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November here we come! It is hard to believe that we only have a couple of months left of 2016. On November 6th our “time” will be wonky though, as we change our clocks at the end of Daylight Savings Time. It is the time of year to replace the batteries on smoke and carbon dioxide detectors. Don’t forget to put the emergency winter kit back in the vehicle. We all need to start to think about upcoming holiday plans, and realize that if we have any weather warm enough to ride, that by late afternoon the temperature is falling rapidly. Winter is upon us, so plan accordingly. Get the bikes ready, start your tear down for the winter, get your bike to the shop or painter, and get this stuff done early so that you are ready for spring in a few short months. We cannot change the time or the speed that it passes, so we best just enjoy the ride as well as we can. Look for the good, create good of your own when you have a chance, and just take a moment once in a while to realize that life is only temporary. Some things that may seem like a big deal today are nothing to even worry about tomorrow. Live the life that you want, make the choices that you want to make, and accept the responsibility of those decisions. Try to make an effort to realize that others have a different perspective than us, and that we cannot change their opinions. Respect others, and demand respect from them, and just live your own life. Why this is of particular importance this month is that we have a major election on the 8th. If you are legally able to do so, get out and vote. Accept this as part of your civic duty, and get to the polling places. I know who I am voting for,

but I have no care or concerns for who you are voting for, only that you accept the responsibility of casting your vote. Don’t let politics end friendships and families. Make your choices, live with your choices, and respect others opinions. We The People, still have the ability to cast our votes for the candidates that we choose in large part to the men and women of the United States Military. These folks have paved the way for many of our freedoms, and have never done anything to take any of those away from us. A few short days after the election is over, is Veterans Day. Friday November 11th is a day put aside to show your respect for those that have served our great nation. On this day, fly your flags, STAND for the National Anthem, and shake hands and thank every Veteran that you see that day. Show your patriotism, which in turn shows support for those that have ensured our ability to live as free as possible.

November brings another Holiday that is very important, Thanksgiving Day! All holidays, with Thanksgiving being no exception, are all in what you make of them. This day to me is a time to reflect upon all that I am thankful for. There is so much that I cannot even come close to mentioning it all here, but want to make a few special mentions. I am thankful for my family. Melanie and the kids sure make the day to day interesting and enjoyable. These guys are my rock and I love them dearly. With MJ comes a cool batch of In-Laws as well! Thankful that these folks accept me into their flock and especially thankful that FIL Mike got a different set of lungs, and will be ready to ride by spring! I am also thankful for my TRMI Family. We could not do this every month if it was not for them, and each and every one of them brings a special kind of cool to the table. I am also very thankful of the sponsors, supporters, and readers of the magazine. Without all of you, this would all be for naught. Thanks everyone for Tony, Graig, Pete, and Cameron are hanging out with being a part of our lives and making life more interesting! the Cedar Rapids downtown in the background for this November Cover. They want to wish everyone Ride into the holidays! a Happy Thanksgiving and tell everyone they are thankful for keeping IowaBikerLawyers.com on the Vernon and Melanie tips of your fingers for your legal needs. Based in Cedar Rapids, but active across the entire State of Quote of the Month: “On this Veterans Day, let us Iowa, they can help you in your time of legal need. remember the service of our veterans, and let us renew our Leehey Olson Law, PC are THE Iowa Biker Lawyers national promise to fulfill our sacred obligations to our veterans and their families who have sacrificed so much so and have been for more than 30 years. that we can live free.” Dan Lipinski Ring them 877-209-9452 or IowaBikerLawyers.com Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook www.thunderroadsiowa.com 4 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

On the Cover


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CMA Notes

with him.

We aren’t any different. It’s just not funny in real life like it was in the movie. We’re all busy focusing on the things that make us feel good about ourselves rather than focusing Well, here I am writing on what God says will make us be good for others. Our for the November issue struggle to prove our own significance takes over our lives. and hoping we still have Instead of using some of our money to “care for orphans some of those golden and widows in their distress” as James 1:27 tells us to do, weekend days for riding we indulge ourselves in the latest and greatest of everything like we have in the past. until we’re up to our eyebrows in credit card debt. Instead I remember one year of whispering a quick prayer that the Lord will help us to when it was nice enough be “peace loving and gentle at all times” (James 3:17) at to enjoy a ride down to the beginning of a disagreement, we rip into our family Quincy on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. It sure members, leaving them in pain and looking for the quickest route of escape. But we tell ourselves that now they know beat fighting the crowds who is boss. at the mall! Just in case you’re reading this before Election Day, don’t forget Hebrews 12:1 & 2 tell us how to focus on the right goal to get out there and vote instead of the on the fluff. “Therefore . . . let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so on November 8th. This year, more than ever, we easily trips us up. And let us run . . . the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the need to look carefully champion who initiates and perfects our faith.” When Jesus at what is at stake. The long-term consequences lived on earth, he was focused on completing the plan God the Father had laid out for him. That plan included Jesus’ are enormous. Voters will have to give up a lot death in exchange for our ability to live for God, forgiven of sin. of what’s on their fluffy wish-lists and focus on defending the rights and We often can’t lay aside the fluff for ourselves, much less freedoms that we haven’t for someone else the way Jesus did. He can surely be trusted to help us sort out our lives so we can focus on already lost. what’s important. Just ask him. It’s amazing how Blessings to you all – Karla the threat of losing something important can Mark and Karla Cornick are Area Reps with the Christian really focus a person. For instance, when a little Motorcyclists Association. Find out more about CMA and God’s plan for you at www.cmausa.org. old lady starts to make a left-hand turn right in front of you, you’re not thinking, “Rats! I wish I had gotten those new billeted floor boards put on this morning before I left home.” No, you’re focused on executing every last riding trick you’ve ever learned in hopes of getting the bike stopped so you won’t end up as a hood ornament. In a life or death situation it becomes obvious very quickly what is important and what is just fluff.

Most of the time though we’re more like Steve Martin in the movie “The Jerk”. Anyone remember the scene where he was leaving and he declared that although he didn’t NEED anything, he wasn’t going without the ashtray? “And that’s all!” he said. But that wasn’t enough. There was the paddle game, the remote control, the lamp . . . Pretty soon he was shuffling out of the house, pants around his ankles, arms full of unimportant junk, all just to prove the point that he didn’t need anybody. He was focused on the wrong thing, so he ended up choosing the wrong things to take 6 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

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The Biker Friendly Business Directory is a list of establishments throughout Iowa that sponsor the magazine. You can pick up your copy here every month. Let them know that you saw them in TRMI. If your business would like to advertise in Thunder Roads Iowa Biker Friendly Business Listing and become a part of the network, please email vernon@thunderroadsiowa.com

Biker Accessories CoolBikerStuff.com 1606 P Avenue Milford, Iowa 51351 877-816-2200 Follow us on Facebook!! Crispy’s Biker Apparel Cedar Rapids, Iowa Find Us On Facebook 319-241-0916

Churches Rebels In His Hands 600 16th Avenue Council Bluffs, Iowa Mark and Lora Schiller Pastors 712-329-9901

Dealers

Edwards Motorsports and RV’s 1010 34th Avenue Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712-366-8400 fullthrottleia.com or edwardsrvs.com

Uptown Motors Sales, Inc 310 Cleveland St Muscatine, IA 52761 563-263-2944 www.uptownmotorsales.com

Barney’s 203 S Mill Street Wadena, Iowa 52169 563-774-2525 Barney’s Wadena on Facebook

Ernie’s Harley-Davidson 2613 Hwy 18 East Algona, IA 50511 515-295-7951 www.erniesharley.com

Whipp Sales and Service, Inc 701 S 8th Street Clarinda, Iowa 51632 1.800.477.0195 www.whippsalesandserv.com

Baxa’s Sutliff Store & Tavern 5546 130th Street NE Lisbon 319-624-2204 Cold Beer, Delicious Food, Good Music & Great Times!

Fenders Cycle and Motorsport 1500 E Army Post Road Des Moines, Iowa 50315 515-256-9062 www.fenderscycle.com

Wiebler’s Harley-Davidson 5320 Corporate Park Drive Davenport, IA 52807 563-355-6437 www.wieblers.com

Bill’s Boat Landing Clayton, Iowa 563-964-2112 Check Us Out on Facebook Where the River is Calling & You Must Go!

Fenders Honda 100 South 16th Street Ames, Iowa 50010 info@fendershonda.com 515-233-4727

Zylstra Harley-Davidson 1930 E 13th Street Ames, Iowa 50010 515-232-6223 zylstrahd.com

Bootleggers of Millville Awesome Stop, Great Staff, Fantastic Food Tops in Scenic River Rides Check us on Facebook 563-252-7775

Heartland Harley-Davidson 117 S. Roosevelt Ave Burlington, Iowa 52601 www.heartlandhd.com 319-754-1100

Entertainment

Buck Snort 113 4th Street Neola, Iowa 51559 712-485-9090 The Buck Snort on Facebook

Loess Hills Harley-Davidson 57408 190th Street Pacific Junction IA 51561 712-622-4000 loesshillshd.com McGrath Dubuque Harley-Davidson 145 N Crescent Rdg Dubuque, IA 52003 563-557-3735 www.dubuqueharley-davidson.com

Baxter Cycle 311 4th Street Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2351 www.baxtercycle.com

McGrath Hawkeye Harley-Davidson 120 Westcor Drive Coralville, IA 52241 319- 545.7495 www.hawkeyehd.com

Big Barn Harley-Davidson 81 NW 49th Place Des Moines, Iowa 50313 515-265-4444 www.bigbarnhd.net

Metro Harley-Davidson 2415 Westdale Drive SW Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52404 319-362-9496 www.metro-motorsports.com

Brenny’s Motorcycle Clinic 4426 State Street Bettendorf, IA 52722 (563)359-7222 www.BRENNYS.com

Nishna Valley Cycle HONDA – YAMAHA – KTM Atlantic, Iowa 50022 1-888-577-6406 www.nishnavalleycycle.com

C&C Custom Cycle 130 E Lincoln Chariton, Iowa 50049 641-774-7494 www.cc-cycle.com

Okoboji Harley-Davidson 1005 Eastview Avenue Okoboji IA, 51355 712-332-7700 www.erniesharley.com

Carroll Cycle Center 1327 Plaza Dr Carroll, Iowa 712-792-1610 www.carrollcycle.com

Route 65 Harley-Davidson 1300 S Jefferson Way Indianola, Iowa 50125 515.962.2160 www.route65hd.net

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Book Em Dano’s 33 S Main Street Denison, Iowa 51442 712-263-9818Mon-Sat 4-2 Dancers Nightly 5-1:30 Celebrations DJ & Karaoke Services Newton, IA 641-521-8036 Any Occasion /Rally or Event EmCee Facebook/Ray Johansen(Celebrations) Specializing in Weddings & Receptions National Motorcycle Museum 102 Chamber Drive Anamosa, Iowa 52205 319-462-3925 Nationalmcmuseum.org Okoboji Classic Cars Museum and Restoration Shop 810 Jeppeson Road West Okoboji, Iowa 51351 712-332-8029

Food and Drink American Legion Post 111 1101 W 4th Street S Newton 641-792-3353 Open to the Public Newtonamericanlegion111.org Amigo’s 280 North 1st Street Fort Dodge, Iowa 50501 515-576-0142 Amigosfortdodge.com Bailey’s Pub -N- Grub 918 E Euclid Ave Des Moines 515-266-6560 Mon-Sat 6am-2am Sun 8am-12am Home Cooked Food

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Buck Snort 310 Dr Van Zee Road Oakland, Iowa 51560 712-355-5315 C&L Sandbar 103 North Noyes Street Mondamin, IA 51557 712-646-2300 or 712-216-0975 Hours Daily 11-close Catfish Charlie’s On the Mississippi River 1630 E. 16th Street Dubuque, IA 52001 (563)582-8600 www.CatfishCharliesDubuque.com Desperados 105 E 5th Street Atlantic 712-243-7087 Home of Cold Beer, Good Times, Pizza & Wings Dirty Ernies 201 1st Street NE Farley, Iowa 563-744-4653 Ride your Harley to Farley! Durango Depot 736 Burtons Furnace Road Open 3 to close Best Scenic Road With the Best Food! 563-552-2291 Ferg’s Bar & Grill 806 Hwy 30 Grand Junction, Iowa 50107 515-738-5416 Where Good Friends Meet

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Fro’s Pub ‘N Grub 309 Cedar St, Wilton 563-732-3977 Fro’s Pub n Grub on Facebook A Surprise Around Every Corner

Midway Tavern 206 1st Street Soldier, Iowa 712-884-2230 www.midwaytavernsoldier.com

Scooters on Broadway 475 NE Broadway Des Moines, Iowa 515-288-1053 scootersonbroadway@hotmail.com

The Roadhouse 105 Washington Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2272 Home of the Marne Burger

Goozman’s Westside Bar & Grill 1019 7th St Harlan, Iowa 712-755-2259 Goozman’s Westside on Facebook

Minden Bowl Café & Lounge 209 Broadway Street Minden, Iowa 51553 712-483-2937 Minden Bowl on Facebook

Screaming Eagle American Bar & Grill 228 East 4th Street Waterloo, Iowa 50703 319-235-8865 www.partyattheeagle.com

The Sawmill Bar & Grill Now with a Full Menu 401 Main St New Market, IA 51646-3079 712-585-3601

Haverhill Social Club 202 1st Street Haverhill, Iowa 50120 641-475-3321 Mon-Sat 10-2, Sun 12-12

Montgomery Street Pub 207 East Montgomery Street Creston, Iowa 50801 641-782-2165

Shooters Bar 661 Main Anita, Iowa 712-249-7370 Mon-Fri 3:00-Close Sat-Sun 10:00-Close

Thirsty’s on 3rd 2202 W 3rd, Davenport 563-424-1143 Follow Us on Facebook Daily Thirst Quenching Deals

Mudders in Minburn Coldest Beer in Dallas County Bar Food-Wings-Pizza-ETC 515-897-9223 Open M-Sun 11AM Facebook Mudders

Sidetracked 206 West Union Street Creston, Iowa 50801 641-782-8534

T.J.’s Pourhouse 100 E. Washington Street Exira, Iowa 50076 712-268-2353 Open M-SAT.@11, SUN.@ NOON

Papa Joe’s 117 South 6th Street Missouri Valley, Iowa 51555 712-642-9015

Sparetime Bar & Grill 136 West Main Street Ute, Iowa 61060 712-885-2226

Pearl Street Social Club 110 Pearl Street SW Shellsburg, Iowa 52332 319-436-7100 Find Us On Facebook!

Sportsman Bar & Grill 103 1st Street Pisgah, Iowa 51564 712-456-2222 FOOD, FUEL, FUN

Pines Steakhouse Oinkers Lounge & Grill

Hawkeye Bar & Grill 110 North 4th Street Mapleton, IA 51034 712-882-1226 Mon-Sat 10:30 a.m. ~ Sun 12:00 p.m. Hog Stop BBQ 2327 S. 24th Street Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712-EAT-BBQS Hog Stop BBQ on Facebook Iron Saddle Saloon 39 S Main Street Dayton, Iowa 50530 515-547-3311 J.R. Willie’s Gateway to the Beautiful Hill Country Colesburg, IA 563-856-5095 Open Daily Mon-Sun 11AM Home of the Willie Whopper

1500 E 7th Street Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-243-3606 M-F 11AM-, S-S 4PM-

Stumpy’s Bar & Grill 423 Main Street Duncombe, Iowa 50532 515-543-4222 Stumpy’s Bar & Grill on Facebook

Jerrys 100 W Washington Exira, Iowa 50076 Jerrys Exira on Facebook “The Party Lives On”

Pizza Ranch DENISON 510 HWY 39 North Denison, Iowa 712-393-3333 Check Us Out on Facebook Open 7 Days a Week

Suds –N- Jugs Bar & Grill 807 Iowa Avenue Onawa, Iowa 51040 712-433-4880 Nightly Food Specials

Just 1 More 515-570-4206 403 3rd Ave Under the Water Tower Jamaica, Iowa

Pizza Ranch HARLAN 613 Court Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-755-2262 Check Us Out on Facebook Open 7 Days a Week

Knickers Saloon 2186 Central Avenue Dubuque, Iowa 52001 563-557-0887 365 Days a Year Knickers Saloon on Facebook

Red Oak Tap 419 E. Reed Red Oak, Iowa 51566 712-623-4788

Knuckleheads Anamosa, IA 319-462-2724 Like on FB Knuckleheads Pub & Grub Open M-F 11-2, S-S 10-2 The Knucklehead Burger “Git IT IN YA”

Riverside Tavern 450 E Main St Lehigh, Iowa 50557 515-359-9998 Email:riversidetap@gmail.com

Lampe’s Pub 608 Iowa Avenue Dunlap, Iowa 51529 712-643-5781 Open 7 days a week at 11 AM

Sambetti’s Bar and Grill 1430 2nd Avenue Des Moines, Iowa 50314 515-245-9780 Mon-Sat 11a-2a, Sun 11a-7p

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The Back Forty 317 Main St. Macedonia, Iowa 51549 712-486-2687 facebook.com/thebackforty

Tobey Jacks Mineola Steak House Mineola, Iowa 712-526-2078 Open 7 Days a Week Check Us Out on Facebook Uncle Harley’s Bar & Grill 202 W Mayne, Blue Grass (563)381-1717 Great Pizza & Food Bikers ALWAYS Welcome Vic’s Main Tap 304 Broadway Audubon, Iowa 50025 712-563-2122 Opens M-F 3, Sat 10, Sun 3 Whitetails Bar & Grill 101 N. Main St. Marble Rock IA,50653 641-397-9900 Mon.- Sat. 7am breakfast -2am Close www.whitetailsbarandgrill.com Wilson’s Tap and Recreation 1008 Story Street Boone, Iowa 50036/ 515-433-1395

The Home Plate Diner 304 E. 30th Street Des Moines, Iowa 50317 515-262-7000

Guns and Ammo

The Lounge 1005 Chatburn Ave Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-755-5050 The Lounge Harlan Iowa on Facebook

2A Firearms Training Training to Protect Your 2nd Ammendment Rights 641-439-6660 Craig.2aft@gmail.com

The Place2B! 116 N. Federal Ave Mason City, IA 50401 M-F 3p-2a S-S Noon-2a Find Us On Facebook

McCunn Specialty Firearms 74980 Richland Road Massena, Iowa 50853 www.mccunnsguns.com 712-779-GUNS

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Pistol Pete’s Guns and Ammo Eldora, Iowa 641-858-6878 pistolpetesgunsandammo@gmail.com DISCOUNTS for ABATE Members Eric Ross & Steve Eggleston

Guthrie Center, Iowa 50115 641-747-3344 www.brubakercomputer.com

Des Moines, Iowa 50314 cycleclinicdm.com 515-288-6954

CJ Now Plumbing Sewer & Water Specialists 309-786-2002 Serving the Quad Cities Area On Call 24-7

F & J Racing 701 N 3rd Ave Marshalltown, Iowa 50158 641-752-8651 www.fandjracing.com

Matt McCall Insurance Agency State Farm Insurance 102 East South St, Tipton 563-886-6120 www.mattmccall.net

Hoker Trucking NOW HIRING Dixon, Iowa Hokertucking.com 563-843-2763

Machine Shop 6821 Fleur Drive Des Moines, Iowa 50321 515-285-4332 RIDE SAFE

Oakland Insurance Agency Motorcycle, Home, AUTO, Commercial, Life, Health Specializing in Teen Drivers Shane Baker 712-310-7475 shane@oaklandins.com

Irwin Locker & Catering 502 Ann Street Irwin, Iowa 51446 712-782-3215 irwinlocker@gmail.com

Motorcycle Medic 3176 Highway 30 Woodbine, Iowa 51579 712-647-2818 Open Tues-Sat Noon-6PM

I n s u r a nc e

Legal

Sandbothe Firestone 1106 Main Street Griswold, Iowa 51535 712-778-2223 Sandbothe Firestone on Facebook

Hupy and Abraham sc, pc Lawyers for Bikers 800.800.5678 Hupy.com

Southwest Iowa Sandblasting Mike Magers 65162 Oxford Rd Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-249-3995

IowaBikerLawyers.com Leehey Olson Law, PC Riding & Defending Your Rights for Over 30 Years 877-209-9452

Shops & Fabricators

Photo and Art

Bent Wrench Cycles 911 7th Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-235-2453 Bent Wrench Cycles on Facebook

Ullrich Photography PO Box 1842 Clinton, Iowa 52733 563-243-8715 www.natanic.com

Butterfield’s M.C. Parts 8025 Blondo Street Omaha, NE 68134 402-391-3768

Services

Chuck’s Cycle Service and Repair S&S and Drag Specialties Dealer 714 East 7th Street Washington, Iowa52353 319-461-5278

A+ Affordable Heat, Air, Refrigeration & Geo Thermal 22274 Old Lincoln Hwy Crescent, Iowa 51526 712-329-9901

Creative Concepts Collision 422 Market Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712.755.2231

BCS Computers 100 Industrial Road

Cycle Clinic 2209 ML King Pkwy

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Nelson Machine & Forge General Machining, Ornamental Iron, Weld/Fab 70 Washington Street Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2220

SS Collision, Cycle Works & Graphics 2902 11th Ave SW Spencer, Iowa 51301 712-262-3959 www.sscollision.com Steffens Cycle Shop LLC 1311 E 7th Street Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-243-3076M-F 9-5 Most Sat 9-12 Or Call

Tattoo Skin Mechanix INKorpar8ted 117 No. 16th Street Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712 256-2847 Check Us Out on Facebook

Vape

Pike Run Services 320 Main Nichols, Iowa 52766 Shop 319-723-4244 Cell 319-330-4541

The Fog Zone Vape Store 420 Chestnut Street Atlantic, Iowa, 50025 Facebook.com/fogzonestore 712-243-4024

Road Rage BikeWorks 401 High Street Avoca, Iowa 51521 712-307-6111 Road Rage BikeWorks on Facebook

To buy ad space for your business or service in our directory, give us call at 712-249-5630 or email vernon@ thunderroadsiowa.com

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99 Counties to tour on the bike, 99 counties to tour, take one down, drive on around, 22 counties to tour on the bike. A few years back, a summer riding goal was to ride through each one of the counties of Iowa, and what was found was a wealth of interest and beauty. Each month we will revisit each county as a featured article. We will tell you about new things to see, places to ride, and give you a little spark of touring curiosity for our state of Iowa. Pottawattamie County

you grab a bite when you pass through. A short jaunt down G18 took us into Neola. Neola is home to Arrowhead Park. The park consists of 147 acres of family fun, and the perfect destination for anyone wishing to spend time in nature. Arrowhead has a wealth of fishing, camping and outdoor recreation opportunities, including a playground, basketball and volleyball courts, woodland hiking trails and wildlife viewing. Besides the great outdoor adventure opportunities, Neola also produced two professional baseball players, Red Downs and Red Morgan.

Pottawattamie County is located in south western Iowa, and has a population of approximately 93,000 people. The county covers 959 miles, and it shares its eastern border with the Missouri River. The county gets its name from the Potawatomi Native American tribe and the county seat is Council Bluffs.

From Neola you can jump on the big road over to Underwood, or stick with the scenic route down highway 191. East of Underwood lie Crescent and Honey Creek. In Crescent you will find a couple of great stops for food and drink, like The Pink Poodle. A+ Affordable Heating and Air Conditioning makes its home in There are a lot of cool things to see and some great Crescent, and roads to travel in Pottawattamie County, and we started nearby you our tour close to home by heading down highway will also find 83 into the town of Avoca. Avoca is home to 1,500 Mt Crescent. residents, and its downtown area boasts small town Mt Crescent values. There are several places on the main drag to offers skiing grab a bite to eat or a cold drink. And for any twoin the winter wheeled needs, you can stop on by Road Rage Bike season and zip lines Works. Tyler Griffen and crew can help you out with in the summer. The all your bike needs in the Avoca area. Avoca is also Screaming Eagle Zip home to Farmall Land USA, a museum for International Line is the longest tractors and equipment ran by the Mez’, longtime IH zip line in Iowa and dealers in the areas. Side note, Avoca was actually the Nebraska and one home of Johnny Carson until his family relocated to of the longest in the Norfolk, Nebraska. entire USA. The zip line ride is 5 football From Avoca we headed east to the tiny burg of Minden. fields long and dual Minden is home to just under 600 residents, and the best place around for bowling and burgers. Minden bowl cannot be beat if you’re looking for a great meal or a cold beer. You may remember the mention of their fabulous food and stellar staff in a previous issue in the Will Ride to Eat article…still accurate. Make sure

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side by side lines reach speeds of over 40mph! A great day we visited. If place to check out whether you prefer you speed up in you want to grab the air or on the ground! something to eat while in the Metro Leaving Crescent you can swing by McClelland if area, don’t forget the mood strikes, or head straight into Council Bluffs, to stop by Hog Stop the county seat. Council Bluffs is home to the largest BBQ at 2327 S 24th population in Street, good food, at Pottawattamie cold drinks, and great wa a County. Council people! Lake Manawa e Bluffs is located is an excellent place on the east bank for outdoor activities like swimming, fishing, of the Missouri and boating. If you are in the Lake Manawa area, be River, across from sure to swing by Edwards Motor Sports and RV. You what is now the can find all of their pertinent information in out biker much larger city of friendly listing each month. Council Bluffs is also home Omaha, Nebraska. to an old urban legend that has spanned the decades… Council Bluffs The Black Angel in Fairview Cemetery. The angel is was known as actually a memorial to Ruth Anne Dodge, the wife of Kanesville, Iowa General Dodge, and is a beautiful sight to behold. If until 1852. Council you are roaming around the metro area, be sure to Bluffs’ population swing by Skin Mechanix Tattoo and see Jose. He and is approximately his artists would love to hook you up with some chair 63,000 and along time and expand your personal skin canvas. with neighboring Omaha to the From the metro area we jumped on highway 92 and west, Council headed west towards Treynor and Carson. Carson is Bluffs is part of home to CIB, a family run local brewery, and a nice the 60th-largest place to stop for a cold one. From Carson, it is just a metropolitan area short jaunt over to Oakland, where our friend Bud is in the United States. often found serving up some killer grub at The Buck Council Bluffs is Snort. Family friendly as well as fully stocked with more than a decade cold drinks, it is a favorite on our list. He has another older than Omaha. location in Pottawatomie county as well a the original Omaha was founded Neola location. After stuffing ourselves to the point of in 1854 by Council food coma status, we cruised through Walnut on our Bluffs businessmen and way home. A nice local bar, and a fabulous bakery on speculators following main street, Walnut is the epitome of small town values. the Kansas-Nebraska All around, Pottawattamie County is close to home, and Act, has since grown has a lot of beautiful roads for riding, and great places to be the significantly to hang out with friends and family. Historic treasures larger one of the two abound as well. Well worth the trip and a great path to cities. Council Bluffs follow on your fall leaf rides. is home to a plethora of things to do and Next month we will travel to the opposite end of our see. If you are in town great state and see what Poweshiek County can offer on a weekend, you can the TRMI crew. attend Sunday service at the Rebels in His Melanie J Schwarte Hands Church on 16th Melanie@thunderroadsiowa.com Avenue. If you are Sources available upon request sightseeing, then locally you can check out The Bayliss Park Fountain and Monuments, Lewis and Clark Monument and Scenic Overlook, and Squirrel Cage Jail are just a few of the cool places to visit. In fact, there was a paranormal investigation occurring at the jail on the Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook

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I had a rant put together, but I’m going to shift gears a little this month, and address a growing trend that seems to be getting popular. Most of my rants have been about what I see from behind the fairing of my bagger, but this is completely off track from that. Remember, this is my opinion, agree or disagree, it’s cool. Here we go. Lately I have been seeing a trend in a certain professional sports community of sitting, kneeling, or raising fists during the playing of the national anthem at the start of the game. The first time I saw it, I was certain the individual involved, simply was pre occupied by something else; but I was wrong. More and more of these “pro”(as in professional) athletes are joining in on this. I’m not going to get in to the reasons why they are doing it, I’d rather let everyone know my thoughts on this whole display. Buckle up... this is gonna get wild. The flag, the national anthem, the pledge of allegiance, the bald eagle are all symbols of this country that mean a lot to me. By disrespecting any of these symbols, you disrespect me and every man or woman who ever put on the uniform of the military branches of the United States of America; including those who did return and those which did not. The families, fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, brothers, and sisters of those who served, are all dishonored because some over paid “pro” athlete, who makes millions of dollars every year, is having a tantrum. It has become a trend that in my opinion is going to be the demise of the league involved. For those of you that do not know, we have a flag code, stating how we as Americans, are to conduct ourselves during the national anthem. Conduct During Playing: During a rendition of the national anthem: When the flag is displayed: 1. individuals in uniform should give the military salute at the first note of the anthem and maintain that position until the last note; 2. members of the Armed Forces and veterans who are present but not in uniform may render the military salute in the manner provided for individuals in uniform; and 3. all other persons present should face the flag and stand at attention with their right hand over the heart, and men not in uniform, if applicable, should remove their headdress with their right hand and hold it at the left shoulder, the hand being over the heart; and 4. when the flag is not displayed, all present should face toward the music and act in the same manner they would if the flag were displayed Looks plain and simple to me. I know what the First 18 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

Amendment states, so no need to lecture on that. This is not First Amendment, this is a bunch of whiny, overpaid, punks who are using the First Amendment as a cop out to act like morons. Remember the movie The Longest Yard? Remember the message sent to the quarterback when he tried to throw the game? That is what we need here. I will throw down a challenge for anyone attending these games. Grab a hand full of hair and help these boys to their feet. Once the anthem is over, assist them back to the ground. I am sick of seeing the symbols of this great country used as pawns in a temper tantrum. I for one am not going to stand by and dismiss it as First Amendment. Any act that I feel is disrespectful to the flag, the pledge of allegiance, the national anthem, or any symbol that represents this country, witnessed by me in person, will be met with a stern warning from me. I’ll let you imagine what I mean by stern. I gave 6 years to this country; many have given so much more. Ungrateful, over paid, whining punks, have neither the courage, nor understanding of what that means.Yeah you have the right to your opinion, a so do I and millions of pissed off veterans who are expected to stand back and put up with this crap. Society has produced this type of behavior; society allows this type of behavior. When did we stop acting like Americans? When did we as a country become so frail that we need safe spaces to go to when our feelings are hurt? Good example, basic training recruits are given these cards that they carry around in their pockets. When, at any time, they feel stressed out by the drill instructor, they produce these cards from their pocket and display it to the DI. The DI then backs off.YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING!!!! It’s the military moron.You’re going to be stressed. This is just an example. We have become willing to keep our opinions to ourselves to avoid being labeled. By keeping our opinions to ourselves, it allows people to use the first amendment as an easy explanation for acting like a moron. How did we go from “I regret that I have but one life to give for my country “, to this? This is not what I and millions of other vets sacrificed our time and sometimes our lives for. How do we fix this? Sure I’ll give you my thoughts. We take a good look at ourselves. Are we contributing to this stupidity? Are we turning our backs on the problems as long as they don’t bother us in our complacent little lives? There are those who are on the front lines, facing these issues and doing what can be done. There are also those who look the other way when the fight gets a bit too close. What caused such a divided society? I have my theories on that. Maybe another rant for another time. It’s time to be Americans. Bring back the pledge of allegiance, Wave the flag high. Get on your feet during the national anthem. And whatever you do, DO NOT trample on or burn my flag. To be Americans, we have to act like Americans. Gary Emery, aka Wildman firefighter200463@hotmail.com

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Cindy Letterly 2012 950 VStar Tourer Davenport Marcella Peck 2002 HD Fatboy Atlantic, Iowa

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Sara Stanoff 2012 HD TriGlide Atalissa 22 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

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This month we wanted to chat about the American erican Legion, The American Legion Riders, and about bout the Newton American Legion Post 111 and their American Legion Riders. The American n Legion was chartered and incorporated by Congress in 1919 as a patriotic veterans organization devoted to mutual helpfulness. It is the nation’s largest wartime Veteran’s service organization, committed to mentoring youth and sponsorship of wholesome programs in our communities, advocating patriotism and honor, promoting strong national security, and continued devotion to our fellow service members and Veterans. Hundreds of local American Legion programs and activities strengthen the nation one community at a time. The Operation Comfort Warriors program supports recovering wounded warriors and their families, providing them with “comfort items” and the kind of support that makes a hospital feel a little bit more like home. The Legion also raises millions of dollars in donations at the local, state and national levels to help veterans and their families during times of need and to provide college scholarship opportunities. The American Legion is a nonpartisan, not-for-forprofit organization with great political influence ence perpetuated by its grass-roots involvement in the legislation process from local districts to Capitol Hill. Legionnaires’ sense of obligation to community, state and nation drives an honest advocacy for veterans in Washington. The Legion stands behind the issues most important to the nation’s Veteran’s community, backed by resolutions passed by volunteer leadership.

growth is through a branch of the Legion called the American Amer Legion Riders. The Newton American Legion Le Post 111 is one of the many Legion posts p to start up ALR chapters, and the results have h been impressive. The Newton Legion Riders and other Legion Riders groups are not a motorcycle club, but rather members of that Legion that ride motorcycles. Post 111 ALR is made up u of Monroe and Newton American Legion members m and their main purpose is to honor and support Veterans. This particular chapter has been be organized for going on four years and has about 60 members, and would welcome more! Each Legion Rider Post is different, and has differing levels of activity, but this one is quite active. In the past four short years, they help out the American Legion Post as needed, they have given five scholarships to young students in the past three years, they have participated in Memorial Day ceremonies, and they hosted their very first poker run in July of 2016, and it was a great success. They are present at Thunder Nights in Newton at their bike night, as well as at other surrounding area bike nights. They have also escorted the Wall that Heals on two separate occasions. No matter what the weather, the ALR Post 111 will do flag lines for deceased Veterans in their area. They wish to do this for support and honor of a decea deceased Veteran and their family, and it is their privilege priv to do so.

The American Legion’s success depends entirely on active membership, participation and volunteerism. The organization belongs to the people it serves and the communities in which it thrives. One way for Legions posts to stay active in the community and spark 26 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

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The T Newton American Legion Post 111 houses the Patriot Bar, which is open to the public. The club is open MondayThursday 4:00 pm-9:00 pm, FridaySaturday 4:00 pm-2:00 am, and Sunday is Closed. There are a variety of activities including DJ and Karaoke, Food Specials or food nights on various nights by the Sons oof American Legion and Legion Riders, and daily drink specials. You can contact them at newtonamericanlegion111@ gmail.com or look them up online at www. newtonamericanlegion111. org or find them on Facebook at American Legion Newton Post 111. Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook


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Here it comes again the month of November! Not my favorite month on the calendar because it is usually brings along with it the end of the riding season. Seldom do Iowa bikers get much riding time in November and that sucks! However this year, November comes with some positives. If we survive the first 8 days I am positive there will be no political ads in our mailboxes, no more slanderous TV commercials and no more political debates! I am positive that I am not alone when I say I can not wait for this circus to finally end.

are ripped out so they will never drive again!” “I will support the 2nd amendment and defend your right to bear arms and legs, lots and lots of legs, long legs, short legs, lean legs, tan legs, tattooed legs, but not hairy legs I don’t like hairy legs but I really do love legs, in fact I love everything about woman from their breasts down to the their legs.” “I will make sure that no one is taken advantage of when buying riding gear, no more of this imported crap from China. You will get what you deserve when I’m in office, I will put an end to those cheap imported assless chaps once and for all, because when I strap on my chaps there will be an ass in them!”

I forced myself to sit down and watch the last 3 political debates. After all nothing screams lets have a good time like being lied to over and over again on national television. I also figured it sounded “We must work together to put an end to this stereotype that the great people of this state are referred to as Idiots Out Wandering like a great reason to consume massive amounts of alcohol. Aimlessly that’s IOWA for you slow readers.” As I watched the circus unfold, I couldn’t help but let my slightly “I will make it mandatory, if you are hosting a motorcycle fun run intoxicated sick mind wander how much more entertaining these in this state you will be required to provide each and every rider debates would be if the candidates were Iowa bikers. In my with a damn road map!” warped brain it goes something like this. “I promise to improve the roads in Iowa and create new jobs by harvesting and selling the ditch weed that grows wildly in this state. I will legalize marijuana and use the money to improve Iowa roads; we will have pot heads instead of pot holes!”

Be sure to thank a Veteran on November 11th if it wasn’t for them we may not have a right to vote. Shifty LaRue

“I will make sure that all employers improve their Family Medical Leave, so that each and every time an Iowa biker boosts the economy by buying a new motorcycle; they will get 12 weeks paid time off for riding because I know your bike is your baby!” “I will take care of the Veterans of Iowa; each one of them will have the same health insurance coverage that I do, I will ensure that they are added to my health insurance policy as dependants because I depend upon them to keep me safe!” “I also believe in equal pay so when I take office I will take care of our Veterans, we don’t have any money to pay them but I will make sure that each Veteran gets an unlimited line of credit like mine and they don’t need to worry about ever paying it off because that’s how we roll in the United States of America!” “I will keep us safe from our enemies by building a wall to keep any biker that supports the Nebraska Cornhuskers from crossing our borders and anyone wearing those colors will be deported!” “I will ensure that bikers get a longer riding season by giving all bikers a 7 week break from their jobs every summer so there will be more riding time, longer rallies, bigger hangovers and even more sunburns, after all Congress doesn’t work so why should you!” “I will alter the amount of taxes you are forced to pay by making sure that motorcycles and parts are deductible for everyone. Then I will add a special tax deduction for custom paint and loud pipes!” “I will enforce stronger penalties for people that are guilty of texting while driving when they run down a biker in Iowa. And I have no problem with capital punishment, for the drivers who claim I didn’t see that motorcycle; I will ensure that their eyeballs

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Nothing quite compares to the feeling of flying down the road on two wheels. The sun warms your skin and the wind tousles your hair. For some women, they dismount their iron steed at this point, gently shake their head, and walk away looking like a Hollywood starlet….well not me. This is where my nightmare begins. It seems that no matter what I do to tie back, or otherwise corral my hair, when the ride is over I’m left looking like my day job is a NASA wind tunnel tester. Now maybe this has something to do with my hair type – naturally curly and long is a great combination…if you spend your time in a climate controlled bubble. Personal hair struggles aside; I am constantly looking for a way to avoid the traumatic post –ride detangling session. After 40 years I am pleased to say that I have finally found a solution.

Wind Therapy

sure to reduce the time you spend on your hair after riding.

Now we all know that your hair isn’t the only thing that suffers when you are riding. Leslie has an answer for your skin and lips as well. Wind Therapy makes an anti-aging lotion that when applied, helps to keep moisture in and dirt out. It contains what Leslie calls a “superfood banquet” for your skin that will definitely have you logging in the miles. In addition to the moisturizer, Wind Therapy has a lip balm that will put the twenty different tubes you have lying around to shame. This lip conditioner can be applied under lip gloss and lipstick as well. This is my favorite lip balm, and I’m sure it will become yours as well. All of the Wind Therapy products are available for purchase on the website www.windtherapy.rocks. Or email leslie@windtherapy.rocks with any questions you may have. These products are a must have for women riders everywhere, and would make great gifts for your riding friends as well! Check out Wind Therapy products, you won’t be disappointed! Melanie J Schwarte Melanie@thunderroadsiowa.com

As you know, here at TRMI we are all about supporting small, family owned businesses. Well, just north of us in Duluth, Minnesota is a company created by a fellow rider that aims to put an end to all of my (and your) post- ride drama. Wind Therapy skin and hair care was developed by owner Leslie Cook, and is the answer to my “riding hair” prayers. Leslie has created what she calls “Shielding Detangler”. Wind Therapy Detangler is designed to do three things; it reduces static, protects and strengthens hair strands, and provides extra “slip” without weighing down hair. These three things together dramatically reduce tangles incurred while riding. This miracle detangler can be used in three ways 1) as a regular “conditioner” applied after shampooing and rinsed out 2) as a leave-in conditioner and 3) on the go, after riding mix with a few drops of water and rub through hair. Any way you use it, you are Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook

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TRMI NOVEMBER 2016 - 31


Part I- The Great Brand Wars-

to buy in 1981. The newer bikes really don’t leak unless there is a problem somewhere, which would be the case why we all just need to stop it and all stick together with any brand of motorcycle. Except if you build your own I ride an American V-Twin. I can’t call it a Harley because bike. If you build your own motorcycle using Harley parts, only the engine came from Milwaukee, but that’s what it will leak. Ask me. I think they use some kind of voodoo makes it go. In fact, my last four bikes all came from the sealant at the factory that prevents this, and it’s not sold great state of Wisconsin. A large number of the readers and to the public. If it ever comes out, please grab me a tube. I advertisers of this publication also ride American bikes. I know the bottom of my chopper will never rust out, because respect that and will ask you to keep an open mind about it’s always got a fine film of Primary Fluid on it. this topic as we proceed into this month’s column and next month’s follow up. #4 Harleys are 100% American made partsThere are a number of preset ideas we have about America’s favorite motorcycle. I’m as guilty of some of these as the rest of you. Let’s review some of them together to see how many might actually be true or false#1 Harleys are slow-

Ray Price (1937-2015) was the first person to ever hit 200 mph in the quarter mile on a motorcycle. That bike and many he rode since then were all Harleys. Ray started his drag racing career on a 1966 Sportster and before his death won multiple race victories, records and championships in AMA Drag Bike, the All Harley Drag Racing Association (AHDRA) and the International Hot Rod Association. Statistics like that don’t happen on a slow bike. It’s important to remember that a Harley makes power a lot differently than an import bike. I had the difference between torque and horsepower explained to me like this once- Torque is how much work a motor will do, Horsepower is how quickly it gets it done. A Harley makes mountains of torque. A top fuel drag Harley doesn’t sound that fast in the traditional sense, but at the end of the run, the sign at the end of the drag strip says something like “6.35 seconds and 234 mph”- that’s not slow in anybody’s book despite the fact that the bike sounded like a horny lawn mower going down the track.

Except the carbs on all the Evo’s, the entire fork tube, damper spring and fork leg assembly. And a bunch of the electronics. All that stuff came on the boat. It’s still one of the most American bikes out there to be sure. But you just about can’t buy anything that 100% USA any more, and those are just the cold hard facts of a global economy and supply chain.

And speaking of American made, we’ve now got Indian motorcycles. Again, and looks like to stay. I was involved in an ill-fated attempt to bring the Indian back in 1994. It didn’t work. Some guy from New Mexico bought the rights to bring it back, and he sold a bunch of distributorships to people across the country. In order to satisfy the US patent office (he said), he had to produce a running prototype engine not made from any other motorcycle engine parts. In July of 1994, he unveiled 3 of these engines at the New Mexico State Fairgrounds to a packed house of would-be dealers. If the motor ran, they each owed another $10,000 to stay on board with the Indian revival. What happened next? I guess we’d each have to write the definition of a running motor on a piece of paper and put it in a bowl and pull one out. It wouldn’t start for a while. That was the good part of the presentation. Then it fired. So to speak- it shot an orange ball of fire across the stage. Then it started, but ran like the spark plug wires were reversed. Then it gushed. Oil first, #2 Sportsters are chick’s bikesand then gas. The little podium it sat on had fluid running off every side. I heard a guy in the crowd say “I’m going See #1 above- Ray Price started on a Sportster and set world to be sick”. I went there to see if I wanted to be a dealer, records on it. When the Sporty was introduced, it was seen and hadn’t put any money down yet. I left with the same as a young guy’s bike. The heavyweight Harley bikes at the status. I actually snuck out the back door. That attempt, time were marketed to older riders and professional uses and another one in the early 2000’s didn’t fly, although the like the police and military. People that build motors to go second attempt resulted in running, drivable bikes. The fast will tell you that the Sportster motor has better valve latest iteration has resulted in some very nice looking and geometry for a go-fast motor. The Buell was a hybrid of popular bikes. I hope they do well, because the Indian name a Harley and a sport bike. They used the Sporty motor in is a proud part of the nation’s heritage, and our motorcycle those for the very same reason, because it’s a great motor history. that likes performance mods. If you happen to be a chick that rides a Sporty, more power to you. But if you’re a guy, So next month, we’re going to talk about the other bikes there is no shame in riding one, at all. Anyone that knows we share the roads with. The dual-sports, the sport bikes the entire history of the brand will defend you. with their alphabet-soup model designations, and the metric cruisers. We’re going to talk about it, because we need to #3 Harleys leakdevelop an atmosphere of mutual respect with one another. You’ve got more in common with those bikes and riders When American Machine and Foundry (AMF) took over than you realize, and we all have the same goal- to have Harley and saved it from going away forever, there were as much enjoyment on a bike as possible, and to get home undeniable quality problems. Some bikes lost virtually all alive. So until next month, take care. I’ve got some oil to get of their oil on the showroom floor because the cases fitted off the bottom of my bike. so poorly with one another. So what- they saved the brand from extinction. If they hadn’t kept it alive, there would Mark Mullins, President, MAG have been nothing for Vaugh Beals and Willie G. Davidson 32 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

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From: 1964 The Book of Motorcycles, Trail bikes, & Scooters

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Adrianos Brick Oven 18 N Walnut Street Glenwood, Iowa 712-520-9108 Adrianos Brick Oven on Facebook

staff, which all seemed to know too well where Adriano’s Brick Oven is located. It has become one of our favorite pizza joints in the state, and it has taken about 6 trips back to be able to get information and photos for a review. Actually, we had plenty of information after the first visit, but then and the subsequent visits we battled with the problem of forgetting to take photos until after we had devoured our pizza, and simply had to go back for another round.

I am a fan of a thin crust pizza, and the high heat from a brick oven offers some of the best most complex flavors possible for a pie. The insulating factors of the bricks hold in the heat, as well as radiate the heat back toward the cooking surface to cook a pizza in a few minutes, and that Mon-Wed 11am-8pm, imparts flavors that are not possible in Thu-Sat 11am-9pm, traditional ovens. The crust is thin under the toppings, with a slight raised crust Sun 11am-2pm edge. The overall crust is fluffy, yet due to moisture baking off remains soft and In Southwestern Iowa, in the burg of chewy. You may even be lucky enough Glenwood, just off of I-29 and Highway to get some slight caramelization of the 34, a must stop for some awesome pizza crust that adds even better flavor. On top is Adriano’s Brick Oven. It is located of the tremendous crust comes a great on the east side of the town square right about in the middle of the block across from the courthouse. variety of toppings that can be ordered in a regular menu pizza or a build your own creation type. They also have This Mills county gem is a mom and pop style of joint that caters to the needs of the customer, and cranks out some of weekly specials on pizzas with some out of this world types of combinations that are actually quite interesting. We usuthe best brick oven pizza around. On top of some aweally go with beef, sausage, onions, and mushrooms as that some pizza, they also offer salads, baked ravioli, and other is a favorite, but there are more choices than you can shake seasonal specials that are prepared and served on par with a stick at! Of all of the options there that we have tried, all the pizza. Our first of many trips here was when we were of them are of the highest quality and the freshest ingreon site at an event at Loess Hills Harley-Davidson. We were doing our deal getting some people signed up for Tall dients possible, and it certainly comes out in the finished product. The brick oven cooks the toppings more evenly Corn Run cards, and we kept smelling this awesome pizza and seeing and quickly as well, and with the freshest toppings to start, the quality comes through by magnifying the flavors with stacks the high temperature oven. The vegetable toppings when of boxes cooked quicker are cooked thoroughly, but remain crisper, coming and without being cooked for longer times maintain more of through the vital nutrients, so in essence, healthier pizza! Gotta love the door. that about a brick oven pizza! We were too busy regrettably So if you end up in Glenwood area, stop in and say hey to Adrian and have a great pizza! You won’t be disappointed! to grab a slice, Sitting in for Big Little this month, Vernon and Melanie so we Schwarte. inquired where it came from Until next month, ride safe and eat hearty! and we got craig@thunderroadsiowa.com directions PS If you have a place you think we should check out in your neck of the woods, shoot me an email. from the LHHD 34 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

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The 10th grade teacher asks Jessica: “What part of the human body increases to 10 times its normal size when excited?” Jessica responds: “That’s disgusting! I don’t have to answer that question!” So the teacher asks little Johnny, who responds: “That’s easy...the pupil of the eye.” “That’s correct, Johnny. Very good!” And turning to Jessica, she says: “I’ve three things to say to you, young lady... first, you didn’t do your homework; second, you have a dirty mind; and third, you’re in for a big disappointment!”

the fence, an elderly farmer drovee uup p on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, ed, “I shot a duck and it fell in this field, eld ld,, and now I’m going to retrieve it.” The old farmer Peter replied, “This is is my property, and you are not coming min ng over here.” The indignant lawyer sa said said, id d, “I am one of the best trial lawyerss in Iowa and, if you don’t let me get th tthat hat a ############################################### duck, I’ll sue you and take everything hhiingg you own.” The old farmer smiled an aand nd Jim and Lena were driving around the countryside when said, “Apparently, you don’t know w they ran over a skunk. “We better take the skunk to the how we settle disputes in Iowa. vet, Lena. Just put the skunk between your legs to keep it We settle small disagreements warm.” “But, Jim, what about the smell?” “Don’t worry, like this with the ‘Three Kick Lena. The skunk will get used to it.” Rule.’ The lawyer asked, “What is the ‘Three Kick Rule’?” The ############################################### Farmer replied, “Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I gget eett A young man and his date were parked on a back road some to go first. I kick you three times an and nd distance from town. They were about to have sex when the then you kick me three times and sso o girl stopped. “I really should have mentioned this earlier, on back and forth until someone give gives gi ive vess but I’m actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex.” The up.” The lawyer quickly thoughtt ab the aabout out th ou he man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After a proposed contest and decided thatt hee ccould ould ou ld ld cigarette, the man just sat in the driver’s seat looking out the easily take the old codger. He agreed abide reeed d tto o aab biid de by b tthe he he window. “Why aren’t we going anywhere?” asked the girl. local custom. The old farmer slowly wly y cclimbed limb bed ed ddown own ow wn “Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I’m actually from the tractor and walked up to th the His he at aattorney. tto tornney y. H i is a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25…” first kick planted the toe of his heavy avyy st av ssteel-toed tee eell-to toed toed work boot into the lawyer’s groin an andd drop ddropped dr rrop oppe op ppe ped ############################################### him to his knees! His second kick midriff k to the he mi midr iddrif drrif iffff sent the lawyer’s last meal gushing from his mouth. Q: How do you circumcise a whale? The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer’s third A: With four skin-divers. kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie. Summoning every bit of his will and remaining strength the ############################################### lawyer very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, “Okay, you old fart. A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to Now it’s my turn.” The old farmer smiled and said, “Nah, I celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man give up. You can have the duck.” leans forward and says softly to his wife, “Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always bothered me ############################################### that our tenth child never quite looked like the rest of our children. Now I want to assure you that these 75 years While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a have been the most wonderful experience I could have ever honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and hoped for, and your answer cannot take that all that away. angrily says, “No honey for you for one month!” Later that But, I must know, did he have a different father?” The wife afternoon, Johnny’s dad catches him tearing the wings off drops her head, unable to look her husband in the eye, she a butterfly. “That’s it! No butter for you for one month!” paused for a moment and then confessed. “Yes. Yes he did.” says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny’s mother cooks The old man is very shaken, the reality of what his wife dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps was admitting hit him harder than he had expected. With and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny a tear in his eye he asks “Who? Who was he? Who was and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his the father?” Again the old woman drops her head, saying father and says, “Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you nothing at first as she tried to muster the courage to tell the want me to?” truth to her husband. Then, finally, she says, “You.” ############################################### ############################################### Bill Clinton and his driver were cruising along a country What’s the difference between a condom and a coffin? road one evening when a pig ran in front of the car. The You come in one and you go in the other! driver tried to avoid it but couldn’t. The pig was killed. The President told his driver to go up to the farmhouse and ############################################### explain to the owners what happened. About an hour later the driver staggers back to the car with his clothes in total A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Northern Iowa. disarray. He was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, a He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field cigar in the other and smiling happily. “What happened?” on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over asked the President. “Well,” the driver replied “the Farmer 36 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

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gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar, and their beautiful daughter made mad passionate love to me.” “My God, what did you tell them?” asked the President. The driver replied: “I’m Bill Clinton’s driver, and I just killed the pig.” #########################################

starts crying uncontrollably. The genie asks, “My dear, what’s the matter?” The blonde whimpers, “I wish my friends were still here.” ############################################

A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.” Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger, “What would you like to discuss?” “Oh, I don’t know,” said the stranger. “How about nuclear power?” “OK,” said Little Johnny. “That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first.” “A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?” “Jeez,” said the stranger. “I have no idea.” “Well, then,” said Little Johnny, “How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don’t know shit?” ############################################### Three guys sit in a bar complaining about their wives. The first guy says, “My wife is so dumb, she carries an automatic garage door opener in her car and she doesn’t have a garage door.” The second guy says, “My wife is so dumb, she listens to an iPod and she doesn’t have any earphones.” The third guy says, “My wife is so dumb, she carries a purse full of condoms and she doesn’t even have a dick.”

One day a man, who had been stranded on a desert island for over ten years sees an unusual speck on the horizon. “It’s certainly not a ship”, he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft. Suddenly, emerging from the surf, comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She approaches the stunned guy and says: “Tell me, how long has it been since you’ve had a cigarette?” “Ten years,” replies the stunned man. With that she reaches over and unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says: “Man, oh man! Is that good!” “And how long has it been since you’ve had a sip of bourbon?” she asks him. Trembling the castaway replies: “Ten years.” She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve, pulls out a flask and hands it to him. He opens the flask, takes a long swig and says: “WOW, that’s absolutely fantastic!” At this point she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man seductively, and asks: “And how long has it been since you’ve had some real fun?” With tears in his eyes, the guy falls to his knees and sobs: “Oh good Lord! Don’t tell me you’ve got a laptop?”

############################################### Fast way to screw up someone’s Knock Knock joke...? “ It’s open.”

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island. One day, the three of them are walking along the beach and discover a magic lamp. They rub and rub, and sure enough, out pops a genie. The genie says, “Since I can only grant three wishes, you may each have one.” The brunette says, “I’ve been stuck here for years. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I just want to go home.” POOF! The brunette gets her wish and she is returned to her family. Then, the red head says, “I’ve been stuck here for years as well. I miss my family, my husband, and my life. I wish I could go home too.” POOF! The redhead gets her wish and she is returned to her family. The blonde Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook

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Every once in a while we come across a new part or accessory that is totally different, totally unlike anything else on the market, and something that is totally cool in its own way. This particular product comes from right here in the USA. The company is Rekluse at 12000 W. Franklin Road in Boise, ID 83709 and can be reached at: rekluse. com or (866) 7355873. These folks make clutches for the motorcycle and power sports world. The company was founded in 2002 and has been working at perfecting performance clutch technology ever since. Rekluse started out with products for the power sports market, and expanded into the Harley-Davidson world based upon need for their unique technology. They produce both manual and centrifugal clutches that are manufactured right here in the good ol’ U S of A! These folks want to make sure they make a superior product, and offer leading customer service, and they do just that. They believe in their work so much, that they offer a 30 day money back guarantee, without any BS, no questions, just contact them if you are not happy with the product. Their torqdrive manual clutches are the gnat’s backside for higher horsepower bikes, and the EXP 3.0 Centrifugal clutch is a perfect addition for riders that spend any time in stop and go traffic. I had the opportunity to install one of their EXP 3.0 Centrifugal clutches and run some miles. The installation is quite simple actually, just like replacing a stock clutch pack. No modifications to existing parts are needed, so a stock clutch can go right back in the bike if you want to keep the EXP 3.0 for a new ride when you trade. They work with both cable and hydraulic clutch motorcycles, and shifting still stays the same. Riders will still use the clutch lever normally for initially placing the motorcycle into gear, as well as up and down shifting. Where the operation of this clutch differs, is when coming to a stop light, sign, or in heavy traffic. When in 1st gear, as it is a centrifugal clutch, you can come to a stop with the bike at idle, and release the clutch lever. Yes, you can let off the lever with the bike in gear. The bike will not stall, will not die, will not go into convulsions, it will just sit and idle. When it is time to go, the centrifugal clutch kicks in when you roll on the throttle, and away you go! This feature was a bit hard to understand until I actually rode the bike. Coming up to a stop light, in 1st gear, I sat at the light with the clutch lever released, idling, without having to put the bike in neutral, and without any hand fatigue from holding in the clutch

38 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

at numerous stop lights. The EXP 3.0 Clutch is way cool, and sort of one of those “use it when you need it” type of accessories in the way of functionality. It is very nice in stop and go traffic, at stop lights, at busy three or four way stop sign locations, as well as the fact that it would be an arm saver in any parades and at rallies where it can take hours to slowly crawl to where you want to park. Some additional benefits of the EXP 3.0 clutch are that if makes low speed maneuvering a breeze. Off and on the throttle is what engages and disengages this clutch with no need to pull the clutch lever. The clutch pack itself also offers higher torque capacity and faster power to the rear wheel, as well as a cooler operating temperature. Cooler temperatures for the clutch pack also equate to longer clutch life. If you have a fellow rider that likes to continuously blip their throttle at stop lights or signs, this would make a wonderful Christmas gift for them! It would not take more than once to realize that would not work with this clutch. The only slight downside to this clutch is the lack of the transmission lockup while parking on a slope with the bike in gear. It will still roll, so the rider needs to find a flat place to park, or use the supplied strap to compress the front brake lever. It is a minor inconvenience outweighed by the function of a great American product. If you ride in any stop and go type of traffic or scenarios, go to any rallies, or get a sore arm from operating or holding your clutch, it is definitely worth a try. With Rekluse’ 30 Money Back Guarantee for an American made product, it is worth a shot. The EXP 3.0 Clutch will fit about any Twin Cam Harley, and many other models. It can be purchased for $799.00 and includes everything you need to upgrade your clutch. You can check it out more at rekluse.com TRMI Approved! Vernon

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Nov 11-12 Nov 13 Nov 18 Nov 20 Nov 25 Nov 25 Nov 25 Dec 10 Dec 10 Dec 17

ABATE of Iowa STEAM Marshalltown NORDEAST Swap Meet Minneapolis, MN Carroll Cycle Center Ladies Night Out Carroll American Legion 663 Stuff the Bus Toy Drive Urbandale Carroll Cycle Center Mens Night Out Carroll Black Friday Metro Cedar Rapids Turkey Run Clinton Santa Visits Metro Cedar Rapids Santa Visits Carroll Cycle Center Holiday Open House Big Barn Des Moines

2017 Jan 7 Jan 29 Jan 29 Feb 2-5

Retro Rewind Dubuque Wild Wade’s High Performance Swap Meet Des Moines Parts Girl Promotions Swap Meet Rock Island IL International Motorcycle Show Minneapolis

40 - TRMI NOVEMBER 2016

Feb 10-12 Feb 17-19 Feb 24-25

International Motorcycle Show Chicago 31st Annual Lincoln Bike Show Lincoln, NE Omaha Chapter AMCA National Swap Meet Fremont NE Feb 25-26 48th O’Reilly Rod & Custom Bike/Car Show Monticello Mar 3-5 World of Wheels Chicago Mar 5 Parts Girl Promotions Swap Meet Cedar Rapids Mar 17-19 TRMI Motorcycle Show at World of Wheels Omaha Mar 25-26 30th Annual Donnie Smith Bike Show St Paul, MN May 7 11th Annual Blessing of the Bikes Blue Grass Jun 29-Jul 1 ABATE of Iowa Freedom Rally Algona Aug 3-5 Across the Border Raid Bedford Aug 26 Jami Jam VI: Ride For Mental Health Action & Awareness Terril Sep 9 No Nipple Dipple for Hunt of a Lifetime Buffalo

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Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook

Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa November 2016  

Iowa's Biker Magazine. About Iowa, For Iowa, From Iowa

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