Wire Magazine Issue #18, 2011: Celebrity Autobiography

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ISSUE #18 | 05/05/11

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ALL WIRED UP

BY THOMAS BARKER

A SUMMER OF FUN With the arrival of the summer comes the idea that there will pretty much be nothing to do except run from one airconditioned oasis to the next. I know that is how I used to feel; however, I have recently learned that is certainly not the case this year.

Over the next few very humid months, there seems to be a plethora of art events, theater productions, dance parties, and, of course, our favorite seven-day-a-week gay bar’s anniversary celebrations!

This week, we decided to dedicate our cover story to a must-see show that will make its Miami premiere at the Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts this weekend – Celebrity Autobiography. Created and developed by Emmy Award-nominated writer-performer Eugene Pack and Dayle Reyfel, who are also part of the stellar cast, the show delivers juicy and unbelievably outrageous passages from the actual memoirs of celebrities, including Britney Spears, Tiger Woods, and even Justin Bieber, among many others.

In my interview with creator Eugene Pack and Saturday Night Live star and Celebrity Autobiography actor Rachel Dratch I learned that the show is not about making fun of the actors; instead, it’s about picking pieces of these celebrities’ memoirs that are completely funny on their own. “…this is NOT a show about making fun of celebrities,” says Eugene. “It is a commentary on why everyone writes their memoir, at any age… whether it’s Miley Cyrus, Da-

vid Hasselhoff, or Elizabeth Taylor. It is not a mean spirited show. When the material is performed, it is done in a very fun, unique way - not ‘making fun”.

The show will actually run from May 5th to May 15th at the Arsht Center and include a number of celebrity appearances, including Sex and the City’s fabulous Mario Cantone, Burn Notice star, and former Miami Beach Gay Pride Grand Marshall, Sharon Gless, Desperate Housewives’ Rocker Bart, and Celebrity Four Square’s Bruce Valanch, among many others.

Just check out the sidebar in the cover story to get the inside scoop on all the famous faces that will grace the stage during Celebrity Autobiography.

Now beyond this amazing production, The Arsht Center will also feature some campy fun productions to keep you entertained throughout the summer months, including their super-hilarious production of Summer Shorts. Stay tuned to Wire Magazine for more details on what’s happening at the Arsht Center.

Of course, no summer would be complete without the annual birthday celebration of two of my favorite gay bars and clubs – Score and TWIST! In the latter part of June, TWIST will celebrate 18 years of doing business in South Beach, making it the longest running gay bar and club in Miami Beach and certainly the most legendary!

Every year, TWIST dedicates a ton a money and time to revamping, remodeling, and upgrading the seven different

bars that make up the smorgasbord of entertainment, and I have been told that we will see some pretty exciting additions to the already fabulous space. I’ve been sworn to secrecy, so mums the word… well, at least for now.

One thing I will say for sure is that TWIST’s Anniversary Party is one of the most scandalous nights of the summer, as VIPs, drag queens, social fixtures, fashionitas, club kids, bar flies, international DJs, and everything in between will be in attendance, sipping on the endless supply of premium cocktails and toasting to Richard Trainor and Joel Stedman as they celebrate such a momentous occasion!

Gay nightlife in South Beach would certainly not be complete without Lincoln Road’s only gay dance club, Score.

For close to 13 years, Score has provided locals and out of towners alike with a one-of-a-kind dance experience. International DJs paired with a state of the art light and sound system has made Score THE place to dance your ass off in South Florida!

On July 17th, Score will celebrate its 13th Anniversary by inviting local VIPs to enjoy an open bar and move to the beats of international DJs at what is always a sensational event!

In closing, I’d also like to let everyone know that Summerfest ’11 is right around the corner, and we will be announcing that date in the next couple of weeks, so stay tuned!

Till next week!

COVER PHOTOS PROVIDED BY: ARSHT CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS

WIRE STAFF CEO/PUBLISHER: rafa carvajal

EXECUTIVE EDITOR/PUBLISHER: thomas barker DESIGN DIRECTOR/PRODUCTION: jose gonzalez/true ink designs l.l.c.

COLUMNISTS/WRITERS: alfredo barrios james cubby dr. gregg pizzi michael sasser PHOTOGRAPHERS + ILLUSTRATORS: john anthony sutton | image1stmiami.com juan saco mironoff | miami-gay-blog.com dale stine | dalestine.com henry perez | henry1dj@bellsouth.net rob davidson | rob@wireweekly.com WIRE MAGAZINE IS PUBLISHED, PRODUCED AND OWNED BY WIRE MEDIA GROUP L.L.C. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

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PUBLIShER'S corNer

PUBLISHERS’ CORNER

wow! iT’S BeeN A yeAr? JoiN wire mA

“GERONIMO EKIA.” WE FINALLY GOT HIM!

All of us have a handful of moments in our lives that are vividly edged in our minds. Three of these moments for me were turning points in the history of the United States. I will never forget where I was and what I was doing, when I heard that President Reagan had been shot, when I witnessed live on television the crash of United Airlines Flight 175 into the World Trade Center South Tower, and when I learned that Osama bin Laden had been killed by a member of Navy SEALs Team 6, who delivered justice for all the innocent people murdered on September 11, 2001 with an American double tap heard around the world.

My first reaction was to celebrate out loud and yell, “We finally got the son of a bitch!”

Then I remember saying, “justice at last for all the innocent people killed on September 11.” I honestly felt really good that members of our intelligence services and our magnificent and brave special operations forces had finally been able to accomplish a mission 10 years in the making and report live to the White House Situation Room “Geronimo EKIA!”

This week and last week have probably been the busiest weeks ever for Thomas and I working on wire magazine.

Why? For a couple of very good reasons: We have been working very hard on producing our second ever Pride collector’s edition of wire magazine – that we think you Geronimo was the code name given to bin Laden and EKIA is the abbreviation for Enemy Killed In Action used by SEALs Team 6 to report that their mission had been will enjoyaccomplished reading through. In accomplished. With those words the Unitedreally States of America its mission to kill or capture the terrorist who decided to murder almost 3,000 innocent people on a beautiful, sunny September morning that came to be known as the most dition, we have also been working non-stop on the first ever horrific single day in American history. It is also sweet justice that the last thing Osama bin Laden saw before rotting in hell was the face of an American service member deficial Gay Pride Pool livering justice in the name of all his fellow citizens. Party, which Wire magazine The “waron on terror” is not over yet, butApril a huge step17th has been taken prosecuting it to l host Saturday, at inthe hotel Victor with its final conclusion. I also have no doubt that the treasure trove of intelligence collected during the raid on bin Laden’s safe house in Abbottabad, Pakistan will accelernlandia Vodka and as sponsors. ate our intelligence services, military, and herradura special opps’ ability to reachTequila out and kill or capture many other top al-Qaeda members, including Ayman al-Zawahiri, bin Ladin’s right hand man. Just like Adolf Hitler, the only way to defeat these murderous thugs is to kill or capture them. That will be done and the war on terror will eventually end, just like World War II eventually came to a conclusion.

eally is hard to believe that a year has already gone by since we President Obama and his National Security Team should be commended for getting the job done. is clear that PODUSCollector’s was decisive in the approach to accomblished the firstIt ever Pride Edition of Wire magazine, plish this mission in a way that would leave no doubt that our nation’s most wanted enemy was defeated. The President could have chosen a less risky option with drones that is missiles, definitely the case.

Pride is once again or cruise but he chose instead to pursue an alternative with a verifiable out- taking place in come. It was also brilliant to quickly bury bin Laden at sea, leaving no physical place for him to be revered this by his followers. ami Beach Saturday and we hope that all our readers in I am also particularly happy for the people of New York. I lived in Battery Park ami Fort will aDirector chance to enjoy this City, and in the shadow of thelauderdale Twin Towers, and my office, as thehave Executive of the Costa Rican Investment Board, was located at 90 West Street, one small2010 Greek church away from the World Trade Center.

Osama binWe Laden managed ek’s Pride Collector’s Edition. couldn’t have gotten to destroy a wonderful part of New York City, but he paid the ultimate price for doing so at the hands of a United States Navy SEAL! re without all your support, and the support of our advertisers, Have a wonderful week and feel free to stop us on the streets of Miami, the Beaches, and Fort Lauderdale share your thoughtsof andthe ideas Wire with Wire Magazine. onsors, and all theto members staff. Thanks very much Rafa everyone for helping us make this possible!

For The Publishers Rafa Carvajal: rafa@wireweekly.com Thomas Barker: thomas@wireweekly.com

e also hope that you will be able to participate in the 6 | wire magazine | follow wire on facebook & twitter: visit www.wireweekly.com & click on the icons ide festivities on Saturday, plus many of the ancillary

events and parties taking p parade, Expo, and day of why we are including a co can use as your map of wh and times to be there.

We also want to extend welcome you to join us for t Pool Party at the hotel V decided to put together a year’s Pride, courtesy of W have fun in the company complement the Parade, Ex main stages of Pride, and for some additional fun at from 1 p.m. to 7 p.m. thi miik will be spinning, complimentary Finlandia v ticket purchase.

make sure to stop by our your copy of this week’s sp contest, but definitely stop hotel Victor to celebrate Pr pool party. We will be cam some additional fun in the

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NEWS AND VIEWS

LABOR DEPT. ADDS GENDER IDENTITY TO EQUAL EMPLOYMENT POLICY The U.S. Department of Labor recently announced its full commitment to implementing equal employment opportunity policies for all department employees and applicants. The policies ensure equal protections for all employees and applicants regardless of race; color; religion; national origin; sex, including pregnancy and gender identity; age; disability, whether physical or mental; genetic information; status as a parent; sexual orientation; or other nonmerit factors. New, robust statements signed by Secretary Solis include updated policies on prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sex, including gender identity and pregnancy.

Secretary Solis strongly supports fair equal employment opportunity policies, and creating diversity and fairness in the workplace.

“I am expressing my personal commitment to ensure that the U.S. Department of Labor is a model workplace, free from unlawful discrimination and harassment, which fosters a work environment that fully utilizes the capabilities of every employee,” said Secretary Solis. “It is my goal that we achieve and maintain a high-quality, diverse workforce at all organizational levels throughout the department.”

The Labor Department is required to issue annual written policy statements expressing the secretary’s commitment to equal employment opportunity and a workplace free of discriminatory harassment, pursuant to 29 Code of Federal Regulations Part 1614, Federal Sector Equal Employment Opportunity, and the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission’s Management Directive 715. The EEOC’s directive identifies minimum requirements for the policy statements.

The statements issued by Secretary Solis articulate stronger protections and establish responsibilities to ensure meaningful adherence to equal employment opportunity throughout the department. They have been disseminated to all current employees and will be disseminated to new employees during orientation as well as to employees who are promoted into supervisory ranks.

INTERNATIONAL YOUNG DANCER’S FESTIVAL ARRIVES Arts Ballet Theatre of Florida, under the Direction of Vladimir Issaev, is welcoming more than 60 dancers from different countries, who along with 40 local dancers will participate in the VIII International Young Dancers Festival.

Mexico; Escuela Nacional Superior de Ballet from Peru; and the Ballet “Pirouette” from Germany. Special guests include dancer Yoshie Oshima, formerly with Arts Ballet Theatre of Florida and now with Eugene Ballet, Pianist Waldo Diaz, and Cellist Michael Andrews, who will be accompanying ballerina Lisa Maltseva, member of Arts Ballet Theatre of Florida, formerly with the Mariinsky Ballet (Kirov).

The festival will include Master Classes in different styles of dance, from Ballet, to Modern, Character dance, Israeli dances, and Flamenco, and a series of lectures and conferences about dance aimed at dance students and professions alike. The Festival will culminate with three performances of three different programs.

This is not a competitive festival but a thrilling international dance festival by excellent troupes that are enthusiastic about sharing the excitement of their culture.

These performances are alive, with top-notch dancers with a very impressive program. They eagerly absorb our culture while staying with gracious host families.

You will be sure to find their enthusiasm on stage contagious and exciting.

The dancing groups will bring an eclectic repertoire: from Classical Ballet, including pieces such as excerpts of Romeo and Juliet, The Nutcracker, Les Patineurs, Diana & Acteon, Paquita, Don Quixote, Markitanka, Pas de Dix from Esmeralda; to a wide range of trends between Contemporary pieces, such as Piazzola’s Style by Natteri, and Modern pieces from Poland and Denmark, and a beautiful showcase of Folkloric pieces from Mexico, Peru, and Polish Folk dances.

Additionally to Arts Ballet Theatre of Florida the participants groups are Ballet Fouette from Poland; Odense City Ballet from Denmark; Michiko Matsumoto Ballet from Japan; Ballet Doris Topete from Guadalajara,

With the support of the Miami Dade County Department of Cultural Affairs, the Broward County Cultural Division, and individual donors, Arts Ballet Theatre of Florida invites you to attend this celebration of music and dance and share their heritage and culture.

Performances will take place on Friday, May 13 at 7:30 p.m. at the Aventura Arts & Cultural Center, Saturday, May 14 at 7 p.m. at the Julius Littman Theater in North Miami Beach, and Sunday, May 15 at 3 p.m. at the Broward Center in Fort Lauderdale. Tickets are only $25. For information, you can call 305.948.4777 or go to their website www.artsballettheatre.org

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HAVEN GASTRO-LOUNGE OPENS IN SOBE Super chic new Gastro Lounge Haven is set to bring its mix of cutting-edge design, international cuisine, and creative cocktails to South Beach’s busiest business district with its opening May 6, 2011. The most recent project by hospitality designer and tech-savvy entrepreneur Mike Boles will be located at 1237 Lincoln Road (next to Altamare) and will feature stateof-the-art sight and sound installations while still retaining a warmth and accessibility he believes will appeal to both locals and out-of-towners.

Once inside Haven, guests are welcomed by a black beach pebble water wall that leads into the 120-person venue. The focal point of the intimate space is a custom-designed open kitchen and chef’s counter, which offers diners front-row seats to the inventive food preparation by local celeb chef in the making, Todd Erickson.

Executive chef Erickson, whose cooking style reflects his passion for travel and regional cuisine, is a graduate of the Culinary Institute of America and boasts more than 10 years of kitchen experience that already includes recognition from the Dallas Observer as the “Best Chef Under 30” and a “Number One Young Gun Chef” nod by D Magazine. Most recently, he served as executive sous chef at Zuma Miami.

Some of the dishes we are excited to experience include the Dandelion Salad with mixed citrus supremes, Medjool dates, pistachios, fennel and sherry vinaigrette ($8); Crackle-Pop, spicy tuna and pickled daikon rolled in seared and crisped rice and painted with yuzu-shichimi aioli ($14); and the “Duck Duck” Quail Slider, in-house ground duck burger topped with quail egg, foie gras butter and served with parsley-shallot salad ($11).

Haven is the first South Florida venture by Boles, who plans to expand the concept to other cities domestically and abroad. He will offer a variety of specialty evenings to include artists spinning house, retro, reggae, indie, and other progressive sounds.

“My passion for designing and building unique venues is rewarded by creating a truly special experience and witnessing the customer’s reaction to it,” he says. The Georgia native previously helped revitalize Atlanta’s West Side by creating hip, modern nightlife venues such as the multi-use, high-tech Compound and Luckie Food Lounge, both regarded as Atlanta’s favorite celebrity hangouts.

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DISCOTEKKA SATURDAY NIGHTS PHOTOS BY JUAN SACO MIRONOFF

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CLUB SUGAR PRESENTS SHANGELA LIVE! DIRECT FROM RUPAUL’S DRAG RACE PHOTOS BY JUAN SACO MIRONOFF

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WIRE COVER: CELEBRITY AUTOBIOGRAPHY: A SMORGASBORD OF CELEBRITY BYTES!

er

By Thomas Bark

By: Photos Provided g Arts r the Performin fo r te n e C t h rs A

In a multi-media world driven by pop culture, it is no wonder that so many people are fascinated by the glamorous and scandalous lives of celebrities. From Britney Spears having a radical breakdown to Lindsay Lohan’s drug abuse and regular court appearances, we are beyond obsessed with these people!

This Thursday, May 5th to Sunday, May 15th Miami will get a fresh dose of celebrity juiciness at the Adrienne Arsht Center for the Performing Arts with the arrival of the smash-hit comedy Celebrity Autobiography, an evening of jaw-dropping, hard-to-believe vignettes excerpted straight from actual celebrity tell-alls and performed by a first-rate comedic ensemble and special guest stars that have included Ryan Reynolds, Brooke Shields, Sherri Shepherd, and more!

Hailed by The New York Post as “the funniest show in town, hands down,” Celebrity Autobiography has become the must-see show in Los Angeles, New York, and Chicago. The show has been known to have surprise celebrity guests, and stars already slated for the first week of the Miami run include “Saturday Night Live” funny lady Rachel Dratch, Tony-nominated actor and comedian Mario Cantone (beloved for his role as wedding planner extraordinaire on “Sex and the City”), and acclaimed multiple Emmy Award-winning TV and stage actress Sharon Gless.

For week two of Celebrity Autobiography, Sharon, featured on the popular TV series “Burn Notice” and recently seen in the Miami production of “Round-Heeled Woman” at Gable Stage to rave reviews, is joined by Broadway and TV star Roger Bart, most recently seen as the menacing dentist on ABC’s “Desperate Housewives,” and acclaimed for his laugh-out-loud comedic performances in the Broadway musicals The Producers and Young Frankenstein.

Created and developed by Emmy Award-nominated writer-performer Eugene Pack and Dayle Reyfel, who are also part of the stellar cast, Celebrity Autobiography delivers juicy and unbelievably outrageous passages from the actual memoirs of celebrities - the ‘he-said, she-said’ accounts of Burt and Loni, Tiger Woods’ “golf lessons,” the re-enactment of Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson’s courtship, and even a hilarious ensemble “playlet” edited together from the memoirs of the most famous love triangle in Hollywood history—Elizabeth Taylor, Debbie Reynolds, and Eddie Fisher.

Madonna, Justin Bieber, Mr. T, Suzanne Somers, and Britney Spears are among the other celebrities whose revelatory tomes are often featured in the show. Everyone gets their “fifteen minutes” in Celebrity Autobiography, even audience members, who are invited to participate in each show.

With such an exciting new production hitting the stage at the Arsht Center, there was just no way I could resist sitting down with creator, Eugene Pack to learn more about the show.

I was also lucky enough to snag an interview with one of my favorite Saturday Night Live performers, Rachel Dratch! Rachel joined the cast of SNL in 1999 where she performed for seven years, creating memorable characters including Boston teen “Denise,” the “Lovers” professors with Will Ferrell, junior 12 | wire magazine | follow wire on facebook & twitter: visit www.wireweekly.com & click on the icons

WIRE COVER: CELEBRITY AUTOBIOGRAPHY: A SMORGASBORD OF CELEBRITY BYTES!

high school student “Sheldon,” and “Debbie Downer.”

She wrote and performed in the two-person sketch show “Dratch and Fey” with SNL co-star Tina Fey.

You’ve had some incredible stars pop in for surprise appearances. Who has been the most outlandish?

She alone is one hell of a reason to check out this show!

Check out what the two had to say to me!

Everyone brings their own one of a kind sensibility to the material. Some of our regular performers come to mind - Kristen Johnston reading Loni Anderson has to be experienced, Sherri Shepherd as Beyoncé, and Rachel Dratch as one of the Jonas Bros. They have all really had the audience howling.

EUGENE PACK What is the concept of the show?

Which celebrity memoires will you be featuring?

Tiger Woods, Britney Spears, Justin Bieber, Burt and Loni, Jonas Bros, Star Jones, Vanna White, Cher, Elizabeth Taylor/Debbie Reynolds/Eddie Fisher, Hasselhoff, and Ivana Trump, just to name a few.

Can you summarize what people will experience during this year’s production?

In one piece, we have someone from the audience get up to participate in one of the segments! We are bringing some of the funniest people to perform, and we are doing our “best of” pieces. This show is a full theatrical experience, not just “readings”. We have a series of solo performances, but then we have these epic pieces I understand you’ve received a lot of accolades we call Celebrity Mash-Ups where we throw books toWhat inspired you to create this production? for this production. Why do you think the show gether--like Tommy Lee and Sylvester Stallone --then we has been so well received? have the “he said she said” with Eddie Fisher/Elizabeth Taylor/Debbie Reynolds. They all have their own disYears ago in LA, I came across the book “Vanna Speaks” -- a hardcover memoir by Vanna White. I The bottom line is that everyone that comes to see it has tinct point of view about their famous Hollywood love flipped through it and was fascinated on the chapter the best time. There is something in it that appeals to triangle. Plus, we have a piece where three celebs are going on about their favorite foods in detail. All I can where she writes about how challenging it is to flip the everyone. It’s an evening with a lot of surprises say is be prepared to laugh! panels on the Wheel of Fortune. I read it out loud to myself in all seriousness and thought—“wow! What if How did you get the celebrities involved in RACHEL DRATCH this material was read in front of an audience?” I asked making fun of other celebrities? a bunch of performers to find an autobiography pasHow did you first get involved with Celebrity sage to read, and we found a space and put on this full That’s the thing - this is NOT a show about making fun Autobiography? evening as a fun experiment. It was a big hit instantly of celebrities. It is a commentary on why everyone writes and kept building. The show keeps changing and new their memoir, at any age… whether it’s Miley Cyrus, Da- I’ve been in it for a couple years now. I think the casting people keep participating. It is really a big hit with au- vid Hasselhoff, or Elizabeth Taylor. It is not a mean spir- director for the show just tapped a few SNL people. diences, and is now running in New York, Los Angeles, ited show. When the material is performed, it is done in They like to use a variety of actors from all different and London. Each of the shows is different too! a very fun, unique way - not “making fun”. areas for the show.

We perform from the actual memoirs and books written by celebrities. These are books that were written NOT to be “funny”, but when you perform them in front of an audience it all takes on a new meaning. It is hilarious...”found comedy”!

Mario Cantone is off the charts when he reads Justin Bieber. Ryan Reynolds, Rosie Perez, Jennifer Tilly, Brooke Shields, and Florence Henderson reading Mr T. The list is endless.

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WIRE COVER: CELEBRITY AUTOBIOGRAPHY: A SMORGASBORD OF CELEBRITY BYTES!

Celebrity Autobiography Opening Night

What attracted you to this show?

We were originally doing the show once a week in New York City and it was a fun thing to just drop in and do. You don’t have to prepare much for it because you are just reading from the book. But as time goes by, you find little bits and areas that you know work well. Also, there is a core group that does the show but there’s always someone new dropping in so that keeps it fresh.

Can you give us a little hint as to who you will be playing?

I usually do Joan Lunden and one of the Jonas Bros.

My favorite one is that Burt Reynolds wrote an autobiography and Loni Anderson wrote one too, but a little known fact is that Burt Reynolds’ secretary also wrote one, so I like playing her.

What are you most looking forward to while performing in Miami?

I think I’ve only spent a night or two there ever, so I’ve never really been there for any length of time.

I always like checking out a new city. Also, it’s currently still cold here in New York City so I’m looking forward to some warmth!

How do your past roles play into what you will be doing on stage?

They don’t really, except for my comedy background.

I have been involved in sketch and improv for many

years now - first at Second City in Chicago and then at SNL. I guess that helps you find what to do when faced with these autobios!

You have some pretty hysterical people joining you on stage. Anything outrageous happen during rehearsals?

Rehearsals? What rehearsals? No! As I said, it’s kind of a rotating group, so when someone comes in new they are prepped by the director individually.

We don’t rehearse as a group. Again, we have the books right in front of us and we are standing at a mike so it’s kind of up to the individual performer how they want to approach their piece, but that’s what keeps things new.

Which celebrity - and which time in their life - would you love to reenact on stage and why?

For the most part, we aren’t impersonating the celeb.

We might try to capture their energy or throw a slight voice on it, but for the most part the material is best served by just reading what’s there pretty straight and let the material do the work. So I don’t have someone in mind at this point.

What are you currently working on?

Well, this might get me a big karma kickback, but I’m actually writing my own book! Hopefully it won’t be read in the show someday.

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WIRE COVER: CELEBRITY AUTOBIOGRAPHY

MEET THE STARS OF CELEBRITY AUTOBIOGRAPHY

BRUNCHIC @ PALACE EVERY SUNDAY PHOTOS BY JUAN SACO MIRONOFF

MARIO CANTONE

Known for his role of wedding planner extraordinaire on “Sex and the City,” Mario Cantone is also a celebrated New York stage actor and stand-up comedian who gained critical acclaim for his Tony-nominated one-man show Laugh Whore.

SHARON GLESS

Multiple Emmy and Golden Globe Award-winner, Sharon Gless recently received her 10th Primetime Emmy Award nomination for her portrayal of the chain-smoking, obsessive mother Madeline Westen on USA Network’s “Burn Notice,” the highest-rated cable series in the country. Most notably, Sharon starred in “Cagney & Lacey” for which she earned two Emmys, a Golden Globe, and six Emmy nominations. Sharon is also recognized as the outrageous and beloved Debbie Novotny in the groundbreaking Showtime series “Queer as Folk.” In 1995, Sharon was honored with a star on the Walk of Fame.

ROGER BART

Stage and screen actor most recently recognized for his role on ABC’s “Desperate Housewives,” Roger Bart is a Tony and Drama Desk Award Winner for Best Featured Actor in a Musical for his role as “Snoopy” in the revival of You’re a Good Man, Charlie Brown directed by Michael Mayer.

BRUCE VILANCH

A six-time Emmy Award winner, Bruce Vilanch is an American comedy writer, songwriter and actor, known for in his role on “Hollywood Squares.” An accomplished writer, Bruce has written 21 Academy Award broadcasts and numerous Tony, Grammy, and Emmy Award shows. Bruce has starred as “Edna Turnblad” in the musical Hairspray. He has recently been seen on VH1’s popular “Celebrity Fit Club” and in his one-man off-Broadway show Almost Famous.

CADY HUFFMAN

A Tony Award-winning American stage and film actress, Cady Huffman is also known for her role as a regular judge for the Food Network’s “Iron Chef America.” Appearing in numerous Broadway productions, including La Cage aux Folles, Big Deal, Steel Pier, Dame Edna: the Royal Tour and The Will Rogers Follies, Huffman was honored with a Tony Award for Best Performance by a Featured Actress in a Musical for her role as “Ulla” in The Producers

PAUL PROVENZA

Celebrated comedian, actor and filmmaker, Paul Provenza directed the critically acclaimed film The Aristocrats and is the star and creator of the current Showtime series “The Green Room.” He was nominated for two CableACE Awards for his ground-breaking Comedy Central talk show “Comics Only” and has appeared as a comedian on “The Tonight Show,” “Late Night with David Letterman,” “The Jon Stewart Show,” and many more.

CRAIG BIERKO

Known for his role as Max Baer in the Academy Award-nominated feature film “Cinderella Man,” Craig Bierko is a Tony-nominated stage and screen actor. Craig has starred in various Broadway productions including the Tony-nominated Guys & Dolls, Modern Orthodox, To Be Or Not To Be opposite Jan Maxwell and in the role of “Harold Hill” in The Music Man, for which he was nominated for a Tony Award.

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BRUNCHIC @ PALACE EVERY SUNDAY PHOTOS BY JUAN SACO MIRONOFF

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TOP TRAX: JEI KEEPS IT REAL

by DJ FR8-O Photo by Henry Perez Hair and make-up by Jorge Zabaleta Dress by Leiluna Collection It’s a steamy Saturday night and I’m making my way down a packed Collins Avenue to one of South Beach’s hottest clubs, Rokbar. I can hear the beat pulsating inside as my host Michael M welcomes me through the velvet ropes and into the wild night ahead. Suddenly I’m surrounded by familiar faces and old friends, but they’re not here to see me. Like me, they came to celebrate the birth of Miami’s newest local recording artist and soon-to-befamous reality TV star, Jei.

Where do you find your inspiration?

What other projects do you have coming up?

I find my inspiration in the crowds at nightclubs that understand what dance music is all about - what music is really all about. I love it when I get people singing along to my songs. That inspires me more than anything.

In July, my single “Show Me The Money” with Giuseppe D will drop on Sky Music. It’s the new “Material Girl” for 2011! I also just finished shooting a reality show. I can’t say yet where or when it will air, but I will definitely be the one to watch!

Like so many of us in the club music biz, Jei was mesmerized by the sounds of the South Beach club scene of the early 90s, but this Cuban-American club kid didn’t want to be just another face in the crowd; she wanted to be the voice that moved it. Jei has been signing almost her entire life and over the years has performed in some of Miami’s top dance clubs. It wasn’t until she joined forces with the superstar circuit duo, Ralph Falcon and Oscar G (aka Murk) that her dream of becoming a recording artist finally came true.

Oh wow! How can I explain 10 years in the making? I was 19 and Edgar V, a very well known DJ and close friend, had introduced Oscar to me at an event. I met Ralph in 2006 through another DJ, Charlie Solana. At the time, I was signed to a label, so we weren’t able to work together. But Ralph always kept me in mind. Fast forward to 4th of July 2010. I went to see Ralph spin at a gay event with my manager and close friend Michael M. While we were there, Ralph told me he had a song in mind for me. We hooked up again a few weeks later and “Amame” was born. Oscar and Ralph have opened a huge door to my career, and I am so very grateful to them.

You may not know who she is now, but in a few short months anyone with a TV and an addiction to reality shows will know her name. I hooked up with Jei just before her ‘Fierce and Fabulous’ birthday bash to get the 411 on her new single “Amame” (Love Me), her reality TV debut, and what America can expect to see and hear from her this summer.

When did you decide you wanted to be a recording artist?

When I was five years old I grabbed the microphone at an elementary school function and sang “Allaru”, which is “The Lullaby Song” in Spanish. I got a standing ovation for my performance and that’s when I knew I was going to be a recording artist.

Do you write your own songs?

Yes, I can write my own songs, but at the moment I am getting inspiration from other writers and getting influenced by the music itself.

How did you get hooked up with producers Oscar G and Ralph Falcon (aka Murk)?

When and where can we get your music?

“Amame” is not available yet, but you can pre-order the 12” vinyl now at HMV.COM. I also have another song with Christian Falero called “Enlevez Moi” that was just released on Blu Music this week. That one is available at Beatport.com.

Will you be performing anywhere soon?

I just performed “Amame” for the first time at Tropicasa last week to promote the upcoming release. Every Wednesday Oscar G, Ralph Falcon, Lazaro Casanova, and the Tropicasa Band put together this great party with a cool vibe called “Hoy Como Ayer.” I perform at many different venues though, so just hit me up at Facebook. com/jeimusic to find out where I’ll be next.

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Tell us about your craziest showbiz experience so far?

Well, I’m pretty crazy as it is. I think the craziest showbiz experience so far has been me in the making. I have done a lot of crazy things recently that will be seen by many people very soon, so you’ll have to stay tuned to see the crazy come out.

Is there any advice you’d like to give to all the aspiring singers out there?

Don’t give up on your dreams! Don’t let anyone tell you it can’t happen or “It’s just a hobby. That’s not a real job.”

Do what you love every day and make it happen! I also want to give a HUGE thank you to Joey Rolon, Sparkling Eyes Make Up, Oscar G, Ralph Falcon, David Orth, Michael M, Jorge Zabaleta, and Leiluna Collection for all their love and support throughout this crazy journey!

WHERE’S DJ FR8-O? VINYL MONDAYS

The Betsy Hotel 1440 Ocean Drive, Miami Beach 9 p.m. / No Cover

§ If you’re a recording artist, musician or producer and would like your work featured on TOP TRAX, hit me up at alfredo@wireweekly.com

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Food 11Th @STreeT DiNer 11th Street Diner 660 THE ANGLERS

Corner StreetAve., andWashington Washington Ave.,MB 660 Washington MB | 305.534.9600 11th Street and Ave., The new Winter menu highlights MB 305.534.6373 305.534.6373 Contemporary American withdiner a fewcuisine, MedArray ofofhome-style American array home-style american diner inspired appetizers share like the highly from meatloaf friedtochicken.

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516 MB | 305.538.4484 with free WiFiWay throughout. a LaEspanola FoLie

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A more café-like in its Washington offerings classic 305.534.6373 very casual, friendly lounge with competent, French crepes, sandwiches, salads, and Array of home-style American diner knowledgeable wait staff. no need lounge to rush platters. from a very casual, cuisine, meatloaf tofriendly fried chicken. here!

French, after all!prix Sit, fixe relax, peruse with competent, knowledgeable wait Daily It’s specials and great menu for the over a glass of staff.numerous no needperiodicals to rush it’s French, only $12.99.

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933 Lincoln Road,knowledgeable MB | 305.695.8898 with competent, wait staff.

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It’s French, after all! anDiamo & Books has that sets apart from any other Sit, relax, peruse the itnumerous periodicals 5600 Biscayne Blvd.,Miami | 305.762.5751 over a glass of Pouilly Fumé or seven-year-old pizzeria thata Stella has

expanded outdoor seating with video screens and complimentary wi-fi.

Gourmet pizza is award winning and nationally recognized! additional italian menu selections include paninis, salads, soups, desserts. serves beer and wine. now serving Frankie’s philly cheese steaks! caFé at BookS & BookS

933 Lincoln Road, MB | 305.695.8898

one of the most important things that books & books has that sets it apart from any other chain bookstore is a wonderful personality. not only can you find the latest books and coolest magazines, now you can enjoy truly delicious and generous food in one of the most relaxed environments possible on Lincoln road. the food is really quite something, especially their miami cheese steak sandwich.

Da Leo trattoria

819 Lincoln Road, MB | 305.674.0350

one of the pioneers of Lincoln road, da Leo is popular spot with locals, tourists, and celebrities. Where else could you enjoy rich, tasty food, which is basic home-style pastas and meat dishes, and some of the best people-watching while dining al fresco. ask about their special prix fixe menus – one at $15.95 and

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1418 Ocean Drive, | 305.531.8300 Not can of you find the latest books After only 17 years serving South Beach localsand the coolest magazines, now you canportions, enjoy freshest, impeccable meals in generous truly delicious and generous food in one this restaurant has nothing to prove. It’s the best of the most relaxed environments possible for casual fare at any time, but especially for on Lincoln Road. The food is really quite their breakfasts.

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819 Lincoln Road, MB | 305.674.0350 Da Leo hosts it’s very popular Bubbly Brunch Joey’S every Sunday.

This Miami year’s | selections are 2506 NW 2nd Ave., tantalizing and delightful under the careful 305.438.0488 watch Marcos.

Enjoy Swing of byManaging this new Director artsy Italian eatery for pancakes, French toast, Italian and more, some incredibly authentic nibblesplus as all you can drink champagne for $32 per chef Ivo takes you on a culinary journey person, with alla carte menu options. Da through the Veneto region of Italy. The mista Leo is a popular spot with locals, tourists, salad celebrities is a great way to kick your meal and and who loveofftheir delicious the spaghetti alle vongole – spaghetti with food, complemented by some of the best mussels – or the butter beef tenderloin people-watching while flied dining al fresco on are two Road. tasty dishes to enjoy as an entrée.

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445 Espanola Way, MB | 305.420.5809

brazil’s most well known Japanese brazilian restaurant concept is now in miami beach, and offering an assortment of delicious Kones, sushi rolls, sakes, and salads. swing by for sake-bomb Fridays starting nov. 20th at 6 p.m. for $5 sake-bombs and free sushi.

La SanDwicherie

229 14th St., MB | 305.532.8934

sandwiches and salads along with fruit smoothies and shakes is what you will find at this landmark sandwich shop on 14th street between Washington and collins. it’s one of the best places on the beach for an outstanding selection of light fare with a French flair. very reasonable prices. Open from 9 a.m. to 5 a.m. and delivery until 10 p.m.

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restaurant concept now in miami David’s Café II offis of Lincoln RoadBeach, Mall andMeridian offering Avenue an assortment delicious on for some of of the finest Cuban Andand all at very Kones, dishes sushi anywhere. rolls, sakes, salads. reasonable prices.

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CAFE CON LECHE @ SCORE PHOTOS BY JUAN SACO MIRONOFF

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THIS WEEK THURSDAY, May 5 HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO B&B: Edison Farrow hosts the newest evolution of his weekly Simple Life Thursdays at B&B, formerly known as the legendary Jade Lounge. Tonight fashionistas, party boys, and everything in between will come out to move to the beats of DJ Daisy D. This is sure to be the hottest new party in South Beach!

MOVA: Stop by for happy hour from 3 p.m. to 9 p.m., followed by a night with the ladies, as Pandora Events hosts a special Cinco de Mayo Sweet with unlimited margaritas from 8 p.m. to 11 p.m. for only $20 and music by DJ Zehno. Located near the corner of Lincoln and Michigan.

PALACE: Palace hosts Cabaret Thursdays with solo performances by the incomparable Tiffany Fantasia. Show starts at 6 p.m. $3 domestic beer and $11 draft pitcher specials all night.

SCORE: Enjoy cocktails out on the patio and watch the famous Lincoln Road traffic pass by as you and your friends chill and enjoy great music. Tonight Score hosts the steamiest Thursday night soiree with fab beats by DJ Pride paired with an incredible crowd of delicious partygoers. 727 Lincoln Road, Miami Beach.

TWIST: Don’t miss out on a fabulous night at TWIST with seven different bars, DJ Just Oliver, stiff drinks, and beautiful dancers. And if you’re looking for some hot papis, DJ Adora will be hosting Sabroso in Bar 5! “Never a cover...

Always a groove.”

FRIDAY, May 6 HYPE: Tonight Edison Farrow hosts his Friday night sensation, Hype, with free Finlandia vodka cocktails from 10 p.m. to 11 p.m. and music by DJ Bryan Zero.

721 Lincoln Lane. www.sobesocialclub. com MOVA: Grab your favorite STR8, and head to MOVA for STR8 UP Martini Happy Hour till 9 p.m. Afterwards, it’s @MOVA Fridays with Pussila. Enjoy $6 Finlandia vodka cocktails and a fab beats by DJ Miik. Located near the corner of Lincoln and Michigan.

PALACE: Drag Madness is the place to be to see the hottest Friday night shows by Latrice Royale, Champagne Bordeaux, and Noel Leon beginning at 6 p.m. You never know what these girls are gonna do, so get there early!

TWIST: Don’t miss out on a fabulous night at TWIST. Enjoy seven different bars, DJ Michael Tank, stiff drinks, beautiful dancers, and, of course, the only place where there’s “Never a cover...

Always a groove.”

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SCORE: The Penny Back Boyz host the weekly Friday night party Filthy Gorgeous Fridays with DJ Mac spinning a true open format and Score’s hottest Go-Go boys on the speaker boxes.

SATURDAY, May 7 DISCOTEKKA: Downtown Miami’s only gay dance party delivers one hell of a shindig every Saturday night as Discotekka divas Vegas Dion, TP Lords, Sasha Sky, and Victoria Sky entertain and mesmerize the crowd while international DJs keep up the beat. Doors open at 11 p.m. 950 NE 2nd Ave. www. discotekka.com MOVA: Stop by for happy hour from 3 p.m. to 9 p.m., followed by FLASH Saturdays with the hottest music videos and visual entertainment by VJ AJ Reddy till 3 a.m. with $7 Belvedere cocktails all night. Located near the corner of Lincoln and Michigan.

PALACE: Enjoy a special day of drag shows, great food, and stiff cocktails, as The Palace Bar hosts Drag Madness with Tiffany Fantasia and her gaggle of performers! Heels hit the pavement at 6 p.m. sharp!

SCORE: Tonight is Score’s weekly Bigger Saturdays, the largest gay dance party on the Beach with beats by international DJ sensations, and performances

by CircX. 727 Lincoln Road.

TWIST: Happy Hour 2-4-1 with Tommy and the locals from 1 p.m. to 9 p.m. on everything. Come tonight and enjoy a full house of hot men and some incredible beats by DJ Mika. “Never a cover...

Always a groove.”

SUNDAY, May 8 ANGLERS: If you are looking to nurse that hangover with some unlimited mimosas and bloody Mary’s, look no further than 660 at the Anglers. Enjoy great food and delicious libations in one of the most beautiful boutique resorts Miami Beach has to offer.

THE LORDS: If you love great food paired with free drinks, Punch Brunch is the way to go, as Cha Cha Rooster at The Lords offers a two-course meal paired with two free cocktails for only $25. Afterwards, enjoy cocktails poolside for their weekly Punch T-dance.

MOVA: MOVA: It’s It’s time time for for one one of of the the wildest wildest parties parties in in SoBe, SoBe, as as the the Penny Penny Back Back Boyz Boyz host host their their new new party party Out-n-Ugly Out-n-Ugly Sundays Sundays with with DJ DJ Power Power Infiniti.

Infiniti. Enjoy Enjoy $3 $3 beers, beers, $4 $4 Herradura Herradura Shots, Shots, and and $5 $5 Finlandia.

Finlandia.

No No cover. cover.

PALACE: Swing by the only gay bar on Ocean Drive for one of SoBe’s most unique and over-the-top brunches, as

some of South Florida’s most fabulously frocked fellows take to the sidewalk to perform for hundreds of onlookers during Brunchic. Two seatings: 11:30 a.m. or 2 p.m. Afterwards, check out the sexiest Sunday T Dance in SoBe. 1200 Ocean Drive.

SCORE: It’s Panty Raid, an afternoon party for women who love women, followed by Score’s weekly karaoke night hosted by Tiffany Fantasia. With over 2,000 titles to choose from, you are sure to find a song to inspire your inner star. Grab a cocktail and belt out your favorite number.

TWIST: 2-4-1 happy hour from 1 p.m. to 9 p.m. on everything. Afterwards, some of the most scandalous drag performers will hit the stage upstairs, while DJ Paulie works it out on the main dance floor.

At TWIST: “Never a cover...Always a groove.

MONDAY, May 9 B BAR @ THE BETSY: Tonight is reserved for industry insiders. Bartenders, strippers, dancers, waiters, and everything in between will be partying up with DJ FR8-O, while enjoying a premium open bar from 9 p.m. to 10 p.m.

KILL YOUR IDOL: Dustin Reffca presents Glitter Box Mondays with Manic Monday beats by DJ Smeejay. $1 PBR Beers and $4 vodka drinks. Doors open at 10 p.m. 222 Espanola Way, Miami Beach.

MOVA: Tonight is SHOUT!, a hot new karaoke night, where everyone can be a star or at least try to be. And if you need a little liquid courage, there will be half priced drinks all night long. Located near the corner of Lincoln and Michigan.

PALACE: Stop in for comfort food at lunch or dinner. Special bon voyage cocktail specials all day. 1200 Ocean Drive.

SCORE: Happy Monday, where all drinks, well and domestic, are half-price from 3 p.m. to 9 p.m. No cover.

TWIST: Happy Hour 2-4-1 drinks ‘till 9 p.m. Then it’s “I’m A Local” night, with $3 drinks for anyone with TWIST’s “I’m A Local” I.D. all night long. Join Nathan in the Frolic Lounge for his signature mix of pop and the top 20. Also check out the fabulous men of Gaiety in the Bungalow Bar starting at 10 p.m. and DJ Bryan Zero’s fab beats on the main dance floor.

TUESDAY, May 10 THE LORDS: Enjoy sultry jazz tunes by the fabulous Maryel Epps from 8 p.m. to 10 p.m., while nibbling a delicious

three-course meal paired with a cocktail for only $35.

MOVA: Stop by for happy hour from 3 p.m. to 9 p.m. followed by Mova’s weekly Drag Bingo, hosted by Geraldine and serving as a benefit for Care Resource from 8 p.m. to 10 p.m. with $5 Finlandia cocktails and half priced cocktails from 11 p.m. to midnight. Located near the corner of Lincoln and Michigan.

PALACE: Better than ever before on Ocean Drive and 12th Street, try it for lunch or a late afternoon snack, or just hang out at the bar with the locals. No matter what you’re in the mood for, Palace is sure to have it!

SCORE: It’s Planeta Macho, the hottest Latin Party in Miami Beach, featuring incredible Latin beats by award winner DJ George Ferrero, Pelu Rivero on drums, amazing shows by Miami’s best female impersonators, and the hottest crowd in town. Don’t miss this party – it’s South Florida’s Best Latin Party!

TWIST: 2-4-1 Happy Hour from 1 p.m. to 9 p.m. on everything. Tonight Dustin Reffca hosts his weekly party, Fun House Tuesdays. With DJ Daisy D working the turntables on the main dance floor, you can bet the beats will be hot and the dance floor, packed. $5 Jumbo Blue Long Island Ice Teas all night long.

Never a cover… Always a groove.

WEDNESDAY, May 11 taketake on oldTHE LORDS: LORDS: Enjoy Enjoya aboozy boozy on school pastimes, such as Twister, Spin the old-school pastimes, such as Twister, Bottlethe and strip-Texas Hold ‘Em, Spin Bottle and strip-Texas Hold along ‘Em, with college frat house favorites Beer along with college frat house favorites Pong Pong and Flip classics Beer andCup Flipand Cup and Connect classics Four andFour Jenga.

Connect and Jenga.

MOVA: Stop by for MOVA’s weekly College Night Wednesdays, hosted by the Penny Back Boyz. While DJ Bryan Zero works the turntables, enjoy a $1 Finlandia cocktails from 9 p.m. to 10 p.m. followed by $4 Finlandia Cocktails all night long. Located on the corner of Michigan and Lincoln.

PALACE: Stop by the Beach House to enjoy one of Palace’s signature cocktails. 1200 Ocean Drive.

SCORE: Come and spend a pleasant evening on one of Score’s outdoor couches as they host Martini Madness Night. A half price Happy Hour runs till 9 p.m.

TWIST: It’s time to hit the stage as Sean Brady hosts the Sean Brady Show.

Karaoke and tons of entertainment all night long. After getting your jam on, head over to the main dance floor to snag some beats from DJ Maximus 3000. Happy Hour from 1 p.m. to 9 p.m. with 2-4-1 on everything. “Never a cover...Always a groove.”

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