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SPORTS: Cougar girls nab another conference title PAGE 8
‘Everybody’s journey is different’
How to help
There are many ways to help a loved one, co-worker, neighbor or friend experiencing abuse. Your support will be a critical part of a victim’s path to safety and will help create a violence-free society for all. Below are 11 steps you could take to helping someone in your life: 1. Call for help 2. Be there 3. Believe the story 4. Offer choices 5. Be supportive 6. Help out 7. Be a mentor 8. Educate yourself 9. Advocate 10. Speak out 11. Teach non-violence
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Scott Wahoski’s giant pumpkins are on display in front of his Lino Lakes home.
Pumpkins: 3 decades in the making
DOMESTIC ABUSE INTERVENTION PROJECT | SUBMITTED
Domestic violence, intimate partner violence, dating abuse and relationship abuse, do not discriminate. They can impact people of any race, gender, sexual preference, religion, education level or economic status. Moreover, relationship violence often looks different from relationship to relationship. First observed in October 1981 as a national “Day of Unity,” Domestic Violence Awareness Month is held each October to unite advocates across the nation in their efforts to end domestic violence. Communities and advocacy organizations across the country connect with the public and one another throughout the month to raise awareness about the signs of abuse and ways to stop it, and to uplift survivors by sharing their stories and providing additional resources to leaders and policymakers.
Ashley Guthrie Ashley Guthrie’s life looks very different now than it did a few years ago. The 32-year-old Hugo resident says her friends have always joked that her life is like a Michael Myers movie. “I have been in the worst relationships. I pick the worst guys,” she said. “It is kind of a pattern.” Guthrie said she has been in five emotionally abusive relationships, some of which became physically abusive, too.
Guthrie reconnected with someone she went to high school with. They got married, bought a home and had a daughter. “He kind of always had this underlying drinking problem and I didn’t realize how bad it was,” Guthrie said. “The drinking got extremely bad, to the point where he wasn’t even hiding it anymore.” Guthrie recalled an incident where she went downstairs to wake up her husband and, in the process slipped on his vomit on the floor. She woke him up from a drunken nap and he got very angry. The police were called. He wasn’t physically abusive, she said. “That is one thing he never did. It is something that I used to justify a lot of things he did. He doesn’t hit me like my other boyfriends did. He doesn’t throw me at elevators or push me down the stairs,” she said. Guthrie recalled another incident that occurred while she was pregnant. Her husband was drinking and depressed, then put a
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l loaded gun to his head. “He went to put the gun down and it went off and went through our floor,” she said. “I told him if he ever brought a loaded gun out ever again, I would leave him.” She stuck to that ultimatum. One day Guthrie had a strange premonition while she was at work, so she decided to come home to have lunch with her mother, who was watching her newborn daughter, Emery. Her husband came home for lunch, which Guthrie said was not normal. He was acting strange and started randomly fi xing things when Guthrie’s mother made a suggestion. Her husband then got extremely irate and started shouting at her mother. The cops were called, and police suggested that her husband leave the home for awhile. He agreed to leave and to pack up his things. A little while later, Guthrie received a text message displaying a picture of her husband holding a gun to his head. “I called the cops, and they said to stay outside. Within three minutes, my entire house was surrounded by cops with giant guns and shields,” she said. “It was insane. It was like a strange movie. I was so overwhelmed and I couldn’t believe it was happening … I tried to stay calm because I had this tiny baby in my arms.”
BY SHANNON GRANHOLM LEAD EDITOR
Scott Wahoski has been growing pumpkins for three decades and counting. What originally started out as a traditional-size pumpkin has now grown into 140 pounds. Scott and his wife, Lynn Wahoski, former White Bear Lake residents, now live in Lino Lakes, right near the Hugo border. Scott says he fi rst got the “garden bug” growing up, when his father had a garden in Roseville. Shortly after his oldest daughter, Heather, was born, Scott decided to start growing pumpkins. “I thought it would be fun to have her watch a pumpkin grow that she could then use at Halloween,” he recalled. Not only did their second daughter, Holly, get to enjoy the pumpkins over the years, but so did their neighbors and friends and — now — their grandchildren. Recently joining their 9-yearold grandson Landon are two granddaughters, identical girl twins Madeline and Emma, who will also surely enjoy the pumpkins. Scott said, “We are carrying on a family tradition.” Scott said he learned everything he knows about pumpkin growing by watching YouTube videos and reading articles online. Every year
SEE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AWARENESS MONTH, PAGE 7
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