Charlotte's Web: The Literary Magazine of ICJA

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Char l ot t e's W eb t he Lit er ar y Magazine of Ida Cr own Jewish Academy

2019

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Let t er Fr om Th e Edit or s

Dear Reader ,

As you f lip t h r ou gh t h e pages of t h is book , you m ay n ot ice t h at t h er e is n o specif ic or gan izat ion . Th is is becau se ou r book w as cr eat ed w it h t h e t h em e of r ealit y vs. illu sion in m in d. Lik e t h e f low er on t h e cover , sh adow s bot h dist or t an d an im at e ou r r ealit y. So w e--t h e edit or s--ch allen ge you --t h e r eader s--t o f in d f or you r self as you r ead t h is book you r def in it ion of r ealit y an d illu sion .

Edit or s-in -Ch ief Tzippy David, Or iya Falk , Taliah Soleym an i, Abigail Br asch

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Dedicat ion Th ou gh w e w er e n ever pr ivileged t o m eet M r s. Ch ar lot t e Rosen w ald, a" h , it is in h er m em or y t h at w e dedicat e Ch ar lot t e's Web. We h ave h ear d abou t h er an d w e u n der st an d t h at sh e w as an ext r aor din ar y t each er ; sh e in spir ed h er st u den t s t o t h in k , w r it e, cr eat e, an d be pr ou d of t h eir accom plish m en t s. It is ou r h ope t h at t h e w or ds of t h is m agazin e w ill per pet u at e h er legacy, im par t in g t h at in spir at ion t o t h is n ew gen er at ion of st u den t s.

Th an k You t o Th e Su san an d Joseph Am en t En dow m en t Fu n d f or t h eir con t in u ed, gen er ou s su ppor t of t h is pr oject . Th is f ou n dat ion h as en abled t h e st u den t s of Ida Cr ow n Jew ish Academ y t o sh ow case t h eir best lit er ar y an d ar t ist ic ef f or t s in a pu blic f or u m . Th an k you t o t h e Am en t s f or en ablin g you n g w r it er s an d ar t ist s t o soar .

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St af f List Edit or s in Ch ief Tzippy David, Oriya Falk, Taliah Soleymani, Abigail Brasch

Advisor Mrs. Marsha Arons

Poet r y Sara Weiss, Tova Oliff

Pr ose Tamar Chavel, Shira Cohen

Layou t Max Miller

Ar t Molly Jacobson

St af f Daphna Czako, Shira David, Shoshana Bar-Meir, Adina Matten, Melinda Burgin, Rebeca Price

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Table of Con t en t s To Sleep or Not t o Sleep Rebecca Quintas........................8

Fif t een Sarah Rosenblum........................25

If You r Bedr oom Cou ld Talk Jacob Felix...................................9

Cr eole Michelle Babajoni..................26-27

At Th e Academ y Gym Lior Pinchot.........................10-11

Som et h in g bu t Not h in g Oriya Falk......................................28

A Pr ogr essin g Bir d Joseph Levine............................12

Pin k Flow y Dr ess Talie Mishie...................................29

M ou n t ain Goat Rachel Margolin........................13

Ju st On e Sh abbat Melinda Burgin.......................30-31

Th e M ean in g of An xiet y Bayla Alter.................................14

Obst acle Chavie Zeller.................................32

Th e Pow er of Posit ive Speech Kiki Robinson............................15

Wat er

I am Fou r t een Noa Brasch...............................16

Agin g

Gossip Shira Cohen..............................17

Fash ion is M y Revolu t ion Taliah Soleymani..........................33

A Sn ow y Day Tzippy David........................18-19

Her o

A Color f u l Seah or se Zoe Nussbaum.........................20

Salm on Nathan Shapiro............................35

A Piece of Clay Oriya Falk..................................21

Th e Well Daphna Czako........................36-37

How t o Fin ish a Race Shira David..........................22-23

How t o Over com e a Ch allen ge Meira Linzer..................................38

I Am Fr om Rachel Nueman........................24

Eigh t y-Th r ee Tzippy David..................................39

Sarah Shiner.................................32

Rebeca Price.................................32

Abigail Brasch...............................34

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Papa's Neck lace Sammy Moscovitch........................40

Fr ien d Fr om t h e Past Taliah Soleymani..........................63

Slow ly Bu t Su r ely Ayelet Dallal....................................41

Vict or y Wit h ou t a Win Tova Oliff.................................64-65

How Cu r ly Hair Ch an ged M y Lif e Molly Stein.................................42-43

An Ode t o Bam m a Ruby Grant..............................66-68

Reach in g For a M iss Joseph Levine..................................44

Sixt een Sarah Shiner.................................69

Paph y Sayw al Gadi Kalman....................................45

Gir l Oriya Falk................................70-71

How To Wat ch You r Sist er Fall in Love Alyssa Amrami...........................46-47

M y Af r opu f f Abigail Brasch...............................72

Th e M ean in g of Pain Taliah Soleymani.............................48

If

Tim e

Noah Pogonitz..............................73

Daphna Czako.................................49

Rem em ber in g t h e Fou r t h Boy on t h e Tr ain Plat f or m Sara Richter.............................74-76

Zeide's Teh illim Book Tova Oliff.........................................50 I Am a Beau t if u l Teen age Gir l Sara Weiss.......................................51

How t o Be a Good Older Sist er Dahlia Matanky............................77

At t h e Cor n er of 85t h an d Am st er dam Tova Kahan................................52-53

At Lak e M ich igan Rebeca Price...........................78-79

How t o Lobby You r Repr esen t at ive Rebeca Price..............................54-55

Dow n t h e Road Fr om Sh u l Nathan Shapiro......................80-81

Th e M ou se Get s t h e Ch eese Sarah Shiner....................................56

Du r in g Th at Win t er Batsheva Gubin......................82-83

Th e Flow er Simone Miller..................................57

Dear M y Lit t le Red I-Pod Nan o Tamar Chavel..........................84-85

Dau gh t er Bayla Alter........................................58

Or an gu t an Dafna Kutliroff..............................86

An Ode t o Sn ow Rebecca Quintas.............................59 M y Dad Tamar Chavel.............................60-61

Du r in g Th at Su m m er Josh Pogonitz................................87

How To Say Goodbye t o You r Br ot h er Pelah Cohen.................................62

You Ar e Abigail Brasch.........................88-91 7

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To Sleep or Not t o Sleep Rebecca Qu in t as To sleep or not to sleep that is the question.

Whether ?tis best to relax through the night So that the brain might work right In the morning.

Or to continue against our closing eyes And by pushing through it, finish it. To labor, to work.

Go through-and by work we say to examine the work That was completed after long hours of torture And not having to worry about the tasks in the future. ?Tis a completion That we all wish to achieve. To labor, to work.

To work, perchance to finish. Ay, there?s the rub, For in that work what tiredness may come When we have stayed up all the night Until comes the light. There?s the respect That makes the act of working still feel right. YetFor who would bear the stress and anxiety of time, The procrastinator ?s wrong, the closing eyes, The dark circles forming with every tired sigh.

When she works herself some much in one night The stress that comes on can make us feel not right.

There is no make up that can fully cover up the bags So we prefer to get into our bed And leave the all the textbooks and plays unread.

Despite the fact that the work will pile up more And you might fall asleep in class and let out a snore.

The work could end up not being done And the next night you could just end up working until the rising of the sun.

But I don?t care about my tired self or drooping eyes.

If I go to bed I will just wake up more stressed. So with a heavy sigh, I continue to sit at the table and do as much work as I am able (to do).

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If You r Bedr oom Cou ld Talk Jacob Felix Whenever you wake up from sleep,

?You still need us under your head!?

The furniture doesn?t make a peep.

Says the fluffy pillows on the bed.

But when you?re back to sleep some more,

?If your head feels heavy like lead, We?ll make it feel like a feather instead!?

Your furniture might talk to you and start a war.

Your furniture may fight all night, Your spinning fan might start the fight,

And fight so long dark turns to light!

Saying ?I will keep you cool all night!?

While each thing?s point may still be right,

Then says the bookshelf on the wall,

From this you can gain much insight.

?I have books for big and small!

If you want tales really tall,

Your fan might spin up a windstorm;

Come on over and read ?em all!?

Your shelf holds books of many a form.

?But I?m even better!? the toybox might say.

Your toy box may hold toys for play;

?I store lots of toys so that you can come and play!

Your lightbulbs light your room like day.

And when it?s time to put them away,

Your bedsheets give you a big hug;

I?ll keep them safe for the whole entire day!?

Your pillow keeps your head so snug!

?Your toys are no fun without our light!?

While the objects in your room simply want to be the best,

May say the lightbulbs, so very bright.

Each and every one of them is different from the rest.

?Well, we?re the best!? say the blanket and the sheet.

Now, we can see, with the fight truly done,

?They?re all so cold but we?re so sweet!?

That each and every one of them is truly number one!

?Whenever you lay down to sleep, We make sure to store your heat!?

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At t h e Academ y Gym Lior Pin ch ot Although it is nearing midnight Through the steel doors in the gym, A coach sits recruiting Her clipboard busting with papers Of scribbled over offenses and defenses.

Many x?s and o?s cutting towards and away from the basket The air smells of stained practice pinnies Reeking of sweat and body odor Fresh basketballs and new pairs of Nike sneakers The court painted with hundred of intersecting lines Restricting one?s feet from any impulsive steps Helping to trap any opponent coming one?s way All is blue: The hundreds of bleachers Sometimes feeling like thousands That get filled with candy bar wrappers and empty soda cans, But the blue of a defeated player ?s tears are the bluest of all Combining with sweat as it drips down to one?s chin Until it falls down onto the big number attached to one?s jersey After every fan has cleared out with only ten people left in the gym One coach and nine teammates stay Drawing up complicated new strategies with a single, blue expo marker.

Through the back steel doors Is a room with lockers lining the walls Where loud celebrations have occurred Along with moments of disappointing silence.

The young female coach constructs criticism She too has sat in my exact seat on the bench During a timeout with 10.72 seconds left of the game Team down by a single point.

Yet, that was many years ago.

Now all she is left with is a clipboard busting with papers and a blue expo marker

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Instructing the team to leave their hearts on the If you were to sit in seat 73D on the bleachers court

During a neck-and-neck game

Over by the admissions table

Every bone in your body would shake at each thump of the fans?feet

Which greets excited and anxious fans Selling concessions with a sign that states Buy three snacks, get one free drink Fans with red and blue face paint, jerseys, and socks filing in and out

And your heart would beat faster and faster as the time on the clock ticks down If you could taste it, the sweat dripping down the players, fans, and referees cheeks It would taste salty and unpleasant

One pair of Nike sneakers in particular

Yet there?s no taste in the world quite like it

Is seen day in and day out

Because when its not dripping onto your tongue you dream about that feeling

Eventually getting worn down and broken For now with the fresh smell of new shoes Helps to run quicker and jump higher

But when it?s there you wish it weren?t It is like what we imagine knowledge to be:

Put on right, put on left, tie left, then tie right

Natural, unappreciated, concise, hard working, sweat, taken for granted

The same order every game and practice

Constantly taking the lead and blowing it

An assortment of navy blue, university red, and the purest of whites

No appreciation when given and won

A translucent sole One difference is not seen by the crowd

Criticism when confiscated and lost A natural born talent or a continuous work in progress

Inside the sneakers states ?no excuses?

A simple two word phrase that has the power to push me harder and harder Day in and day out Behind me the scoreboard hangs Buzzing and beeping every so often A blue rectangle decides the fate of my night Whether it is victorious or not I have seen it over and over The same bleachers, the same scoreboard Differing in numbers every second The bouncy wood floor with a big ?A? emblem in the center The returning clipboard, year after year, season after season

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A Pr ogr essin g Bir d Joseph Levin e Th is yellow bellied, blu e f eat h er ed Baby Kin gf ish er , f allin g f r om t h e n est At t h e t ops of t h e lu sh r ain f or est t r ees,

Con st an t ly (f or lack Of t h e abilit y t o f ly) k eeps Ch ir pin g lou dly f or h elp.

It is as if h e is bein g lef t To f en d f or h im self in t h e Vast , u n pr edict able w or ld.

Alt h ou gh h e does n ot k n ow it , He w ill soon bu ild h is ow n n est An d w or k t o su r vive,

An d I, t oo, don?t k n ow Tow ar d w h at u n pr edict able lif e

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M ou n t ain Goat Rach el M ar golin

Th is w h it e an d br ow n m ou n t ain goat St an din g in t h e valley St ar in g u p at t h e t all, r ock y, m ou n t ain .

Lon g legs pacin g back an d f or t h In f r on t of t h e base Un su r e w h er e t o st ar t .

It ?s as if h e is look in g At som et h in g im possible.

Th e big m ou n t ain

Wit h t oo m an y bou lder s An d sh ar p edges Test s h is abilit ies.

An d I, t oo don't k n ow Wh en look in g u p at t h e m ou n t ain How t o solve t h e pr oblem , bu t Rock by r ock I clim b.

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Th e M ean in g of An xiet y Bayla Alt er Wh at is t h e m ean in g of an xiet y? Cer t ain ly ever ybody k n ow s w h at an xiet y is. Isn?t it ju st t h at f eelin g of n er vou sn ess bef or e a h u ge t est ?

Isn?t it t h at f eelin g you get on a f ir st dat e t h at goes aw ay in abou t f ive m in u t es?

No. An xiet y is t h e spor adic t h u n der st or m s t h at r u in t h e picn ic you ?ve been plan n in g f or w eek s. It is t h e su dden h eat t h at r u sh es t o you r ch eek s w h en all eyes ar e on you ; it is t h e h ollow f eelin g in you r ch est w h en he isn?t payin g you enough at t en t ion . An xiet y is t h e r ecu r r en t su spicion t h at you r f r ien ds don?t act u ally lik e you , t h at t h ey h an g ar ou n d you ou t of pit y. It is t h e su dden pan g of n au sea t h at you get w h en you st ep in t o a r oom f illed w it h st r an ger s, w h o su r ely m u st be ju dgin g you r h air , clot h es, m ak eu p, sh oes. It is t h e sin k in g f eelin g in you r gu t an d t h e lu m p t h at f or m s in you r t h r oat as you r eceive you r t h ir d f ailed assign m en t of t h e w eek . An xiet y is t h e ?u h , n ot quite w h at I w as look in g f or ? in r espon se t o you r an sw er t h at you w er e so con f iden t in . It is t h e u n w ar r an t ed f eelin g of isolat ion w h en you ar e su r r ou n ded by you r closest f r ien ds, you r people.

It is not t h e sof t ?love you ? at t h e en d of ever y ph on e call w it h you r best f r ien d. It is not f eelin g lik e you w ill over f low w it h su n sh in e an d r ain bow s an d f low er s at ever y m en t ion of you r loyalt y, f r ien dlin ess, social sk ills. An d it m ost cer t ain ly is not t h e h u g you sh ar e w it h you r m om , ever y m or n in g an d n igh t , as sh e t ells you h ow m u ch sh e loves you .

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Th e Pow er of Posit ive Speech Kik i Robin son I h ave an Au t ist ic br ot h er

We r epu lsive h u m an s,

Com plet ely n on -ver bal.

Dr ow n in n egat ivit y An d dr am a

Alr eady 12.

Day by day w it h ou t r ealizin g.

Bu t yet , Hasn?t spok en a sin gle syllable.

Let t h is be a lear n in g exper ien ce f or u s.

Wait in g t o explode

If I w as n on -ver bal,

Wit h qu est ion s

I h ope you r body w ou ld ach e w it h

An d an sw er s.

gu ilt For w ast in g you r pr eciou s w or ds.

All of h is t h ou gh t s ar e t r apped in side of h im .

I beg you , I look at h im

Speech is t oo pow er f u l,

An d m y body ach es

Use you r w or ds posit ively As Tan i w ou ld w ish t o say.

I am gu ilt y.

Ever yday Ever y m in u t e Negat ive Wor ds Slippin g f r om m y im pu lsive m ou t h As if I?m h u r lin g vom it .

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Fou r t een Noa Br asch Un der t h e cu r ved st air case in t h e r ed livin g r oom

On e t ou ch an d m y f in ger s w ou ld be u n st oppable

I f ou n d t h e lon ely pian o st an din g silen t ly Wait in g f or it ?s k eys t o be pr essed

Un t il m y f in ger s w ou ld collapse

I gazed at t h e em pt y h ou se an d t h e bar r en

Bu t I w ou ld pu sh t h em t o t h eir lim it s

ben ch

M y par en t s w ou ld be pr ou d, pr ou d of

I w as f ou r t een

M y display of self -disciplin e ?Noa, pian o is a m icr ocosm of you r lif e?

I loved t h e pian o I w as f ou r t een

Or did m y par en t s f or ce m e t o love it ?

Big, glist en in g legs an d br ow n body

Sn apped t o r ealit y by m y sist er ?s

It ?s over h ead, w ide open

Ten se f oot st eps

52 eggsh ell w h it e k eys ju xt aposed t o 36

Sh e f illed t h e em pt y spot on t h e ben ch

ch ar coal black k eys

Her f in ger s h ast in gly gr asped t h e

Illu m in at in g t h e pear ly sh im m er

m et r on om e

Th e m u t e m et r on om e begged f or m y su pple

t ick ed it t o a st agger in g 170

t ou ch

Her h an ds slipped t o h er side t h en

Th e qu est ion w as bot h er in g m e

gr acef u lly

Wh y w as I h esit an t ?

Laced on e n ot e, t w o n ot es, in f in it e n ot es

I w as f ou r t een

I st ood an d st ar ed at m y f ailed f in ger s I w as f ou r t een

Th e br ow n m ar ble ben ch dr essed in plu sh velvet Was t h r ee sm all st eps aw ay Black or w h it e, black or w h it e en dless possibilit ies cir cled t h r ou gh m y dr ain ed br ain

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Gossip Sh ir a Coh en It 's lik e a f low er .

Lik e a pu r ple m or n in g glor y Wh ose pet als ar e all closed u p, t igh t an d con t ain ed.

Som et im es t h e f low er open s, Alm ost by acciden t Bu t n ot qu it e.

Wh en t h e pet als f all loose, it ?s h ar d t o h old t h em , Har d t o m ak e su r e t h ey st ay close.

Bu t w h en t h e f low er h as alr eady open ed u p It doesn't r et u r n back t o h ow it w as.

It can f loat .

Ready t o f ly aw ay in t h e w in d An d lan d in t h e h an d of a st r an ger .

Bu t t h er e ar e alw ays n ew pet als Th e so-t h ou gh t -sof t , h ar m less pu r ple w h isper s of t h em Th at can be dr ied u p an d br ok en apar t Su dden ly t h ou gh Wit h ou t r ealizin g.

Alm ost by acciden t

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A Sn ow y Day Tzippy David

Alt h ou gh t h e su n h as bar ely begu n t o r ise, t h e gar den is f u ll of sh r iek s of joy.

A lit t le gir l r u n s t h r ou gh t h e sn ow , h er sm all, sm oot h h an ds dig t h r ou gh t h e clean , sof t sn ow.

Th e at m osph er e sm ells of f r esh air , it seem s so t h ick as if you w ou ld be able t o t ou ch you r br eat h as you see it com e ou t of you r m ou t h .

Th e gar den is f u ll of t all, t h ick pin e t r ees, Th eir dif f er en t sh ades of gr een t h e on ly color seen except f or t h e w h it e of t h e sn ow : Un t il t h e su n r ise f lash es beau t if u l, dazzlin g r eds, or an ges, an d yellow s acr oss t h e h or izon .

Beh in d t h e gar den , cover ed in a t h ick w h it e blan k et , a r ow of h ou ses sit s qu iet ly in t h e ear ly m or n in g ligh t .

Each h ou se per f ect ly m at ch in g t h e n ext all sit t in g in a n eat r ow.

Th e lit t le gir l st an ds on h er t ipt oes, St r et ch in g h er sm all body t o t h e lim it .

As sh e r each es u p t o place a car r ot on t h e n ose of a sn ow m an , in w h ich sh e h as spen t cou n t less, pr eciou s m in u t es cr eat in g.

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In side t h e h ou se, f r om w h er e, Th e par en t s silen t ly w at ch t h eir dau gh t er play.

A f ly bu zzes by.

It n u zzles it s sm all body in t o a pr et t y, pin k peon y.

Wh er e it s bu zzes, h u m alon g t h e ot h er w ise qu iet r oom .

Pleasan t an d w on der f u l, Th e cr eat ion of blissf u l m em or ies.

I sit on t h e por ch of t h e h ou se, w at ch in g m y lit t le sist er play in t h e sn ow ign or an t t o t h e w or ld ar ou n d h er .

I f eel h appin ess su r ge t h r ou gh m e as sh e en joys t h e sh ar p, cold w eat h er lik e I can n o lon ger do.

M y gloveless f in ger s gr ow n u m b as t h e cold en gu lf s t h em .

Again an d again I w at ch m y sist er ?s cr eat ion s com e t o lif e, A n ew w or ld of possibilit ies u n f olds bef or e m y eyes.

If you st ood on t h e por ch , you r eyes w ou ld open w ide at t h e beau t y of t h e su n r ise.

You w ou ld be dr aw n t o t h e sn ow an d t h e w or ld you can cr eat e w it h it .

Aw ay you w ou ld go in t o t h e cr eat ive m in d of a you n g ch ild.

An d you w ou ld n ever w an t t o gr ow u p.

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A Color f u l Seah or se Zoe Nu ssbau m Th e vibr an t ly color ed yellow Seah or se, sw im m in g ar ou n d Th e lar ge cor al r eef

Blen din g in Wit h t h e vivid color ed cor al To pr ot ect h im self f r om pr edat or s Wait in g f or t h em t o pass by Bef or e h e sw im s f r eely

It ?s as if h e is Pau sin g u n t il h e k n ow s His su r r ou n din gs ar e saf e

He m ay n ot k n ow it , Bu t h is cam ou f lage allow s h im To r em ain saf e u n t il h e Feels it ?s h is t im e t o f lou r ish

I, t oo, w ait u n t il I f eel m ost pr ot ect ed To br eak m y sh ell An d u n leash m y in n er color s.

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Piece of Clay Or iya Falk

I am a piece of clay in you r eyes Alr eady m olded, dr ied, an d f ir ed Im m alleable I sit on a sh elf Next t o all t h e ot h er pieces of clay Fr om w h ich I am n ear ly in dist in gu ish able in you r eyes.

Pieces of clay do n ot m ak e n oise Bu t I lon g f or you t o list en t o m y voice.

Voicelessn ess, At t im es, is alm ost u n bear able-Even f or a lu m p of clay.

On occasion , I dr eam of bein g pu sh ed of f t h e sh elf To sh at t er u pon im pact w it h t h e gr ou n d below Not t o die, Bu t in h opes t h at I cou ld t ak e t h e f or m Of a m illion beam in g sh ar ds Each on e u n iqu e, Fr ee f r om t h e pr econ cept ion s Th at w eigh dow n a piece of clay.

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How t o Fin ish a Race Sh ir a David Wh en you ar r ive ear ly w it h t h e r est of t h e var sit y t eam , t r y t o act con f iden t , even t h ou gh t h er e ar e a m illion bu t t er f lies in you r st om ach .

Tell t h em t h at you w ill all r u n you r h ar dest an d t h at all t h eir h ar d w or k h as pr epar ed t h em f or t h is.

List en t o t h eir w or r ies as you slow ly st r et ch ou t ever y m u scle. Reassu r e t h em .

Tell t h em t h at t h eir t im es ar e sign if ican t ly f ast er t h an t h e r est of t h e com pet it ion an d t h at t h ey h ave n ot h in g t o f ear .

Wat ch t h eir eyes f lick er w it h f ear as you ar e t old t o go t o t h e st ar t in g lin e. Th e r ace w ill begin at t h e sou n d of t h e gu n .

Feel you r h ear t pou n d in you r ch est as t h e blast f ir es an d you t ak e of f .

Rem em ber all you r past r aces an d t r ain in g t h is season w h ich br ou gh t you t o t h is m om en t .

Realize t h at ever y t im e you decided n ot t o qu it du r in g t h e h ar d pr act ices it w as pr epar in g you f or t h is m om en t . St or e t h at aw ay t o t ell t h e f r esh m an w h o join t h e t eam n ext year . For give you r coach es scr eam in g an d in su lt s, k n ow in g t h at it w as all t o h elp you su cceed.

Fall in t o an easy r h yt h m , cr u isin g r igh t beh in d you r sist er in secon d place.

Ign or e t h e deep pu ddles as t h ey splash m u d u p you r leg an d soak you r sh oes.

Feel con f iden t as you see t h e h ill w h ich m ar k s t h e en d of t h e f ir st m ile appr oach in g.

See you r t eam w ait in g at t h e t op an d ch eer in g f or you .

Pick u p t h e pace an d do h igh k n ees u p t h e h ill t h e w ay you w er e t au gh t t o.

Won der if it r eally is possible t o get a per son al r ecor d on t h is cou r se.

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Tr y n ot t o k eel over in pain as you su dden ly f eel a r ip you r k n ee.

St r u ggle t o cat ch you r br eat h as you r lu n gs bu r n .

Tell you r con cer n ed t eam m at es t o k eep goin g an d t o f in ish st r on g f or you .

Adju st you r k n ee br ace an d k eep goin g, f eelin g a sh oot in g pain in ever y st ep, det er m in ed t o f in ish t h is r ace.

Hope t h at you r t eam w on?t su f f er becau se of you r t im e, an d w at ch as r u n n er s con t in u e t o pass you u p.

Reach t h e secon d m ile in t ear s. Tell you r coach you don?t t h in k you can do it . Dr ag you r in ju r ed leg ar ou n d t h e cor n er as you decide t o t r y.

St ar t w it h a slow jog an d t h en slow ly pick u p you r speed. Tell you r self t h at you can do it an d t h at t h er e is n o pain in you r k n ee.

Realize t h at you h ave ju st passed u p an ot h er gr ou p of gir ls an d t h at you h ave a ch an ce of f in ish in g in t h e t op t en . Pick u p t h e speed despit e you r k n ee an d you r bu r n in g lu n gs. Tell you r self t h at it ?s ju st m in d over m at t er , an d t h at n ot h in g can st op you . As you r ou n d t h e cor n er f or t h e f in al st r et ch begin t o spr in t as h ar d as you can . Don?t let t h e gir l r igh t beh in d you pass you u p.

Sigh w it h disappoin t m en t as t h ey h an d you t h e n in t h place r ibbon , bu t k n ow you gave it ever yt h in g you cou ld.

Beam w it h pr ide as you r coach es t ell you t h at t w o of you r t eam m at es dr opped ou t an d t h at if you h adn?t f in ish ed t h e t eam w ou ld h ave lost .

Kn ow t h at t h er e ar e m or e r aces t o com e an d t h at you w ill on ly get bet t er f r om h er e. Pr om ise you r self t o n ever qu it or lose f ait h in you r self again , k n ow in g t h at you r gr it w on t h e en t ir e r ace.

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I am Fr om Rach el Neu m an I am f r om f u zzy blan k et s, I am f r om sn ack s an d pain t in gs.

I am f r om t h e br igh t r ed f r on t door s.

I am f r om t h e t u lips, t h e r ose bu sh w h ose lon g lim bs I r em em ber as if t h ey w er e m y ow n .

I?m f r om t h e kepelah (n am in g by siblin gs) t o each n am e an d dom in an t eyebr ow s, f r om Yoch eved an d Jon at h an .

I?m f r om com edian s an d t h e sar cast ic, An d f r om n er vou s lau gh t er .

I?m f r om ?Be car ef u l? an d ?Dr ive saf e" An d ?I love you t o t h e m oon an d back .?

I?m f r om f ain t er s.

I?m f r om Illin ois an d Fr an ce, Kneidel (m at za ball) an d ch ocolat e ch ip cook ies.

Fr om bein g par t ially scalped by a f an , Tw o year s old an d n in e st aples.

Br on ze St ar M edal.

I am f r om a velvet box in t h e t op dr aw er of t h e dr esser in Gr an dm a D?s r oom .

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Fif t een Sar ah Rosen blu m I?m on t h e w ay h om e f r om Tar get on Tou h y Ave It ?s a br eezy su m m er af t er n oon w it h t h e su n f illin g t h e sk y I gen t ly r each ed f or m y n ew ly pu r ch ased pon yt ails Th e f r esh cr isp scen t of elast ic pier ced m y n ose It w as sat isf yin g m or e t h an it w as pain f u l Each on e as f law less as t h e n ext I w as f if t een I adm ir ed t h e pack of sim ple black pon yt ails Per f ect ly st ack ed u pon an ot h er , as clean as can be Illu st r at in g an u n f am iliar sen se of adven t u r e Th ey gave m e a n ew f ou n d f eelin g of f r eedom I f ou n d m yself at ease I w as f if t een I pu lled m y h air ou t of m y f ace in t o an ef f or t less pon yt ail Un veilin g m y f air f r eck led sk in t o t h e w or ld Gr an t ed t h e abilit y t o do an yt h in g m y h ear t desir ed Th e sim ple object h ad m y t r u st I pon der ed on w h o I w as I w as f if t een Pop! Th e sn apped pon yt ail br ou gh t m e back Lu sciou s r ed lock s h id m y f ace f r om t h e w or ld Adven t u r e disappear ed Fr eedom van ish ed Placin g all of m y t r u st in t o t h is pon yt ail, It h ollow ed ou t m y spir it M y h air w as dow n I w as f if t een

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Cr eole M ich elle Babajon i This piece is written in response to the story Can You Cook Creole? by Maya Angelou Dear Rit a Joh n son , You m igh t n ot r em em ber m e. M y n am e is Jason M ich ael. Fif t een year s ago I u sed t o com e t o Th e Cr eole Caf e ever y day w it h a f ew of m y old f r ien ds an d m y siblin gs. I r eside in New Yor k Cit y n ow w it h m y w on der f u l w if e an d t h r ee pr eciou s ch ildr en . I open ed m y ow n sm all join t in Br ook lyn an d w as t h in k in g abou t you r caf e. M y f am ily an d I h ave been t h r ou gh a lot t o m ak e en ds m eet ;I h ad f ive jobs an d n ever get t o see m y w if e an d ch ildr en . For t h e past f ew year s it ?s been h ar d. It w as a dif f icu lt decision t o open m y ow n join t sin ce w e h ave been st r u gglin g a lot , bu t t h an k s t o m y car in g w if e an d ch ildr en I f ollow ed m y dr eam s.

M y f ir st ch ild, Em ily, h as t o w r it e f or sch ool a r epor t abou t t h e dif f er en t cu lt u r es an d f ood ar ou n d t h e w or ld. Em ily is a st r on g t h ir t een -year -old you n g lady w h o h as a h ear t of gold. Sh e cou ldn?t im agin e people bein g u n k in d based on r ace or cu lt u r e. We live in a diver se com m u n it y w h er e ever yon e is accept in g of each ot h er . Wh ile Em ily k n ow s sh e is par t Cr eole, t h is is a par t of h er lif e w h ich sh e doesn?t k n ow m u ch abou t . It is m y h ope t h at af t er t h is t r ip t h at sh e lear n s abou t h er f am ily ?s back gr ou n d.

I t old h er abou t t h e am azin g Caf e m y f r ien ds an d I u sed t o go t o, w it h t h e best Cr eole f ood I?ve ever h ad. Sh e w as in t er est ed an d w an t ed t o lear n m or e abou t it . M y w h ole f am ily is goin g on a r oad t r ip an d ar e st oppin g in Lou isian a t o visit m y f olk s. M y f olk s an d I h aven?t spok en in f ou r t een year s, ever sin ce I decided t o leave Lou isian a an d t h eir sh oe bu sin ess beh in d. Th ey alw ays m ade it clear t h at if I ever lef t , t h ey didn't w an t t o con t in u e con t act w it h m e. Wh en I w as get t in g m ar r ied, I t r ied t o r each ou t t o t h em , bu t t h er e w as n o an sw er . M y br ot h er s also t r ied t o get t h em t o at t en d m y w eddin g, bu t t h ey r ef u sed.

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A f ew m on t h s ago t h is all ch an ged. Af t er m y f at h er w as diagn osed w it h can cer , m y par en t s r each ed ou t t o m e. Th ey decided t h at w e n eeded t o see each ot h er bef or e it w as t oo lat e.

Becau se m y ch ildr en h ad n ever m et t h eir gr an dpar en t s, w e?ve decided t o st op by w h ile on ou r r oad t r ip.

Sin ce w e ar e goin g t o be in t ow n w e w er e w on der in g if w e can com e t o you r caf e an d gain m or e per spect ive of ou r Cr eole cu lt u r e. M y dau gh t er w as ask in g m e abou t ou r cu lt u r e an d it w as n ot easy t o t h in k an d r elive t h ose m om en t s in m y h ead. I r em em ber w h en I w as in h igh sch ool, m y m am a t old m e t o go t o t h e m ar k et an d pick u p som e m ilk . Wh en I ar r ived, t h e m an at t h e cou n t er r ef u sed t o let m e sh op at h is st or e. I can st ill h ear h is w or ds r epeat in g in m y m in d. ? Get t h e h ell ou t m y sh op, w e don't ser ve you r k in d?. Even t o t h is day w h en ever I go t o t h e m ar k et t h ese dr eadf u l w or ds con t in u e ech oin g in m y ear s.

I w as so t h an k f u l t h at I h ad you r caf e t o go t o w h er e I cou ld f eel w elcom ed. I don?t w an t an y of m y ch ildr en t o ever exper ien ce r acism f or bein g an Af r ican Am er ican Cr eole m an or w om an as I did. I h ave m em or ies abou t sit t in g in you r caf e on t h e bar st ool w on der in g abou t m y f u t u r e. I r em em ber w h en I w as 18 year s old sit t in g in on e of you r boot h s an d decidin g t o m ove New Yor k .

Livin g in New Yor k h as br ou gh t w on der f u l oppor t u n it ies in t o bot h m in e an d m y f am ily ?s lif e.

I?m t h an k f u l t h at I h ave f ollow ed m y dr eam s an d h ave a t h r ivin g join t . M aybe on ou r visit you can sh ar e a f ew of you r au t h en t ic Cr eole r ecipes, so I can sh ar e t h em w it h m y cu st om er s. I look f or w ar d t o you m eet in g m y f am ily an d addin g a sen se of w h er e I cam e f r om in t o t h eir lives.

Sin cer ely, Jason M ich ael

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Som et h in g bu t Not h in g Or iya Falk

I t h ou gh t I saw som et h in g Spar k lin g, in t h e cor n er of m y eye Bu t it w as n ot h in g.

Not h in g bu t t h e su n ligh t I t h ou gh t I saw Wh ile con t em plat in g t h e m oon?s cou n t en an ce

Th e cou n t en an ce w h ile r adian t , Was an illu sion Su st ain ed by t h e m in d?s eye

I su st ain ed t h e Idea of w ar m t h Lon g en ou gh t o r ealize t h e ch ill

Th e ch ill lon g ago given w ay t o f r ost -Bit e Pain f u l on ly u pon r ealizat ion .

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To m y Au n t Lau r a Talie M ish ie I w alk ou t in m y pin k , f low y dr ess, m y h air an d m ak eu p don e, I?m r eady t o leave. Lau r a look s m e u p an d dow n w it h h er big br ow n eyes an d says, ?You ar e ju st so beau t if u l, m y pr in cess,? an d h u gs m e. We bot h w ok e u p at 4 am t h at m or n in g t o get r eady, bot h h ad ou r h air an d m ak eu p don e, bot h com plet ely dr essed, bu t on ly on e of u s is r eady t o go.

Ou r h u g is in t er r u pt ed by t h e sou n d of t h e door h it t in g t h e w all becau se Jef f er y is st r u gglin g t o r oll h im self in t o t h e r oom . Wh en h e f in ally m ak es it t h r ou gh h e says, ?M om I n eed t o u se t h e bat h r oom .?, Lau r a look s back at h er son an d says, ?Ok Jef f , on e secon d, I h ave t o h elp M ar k f ir st .?

I w alk ar ou n d t h e h ou se look in g f or m y ph on e so t h at I can leave f or t h e par t y, w h ile Lau r a h elps h er t w o disabled son s u se t h e bat h r oom , dr ess u p, an d eat . It h as on ly been t w en t y m in u t es sin ce sh e f in ish ed get t in g h er h air don e an d pu t t in g on h er dr ess, bu t Lau r a h as pu t h er h air u p in a bu n an d ch an ged in t o com f or t able clot h es, so t h at it w ou ld be easier f or h er , a pet it e w om an , t o lif t h er h eavy, eleven -year -old son f r om h is w h eelch air t o a seat at t h e din in g t able, so t h at h e w ou ldn't f eel lef t ou t . I begin t o w alk ou t of t h e door an d yell ou t t o Lau r a, ?I?m leavin g, please don't be lat e? t o w h ich sh e r espon ds, ?Ok , h on ey, bye, I w ill t r y n ot t o be.? Bef or e I close t h e door I look at Lau r a, m y au n t , an d I r ealize t h at sh e h as been sm ilin g t h r ou gh ou t t h e en t ir e day-- as sh e w as h u ggin g m e, h elpin g h er son s t o t h e bat h r oom , lif t in g t h em f r om t h eir w h eelch air s. Sh e h as n ot let an yt h in g get t h e w ay of h appin ess, w h ich is w h y I look u p t o h er .

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Ju st On e Sh abbat M elin da Bu r gin Th e pict u r e is sm all, zoom ed in on t h r ee t een age gir ls. Th ey ar e sm ilin g, w ide gr in s t h at spr ead over t h eir en t ir e f aces. Tw o ar e sit t in g in t h e sam e sch ool bu s seat , an d t h e t h ir d is beh in d t h em , h er h ead an d h an d r est in g on t h e t op of t h eir seat . Her su n br ow n h an d w ear s ch ipped m agen t a n ail polish . On e gir l?s blon d h ead is t ilt ed alm ost en t ir ely on t o h er f r ien d?s sh ou lder , h er pear l h eadban d cau gh t in t h e m agen t a lace of h er dr ess. Th ey ar e sit t in g by a w in dow , t h e br illian t su n ligh t r ef lect in g on t o t h e gr ey bu s seat , an d h igh ligh t in g t h e dar k ch est n u t h air of t h e t w o ot h er gir ls. Th e gir l closest t o t h e w in dow w ear s t w o silver n eck laces an d a r oyal pu r ple New Yor k Un iver sit y lan yar d, con t r ast in g sh ar ply again st h er pale sk in .

Ju st m in u t es bef or e t h is pict u r e w as t ak en , w e w er e r u sh in g t o get t o t h e bu s, lau gh in g as w e r an w it h ou r sh oppin g bag laden ar m s lin k ed, back f r om a last m in u t e t r ip t o H&M . It w as on ly a f ew sh or t h ou r s bef or e t h e last Sh abbat of ou r su m m er pr ogr am w ou ld begin . We cou ld n ot be lat e t o t h e big yellow bu s t h at w ou ld t ak e u s ou t of New Yor k Cit y, an d in t o t h e qu iet su bu r b w h er e w e w ou ld spen d t h is Sh abbat . Th e at m osph er e h ad an air of excit em en t , an d of t h e bit t er sw eet n ess of t h ose last f ew days, w h er e ever y m om en t f elt pr eciou s an d st olen f r om t h e r u sh of t im e. M y f r ien ds an d I- alw ays a t igh t gr ou p- w er e ever m or e at t ach ed, an d t h is ph ot o of m y t w o best f r ien ds an d m e w as on e of t h e ver y m an y t ak en t h at w eek en d.

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I h ad in it iat ed t h is par t icu lar ph ot o, som et h in g I don't n or m ally do. I w as f u lly pr esen t in t h is m om en t , t oo h appy t o w ait f or an yon e else t o act f ir st . Th ou gh t h is w as t h e last Sh abbat , an d t h e on e leadin g in t o Tish a B'Av, I did n ot h ave t im e f or sor r ow ju st yet . I w as f u ll of on ly possibilit y an d an t icipat ion f or w h at t h is Sh abbat an d w eeken d w ou ld br in g.

Th e pict u r e n ow br in gs back m em or ies of n ot ju st t h is capt u r ed m om en t , bu t of t h e Sh abbat t h at f ollow ed. It w as m ade u p of m om en t s like t h at on e, h appy an d pu r e, bu t h ad t h e elect r ic ch ar ge t h at on ly last t h in gs do. Spu r r ed on by t h e people su r r ou n din g m e, I squ eezed ou t ever y ou n ce of in spir at ion possible, det er m in ed t o car r y it in t o Tish a B'av. I don?t r em em ber ever f eelin g so con n ect ed, t o t h e people ar ou n d m e, or t h e t ext s I lear n ed. Th r ou gh ou t t h e pr ogr am , 6 w eek s in New Yor k Cit y lear n in g Gem ar a an d en gagin g w it h t h e cit y ar ou n d u s, t h e en er gy h ad been am azin g, bu t t h is w eeken d, t h e ext r a f ocu s w as com in g f r om m e.

Th at Sat u r day n igh t , as I sat in t h e sam e seat on t h e sam e yellow bu s, t h e m ood w as def in it ely dif f er en t . Tish a B'av h ad begu n , an d in st ead of t h e bu zz of excit ed ch at t er , m ou r n f u l t u n es an d cr yin g voices f illed t h e air . Look in g back , h ow ever t h ey ar e bot h par t of t h e sam e m em or y, of a w eeken d t h at ch an ged an d sh aped m e t oday. Sin ce t h at pict u r e w as t aken , I h ave lau gh ed an d cr ied w it h t h ose sam e gir ls. I ch an t ed Eich a f or t h e f ir st t im e, an exper ien ce t h at m ade t r agedy r eal an d vivid t o m e, bu t also em pow er ed m e, m ak in g m e f eel like a par t of m y h ist or y an d Jew ish h er it age. Wh en I look at t h is pict u r e, I see t h e h or r or of Tish a B'av an d t h e joy of Sh abbat . I see f r ien dsh ip like I h ad n ever k n ow n bef or e. I see m yself gr ow in g in t o m or e of a doer , an d f eelin g m or e su r e of m y r ole an d place. I see a r em in der t o appr eciat e an d seize ever y m om en t . I see an en din g, bu t also a begin n in g of t h e n ext joyf u l Sh abbat t o com e.

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Obst acle Ch avie Zeller Lock M et al, clasp Spin n in g, st r u gglin g, f ast en in g Tr apped w it h in a com bin at ion Key

Agin g Rebeca Pr ice Ch ild Naive, you t h f u l Lau gh in g, playin g, car ef r ee Recess, bir t h day, lear n in g, class St r essed, t ir ed, em pt y Disillu sion ed, aged Adu lt

Wat er Sar ah Sh in er Wat er Clear , pu r e Flow in g, Hydr at in g, dr ippin g Sou r ce of all lif e 32

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H 2O

Fash ion is M y Revolu t ion Taliah Soleym an i ?Ar t is eit h er plagiar ism or r evolu t ion .? ?Pau l Gau gu in . Wh at is you r ?ar t ?? Is it plagiar ism or r evolu t ion ?

Oct ober 18, 2004. M y ch eek s ar e t h e size of t w o w at er balloon s w ait in g t o be popped. I h op ou t of m y car seat in a beau t if u l pin k t u lle dr ess as t en m om s all h ave t h eir eyes glu ed on m e, an d m y t h r ee year old m in d assu m es t h at t h ey also k n ow t h at I am a pr in cess. Alt h ou gh I do n ot r ealize it t h en , t h is m om en t is t h e begin n in g of societ y pu t t in g pr essu r e on m e f or h ow I look . An d sin ce t h e begin n in g, I let t h em . I t h r ive u n der pr essu r e. I w as qu iet , bu t m y clot h es w er e lou d. I w as a pr in cess st an din g at t h e f or ef r on t of m y r evolu t ion .

Ju n e 28, 2006. Th e n igh t bef or e m y cam p t r ip, I r u sh t o m y m om ?s st u dio in m y basem en t w it h h opes of t u r n in g m y solid blu e cam p sh ir t t h at t w en t y ot h er ch ildr en w ill be w ear in g in t o som et h in g u n iqu e?G-d f or bid I look lik e an yon e else. Bow s, pom -pom s, f r in ges, an d beads I began t o f or m m y bat t le plan .

Au gu st 26, 2014. Th is t im e I am h oppin g ou t of t h e passen ger seat ar m ed in m y velvet dr ess t h at m at ch es m y n ew ly per m ed r ed h air an d f ish n et t igh t s. M y m om h ad pr each ed t h at per m s ar e r et r o, bu t I w an t ed t o br in g t h em back .

Oct ober 13, 2015. As I t r u dge t h r ou gh t h e m u d of m y bat t lef ield, also k n ow n as h igh sch ool, I w ear m y silver plat f or m com bat boot s w h ile t h e opposin g side is u n if or m ly dr essed in st ar k w h it e Adidas su per st ar s. St an din g in m y f ive f oot on e f or m , m y h eigh t does n ot h old m e back as I t ow er over ever yon e in t h ese sh oes.

Au gu st 28, 2016. I h ave been am bu sh ed by t h e in st allat ion of a u n if or m . Th ey believe in t h e su ccess of t h eir at t ack ; h ow ever , I am n ot af r aid t o pu sh t h e lim it s. Alt er in g t h e sleeves an d len gt h s of m y u n if or m sh ir t s an d sk ir t s, I pr evail in h igh ligh t in g m y in dividu alit y. Som e of t h e ot h er s t r y t o be lik e m e by t ak in g t h eir sk ir t s t o a seam st r ess, bu t lit t le do t h ey k n ow , I did it m yself .

M y ar t , m y or igin alit y, m y r evolu t ion . I began an u pr ise again st societ y ?s n or m s an d expect at ion s, n ot allow in g t h em t o br in g m e dow n . It w as m e again st t h e w or ld, an d I n ever let an yon e t ell m e t h at I w as in f er ior . It becam e m y m ission , m y st r en gt h , m y dest in y. I r ealized h ow I t r an sf or m ed f r om a sh y, ch u bby gir l t o a passion at e w om an . I desir ed so badly t o sh ar e t h is ou t look w it h ot h er s, an d in m y sch ools f ash ion sh ow I ch ose t o be a h ead st ylist in or der t o t r an slat e ot h er w om en?s in dividu al per son alit ies in t o r evolu t ion ar y ou t f it s. Addit ion ally, as I pu r su e t h is in t er est ou t side of sch ool, specif ically at m y Nor dst r om in t er n sh ip, I f in d m yself su r r ou n ded by f ive f oot t en , f air sk in n ed, blon de, an d t h in w om en . I am sh or t an d Per sian ; m y h er it age sh in es t h r ou gh m y appear an ce. Even am on g ot h er s w h o h ave join ed m y r evolu t ion , I am an an om aly.

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Her o Abigail Br asch Hero- ?a per son n ot ed f or cou r ageou s act s or n obilit y of ch ar act er , som eon e r egar ded as a r ole m odel?

M y br ain f elt block ed w h en I f ir st open ed u p m y w or d docu m en t t o begin t ypin g abou t m y h er o.

Wh en r eadin g over t h is assign m en t , I t h ou gh t I w ou ld qu ick ly f in d som eon e an d n ot h ave t o exh or t m u ch ef f or t in t o t h e pr oject . Wh en I f in ally sat dow n t o w r it e, n obody cam e t o m y m in d so I t u r n ed t o Google. ?Her os?- I t yped t h is in t o t h e sear ch bar u n t il I r ealized I n eeded m or e specif icat ion . ?Ch ildr en h er os?- I decided t o be or igin al, as ever yon e in m y class ch ose adu lt s, bu t st ill, t h is w as t oo vagu e. ?Ch ildr en h er oes of t h e h olocau st ?- I st u m bled u pon a f ew n am es: An n e Fr an k , M ir iam Wat t en ber g, Elie Wiesel. I at t em pt ed w r it in g abou t each of t h ese n am es; h ow ever , each t im e I f elt I w as n ot w r it in g t h e t r u t h . I r ealized t h at I n eeded t o f in d M Y h er o n ot A h er o.

Af t er a n igh t 's r est , w h en I r et u r n ed t o class, t h e m ajor it y of gir ls w er e pr esen t in g an d it cam e t o m e. M y h er o w as n ot som eon e on Google labeled ?h er o,? n ot even u n der ?ch ildr en h er oes of t h e h olocau st .? M y h er o w as som eon e w h o w as closer t o m e. I look ed at t h is per son daily. I t alk ed t o t h is per son daily. I sm iled w it h t h is per son daily. I at e, dr an k , an d slept in t h e sam e h ou se as t h is per son daily. I r ealized t h at m y h er o w as m y dad.

I did n ot ch oose m y dad f or h is in t egr it y, loyalt y, h u m ilit y, or per sever an ce. I did n ot ch oose m y dad becau se h e w or k ed lon g h ou r s f or t h e w alls t h at I call m y h om e, f or t h e f ood at ever y m eal, or f or t h e clot h es on m y back . I did n ot ch oose m y dad f or pr ovidin g m e w it h a Jew ish edu cat ion , or f or st r en gt h en in g m y Jew ish iden t it y. I did n ot ch oose m y dad f or m ar r yin g m y am azin g m om an d givin g m e f ive am azin g siblin gs. Alt h ou gh t h ese t h in gs ar e all t r u e, t h ese w er e n ot t h e r eason s t h at I t h ou gh t of m y dad w h en gir l af t er gir l r ead t h eir h er o essays in class.

I ch ose m y dad becau se w h en I look at h im , it is im possible f or m e t o com pr eh en d t h e ext en t t o w h ich h is h ear t expan ds. It is dif f icu lt f or m e t o t r y an d explain t h e am azin g w ay t h at m y dad devot ed h is lif e t o ot h er s?h appin ess. I can at t em pt t o explain t h is w it h a f ive digit n u m ber : 20,000. To som eon e w h o does n ot k n ow m y dad, t h is n u m ber h olds n o sign if ican ce. How ever , t h is n u m ber is t h e on ly w ay I can t h in k of t o descr ibe ju st h ow lar ge m y dad?s h ear t is. 20,000- babies t h at w ou ld n ot be br eat h in g t oday if it w er e n ot f or m y dad. 20,000- m ot h er s t h at w er e t old t h ey w ou ld n ever con ceive, yet som eh ow got t h e ch an ce t o h old t h eir m ir acle babies m on t h s lat er .

20,000- t im es a m ot h er h ear d t h e w or d ?m om m y ? com e ou t of a bein g, t h eir ch ild, w h o w asn?t su pposed t o h appen , w h o w ou ld h ave ceased t o exist . 20,000- gr adu at ion s, bir t h days, an d m ar r iages t h at w er e m er ely m ot h er ?s f an t asies, yet som eh ow m ade r ealit y. 20,000- t ear s of m ot h er s w h o look ed at m y dad w it h t h eir babies in t h eir ar m s, an d t h an k ed h im f or t h eir m ir acle.

Google?s f ir st descr ipt ion of Joel Br asch is: ?Obst et r ics an d Gyn ecology ?

M in e is: ?M y h er o?

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Salm on Nat h an Sh apir o Th is beau t if u l or an ge-pin k salm on , sw im m in g u pst r eam again st t h e cu r r en t of t h e r iver t o con t in u e in t h e lin k ,

Con st an t ly ju st ou t of t h e r each of a h u n gr y bear , r eady t o eat din n er on t h e beach .

It ?s as if a st r in g of code w as Im plan t ed in it s br ain , Con st an t ly t ellin g h im w h en t h e t im e com es--t o Figh t t h e t ide.

As h e en t er s in t o dan ger ou s ar eas h e n eeds con cen t r at ion

Alt h ou gh h e doesn?t k n ow it yet , He w ill soon cr eat e a n ew gen er at ion .

An d, I t oo don?t k n ow As I en t er n ew st ages of lif e Ch allen ge by ch allen ge, Will con t in u e t o f igh t t h e t ide(?)

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Th e Well Daph n a Czak o I w as bor n f r om car ef u l h an ds an d joyf u l f aces. A cou ple in love car r ied r ock s f r om t h e t ow n n ext door in a w agon . Th ey decided t o set t le dow n ar ou n d a lit t le h ill an d I w as t o be placed at t h e ver y t op. Th e bu ilder s cam e t h e n ext day an d car ved t h e r ock s ju st t h e w ay t h e cou ple w an t ed it . I of cou r se w asn?t bor n yet .

All t h is I h ear d f r om dist an t con ver sat ion s t h at f loat ed t h r ou gh m y w alls.

On t h e f ou r t h day of spr in g, f in ally, I w as pu t in t o cr eat ion , an d in t h e m on t h s t h at f ollow ed it w as m y pr ide t o w at ch t h eir love t u r n in t o a ch ild, an d t h en t w o, t h r ee, an d f in ally f ou r . Th ey r an u p an d dow n t h e sides of t h e h ills, sh r iek in g an d lau gh in g in t h e su n . Th eir par en t s w ou ld call t o t h em t o st op r u n n in g ar ou n d on t h e h ill f or f ear t h ey w ou ld f all an d t h e ch ildr en ign or ed t h em . Day in , day ou t .

Th e ch ildr en gr ew older , an d each w eek car ef u lly dr ew w at er f r om m e bef or e lu ggin g it back dow n t h e h ill. Th ey h ad ch ildr en , as w ell, an d t h e cycle con t in u ed f or m an y year s, u n t il, on e day, disast er st r u ck t h e f am ily. A sick n ess w as r acin g t h r ou gh t h e t ow n an d t h e en t ir e f am ily h ad got t en sick . For ced t o m ove aw ay, I w at ch ed as t h e f am ily t r ailed t h eir f in ger s acr oss m y r ock s on e last t im e bef or e t h ey f aded aw ay in t o t h e dist an ce.

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Year af t er year passed an d t h e h ill gr ew r ock y, an d t h e gr ass lon g an d u n car ed f or .

Th e ar ea t h at h ad on ce st ood f u ll of lau gh t er an d love w as n ow desolat e an d em pt y.

I st ar ed at t h e bleak w or ld an d w on der ed if I w ou ld ever see br igh t f aces r u n n in g u p an d dow n t h e h ill or com e u p t o m e t o dr aw som e w at er .

On e day, w h ile I f loat ed in m y et er n al sleep, t w o voices br ok e t h r ou gh . Tw o pair s of h an ds gr abbed t h e sides of m e an d on ce m or e lau gh t er r an g in t h e su r r ou n din g air .

I w at ch ed t h e t w o of t h em r ace back dow n t h e h ill an d t h en u p again , as t h eir par en t s m oved in t o t h e w or n dow n h ou se below. In t h e days t h at f ollow ed, I sw elled w it h h appin ess an d pr ou dly pr esen t ed m y w at er f or t h em t o t ak e t o back h om e. I f ou n d ou t Jack an d Jill w er e t h eir n am es, an d t h e h appiest ch ildr en t h ey w er e, t oo. I h ad t h e pleasu r e of h ear in g t h e ech oes of h appy voices as t h ey r an g dow n m y sides, an d a f am ily livin g t oget h er in t h e su n again .

Th is w asn?t t o be f or lon g u n f or t u n at ely. It seem ed m y f at e w as t o h ave disast er occu r w h er ever I st ood an d exact ly w h en t h e h appin ess w as at it s peak . Th e t w o ch ildr en r an u p t h e h ill on a br igh t su n n y day t o dr aw som e w at er lik e u su al. Th ey sk ipped an d dan ce an d played ar ou n d m y sides. Th ey lau gh ed as t h ey t r ipped on ce an d spilled t h eir pail of w at er dow n t h e h ill. An d I cr ied as t h ey slipped an d f ell h ead over h eel dow n an d dow n an d dow n .

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How t o Over com e a Ch allen ge M eir a Lin zer

Wh en sh e t ells you t h er e is a pr oblem , t r y n ot t o f ear , even t h ou gh you ar e scr eam in g in side.

Kn ow t h at ever yt h in g w ill be ok ay an d t h is w on?t be a lon g pr ocess.

List en t o w h at t h e doct or says an d f ollow h er in st r u ct ion s.

Feel you r legs sh ak e w h en sh e leaves t h e r oom .

Realize t h at you ar e st r on g an d t h is illn ess can n ot con t r ol you .

Hear you r m ot h er say, ?I?m h er e f or you ,? w h en you ar e cr yin g.

Tak e a deep br eat h an d pr ocess you r t h ou gh t s.

Hope t h at t h is w ill be over soon as you leave t h e of f ice.

As you r m ot h er of f er s h er h elp, sit w it h h er an d t alk .

Go t o sch ool an d h an g ou t w it h f r ien ds lik e u su al.

Alw ays r em em ber t h is ch allen ge in t h e back of you r h ead Tell on e f r ien d an d allow t h em t o com f or t you Go t o t h e daily ch eck u ps an d ack n ow ledge h ow f ar you ?ve com e Give you r self t h e ben ef it of t h e dou bt an d t ell you r self ?I can do t h is.?

Believe t h at you ar e st r on g an d can accom plish an yt h in g you pu t you r m in d t o.

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Eigh t y-Th r ee Tzippy David In a sm all r oom in a n u r sin g h om e, An old m an sit s in sof t black ch air .

He sit s t h er e alon e an d silen t w it h h is t h ou gh t s.

As h e st ar es at a black an d w h it e por t r ait f r om h is ch ildh ood Th r ee sm ilin g f aces st ar e u p at h im . He is eigh t y t h r ee.

He look s at t h e sm ilin g f aces, r ecallin g t h e m an y m em or ies h e m ade w it h t h e t w o people w h o ar e w it h h im in t h e pict u r e, h is t w o best f r ien ds.

He r em em ber s t h e m isch ief t h ey cau sed t oget h er , t h e lau gh s t h ey sh ar ed.

A sm ile spr eads acr oss h is f ace as h e r ecalls t h ose h appy t im es. He is eigh t y-t h r ee.

He r em em ber s sh ow in g t h e pict u r e t o h is son , descr ibin g all t h e w on der f u l m om en t s h e h ad w h en h e w as you n g.

How h e an d h is f r ien ds alw ays sh ar ed jok es, an d did all t h eir sch ool w or k t oget h er .

Th at all of t h eir m ot h er ?s t ook t u r n s yellin g at t h em t o st op t h eir silly pr an k s.

How t h ey con t in u ed t h e pr an k s an yw ay. He is eigh t y-t h r ee.

Su dden ly, h e is br ou gh t back in t o t h e pr esen t .

Th e old m an leaves h is you n g an d f it body of t h e past , an d r et u r n s t o h is cu r r en t w r in k led f or m .

Tear s st r eam in t o h is eyes as h e r ecalls t h e f r ien ds w h o ar e lon g gon e, an d h ow h e n ow lives h is lif e alon e in t h e n u r sin g h om e.

Th e old m an pu t aw ay t h e pict u r e, eigh t y-t h r ee.

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Papa's Neck lace Sam m y M oscovit ch M y gr an df at h er lays self less in t h e h ospit al bed Hook ed u p t o m ach in es an d m on it or s m y dad w ou ld w ear h is n eck laces I ask ed ever y t im e t o w ear on e of h is n eck laces He sof t ly t old m e w h en I w as older , I w ou ld be able t o.

M y gr an df at h er gave m e a pr esen t a r eplica of h is n eck lace. t o be w or n in good h ealt h His m ezu zah n eck lace, n ow ou r n eck lace. con t ain in g t h e t ext of Sh em a an exact r eplica of m aybe r em ain con st an t w it h 's n eck lace Kept close t o m y h ear t as possible.

It is t h e piece of t h r ead Th at h olds u s t oget h er It is ou r con n ect ion To on e an ot h er A par t of h im Th at w ill be par t of m e A par t of m e f or ever

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Slow ly bu t Su r ely Ayelet Dallal Slow ly bu t Su r ely Th is sm all color f u l exot ic Tu r t le, cr aw lin g w it h h is sh ell t ow ar ds Wit h t h e vast ocean ah ead of h im .

He m oves w it h h is claw ed f eet Aw ay f r om t h e h ole in t h e san d, h e m ade f or h im self Pu sh in g aside t h e t in y gr ain s t h at su r r ou n d h im .

It ?s as if h e w an t s To get t o see t h e lar ger w or ld Wh er e h e can gr ow w it h t h e r est of h is pack

An d becom e a beau t if u l cr eat u r e.

Alt h ou gh h e is sm all He can r each t h e beau t if u l clear ocean

An d I, t oo w ill r each t h at lar ge allu r in g Ocean bef or e m e det er m in ed t o r each t h e goal Slow ly bu t su r ely I go.

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How Cu r ly Hair Ch an ged m y Lif e M olly St ein A beau t if u l m ess: a seem in gly ir on ic t er m . Wh y is it t h at t h is dich ot om y def in es m e?

Wh en I h it t h e age of 12 an d h ad en t er ed ju n ior h igh , m y body w as ch an gin g an d m y h or m on es w er e f lu ct u at in g. I w as k n ow n on ly as M olly, t h e gir l w h o look ed lik e ever y ot h er 7t h an d 8t h gr ader , an d I w as con t en t . Un t il I w asn?t .

I look ed in t o t h e m ir r or on e m or n in g: It w as a scen e st r aigh t ou t of Sigou r n ey Weaver ?s Freaky Friday. I did n ot r ecogn ize m yself . Over n igh t , m y lon g, f in e, st r aigh t , an d beau t if u l dir t y blon de lock s h ad been possessed by an u n t am able beast ?br it t le, aw k w ar d, an d k n ot t y cu r ls. Had I don e som et h in g w r on g? Was I bein g pu n ish ed by t h e h air gods t h at be? I cou ld n ot bear t h e ch an ge; I w as t h e post er ch ild of self -con sciou sn ess. Tear s st r eam ed dow n m y f ace as I f or ced a br u sh t h r ou gh m y u n desir ed cu r ls t im e an d again , h opin g t h ey w ou ld disappear . I w ish ed I cou ld bu ild a t im e m ach in e an d t ak e back t h e m om en t s I h ad n ot appr eciat ed t h e m eal m y m ot h er slaved over , t h e on e w h er e I t u r n ed m y lit t le sist er aw ay w h en sh e k n ock ed on m y door t o t alk , or even t ak en m or e t im e ou t of m y day t o volu n t eer , as if r epair in g t h ese sm all act s of self ish n ess cou ld som eh ow r est or e t h e h air t h at h ad on ce in st illed m e w it h con f iden ce.

For t h e n ext f ew year s, I w alk ed t h r ou gh t h e h alls of m iddle sch ool w it h m y ch in bu r ied in t o m y ch est . Em bar r assm en t w eigh ed m e dow n . Wh en occasion ally I w ou ld glan ce u p f r om m y f ixat ed view of m y w ell-w or n Con ver se, I w as im m ediat ely f illed w it h en vy: on m y r igh t , dan gled t h e st r aigh t , f in e pon yt ails I h ad year n ed f or , w h ile on m y lef t , volu m in ou s cu r ly m an es f illed t h e h alls w it h bu oyan cy an d per son alit y. M y m ism at ch ed com bin at ion of gau n t , u n pr opor t ion al r in glet s per son if ied m y ow n pr oject ed em bar r assm en t an d cou ld ju st bar ely k eep m e af loat . I w as dr ow n in g in a sea of h air st yles I desir ed.

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Wit h m y t r an sit ion t o h igh sch ool cam e a n ew w ave of t h in k in g. M y per cept ion s of r elat ion sh ips, f r ien dsh ips, an d even m y h air began t o u n f u r l. M at u r it y open ed m y eyes t o t h e con f lict in g n at u r e of m yself : im pu lsive yet t h ou gh t f u l, m essy bu t or gan ized, an d t o t op it of f , an avid at h let e san s a gallbladder . I am a w h ir lw in d of odd com bin at ion s. Th is r ealizat ion gu ided m e t ow ar d u n der st an din g an d u n cover in g t h e t r u t h beh in d t h e com m on m iscon cept ion t h at all good t h in gs com e in pair s. Th ey don?t .

Not lon g af t er ch allen gin g t h is belief , I h ad yet an ot h er Freaky Friday m om en t ; h ow ever , n ot ph ysically, bu t m en t ally. I f ou n d m yself m or e con f iden t an d secu r e expr essin g t h e con f lict in g qu alit ies t h at m ak e m e w h o I am . I w as r eady t o be t h e cr aziest yet m ost r at ion al ver sion of m yself as I r an f or st u den t cou n cil r epr esen t at ive an d join ed t h e bask et ball t eam af t er in it ially dou bt in g m y abilit ies.

Not on ly did I exper ien ce an in t ellect u al sh if t , bu t m y per cept ion of m y h air t r an sf or m ed as w ell. M y u n even an d dispr opor t ion al cu r ls n o lon ger look ed lik e a dilapidat ed bir d?s n est in m y m in d, bu t lik e a beau t if u l m ess. It w as on ce I w as able t o em br ace t h e u n pr edict able n at u r e t h at per son if ies m y h air , t h at I w as also able t o iden t if y an d accept t h e exist en ce of t h is qu alit y in m yself . Th e dich ot om y n o lon ger def in es m e, bu t I def in e t h e dich ot om y.

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Reach in g For a M iss Joseph Levin e Th is cr eam -yellow f u r r ed, black -spot t ed M ale ch eet ah , pu r su in g h is pr ey In t h e Af r ican gr asslan ds,

Con st an t ly (f or lack of t h e abilit y To spr in t m or e t h an 30 secon ds) k eeps Abr u pt ly st oppin g t o cat ch h is br eat h .

It is as if h e is con st an t ly Ch asin g a goal t h at h e can n ot Reach n o m at t er h ow h ar d h e t r ies.

Alt h ou gh h e does n ot k n ow it , Th e pr ey w ill soon r u n ou t of st eam An d w ill st op t o cat ch it s br eat h , Givin g t h e ch eet ah a ch an ce t o cat ch t h e pr ey.

An d I, t oo, don't k n ow At w h at poin t I w ill r each m y goal Th at I h ave w or k ed so h ar d t o r each .

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Paph y Sayw al Gadi Kalm an I h ad m y u ps an d dow n s, Bu t I n ever let a sit u at ion get m e dow n .

I gr ew u p n ext t o Illin ois St at e, M y f am ily an d I r eceived lot s of h at e.

Eggs, t oilet paper , an d dead pigeon s, Illin ois St at e h at ed ou r r eligion .

M an y year s h ad gon e by, an d m y f am ily h ad qu ick ly died.

M om an d Dad becam e so ill, M y on ly sist er at e on e t oo m an y pills.

Even t h ou gh t h e w or st h ad h appen ed, I n ever gave u p u n t il t h e ver y en d.

I got m ar r ied t o t h e love of m y lif e, A close f r ien d got u s a n ice an d sh in y k n if e.

Sh pr it za an d I h ad n ot on e bu t t w o k ids, All of w h om becam e gr eat yids.

Wh en t h e k ids gr ew u p an d lef t t h e h ou se, I w on der ed w h at I can do t o be t h e cit y 's ligh t h ou se.

I w en t dow n t h e st r eet s t o give f ood t o t h e poor , An d w h en I r an ou t I got som e m or e.

People t old m e t h at I m ade people sm ile f r om all ar ou n d, An d t h at n ever w h en I w as w it h t h em did t h ey f r ow n .

M y h appy lif e en ded at t h e age of 92.

Alt h ou gh it w as n ot easy an d n ot t h e best , It cou ld h ave been a bigger m ess.

I h ad a f am ily t h at loved m e.

As w ell as gr eat f r ien ds.

Becau se of t h at I w ou ld give t h is lif e a 10.

To all t h ose w h o st ill live, Ju st r em em ber you h ave so m u ch t o give 45 .

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How t o Wat ch You r Sist er Fall in Love Alyssa Am r am i Wh en sh e f ir st t ells you sh e h as a boyf r ien d, act excit ed f or h er an d en cou r age h er t o speak abou t h im .

Tell h er t h at you ar e h appy f or h er . Tr y n ot t o ask t oo m an y qu est ion s t o en su r e t h at sh e w ill t r u st you w it h m or e in f or m at ion .

Wat ch h er aw k w ar dly dr ag h im in t o you r h ou se f or t h e f ir st t im e.

Recogn ize you r f at h er 's glar es at t h e boy, an d t h e boy ?s em bar r assed r espon ses.

Feel aban don ed w h en sh e is on a dat e an d Th e Bach elor is on t h e sam e n igh t . Kn ow t h at sh e is f allin g in love, w h ile you begin h igh sch ool an d all of it s pr essu r es.

Rem em ber w at ch in g pr in cess m ovies as a ch ild. Kn ow t h at you r sist er , t h e pr in cess, h as f ou n d h er pr in ce.

Fan t asize abou t t h e w eddin g- t h e day you r sist er w ill becom e a w if e.

Won der if you w ill f in d a pr in ce t oo.

Wat ch t h em go of f t o college separ at ely. Recogn ize h ow m u ch you r sist er m isses h im . Tell h er you m iss h er t oo, an d h im .

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Hear t h at t h ey ar e bot h m ovin g h om e an d plan t o at t en d college t oget h er in Ch icago. Feel excit ed f or t h e f am ily t o be back t oget h er .

Realize t h r ee year s h ave br eezed by. In h ale t h e sm ell of a deliciou s din n er t h at t h ey pr epar ed f or you r f am ily. Sm ile as t h e t w o of t h em pu ll in t o t h e dr ivew ay of you r dr iver s ed class, lik e par en t s com in g t o r et r ieve t h eir ch ild.

Feel jealou s t h at you r sist er is in love. Hope t h at t h er e is a boy ou t t h er e w h o w ill br in g you t h e sam e h appin ess t h at t h is boy br in gs t o you r sist er .

Qu iet ly eavesdr op on t h eir plan s f or m ar r iage in a cou ple of year s.

Im agin e t h e cen t er pieces, t h e cr eam y silk t able clot h s, an d t h e beau t if u l velvet w alk w ay cover ed in r ose pet als.

Pict u r e t h eir f u t u r e ch ildr en callin g you ?Au n t y Lyssy ? in t h eir cu t e squ eak y voices. Feel a sm ile f or m as you im agin e h oldin g a n iece or n eph ew f or t h e f ir st t im e.

Feel you r m in d r et u r n back t o r ealit y. Kn ow t h at t h e you r sist er is h appily in love, an d if you do you r job of get t in g t h r ou gh sch ool, t h en on e day you w ill be in love t oo. On e day you w ill be a pr in cess t oo.

47

47

Th e M ean in g of Pain Taliah Soleym an i

Th e u n lu ck y on es ask w h at is ?t h e m ean in g of Pain .? Not k n ow in g t h at pain is t h e blade t h at is t h ou gh t t o h ave n o en d. It is bein g lost in you r ow n h om e. It is t h e m issin g bu t t on on a per f ect ly good pair of pan t s. Pain is t h e gif t t h at h as n ot been appr eciat ed en ou gh . It is an in dicat ion of lif e, t h e m or n in g af t er a st or m . Pain is a cat alyst f or self k n ow ledge. Pain is t h e n eeded con t r ast t h at am plif ies dar k n ess an d ligh t . It is a seed of com passion . It is t h e f eelin g r igh t bef or e t h e r ealizat ion t h at t h e past m u st be lef t beh in d an d a f u t u r e ligh t m u st be f ou n d. Pain is t h e cu cu m ber as it t r an sf or m s in t o a pick le. Pain is t h e qu est ion ask ed by t h e u n lu ck y on es w h o w ill n ever k n ow w h at it m ean s t o be gu ided in t o m or e en ligh t en ed st at e of m in d.

48

48

Tim e Daph n a Czak o

Dyin g plead w it h it , Soldier s bleed w it h it , M ou r n er s scr eam at it , Scien t ist s t eam at it , Fict ion k ills it , A r u n n er dr ills it , Elder s w an t it , You n gst er s f lau n t it , Par en t s m ake it , Ch ildr en t ak e it , M in ds r ace it , Eyes f ace it , Fr ien ds give it ?

I live it .

49

49

Zaide's Teh illim Book Tova Olif f A book of Psalm s

Th at lif e is pr eciou s an d f in it e.

It s br igh t r ed cover f adin g

A pict u r e, a m em or y On e I h old on t o

Sit t in g u n m oved on m y desk .

It s sh ar p color s n ever f ade

A gif t f r om m y f at h er

Kept saf e, lam in at ed in m y br ain .

On ce belon gin g t o Zaide Zaide?s Teh illim book is a ph on e lin e For m e t o k eep h im n ear by A st r on g con n ect ion Given on t h e day h e died Bet w een t w o w h o lon g Bu t h is on ce lin ger in g sm ell h as sin ce

To k eep close

dissipat ed.

An d t o sh or t en t h e dist an ce.

M y t each er appr oach ed m e t h at dr eadf u l Fr iday

No sou n d is spok en

Pr ior t o t h e n ew s

Yet t h e m essages h ear d clear .

Seein g t h e pain in m y eyes

A con n ect ion bet w een G-d an d I

Sh e t au gh t m e a Psalm

An d Zaide?s sou l, t h e lin e.

?For you r Zaide,? sh e said.

Zaide?s Teh illim book is a t im e m ach in e, A su per pow er t h at can n ot be explain ed

I n ever got t o say it , t h ou gh .

Tr an spor t in g h is pr esen ce, h is voice

I lost Zaide t h at even in g.

His sm ile, h is h u gs On ly got h is Teh illim book in st ead.

An d t h at sw eet , gen t le k iss Zaide?s Teh illim book is Th at m y ch eek s so do m iss An alar m clock , a sir en

Teh illim book in h an d

It s pr esen ce a blar in g r em in der

An d Zaide am idst .

50

50

I Am a Beau t if u l Teen age Gir l Sar a Weiss I am a beau t if u l t een age gir l.

Wear in g even on e pr odu ct ?

M y beau t y does n ot com e f r om

If def eat an d u glin ess ar e n ot in clu ded

m y n at u r al self .

in t h at pack age,

Rat h er , it com es f r om t h e

Yes,

Pr odu ct s I ch oose.

Th at day w ill com e.

Lipst ick ,

Bu t t h e pr ice w e pay does n ot in clu de

M ascar a,

t h at .

Fou n dat ion ,

So, is per f ect ion t h e pr ice w e pay?

Blu sh ,

Or is it t h e disease t h at car r ies w it h it per f ect ion ?

Con cealer ,

Yes,

M oist u r izer ,

You r body sh ou ld sh in e t h e w ay you

An d t h e list goes on an d on .

w an t it t o, Th e ef f or t No m at t er h ow t h at is don e.

Pain Br u sh it , Sacr if ice Fix it , An d m on ey Wear it , For w h at ?

Bu t don?t f or get t o ow n it .

Beau t y.

Ow n t h at cr ow n .

Con f iden ce.

Th at is w h y you ar e beau t if u l Self -Love.

Th at is w h y Accept an ce.

I Am Will t h e day ever com e w h en I Beau t if u l.

am n ot 51

51

At Th e Cor n er of 85t h an d Am st er dam Tova Kah an Alt h ou gh it is a cold af t er n oon On t h e Upper West Side Th r ee t een age gir ls sit ou t on t h e st eps

Up on t op of t h e beige apar t m en t bu ildin g, On e h u n dr ed an d seven f eet above t h e bu sy st r eet , Is a du st y r oof t op All cold an d gr ay, bu t

Wit h ou t jack et s Fr eck led w it h t h e f oot pr in t s Dr in k in g iced cof f ee Of t h r ee t een age gir ls.

An d lau gh in g w it h t h e joy of su m m er On e gir l get s u p f r om h er spot on t h e st eps, Th e air sm ells of pollu t ion , sm ok e, an d u r in e.

Hops an d per ch es h er self on t h e ban ist er , Look s ar ou n d at t h e scen e,

It m ak es on e f eel dir t y ju st by br eat h in g.

An d t h en r ejoin s h er f r ien ds

Beh in d t h e t h r ee gir ls st an ds an eigh t -st or y bu ildin g

Not icin g f or t h e f ir st t im e

Of t w en t y-n in e lit t le apar t m en t s

On e w it h olive sk in

St ack ed above a dam p lau n dr y r oom

An d volu m in ou s black h air ,

Wit h a r ick et y old elevat or

Th e ot h er pale an d m ou sy

An d r u st y f ir e escapes.

Th e st ar k con t r ast in t h eir appear an ces

Wit h sh or t blon de lock s.

Bu t t h e con t r ast is on ly sk in -deep

All is br isk : t h e gait of m yr iad pedest r ian s passin g by,

Sh e h ear s t h em ch at t er in g on Wit h t h at sh ar ed f ier ce w it

Th eir dism issive n ods at t h e gir ls??Good af t er n oon s!?

Th e cr isp w in d pr opellin g t h em on .

Th e f r igid air sm ack s t h e gir ls in t h e f ace

Th e h u m or of each com plem en t in g t h e ot h er .

A cou ple of block s u p, St an ds a w ar m , br ow n caf e Closed f or t h e day

Ref r esh in g, it en er gizes t h em

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52

I h ave seen it over an d over , t h e sam e r iver

Af t er bein g h eld open Th ir t y m in u t es past t h e t im e

Th e sam e, st eadily f low in g past t h e cit y

Clear ly post ed on t h e glass door

Car r yin g in it s w ak e

By som e in sist en t cu st om er s-

Ch u n k s of ice

Th r ee t een age gir ls

An d cou n t less pieces of lit t er

In desper at e n eed of pan in is.

Sen din g it s sign at u r e br eeze Ou t on t o t h e cit y

In t h e lobby of t h e bu ildin g, So t h at ever yon e

Sit s a gr u m py door m an Feels it s icy br eat h on t h eir f aces

Per h aps en viou s of t h e you t h f u l joy Tast es it s bit t er , r an cid m ist .

Radiat in g f r om t h e st eps ou t side.

Soon h e w ill go ou t an d r em in d t h e gir ls As h e h as don e day af t er day,

It is lik e w h at w e im agin e k n ow ledge t o be: Cold, f ilt h y, in dif f er en t , m u r k y, an d all t oo pow er f u l

Th at t h ey ar e par t ak in g in illegal act ivit y.

Pu llin g alon g w it h it t h e w eigh t of all t h ose t h in gs

An y per son of good sen se k n ow s

Hu m an it y didn?t w an t t o deal w it h

Th at sit t in g on t h e st eps is a f ir e h azar d.

?Bew ar e,? t h ey say, ?it s ef f ect s ar e cr ipplin g?

Fr om t h eir spot on t h e st eps,

So ever yon e h ast en s past t h e m on st er ,

Th e gir ls can see past t h e bu st lin g st r eet

Fleein g it s cor r u pt ive pow er s, Pu llin g t h eir coat s closer t o t h eir ch est s

Filled w it h n oisy car s Bu t t h r ee t een age gir ls

Dow n t o t h e icy gr ay

Sit ou t on t h e st eps

St ill w at er s 53

53

How t o Lobby You r Repr esen t at ive Rebeca Pr ice Wh en you t r avel t o DC as a f r esh m an , adm ir e t h e w h it e Su pr em e Cou r t bu ildin g. Fall in love w it h t h e Wh it e Hou se an d im agin e in t er n in g on t h e Hill an d w or k in g as a polit ical advisor or cam paign m an ager . Realize t h at you ar e passion at e abou t polit ics an d w an t t o st ay in volved. Volu n t eer f or Tam m y Du ck w or t h?s cam paign w h en you get h om e.

Wh en you ar e a soph om or e an d you r h ist or y t each er ask s if you w an t t o go on AIPAC?s college su m m it Saban , say yes excit edly. List en t o t h e dif f er en t speak er s on t h e su m m it an d t ak e f r en zied n ot es on Ir an an d t h e M iddle East . Lear n h ow t o lobby an d h ow t o en gage n ew act ivist s f or a cau se. Won der if you w ill be able t o su ccessf u lly advocat e f or Isr ael on you r ow n .

Du r in g you r ju n ior year of h igh sch ool, sign u p t o go on AIPAC?s h igh sch ool su m m it .

Realize t h at you w ill be lobbyin g w it h a st af f m em ber on t h e h ill as you f ill ou t t h e lon g applicat ion .

Won der if Jan Sch ak ow sk y w ill t ak e you ser iou sly an d pr ess t h e su bm it bu t t on .

Feel n er vou s abou t w h o you w ill r oom w it h . In h ale an d r em in d you r self all of t h e gir ls goin g on h igh sch ool su m m it ar e good, in t elligen t people.

Wak e u p ear ly on Su n day an d ch eck t h at you pack ed ever yt h in g you n eed. Look at t h e seat in g ch ar t an d h ope t h e f ligh t isn?t delayed. Kn ow t h er e is n ot h in g you can do if it is.

Feel bu t t er f lies in you r st om ach an d w eigh t s in you r ch est w h en you go t h r ou gh secu r it y. Un der st an d t h er e is n ot h in g in you r bag t h at w ou ld get you in t r ou ble, bu t st ill f eel n er vou s.

List en in t en t ly du r in g t h e f ir st session abou t t ellin g you r Isr ael st or y, pr esen t ed by t h e n at ion al f ield or gan izer Car ly Hook er , w h om you f ir st m et over t h e su m m er on Saban . See if sh e r em em ber s you .

54

54

Wak e u p at six on M on day m or n in g so you m ak e it t o daven in g on t im e. Cr y w h en you pu t you r con t act len ses in t o you r dr y, blear y eyes. Tr y t o get dr essed as qu ick ly as possible. Spen d t oo m u ch t im e decidin g bet w een w ear in g you r r ed sk ir t an d black sw eat er or gr ey sk ir t an d blu e sh ir t . St ay in you r r oom f or t oo lon g an d r egr et n ot decidin g w h at you w ou ld w ear bef or e leavin g.

Spen d t h e lon g day lear n in g abou t t h e M iddle East an d secu r it y issu es r egar din g Isr ael. Feel lik e you r h an d w eigh s h u n dr eds of pou n ds af t er a lon g day of t ak in g n ot es.

Volu n t eer t o speak abou t Ham as w h en you r sch ool m eet s t o t alk abou t lobbyin g Jan Sch ak ow sk y. Pr act ice w h at you plan on sayin g over an d over again .

Wak e u p Tu esday m or n in g f illed w it h n er ves. Qu ick ly eat you r w ay t h r ou gh t h e br eak f ast bu f f et . List en t o t h e last speak er of t h e su m m it an sw er qu est ion s abou t lobbyin g.

Tak e pict u r es w it h t h e gr ou p on Capit ol Hill. Rem in d you r self w h at you plan on sayin g as you w alk t ow ar ds Jan Sch ak ow sk y ?s of f ice.

Collect you r t h ou gh t s as t h e people goin g bef or e you speak . Tell M s.

Sch ak ow sk y ?s Ch ief -of -St af f , Cat h y Hu r w it , abou t t h e secu r it y t h r eat s Ham as?s pr esen ce in Gaza pr esen t s Isr ael. List en r espect f u lly as sh e t alk s t o t h e gr ou p abou t Pit t sbu r gh an d ask h er abou t bipar t isan sh ip. Feel pr ou d w h en sh e says sh e lik ed m y com m en t s af t er t h e m eet in g.

Af t er you leave t h e bu ildin g t h in k of dif f er en t w ays t o con t in u e t h e r elat ion sh ip Ida Cr ow n bu ilt w it h M s. Hu r w it . Ask t h e ot h er people w h o cam e w it h you if t h ey ar e in t er est ed in f or m in g a lobby gr ou p at t h e sch ool. Em ail M s. Hu r w it an d t h an k h er f or h er t im e.

Kn ow t h at lobbyin g an d advocat in g f or a cau se you believe in is an on goin g pr ocess. Kn ow t h at if you do n ot en su r e a con t in u ed r elat ion sh ip w it h M s.

Hu r w it , n o on e else w ill. Tak e in it iat ive an d lead t h e ot h er Ida Cr ow n advocat es in pr ot ect in g t h e U.S.-Isr ael r elat ion sh ip.

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55

Th e M ou se Get s Th e Ch eese Sar ah Sh in er

Th e t im id m ou se Hides in h er h om e Too af r aid t o go ou t an d r oam .

Sh e r u bs h er paw s an d t w it ch es h er w h isk er s, Bu t st ays qu iet as a w h isper .

Th e m ou se is an xiou s Sh e w ags h er t ail Won?t leave h er h ou se As if sh e?s in jail.

To br eak ou t you M u st t h in k you h ave t h e k eys.

Th en , you can go ou t an d claim you r ch eese.

56

56

Th e Flow er Sim on e M iller Walk in g alon g a qu iet san dy r oad on a w ar m su m m er m or n in g, St ar in g in t o t h e en dless lan dscape of gr avel, san d, t r ees an d bu sh es again st t h e br igh t blu e sk y, Next t o m e on a bu sh I saw a br igh t r ed f low er , it s delicat e pet als f lu t t er in g in t h e br eeze.

I w as f ou r t een .

Th e f low er w as a deep scar let color , Wit h pet als ar r an ged in a syst em at ic an d m at h em at ical pat t er n ar ou n d t h e cen t er .

Th e pet als w er e as sof t as silk , Th e cor e yellow , dr ippin g w it h pollen ; as if in vit in g bees.

Th e f low er w as dr oopin g, an d ever y t im e som e w in d blew , it w ou ld f lu t t er an d sh iver lik e a vu ln er able per son .

I w as f ou r t een .

I cou ld plu ck t h e f low er ?s delicat e st em so easily.

I cou ld w ear t h e f low er in m y h air an d sh ow it of f , Br in g it h om e t o m y m om t o su r pr ise h er an d sh ow t h at I car e.

I cou ld place t h e f low er u n der h eavy book s an d pr eser ve it s beau t y f or all et er n it y, Or I cou ld pu t t h e f low er in t o a cr yst al vase an d br igh t en u p m y h om e.

Gu est s w ou ld visit an d adm ir e t h e f low er , it s r ed pet als again st t h e w h it e m ar ble of m y k it ch en .

I w as f ou r t een .

Bu t if I pick ed it , Th e scar let pet als w ou ld w ilt an d f ade t o a br ow n , Th e delicat e pet als w ou ld t u r n cr u n ch y an d cr u m ble f r om t h e vase on t h e m ar ble cou n t er in t o du st .

Th e beau t y w ou ld f ade an d even t u ally disappear as t h e f low er w as t ak en ou t w it h t h e gar bage on Th u r sdays.

I w alk ed aw ay f r om t h e scar let f low er , f ou r t een .

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57

Dau gh t er Bayla Alt er

M ak e you r bed ever y m or n in g; St r ip you r sh eet s on Fr idays; Don?t bu y an y m or e clot h es, you don?t n eed t h em ; Th er e ar e ch ildr en st ar vin g in Af r ica you k n ow ; Don?t w ear t h at dr ess, it ?s t oo sh or t ; Don?t w ear t h at on e eit h er , it ?s t oo low cu t ; You k n ow w h at , w ear w h at ever you w an t I don?t car e; Go do you r h om ew or k , st op pr ocr ast in at in g; Com e w at ch Survivor w it h m e, w e?r e lik e f ive episodes beh in d an d I don?t w an t t o acciden t ally see a spoiler on Tw it t er ; St u dy h ar der , you r t each er t old m e t h at you ?r e r u sh in g t h r ou gh you r t est s; bu t I am t r yin g, I am st u dyin g h ar d; Well, t h e t each er k n ow s best ; Th is is h ow t o bak e t h e per f ect ch ocolat e ch ip cook ies; Wow , you ?r e r eally get t in g t h e h an g of it you ?r e alm ost as good as you r sist er ; Th is is h ow t o su cceed in sch ool; Oh , you got an A on t h is? You r sist er got an A+; Th is is h ow t o be r espect f u l of you r elder s (r egar dless of t h e r espect t h ey sh ow you in r et u r n ); Th is is h ow t o en joy spen din g t im e w it h you r f am ily, even if t h ey r eally pu sh ever y sin gle on e of you r bu t t on s; Th is is h ow t o pr epar e a pr oper salad f or shabbas lu n ch ; Th is is h ow t o set t h e t able, f or k s on t h e lef t , k n ives on t h e r igh t ; No, you ?r e doin g it w r on g; Ju st get ou t of m y w ay, let m e do it ; Th is is h ow t o sh ow h ow m u ch you car e t o t h e people you car e abou t ; Th is is h ow t o set a w ash in g m ach in e; Wh at do you m ean you f or got f r om t h e last t im e I t au gh t you ; Ju st get ou t of m y w ay, let m e do it ; Th is is h ow t o bak e an d br aid ch allah ; Th is is h ow t o w alk w it h con f iden ce; Th is is h ow t o n ot su ccu m b t o peer pr essu r e; Th is is h ow t o be a u n iqu e in dividu al; Th is is h ow t o ch oose good f r ien ds; Wait , I don?t lik e h er , don?t h an g ou t w it h h er ; He?s sk et ch y, st ay aw ay f r om h im ; Oh , r em em ber t h at gir l you h aven?t spok en t o in year s? You sh ou ld call h er u p again ; Th is is h ow t o be an au n t at n in e year s old; Th is is h ow t o be a m aid of h on or at sixt een ; Th is is h ow t o be t h er e f or people w h en t h ey n eed a sh ou lder t o cr y on ; Th is is h ow t o su bt ly br eak u p w it h a f r ien d; Th is is h ow t o n ot so su bt ly br eak u p w it h a boy; Rem em ber t o st ick ban daids on you r an k les bef or e pu t t in g on you r h eels; Her e?s h ow t o st yle you r bu sh y, cu r ly h air so it doesn?t look lik e a r at ?s n est each m or n in g; Don?t sit cr iss cr oss on t h e f loor , it m ak es you look im m at u r e; Her e?s h ow t o h an dle people w h o m ak e you so an gr y you ju st w an t t o pu n ch t h em in t h e f ace; Her e?s h ow t o h old back you r t ear s w h en you ?r e in pu blic an d you don?t w an t t h em t o see you cr y; Her e?s h ow t o be sassy in a passive w ay; Her e?s h ow t o be sassy in a n ot -so-passive w ay; Rem em ber t o st ay r espect f u l; Sass w ill be in t er pr et ed as abr asive if you don?t m ain t ain a cer t ain level of r espect an d level-h eadedn ess; St an d you r gr ou n d; Even if t h e w h ole w or ld is t ellin g you t o m ove, it is you r du t y t o plan t you r self lik e a t r ee an d say ?n o, you m ove?; Be passion at e; Let you r passion sh in e t h r ou gh in you r h ar d w or k ; Bu t w h at if I?m n ot passion at e abou t an yt h in g?; you m ean t o t ell m e t h at af t er all t h at I?ve t au gh t you you ?r e n ot goin g t o h ave an y passion in you ?

58

58

An Ode t o Sn ow Rebecca Qu in t as Th e w or ld, Tr an sf or m s f r om r ed, or an ge, yellow , an d br ow n

Bef or e you go ou t side, You pu t on all you w ar m layer s

To a blin din g w h it e.

Of coat s, scar ves, h at s, an d m it t en s.

Th e gr ou n d,

Wh en you st ep ou t side in t o t h e br igh t er w or ld

cover ed in a spar k lin g blan k et

You f eel t h e cr isp, cold w in d k iss you r f ace,

Look s alm ost m agical.

Redden in g you r ch eek s as you w alk t h r ou gh

Th e t r ees,

Wh at seem s t o be an en t ir ely n ew w or ld.

Look as if a gian t h as piped van illa f r ost in g On t o each of it s br an ch es.

Th e r oof t ops,

You t ak e som e sof t , cold, glit t er in g sn ow in t o you r h an d

All h ave per f ect ly u n t ou ch ed w h it e icin g t oppin g t h em of f ,

An d t r an sf or m it in t o a globe.

Oh h ow I love t h e Sn ow !

Wit h icicles h an gin g dow n f or decor at ion .

Th e ligh t glist en s of f t h e sn ow , m ak in g t h e w or ld h ar d t o look at .

Th er e is som et h in g m agical In w alk in g back in side

Th er e is som et h in g beau t if u l

Fr om t h e br illian t cold an d f eelin g t h e h eat .

In t h e f ields of sn ow t h at ar e u n t ou ch ed.

You ar e st ill able t o w at ch lon gin gly

Oh h ow I love t h e Sn ow !

Th r ou gh t h e w in dow At t h e n ew ly m in t ed w or ld

Th er e is som et h in g m agical

Th at is laid bef or e you .

Abou t w at ch in g each sn ow f lak e

Cu r l u p in a com f y ch air

Fall silen t ly t o gr ou n d.

Wit h h ot ch ocolat e in on e h an d an d a book in t h e ot h er

Sn ow f all, Look s lik e a m ovie scen e

An d w at ch t h e sn ow

Wh en you look u p

Fall dow n on t o t h e gr ou n d,

An d see t h e m illion s of lit t le sn ow f lak es

Tr an sf or m in g t h e lan d on ce m or e

Fallin g on t op of you .

In t o a glor iou s k in gdom

Fr om f ar aw ay t h ey all look lik e t h e sam e dot s,

Th at illu m in at es t h e w or ld.

Bu t if you look closer you can see each sn ow f lak e?s u n iqu e sh ape.

Oh h ow I love t h e Sn ow !

G-d cr eat es each sn ow f lak e Dif f er en t t h an ever y ot h er on e on e.

Oh h ow I love t h e Sn ow !

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M y Dad Tam ar Ch avel I sit in a 2010 Toyot a Sien n a Le locat ed in a m ovin g com pan y ?s em pt y par k in g lot .

Havin g ju st m oved in t o t h e dr iver ?s seat I bu ck le u p an d look t o m y r igh t , w h er e m y f at h er sit s in t h e passen ger seat . He is sm ilin g. As alw ays. Above t h e cr eases of h is sm ile ar e cr in k les n ext t o h is eyes--sign if yin g t h at h is excit em en t an d pr ide in m e ar e gen u in e. Con sist en t w it h h is gen er al w eek en d st yle, m y f at h er is w ear in g ligh t blu e jean s, a sw eat er w it h pat ch es on t h e elbow s (ch an n elin g h is ?pr of essor st yle?), an d h is t r u st y deep r oyal blu e sn eak er s w it h w h it e laces. Th e color s br in g ou t h is ligh t blu e eyes. Ir on ically, h e is bald w it h a sh or t bear d. In addit ion t o all of t h ese t h in gs m y f at h er is on e of m y f avor it e people in t h e w or ld. He alw ays k n ow s w h at t o say an d h ow t o act , balan cin g ser iou sn ess w it h com edy an d joy. He is in t elligen t an d st r aigh t f or w ar d, bu t is alw ays com f or t in g. ?Ok ay, ar e you r eady t o r ev h er u p?? M y Dad ask s, ?You r seat belt is on ? You adju st ed you r m ir r or s? Rear view an d side view m ir r or s? Rem em ber t h is is a t h ou san ds-of -pou n ds k illin g m ach in e. Wh en you dr ive you dr ive r espon sibly.? " Yeah I k n ow ? I w ave h im of f .

Secr et ly, t h ou gh , I am t er r if ied. M y palm s ar e slow ly bein g cover ed w it h sm all beads of sw eat . M y body is st if f an d I k eep m y eyes f u lly open , at t en t ive. Th is is m y f ir st t im e dr ivin g a car ! As I am abou t t o pu t t h e car in t o dr ive m y dad places h is h an d on m in e, locat ed on t h e gear sh if t . He st ops m e bef or e I can st ar t dr ivin g. ?Ar e you su r e you ?r e ok ay, Tam ar ? You ?r e u su ally m u ch m or e t alk at ive t h an t h is.? ?Daddy, ser iou sly I?m f in e.? ?Tam ar , ser iou sly.?

His expr ession im it at es a gir l in h er pr et een year s, m ak in g m e lau gh . ?I?m ju st a lit t le n er vou s. Th at ?s all. I m ean Revit al an d Ayelet ar e bot h r eally good dr iver s an d t h ey h aven?t cr ash ed. So w h at if I cr ash ? I?m alw ays t oo n er vou s t o dr ive go-car t s. Wh en ever I am at a place t h at h as I ju st go in t h e car t w it h som eon e else an d let t h em dr ive. I?m lit er ally goin g f r om zer o t o 100. Fr om dr ivin g lit er ally n ot h in g t o a h u ge f ou r t on car , lik e you said.?

I spill t h e t h ou gh t s r u n n in g t h r ou gh m y h ead. As u su al m y dad can t ell w h en I am u pset . As u su al h e k n ow s h ow t o get m e t o t ell h im w h at ?s w r on g. An d as u su al h e w ill also k n ow ju st w h at t o say.

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?Tam ar w e ar e in a par k in g lot . Th er e is n ot h in g f or you t o h it . I k n ow t ellin g you ever yt h in g w ill be f in e is n ot h elpf u l, so I?m t ellin g you t h er e is n o w ay n ot f or it t o be f in e. All you ar e goin g t o do is dr ive in cir cles. Th e par k in g lot is lar ge en ou gh t h at if you lose con t r ol or go of f t h e pat h w e ar e t ak in g a lit t le bit t h er e is n ot h in g f or you t o cr ash in t o. Also w h o car es abou t Revit al an d Ayelet ? You ar e you r ow n per son . An d if you m u st com par e you r self t o t h em , you m easu r e u p in ever y w ay. So ?ch ill ou t ?as t h e k ids say t h ese days an d let ?s get goin g.?

As h e is speak in g m y br eat h in g slow s an d I becom e m or e con f iden t . I m ove t h e gear sh if t an d t h e car does n ot m ove. ?Oh m y god Daddy I br ok e t h e car . It ?s n ot m ovin g. Wh at do I do!?? I st ar t yellin g f r an t ically at m y dad. ?Tam ar . You r f oot is on t h e br eak ,? m y Dad t ells m e, r aisin g h is eyebr ow s.

I let ou t a n er vou s lau gh an d let u p m y f oot f r om t h e br eak . Th e m in ivan st ar t s t o r oll an d I slow ly r egain m y con f iden ce. To calm m e dow n m y dad st ar t s t o t alk t o m e abou t ot h er su bject s lik e m y sch oolw or k , h is job, w h at w e ar e doin g f or t h e h olidays, an d f am ily. In t h e m ean t im e I dr ive in abou t 100 cir cles an d f igu r e 8s. Su dden ly I r ealize w h at I?ve don e. ?Oh m y god Daddy I?m dr ivin g.? ?Yeah an d pr et t y f ast . Slow dow n a lit t le.?

Af t er a f ew m or e r ou n ds t h r ou gh t h e par k in g lot I slow dow n an d t h e car r olls t o a st op. I pu t t h e car in t o par k an d let ou t a br eat h I did n ot k n ow I w as h oldin g in . M y dad lau gh s. He says ?I?m r eally pr ou d of you . You w en t zer o t o 100.?

Lik e in t h is m om en t , m y dad is alw ays m y r ock . Ever yday w h en h e get s h om e f r om w or k I get a com f or t in g h u g an d t h e sam e f ir st qu est ion --h ow w as m y day at sch ool? He does n ot u se t h is qu est ion as a gr eet in g bu t h e r eally m ean s it , alw ays pu sh in g t o k n ow m or e if I do n ot give a f u ll en ou gh r espon se. Now , bef or e h e can even ask , as soon as m y f at h er w alk s in t h e door I spill all of m y f eelin gs on h im : w h ich classes I en joyed, w h ich t each er s f r u st r at ed m e, an d an y n ew even t s an d developm en t s in m y lif e. Ever y t im e I speak m y f at h er sit s back an d allow s m e t o let it all ou t . He list en s. Becau se of h is u n der st an din g eyes an d per f ect ly placed ?yeah?s an d qu est ion s, I k n ow t h e valu e of list en in g. I k n ow t h e w ay I f eel w h en m y f at h er list en s an d I n ow t r y t o m im ic t h at w h en list en in g t o m y f r ien ds an d f am ily.

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How To Say Goodbye To You r Br ot h er Pelah Coh en Wh en h e r em in ds you t h at h e's leavin g in a w eek sw allow t h e lu m p in you r t h r oat t ellin g you t h e day you h ave been dr eadin g f or m on t h s is com in g t oo soon .

Tell h im you ar e excit ed f or h im an d t h e am azin g t r ips h e w ill exper ien ce. Tr y n ot t o say you w ill m iss h im t oo m u ch .

List en t o h im gu sh abou t h is plan s f or a f u t u r e aw ay f r om h om e. Tak e advan t age of t h e t im e you h ave lef t w it h you r older br ot h er .

Wat ch t h e w or r y in you r par en t s f aces w h en t h ey t h in k abou t t h eir f ir st ch ild leavin g h om e an d goin g in t o t h e w or ld on h is ow n .

Feel you r h ear t m elt w h en h e t ells you h e is goin g t o m iss you .

Rem em ber all t h e t im es h e w as t h er e w h en you n eeded h im .

Realize t h at soon you w ill be in h is place, r eady t o go of f on you r ow n . File aw ay t h e f eelin gs you h ave n ow so you k n ow w h at you r siblin gs w ill also go t h r ou gh . Hope t h ey w ill f eel t h e sam e w ay. For give an yt h in g h e h as don e in t h e past t o an n oy you becau se h e w on?t be t h er e lat er t o f or give.

Tell h im you ar e goin g t o w ak e u p ear ly t o say goodbye.

Wat ch h im t r y n ot t o t ear u p as you say you w ill m iss h im .

Wat ch h im bit e h is lip t r em blin g in sadn ess w h en you t ell h im you h ope h e h as t h e best year of h is lif e.

Hold you r oldest br ot h er f or t h e last t im e u n t il t h e n ext t im e h e com es h om e t o visit w h ich m igh t be n ext year .

Hear h im say, ?Th an k s an d I w ill m iss you gu ys. Be good an d I w ill see you soon .? Feel com f or t ed by h is w or ds.

Wh en you ?r e h avin g a bad day, Wh at sApp you r br ot h er an d list en t o h is w ise voice t ellin g you h ow h e?s been in t h e sam e sit u at ion .

Pu ll you r self t oget h er an d t ak e deep br eat h s. Lie dow n an d t alk abou t it w it h h im an d r em em ber t h at h e w ill alw ays be t h er e t o h elp.

Hope you ?r e n ot t ak in g t im e aw ay f r om h is excit in g day. Tak e h is advice so h e?s n ot w ast in g h is t im e f or n o r eason .

Feel com f or t ed by sit t in g in h is r oom . Ru b t h e sw eat sh ir t h e gave you bef or e h e lef t in bet w een you r f in ger s. Sm ell t h e cologn e bot t le on t h e desk h e w ou ld do h is h om ew or k at .

Realize it sm ells lik e you r br ot h er you m iss so m u ch . In h ale t h e st r on g sm ell. Br eat h in t h e absen ce of you r f avor it e siblin g h opin g h is vision s f or t h e year ar e w or k in g ou t f or h im .

Give you r br ot h er a ?t h an k you ?w h en h e is don e givin g advice.

Blow h im a k iss bef or e you h an g u p.

Go in t o you r r oom an d dr ess in t o pajam as t h at k eep you w ar m at n igh t . Fall asleep in t h e com f or t of you r bed w r apped ar ou n d you lik e t h e com f or t of h is pr esen ce.

An d n ow h e f eels t h e sam e w ay, t oo.

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Fr ien d Fr om t h e Past Taliah Soleym an i To a f r ien d f r om t h e past , Isn't w eir d f or m e t o call you t h at ? I alw ays believed you w ou ld be w it h m e t h r ou gh it all, even w alk in g dow n at m y w eddin g day. Bu t f or w h at ? For t h e w ay you disgu ise you r self t h r ou gh ou r sw eet m em or ies of dan ce par t ies, beach days, sn ow day sleepover s. For t h e w ay you allow ed t h ese m em or ies t o h old pow er over m e. For cin g m e t o f or get t h e w ay you m ade m e f eel: Fat , St u pid, Tim id.

It m u st h ave been Sept em ber of 2011, a day t h at w ou ld m ar k m y m et am or ph osis. I w as sh or t , m y ch eek s w er e t h e size of t w o w at er balloon s w ait in g t o be popped. You w er e t all, br oad sh ou lder s? an aggr essive bu ild. Ou r f ou r t h -gr ade selves w er e playin g w all ball as w e did on t h e black t op. Joy an d sm iles f illed ou r f aces u n t il I h ad w on t h e gam e. You becam e f u r iou s?as I con t in u ed t o explain h ow I h ad w on f air ly. You t h en placed you r h eavy h an ds on m y w eak sh ou lder s. Yellin g an d yellin g an d yellin g. At t h at m om en t I h ad decided I w as goin g t o speak u p. " No, you can n ot speak t o m e lik e t h at ."

Nin e w or ds?n in e w or ds t h at w ou ld ch an ge m e f or ever .

Fr om t h at m om en t I t old m yself I can n o lon ger allow you t o con t r ol m e. I m u st speak m y m in d. I began t o becom e an advocat e f or m yself an d t h en f or ot h er s.

For year s I h at ed you . I w an t ed you t o f eel as low as I f elt . Bu t , n ow I can t r u ly say t h at I am gr at ef u l f or you an d t h e pain you m ade m e go t h r ou gh . As you k n ock ed m e dow n , I began t o r ebu ild m yself . Bu t , n ot as m y or igin al st r u ct u r e. Bu t , as a st r on ger m or e su bst an t ial bein g. So, f or t h at I am f or ever in debt ed t o you .

Best w ish es, You r cu r r en t f r ien d

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Vict or y Wit h ou t a Win Tova Olif f I am enclosed by walls colorfully painted with calming hues of pink, green, and blue. The detailed walls encompass the youthful room with with their fairies, flowers, and trees. I am seven years old, and I sit alone in my bedroom. An array of scattered dolls and their miniature accessories consumes the carpet around me. From my bedroom window I can hear the playful shrieks and joyful laughs of my two brothers playing basketball outside. The faint thud of the ball hitting the ground coincides with my heartbeat; with each passing minute it becomes faster and grows louder. Suddenly, the air occupying my messy room becomes thick. I am unsure if this is a result of the collected dust on my dolls or the lump in my throat that I desperately try to ignore. I concentrate on my breathing: In. Out. In. Out. I long to be outside playing basketball with my brothers. I want nothing more than to inhale the fresh cool air of the morning and create memories with my brothers. I yearn to be with them laughing uncontrollably instead of fighting my urge to cry. I could easily stand up, run down the stairs, and open my heavy front door leading to the basketball hoop in my front yard. Physically, there is nothing stopping me from doing so. It is merely the words of my younger brother that confines me to my room. His words echo in my ear fueling my hurt, my anger, and my burning desire to prove him wrong, but all I can think of are his insulting words: ? No, you can?t play basketball with us! Go play dolls in your room or something. I?m sorry, but you - a girl - couldn?t possibly play at our level. We want to play real basketball not girl basketball.? It was those last three words that I could not seem to let go.

Then, without warning, the hurt disappeared, and I was left with just one emotion: aspiration. I had become filled with the aspiration to prove my brothers wrong and show them that I, a girl- and a proud one at that- could play with them at their level. I felt the need to defend myself and all girls from the misconception that girls are worse than boys at sports simply because they are girls.

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With this rush of ambition, I ran to the hallway crushing the little dolls beneath my feet. I scurried down the hall and skipped down the stairs. In an instant, I put on my basketball shoes and burst through the door. Instantly, a powerful rush of cold wind stung my face. On any other day this might have bothered me, but not today. In fact, the cool air felt like a relief. Its sting incomparable to the sting of my brother ?s remarks. I saw my brothers and tried to make my short scrawny composition look intimidating. I wanted to be seen. I spoke firmly; in as grown up a voice as I could muster, I said ?Let me play with you guys! Yes, I am a girl and I can still play at your level! Girls can play basketball too.? With extra sass, I added: ?In fact, I bet I can beat you two!? A smile crept onto my face the second my brother responded: ?You?re right! What are we playing - Horse or Bubble?? We played outside together until the cold made our fingers turn numb, and we could no longer grasp the ball. I didn?t win the game we played, but somehow I left with a feeling of victory. I think I understood that I had indeed won, and in a much more important way.

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An Ode t o Bam m a Ru by Gr an t Sit t in g at t h e glass k it ch en t able, t ea f illed w it h su gar an d h on ey M y gr an dm a an d I. We ar e r eadin g The Sun and Her Flowers by Ru pi Kau r , an d w e com e acr oss a page t h at w r it es: ?We h ave been dyin g sin ce w e got h er e an d f or got t o en joy t h e view.?

Bam m a lau n ch es in t o a st or y: Sh e is lear n in g h ow t o play golf f or t h e f ir st t im e w it h m y gr an dpa, an d t h e golf pr o f ir st t ak es t h e t w o of t h em ou t t o see t h e cou r se. He explain s t h at t h e gr ass is gr een , t h e sk y is blu e, an d t h at t h is is w h at w ill be su r r ou n din g t h em w h en t h ey play. Th is w ill be t h e view.

I sit t h er e in aw e of t h e w om an in f r on t of m e w it h m iles m or e of exper ien ce.

I r ealize t h at I h ave n ot t r u ly appr eciat ed an d t ak en advan t age of t h e lif e sh e h as t o sh ar e w it h m e An d t h e m iles sh e is so w illin g t o h elp m e r u n .

In t h e m in u t e sh e spen ds sh ar in g h er st or y, a m illion m om en t s f lash in t o m y m in d: Th e t im e t h at sh e w as t h e on ly em er gen cy con t act w h o an sw er ed t h e ph on e w h en I cam e dow n w it h t h e f lu at sch ool. An d w h en sh e k n ew t h at all I n eeded w as a cou ch an d som e ch ick en sou p.

All of t h e t im es t h at sh e slaved in t h e k it ch en f or h ou r s pr epar in g ou r Su n day br u n ch , Or t ook t h e ext r a dr ive t o bu y u s t h e k osh er f ood t h at ou r cou sin s do n ot car e t o ch oose.

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Th ose ar e in t er r u pt ed by t h e im age of h er f ear lessly an d pat ien t ly t ak in g on t h e dif f icu lt t ask of t each in g a t en year old h ow t o play M ah Jon gg.

Th e glow in g pr ide on h er f ace w h en I f in ally beat h er f ive year s lat er .

I see h er sleepin g peacef u lly in h er t u r qu oise sat in r obe.

A book sit s on h er ch est , A sof t sn or e escapes f r om h er lips.

M y par en t s ar e aw ay f or t h eir an n iver sar y an d I can n ot h an dle it , So sh e cam e t o h an dle m e.

I f eel lik e t h e best t h in g sin ce h er homemade sliced br ead Wh en sh e excit edly in t r odu ces m e t o h er f r ien ds.

I h ope sh e is br aggin g.

I h ear h er voice t ellin g m e abou t t h e Jan e Au st en book clu b sh e is n er vou s t o lead at h er r et ir em en t h om e.

I k n ow f or a f act t h at it w ill be am azin g, I h ope f or t h at sam e cou r age.

I live f or h er h om e videos.

I appr eciat e t h e t im e w h en sh e t old m e t o pu t m y ph on e aw ay at t h e t able, An d I r em em ber it ever y t im e I h ave t h e u r ge t o ch eck m y m essages.

I n eed t o give h er t h e u n divided at t en t ion t h at sh e alw ays gives m e.

I love t h e w ay sh e pr aises m y m ot h er ever y t im e sh e com es t o ou r h ou se, t h an k s G-d t h at sh e join ed h er f am ily.

I pr ay t o on e day h ear t h e sam e f r om m y ow n m ot h er -in -law , To f eel w elcom ed.

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Fin ally, I see h er st an din g w it h h er iph on e t ilt ed sidew ays, Her h an d on t h e cam er a bu t t on .

I st an d in a h u ddle w it h m y br ot h er , sist er , an d six cou sin s.

Sh e is beam in g w it h joy f r om look in g at t h e gr ou p of you n gst er s t h at sh e h as cr eat ed.

Sh e m ak es su r e w e k n ow t h at w e ar e h er gr eat est accom plish m en t .

Sit t in g w it h h er at t h e glass k it ch en t able, I f eel beyon d r eassu r ed t h at sh e appr oves of t h e w r it in g t h at I love.

Her opin ion m ean s t h e w or ld t o m e.

We ar e sit t in g t h er e.

It is 10:30 at n igh t on a Fr iday.

Th e t able h as been clear ed by m y st u bbor n , r ef u sin g t o sit dow n gr an dm a.

M y br ot h er an d m y m om ar e playin g a car d gam e in t h e ot h er r oom .

M y dad is sn or in g on t h e cou ch .

M y pu ppies ar e scaven gin g f or dr opped pieces of f ood.

M y 88 year old gr an dm a in h er gr ey sw eat er w it h a gold an d black scar f h an gin g f r om h er n eck . Her per f ect ly f lu f f y w h it e h air an d h er eyes f ocu sed on m e an d on ly m e.

So, w e m ay h ave been dyin g sin ce w e got h er e, Bu t r igh t n ow I am n ot on ly en joyin g t h e view , I h ave n ever seen a bet t er on e.

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Sixt een Sar ah Sh in er In m y r oom w h en I w as a baby t h er e laid a pu r ple an d w h it e blan k et .

Th e yar n design r esem bles m y siblin g?s baby blan k et s bu t it w as m ade by a dif f er en t per son . I w as n ot sixt een .

I t r easu r e t h e blan k et ?s com f or t .

Given t o m e as a legacy of m y gr eat - gr an dm ot h er w h o cr och et ed on e f or each of h er gr eat - gr an dch ildr en .

M in e w ou ld h ave been t h e last . I am sixt een .

M aybe I w ill cook am azin g f ood lik e h er .

M aybe I w ill be in depen den t lik e h er .

M aybe I w ill I be br ave lik e h er .

M aybe I w ill be loved lik e h er . I am sixt een .

M y gr eat - gr an dm ot h er passed aw ay t w o h ou r s bef or e I w as bor n .

I am n am ed f or h er .

I am sixt een t oday an d sh e passed aw ay sixt een year s ago.

I st an d h er e, sixt een .

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Gir l Or iya Falk Su m m er of sn eak ily applied m ascar a sm u dged ben eat h you r eyes, clot h es st olen f r om m y closet , an d t h e sh ow s t h at you r eally sh ou ldn?t be w at ch in g on Net f lix. Su dden ly, I am aw ar e of h ow f ast you ar e gr ow in g u p, an d h ow f ast you w ish you w er e gr ow in g u p. It seem s t h at you h ave st ar t ed t o pay at t en t ion t o m e, look in g t o m y w or ds an d act ion s f or gu idan ce. M aybe it s alw ays been t h is w ay. Do you r em em ber t h at sn ow y n igh t in Decem ber abou t eleven year s ago? I f elt Im m a?s h u ge, r ou n d st om ach an d declar ed t h at I w as r eady t o h ave an ot h er siblin g? even t h en you m u st h ave been list en in g t o m e, becau se you w er e bor n t h at ver y n igh t .

Did I ever t ell you h ow f u n n y it is w at ch in g you squ ir m w h en t h e w or d pu ber t y is m en t ion ed, as on ly a ch ild aw ait in g ch an ge can ? Tr y n ot t o gr ow u p t oo f ast ? You ar e goin g t o m iss bein g able pu sh of f sh ow er in g ju st on e m or e n igh t , yet con sist en t ly h avin g per f ect , bou n cy cu r ls; you ar e goin g t o m iss t h e por celain , por eless sk in of ch ildh ood; you ar e goin g m iss you r n aive opt im ism t h at w ill in evit ably be st olen by a cold an d u n f air w or ld; you ar e goin g t o m iss t h e dr u dger y of h avin g t r u ly n ot h in g t o do. I cou ld go on , bu t I don?t w an t t o scar e you t oo badly sin ce t h er e is n o Pet er Pan , n o Never lan d, an d som eday even lost ch ildr en h ave t o gr ow u p.

Did I ever ask you h ow so m u ch em ot ion can f it in t o su ch a sm all per son ? You ar e a h u m an spon ge, n ot on ly car r yin g you r em ot ion s, bu t soak in g u p t h e em ot ion s of ever yon e ar ou n d you as w ell. M aybe t h at ?s w h y som et im es you com e h om e f r om sch ool an d all you can do sin g at t h e t op of you r lu n gs u n t il ever yon e t ells you t o sh u t u p. M aybe t h at ?s w h y you con st an t ly f in d you r self dan cin g, n ot alw ays t o m u sic, bu t of t en t o t h e sim ple beat of ever yday lif e.

Bu t w h en t h er e is m u sic, I w at ch you com e alive? t h e r h yt h m possesses you , an d you dan ce w it h t h e r aw sou l of t h e sou n d w aves. Som et im es you ?ve got t a ju st Tw ist an d Sh ou t gir l, leave t h ose Tom bst on e Blu es f ar beh in d you .

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Have you ever been in aw e of all t h e f or m s t h at you r m alleable-gir l-self cou ld possibly becom e? I k n ow you h ave all sor t s of dr eam s: t h er apist , w r it er , m ot h er , bar t en der , dog ow n er . Can you pict u r e t h e dim ly lit , bu t gen er ally clean , bar w h er e you f ix people?s dr in k s w it h ease, h an din g ou t t h at sly, k n ow in g sm ile of you r s as you car ef u lly pr act ice t h ose n ew t h er apeu t ic t ech n iqu es you ju st lear n ed in college? Can you f eel you r f in ger s t ypin g st or ies on a k eyboar d w it h w or ds t h at you h aven?t qu it e decided on ?

Can you pr act ically t ast e t h at big h ou se in Flor ida, w h er e you h ave alr eady in vit ed Im m a an d Abba t o live in du r in g t h eir old age? Can you sm ell t h e salt of t h e ocean as you r m an y dogs an d ch ildr en t ak e on t h e w aves, cu r ls f low in g w ildly in t h e w in d? I k n ow it all seem s lik e a m ir age t h at look s so close at f ir st , bu t k eeps get t in g f ar t h er w it h ever y st ep you t ak e, bu t on e day you ar e goin g t o f in d t h at you r legs h ave gr ow n lon g en ou gh t o cat ch u p. ?

An d w h er e w ill I be? Well, I?ll h ave t o get back t o you on t h at on e.

Or iya Falk

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M y Af r opu f f Abigail Br asch I got t w o con t in en t s/ divided By olive sk in an d alm on d eyes Con st r ain in g m y in n er st r en gt h s Wat er pain t in g t h is sk in M am a gave

Th ey said alm on d eyes m ean s You don't look Jew ish

Bu t m y m ot h er con ver t m ade m y Jew ish f at h er m or e h oly Fr om cat h olic con f ession s t o Jew ish ju dgem en t Or t h odox babies ou t of Ph illipin o ch er okee blood

M om an d dad w or ked h ou r s Wh ile t ak in g of f ever y sh abbat To spen d t h ou san ds on Jew ish t u it ion Dou ble t h e classes & f or bidden t o slack Expr essin g du al iden t it y & f or bidden t o m ask Wh at 's m or e con ver t t h an t h at ?

M y alm on d eyes, beam in g M ade of Jor dan ian salt , in a w ou n d Bu r n s en ou gh t o m ake you scr eam , h eals En ou gh t o be an im pr om pt u oin t m en t

St in gs at f ir st dip, alw ays scr u bbin g Dir t f r om som e Ju daic open -en ded qu est ion , con du ct in g Bodily pu r if icat ion , w eavin g M y sign at u r e over an d over again In t agalog an d h ebr ew

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If Noah Pogon it z Josh , m y br ot h er , I am w r it in g t o you becau se I w an t t o sh ar e m y lif e exper ien ces so you t oo can lear n f r om t h em , an d n ot m ak e t h e sam e m ist ak es I m ade. It ?s im por t an t t h at you act as a mensch, h ave good ch ar act er . You r ch ar act er is a r epr esen t at ion of ou r f am ily. Ou r f am ily t h at st an ds on r espect , h on est y, ch ar it abilit y, m in df u ln ess, an d r espon sibilit y.

Th en sh e said, ?Th is dollar gives m e en ou gh m on ey t o st ay at a h ot el f or t h e n igh t , an d I h aven't been able t o do t h at in m on t h s.? Th is is w h en I r ealized t h at givin g ch ar it y is r eally im por t an t even if you t h in k it w on?t m at t er .

If you dr ive w it h m om , st op at a st op ligh t , an d see a h om eless per son , you sh ou ld be ch ar it able t o t h em becau se it can h elp m ake t h eir lif e easier , an d t h ey w ill w an t t o h elp you . Don?t be t oo ch ar it able becau se bein g ch ar it able t o a per son w h o w ill abu se it an d bu y illegal it em s w it h it , is a w ast e of ch ar it y.

On ce w h en w alk in g in t o sh u l, I saw a m an w alk in g w it h an au t ist ic m an . As I w at ch ed, an ot h er m an w alked u p t o t h e t w o m en an d on ly sh ook t h e h an d of t h e m an w it h ou t au t ism , an d said, ?Good Sh abbat ,? n ot validat in g t h at t h e m an w it h au t ism w as an adu lt as w ell. Th e m an pat t ed t h e au t ist ic m an on t h e h ead an d said in a sin g son g voice, ?Good Sh abbat t o you , t oo.? As t h e m an w alked aw ay, I saw t h e m an w it h au t ism begin t o cr y. Th is w as w h en I r ealized t h at n o m at t er w h o it is, an d n o m at t er w h et h er you t h in k t h e per son u n der st an ds or deser ves you r r espect , you st ill n eed t o give it . If you don't , people cou ld be ser iou sly h u r t .

On e t im e af t er I w on a baseball t ou r n am en t , I cam e h om e t o m y m ot h er an d I began t ellin g h er abou t t h e t ou r n am en t . Th en I saw you an d I r ealized t h at you look ed qu it e sad, so I ask ed you w h at w as goin g on . You said, ?Ju st t oday I lost m y ch am pion sh ip in m y leagu e.? Th at 's w h en I r ealized it 's alw ays im por t an t t o be m in df u l of ot h er s.

If you w alk in t o a sh u l an d see a m an , an d a m an w it h au t ism ,You sh ou ld r em em ber t o r espect ot h er s becau se ever ybody deser ves r espect despit e disabilit ies. How ever , t h er e m ay be a select f ew w h o em er ge t h at don't deser ve r espect su ch as a bu lly. It ?s im por t an t t o r em em ber n ot t o validat e ever yt h in g an ot h er m ay say becau se it m ay n ot alw ays be r igh t .

If you ever w in a baseball t ou r n am en t an d com e h om e an d t ell m om h ow w ell you played in t h e t ou r n am en t , you sh ou ld be m in df u l of ot h er s becau se t h en ot h er s w ill be m in df u l of you . M ake su r e t o be aw ar e if som eon e is h avin g a bad day or per f or m ed badly in t h eir t ou r n am en t . Bu t , don?t be t oo m in df u l of ot h er s becau se it can cau se you t o t ak e you r ow n self f or gr an t ed.

I w as on ce w alk in g in t h e m all an d on e of m y f r ien ds w alked u p t o m e. He ask ed m e, ?Wh at w er e you doin g last n igh t ?? I didn't w an t t o t ell h im t h at I sat in bed an d did n ot h in g, so I t old h im t h at I w as at an ot h er on e of m y f r ien ds?h ou ses. I ju st t h ou gh t it w as a h ar m less w h it e lie, bu t t h en I w at ch ed h ow an ger gr ew on m y f r ien d?s f ace. He t h en t old m e t h at h e h ad asked t h at ot h er f r ien d t o h an g ou t , an d t h at f r ien d h ad said t h at h e w as u n able t o h an gou t becau se h e w as ou t w it h h is f am ily. At t h at m om en t I r ealized t h at you m u st be h on est even if you t h in k t h at lyin g w on't do an y h ar m .

On ce I w as at Six f lags w it h ou r lit t le cou sin , Aar on , t h er e I w as su pposed t o t ak e car e of h im , an d w at ch h im t o m ake su r e t h at h e w ou ldn't get lost . Bu t I w an t ed t o go on a r ide t h at h e w asn't t all en ou gh f or . So in st ead of n ot goin g t o t h e r ide, I t old h im t o w ait f or m e t o get of f t h e r ide. Wh en I got of f t h e r ide, h e w as n ow h er e t o be f ou n d. I st ar t ed t o r u n ar ou n d yellin g h is n am e. I st ar t ed t o cr y r ealizin g h ow badly I m essed u p. Th an k G-d t h er e w as a secu r it y gu ar d w it h m y cou sin , so I w as able t o f in d h im . I t h en r ealized t h at I h ad t o be f ar m or e r espon sible.

If you w alk in t o a m all an d see a f r ien d, you sh ou ld be h on est w it h h im becau se t h en h e w ill be h on est w it h you . You sh ou ld be h on est becau se if you lie, it can cau se you t o be t h ou gh t of as u n t r u st w or t h y. Alt h ou gh , don?t be t oo h on est becau se givin g you r h on est opin ion can m ak e som eon e f eel bad, an d it is h u r t f u l.

If you ar e at Six Flags w it h you r lit t le cou sin , Aar on , an d you ar e su pposed t o t ak e car e of h im so t h at h e w on?t get lost , t h en keep you r eye on h im . It is im por t an t t o t ak e r espon sibilit y f or you r ow n act ion s so t h at you can be t h ou gh t of as a r espon sible. You sh ou ldn't alw ays t ak e r espon sibilit y f or ot h er s becau se it cou ld look as if you ar e claim in g act ion s even t h ou gh t h ey w er en't you r ow n .

I w as on ce dr ivin g w it h M om an d w e st opped at a st op ligh t . We saw a h om eless lady. Th en , M om st ar t ed t o r oll dow n t h e w in dow. I t h en said, ?No m om , don?t ! Sh e look s sm elly an d scar y an d you r on e dollar w on't do an yt h in g f or h er ." Th en , M om said, ?Com e on , h on ey, it w ill be f in e.? M om t h en r olled dow n h er w in dow an d gave t h e lady t h e dollar . Af t er m om h an ded t h e m on ey t o t h e lady, t h e w om en st ar t ed t o t ear u p.

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Rem em ber in g t h e Fou r t h Boy on t h e Tr ain Plat f or m Sar a Rich t er This Soliloquy is based on the short story ?Samuel?by Grace Paley. The character that these thoughts are formulated on is the man on the train who pulls the emergency brake when he sees four young boys on the train?s platform. The character pulls the emergency brake thinking he is doing the right thing and saving the young boys who he thinks are in trouble, which they are. In the story, this character regrets being a bystander in his life and recognizes that it is his time to stand up for something. In the future, this character is paralyzed from a motor vehicle accident and is in some type of coma making a decision to live or die. While he is comatose, he thinks about the train accident ten years ago when he had to make a decision. This character, although he is in the older stage of life, is still trying to learn a lesson and grow out of a flaw he has found in himself ever since he was young. This character highly values his small family, a wife and daughter. This character speaks eloquently and full of regret and tries turning his fatal experience into motivation to grow personally. The character?s motivation is his daughter, Laura. The character?s goals are to use the experience as a learning medium and learn to act thoughtfully. The character experiences confusion, reflection, regret, acceptance, and finally an awakening both physically and mentally. The character was in a some type of sleep in a hospital bed due to motor vehicle accident then woke up.

I can on ly see br igh t n ess, n ot h in g else. I f eel t h e sof t sh eet s an d sm all pillow pr oppin g m y h eavy h ead u p on t h e h ospit al bed, bu t am u n able t o posit ion t h e pillow com f or t ably. I sm ell t h e st r on g an d f am iliar scen t of a doct or ?s of f ice, t h e on e t h at m ak es k ids n er vou s. It ?s m ak in g m e n er vou s as w ell. I am u n able t o cover m y cold peek in g t oes w it h t h e sh eet s. I am st ar t in g t o get f r u st r at ed. I am u n able t o scr at ch t h e it ch I f eel dow n m y back . I am u n able t o open m y eyes. I am u n able t o t ell m y w if e, w h o I h ear sobbin g in t h e cor n er of t h e r oom , t h at ever yt h in g is ok ay an d t h at I w ill be f in e. I am u n able t o m ove or even open m y m ou t h . Wh at is h appen in g ar ou n d m e? I h ear a st eady r h yt h m of beeps, I h ear m u r m u r s of n u r ses an d m y w if e silen t ly pr ayin g an d t alk in g t o God, som et h in g t er r ible m u st h ave h appen ed t o m e. Oh God, w h at led m e h er e? A f ew days pass, an d I am in t h e sam e con dit ion . I?m so sick of lyin g h er e u seless. I?m so exh au st ed. I can n ot h an dle lyin g h er e an ym or e. Sh ou ld I ju st pu t an en d t o t h is im m en se su f f er in g. No, I h ave t o k eep t r yin g, m y w if e an d Lau r a w ou ld be devast at ed.

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I h ear Lau r a beggin g m e t o w ak e u p w h ile h er speech is laced w it h sof t sobs.

Lau r a says, ?Dad, com e on , I k n ow you h ave t h e f igh t in you t o w ak e u p, I k n ow you do, I k n ow it , I ju st k n ow it . Dam n t h at st u pid car .? I t h en h ear d h er w ail, a w ail I h ave n ever h ear d escape h er lips bef or e, n ot even w h en Gr an dm a died. I f eel gu ilt y. I f eel vu ln er able. I w ish sh e w ou ld st op, I can n ot st an d it an ym or e, n ot bein g able t o do an yt h in g. Wh y cou ldn?t I do an yt h in g, som et h in g? Wh at cou ld I do t o m ak e Lau r a st op? You k n ow w h at , I cou ld do som et h in g, I can f igh t w h at ever is pr even t in g m e f r om st an din g u p... or I cou ld give u p an d it w ill ju st be t h e en d. Lau r a con t in u ed, ?It ?s all u p t o you n ow , Dad, it ?s you r decision at t h is poin t , w ak e u p.? Af t er , Lau r a said w h at sh e h ad said I w as r em in ded of a t im e, abou t t en year s ago, w h en I w as f aced w it h a sim ilar con f lict , sh ou ld I st an d u p or let w h at is h appen in g con t in u e t o h appen ? I w as on t h e w ay t o t h e of f ice. On t h e t r ain , I w as f ixin g m y in digo t ie w h ich m at ch ed m y su it jack et , as I h ad t o look m or e pu t t oget h er becau se of an im por t an t m eet in g I w as goin g t o h ave t h at day. As I w as f in ish in g t h e or deal w it h m y w r in k ly t ie, I h ear d t h e cou gh of a you n g boy an d t h e ech oin g pou n d of a h an d on a back alon g w it h m u t ed w or ds. I peer ed ou t of t h e f oggy an d w or n ou t t r ain car door w in dow w h er e t h e sou n d w as com in g f r om an d saw f ou r you n g boys on t h e plat f or m . Som et h in g w as goin g on , t oo m u ch . I w as con t em plat in g doin g som et h in g abou t it , bu t I r em em ber ed seein g a w om an go ou t an d t ell t h em t o k n ock it of f alr eady, an d t h ey disr egar ded ever yt h in g sh e h ad said. If I w as goin g t o do som et h in g, it h ad t o be st r on g an d im pact f u l. I w as n ever asser t ive, u su ally passive, a byst an der . I w it n essed k ids bein g bu llied in elem en t ar y sch ool w h en I w as you n ger , a lady bein g m u gged a w eek pr ior , m y par en t s f igh t in g an d st r u gglin g, bu t I n ever did an yt h in g abou t it . I ju st sat an d look ed on , ju st lik e ever ybody else. All of t h is gu ilt an d r egr et bu ilt u p in side of m e, an d I cou ld n ot bear it an ym or e. I k n ew I cou ld n ot ju st sit an d look on lik e ot h er s on t h e t r ain , bu t I h ad t o f in ally st an d u p an d m ak e u p f or all t h e m issed oppor t u n it ies I h ad t o st an d u p.

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So I st ood u p, t all an d st r on g. I st r aigh t en ed m y back an d w alk ed dow n t h e aisle w h ile bein g look ed at an d ju dged by all t h e ot h er passen ger s, bu t I did n ot car e on e bit , I w as goin g t o save t h ese you n g k ids w h o pu t t h em selves in t h is pr ecar iou s an d even lif e-t h r eat en in g sit u at ion . So I did it , I pu lled t h e t r ain?s em er gen cy br eak k n ow in g I w as doin g good f or on ce an d n ot ju st sit t in g. Wh en I pu lled t h e br ak e, I f elt lik e I f in ally h ad f illed a void in t h e m ar k I w ou ld leave on t h e w or ld. I n ever expect ed w h at h appen ed n ext . Ever yon e on t h e t r ain w as pu sh ed an d t ossed ar ou n d t h e t r ain car , I f ell an d slid t o t h e f r on t of t h e car . I q u ick ly st ood u p, f or t h e secon d t im e, t o be m et w it h m or e r egr et an d gu ilt t h at I h ad ever exper ien ced or w an t ed t o exper ien ce. Wh en I pr essed m y f ace u p t o t h e dir t y glass of t h e t r ain car w in dow , I on ly saw t h r ee you n g boys on t h e plat f or m , st an din g sh ou lder t o sh ou lder . Th e look on t h e you n g boys f aces w as on e I h ad n ever seen bef or e an d cou ld n ot iden t if y. Th ey seem ed t er r if ied, sad, an d sh ock ed all in t h e sam e m om en t . I k n ew exact ly w h at h appen ed, I k illed h im . I k illed t h e boy, t h e f ou r t h boy, w h o w as ban gin g t h e back of t h e ch ild w h o w as cou gh in g. I didn?t m ean t o do it , obviou sly. I t h ou gh t I w as doin g t h e r igh t t h in g, f in ally st an din g u p f or som et h in g in st ead of ju st look in g on . I t h ou gh t I w as doin g t h e r igh t t h in g. I n ever gr ew t o f or give m yself f or doin g w h at I did. How cou ld I? I am a m u r der er , m aybe I sh ou ld ju st st ay h er e an d n ot st an d u p. Bu t , n o, m y f am ily. I t h in k abou t t h at f at ef u l day ever yday an d I t r y t o u se t h is t r au m at izin g exper ien ce as a w ay t o t h in k bef or e I do t h in gs, an d t o m ak e su r e t h at w h en I st an d u p, I st an d u p w it h cer t ain t y, n ot im pu lse. Th in k in g abou t w h at h appen ed w h ile lyin g m ot ion less an d u n able t o do an yt h in g, all I w an t ed t o do w as m eet t h e you n g boy on ce again , st an d u p, an d say, ?I?m sor r y.? ?Wh at ??, I h ear d Lau r a say, ?Did you ju st say, ?I?m sor r y ?, Dad, h ello, can you open you r eyes?? Th en , I h ad f in ally m ade a decision t o st an d u p w it h cer t ain t y, an d n ot im pu lse. I did n ot sim ply allow t h in gs t o h appen as I h ad alw ays don e. I m ade a ch oice. I f ou gh t t h e pain I w as exper ien cin g an d I... I

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How t o Be a Good Older Sist er Dah lia M at an k y Wh en h e eat s t h e past a you saved in t h e f r idge an d look ed f or w ar d t o eat in g all day, r esist t h e u r ge t o bit e h im lik e you u sed t o do w h en you w er e seven .

Rem in d h im h e n eeds t o ask bef or e t ak in g. Rem in d you r self t h at you ar e r eally on ly a year an d a h alf apar t , so you pr obably sh ou ldn't scold h im as if you w er e h is m ot h er .

Appr eciat e h ow h e h as gr ow n , look in t o t h ose big br ow n pu ppy-dog eyes an d see t h e r ef lect ion of a bet t er you . Feel pr ou d. You m ade h im t h is w ay an d h e k n ow s it .

Wh en h e st ar t s t alk in g t o gir ls, r em em ber t o give h im h is space. Tr y t o on ly sn oop t h r ou gh som e of h is t ext s.

Yell back as h e accu ses you of in vadin g h is pr ivacy. Th en let h im f lop on t o you r bed an d ven t t o you . Appr eciat e h im as on e of you best f r ien ds.

Sh ow h im t h e r an dom t h in g you f ou n d h yst er ical, if h e doesn't lau gh , t ick le h im t ill h e?s f or ced t o ch an ge h is m in d- block in g h is an n oyed k ick s w it h a pillow w h ile doin g so.

Wh en you look t h r ou gh old ph ot os t oget h er , gr im ace as you adm it t h at h is ch u bby squ ar e f ace qu alif ied h im as a cu t er ch ild t h an you . Wat ch h im gr in w it h h is sin gle dim ple. Roll you r eyes in r espon se.

Th en w at ch as h is lif e st ar t s cr ash in g. Feel w ou n ded t h at h e didn't t ell you abou t all of t h is f ir st s.

Hear you r m ot h er cr y f r om an ger an d disappoin t m en t . Def en d h is w r on g doin gs t o you r par en t s, on ly go again st h im on ce t h ey leave.

Tr y t o pr ot ect h im f r om t h e w or ld. Realize you can't .

Cr y w h en h e isn't look in g. Hide t h at you f ear t h e pat h h e is begin n in g. Tr y t o en cou r age h im t o do h is best , t o n ot f ollow in you r f oot st eps.

Beh ave bet t er t o m ak e h im pr ou d. Be t h e exem plar y f igu r e h e n eeds. Wat ch h im st u m ble, t oo soon . St ar e in t o h is sou l as you pu n ch h im lovin gly w h ile layin g on h is cou ch w it h h im .

An d of cou r se, Never st op adm ir in g h is Deep, Br ow n , In n ocen t , Big, Pu ppy-dog eyes.

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At Lake M ich igan Rebeca Pr ice Alt h ou gh t h e w in d is cold an d bit t er , By t h e sh or es of Lake M ich igan A blon de gir l in a blu e t ee sh ir t an d jeggin gs M akes h er w ay t ow ar ds t h e w at er s.

Her sh ou lder -len gt h h air is silk y an d sm oot h , An d even ly f alls ar ou n d h er n ar r ow f ace an d blu e eyes.

A decr epit r ed br ick bat h r oom st an ds on t h e t op of a h ill, Facin g a cir cu lar f ield su r r ou n ded by a gr ay pat h .

In side t h e st alls ar e t eal color An d sm ell like dir t y lau n dr y, an d Th e f loor is m ade f r om dir t y black an d w h it e t iles.

Alon g t h e w h it e an d beige pebble pat h Ar e br ow n r ock s over look in g t h e clear blu e lake An d adjacen t t o t h e pat h is a lar ge r oad, Wh er e h u n dr eds of car s dr ive past at f u ll speed.

Next t o t h e r oad is a gr een glass bot t le Wit h yellow an d w h it e w r it in g on t h e label Th at ?s cr acked at t h e m ou t h .

Up by t h e sh or e of t h e lake is a w h it e dock Wit h lit t le w h it e sailboat s t ied t o it Th at bob u p an d dow n in t h e w in d.

Th e gir l m oves h er h an ds w h ile sh e t alk s.

Sh e is an old f r ien d f r om m iddle sch ool.

We t alk abou t sch ool an d classes, An d sh e seem s t o be doin g so m u ch bet t er t h an m e.

Sh e t u ck s a lock of h air beh in d h er ear , An d descr ibes h er ph ysics t each er an d h er algebr a 2 class.

An yon e w h o w alked past w ou ld be st u n n ed som eon e t h is sm all w as so sm ar t .

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Up t h e pat h , a br idge f or w alker s st r et ch es acr oss t h e r oad, It is old an d con cr et e, An d it s st eep st air s sag sligh t ly u n der t h e w eigh t of exist en ce.

On t h e st air s is old gu m pr essed t o t h e sides by pedest r ian s An d an old piece of pizza sit s on t h e st air s, Wait in g f or a r oden t t o eat it .

Th e w aves slow ly sw ell u p an d t h e car s dr ive by qu ick ly, M ak in g t h e pedest r ian s f eel sm all an d slow.

A f ly bu zzes n ear m e, An d I con sider squ ash in g it , Un t il I r em em ber it m ost likely f eels ju st as sm all as I do.

It becom es m y f r ien d f or a f ew secon ds, An d f ollow s m e t o t h e br idge.

It is cu r iou s abou t m y ear an d explor es t h e f olds on t h e ou t side, Un t il I ch ase it aw ay.

Th e w aves slow ly sw ell u p an d t h e car s dr ive by qu ick ly, M ak in g m e f eel sm all an d alon e.

Th e people w alk by, livin g t h eir ow n com plet e lives, Kn ow in g t h eir dest in at ion an d t h e pat h t h ey n eed t o get t h er e.

I sh r in k in t o m yself , Not k n ow in g w h er e I am goin g, f eelin g lost again st t h e w in d.

If you sh ou ld st an d h er e, You w ou ld sm ell cr isp w in d an d f r esh ly cu t gr ass.

You w ou ld t ast e f r esh w at er spr ayin g An d f eel you r ch est ach e w it h in secu r it y, Feel you h ave k n ow clu e w h at t h e f u t u r e h olds or h ow t o get t h er e.

Th is is t h e f ir st st ep t o adu lt h ood: Lon gin g f or an sw er s, Feelin g like a bu sy sea, An d t h en f or gin g you r ow n pat h t h r ou gh t h e bit t er w in d.

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Dow n Th e Road Fr om Sh u l Nat h an Sh apir o Alt h ou gh t h e su n is set t in g an d M in ch a t im e is appr oach in g, dow n t h e r oad f r om sh u l a w h it e bear ded m an is sit t in g in h is cr isp, n ew w h it e sedan on t h e side of t h e r oad.

Th e sm ell is t h at of w ar m , sw eet su m m er air , a sm ell t h at w ar m s t h e body t o t h e cor e.

Th e gr ass beside t h e sidew alk n ext t o t h e car h as u n t r im m ed, t h in br an ch es h an gin g over it , w it h leaves on t h e gr ou n d, an d gar bage scat t er ed in t h is n eglect ed par t of t h e r oad.

Th e r oad is a n ot iceably w or n dow n af t er h ar sh , bit t er cold w in t er s, an d piles of salt pou r ed on it year af t er year .

All is r ed an d or an ge: t h e r ecedin g r ays of t h e set t in g su n , t h e r ays h it t in g t h e sh u l, t h e r ef lect ion of t h e su n of f t h e car s.

Th er e st an ds t h e sam e w h it e car , sit t in g aw k w ar dly on t h e side of t h e r oad, w it h an im m acu lat e, n ew coat of lu xu r iou s w h it e pain t , t h e t ype t h at ju st m ak es you w an t t o r u n you r f in ger over it m ak in g a squ eak in g n oise.

Th e car is com plet e w it h an im m acu lat e, r it zy in t er ior , f illed w it h sm oot h gr ay f abr ic seat s an d a st at e-of -t h e-ar t GPS display.

Dow n t h e r oad, beh in d an ot h er com plex, st an ds a h idden syn agogu e, w it h a n eat lit t le sidew alk car ved ou t f r om a plain of gr ass, leadin g t o a w ooden door t h at givin g of f a sligh t cr eak w h en you open it , ju st lik e a r eassu r in g w h isper .

Th e w h it e-bear ded m an r olls dow n t h e w in dow.

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He is t h e h oly m an w h o sit s an d lear n s Tor ah in t en t ly all day. He t ells m e t h at h e en joys h ear in g m e lein f r om t h e Tor ah an d I ask h im w h y h e w ait s in h is car at t h e side of t h e r oad.

He t ells m e it gives h im t h e peace an d qu iet h e n eeds t o t h in k .

Th er e is a special w ar m t h an d glow displayed on h is f ace, lik e t h e Tor ah h e h as lear n ed h as in f u sed an en er gy in t o h is sou l, cir cu lat in g t h r ou gh ou t h is body.

Dow n on t h e m ajor t h or ou gh f ar e n ear t h e syn agogu e car s zip by an d by, on ly st oppin g at t h e r ed ligh t s f or t h e Jew s cr ossin g in pair s or gr ou ps t o get t o sh u l acr oss t h e st r eet .

Wh en a big t r u ck passes, a blast of w in d is f elt an d you t u r n ar ou n d you r h ead t o saf et y f r om du st an d pebbles h eaded you r w ay.

War m , peacef u l, an d r een er gizin g, t h e f eelin g of f u lf illm en t , n ot at t ain able by a body w it h ou t a sou l? In t h e sh u l, t h e Ch azan says t h e sam e r epet it ion of t h e Am idah at ever y pr ayer . He m ain t ain s a cer t ain r h yt h m t h at is peacef u l f or t h e ear an d I an sw er am en t o h is sw eet blessin gs.

War m , peacef u l, an d r een er gizin g, t h e su n is set t in g an d en din g an ot h er day of blessin g? back in t h e par k in g lot of t h e sh u l ar e a lot f u ll of car s w ait in g pat ien t ly t o dr ive aw ay in dif f er en t dir ect ion s t o dif f er en t dest in at ion s, on ly leavin g an em pt y con cr et e lan dscape t o be f illed again t h e n ext m or n in g.

Th e sk y seem s per f ect . M ajest ic.

I h ave seen it over an d over again ever y even in g. Th e w ar m , h ope f illed r ays of G-d?s su n f illin g t h e w or ld w it h a r ich blast of color , slow ly closin g ou t an ot h er day.

If you sh ou ld r each ou t t ow ar ds t h e h eaven s an d t r y t o t ou ch t h e r ays of t h e su n you r h an ds w ou ld be over com e by w ar m t h , w h ile t h e r est of you r body w ou ld be sh iver in g, an d you r eyes w ou ld be over com e by t h e st r on g ligh t . It is lik e w h at w e im agin e t h e ligh t of h eaven t o be: ext r em ely w ar m , h oly en ou gh t o m ak e you t r em ble, an d blin din g t o t h e h u m an eye, u n explain able, u n capt u r able, in com pr eh en sible, u n k n ow n .

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Du r in g t h at Win t er Bat sh eva Gu bin Du r in g t h at w in t er

Du r in g t h at w in t er ?

Wh en r ein deer s cou ld f ly;

Wh ich m ay h ave n ever been at all;

Wh en t h e pu r pose of sn ow

Bu t w h ich h as becom e m or e r eal

Was t o f r eeze you ;

Th an t h e on e t h at w as ?

Wh en bar e br an ch es

Hot ch ocolat e r u led.

(Sk in n ed n ak ed Ice cold f r ozen

Rich cr eam y ch ocolat e

No in sect s cr aw lin g

Hot m ilk w ar m in g t h e sh iver s on you r body

Br eak in g of f it by bit Heat in g you r ch eek s; Dr y an d cr u m blin g) Lyin g you r elaxed w it h t h e best par t , Wer e f allin g t o t h e gr ou n d Th e f lu f f y w h ip cr eam , Wh ile h oldin g layer s of sn ow To spr ead ar ou n d you r m ou t h Deep deep dow n You r lips In t o f r ozen lak e w at er s You r t on gu e Of t h e f or est s; Again st t h e back of you r t h r oat ;

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An d w h en t h e last sip w as t ak en , Th er e w as m or e t o slu r p: It w as a w in t er of n ever en din g dr in k s, Of t h ir st qu ick ly begin n in g An d qu ick ly lost Wit h t h e n ext car eless gu lpin g.

Th e sips ar e f ew er n ow.

Each sip k ept f or a lon g t im e, Hesit an t t o sw allow.

It in a dr aw er bu ilt by m y love, Th e w in t er w h ich m aybe n ever w as Has been saved an d r et ain ed.

An d w h en w e pu ll ou t t h e dr aw er An d sm ell t h e ch ocolat e pow der , Let it st ay in you r n ose: Rein deer s can f ly again .

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Dear M y Lit t le Red IPod Nan o Tam ar Ch avel I n ever got t o t h an k you . Today you r par t s ar e lik ely disper sed am on g ot h er Apple pr odu ct s or layin g in a lan df ill an d pollu t in g ou r at m osph er e, bu t I w ill alw ays see you as m y t r easu r ed iPod n an o.

You r in f lu en ce h as gu ided m y lif e in pr eviou sly u n im agin able w ays. You m ade it possible f or m e t o love m u sic, dan ce, an d m y siblin gs. You h elped m e f in d m y t alen t , be h ealt h y, an d lear n t o boogie.

Wh en I r eceived you as a Ch an u k ah pr esen t in f ir st gr ade, I n ever w ou ld h ave gu essed t h e w on der s you w ou ld in t r odu ce t o m y lif e. I st ill r em em ber t h e f ir st son g I dow n loaded on t o you : Love St or y by Taylor Sw if t . You t h ou gh t t h at I w as ju st h avin g f u n , bu t you w er e w r on g. By pr ovidin g m e w it h m u sic, you w er e slow ly ch an gin g m y lif e.

As I began t o dow n load m or e son gs by Taylor Sw if t , Sou lja Boy, Kelly Clar k son , an d ot h er ar t ist s of t h e 2000s an d 2010s, m y love of m u sic an d r h yt h m gr ew.

I r em em ber plu ggin g you in t o a speak er an d dan cin g ar ou n d m y bedr oom an d ju m pin g on t h e bed, celebr at in g w h en ever som et h in g good w ou ld h appen . Fir st I w ou ld play ?Wh en I Gr ow Up?

by Th e Pu ssycat Dolls. Next in t h e qu eu e w ou ld be ?Replay ? by Iyaz t h en ?Fir e Bu r n in g? by Sean Kin gst on , an d af t er t h at : ?Wh at ch a Say,? ?Pict u r e t o Bu r n ,? ?Um br ella,? an d so on . Th e spr in gs of m y bed w ou ld squ eal an d m y st eps w ou ld cr eat e a t h u d sou n d as t h ey h it t h e f loor , cau sin g m y f am ily t o r u sh in t o t h e r oom t o ch eck if I f ell of f t h e bed or in ju r ed m yself in som e ot h er w ay. In st ead t h ey w ou ld f in d m e br eat h in g h eavily, w it h dish eveled h air , sligh t ly sw eat y, an d f illed w it h joy.

Wh en I m oved cit ies a year an d a h alf af t er you becam e m y obsession , I n eglect f u lly lef t you beh in d.

St ill, m u sic h as gu ided m y lif e ever sin ce. Th r ou gh ou t m iddle sch ool an d t h e begin n in g of h igh sch ool, list en in g t o m u sic w as m y escape in t o m y ow n w or ld. Wh en I got m y licen se, I began dr ivin g ar ou n d t h e n eigh bor h ood, list en in g t o m u sic t o clear m y h ead.

Even in w eat h er below f r eezin g I w ou ld r oll dow n t h e w in dow s. Wear in g a h u ge coat an d w it h m y h air blow in g in t h e w in d I w ou ld w h izz dow n Dem pst er St r eet , t h e r oad w it h t h e h igh est speed lim it in m y n eigh bor h ood, 35 m iles an h ou r . Blast in g m y f avor it e playlist , ?FUN,? I w ou ld belt ou t all t h e w or ds t o ?Cooler Th an M e,? ?No Pr oblem ,? ?I Wan t It Th at Way,? ?Wh er e Is t h e Love,? ?M agic in t h e Ham pt on s,? an d all t h e ot h er son gs on t h at list .

Becau se of you , m u sic h as alw ays been t h er e f or m e, bu t n ot on ly in a su ppor t ive w ay.

Som e of t h e st r on gest con n ect ion s I h ave w it h f r ien ds w er e cem en t ed t h r ou gh ou r m u t u al love of m u sic. On e of m y best cam p f r ien ds an d I en su r e t h at w e con sist en t ly st ay in t ou ch by r egu lar ly sen din g each ot h er m u sic su ggest ion s. Som e of ou r t ext con ver sat ion s con sist of u s on ly sen din g son g n am es back an d f or t h .

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You r in f lu en ce on m y lif e r each es beyon d m u sic; m y love of m u sic led m e t o love dan ce. I t ook h ip-h op classes f r om t h ir d gr ade t h r ou gh t en t h , an d alt h ou gh I st opped, I con t in u e t o ch or eogr aph an d lear n r ou t in es w h en ever I h ave f r ee t im e. Dan ce classes en er gized m e an d f u eled m y cr eat ivit y. Th ey also en abled m e t o m ain t ain a h ealt h y w eigh t , becau se ever y t im e I at e a jolly r an ch er , m y f avor it e can dy, it w ou ld be m at ch ed w it h a dan ce m ove. Th ose classes h elped m e t o discover m y t alen t s an d develop m y sk ills.

Dan ce also st r en gt h en ed m y r elat ion sh ip w it h m y older sist er . Fou r year s ago sh e f in ish ed h igh sch ool an d m oved ou t , bu t ever y w in t er br eak sh e w ou ld com e on ou r f am ily t r ip t o visit ou r gr an dpar en t s, an d m y f avor it e par t w as alw ays spen din g t im e t oget h er ch or eogr aph in g. Ever y m or n in g w e w ou ld w ak e u p ear ly, w h ich on vacat ion t im e m ean t eleven o?clock , an d dr ive t h e golf car t t o t h e dan ce st u dio in m y gr an dpar en t s?gat ed com m u n it y. As w e dr ove, m u sic played f r om on e of ou r ph on es an d w e w ou ld sin g alon g, t h e per son on t h e passen ger side t ak in g sn apch at videos of ou r lau gh t er an d sm iles. Wh en w e ar r ived at t h e st u dio w e w ou ld sign in an d plu g on e of ou r ph on es in t o t h e speak er . Af t er f if t een m in u t es in w h ich sh e w ou ld st r et ch an d I w ou ld pr et en d t o, w e began t h e ch or eogr aph y. As w e w or k ed on per f ect in g t h e m ovem en t s I f elt ou r bon d becom e r ein f or ced. Ou r r elat ion sh ip f elt especially st r on g at t h e en d of vacat ion w h en t h e dan ce w as com plet ed. Th e sh ar ed accom plish m en t an d su ccess br ou gh t u s closer .

In addit ion t o st r en gt h en in g m y r elat ion sh ip w it h m y sist er , m u sic an d dan ce h ave br ou gh t m e closer t o m y br ot h er . Un t il h e join ed m e in h igh sch ool t h is year w e f ou gh t of t en . At t h e begin n in g of t h is year , t h ou gh , w e st ar t ed dr ivin g t o sch ool t oget h er ever y day an d ou r r elat ion sh ip becam e m or e lovin g. Du r in g t h is t im e I lau n ch ed a m u sical edu cat ion pr ogr am f or h im . Now h e k n ow s m an y of t h e lyr ics t o m y f avor it e son gs. M y pr ou dest m om en t t h is year cam e w as w h en I w as dan cin g t o ?Gold Digger ? by Kan ye West in ou r k it ch en an d m y br ot h er join ed in , dan cin g an d r ecit in g m an y of t h e lyr ics. iPod, you set m y lif e t o a u n iqu e scor e. M y iPh on e h as com plet ely r eplaced you , bu t I w ill r em em ber you f or ever m or e.

Wit h love, Tam ar

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Or an gu t an Daf n a Ku t lir of f Th e au bu r n , h air y Or an gu t an su r r ou n ds h im self Wit h lon g vin es an d t all, f u ll t r ees

A f lash of or an ge h air An d h e ju m ps f r om vin e t o vin e Wit h t h e speed of a r u m or an d a f u ll sm ile

It 's as if h e is eager To get t h e m ost ou t of each t r ee To see as m u ch as h e possibly can

I ju m p f r om each lon g vin e, Car eless an d f r ee Soon I w ill be sm ilin g at m y last t r ee

An d I, t oo, ch er ish ever y m om en t Wit h ou t sk ippin g a beat To ch er ish m y n ext m om en t 86

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Du r in g Th at Su m m er Josh Pogon it z Du r in g t h at su m m er Wh en t oot h f air ies w er e st ill possible; w h en t h e pu r pose of lif e w as t o collect can dy; w h en w alk in g dow n t h e st r eet (In dar k n ess on a Fr iday n igh t w h en t h e sk y w as pit ch black an d you cou ld h ear t h e an im als t alk in g an d you see an d h ear car s dr ivin g dow n t h e st r eet s slow ly; w ill t h ey st op an d k idn ap m e?)

I m u st n ot t r ip, I m u st k eep w alk in g u n t il I r each m y dest in at ion . Far above an d aw ay Fr om t h e lou d ef f ect s of civilizat ion ; Du r in g t h at su m m er ? w h ich m ay n ever h ave been at all; bu t w h ich h as becom e m or e r eal Th an t h e on e t h at w as? At h let es?au t ogr aph s r u led.

I spot t h e at h let e, h e or sh e w alk s over t ow ar ds m e. Th en t h e best par t h appen sh an din g h im / h er m y it em . M y excit em en t an d joy r oar s. Wat ch in g w it h br igh t ly h u ge eyes, t h e cr isp sign at u r e is in k ed.Holdin g ou t m y h an d f or t h e at h let e t o give m e back m y object ,sw eat dr ips dow n m y f or eh ead w it h excit em en t . I h ope m y excit em en t did n ot over pow er m y polit en ess I w at ch an d h ope t h at t h e n ext at h let e w ill au t ogr aph on e of m y it em s.

Wh en t h e at h let e leaves, I h ope f or an ot h er on e t o w alk over an d sign Bu t w ill t h er e be an ot h er at h let e w h o sign s?

It w as a su m m er of m an y, bu t lim it ed au t ogr aph s. Each au t ogr aph w as appr eciat ed Th e on es I w an t ed w er e even m or e appr eciat ed.

Bu t f or t h e at h let es I k ept on get t in g, Th ey w er e gr adu ally car elessly r eceived.

Th e au t ogr aph s ar e st ill t h er e, m or e an d m or e bein g collect ed. Each on e is collect ed in a det er m in ed w ay. Each on e is h igh ly t ak en car e of , h igh ly appr eciat ed, an d displayed on m y sh elves in m y bedr oom at m y f at h er ?s h ou se, ot h er s at m y m ot h er ?s.

Th e su m m er w h ich m aybe n ever w as capt u r ed an d pr eser ved. An d w h en I am r igh t n ext t o t h e player , an d h old ou t m y h an d f or h e or sh e t o sign m y object , m y object t ou ch es t h e at h let e?s h an d; an d Toot h f air ies becom e possible again .

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You Ar e Abigail Br asch Dear gir ls, boys, m en , w om en , t each er s, st u den t s, doct or s, pr of essor s, polit ician s, en gin eer s, law yer s, ar ch it ect s, act or s, ast r on om er s, scien t ist s an d sin ger s. Dear t h e w or ld. I w an t t o sh ar e w it h you a m essage. Som et h in g t h at cam e t o m e slow ly bu t cam e t o m e even t u ally.

We ar e all livin g am on gst an en em y t h at is ju st so good at pr et en din g. It gives u s f alse con f iden ce, pr et en ds t o m ak e ou r lives bet t er , an d appear s t o m ost of u s at least on ce a day.

Th is en em y h as t r ick ed you in t o h avin g an ever last in g love f or it . Of Cou r se it h as posit ives aspect s as w ell as n egat ives bu t don't let it blin d you . It h as con su m ed you r lif e an d you ar e let t in g it . Ju st let m e ask you a f ew qu est ion s an d t h en in t h e en d you ch ose, ch ose w h at you t h in k is r igh t f or you . All I k n ow is t h at I ask ed m yself t h ese qu est ion s an d I ch ose t o aban don it , t h is t im e-con su m in g en em y of m in e.

Wh y people, Wh y do w e let t h is en em y in t o ou r lif e daily Wh y do w e let it m an ipu lat e ou r lives Wak e u p, click , ch eck , sm ile, f r ow n , close, click ?

Wh y people, do w e let a bu t t on det er m in e ou r h appin ess Wh y do w e spen d h ou r s alt er in g ou r beau t if u l selves f or t h ese bu t t on s Sn ap, cr op, w h it en , size, sh r in k , gr ow , sh in e, spar k le, dar k en , blen d Wh y do w e cr op ou r self s, sh r in k ou r selves, an d w h it en ou r selves f or t h is bu t t on

I k n ow , I u n der st an d.

It 's n ot ju st t h e bu t t on It s st u pid t o t h in k it s ju st a bu t t on r igh t ?

It 's all t h e eyes t h at click t h is bu t t on an d see you It 's t h e lik es, t h e com m en t s, t h e t ext s

Bu t again i'm ask in g w h y?

Wh y do w e n eed t o post a cr opped pict u r e t o t h e w or ld Wh y do w e n eed t o post a cr opped pict u r e f or t h e w or ld t o ju dge Wh at does t h eir ju dgem en t m ean ?

Wh at ever h appen ed t o self ju dgem en t ?

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You ar e pr et t y, r igh t ?

Well t h ey t h in k you ar e pr et t y so you m u st be You go t o t h e bat h r oom an d w ash you r f ace You sm ile in t o t h e w at er Bu t w h y Wh y don't you look in t h e m ir r or ?

You ju st w ipe you r f ace an d w alk r igh t ou t t h e bat h r oom w it h ou t look in g You don't n eed t o look Wh o car es w h at r ef lect s back , r igh t ?

Th ey t h in k you ar e pr et t y, it t h in k s you ar e pr et t y Bu t PEOPLE Wh y?

Again I'm ask in g w h y Wh y do w e let t h ese lik es an d com m en t s def in e w h o w e ar e Wh at w e ar e Wh y do w e let t h em m an ipu lat e ou r em ot ion s Wh y do w e let t h em m ak e or br eak u s.

Ok so post you r pict u r e Go t o bed Wak e u p It s 6am you h ave t en m in u t es u n t il you n eed t o m ak e you r w ay t o t h e bat h r oom so qu ick ly click t h e bu t t on You r h ear t is beat in g Did you get en ou gh lik es?

Wh at if you did n ot get en ou gh lik es?

Wh at if n obody com m en t ed?

You ch eck 305 lik es-- per f ect ?You ar e so beau t if u l? ?Wow so st u n n in g? ?You ar e a m odel?

Ok n ow you can get ou t of bed sm ilin g Now you sk ip t o t h e bat h r oom

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People Wh y can't w e w ak e u p an d go t o t h e m ir r or Ju st look at you r self in t h at m ir r or An d say clear ly ?You ar e beau t if u l? ?You ar e beau t if u l becau se I t h in k you ar e, n ot becau se t h ey do, or it does?

Becau se PEOPLE We ar e all beau t if u l We don't n eed f alse con f ir m at ion We don't n eed appr oval Bu t yet , you allow t h is en em y t o t ak e con t r ol of you r lif e You n eed t o ch eck t h e app ever y ot h er m in u t e You n eed t o m ak e su r e ever yt h in g is ok Ever y lik e is cou n t ed Ever y com m en t is ju st as good as ever yon e else?s People I'm n ot on ly speak in g t o t een age gir ls I'm n ot on ly speak in g t o t h e t er r ible m en t al illn esses t h at ar e n egat ively in f lu en ced by t h is en em y An or exia bu lim ia Or t h or exia Depr ession Su icide Self h at e...

Im speak in g t o you people People m ean in g all people I k n ow you , yes you m an I k n ow you r dau gh t er isn't t h e on ly on e su f f er in g 90

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You f eel gu ilt y af t er you eat t h e cak e t oo Oh an d you w om an , You f eel gu ilt y w h en you m iss you r w or k ou t You ch eck you r ph on e t oo You m ay t ell you r gr an ddau gh t er t o get of f social m edias Bu t you ch eck t oo You r bu sin ess accou n t s on f acebook An d t h e com m en t s an d cu st om er r epor t s t oo So people Wh y m u st w e con t in u e t o let all t h is h at e seep in t o ou r lives Wh y do w e let m in iscu le t h in gs dict at e u s We sh u n com m u n ist s, dict at or sh ips, m on ar ch ies We live in Am er ica r igh t ?

Bu t w e ar e n ot f r ee People w e ar e slaves t o t h ese apps w e ar e bein g blin ded beh in d t h e r ed h ear t s an d com m en t s an d sh in y pict u r es If I can h ope t h at you t ak e on e m essage aw ay f r om t h is please h ear m e ou t n ow People you ar e som et h in g f ar gr eat er t h an a bu t t on You ar e som et h in g gr eat er t h an a lik e You ar e som et h in g gr eat er t h an a cr opped ph ot o You ar e som et h in g gr eat er t h an a com m en t People you ar e YOU An d you ar e BEAUTIFUL

91

91

Ar t

M eir a Lin zer

Ch avie Zeller

Sh osh an a Bar -M eir 92

92

Tam ar Ch avel

Sh osh an a Bar - M eir Taliah Soleym an i 93

93

Pelah Coh en Sh osh an a Bar -M eir

Or iya Falk Sh osh an a Bar -M eir

94

94

Or iya Falk

Tam ar Ch avel

M elin da Bu r gin 95

95

Ph ot ogr aph y an d Ar t Cr edit s 1-2- Or iya Falk

44-45- Taliah Soleym an i

4-5- Sar a Rich t er

46-47- Tam ar Ch avel

6-7- Sh osh an a Bar -M eir

48-49- Tzippy David

8-9 -Taliah Soleym an i

50- Tam ar Ch avel

10-11- Sar ah Rich t er

51- M elin da Bu r gin

12- Rebecca Fr iedm an

52-53- Sar a Rich t er

13- Sh ir a Coh en

54-55- Tova Kah an

14 - Tova Kah an

56- Sar a Rich t er

15- Rebecca Fr iedm an

57- Kelly Sh apir o

16- Tam ar Ch avel

58-59- Pelah Coh en

17- Pelah Coh en

60-61- Sar a Rich t er

18-19- Rebecca Fr iedm an

62- Taliah Soleym an i

20- Sh ir a Coh en

63- Rebecca Qu in t as

21- Sar a Rich t er

64-65- Kelly Sh apir o

22-23- Teh illa David

66-67- M olly Jacobson

24-25- Rebecca Fr iedm an

68-69- Sar a Rich t er

26-27- Rach el Neu m an

70-71- Sh osh an a Bar -M eir

28-29- Sh osh an a Bar -M eir

72-73- Pelah Coh en

30-31- Kelly Sh apir o

74-75- Tova Kah an

32- Sar a Rich t er , Or iya Falk , Kelly Sh apir o

76-77- Adin a M at t en

33- Taliah Soleym an i

78-81- M olly Jacobson

34- Kelly Sh apir o

82-83- Taliah Soleym an i

35- M olly Jacobson

84-85- Kelly Sh apir o

36-37- Tova Olif f

86- M olly St ein

38- M olly St ein

87- Sh ir a Coh en

39- Joey Gr een ber g

88-89- Nech am a Car lsen

40- M olly Jacobson

90-91-Sar a Rich t er

41- Taliah Soleym an i

97-Or iya Falk

42-43 - Tam ar Ch avel

96

96

98--Kelly Sh apir o

97

97

98

98