What’s Better, Thick or Thin? Not an Easy Question if You’re Hmong-American

BY MAI CHONG VANG YOUTH REPORTERS

Like many other Hmong people living in Fresno, my family believes that a person’s physical and emotional condition – physical appearance, actions, attitudes, emotions, and perspectives – are a reflection of that person’s spirit. Which explains why my family has always been concerned about me.

The issue began at birth. I weighed only 6 pounds and 3 ounces -- much too small.

As a child, my parents urged me to eat more. I was always the last one to finish eating dinner, as my mother sat across the table waiting and watching to make sure I’d clean my plate.

In my early teens I became aware that not everyone held the same notions as my traditional parents or Hmong elders, when it came to judging the human body. In fact, my American girlfriends at school strived for the exact opposite -- they always wanted to be thinner and thinner.

I can recall overhearing my parents talk about my male cousins’ brides. If she were thick, they would happily describe her as stunning and strong. But if she were thin, they would describe her as scrawny, or not so attractive. From their perspective, thicker girls were healthier, with a greater potential to do physical labor and produce healthy children.

Because both Hmong and American cultures influence me, I am impacted by each set of expectations and throughout my life I’ve tried to figure out what’s right for me. At the moment, I feel like society is accepting me the way I am. I’m no longer super slender or petite, but I feel healthy. If I were any smaller, though, my parents would judge me and convince me to eat more.

Either way, I should be the one to decide what makes me happy and proud of myself. My body shouldn’t grow or shrink based on the expectations of others, whether Hmong or American.

Mai Chong Vang, who prefers to go by Chonny, lives in east-central Fresno and is a student at Edison High School. This commentary also ran on KVPR’s Valley Edition on February 4, 2014.