Saying “I Do”

Your ceremony is the start of something beautiful. It not only kicks off the biggest party of your life once you say “I do,” but it also ignites a new adventure for you and your soon-to-be spouse – no matter how long you have been together. Here are some details to think about while planning the perfect beginning.

Find more wedding preparation tips and ideas at Black Hills Bride online.

officiant or clergy

First, discuss your beliefs with your fiancé to ensure that the ceremony is meaningful to both of you. If you follow a particular faith, you and your partner may want to consider a religious ceremony in a house of worship, church or temple. The other option would be a civil ceremony (in accordance with state laws) that has a judge, justice of the peace, county clerk or officiant to solemnize your nuptials.

Once you both decide what kind of ceremony you would like to have, make a list and start meeting with officiants and pastors. Look for the perfect person to solemnize your wedding, making sure your personalities, values and beliefs blend well together.

After deciding on your officiant, ask for help in creating the type of ceremony you would like to have – a service unique to you and your spouse. For instance, a casual, outdoor wedding might require different components than a formal, religious ceremony in a church.

Legacy Photo and Design

preparing for forever

Your wedding preparations should also include preparing for a lifetime together. Premarital counseling and education has proven to significantly reduce the divorce rate (30-40%) and increase the quality of your intimate relationship. Create a strong foundation, not only for your wedding day, but for your new adventure together as a married couple.

Choose a program that covers effective communication, barriers in your relationship and successfully easing tension with conflict management.

Counseling will also help you understand each of your histories and how to work with them toward health and healing. You will also work through money matters and leisure time, as well as sexuality and intimacy myths and truths. You’ll learn how to stay connected and achieve your marital expectations, dreams and goals together while communicating with one another effectively.

Although there may be hesitation at the beginning when mentioning counseling, it is a step in your wedding planning that you will be glad you chose to take part in.

vows that wow

Your vows are not something that you recite and repeat at your ceremony. This is the most important promise you’ll ever make to each other, so it should reflect your feelings and beliefs. Traditional vows have been repeated for centuries and give some couples a sense of permanence after reciting them.

An alternative is creating your own vows. Before you opt for this approach, check with your officiant to see if they are okay with it. Once you’ve got the thumbsup, begin by looking for inspiration and settling on a format and tone with your fiancé. After the details are chosen, write it all out – including moments from your relationship and promises you will make to your partner for the new adventure ahead.

Sundance Girl Photography

readings to remember

Many couples choose to have a scripture passage or quotes read at their ceremony. Here are a couple of ideas that are sure to leave your guests inspired.

“But ‘God made them male and female’ from the beginning of creation. ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” Mark 10:6–9 (NLT)

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not selfseeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 1 Cor. 13:4–7 (NIV)

unity symbols

wine blend

While the bride pours a white wine, the groom pours a red – making a unique blush wine that can be enjoyed after the wedding day.

sand ceremony

Two smaller vessels filled with different colored sand pour into a central vessel.

cord of three strands

The bride and groom braid three strands together symbolizing the union of God, husband and wife.

a box of love letters

Place love letters into a box to be read to one another when times get tough.

avoid disaster

Take religious restrictions seriously. Meet with your officiant one to two months after getting engaged. Your ceremony venue may have rules on premarital counseling, reciting vows, attire and music restrictions.

R. Becker Creative

what to ask:

• Are you available on my wedding date? What time?

• How much do you charge?

• Are there extra fees for travel?

• How long have you been performing weddings?

• What are your credentials?

• How long is your average wedding ceremony?

• Can we write our own vows? If so, will you help us create them?

• Will you give a sermon or a speech? Can we see it beforehand?

• Can you give us an overview of the service?

• Do you have any restrictions we should know about?

• Will you perform the ceremony outside?

• Will you attend the rehearsal?

• Will you be joining us at the reception?

• What is expected of us in terms of pre-marital classes?

• How many pre-wedding meetings will we have with you?