March always seems to be a pivotal month for the riding community for a variety of reasons. It is THE transition month between the dreaded winter season that keeps most of the riders off of the roads, and the spring time when bikes start coming back out. It is getting warmer, but still need to watch out for snow, ice, rain, sleet, and hail, and tons of garbage on the roadways. It warms up during the days but just like late fall, by sundown, you sure as hell better be close to your destination because it will get cool quickly when the horizon gets dark. At least by March we have some additional daylight as the days are getting markedly longer. We can double down on that thought with the start of Daylight Savings Time as well, so we will start to have some more time to get home before the vampires come out. I hate changing the clock, as the older I get the more it messes with me for a longer period of time each year, but I do like having more daylight at the end of the day, so I guess it is a wash. Also in March is the “official” first day of spring. It is not like I have ever waited on the calendar to see a certain day to get back out on two wheels, but it is like I said, a transitional time.
Fairgrounds with car, motorcycle, and cool stuff. It has always been in January, but it was moved to March for better weather, less chance of blizzard, and a lot better access. Well worth checking out in the middle of March. On the 16th, 17th, and 18th in Omaha, Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa is hosting the Midwest Motorcycle Show. This is held in conjunction with the Omaha World of Wheels and this year will be even bigger and better. We have cash prizes and trophies to hand out, and will be a great time. If you want to show off your bike, there is still time to enter, but don’t delay. Look on pages 20-21 for more information and for an entry form, or you can email Vernon@ thunderroadsiowa.com and I can email or mail you one.
Also in March we have some holidays and noteworthy days. St. Patrick’s Day is shaking out on a Saturday this year, so make sure to avoid foundering on corned beef, and don’t over indulge on the green beer. I have heard that combination can almost be deadly the day after the holiday. Also in March is Palm Sunday and Good Friday this year. One that I did not want to forget to mention is March 2nd and the observance of Employee Appreciation Day. We are With the March month of transitioning out of winter and greatly appreciative of our awesome, loyal, and committed some possible riding, also comes a ton of other events going staffers here at TRMI. We love them dearly and could not on in the biker world. Most of these I have been to with publish every month without them. They are the ones that temperatures in the 60’s, sunshine and wonderful, but also are also out and about, gone the extra mile, and have been at 10 degrees, snowing, with blustery winds. I guess that as passionate about this magazine as us. We thank them is part of the beauty of March, and Ma Nature letting us from the bottom of our hearts, and we ask you to shake their know she is still in charge. March 4th in Cedar Rapids we hands and thank them as well when you see them out and will be at the Parts Girl Swap Meet. I sure am hoping for about. good travel weather that weekend, as I always look forward to seeing friends and biker family on that side of the state Watch out for the other guy… that weekend. Joe puts on one heck of a parts swap meet Vernon and gets a ton of stuff crammed into this one day event. If anyone is looking for “that one last thing” or working on Quote of the month: “It was one of those March days a build, this is the place to go. March 11th in Des Moines when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is the Wild Wade’s Swap Meet. This critter is also a one is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.” Charles day only affair, but it packs the largest building at the State Dickens
On the Cover Mark Fountain of Fountain Photography got some great shots of Kam Sukhon’s 2017 Heritage Softail for our cover. Kam’s bike is one of many that will be up for cash prizes and trophies at the 2018 Midwest Motorcycle Show March 1618th at the Century Link Center in Omaha. The bike show is held in conjunction with the World of Wheels and is always a great time! Mark with have a booth at the show, as well as a camera not far from his eye to get some more great shots of the show. Stop on by the TRMI booth, ogle some of the bad as can be rides of all ages, and just have a great time on the weekend of St. Patrick’s Day in March. 4 - TRMI MARCH 2018
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The time has come; I have a confession to make. We have a trailer. And yes, we use it. Not just one but several, okay, in fact many. Many meaning several more than several. We have trailers for the bikes to go on and in, singles and doubles, open and enclosed trailers to pull behind the bikes, big popups and little popups. I know, some of you are saying “What kind of biker would trailer or at least even admit to using a trailer unless you were broke down along the side of the road? An intervention may be needed.” The fact is that the ride to Sturgis isn’t as fun anymore as just riding once we get there. There is always the excuse that we still get 600 to 800 miles riding in once we are there and because of changing accommodation situations we now have to stay in what we pull out there after unloading the bikes. It does seem to beat the heck out of a tent in a field. Getting caught in the wind, rain, snow and hail is part of life when riding - we’ve done it many times over the years - but experiencing it to get there doesn’t hold the same sense of adventure it once did. (I forgot to mention tornado, like the one that flattened our CMA camp temporarily at the Freedom Rally.) In looking at our need to use trailers I could always put the blame on Karla. Besides being the convenient scapegoat, she takes so many different pairs of boots and jackets and mystery bags that we need the space, whether it is behind the bikes or the truck. But I have to admit I started coming to the realization last year while getting ready to leave for Algona that maybe I am partially to blame. Karla was not going that time, just me, and I was forcing the lid down on the biggest size, behind-the-bike Aluma trailer they make. Then wondering, how much stuff, canopies, chairs, etc.… could I ratchet-strap to the lid and still see what was behind me in the mirrors. Seems as if when the mirrors aren’t adjusted correctly you can’t see what you need to see, only the pile of junk you are hauling. The direction they are pointed determines what they will reflect. That got me thinking of all the adjustments we have to make as life goes on, what kind of junk we are hauling and also where are we pointed. We age, we do different things at different times or seasons of life, some things by choice; others by forced necessities, but in it all, where are we pointed and what are we reflecting?
like him as we are changed into his glorious image. And 1 Corinthians tells us, for now we see through a glass (a mirror) darkly, but then face to face with perfect clarity. All I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know completely as God knows me completely. His word, His promises. I hope at the end of the road when family, friends and acquaintances look back in the mirror of my life, they will be able to say, “He had to make a lot of adjustments but he reflected Jesus well.” Of course then they will probably ask…. What did he ever do with that trailer? Blessings, Mark Mark and Karla Cornick are Area Reps with the Christian Motorcyclists Association. Find out more about CMA and God’s plan for you at www.cmausa.org
The Bible tells us that we are to become like Christ and be conformed to His image. Simple statement but not so simply walked out. Is our life truly reflecting Jesus or just religion? Is it busy-work, hurts, offenses, misplaced ideals, hypocrisy, some pile of baggage we are hauling around or truly the characteristics of Christ? 2 Corinthians says that all of us who have had that veil removed can see, like looking into a mirror and reflect the glory of the Lord. The Lord makes us more and more 6 - TRMI MARCH 2018
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American Made:
Still Exists in Shop Equipment HMC Industries is synonymous with Quality American Made shop equipment. Service shops and consumers depend on quality equipment from HMC to stay on top of repairs and avoid costly delays when untested or inferior equipment fails. Manufactured in Marshalltown, Iowa, HMC’s brands of Hollingsworth, Hy-Pro©, & HMC are fabricated, welded, and assembled with American labor and g centers. advanced tech machines like their Okuma turning hen HMC Industries began when Hollingsworth Mfg (since 1918) ventured out to create their own line of service equipment including gas caddies, lift nd tables, welding tables, hand pumps, and various hand tools. Today›s bikes are an investment and savvy h the consumers know it›s worth small additional cost to usee en they equipment from HMC when heir bikes want to service or detail their bikes. The SL2482 motorcycle lift is the perfect lift for consumers who like to change their own oil, detail their bikes, or add customization to their ride. HMC›s SL3090 offers a wider and longer table with the option of adding
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their unique Quad Design side extensions; which allow for one person to install or remove each individually. All of HMC›s SL series lifts utilize the same frame, cylinder, bearings, & non marking phenolic wheels. Having common parts under the table means less parts for the dealer to stock and consistent lift height and closed height. New products releasing this Spring include ZEUS; the first modular dual cylinder lift for large UTV›s and vehicles like Slingshot©, a new Oil Drain Caddy which has a side Slingsho extending extendin arm to reach under motorcycles and UTV›s while on the lift, li and a new Veteran themed lift which HMC will donate a percentage of sales to Veteran causes. If you are ar looking to update your service equipment, add to your ccurrent service capacity or perhaps purchase a lift for personal use, be sure to check out the quality American Made equipment line from HMC Industries. Www.hmcindistries.com 844-957-1502
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The Biker Friendly Business Directory is a list of establishments throughout Iowa that sponsor the magazine. You can pick up your copy here every month. Let them know that you saw them in TRMI. If your business would like to advertise in Thunder Roads Iowa Biker Friendly Business Listing and become a part of the network, please email vernon@thunderroadsiowa.com
Biker Accessories CoolBikerStuff.com 1606 P Avenue Milford, Iowa 51351 877-816-2200 Follow us on Facebook!! Crispy’s Biker Apparel Cedar Rapids, Iowa Find Us On Facebook 319-241-0916 HMC Industries, Inc. 702 S. 3rd Ave. Marshalltown, IA 50158 Toll Free: 844-957-1502 hmcindustries.com
Churches Rebels In His Hands 600 16th Avenue Council Bluffs, Iowa Mark and Lora Schiller Pastors 712-329-9901
Dealers
Fenders Cycle and Motorsport 1500 E Army Post Road Des Moines, Iowa 50315 515-256-9062 www.fenderscycle.com Fenders Honda 919 E Lincoln Way Ames, Iowa 50010 info@fendershonda.com 515-233-4727 Loess Hills Harley-Davidson 57408 190th Street Pacific Junction IA 51561 712-622-4000 loesshillshd.com MCA Midwest Cycle Authority 4200 E 14th Street DSM 515-266-2100 On Facebook Metro Harley-Davidson 2415 Westdale Drive SW Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52404 319-362-9496 www.metro-motorsports.com Nishna Valley Cycle HONDA – YAMAHA – KTM Atlantic, Iowa 50022 1-888-577-6406 www.nishnavalleycycle.com Route 65 Harley-Davidson 1300 S Jefferson Way Indianola, Iowa 50125 515.962.2160 www.route65hd.net Route69Customs.com 2814 SE 14th St, DSM 515-288-9600 Custom American V-twins Follow us on Facebook
Baxter Cycle 311 4th Street Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2351 www.baxtercycle.com
Storm Lake Honda 3040 Expansion Blvd Storm Lake, Iowa 50588 StormLakeHonda.com 712-732-2460
Big Barn Harley-Davidson 81 NW 49th Place Des Moines, Iowa 50313 515-265-4444 www.bigbarnhd.net
Struthers Bros Kaw-Suz-Tri 5191 NW 2nd Avenue Des Moines, Iowa 50313 515-282-3634 www.struthersbros.com
C&C Custom Cycle 130 E Lincoln Chariton, Iowa 50049 641-774-7494 www.cc-cycle.com
Uptown Motors Sales, Inc 310 Cleveland St Muscatine, IA 52761 563-263-2944 www.uptownmotorsales.com
Carroll Cycle Center 1327 Plaza Dr Carroll, Iowa 712-792-1610 www.carrollcycle.com
Wiebler’s Harley-Davidson 5320 Corporate Park Drive Davenport, IA 52807 563-355-6437 www.wieblers.com
Edwards Motorsports and RV’s 1010 34th Avenue Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712-366-8400
Zylstra Harley-Davidson 1930 E 13th Street Ames, Iowa 50010 515-232-6223 zylstrahd.com
fullthrottleia.com or edwardsrvs.com
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Entertainment Book Em Dano’s 33 S Main Street Denison, Iowa 51442 712-263-9818Mon-Sat 4-2 Dancers Nightly 5-1:30 Celebrations DJ & Karaoke Services Newton, IA 641-521-8036 Any Occasion /Rally or Event EmCee Facebook/Ray Johansen(Celebrations) Specializing in Weddings & Receptions Marshall County Hangmen DUO ACT AVAILABLE Bike Nights, Bars, Private Parties Large Events & Small Dave Gray 641-691-0822 National Motorcycle Museum 102 Chamber Drive Anamosa, Iowa 52205 319-462-3925 Nationalmcmuseum.org Okoboji Classic Cars Museum and Restoration Shop 810 Jeppeson Road West Okoboji, Iowa 51351 712-332-8029
Food and Drink (Popular Poker & Fun Run Locations) American Legion Post 46 1301 S 6th Street Marshalltown, Iowa50158 641-752-3612 Open to the Public 7 Days a Week American Legion Post 111 1101 W 4th Street S Newton 641-792-3353 Open to the Public 7 Days a Week Newtonamericanlegion111.org Barney’s 203 S Mill Street Wadena, Iowa 52169 563-774-2525 Barney’s Wadena on Facebook Baxa’s Sutliff Store & Tavern 5546 130th Street NE Lisbon 319-624-2204 Cold Beer, Delicious Food, Good Music & Great Times! Calvin Rockett Bar & Grill 2013 South Center Street Marshalltown, Iowa 50158 641-328-1033 Open 7 Days a Week 11 – Close Catfish Charlie’s On the Mississippi River 1630 E. 16th Street Dubuque, IA 52001 (563)582-8600 www.CatfishCharliesDubuque.com
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Desperados 105 E 5th Street Atlantic 712-243-7087 Home of Cold Beer, Good Times, Pizza & Wings Eddies Tavern 407 D Street Sergeant Bluff, Iowa 51054 Open 11am 7 Days/Week 712-943-9924 Ferg’s Bar & Grill 806 Hwy 30 Grand Junction, Iowa 50107 515-738-5416 Where Good Friends Meet Firehouse Bar 1211 5th Street Downtown Sioux City, IA 712-224-1020 Open Daily at 12:00 Flat Tire Lounge 304 S Madison Madrid 515-795-4174 Outdoor Patios – Happy Hour 3-9 Flat Tire Lounge on Facebook Fore Seasons Golf Bar 6232 HWY S-74 South Newton, Iowa 50208 641-792-1246 Open to the Public 7 Days a Week Greencastle Tavern – Mingo Outdoor Patio – Friendly Service Wed Bike Nights – Fri Steak Night Coldest Beer in Central Iowa Greencastle Tavern/Ryan Maher on FB Grinnell Eagles Club 616 4th Avenue Grinnell, Iowa 50112 Open 7 Days a Week Check Us on Facebook Grinnell Pub 909 State Street Grinnell, Iowa 50112 641-260-8003 Grinpub@aol.com Goozman’s Westside Bar & Grill 1019 7th St Harlan, Iowa 712-755-2259 Goozman’s Westside on Facebook Happenings Bar 508 W Market Street Steamboat Rock, Iowa www.happeningsbar.com 641-868-2000 Haverhill Social Club 202 1st Street Haverhill, Iowa 50120 641-475-3321 Mon-Sat 10-2, Sun 12-12 Hog Stop BBQ 2327 S. 24th Street Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712-EAT-BBQS Hog Stop BBQ on Facebook
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Iron Saddle Saloon 39 S Main Street Dayton, Iowa 50530 515-547-3311
Montgomery Street Pub 207 East Montgomery Street Creston, Iowa 50801 641-782-2165
Scooters on Broadway 475 NE Broadway Des Moines, Iowa 515-288-1053 scootersonbroadway@hotmail.com
The Edge 3157 Joliet Avenue Missouri Valley, Iowa 51555 712-642-2229 The Edge on Facebook
J.R. Willie’s Gateway to the Beautiful Hill Country Colesburg, IA 563-856-5095 Open Daily Mon-Sun 11AM Home of the Willie Whopper
Mudders in Minburn Coldest Beer in Dallas County Bar Food-Wings-Pizza-ETC 515-897-9223 Open M-Sun 11AM Facebook Mudders
Sidetracked 206 West Union Street Creston, Iowa 50801 641-782-8534
The Lounge 1005 Chatburn Ave Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-755-5050 The Lounge Harlan Iowa on Facebook
Just 1 More 515-570-4206 403 3rd Ave Under the Water Tower Jamaica, Iowa
Old Timer Tavern 401 S Center Street Marshalltown Mon-Sat 6am-2am, Sun 12pm-2am Outdoor Patio-Live Entertainment 641-753-9854 and Facebook
Sportsman Bar & Grill 103 1st Street Pisgah, Iowa 51564 712-456-2222 FOOD, FUEL, FUN
KC’s Tavern 120 N Main Street Bridgewater, Iowa 50837 Mon-Fri 4:30-Close, Sat-Sun 1-Close Find Us on FB 641-369-2017
Papa Joe’s 117 South 6th Street Missouri Valley, Iowa 51555 712-642-9015
Stumpy’s Bar & Grill 423 Main Street Duncombe, Iowa 50532 515-543-4222 Stumpy’s Bar & Grill on Facebook
Kippy’s Place 364 NW Main Street Elkhart, Iowa 50073 51-37-3104 Open at 11 Daily..find us on FB
Lampe’s Pub 608 Iowa Avenue Dunlap, Iowa 51529 712-643-5781 Open 7 days a week at 11 AM
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Suds –N- Jugs Bar & Grill 807 Iowa Avenue Onawa, Iowa 51040 712-433-4880 Nightly Food Specials
Pines Steakhouse Oinkers Lounge & Grill
Knickers Saloon 2186 Central Avenue Dubuque, Iowa 52001 563-557-0887 365 Days a Year Knickers Saloon on Facebook
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Pearl Street Social Club 110 Pearl Street SW Shellsburg, Iowa 52332 319-436-7100 Find Us On Facebook!
Lynn’s On Merle Hay 6014 NW 59th Ct Johnston, Iowa 50131 515-270-9806 Find us on Facebook! Mainstreet Bar 204 E. Main Street Terril, Iowa 51364 507-841-0978 Check Us Out on Facebook Main Street 519 S Main Street Council Bluffs, Iowa 51501 712-256-3613 Open 7 Days a Week
k McCanns Tap NE 14th & 54th Des Moines, Iowa 50313 Bike Parking M-F 2:00 Sat & Sun 11:00 Mi Casa Family Restaurant 512 Market Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-755-2258 Enjoy Drinks at the Full Bar! Midway Tavern 206 1st Street Soldier, Iowa 712-884-2230 www.midwaytavernsoldier.com
1500 E 7th Street Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-243-3606 M-F 11AM-, S-S 4PM-
Sugar’s Diner & Lounge 2725 E Kanesville Blvd Council Bluffs, Iowa 712-322-3600 Check us out on Facebook
Polk City Pub 217 W Broadway Polk City, Iowa 50226 515-984-9388 Open @ 11:00AM / Closed Mon. Red Oak Tap 419 E. Reed Red Oak, Iowa 51566 712-623-4788 Riverside Tavern 450 E Main St Lehigh, Iowa 50557 515-359-9998 Email:riversidetap@gmail.com RJ’s Bar & Grill 228 High Street – Kellogg Mon-Sat Lunch and Dinner 6 AM Breakfast Sat-Sun 641-526-9911 Roadhouse 105 Washington Marne, Iowa 51552 712-781-2272 Home of the Marne Burger Ruby’s Pub and Grill 114 NE 2nd Street Stuart NEWLY REMODELED Full Kitchen & Bar Check us out on Facebook Sambetti’s Bar and Grill 1430 2nd Avenue Des Moines, Iowa 50314 515-245-9780 Mon-Sat 11a-2a, Sun 11a-7p
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Sundown Bar and Grill 112 W State Street Williamsburg, Iowa 52361 319-668-2994 Patio Bar and Brick Oven Pizza T.J.’s Pourhouse 100 E. Washington Street Exira, Iowa 50076 712-268-2353 Open M-SAT.@11, SUN.@ NOON The Back Forty 317 Main St. Macedonia, Iowa 51549 712-486-2687 facebook.com/thebackforty The Buck Snort Restaurant & Sports Bar 25 Scott Street Council Bluffs, Iowa 51503 712-328-2825 TheBuckSnortrestaurantandsportsbaronFB The Buck Snort 419 Sharp Street Glenwood, Iowa 51534 712-520-6454 Buck Snort Glenwood on Facebook The Buck Snort 113 4th Street Neola, Iowa 51559 712-485-9090 The Buck Snort on Facebook
The Lucky Pig Pub & Grill 113 W Walnut Street Ogden, Iowa 50212 515-275-9946 The Lucky Pig Pub & Grill on FB The Place2B! 116 N. Federal Ave Mason City, IA 50401 M-F 3p-2a S-S 2p-2a Find Us On Facebook The Sawmill Bar & Grill Now with a Full Menu 401 Main St New Market, IA 51646-3079 712-585-3601 The Yankee Clipper 312 SW Maple St Ankeny, Ia 50023 515-964-9484 yankeeclipperbar.com Thirsty’s on 3rd 2202 W 3rd, Davenport 563-424-1143 Follow Us on Facebook Daily Thirst Quenching Deals Tobey Jacks Mineola Steak House Mineola, Iowa 712-526-2078 Open 7 Days a Week Check Us Out on Facebook Vic’s Main Tap 304 Broadway Audubon, Iowa 50025 712-563-2122 Opens M-F 3, Sat 10, Sun 3 Whatcha Smokin? BBQ+Brew 403 Iowa Avenue Luther, Iowa 50152 515-257-7490 Everyday 11am-9pm Whitetails Bar & Grill 101 N. Main St. Marble Rock IA,50653 641-397-9900 Mon- Sat 7am breakfast 2am Close www.whitetailsbarandgrill.com Wilson’s Tap and Recreation 1008 Story Street Boone, Iowa 50036/ 515-433-1395
The Buck Snort Oakland 310 Dr Van Zee Road Oakland, Iowa 51560 712-355-5315 The Buck Snort Oakland on FB
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Guns and Ammo
Butterfield’s M.C. Parts 8025 Blondo Street Omaha, NE 68134 402-391-3768
Walker, Billingsley & Bair 208 N. 2nd Ave. West Newton, Iowa 50208 Corey@WalkLaw.com 641-792-3595
2A Firearms Training Training to Protect Your 2nd Amendment Rights 641-439-6660 Craig.2aft@gmail.com
Lodging/Food
JLM Shooters Supply 6931 Doublas Avenue Urbandale, Iowa 50322 jlmgunshop@gmail.com 515-331-1577
Chuck’s Cycle Service and Repair S&S and Drag Specialties Dealer 714 East 7th Street Washington, Iowa52353 319-461-5278
Laid Back Manor 312 Parker Street Green Mountain, Iowa (870)484-2561 “A great little place to ride to!”
Creative Concepts Collision 422 Market Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712.755.2231
Magnum Gun Sales 26487 Mulberry Lane Underwood, Iowa 51576 712-566-8100 Just Off I-80, Exit 17 McCunn Specialty Firearms 74980 Richland Road Massena, Iowa 50853 www.mccunnsguns.com 712-779-GUNS Wendl’s Weapons 529 N East Street Carroll, Iowa 51401 712-775-2338 www.wendlsweapons.com
Insurance & Financial Farm Bureau Financial Services 208 Faith Ave Underwood, IA 51576 Shane.baker@fbfs.com 712-310-7475 or 402-379-3237 O’Malley Weatlh Mgmt. 5623 NW 86th Street Suite 400 Johnston, Iowa 50131 515-490-0930 State Farm Clark Ahrenholtz, Agent NMLS# 1679997 2114 12th Street Harlan, Iowa 712-755-5724 Clark.ahrenholtz.jb69@statefarm.com
Jewelry Bill’s Jewelry Shop 903 Main Street Grinnell, Iowa 50112 641-236-1008 Rings Checked FREE!
Legal Hupy and Abraham sc, pc Lawyers for Bikers 800.800.5678 Hupy.com TheBikerLawyers.com Leehey Olson Law, PC Riding & Defending Your Rights for Over 30 Years 877-209-9452
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Photo and Art Ullrich Photography PO Box 1842 Clinton, Iowa 52733 563-243-8715 www.natanic.com
Services
Cycle Clinic 2209 ML King Pkwy Des Moines, Iowa 50314 cycleclinicdm.com 515-288-6954 F & J Racing 701 N 3rd Ave Marshalltown, Iowa 50158 641-752-8651 www.fandjracing.com
Halo Motorsports Dyno Tuning/Trike Conversions/Service A+ Affordable 101 2nd Street Heat, Air, Refrigeration & Geo Thermal Grand Junction, Iowa 50107 22274 Old Lincoln Hwy 515-370-2568 Crescent, Iowa 51526 712-329-9901 Mean Machine Cycle Parts Elkhart, Iowa 50073 Action Towing Stereos, Bars, LED Lights, Air Ride Council Bluffs, Iowa Mon-Fri 9-6, Sat 9-12 712-325-8235 515-367-7336 Discount or FREE Motorcycle Towing Motorcycle Medic 3176 Highway 30 BCS Computers Woodbine, Iowa 51579 100 Industrial Road 712-647-2818 Guthrie Center, Iowa 50115 Open Tues-Sat Noon-6PM 641-747-3344 www.brubakercomputer.com Nelson Machine & Forge General Machining, Ornamental CJ Now Plumbing Iron, Weld/Fab Sewer & Water Specialists 70 Washington Street 309-786-2002 Marne, Iowa 51552 Serving the Quad Cities Area 712-781-2220 On Call 24-7 Southwest Iowa Sandblasting Mike Magers 65162 Oxford Rd Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-249-3995
Pike Run Services 320 Main Nichols, Iowa 52766 Shop 319-723-4244 Cell 319-330-4541 Road Rage BikeWorks 401 High Street Avoca, Iowa 51521 712-307-6111 Road Rage BikeWorks on Facebook SS Collision, Cycle Works & Graphics 2902 11th Ave SW Spencer, Iowa 51301 712-262-3959 www.sscollision.com Steffens Cycle Shop LLC 1311 E 7th Street Atlantic, Iowa 50022 712-243-3076 Mon-Fri 9-5, Sat 9-12 or Call The Vic Shop DeSoto, Iowa 515-339-4313 Facebook.com/TheVicShop VICTORY ONLY Weeks Manufacturing & Powdercoating 2235 400th Street Walnut, Iowa 51577 402-651-6977 weeksmanufacturing@gmail.com
Tires Sandbothe Firestone 1106 Main Street Griswold, Iowa 51535 712-778-2223 Sandbothe Firestone on Facebook
To buy ad space for your business or service in our directory, give us call at 712-249-5630 or email vernon@ thunderroadsiowa.com
Shops & Fabricators s Bent Wrench Cycles 911 7th Street Harlan, Iowa 51537 712-235-2453 Bent Wrench Cycles on Facebook Bigfuuts Paint & Repair Baxter, IA 515-577-6730 Custom Paint & Fabrication After Hours Service & Parts Stereos-Electrical-Repairs
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99 counties to tour on the bike, 99 counties to tour, take one down, drive on around, 6 counties to tour on the bike. A few years back, a summer riding goal was to ride through each one of the counties of Iowa, and what was found was a wealth of interest and beauty. Each month we will revisit each county as a featured article. We will tell you about new things to see, places to ride, and give you a little spark of curiosity for our state of Iowa.
Webster County We approached Webster County on the northwest corner on County Road C66. The terrain approaching this area was flat, and a ton of electric generating windmills could be seen in and around Webster County. As we dipped into a valley and crossed a scenic river crossing, we officially hit Webster County. We rolled over the cool bridge of the North Branch of Lizard Creek that reminded us of the varied terrain of Webster County from previous trips through the area. It is mainly lightly rolling hills, but there are some amazing views, roads, and sights when a person drops down into the river valleys that run diagonally through the county. Some parts are flat as a table, where you can see for many miles, and other parts are carved out of terrain over years of rivers, floods, glaciers, and all of Ma Nature’s best. We rolled up and out of that cool river valley and back up on the flat, and could see for miles again. The closest town ahead of us was Clare, with towering grain elevator bins and legs punching into the sky, which could be seen for miles on our approach. The smallest town population wise in the county, we worried that we may not find anything cool here, but we stopped by Antlers Pub and Grill, right next to the USPS building. It has a nice rustic and inviting look to the place, and was even more so when we walked in. Despite being busy with getting ready for the noon mealtime, Lori chatted with us for a few minutes and said this is a popular place for bikers in the summer. Log cabin type siding exterior, rustic wooden interior, with a bunch of trophy whitetail heads on the wall make the name make far more sense. Locals said the food and service cannot be beat, so we will for sure head back that way sometime in the near future. Other than A Antlers, there were a few other businesses, and a giant grain elevator. With all the flatland in Webster County, they probably have amazing a crop yields that
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need vast grain storage facilities, and this is evident across the countryside here. After Clare, we headed eastbound and the next stop was Badger. We had to take a short jaunt north on 169 then back east toward town. Another huge grain elevator could be seen for miles coming into Badger. There are 14 towns entirely in Webster County, and there are eleven of those with populations of 600 people or less. Most of these small rural Iowa towns consist of a grain elevator, maybe a fuel stop, a bar and grill, and a couple of other businesses. With Fort Dodge not far away, there are quite a few bedroom types of communities in Webster County. Even in the smallest towns though, there is always something of interest to check out. Badger has a nice Veterans Memorial downtown, and although too early for them to be open when we rolled though, a place called Knuckleheads. This bar and grill has a theme of “quite possibly the coolest bar in town� so the owners must also have a sense of humor. I saw the sign with the moniker for the old HD engine, but the sign has an old racecar picture, so we will have to go back, even if just to find out the reason for the name of the place! From Badger we went east and south to Vincent. Coming in to Vincent, you notice from miles away there is something strange in town. Another huge grain elevator! So far all of these small towns to the north of Fort Dodge have been almost bedroom types of communities with small town local pride in their own way but a lot of the businesses are geared around the agricultural Industry. The Vincent Bar and Grill is right on the main drag through town. This little mom-and-pop type place that you could stop and get some vittles. Most of the little towns only having small credit card or debit card only type of gas station from the local cooperative but at least you can buy some gas in those towns. We headed south out of Vincent on P71. Next on the
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list was Duncombe. If you are ever anywhere near Duncombe, Iowa, Stumpy’s is a must stop place. Just look for the huge elevator e and go a couple blocks south s and you w find it on the will corner. c We have featured f their vittles v before on the th WRTE pages, a it is still a and great g place for some s damn good food. f If Stumpy is around, chat him up for a bit, he is quite q the character, c and a I bet y will you le leave fu and full la laughing. T fun The r riding in W Webster C County is w when you d drop into th river the valleys a find and s some of the r roads that f follow the t terrain and t winding the r rivers. The n next part of o the trip was w in the s southeast c corner of t county the w were some o the fun of r roads are. We made our way to Lehigh and the Riverside Tavern. Kelly and her gals always make the Riverside an enjoyable stop when we are in the area. Friendly service, cold drinks, and good food, what more could you ask for? This popular spot has been a host to countless runs over the years, and will be for many years to come. It is located in the town of Lehigh, which used to be two towns, Lehigh and Slabtown. The Riverside Tavern sits in what used to be Slabtown, as the town is split by the river, the west was Lehigh, and the east was Slabtown. Now all 400 people reside in the town called Lehigh.
the old opera house there for years. This is on the south edge of the main drag, just north a bit from the world famous Dayton Rodeo. I have never been to this, but hear a lot about it. There are horses there, so I shy away from rodeos. Horses are evil from my experience. We headed back up north now, and had to take a loop through Dolliver Memorial State Park. Any time of year this place is cool, but especially when leaves are green or turning in the fall. The sheer rock faces and winding road through the park is a nice diversion when in the Fort Dodge area. We kept going up through Otho and had to stop at the local legend, Marty Pringle’s place. Race cars, hot rods, motorcycles, this cat has done it all. He is one hell of a great guy, but sadly we missed him on this trip. Have to stop by another time to say hey. Next stop was Fort Dodge, and it was time for some food. Our friend Gary Kiley works at Mineral City Mill and Grill, so we stopped by to grab some Italian Nachos. Pasta chips and marinara, who wouldn’t like something, like that? We roamed around the downtown area for a bit admiring some of the old architecture, looking through some of the shops, and just kicking around for a bit, and then had to swing by Amigos. The popular river side place is home to the biggest bike night in north central Iowa on Wednesdays during riding season. Stop by to say hey to Mark and his crew there if you get to FD. We started running shy on time and had to get back for home, so we zipped through Callender and then Gowrie. In Gowrie they have a nice park with a cool Veterans Memorial, band shelter, and shelter house. Hopping place for the afternoon seemed to be Marv’s Market Street Bar & Grill. If you cannot find it, as the name indicates, it is on Market Street. It appears that Market Street is the widest street in the whole of Webster County. We had a good time roaming around Webster County. Check it out, hopefully on two wheels here in a couple of months. Next up is Winnebago County. Sources available upon request. Vernon vernon@thunderroadsiowa.com
While we were that close, we had to swing down to Dayton and stop by the Iron Saddle Saloon. Matt and crew have been serving up food and drink in Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook
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Balance? You mean staying upright on two wheels?
B.A.L.A.N.C.E.
Let’s start out with a couple of caveats right out of the stable as they say, I am not about to provide any deep mystical insight between man (er, woman, er PERSON) and machine, the magical bond one forms with their bike, causing the bike to just “go” in the intended direction. If you have spent a great deal of saddle time you know of which I speak. Riding is second nature, you look a certain way, and the bike just goes that way. You don’t think, you just are one with the machine in a beautiful, mechanical harmony, near symphonic blending off your inner core controlling the bike and riding without giving how you are even doing. Perfect. Balance.
polish my yard, hose my gutters, count my shingles, arrange my tool box, shuffle my shoe closet, etc. etc. etc.
Ask yourself what is important to YOU and your life? If you love to ride, then dammit, stop making excuses and get out and ride. Don’t sit there and tell me you need to be in front of the TV just in case those guys find that treasure on the island. (They won’t! There is no treasure, we all need to stop getting sucked into that show, me included) IF riding is important, that is awesome, it’s one of the coolest things my wife and I do together, it’s a thing that ONLY her and I can do, as adults where we don’t feel guilty about the kids not being included. That is what the boat is for, or their sports, or whatever we do. But riding, that is ours. Look, I am not different than you are or anybody else. We all have stupid, weird demands on our time that if we continue to always accept, it becomes the norm. We become accustomed to just NOT riding and this is your casual reminder to say the hell with it, we are getting out and cracking a throttle. No, I am still not great at saying “no” but I am getting better. The spousal unit would say that I am not good enough just yet, but life is fleeting enough and I really care less and less if I hurt someone’s feelings by saying “pound sand” I have shit to do. It’s not of their business what that might be, but it’s time to do a little bit for yourself.
Nope, concerning that I really got nothing to give to you. Well, yes, I can tell you take a riding class, ABATE of Iowa has an amazing one; it might even give you a break on insurance, but likely not. I did take that class with my brother-in-law who I will call “Wingnut” because that is what I call him. He, like me, started riding about the same time we could find that balance of holding a dirt bike up. Both were lucky our dads were great parents and before we were both seven, motors were our world. We both took that class, while there wasn’t an “aha” moment, we both agreed it was helpful and pretty cool, plus we spent a day screwing around on bikes that are more fun to ride than shooting fish You never miss the memories you don’t create right? in a barrel. Well, when the season is over you will have a pile of near memories because you said the hell with it, it’s time to Again, not that kind of balance, however super important swing over a leg, maybe pack a bag and see what the road and way cool it is. ahead has to offer, even if it’s only a bike night in the town one county over. The riding life balance is the balance that challenges many of us. The balance of GETTING TO RIDE, finding the time A wise man once said in a phrase I am about to bastardize between doing what we NEED to do and what we WANT to and makeup, nobody ever sat on the couch at the end of the do. I know, it’s that devil and angel on the shoulder thing we riding season and said… all deal with in life. “I am sure glad I didn’t burn all that gas riding my bike this I wrote last December about making a promise to yourself, summer and having fun” sort of a “resolution” if you will about finding the time to get some more saddle time this year. Maybe it’s just taking Todd “Crash” Davis one night a week to hit a bike night somewhere and while you’re at it, think about hitting a different bike night. Ride to the other side of town, maybe there is a town a county over that has a cool bike night, just once, make it happen. Get out of your comfort zone to create new memories. Don’t forget one thing that I suggested, hit a poker run or three. Keep your eyes peeled; find a neat event that would be a fun day to attend. Maybe it’s a cause you care about, a route that looks neat, or you know somebody that might be going, get on a bike and do it. Find the balance of not letting another spring or summer slide by without you getting the saddle time you dream of. It’s SPRING DAMMIT and it’s time to put away the excuse we all seem to find when it comes from NOT doing the things we want to do. We always find time to explain away the joy of life you know. Oh, work came up, or I just can’t find the time, I need to clean the garage, paint the house, 26 - TRMI MARCH 2018
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The featured military rider this month has been a friend of the family, and a supporting advertiser in the magazine for years. Scott Petersen is the owner of Creative Concepts Collision in Harlan, Iowa, and is probably most widely known in this area as Skeeter. He is definitely no stranger to two wheels, but is also no outsider when it comes to the military. His grandfather was in the Army, and fought for the United States in World War II. His step dad, Terry Blum, also served in the National Guard, in the same unit out of Atlantic that Scott served with later on. Fresh out of high school Scott followed in his step-father and grandfather’s footsteps when he joined the Army National Guard in 1990. Scott served in the National Guard through 1999, attaining the rank of Sargent/ E-5 by the time it was all said and done. He started out with Basic Training at Fort Benning, Georgia, and then continued on in the same location with his Advanced Infantry Training. As this was the time of the first Gulf War and all of the troops were ramping up for going overseas. Scott was no exception to this and needed to complete Desert Warfare Training, which he completed at Death Valley. He was all ready to roll when the orders to stand down came through, and Scott continued to serve for quite a few more years. Scott may not have traveled quiet as far as his grandpa did during his years of service, but he did serve out of Atlantic, Iowa; Camp Ripley, Minnesota; and Camp Guernsey, Wyoming with a primary MOS of Infantry- 11 Bravo. Petersen first learned a love of two wheel travel on a 1974 Honda 250 Elsinore that was (and still is) owned by his dad. Back in the day, Elsinores were the gnat’s ass when it came to dirt bike racing, and the first 2 stroke engine and motorcycle ever built by Honda. Over the years Scott has owned many different bikes including a Yamaha FZR 600, Honda CBR 600 F2, and a score of Harley-Davidsons comprised of an 1989 Softail Custom, 2007 Deluxe, 2010 Deluxe, 2010 Street Glide, and his current ride of choice of course being his beautiful black 1968 FLH Shovelhead, because “it’s old school….and Shovelheads are cool”. TRMI agrees with you, Skeeter…. Shovelheads are indeed cool. Really cool, even if they can be a bit on the temperamental side sometimes. Though there was a short time he went without a bike, as he used his Harley as financial backing towards his auto body repair shop, as soon as the checkbook allowed, Scott was 28 - TRMI MARCH 2018
back out on two wheels tearing up pavement. The Shovel that Skeeter currently rides was purchased from a local motorcycle legend of sorts, Ron Ronfeldt… but Ron himself is a whole other story for a different time. The only thing he
knows for sure he would like to change on the ’68 is a different set of bars that may be a little more comfortable. Other than that, the slab side is good to go! Scott has numerous friends that love to ride just as much as he does, and when work and family allows for riding time, you will find Skeeter attending local poker runs and fundraisers around the state. This March Skeeter will have a booth showing off some of the fabulous paint work offered by Creative Concepts at the Omaha edition of World of Wheels in the Midwest Motorcycle Show. Be sure to stop by his booth and check out what Scott, master painter Joe Chance, and Creative Concepts can do for your ride…as well as shake Scott’s hand and thank him for his service. I know that those of us at TRMI thank you and all troops, past, present, and future for preserving our freedoms and protecting our country. Melanie J. Schwarte Melanie@thunderroadsiowa.com
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As you prepare to finger your 2018 calendar for the third time this year. I’m pretty excited to announce that March has finally arrived!!! For you slow readers that means the last and final month of winter celibacy!!! Seeing the letters M ARCH and knowing that I’m going to be getting some soon makes for a pretty big smile on my face. And just in case you haven’t checked for yourself, trust me, the Calendar Makers put spring on the agenda again this year! The long awaited coveted day will be here on March 20th I sincerely hope that the calendar makers made sure that Mother Nature is aware that she needs to get her ass to work. After all, the Iowa Bikers want longer days, warmer weather, lots of sunshine and dry roads. And if she is not capable of putting out, she can pack her bags and head on down the road with Old Man Winter.
group. I have been considering hosting a weekly support group meeting called the “Sanity Savers” for those of us that fell into that addiction through the winter. And since Bikers love chili, I figured I would offer it free as a gimmick to get other part shopping addicts to attend. Then I realized my guests could accidently mistake the stench from the rump rippers for something dead. And if they happen to notice the 200 tree shaped air fresheners dangling from my ceiling it could prompt an investigation. To hell with the support group, I just need to blow the stink off, it is time to ride!
Lastly, I need to cancel my subscription to the movie channel I can’t help it, the bike was parked in the living room and a couple weeks into this winter thing I got bored with just sitting on it! One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew I had run out of entertainment. That Knowing that the first day of spring is throttling its way movie channel was working out pretty good until I ran into Iowa I have been working on my “to do list”. First out of biker movies to watch. It was then that I discovered up on my list is to dispose of my favorite chili recipe. It’s while cooped up inside for more hours than I would like, kind of like Lent, I’ve decided to give up chili for riding. which incidentally made me very irritable, sometimes to I kind of miss my riding buddies and the cheek squeaks the point that that I would argue with myself in front of the after eating chili 7 days a week is somewhat breath taking. mirror for hours. Anyway, I discovered that I was fondly The last thing I need right now is a new nickname just attracted to serial killer movies, which has absolutely because I’m breaking wind and I’m sure as hell not going nothing to do with my fear of an investigation. to give any of them ugly SOB’s mouth to mouth because they can’t breathe. Hang on to your hats Iowa bikers, spring is roaring into this great state. Get yourself signed up for the TRMI Tall Next up, I have spent all winter trying to find an app for Corn Ride and prepare your machine for the open road. my smart phone that will accurately test the air pressure in Winter celibacy stinks but it is coming to a close, time to my tires. I thought it might also work to measure the psi celebrate the simple fact that we survived it without killing of the sphincter whistle in case that ever becomes a field anybody. event at biker gigs. Call me a quitter, but I’m giving up on that search. Let’s Ride! Then I better get serious about paying off the credit card bill. I have discovered that on line shopping for “must have parts” in the dead of winter for a cooped up biker that isn’t getting any, should come with its own addiction
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Shifty LaRue
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had gotten ourselves into and the waitress laughed for what I can only assume was the same reason. But you know what…I won’t complain, because those were some of the tastiest, crispest onion rings I have had the pleasure of consuming in my life. Thinly sliced onions in a light tempura like batter…onion ring perfection. We proceeded to eat far too many of those golden rings while waiting for our main courses…this would haunt us later when we both wanted to nap on the way home, but had no chauffer to get us back to K-town.
Majestic Hills Bar & Grill 2505 Boulder Drive Denison, Iowa 712-263-4404 Hours: Monday-Saturday Lunch: 11:00-1:30 Dinner: 5:00-9:00 While out and about running errands on a cold winter day, our stomachs starting protesting the way we had run out the door with only a to-go coffee earlier in the morning. Vernon told me to seek a little help from the all-knowing Inter-Web and see if there was anything to check out that we hadn’t already tried a hundred times before. What caught our eyes was a ingeniously placed photo of a plate of fresh, crisp onion rings….thus began our detour to the Denison golf course, and the Majestic Hills Bar & Grill.
For our main courses, I ordered the Saturday special, which happened to be a hot beef plate. It came out piled high with homemade pot roast on white bread and mashed potatoes that were definitely NOT from a box. The plate was as full as could be, and covered with a delicious brown gravy that tied it all together. This meal was definitely special, and not just on the menu board out front! Vernon chose to order the Majestic 57 for his main course. This sandwich is best described as a meatloaf sandwich on steroids…it is twice the size of an average burger, so big the bun is a toasted hoagie roll. The ground beef is hand-pattied and topped with pepper jack cheese and a few more of those delicious onion rings we started with. But wait, there’s more! The bburger also came with a hheaping pile of perfectly sseasoned French fries that were nice and crispy on w the outside and tender and th fluffy inside. As much as we wanted A to….neither one of us to ccould clean our plates. This is definitely a place T
We rolled through the door about 1:00, so I’m sure they were less than thrilled to see 2 newbies perusing the menu like we had never seen a burger before, but none the less, our waitress was very friendly and prompt. There is a full bar in the clubhouse, but we ordered iced tea and went back to looking for our lunch. In addition to the menu, they had a lunch special and also served prime rib on the weekends. Despite locating numerous appetizers that sounded delicious, we placed our order for a HALF plate of those glorious looking onion rings that had drawn us in to begin with, and also our main courses. We settled in to wait for our meals, and noticed a nice sized salad bar, as well as several piping hot carafes of soup available to restaurant patrons.
to go when you want to fill your belly. The w waitress kindly brought us a small suitcase to take our leftovers home in, and believe me when I tell you that we had an entire additional meal out of said leftovers. We will definitely be going back to Majestic Hills Bar & Grill, hopefully during a dinner service to try out the vast array of steak, chicken, or seafood options…plus that gets me a free pass to try out that soup and salad bar I mentioned before. If you are in the Denison area, take the extra minute to wind on over to Majestic Hills Bar & Grill…it’s just around the corner from the golf course and Boulder’s Inn and Suites, and it is a hidden gem in Denison that you won’t regret looking for!
Until next time…filling in for Big Little. A few short minutes later, our waitress emerged from the Melanie J Schwarte kitchen carrying the largest half order of onion rings I had ever Melanie@thunderroadsiowa.com seen in my life…Vernon and I gasped, wondering what we 32 - TRMI MARCH 2018
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Two Men were out fishing when one decides to have a smoke. He asks the other guy if he has a lighter He replies “Yes I do!” and hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter. Surprised the guy asks “Where did you get this?” The guy replies “Oh I have a personal genie.” The first man asks “Can I make a wish?” Sure says the other man “Just make sure that you speak peak clearly cause he is a little hard at hearing” ring” “Ok I will” says the other as he rubs the lamp a genie appears and asks the man what he wants The man says “I want a Million Bucks “The genie says OK and goes back to his bottle and 10 seconds later a million ducks fly overhead and the guy says to the other er “Your genie really sucks at hearing doesn’t he?” The other man replies “I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC” Q: Why didn’t the metro bus driver let G-Unit on the bus? A: Because they didn’t have 50 cent with them In a crowded city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman who was waiting for a bus was wearing a tight mini skirt. As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. Again, she tried to make the step only to discover she still couldn’t. So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step, and, once again, much to her dismay, she could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind a third time to unzip a little more and again was unable to make the step. About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus. She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and yelled, “How dare you touch my body! I don’t even know who you are!” The Texan smiled and drawled, “Well, ma’am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kind of figured we was friends!”
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A drunk dr blonde woman was sitting at a bar says to the barman, “Barfender, I’d like a marhini for my heartburn.” The barman mixes her drink and puts in down in front of her. A few minutes later, she calls him over and says, “Barfender, I’d like a marhini for my heartburn.” He rolls his eyes bu but mixes her drink anyway and sets it down in fron front of her. A few minutes later, she waves him over ag again and says, “Barfender, I’d like a marhini for m my heartburn.” The barman looks her up and dow down and says, “First off, it’s bartender, not barf barfender. Second off, its martini, not marhini. And third, you don’t have heartburn; your boob is in the ashtray.” An elephant ele asked a camel, “Why are your breasts on your back?” “Well,” says the camel, “I think that’s a strange question from somebody whose wiener is on his face. One day Jake is walking into town with a wagon load of duct tape. Farmer Jim says, “Where are you going with all that duct tape. “Jake says “I’m going to catch me some ducks” “You aint gonna catch no ducks with that there duct tape” says Farmer Jim but sure enough the next day Jake comes back with some ducks and a wagon load of chicken wire. “What are you going to do with all that chicken wire? Now don’t tell me....” says Farmer Jim. Jake says “ I’m gonna catch me some chickens” “You aint going to catch no chickens with that there chicken wire” says Farmer Jim but sure enough the next day Jake rolls into town with chickens and a wagon load of pussy willows Farmer Jim says “Is that a wagon load of pussy willows?” “Yup, the finest I could find” says Jake Father Jim says “Wait I’ll go get my coat” Police Officer: “How high are you?” Pothead: “No officer, it’s “Hi, How are you?” Freddy and Wilma are lying in bed with Pebbles and Pebbles looks down and sees Freddy’s penis and says “What’s that daddy” and Freddy says “That’s my rock” and then Pebbles thinks for a little while and then looks down again and sees Wilma’s vagina and says “mommy what’s that?” and Wilma says “That’s my rock grinder” Pebbles
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thinks for a while and then says “Oooo I get it, so daddy puts his rock in momma’s rock grinder and out comes Pebbles
AT&T Condoms: Reach out and touch someone. Campbell’s Condoms: Mmm, mmm, good. Nike Condoms: Just do it. Toyota Condoms: Oh, what a feeling! Who can ask for Q. Did you hear that Monica Lewinsky turned Republican? anything more? A. The democrats left a bad taste in her mouth. Diet Pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby. GE Condoms: We bring good things to life! Pringles Condoms: Once you pop, you can’t stop. This man went into Walmart and bought a rod n reel for 2 Mentos Condoms: The freshmaker. bucks. When he got to the cash register there was a blind Doublemint Condoms: Double your pleasure, double your man checking him out at the cash register. At about that fun! time he let out a fart. The blind man said that will be $3.50. Secret Condoms: Strong enough for a man, but pH balanced The man asked why and the blind guy said 2 for the reel 1 for a woman. for the duck call and .50 for the stink bait. Ford Condoms: The best never rest. Have you driven a Ford Lately? Chevy Condoms: Like a Rock. Sixteen years ago, a young woman, with a baby in her Jeep Condom: There’s Only One Jeep (sold in singles only) arms, entered his bakery and confronted the baker with the The Saturn Condom: A *Different* Kind of Condom news that the baby was his and asked what was he going Dial Condoms: Aren’t you glad you use it? Don’t you wish to do about it? Finally he offered to provide her with free everybody did? baked goods (bread) until the boy was 16. She agreed. He NY Lotto Condoms: ‘Cause, hey -- you never know. had been counting the years off on his calendar, and one Avis Condoms: Trying harder than ever. day the teenager, who had been collecting the bread each Energizer Condoms: Keeps going and going... week, came into the shop and said, “I’ll be 16 tomorrow.” KFC Condoms: Finger-Licking Good. “I know,” said the baker with a smile, “I’ve been counting Coca Cola Condoms: Always the Real Thing. too, tell your mother, when you take this loaf of bread Diet Coke Condom: Just for the taste of it home, that it is the last loaf of bread she’ll get, and watch Lays Condom: Betcha can’t have just one. the expression on her face.” When the boy arrived home MCI Condoms: For friends and family he told his mother. The woman nodded and said, “Son, go Taco Bell Condoms: Get some before you go south of the back to the baker and tell him I have also had free meat, free border. milk, and free health care for the last 16 years and watch the The Sears Latex Condom: One coat is good for the entire expression on his face!” winter. Starburst Condoms: Gets Your Juices Flowin’ Bud-Light Condom: Where’s the Love Man! Bob, a hunter, went on camping trip with his wife, kids, 7-UP Condom: The UN-Condom and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the Iomega Condom: For All Your Stuff forest, the Mrs. awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to Microsoft Condom: Wherever you want to go today. We are her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her universally compatible. mother. Bob picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight the mother-in-law was Paddy walked into a bar on St Patrick’s Day and started backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large ordering martini after martini. With each drink, he removed bear stood facing her. The wife cried, “What are we going the olives and put them in a jar. When the jar was filled to do?” “Nothing,” said the hunter husband. “The bear got with olives and he’d finished all the drinks, Paddy started to himself into this mess; let him get himself out of it.” leave. As he did so, a curious customer asked him, “Excuse me, but what was that all about? “Nothing really,” replied Paddy, “My wife just sent me out for a jar of olives.” Bill Clinton and his driver were cruising along a country road one night when all of a sudden they hit a pig, killing it instantly. Bill told his driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what had happened. About one hour later Bill sees his driver staggering back to the car with a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and his clothes all ripped and torn. “What happened to you?” asked Bill. “Well, the Farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar and his 19-year-old daughter made mad passionate love to me.” “My God, what did you tell them?” asks Clinton. The driver replies, “I’m Bill Clinton’s driver, and I just killed the pig.” Q: What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? A: Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant. Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook
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Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook
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Modifications
The last couple of months we have written about a couple of Iowa riders that are gearing up for a 3,400 miles transcontinental ride from September 8th through the 23rd this year. This distance is interesting enough, but then throw in the fact that the ride must be completed on vintage motorcycles makes it even more amazing. As TRMI is following this event that has two overnight stays in Iowa, we thought we would keep expanding the series of articles to include more information about the run. Here are the 2018 Motorcycle Cannonball Run motorcycle requirements that we got from the organizers. Motorcycle entries must have been manufactured in 1928 or earlier. Generally, any motorcycle manufactured in 1928 or earlier as originally manufactured and/or modified in its year of manufacture is eligible for entry.
*Fuel capacity may be increased. Auxiliary tank(s) may be added provided they meet Federal and State requirements, are properly vented, and do not detract from the appearance of the motorcycle. *All gasoline containers must meet applicable federal safety standards. *A FUEL RANGE OF 65 TO 100 MILES IS STRONGLY RECOMMENDED. We will recommend that vehicles with a range of between 65 and 90 miles carry additional fuel on certain Stages. Wheels and Tires
*Modern wheels are acceptable but must look period correct as much as possible *Riders may use beaded type tires instead of clincher tires *Motorcycles must be and appear original in nature, period *Electrical charging systems including generator/alternator correct modifications and customizations are ok; No modern and battery may be added. Modern Magnetos are allowed replica machines are allowed!! Engine Cases must be Brakes original *Period correct Transmissions only: No late model 4 speed *For safety brakes systems may be upgraded. transmissions *Period Correct carburetors: Linkert, Schebler,etc; No late *Conversion from a one-wheel brake system to a two-wheel brake system is permissible. model carbs allowed (S&S, Mikuni, etc) *Disk brakes are allowed. *Maintain speeds of 45 mph *Speedometer/Odometer: Each competing motorcycle may have one speedometer and one odometer. Required *Certain electronic devices permitted with written permission *All motorcycles must have the required equipment for *Absolutely no GPS mapping units!! lawful operation on public roads and highways in their State/Province/Country of registration. This is certainly not for the faint of heart. We wish Joe, *Current state or province registration and insurance Mike, and Lincoln along with their respective teams the best *An electrical head lamp, legally acceptable for riding at of luck and hope for a safe journey. night *One working tail light, one working stop (brake) light, and Vernon one red reflector on the rear of the motorcycle *Two rear-view mirrors, one on each side
Recommended Equipment *Orange “slow vehicle” triangle on the rear of the motorcycle, Operational fire extinguisher, dry chemical, at least 2½ pounds A/B/C, First aid kit, Emergency flares or reflectors, Container of drinking water, Flashlight, Tool kit,
Authorized 40 - TRMI MARCH 2018
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ABATE of Iowa District 2 2018 Winter Bash Winter. Don’t we all despise winter? Not being able to ride our bikes; walking past them in the garage. Hoping that Spring will be here soon and we can all ride! Missing the camaraderie of our fellow riders. Luckily, there are things to do in the winter to bring all your fellow riders together! District 2 throws the winter bash every year in January. It is a great night of food and fun! This year’s winter bash did not disappoint! It was a great night held at the Mile Away Hall and Tavern. We have held the bash there for about 20 years and we can’t thank them enough for the use of the hall, as it is the perfect site to hold the bash and their staff always takes great care of us. If you have never been to the Winter Bash it is a fun night! There is always a lot of food, a silent and live auction, a 50/50 drawing, door prizes and music. Donations are also taken at the door to be given to the local food bank and earn you tickets for the door prizes. Many months of planning go into making this night a success. District members go out and get donations from local participating businesses that are used at the silent and live auctions. Also a lot of donations are given by ABATE members themselves. There are always some very cool homemade signs and items that do well at the silent auction. It is always entertaining to see friends compete against each other for the highest bid on something they really want. There is something there for everyone! The food is potluck style and it is always fun to see what everyone brings. You won’t leave there hungry! It is a fun night to catch up with people you may not see much outside of riding. The winter bash is also a great place to join or renew that ABATE membership!
bring it on down and compete! On April 21st is the famous crooked stick pool tournament held at the Hardluck. This is always a really fun event! During the district meeting on May 20th, at the Hardluck, there will be a presentation on MC awareness. As we head into warmer weather there are also great events going on! There is the annual camp out at Cold Springs held on June 16 & 17th, with the district meeting being held there on the 17th. On August 24th through the 26th is the annual River to River ride! Please join us! We start the ride in Council Bluffs and will be heading to Marquette, Iowa. It is a great ride and northeast Iowa is beautiful! The annual toy run that starts at the Kmart parking lot will be on September 16th and the district swap meet will be held on September 22nd at the Hardluck. If you’re not a member of ABATE, come to a meeting! Ask other members what it is about! Get to know some of your fellow riders! Everyone is welcome! I can guarantee you will come away with many new friends! I have not been an ABATE member for long, and joined not knowing what it was really about. I have a new appreciation for motorcycles and our rights. I have made many, many new friends and have been to many ABATE sponsored events. Come to one of our events, bring some friends, have a good time and then join! I can guarantee you won’t be disappointed! Hope to see you there! Karolynn Sievers ABATE District 2 member
Luckily, the winter bash isn’t the only ABATE function to attend in these long winter months. District 2 hosts many other events to keep you busy while it is still too chilly to ride! On February 17th is the corn hole tournament held at Sugars Lounge in Council Bluffs. On February 18th is the district meeting and chili cook off held at the Hardluck also in Council Bluffs. If you think you make the best chili,
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Mar 4 Mar 9-11 Mar 10 Mar 11 Mar 16 Mar 16-18 Mar 17 Mar 23-24 Mar 24 Mar 24-25 Mar 25 Mar 31 Apr 6 Apr 7 Apr 7-8 Apr 14 Apr 14 Apr 21 Apr 21 Apr 28 Apr 28 May 3-5 May 4-5 May 5 May 5 May 5 May 11 May 12 May 12 May 12 May 12-13 May 19 May 19 May 19 May 24-27 May 27 Jun 2 Jun 2 Jun 8-10 Jun 9 Jun 9 Jun 9 Jun 9 Jun 9 Jun 15-16 Jun 16 Jun 16 Jun 23 Jul 5-7 Jul 6-8 Jul 7 Jul 13-14 Jul 21 Jul 21 Jul 28 Jul 27-28
Parts Girl Promotions Swap Meet Cedar Rapids Cycle Rama at World of Wheels Chicago B.A.C.A. of Central Iowa Flippy Cup Tournament WDM Wild Wade’s High Performance Swap Meet Des Moines “Accident Scene Management” The Golden Hour Spencer TRMI Motorcycle Show at World of Wheels Omaha ABATE D3 Spring Dance Atlantic Iowa Vintage Cycle Swap Meet Humboldt Spring Open House Fenders Cycle/Indian of Des Moines 31st Annual Donnie Smith Bike Show St Paul, MN CMA Knights For Christ Polar Bear Ride Cedar Rapids Summer Ride Kick-Off Event Big Barn HD Des Moines ABATE D15 Accident Scene Management Class Davenport Fashion Show Big Barn HD Des Moines 32nd Annual North Iowa Expo Mason City Blessing of the Bikes Route 69 Customs Des Moines Tom Simpson Birthday Run Anita Bike Blessing Route 65 HD Indianola Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Street Drags Conesville Bike Blessing Big Barn HD Des Moines Cancer Sucks Benefit Run for Cindy Ruth Mount Pleasant Rally in the Hills LHHD Pacific Junction Vintage Torque Fest Dubuque Sleeping Angels Fun Run Boone 2nd Annual Boji Run Icky Nickel Sioux City Rev It Up for Awareness Davenport Motorcycle Safety Forum Des Moines Heels on Wheels Women’s Ride Carroll HD 4th Annual Children’s Hospital & Medical Center Fun Run Council Bluffs Widows Sons Masonic Riders Association Charity Ride Des Moines 38th ABATE of Sioux Falls Motorcycle EXPO Sioux Falls Mean Machine “Spring Smoke-out” Elkhart B.A.C.A. Annual 100 Mile Ride ALL CHAPTERS Chrome for Kids Ride Benefiting the Boys and Girls Clubs of Cedar Rapids Redneck Revival Conesville Midway Tavern’s Annual Neal Denny Memorial Poker Run Soldier Harley-Davidson of Carroll Rock –N- Ride Carroll CVMA 39-4 Bike Wash Wieblers HD Davenport ABATE D3 Campout Littlefield Park Exira Bell Tower Festival Poker Run, Tour Rides, & Bike Show Jefferson F&J Racing 23rd Annual Blessing of the Bikes Marshalltown Open House & Pig Roast The Vic Shop Desoto Ride With Levi Keokuk 5th Annual Seu-Mo’s Memorial Ride Grinnell Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Street Drags Conesville Roar Into Harlan Cannonball Fundraiser Run Harlan Hometown Heroes Memorial Run Rockwell City Ride to Fight Suicide Colona, IL ABATE of Iowa Freedom Rally Algona Gears & Gasoline Rally Farley 11th Annual Freeman Ride Avoca CVMA 39-3 Annual Patriot Ride Elk Port 5th Annual “Ride for Time” with “Friends of Mine” Baxter Goozman’s Westside Annual Fun Run Harlan Volga City River Run Volga CVMA 39-1 Annual Patriot Ride and Rally Freedom Park Algona
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Jul 29 Aug 4
Low-Key MC Bikini Bike Wash Des Moines 39-4 CVMA SPC Jordan M. Byrd Tribute to Our Fallen Memorial Ride Davenport Aug 5 B.A.C.A. Kids Day Des Moines Aug 9 Hot August Night Car, Truck, Motorcycle, and Tractor Show Jefferson Aug 11 CVMA 39-2 Annual Patriot Ride Ride Cedar Rapids Aug 12 Klondike Car,Tractor,Truck & Motorcycle Show Manilla Aug 17-19 14th Annual BTW Trike In Kellogg Aug 25 3rd Annual Shayla Bee Black Tie Black Leather Affair Okoboji Classic Cars Aug 25 B.A.C.A. of Central Iowa Bike Bash Johnson Aug 30-Sep2 Redneck Revival Conesville Sep 1-3 Midway Tavern Soldier Valley Run, BBQ, Street Dance Soldier Sep 8 Broken Spokes MC Annual Children’s Hospital Ride Thirsty’s on Third Davenport Sep 8 Camp High Hopes Poker Run Fundraiser Sioux City Sep 14-16 Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Street Drags Conesville Sep 15 WTF Fun Run Harlan Oct 6 Iron Invasion Woodstock, IL Oct 20 Rumble In The Sand Outlaw Street Drags Conesville Oct 21 ABATE D3 Toy Run Atlantic Dec 16 ABATE D3 Christmas Party Brayton
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