002 DPWF, HAPPY MOM, MIDDLE-AGED educator, practical aesthete, responsi ble free spirit seeks Old World charm. No whiners, smokers or men under 50 . Strong moral fiber & sense of humor a must. 3005___________________________ WARM-HEARTED, ATTRACTIVE DWF, 44, creative, whimsical, curious, happy in the universe, seeks same in a SM, NS, 40-50, to explore waterways, bookstores, starry nights. 3006_____________ DPWF, OPEN-HEARTED EDUCATOR & mom respects independent interests and loves to laugh. Live my faith with grace & gratitude. ISO kind heart, 45 + who know how to sail a steady course. 3010_________________________________ HIGH-ENERGY. GAP-CLIMBING DWF, 39 , attractive, fit, triathlete, bolnd, bluegreen eyes, ISO intelligent, athletic PM, 25 -45 . Call to bike through France while enjoying a fine Burgundy. 3019 HOMEBODY WHO LIKES TO GO OUT seeking someone to share food, laugh ter, conversation, nature, music & movies with. I am a DPF, 44, ISO a M, 38-50. 3023__________________________ EASILY AMUSED, CHARMING, INDEPEN DENT, well-educated SPF, 42 , into gar dening, arts, biking, hiking, skiing, relaxing & enjoying cultural life of Burlington, seeking well-adjusted, fun SPM, 35 -47 , for mutually supportive LTR. NS, ND, NA, please. 3027________ SHIP’S CAPTAIN SEEKS 1ST MATE, 28 38, to capture Piscean mermaid’s heart. Must be athletic, patient, intelligent and willing to sail into romantic adventures. 3029___________________________ WHO SAYS BLONDS HAVE ALL THE FUN? SWPF ISO baseball-loving, sunset watching dinner date. If you’re a SWPM, ready for a slender brunette, 43, full of fun, let’s talk! 2969_________ ME: SWEET 81 SARCASTIC; TOFU &. tater tots; Yoga Journal & People, foreign films & Flintstones; ready for a partner, ambivalent about the process. You: 32 40. NS, curious, aware, honest. 2972

tender-loving woman seeks a man w/ a heart of gold. Fit, attractive, ener getic DWPF, 42 , no kids, likes art, music, dancing, animals, plants and maybe you? North Ctrl. VT. 2970

BRILLIANT, GORGEOUS 81 TALENTED. Outdoor endurance athlete, writer, nature-loving and spiritual SWF, 30S, seeks life mate (no pressure!). Be inter esting, balanced, fun and kind-hearted. Integrity? Optimism? Compassion? Good stuff! 2987___________________________ DPF, 2 7 , ISO INTELLIGENT, MOTIVATED. attractive & fun M who doesn't answer personal ads and is not desperate for love or habitually writing poetry about sunsets & beach walks.' 2992_________ FAIRY-TALE ROMANCE SOUGHT BY attractive, adventurous DWPF, 33 . Prefer attractive S/DWPM, 30 -40, inde pendent and secure. Aspiring princes must be emotionally available, playful and passionate about life, love and adventure. 2996

LOVELY, CHARMING, TENDER-HEARTED, passionate and spiritual woman desires a deep-learning friendship with a good man, 3 0 S -5 0 S . Enjoys laughter, music, dancing, reading, racquetball, sailing, auctions, cooking, good wines &, most importantly, stimulating & challenging conversation. 2947___________________ ACTIVE, ATTRACTIVE WOMAN ISO best friend/lover to enjoy life’s varied fla vors. Are you interested in meeting a DWPF, 46, who is actively exploring all that life offers? 2953__________________ SLENDER, SOULFUL, RADIANT SWPF, 40, with a passion for the natural world and active outdoor pursuits. Seeking slim/athletic, active, intelligent, earthy S/DPM, 35 -50, with sparkle, wit and warmth. 2954____________________ IS THIS THE LAND OF THE UNEDUCAT ED, unemployed, unavailable, under aged? SWPF, 30 , with kids, car, house, job, brain, seeking the almost perfect man. Wow me w/ your response. 2956 PETITE, 50, WWIF W/TEENS. Reader, nature lover, sometimes silly, looking for devout, financially secure D/WiWM, 45+, NS, to share “the rest of the story” with. 2958_____________________ DWF, 4 5 , 5 V , 150 LBS., LOOKING FOR companion for camping, hiking and general fun times. Must be NS, moder ate drinker and love animals. Interested? Let’s talk. 2922____________ LETS ENJOY THE SUNSHINE. SWF, NS, 32 , 5 ’i ”, would like to meet a SWM, NS, 31 -38 , who is sensitive and would like to develop friendship 81 share experiences. 2930____________________ UNCONVENTIONAL 49 YO DWF recently returned from teaching art in Africa. ISO spiritual, contemplative, witty SM for hiking, biking, swing dancing, light hearted appreciation of Earth. Possible LTR. NS, ND, no malls. 2884

Please

at th e

jo in us

Spring Fling Singles P a rty at (Huh Metronome

• « ® •

$ 1.99 a minute, must be 18 +.

MY FRIENDS AND I ARE ISO PARTNERS in crime who enjoy being dazed & con fused in the afternoons while baking at 4 :20. 2882___________________________ ISO WORKOUT. AN ACCELERATED heart rate from kissing that glistens, wellearned sweat from love who listens... Spot me if you are of the light, beautiful, into deliberateness. 2885__________

Lo vs

c jo u m

e w

INCORRIGIBLE, 46, VOLUPTUOUS DF, NS, who knows her body, mind & spirit connectedness. Enjoys outdoors, for eign films. ISO NS, 40+, w/ intimate self-awareness, honesty, adventurous traveler. Couch potatoes need not apply. 2903__________________________ HAPPINESS IS: TOGETHER ON A MTN. at sunset, sultry summer air, warm earthly scents, romance, peace, quiet, looking deeply in your eyes, laughs. SWF, 27 . seeks SW M, 25 -30 , NS. 2853 . GOURMET M RECIPE: Add these ingredi ents & mix well: heart, brain, smirky grin & insanely goofy interior. SWF, 34 , will stir up these ingredients. 2858 TUMBLEWEED SEEKS REASON FOR roots. Curvy, easy-to-look-at SWF, 40s, accomplished at work, play, life, wishes to share music making, sweat, good life w/ tall, centered M type. 2860

Dear Lola, Aty husband has

recently embarked on a spiritual quest. His body

SWF, 2 1, ISO SW, athletic, preppy M, 21 -25 , for fun & to act silly. Must love dogs, playing volleyball on the beach & listening to Jimmy Buffett. 2861

h a s n ’t left town, but his

FUN-LOVING SWF, 2 1, STUDENT. Likes: Chianti, outdoor sports and sarcasm. Seeks: well-dressed, athletic M, 21 -26, for adventure, fun & laughter. Must like hiking, movies & snowball fights. 2862

a thousand miles away

INDEPENDENT FEMALE ADVENTURER, skier, climber, horse woman. I like to play outside & hate the city. Looking for someone to play with; tired of going solo. 2873_____________________

pray ins, chanting and

SWF, 3 1, DARK HAIR/EYES, PETITE, down-to-earth, enjoys quiet evenings at home, outdoors, occasional nights out. ISO LTR w/ sensitive guy, 30s, cares about himself & others, doesn’t need to impress me. 2880____________ DWF WHO STILL WANTS TO BELIEVE IN fairytales...waiting for extraordinary M, 40-55 , worldly, sincere, intelligent, open, secure, attractive in/out, humor ous, environmentalist, passionate, parent, wanting to believe, too. 2834 THE KEY TO INTIMACY IS THE COMMIT MENT to honesty and to the radical forgiveness necessary in order for hon esty to be safe. DWF, 37 , NS/ND ISO S M who shares same belief. 2845______ DWF. NS. MY LIFE IS DIVIDED BUSILY between farm, art, profession & family. Aesthetics, nature’s wisdom & beauty are core. I love to bike, kayak, trailride, swim, travel, hike, photograph Charlotte countryside, given time. 5 *2”, Rubenesque, adventuresome, indepen dent, creative. Guitar player, w ood worker, horseman, communicative, cheerful optimist preferred, soish. 2846 SPRING FLING? I want to share my last 3 months in Burlington w/ an uncom plicated man who likes dancing, hik ing, theater-going, dining out. I’m 47 , 5 ’6”, attractive & adventurous. 2800

mind scmetimes seems as he spends more a n d m ere time meditating,

consulting with various Surus. He tells me that he loves me more than ever, and assures me th at our sex lift won't be aftected. Sc far, so Seed. When I can catch him between mantras. But I c a n ’t help worry ing. Am I making a mountain cut of a molehill? Atheist in Alburs Dear Atheist. J c u haven't speci fied which spiritual paths your husband is pounding in search of his soul. In some reli gious traditions, the

m e n A o o k in q w o m e n

highest form of worship is celibacy. In others,

Friday, May 7, 9 p.111. F e a t u r in g th e s w in g in ’ ju m p

blues of B l o o z o t o m y ! Cash har • Hors <i oeuvres • Prizes Introductory Swing Dance Lessons offered earlier in the evening.

See page 13 for details.

DO YOU ENJOY FROLICKING OUTDOORS? Me, too! SW M, 35 , 190 lbs., 6*2 ”, NS, social drinker, loves outdoors activities, occasional night out in Burlington. Seeking active NS, 28-37 , for friendship, possible LTR. 3004______________ WANTED: TROPHY DATE. Recently DWM, 48, seeks tall, slender nymph of legal age to create shockwave at upcoming reunion. Exercise your wicked side. All in good fun! 3007 JUST ANOTHER AD. Loving, caring man, NS, 5 *9”, 165 lbs., seeks warm, kind woman for special times. I tike to read, run, draw, hike, dance, travel. Happy Mother’s Day! 3008___________________ TRUE-LOVE BELIEVER ISO W ISE GOD DESS, beautiful, slim, passionate, pet lover. WiM, 50, 5 *8”, fit, seeker of peace & happiness for each and every one. I love you. 3009

sex is tan tam ou n t to a sacrament. Slip him a copy of The Kama Sutra. Or remind him that in Judaism, love between spouses on the Sabbath is considered a "double m itzvah.” Then pray to Bertrand Russell and your Darwin fish th at he doesn't take a wrong turn. Lcve■ d

§ u

J u

Or respond the old*fashion way: CALL THE NUM BER.

900

Call 1 -9 0 0 -3 7 0 -7 1 2 7 $1.99/mfn. m u s t b e 18+

may 5,1999

SEVEN DAYS

page 45

don't want a charge on your phone bill? call 1 -8 0 0 -7 10 -8 7 2 7 •

m m m

•

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non Aoekinq women, amt SPRING FUNG: SWM, 3 8 . 6', ISO lively SF, 25 -38 , who is fit, happy, educated. Interests: sailing, tennis, travel, moun tains, the ocean, off-beat humor, bad weather, spicy food, crop circles. You? 3016 ________________________________ SUMMER FUN! DWM, 40S, 5 ’9 ", 150 lbs., youthful, engaging, open-minded, appealing. Likes outdoors, Burlington nightlife, laughing, movies, sunsets, travel, photography, crop circles. ISO lover to share fun times. 3020________ LETS RUMBA, BABY. Fun and active SW PM, 37 , 5 ’n ”, 185 lbs., Antonio Banderas good looks, seeks sultry sweetheart, 25 -37 , for friendship & romance. Wild streaks OK. Femme fatales not. For LTR. 3022__________ HANDSOME, PASSIONATE, CONTEM PLATIVE, prefers long hair, flowing dresses, curves, simple rural lifestyle, physical outdoor work and play, deep talks, slow lovemaking, meditation, working together at home, not eating animals, commitment. 3017 __________ FOR REAL DWM, 3 7 , s'ST, 170 LBS., looking. Race, age, straight, Bi unim portant. Who you are is. Open to any and all who are open, uninhibited and for real. 3024______________•__________ SWM, TALL DARK, HANDSOME, PILOT, sailor, adventurer, seeks adventuress. Redheads a plus, but not necessary.

222§_____________________________ SEEKING SLIM, SUPERFLY CHICK into alt. music, kind beer, pool hust- ling, veggie eating (except sushi), misty hikes, summer blading, Flynn Theater, Montreal casino. 20 -something SW M w/ body/looks of Greek god! 2975________ STELLA GET YOUR GROOVE BACK. Handsome, fit PBM, 25 , ISO very mature or older woman. “Age is nothing but a number.” 2988____________ SWM, 50, LOOKS 40, LOOKING F O R A cute intellectual with a narrow body and a broad mind. And heart. I’ll be at the May 7 party and so will you. 2989 TALL ATTTRACTIVE, EDUCATED SWM, 26, ISO beautiful, intelligent, stable S/MaWF for summertime adventures.

m i _______________________ WHAT DO WE WANT? Young 40s, alive & loving, dependable, seeks younger, mature, sexy F with depth, wit, humor, passions, to share memorable times, psychospiritual climbs. Follow your heart. 2994__________________________ PARTNER IN TIME. White, selfemployed, 45 , 6’, 175 lbs., fit, fun, dependable, honest and mischievous. Call if you can come out & play. 3001 GOING UP. TALL FIT, UPPER 30 S, been colleged, been married, been a dad, been divorced, been single, been bet ter for it. Been making the. mistakes different mistakes. Been looking for a friend. 2999______ ___________________ FINANCIALLY SOLVENT, COMPETITIVE SW M ISO a healthy relationship with the right woman. I value spontaneity, optimism, beauty & happiness. If you have a lust for life and a heart that needs to share love, please do respond. 20-30 YO. 2937

RESTLESS IN MIDDLEBURY. Well-adjust ed, easy-going, gentle DWM who likes, but does not have, children— fit, outdoor-oriented, slim, 5 *10 ”, 45 , humor ous, strong ethics & morals— seeks PF, NS w/ similar characteristics for LTR. Carry-on baggage usually fits. 2938 IF YOU ENJOY OUTDOOR ACTIVITIES, dining, dancing, laughing and are 5’6”, or less, 35 -45 , fit, active, attractive, call me ASAP. SW M, 45 , fit, humorous.

m i ________________________ DO YOU ENJOY CUDDLING, HOLDING hands & other activities done in pri vate? Young professional w/ Latin looks seeks young, attractive, sassy lass. I like movies, music, good food & the outdoors. Wimps need not apply.

i______________________________

DPM, 4 3 , ENJOYS DANCING, DINING, trips, sunsets, beaches, cuddling at home, treating a lady w/ honesty, respect, sincerety. ISO F with similar interests for possible LTR. 2943 YOUNG-LOOKING DWM, 4 5 . EXCELLENT physical condition & health, s ’s ”, br./br., ND, smoker, financially secure, lives alone. Seeks F companion to enjoy evenings/weekends camping, fishing & dining. 2944_______________ MEAN PEOPLE SUCK! SINGLE PISCEAN Celt, 29, atheist, anarchist, tall, hand some, sober and loving. Seeking bril liant, tall and kind woman, 25 -35 , who desires love w/ intellectual fulfillment. Middlebury area. 2948________________ “ANDRE FOR ANNA”: SWM, 29, seeks F opponent for a match. No certain skill level needed. I am not concerned with winning...in fact, love suits me fine. Racquets included. 2968______________ SHE IS SOMEW HERE-QUIET, BUT NOT afraid, peaceful, energetic, content, but adventuresome, mellow, wild, playful, yet sincere, waterfalls, wind and feath er pillows. Me: father, earthdrummer, rural, rocker, vegetarian, here. 2955 BEER DRINKIN’ & HELL RAISING SWM,

25 , ISO SF accomplice, 18 -25 . From being high in the mountains to getting down in the valleys, let’s have some fun!! 2964____________________________ RED ROVER, RED ROVER! ALL FAIR AND winsome women, 34 -44, with tender hearts, svelte figures and inquisitive minds come over! Smokers and jokers: one, two, three red light! 2959________ MUSE WANTED. NEA WRITER, 5 7 , retired English and film teacher, ISO super intelligent, slightly wacky, but not psychotic, woman who’s read Gurdjief, but thinks Lao-Tzu and Daffy Duck got it right. 2961_______________ FOR REAL-GENTLE MAN, GOOD-LOOK ING, middle-age, very solvent, .search ing for attractive, companionable lady to share rich, fulfilling life, travel, yachting, just plain fun. Eventual commitment, my goal. 2965_______________ SWM, 36 , 5 ’10 “. BLUE-EYED, ATTRAC TIVE, introverted, invitive, and a bit nuts! Seeks same qualities in 25-40 YO F. We both know society sucks, but continue to evolve. 2967______________ IF YOU ARE A SF, 2 2 -40, I AM SEARCHing for you. SW M, 27 , 6’i ”: I enjoy long walks and writing poetry. Beautiful sunsets are worth sharing.

2909

•

TAKE A CHANCE... HANDSOME SWP, 40s, excellent table manners, wellbehaved and belief in traditional val ues, would like to meet attractive lady for companionship to share laughter and activities. 2910___________________ SWM, 29, W/ AFFINITY FOR SOCCER & massages, ISO intelligent, attractive SF w/ a great smile. Possible LTR, or just hanging out is a great start. 2911______ DWM, 37, 5’io". I AM INTO MUSIC, movies and outdoor activities, but hibernate in the winter. ISO S/DF, 30 37 , into much the same for friendship, possibly more. Interested? 2919_______ APPLICATIONS NOW BEING ACCEPTED: DWM, 39 , 5 ’8”, 180 lbs., brn. hair/eyes. Enjoys music, TV, movies, fishing, camping, hiking, skiing, long rides in the country, companionship. Seeking F, 25 -45 , to fill position. 2912___________ SARCASTIC, SEXY, INTELLIGENT SWPM, 30 , ISO soulful, classy feminist, 24-34 , with style, heart and gusto to share an appreciation of nature, music, good fun, food and conversation. 2914______ I BELIEVE WE ARE HERE TO FACE OUR fears and to find love. SW M, 31 , also lives for mtn. biking, film, coffee, Internet, dark beer, a healthy fantasy life (BD/SM, anyone?). 2915___________ NO SENSE OF HUMOR, DWM, 5 *10“, 165 lbs., bl. eyes, handsome, fit, NS, late 40s, but w/ hair and teeth. Skiing, dancing, dining, picnics, V.S.O. ISO lady who can make my knees knock. Let’s talk. 2925_______________________ SWM, MUSIC-LOVER, GREAT KISSER & creatively caring man seeks beautiful and sexy girl in her 20s to share my love with & call my own. I like giving & receiving attention. 2936___________ SM, 5 2 , RUTLAND AREA, SEEKS attrac tive lady, 30 -55 , for dating leading to LTR. Only ladies seeking respect, car ing, and honesty need respond. I’m 5 *11 *’, blue eyes, brown hair. 2934 SINGLE MALE, 49, LIVING IN ALTERED state, seeks spiritual female. Truth and justice major priority. Northeast Kingdom area. Y 2 K compliant. 2932

S H IP ’S C A P T A IN S E E K S 1 S T M A T E,

3029

191 Bank S t , Burlington 860-0190

W inner also receives dinner for 2 at

15 Center S t , Burlington 862-9647

MY FRIEND DAVE IS TALL, BLONDE, outdoorsy and gorgeous. He is also too (something) to consider placing an ad. For him: an active/outdoorsy, intel ligent, liberal, pagan voodoo dancer woman. 2 8 9 3 ______________________________ SM, 3 8 , TEACHER, PROFESSIONAL actor/director, is seeking independent woman w/ hope, humor and sense of wonder (writer? scientist? red hair?) to share unconventional life and produce beautiful babies. 2894________________ SWM, 2 2 , ATTRACTIVE, WITTY, CARING. likes sports, movies, quiet evenings. ISO attractive F, open-minded, NS, dis ease-free, kinky, horny for adult pleasure/possible LTR. Letter/photo. 2890

SPRING COMES QUICKLY BY, IT BRINGS with it sugar snows and maple pie and dandelion greens, not so serene... From mid-life writer, teacher, gardener who seeks woman of dreams. 2933 TIRED OF GAMES, SWM, 30 , CATHOLIC, tall, physically fit, enjoys Rollerblading, biking, working out, movies, dinner. ISO SWF, attractive, honest, physically fit, 24-36 , spiritual for LTR & fun times. Children OK. Is anyone out there? 2929

FUN, ATHLETIC, EDUCATED, SINCERE, good-looking, skiing, biking, NS SWPM, 35 , seeks NS, athletic, sweet, attractive SF, 27 -36 , who likes to play hard, enjoys back-country adventures, film, travel, dogs. 2855_______________

ARE YOU VEGETARIAN, 25 -35 , intelli gent, open, interactive, fit, self-confi dent, conscience-minded, hopelessly romantic, excited by music, art, moun tain bikes and purity of human emotions? I’m waiting for you! 2889_______

SJM, 30 , ENTREPRENEUR, TALL, DARK & handsome, ISO SPF, 25 -35 , who is beautiful, adventurous, and sponta neous. Seeking LTR, no games, no kids, and no pets. 2856________ ______

SWM, 3 2 , LOOKING FOR THE WOMAN to knock over liquor stores with, then spend the downtime basking in expen sive beers, cheap theater, boarder cross, & yard sales. It’s go time, baby!

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28-38, to capture Piscean mermaid’s heart. Must be athletic, patient, intelli gent and willing too sail into romantic adventures.

ALTERNATIVE-MINDED SW PM WHO enjoys nature, hiking, biking, writing & fun stuff is seeking a fluently natural woman for a co-creative relationship. Healthy, 34 , 5 ’9”, NS/ND/NA, Rutland area. 2850___________________________

MAN FROM MARS: DWCM, 5 5 , NS/NA, looking for easy-going extrovert, shapely, 4oish, active CF, over 5 ’4”, under 150 lbs. Interests in church, dancing & other social activities. 2907

Personal of the W eek receives a gift certificate for a FREE D a y Hiker’s Guide to VT from

BEAUTIFUL M, WELL-CENTERED, stable, low maintenance; loves jazz, art, fine dining, moonlit walks, sleeping late. Seeking similar partner, late 2 0 S -3 0 S , to explore life’s finer aspects. 2 8 7 0

ARE YOU OKAY? THAT FALL FROM Heaven must have hurt. Single, starswept seraphim, 43 , seeks single, scin tillating female soulmate. Remember, true love is “Heaven sent.” 2871______ THIRTYSOMETHING MAN, NS, profes sionally an art instructor, socially an artist, poet, musician 81 dancer, seeks an NS, outgoing 28-42 YO who wishes to have her cake... Honesty as my frosting. 2872________________________ IF YOU'VE GOT EVERYTHING EXCEPT someone to share it with, I’d like to meet you. D PM seeks NS S/DPF, 30 -40, who’s bright, talented, attractive and likes the outdoors. Kids OK. 2875 RELATIONSHIP MAKES LIFE COME TO LIFE. I’m 33 , tall, attractive, high IQ, professional, creative, sincere, openhearted, relationship-oriented. If you’re 25 -32 , real, seek true love, let’s meet and explore. 2877____________________ LIFE IS FOR LIVERS. Fit, attractive, ide alistic SPM, 46, seeks smart, sexy, happy, progressive woman (with a good liver) to share culture, travel, outdoor activities, politics, partying and shade-tree philosophizing. Laughter, music and love happen! 2843 SWPCM736, CATHOLIC W/ AGREAT attitude towards life seeks F with similar perspective for friendship. 2837 IF YOU’RE FUN, FIT, ATTRACTIVE, edu cated, high-energy and spontaneous, then we have a lot in common. SW PM looking for F, 35 -45 , approx. 5 ’6”. Successful and generous soul seeking mate. 2839

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page 46

SEVEN DAYS

may 5,1999

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we’re open 2 4 hours NEW TO SCENE. SW M, 50, seeks top males for fun and friendship. Age/race open. I’m 5 ’u ”, med. build, blue eyes, brown hair. 2935_____________________ BiF, 4 5 , ATTRACTIVE ISO F FOR FUN & frolic while hubby is travelling. Must be open-minded, love life and consider spending the summer in my mountain cabin. 2974__________________________ Bi-CURIOUS MaWF ISO Bi OR Bi-CURIOUS F, 20-35 , for friendship, maybe more. Must love life & horses. 2945 DON'T PASS THIS BUTCH BY. The Count seeks femme, 18 -27 , for nights of dark mystery. Sm oke rw h o enjoys bowling, pool, dancing, music... No more broken hearts, please! 2957

JUST GOING AROUND AGAIN FOR A chance at romance— really & truly, that is! Perhaps you’d like to meet up with me sometime real soon? GM is in a usual way; looking for romance. 2904 SUBM ISSIVE MALE SEEKS DOMINANT male. Can I please you? 2883_________ ENJOY HIKING, SKIING, GYM, SUSHI, outgoing. Looking for 25-35 YO with similar interests, fun & muscular. Burlington. 2859 SWBiM, 4 2 , ST. ALBANS AREA, dom es tic type ISO Bi/GM, 30 -45 . No head games, NS. Are you clean, honest, spir.itual & hairy? Sincere LTR only. 2876 GWM, 4 5 , LOVES COOKING, GARDEN ING, travel, long drives. ISO GWM, 35 55 , for LTR. Let’s get to know each other, 2814___________________________

Mtoking m en GWM ISO YOUNG MEN. I'M BLOND, gr. eyes, 5 ’9”, 160 lbs., boyish-looking. You: 18-25 GWM, good-looking, loves snuggling, animals, hometime & playtime. One-nighters OK. ISO LTR. 2980 SPIRITUAL COMPANION. GWM, 3 9 , 5’8”, 198 lbs., br. hair/bl. eyes. Hobbies: literature, movies, art & the ater. Seeks intelligent, sensual, creative GM, NS, ND, no fats, no femmes. 2952

To respond to Letters Only ads: Seal your response in an envelope, write box # on the outside and place in another envelope with $5 for each response. Address to: TO PERSON c/o SEVEN DAYS, P.O. Box 1164 , Burlington, VT 05402

SWF, 5 ’2 ". BR./BL, HELPING profes sional, attractive, kind & caring, smart, funny, has kids and cats. Seeks a nice guy, handsome and smart, whose life is not all about himself, Box 521 ______ “WISH ! COULD MEET A GIRL JUST LIKE YOU!” I’m sick of hearing that one. I’m attractive, SWF, mid-20S, full-figured, educated, active, fun, love art & horror movies. ISO SM, 2 i- 3 oish, smart & cre ative, not absorbed in appearances. Simpsons fan a +. Serious inquires only. Box 513 _________________________ 49, TRADITIONAL, ADVENTUROUS, lib eral, irreverent, spiritual, empathetic, sensual & curious, seeks humorous, kind, active man with passion for living life’s questions, who would cherish a partner with whom to enjoy some answers. Box 501_____________________ BEAUTIFUL SPRING GODDESS, 3 3 , WITH one child, healthy lifestyle. Seeks kind, nspired, passionate, handsome, so u l ful man, 25 -40. Drawn to: dance, fire light, drums, summer waters, sunsets, woods, ancient cultures, Gaia’s myster ies. Box 507

HEALTHY OPTIMIST, DWM, 6’, 60S, educated & semi-retired. I enjoy the outdoors (swimming, canoeing, sailing, hiking, walking), cooking & eating, reading, ballroom dancing, oldies, opera, ballet, trips on uncongested country roads. I’m romantic, soft, selfconfident, outgoing. Would like to find a feminine woman, who is compatible, has time during the week & on week ends to share and enjoy her & my favorite pastimes together. Box 522

•

i A p ij APPLE MOUNTAIN, 4/1 7 : YOU HELPED me hang a sunflower watercolor paint ing. Your kindness left a tantalizing impression. Coffee? Chat? My treat! 3018 _________________________________

ATTRACTIVE CU ISO BiF TO SHARE erot ic times. 20-40, healthy and good looking, playful & passionate. 2971________

COUPLE LOOKING FOR HOT, YOUNG stud. 2926___________________________ BIWM, 48, 5 ’io", 170 LBS., ISO OTHER Bi/CU who are articulate, adventurous, creative, to share friendship and imaginative fun. 2927______________________

ME: F, 20 YO. YOU: CREATIVE, athletic, intelligent, funny, courageous, outgo ing, kind, sensitive, beautiful! Amazing blue eyes, long talks, starry nights, stinky... You amaze me. Thank you, slppy. 3028___________________________

IMAGINATIVE, FUN SWM, 30 , ISO naughty, but nice, playmates to share erotic, romantic, imaginative, safe adventures w/ lonely & Ma welcome, 3 somes too. Discreet/clean a must, 2881

4/1 7 . OH! FAIR DAMSEL, ELEGANT AND true, I bow before thee. Regal beauty, gown of blue crossed my path, hours half before midnight. I on my steel horse, you smiled, pure and bright.

SWM, 4 5 , ATHLETIC, INTELLIGENT, interested in fit, intelligent Fs, 30 -50 , for sensual, discreet rendezvous. No commitment, just unbelievable pleasure. 2852___________________________

LAUREN, SUGAR DADDY IS INTERESTED, but you forgot to leave your phone number. 2908________________________

MaWM, EARLY 40'S, ATTRACTIVE, FIT & full of energy, seeking slim to mediumbuilt SWF or MaWF, 25 -45 , to experi ence erotic adventures & fantasies with clean, safe, discreet.'Same expected.

2976_____________________________

WM, 3 8 , 5 ’6", 145 LBS., good-looking. Looking for CU for discreet, adult fun. Discretion expected & assured. 2990

2 3 YO M, FIT, ACTIVE, HEALTHY, attrac tive, seeks F, 25 -40, to be my mentor in the art of pleasure. I’d like to be a master. Must be clean, attractive & sane. 2949

29 YO NIHILIST SEEKS NOTHING. Please send photograph. Box 509____________

•

AMATEUR MALE STRIPPER, BLOND, FIT, tan, performs at all-male parties for free. I tease, then I please. A wild time for you and your friends. Adult videos a possibility. 2913____________________

CAN JOHNNY COME OUT AND PLAY? Is Johnny afraid to come out or be found out? GWPM, 42 , ISO others, 25 -45 , who want to play or LTR. Marital status not important. 2848

HOPELESSLY ROMANTIC DWM, 40, artistic soul. Having a need to be cre ative. Poet, lyricist, sculptor, NS, ND. Mildly disabled with impaired speech. ISO F to appreciate life with. LTR possible. Box 519________________________

HAVING FUN. CU LOOKING FOR YOUNG M, 21 -25 , for love slave. No pain, just be submissive and have fun, serve and give body rubs. Clean & discreet a must. 3026__________________________

GWM, LATE 50S ISO MALES FOR FUN & friendship. Age/race open. I’m 5 ’io ”, balding & a little overweight, but love to please. 2841________ ______________

2 7 YO, FULL-FIGURED, AFFECTIONATE SWF in Plattsburgh. ISO full-figured, affectionate SWM, 25 -45 , to spend time with. Hearty laughter, fiery pas sion & sharp wit. Let’s share. Box 494

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MWP NICE GUY (SUGAR DADDY) SEEKS mistress: attractive, fun, young woman who knows what she wants and wilting to be or act kinky and caring at occa sional rendezvous. Calls only. 2908

SWM, 40S, INTELLIGENT, ATHLETIC 81 passionate, ISO fit, attractive lady, 2045 , for disreet rendezvous. No headgames. Intimacy, friendship, pleasure. 2995___________________________

SPF, PETITE, PR tl iV, AIHLEIIC, N^, vivacious, witty and intelligent with heart of gold! Enjoys outdoors, run ning, dancing, cooking, arts/film. ISO PM, 34 -40, intelligent, physically fit, fun(ny), energetic, secure. LTR w/ someone special as partner &. best friend. Box 496______________________

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LOOKING FOR L6 VE. DWM, 4 2 , 6’i",

195 lbs. I enjoy my kids, biking, Rollerblading, gardening and more. Seeking a lady who has same inter ests. Fit, 28-42. Send photo, please. Box 520_____________________________ POPEYE SEEKING OLIVE OYL SWM, 32 , thin, attractive, intelligent, emotionally stable. Very affectionate; however, suf fers severe initial shyness. Many inter ests. Seeking mutual chemistry with stable, 30s, Olive. No chubby Looney Tunes, please! Box 511 ________________ DWM, 5 3 , SECURE PROFESSIONAL W/ varied interests. Looking for a full-fig ured, active tomboy to share outdoor activities, the seasons & smiles. Box

512_______________________________ MONTPELIER SWM, 4 2 , 6’, 200 LBS., loves Prine, Rush, Brown, redheads, Orientals, walks, cuddling, basketball, cooking, eBay, attending auctions, comedy, theater, fairs, cruises. Must have direction & like to drive! Box 514 SWM, 3 8 , MANLY, NOT MACHO, sensi tive, not a wimp. Contemplative, fun, intellectual, witty, polite, open-minded conservative. ISO adult, bright, femi nine woman to share traditional values, mutual passions and LTR. Box 499 PENURIUS WORKAHOLIC WITH WORTHY dreams, 45 , seeks private, deep cat & plant owner for original aesthetic min gling. It’s a beautiful life for friendship, affection and mirth. Box 498

2993____________________________

THE ORCHID, FRIDAY. YOU: OFFICE EnvironmentsC??), dark hair, white Tshirt. Me: Dirty blonde, tall. I did a big double-take and you caught me! Are you available? Interested? 2979

Bi-CURIOUS DWM, 40s, slim, gentle sin cere, climber, skier, long brown hair, br. eyes, intuitive, open mind, free spirit, mellow, mystical. Longing for relaxed, intimate exp. w/ receptive CU. 2879

PERHAPS LOVE! Intelligent, handsome, fit SWM, 35 , in California correctional facility for non-violent crime, ISO woman who is kind, caring, trim, nonjudgmental, humorous & optimistic. Box 500_____________________________

GWF, 60, LOOKING FOR YOUNGER GWF, NS, who is clean, honest, with a good sense of humor. Who likes cuddling, quiet times, dancing & traveling. LTR possible w/ right person. Box 493

GENTLE MAN, DWM STARTING OVER, honest and caring ISO middle-age lady who wants to be understood, respect ed and loved. Enjoy the outdoors and taking time to smell the flowers this time around. Box 502_________________

m m M sd iin n m m SAGE 81 HOMEBREW, SPIRIT 8l HANDrolled smokes. Minimalist, artist, gar dener, skier, computer graphics major ISO aggressive souls for romp 8. rave in VT. Wilds. Box 518 ______________ _

WELL-TRAINED, DOMESTICATED, DWM, 29, ND, blue-eyed, hopeless romantic ISO S/DPF w/ children for LTR. My true love is out there, is it you? Box 506

GWM, 40S, 6’i n, 170 LBS., M A SC, muse., lean, spare, coll, edu., travelled, bike, hike, swimaholic, expert mechan ic, honest, trusting, kind, com passion ate. ISO same, athletic, NS, ND, share good times and bad. Box 508

AFFECTIONATE, ATTRACTIVE, TALL, FIT dad, 3 1 , goal-oriented, positive, own business, country life, occasional 420 , mtn. biking, camping, hockey. Love lit tle people? Smile? Sometimes silly? Let’s express w/ pen then. Box 495

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YOUNGER DUDE, 40S, SEEKS OLDER, 55 -65 , horny woman for erotic encoun ters. We deserve a treat today. Photo? Box 5 1 6 _____________________

HELLO, LADIES OUT THERE. I would love to hear from you all!! I’m so easy to get along with, and loving, caring, sweet, charming, honest, friendly and lots more of a person. Box 517 _______

INTIMATE FRIENDSHIP SOUGHT OUT BY attractive SW M, 6’2 ”, 185 lbs., br./bl. ISO mature, sexy WF, 40-60, for dining out, walks 8l talks, holding hands, ten der kisses, warm embraces... Box 515

ATTRACTIVE, CARING, ND/NS SGWPF, 34, ISO NS/ND SGF, attractive, caring, feminine, who enjoys outdoor activi ties, dancing, romance, movies, and values honesty, communication, com mitments, friendship & LTR. Box 491

4 digit box numbers can be contacted either through voice mail or by letter. 3 digit box numbers can only be contacted by letter. Send letter along w/ $5 to PO Box 1164, Burlington, VT 05402 LO V E IN C Y B E R S P A C E . P O IN T Y O U R W E B B R O W S E R TO

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Two FREE w eeks for: I SPY OTHER j ~ l C H ECK H E R E IF YO U ’ D P R E F E R “ LETTERS O N LY”

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