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Obituaries James Wheeler C’69 – The Wheeler Family Paul Barrett C’73 – Patrick Bentham StB’73
James Wheeler C’69
3rd November 1950 – 7th May 2022
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Our father, James, tragically passed away at home from an unexpected heart attack on 7th May 2022 at the age of 71. His well-attended funeral was held at Worth Abbey on 8th June.
When we started to sort through his affairs and notify every one of his passing, we found it quite overwhelming to discover just how many friends he had. They ranged from people with whom he had been at school at Worth, through to his university degree at Westfield London, and then his long working life at Christie’s, Coopers & Lybrand, Hewitson Walker, Ashton Penney, PILOT Partners, EIM and latterly freelancing for Tyzack Partners. We were surprised to discover how many of his business colleagues, clients and people he’d helped into positions, went on to become real friends. Not quite so surprising was how many mentioned his love of a good lunch! Here are a few representative examples, which I’m sure will ring true for those who knew him:
“James was one of the last true English gentlemen, much respected for his kindness and interest in others”
“James was a lovely person and he had a kind heart – something perhaps not so common in the typical City of London environment, and which singled him out head and shoulders above the pack.”
“There are few people that could light up a room the way that James did with his wit, good nature and bonhomie.”
“James was a delight. Always full of ideas. And he was an enormous amount of fun” “James was a decent human being who looked out for others in need and lived a life treasuring and embracing the right values.”
But to us he was just Daddy, the self-titled Wonderful Human Being (WHB for short) and Grampy to his little bears. He had many and varied interests – Formula One, fine wine, medieval art and architecture, spending time in his beautiful gardens (directing operations rather than actually doing the gardening), but we decided that we would focus on one interest in particular here – his love of classical music.
While we were looking through his computer trying to find something unrelated, we stumbled upon a spreadsheet entitled ‘The JW 48’. Intrigued, we opened it of course, and discovered he had collated a league table of composers. The top line included the Premier League of composers – ‘The Top Dogs’ - which included JS Bach and Beethoven in joint first position. Then, he had listed various ‘lesser’ composers under categories such as ‘Division 1 – Never that Great’, ‘Division 2 – Slippery Slope’, and ‘Division 3 – Mostly French’(!) But the definitive league table according to JMHW didn’t end there. Worried as to what poor creative souls he had cast off into further divisions of shame, we read further. There followed a league of unfortunates who Daddy had decided were ‘Absolutely ineligible’ to compete in the Premier divisions. They were categorised under ‘Opera Mainliners, Wierdos, Modern Junkies and Veterans’. I’m afraid if you like Verdi, Scarlatti, Britten or Byrd, you may have found yourself ‘out of Daddy’s league’ so to speak! This is the father we will remember so fondly in our hearts - full of gentle but opinionated humour, able to make even an Excel spreadsheet amusing.
We are sure that he would have loved to have had the opportunity to share his interests with his grandchildren, as he did his children before them, but instead they will grow up with memories of fictitious ten-legged Norfolk spiders that came with him on his grandfatherly visits, and the knowledge that he wanted more than anything else “to live long enough for his grandchildren to take him for a pint of Harveys on their 18th birthdays”.
An incredibly generous, humorous, and spirited man, we know there will be friends from his school days at Worth who will mourn his loss too. But it is also a comfort to think that heaven has gained a true gent, and really there is nothing that could fill us – his family – with more pride.
The Wheeler Family
Paul Anthony Barrett C’73
19th June 1955 - 23rd June 2022
On 4th August 2022, family and friends gathered at GreenAcres Woodland Burial site near Norwich, to remember and celebrate the life of Paul Anthony Barrett, who died of metastatic cancer on 23rd June aged 67. His loss is mourned by his wife, Daniela, who nursed him through his last illness, his step-children Edward and Melissa, his two older sisters, Anne and Patricia, and a wide circle of family and friends from all around the globe.
Paul was remembered as a vivid character, a ‘cup half full’ person, imaginative, enterprising, eloquent, funny and passionate about many things, but above all, kind, gentle and helpful, especially to those less fortunate than himself. He sought out and shared the joy of life.
At school, Paul studied Greek, Latin, German, French and Russian alongside English. He loved language, describing the beauty of words as being like the feeling of juicy strawberries on the tongue. He made communication his career, working in public relations, writing and media, whilst travelling widely, visiting most European countries, the Far East, and the Antipodes, as well as living in England, Ireland, the United States and Canada.
Paul also discovered a passion for fencing at school. Sabre was his weapon of choice, reflecting his quick thinking and decisive personality. He proved a talented sabreur, earning a place in a school team that consistently won all its matches. He represented Britain in the International Catholic School Games in Vittel in 1973 and went on to become the Irish National Sabre Champion and trained with the Irish Olympic team.
Early in his career, Paul lived in Greenwich whilst working as a researcher for the House of Commons (at that time, he avoided the crush of regular commuting by canoeing up the Thames). That was followed by a long spell as editor of TV World, the trade magazine for the television industry. Eventually, tired of the internal wrangling of the TV industry, he, in partnership, set up an international public relations company which was a lucrative success.
Life changed for Paul in 1991 when he fell from a horse, suffering a traumatic brain injury that left him in a coma for weeks. His subsequent debility prevented him from continuing with his previous work, but with characteristic courage and enterprise, he decided to start afresh in the USA. He created a successful Showbiz News Distribution company in Los Angeles, with programming that was syndicated all around Europe and beyond. From LA he moved to Vancouver, where he started working to help victims of traumatic brain injury. His love of outdoor activity seemed to help his own recovery – walking, cycling, skiing and even learning to fly. Armed with his now considerable knowledge of brain injury related issues, he returned to England to study for a Master’s Degree and then a Doctorate in the rehabilitation of traumatic brain injury; having caught the study bug, he also gained a Master’s in English Literature. He worked voluntarily for organisations to help victims of traumatic brain injury, including becoming chairman of the Irish Brain Injury Association and also worked with individuals, improving their lives by helping them to understand their condition.
He used his experience of business communication to access various influential bodies, including a committee of the European Parliament, appealing for funding for rehabilitation after traumatic brain injury (TBI). He provided evidence that the debility following TBI was massively underestimated, because of inadequate research into the wide spectrum of symptoms suffered by individuals.
He wrote a book called Moving Ahead (available on Kindle), collating the diverse experiences of such victims, including himself, and highlighting the need for more thorough research into the many ways in which TBI changes the lives of its victims.
Ever enterprising, he also started consultancy work for European businesses entering the UK. Clients became friends and he found particular satisfaction in working with Hungarian friends and associates, launching a start-up business with animated educational videos. He collaborated with Imre and, most recently, Miklos, assisting Woodpecker Software Developer of Budapest to expand into the English market.
Paul loved the company of others, but was essentially a private person. He was dynamic, inventive, kind and generous spirited, helping a wealth of people and having many adventures that only he could recount. His was a life cut short, but well completed. In his last days he said to his family “I’ve had a fantastic life.” May he rest in peace.
Daniela Benison-Barrett
Air Vice Marshal Hugh Anthony Caillard CB, RAF WPS’40
16th April 1927 – 27th June 2022
Hugh had a rich, long and fulfilling life. He had the happiest of marriages of nearly 65 years. Throughout his long rewarding life the theme of Amor vincit omnia – love conquers all - gave him inward strength.
Hugh was born at the British Military Hospital in Wiesbaden, Germany. Because of his staunch upbringing and his personal faith, he said his prayers every morning and every night for his whole life. When he discovered, later in life, that he was born on exactly the same day, same year and same country as Pope Benedict, he was extremely satisfied or “gruntled” as he would say. But these two lives couldn’t be more contrasting.
Hugh grew up in a country still coming to terms with losing a generation of young men and an economic depression that impacted family fortunes. He and his brother Bernard were sent to Worth Priory School in 1934, both belonging to the first cohort of students. But in 1939 the School was evacuated to Downside where the children were meant to be safe from air raids. On the 15th May 1943, while attending a school cricket match, Hugh observed in horror a low flying sea hurricane lose control and crash into a crowd of onlooking pupils killing nine of them and injuring several others.
But this did not deter Hugh from joining the Royal Air Force in 1945. He was an exemplary pilot with ratings of between above average and exceptional. His nickname was ‘Split Pin’ because of his height and lanky disposition. He folded up in the shape of a paper clip into a cockpit.
Hugh’s first overseas postings were to Egypt, the Sudan and the Middle East – flying mosquitos, meteors and vampires. In early 1954 he was seconded to the Royal Australian Airforce where he trained and converted pilots onto Canberra jets.
In July 1958, he went on his atomic adventure – also known as Operation Grapple – at Christmas Island in the Pacific Ocean. Hugh flew as ‘Grandstand’ closely observing the first successful detonation of a 3 megaton H Bomb. But, his first-hand experience of weapons of mass destruction - “its awfulness”, as he later described it, shaped his feelings about the fragility of the world, God’s creation and the inadequacy of modern political leadership. During the early 1970s Hugh was given his last operational posting as the station commander of RAF Marham – which operated Victor Bombers converted into Air-to-Air refuellers. Although he enjoyed this work, he was already earmarked to fly a desk in Royal Air Force Intelligence. His four sons, Richard C’76, Andrew C’78, David R’79 and Johnny R’81, all attended Worth School.
During his life, his passion for steam trains and gadgets of all types unfolded with his extraordinary precision modelling. His penchant for time-keeping and accuracy also saw him become a marvelous clocksmith.
In semi-retirement Hugh headed up the Britain Australian Society, the Menzies Trust and joined the House of Commons Defence committee which kept him in contact with his spook and Air Force friends for another 10 years. During this time Walton-On-Thames became a centre of extended family life and stability for cousins and close friends (before moving to Australia in 1993).
After settling at Clareville (Sydney Northern Beaches), Hugh was invited to become a member of the Air Marshals Club which kept him abreast of developments in the Royal Australian Airforce and military affairs. This kept his mind active and his perspectives up-to-date well into his mid ‘80s. He also became the captain of his own ship – a 40foot sailing boat called ‘Top Cat’ – my mother’s nickname for him.
In 1948 King George VI said in a stirring speech to cadets at RAF Cranwell, at which Hugh was conspicuously present, “the pathway to the stars is hard and that hard path of duty lies ahead of you.” Well Dad, your journey in life – framed by duty, loyalty, purpose and peacekeeping – has been magnificent. You never gave up – even to the end. You are gone now – into the heavenly stars, and into our memories for ever more.
God Bless You.
Per Ardua ad Astra
