Freaky Friday Upends the Lake Students and Teachers Switch Places from New Disease

BY DARIUS LEWIS

During fourth period, at 11:11am on Friday the 13th, the school fell into anarchy when a freak accident occured causing students and teachers to switch places.

The event is called “the Freaky Friday incident” caused by the newly discovered Neocerebrumitus. This condition switches the minds of Wilde Lake High School staff and students. Scientists hypothesize that this was caused by bacteria in the water supply from the water fountains.

Former Student Member of the Board Abisola Ayoola has taken a liking to her new position as acting principal, replacing Ms. Leonard. “I was basically running the county anyways, so nothing really changed,” she said.

Some of the teachers are also enjoying being able to relive their adolescence.

“I feel 20 years younger,” said Coach Wingfield after swapping bodies with senior Dylan Gooden.

While Coach Wingfield seems pleased with his refound youth, other former staff members are not so accepting of their new state.

The new student body and their new student bodies are planning a protest citing the “excessive workload” for causing them emotional distress.

Some of the English teachers, now students, admitted to using ChatGPT to finish homework.

One former teacher who asked to remain anonymous said that she has “gained a new perspective on homework.” government.”

“When things go back to normal, if they ever do, I’m permanently getting rid of homework,” she said after submitting another essay ChatGPT wrote for her.

But some of the switches did not result in negative experiences.

Mr. Wallace, a History teacher, switched bodies with known Theater kid and SGA associate Nick Shidle, and insanity ensued.

“I went to bed normally,” Nick explained. “All of a sudden, I woke up with a blond ponytail and an excessive knowledge of the U.S.

Mr. Wallace, on the other hand, says he had “the most relaxing time” once he lost his celebrity status.

“I can finally go a day without someone screaming my name from across Main Street or calling me Mr. Walrus,” he said.

Unfortunately for some, the cure for Neocerebrumitus is still unknown.

Principal Ms. Ayoola says the administration is collaborating with health departments nationwide to “mitigate this situation.”

“Sure, I test the chemical levels or whatever, but it’s not like I know what they mean,” said the lifeguard.

President Fisher asked Science teacher Dr. Poole to do a pH reading. The results were “so extraordinarily abnormal” that Dr. Poole said they “didn’t even show up on the monitor.”

Vice President Dolphin says that the lack of attention from the lifeguards is putting the club at risk. “Without this pool, our five members have nowhere to practice,” said Dolphin while drying his light green hair after practice. “The meet is in a week. We can’t practice in a pool that is the same color as Kermit, the frog.”

Despite the challenges, the club says they plan to take their practices a few blocks over to Wilde Lake, where local officials have permitted the club to hold practices before sunrise and after sunset so as to not disturb residents.

“It’s the best we can do,” said President Fisher. “In all honesty, it’s better than what we usually swim in, and the marine life keeps us company.”

According to Dr. Poole, the water in Wilde Lake is “considerably cleaner” than that of the fourth-floor pool. “This is really astonishing, considering I’m pretty sure some of the fish have three eyes.”

Micheal says that this solution will likely work best for the club and “carry us to victory” at the meet, in five days.

For the time being, Wilde Lake will have to host swim meets in the Lake. As for the pool, administration has allowed the environmental club to “restore biodiversity.”