December 2018 / January 2019 issue of Live it! Magazine

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Experiencing Grief and Loss Over The Holidays

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Gift of time ...

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Time is defined as “the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present and future regarded as a whole.”

As we grow older, we learn to cherish the time spent with family and friends – especially during the holidays.

We cherish memories of our holidays as children, we treasure the holidays of today and look to build memories for holidays to come.

Opening gifts on Christmas morning is often viewed as a highlight of the holidays. But I have definitely come to cherish watching others open their gifts more than opening those meant for me. Not that I don’t cherish the thoughtful gifts I receive, it is just such a joy to watch our children and grandchildren open gifts carefully selected for them.

Each year, however, as they grow older and more established, it becomes increasingly difficult to find just the right gift. As with expanded family gatherings, it seems we are simply picking an item off a submitted list. Everyone is rushed for time, with so many holiday tasks to complete, so it makes sense.

Keep it simple, make it easy. It feels to me, however, to be very impersonal.

That is why, this year, we took a family vacation with our kids and grandkids – in part an early Christmas gift. This fall we rented a lake home where the grandkids were able to fish. We hiked, played games, shared good food and evening fires, celebrated a birthday, painted pumpkins and generally just spent quality time together.

Our son even quoted back to me this year: It’s not necessarily which day we celebrate together, but the quality of time we have together.

So, rather than rushing all the family gatherings into a relatively short time, we also try to be flexible to make it easier on everyone.

Time is valuable. And giving the gift of time is something to be treasured.

At varying stages of life, we all value time in different ways. In this issue, Carolyn shares the stories of those who cherish their time outdoors, in the arts and by spending a lifetime with each other, as well as suggestions for giving the gift of time this holiday season.

Enjoy their stories and more in Live it! Magazine!

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Copyright Š 2018 West Central Tribune Live it! magazine All rights reserved. Although some parts of this publication may be reproduced and reprinted, we require that prior permission be obtained.

Cover Story

Enhance your holiday season to last the year

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December 2018 / January 2019, Volume 7, Issue 6

WHAT’S INSIDE

FEATURING

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6 Presents vs. Presence 8 The calm of time spent outdoors 9 Gifting tidbits 10 Inspiration and Expression 11 A life well-lived 11

DEPARTMENTS 3 READER’S MAILBAG What we hear from our readers

12 Q&A: Treasure each day 14 LIFE HAPPENS Grief and loss 15 MONEY MATTERS Holiday financial checklist

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16 STYLE IT! Cute, cozy and warm 17 DIY Gifts with a homemade touch 18 GIFT IT! Creating unique food treats 20 WHAT’S HAPPENING? Mark your calendars

21 SPIRITS Yesterday, today and tomorrow

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The Gift of Time Giving your presence instead of presents

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By Carolyn Lange

F

clange@wctrib.com

or many people, Christmas is all about the gifts under the tree.

But if your people-to-buy-for-list includes older people who are downsizing, working families who are stressed with home and work responsibilities, a millennial who prefers a minimalist lifestyle, and kids who have closets packed with clothes and toys, perhaps the best thing to give is the gift of time.

The idea of giving your “presence” instead of “presents” can be a way to enhance not only the holiday season but a lifetime.

Spending time with people, traveling and

having experiences can be more valuable than an expensive gift tied with a bow.

And when the holidays are over, instead of having another gift to put on the shelf – there are instead memories to last a lifetime.

There are many wonderful ways people use their gift of time. In this issue of Live it! we present several examples of how people recognize that time is a precious gift, and how their values are reflected in how they use that gift.

Carolyn Lange is a features writer for Live it! Magazine, and a reporter with the West Central Tribune in Willmar.

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Photography by Erica Dischino edischino@wctrib.com

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It’s a gray, misty, cold November day.

The kind of day that allows a deep chill to creep into the bones.

The kind of day that many of us would like to spend curled

“There isn’t bad weather. Just bad clothing,” said Carl, who had helped tuck Ingrid into a cuddly snowsuit and then into a backpack carrier before the family of three began a brisk walk through Sibley State Park near New London.

“Being outside in nature mellows her out,” said Carl, looking at Ingrid – who was clearly ready for the walk and jiggled impatiently when her parents stopped on the trail to talk.

Being outside “brings a little calm to people’s lives,” Carl said. “It slows everything down.”

The young, active couple have always been outdoor enthusiasts. Their dogs “introduced” them to each other at a dog park in Nebraska, said Adrianne.

They are trail runners, hikers, cross-country skiers and campers, and this summer backpacked for a week in Switzerland with Ingrid.

Adrianne said running and being outside in nature gave her a “place to find that comfort and stillness” she needed while grieving for her dad.

Carl ran a marathon in 18 inches of snow.

They are intentional about spending time outdoors and make it a daily priority.

They believe it’s important – while they are healthy and able – to spend time together outside where they can focus on each other and not be distracted by the busyness of life.

Being outside brings a little calm to people’s lives. It slows everything down.

– CARL FRITZ Being outside “lines up with our values” and the desire to “be in nature” and not let “anything get in the way of spending time together,” Carl said.

They want to show Ingrid the value of being outdoors and the importance of being together with family, Adrianne said.

“We want to demonstrate that every day, even if it’s a short walk outside.”

When their separate jobs as regional sales managers brought them to Minnesota, they researched places to move based on outdoor options communities had to offer.

They chose to live close to Sibley State Park so they could be outdoors in a place with trails and woods and prairie.

If Ingrid is in a bad mood, “we just take her outside and she’s all smiles,” said Adrianne.

Being outdoors after coming home following a stressful day at work helps the couple “reset” their attitudes “by being mentally and physically renewed,” Adrianne said.

The more time they spend outside, the more they realize how “fragile” the earth is, which affects their lifestyle choices for energy use and recycling.

Hiking on glaciers that are shrinking also makes them realize those glaciers might not be there for Ingrid to walk on by herself when she’s an adult.

That’s why they’re doing it now.

“Being outdoors is a gift of time with her,” Carl said.

Gift of time tidbits Time spent helping

• Make gift certificates for free babysitting youngsters in your life. This can allow busy parents to have a date night and create memories for you and the children.

• Help an elderly relative with household chores or repairs.

• Teach someone something you know – like how to make a special heritage food.

• Share your unique talents with someone, like fixing a computer, doing taxes, painting, gardening or decluttering a closet.

• Run errands for someone who has difficulty getting around.

• Explore opportunities for volunteering at a community organization.

Time spent having experiences

• Get tickets to the local community theater and invite a friend or family member.

• Give your spouse a year’s worth of date-night certificates with a commitment to do something fun on a regular basis.

• Take a day off from work to spend exclusively with your spouse or child and let them pick the day’s activities.

• Take an art class, go bowling, try out for a play, go to the library.

• Make a night at home fun by cooking a meal together, playing games or building a fort out of card tables and blankets.

• Many older people who live alone miss being touched.

Spend time holding a hand, giving a hug or combing someone’s hair.

Time to share stories

• Use your phone to record a video interview with elders to capture family stories.

• Help children create a family photo album.

• Read books, newspapers and magazines out loud to children and senior citizens.

• Make a collection of favorite family recipes with special notes about where the food was served and who was there.

• Share your own stories of growing up with your children and grandchildren. Show them the house you grew up in, where you went to school and where you played.

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The gift of teaching When they first started meeting on Tuesday nights in Kristin Allen’s New London art studio, Greenwater Garage, they were all pretty much strangers.

The participants in the weekly drawing club had different reasons for being there and came with different artistic abilities.

But by spending time together, learning skills together and learning about each other, the teacher and students have created a community.

“They’re all in on this with me. It’s like a big experiment,” said Kristin. “They love it and they’re growing and changing, and they’re teaching me what this practice does for them individually.”

As a successful commercial and graphic artist whose two sons are now out of the house, Kristin said she started to think about what kind of mark she would leave on the world.

She wanted to do more than just punch out at the end of a career, so she decided to teach people how to draw and started offering Tuesday night drawing classes.

It’s turned into much more than that.

“Sure, they’re learning to draw, but they’re putting themselves on the paper,” she said. “And they’re getting rid of anxieties and they’re getting rid of the tensions of the day, and they’re learning from each other and building connection and community.”

For Jared Wosmek, a local law enforcement officer, the drawing class gives him time to practice self-compassion and self-care.

“It’s important to have balance and treat yourself kindly,” he said.

The class also gives him a new way to “reconnect with the art part of me” while at the same time building meaningful

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It’s like a big experiment. They love it and they’re growing and changing and they’re teaching me what this practice does for them individually.

– KRISTIN ALLEN relationships with others.

“Being creative is one of my core values and it’s a way to honor that part of me,” he said.

“The Tuesday class is total therapy for me,” said Shelli Sanderson. “I love everybody. It’s gotten to be a family.”

“Everybody has their own quirks and we always end up laughing. So it’s always a good feel.”

Shelli always “liked to putz with drawing” but wanted to learn real skills now so when she retires she’ll have the abilities and the time to dedicate to art.

When Kristin started teaching the class, she didn’t know it would become as important as it has.

“The intention was to get together, let’s learn something new, let’s do it together, we’ll learn from each other, we’ll trust the process and we’ll show up,” she said.

Kristin said the weekly classes have shown her the value of taking time to teach people how “healing and meaningful” it can be to make something or express something.

“This is having an effect on people. And we should all do that,” she said. “And so now I kind of feel like it’s a crusade.”

Limited time – Hospice Throughout the 65 years that Dick and Mary Lou Arne have been married, the Willmar couple has lived a full, rich life that included work, a close-knit family, tons of friends, travel, volunteering for community organizations, gardening, hunting, fishing, camping, cooking, sports, being involved with church and politics and having fun – including pulling a few good-natured pranks.

“We lived a rounded life,” said Dick, 90, who had a career in real estate and “loved every minute” of his job.

By doing the things that “cement our lives together” in a city they love dearly, Dick said he and Mary Lou “enjoyed our life together with our kids and our grandkids” and spent time together as a family that “helped our children grow into maturity.”

It’s a life that also had hardships and grief, but the couple say they have no regrets.

But they do have limited time left with each other.

At the time Live it! visited with the couple, Dick was in hospice at Bethesda Grand in Willmar, suffering from several medical conditions, including cancer.

Mary Lou was spending a majority of each day with her husband. They laughed together through a steady conversation while Mary Lou pushed Dick in a wheelchair to activities and meals at Bethesda.

They’ve outlived their own parents by 40 years, “so we feel blessed,” said Mary Lou. “We’ve had a wonderful life together.”

When lives draw to a close it’s important to spend time doing things that are truly important, said Emily Molenaar, a social worker with the Rice Hospice program.

“The things that we value come to a clearer light when we find our time is limited. It really crystalizes that for us,” said Emily.

Through her work with hospice, Emily advises families to “invest in those memories” and don’t be afraid to say “I’m sorry” and “I was wrong.”

“The more that we can get out our I’m sorries and I forgive yous, as well as the thank yous, that just helps our relationships be about celebrating each other rather than

about posturing and about trying to prove value and worth,” she said.

Hospice can help families with the tasks they need to complete before someone dies, such as pointing people in the right direction for legal and financial issues.

“But oftentimes it’s just helping people share memories and do things that they need to do to bring their relationship full circle,” she said, “so they can just celebrate the time that they have together.”

Emily said working with families in hospice has made it clear to her that the importance of money and material things fades quickly away compared to the importance of spending time, having experiences and making memories with loved ones.

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QA &

Giving the gift of time

By Carolyn Lange clange@wctrib.com

L

iving a life that makes the most of the time we’re given – and learning how to give the gift of our time to others – can take on special meaning during the holiday season. asked Kathy Hartley, a retired Lutheran pastor who works “very part time” at Bethel Lutheran Church in Willmar, to offer some guidance on this topic.

Pastor Kathy has her own unique perspective. After working in education for 15 years in the Twin Cities, she went to seminary and worked as a full-time pastor for 18 years.

She’s striving to find a new life balance between work, family, recreation and service by spending time with her husband, three adult children, new granddaughter and riding her bicycle around the world. She’s taken bike tours and/or biked in France, Italy, Ireland, Iceland, Austria, Czech

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Republic, Australia, England and Norway.

She said she also “spends time now – so I don’t have any regrets – helping and visiting my parents who are 88 and 92.”

As a pastor, you’ve been a part of people’s lives when they’re children, newlyweds, young parents, aging seniors and when they’re dying. How do you think people of different age groups view time and how does that view affect how they spend their time?

Kathy: Of course, when you’re younger you think you have all the time in the world. It’s very rare for a person under 50 to realize how finite their life is – unless they get a lifethreatening illness. That’s why the older generation keeps telling younger people, especially parents, “It all goes so fast, treasure each day.”

With aging comes a wisdom about time that I don’t think is something people can really grasp until they are older.

Nobody seems to have enough time. What advice do you have for families as they struggle to balance the demands of making a living and truly living in ways that reflect their values?

Kathy: One of the best things families can do is to be intentional in building memories – especially through traditions. When kids are adults it’s always a surprise when they look back and remember how important the family traditions are to them.

And they don’t have to be expensive vacations or material things that cost a lot. We took our kids all over the United States in a used pop-up camper and now they love to tell stories of campfires, hikes in the mountains and sleeping on the hard table bed.

Time management people would say to make a “bucket list” of experiences you want to have as a family and then make a rough plan of when you will do them.

That’s why the older generation keeps telling younger people, especially parents, ‘It all goes so fast, treasure each day.’

– KATHY HARTLEY

In the Christian church, Advent is a time of preparation. What are some meaningful ways people can spend time preparing for Christmas?

Kathy: Many families use an Advent wreath or calendar and do a short reading periodically during Advent which kids like – if it’s not too long!

Another idea is to pick out a gift together through organizations that buy animals such as chickens or goats, or to take a name off the giving trees that are in churches or malls. Some families do cut-out cookies or make lefse together. Many churches have family caroling events.

I think the most important thing for parents today is to be realistic and not beat themselves up if they don’t have this ideal family experience during the holidays.

Another way to give the gift of time is to visit an aging relative or neighbor. I spend quite a bit of time in nursing homes and I see how much joy that brings people.

On Christmas morning, the focus is often about exchanging material gifts. What are some ways people can give the gift of time to each other – not just on Christmas morning but year-round?

Kathy: Every parent wants to make Christmas morning special for their kids. It’s important, however, to find a balance of giving meaningful gifts but not going overboard in expense so that it’s a burden to parents and is overly indulgent to kids.

What kids seem to remember later is the time with the cousins and grandparents, the sledding or the funny things that happened during the Christmas pageant.

Some parents give time to their kids all year long by having special family nights or by taking each child out for breakfast individually. And sometimes you just go and lie on their bed with them and talk.

How important is it to spend time by ourselves and what are some positive ways to do that?

Kathy: Find your passion and do it, even if the time is short when your children are young.

A hobby or pastime – like biking for me, or photography, or quilting, etc., for others – can be a spiritual experience as we are tuned into our inner selves.

Spend time thinking, whether you call it meditation or prayer or self-reflection, it’s healthy for you.

I take a significant trip alone once a year just to experience the strength of self-reliance. That’s a powerful feeling.

Spending time alone is not selfish but is important for growth as a person.

Kathy Hartley poses with her father, Glen Rambow, at Bethesda in Willmar.

At the end of the day – whether that’s the end of a 24-hour day or a lifetime – what advice do you have for people so they can end that day without regrets?

Kathy: First of all, everyone has some regrets at the end of a day – or a lifetime. The idea is to live your life in such a way as to help limit the regrets.

As the old saying goes, most people don’t regret making more money or buying more things. People just need to remind themselves of that when making decisions and then, again, don’t beat yourself up. If you’re a person who is overwhelmed with guilt and regret, it may be important to explore, with a professional, why that is so.

One of the best gifts to give yourself this Christmas is grace – to accept that you make mistakes, as does everyone, and that’s OK.

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Life Happens

Celebrating the holidays anew

By Claudette Larson, LICSW Holidays come with many expectations. Being joyful and ready to celebrate is one of them.

But what if you are experiencing grief and loss this upcoming season and the thought of celebrating anything makes you want to dive under the bed covers from midNovember until the second of January?

If this is the first holiday season after a loss, this may be exactly the case as it is particularly difficult.

How grieving people choose to handle the holidays can run the spectrum: some completely ignore the holiday, others celebrate but in a totally different way, some keep a few traditions but change others or some people keep everything the same. In the end, it’s all about what feels right to you.

There are some important things to keep in mind to make things a bit easier.

If you do decide to forgo the holidays this year, allow yourself to do so without guilt. Holidays come around again, and time will do its healing work so that next year’s festivities may be more attractive to you.

If, however, you feel you are up to celebrating, there are ways to include your passed loved one into your holiday in ways that can honor and create tribute to them.

Making their special dish, watching their favorite holiday

movie, or hanging an ornament with their picture on the tree – all can be a way of including them in the holiday.

So many times those around us may avoid talking about those who have died, believing the subject is painful, when we would like to talk and hear about our loved one as they are always on our mind and in our heart.

For me, this holiday will be the first without my mother.

Christmas is filled with decades of memories we shared together cooking and baking, listening to special music, watching favorite movies and sharing stories of her younger years growing up in New York City and traveling to Italy as a young woman.

I will choose to carry on these traditions in her honor and as a celebration of her life and her legacy.

I anticipate there will be joy and there will be sorrow.

Yet I can’t help but remember that truly this is the beauty of life and I am grateful to be able to experience it.

Take care.

Claudette Larson, LICSW, RPT is owner of Willow Creek Counseling in New London and has enjoyed working with children, teens and adults for the past 16 years.

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Money Matters A gift you won’t return

By Craig Popp

The holidays can be a financial burden. Consumers are expected to spend an average of about $1,000 over the holiday season this year, according to the National Retail Federation.

During a time dedicated to friends and family, personal finances are often overlooked.

Completing this holiday list may put a few dollars back into your pocket this year.

Run a credit report

After last year’s data breach at Equifax, obtaining your credit report is imperative. Don’t fall into the fallacy that you’re safe because there’s been no attack on your identity.

Data that are useful to thieves – such as your Social Security number, date of birth and address history – do not change.

You are entitled to a free report from each of the major credit reporting agencies – Equifax, Experian and TransUnion. You can get a copy from each agency at www. annualcreditreport.com.

I recommend you check your credit report annually.

Given it’s free, there is little reason not to do it. Below are important items to be on the lookout for: ▶ Names you don’t recognize, Social Security numbers that don’t belong to you, or accounts that are not yours. ▶ Closed accounts incorrectly listed as open (it may look as if you have too much open credit). ▶ Incorrect account histories – such as a late payment notation when you’ve paid on time. ▶ Accounts that incorrectly list you as a co-signer.

Hopefully, you find all the information correct. Most people do. If you find something wrong, your personal credit report comes with instructions for submitting disputes and contact information including a toll-free telephone number, internet address and mailing address.

Review insurance policies

Life insurance should be first on this list and most important is ensuring your policy reflects your current situation. Life events such as getting married, buying a new home, or having (another) a child can change your needs.

Finally, review that policy beneficiaries are up-to-date.

Shop your auto insurance annually. The industry is competitive and your current carrier may not have the best available rate. Especially if you added a teen driver to your family policy.

A car insurance review is also a good time to revisit your deductibles. The higher the deductible you select, the lower your car insurance costs. Are you paying too much for extras?

Adding them to your policy can be nice, but it is a good idea

to review those extras to ensure they make sense. Towing, car rental, accident forgiveness, minor violation forgiveness, OEM parts and more are available on most policies. Finally, review your liability limits. If you started with the minimum liability coverage, you may want to consider increasing your limits.

Many individuals buy auto and home insurance from the same insurer to receive bundled discounts. Make certain this combined price is lower than buying different coverages from different companies. If you made any major purchases or improvements to your home, your limits may need to be changed.

Meet with your financial adviser

Your financial adviser wants to meet with you in-person at least once per year. We know you’re busy; however, visiting your financial adviser is like seeing your doctor. Some people only visit their doctor when something is wrong (reactive), while others keep a regular schedule (proactive). Financial planning should be proactive.

Everyone’s situation is different. However, many items apply to most individuals. My checklist includes the following: ▶ Are you maximizing retirement contributions (401k, IRA, Roth IRA)? ▶ Review your beneficiaries and contingent beneficiaries on retirement accounts. ▶ Tax loss harvesting opportunities in taxable accounts. ▶ Does your portfolio need rebalancing to its target allocation? ▶ Are you eligible to make HSA contributions? ▶ Check www.MissingMoney.com for lost funds.

You may not associate changes in your life as having an impact on your finances; however, a reputable financial planner knows questions to assess your ongoing needs.

Remember to visit when you are aware of changes, but be sure you are making regular visits regardless.

The holiday season is often considered the most stressful time of the year. There is truth to the adage that “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Financial preparedness is no different.

Craig Popp, CFA, is a financial adviser at the locally owned, independent office of Raymond James Financial Services Inc., member FINRA/SIPC at 115 Litchfield Ave S.E. in Willmar. Popp also authors The Cognitive Bias — a blog covering the topics of personal finance, wealth management, and investing. He can be contacted at 320-235-1416. Any opinions are those of Craig Popp and not necessarily those of RJFS or Raymond James. Investment advisory services offered through Raymond James Financial Services Advisors, Inc. Website URLs are provided for information purposes only.

Raymond James is not affiliated with and does not endorse, authorize or sponsor any of the listed websites or their respective sponsors. Raymond James is not responsible for the content of any website or the collection or use of information regarding any website’s users and/or members.

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Style it!

Looking cute in the cold

By Erica Dischino edischino@wctrib.com

‘Tis the season for festive parties, mixers and social events to celebrate the upcoming holiday season. It’s a time to give thanks and be joyful (and also bring out that cute dress that’s been hanging in your closet for the past month). But, with the weather in consideration, that cute dress might just be too cold. Here are a few tips on how to dress warm for the weather, but still look chic at the office holiday party.

Wrap it up!

A good wrap or shawl never goes out of style. Throw it over a black-tie dress or pair it with your favorite pair of jeans for a more relaxed look. The added layer will keep you warm in style.

Bring out your booties

Ankle booties are great for the colder months. Shoe fabrics like suede and leather will keep your feet warm. Make sure your ankles aren’t cold and wear them with a pair of thick stockings. Add your favorite skirt and you’re good to go!

Corduroy cutie

Corduroy is everywhere these days – jackets, skirts, dresses, pants. You name it! But, we’re not complaining because this fabric is perfect to keep you warm while looking

trendy. Wear your favorite corduroy dress and pair a longsleeve tee underneath for your next holiday outing.

Wear a turtleneck

The options are endless when it comes to turtlenecks.

Head to your local store or thrift store and you’ll find a bunch of varieties. Pair an oversized turtleneck sweater with your favorite skinny jeans. Or, wear a more fitted turtleneck tucked into a pair of high-waisted pants or a skirt. You’ll be toasty and chic!

Layer it!

Who says layers can’t be cute? Wear a thin, long-sleeve shirt under your favorite sweater to retain heat. Make your favorite pea coat warmer by wearing a polartec underneath.

You can always take it off once the party starts!

Try the Canadian Tuxedo look

Denim on denim is always a go – especially in the cold winter months. This look is great for more casual events.

Pair it with some cute booties or a chic statement shoe for a cute, relaxed outfit.

Erica Dischino is the photographer for Live It! Magazine and the West Central Tribune.

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Do- it-yourself Scarves make wonderful gifts

By Lu Fransen One of the current fashion favorites is the large plaid scarf.

And it’s not too late to whip one up for that “hard-to-buyfor” person on your list, or someone who loves a personal touch. They will love the warmth they provide – inside and out.

These scarves are usually made out of wool or a similar fabric. I was looking for a particular color combination and couldn’t find what I wanted, so I went to my favorite place – Pinterest!

And sure enough I found some ideas to make your own without sewing.

Next I headed to the fabric store, found the plaid flannels and bingo! A plethora of choices, and just what I was looking for.

Make sure you find fabric where the design is woven and not just printed on, because you want to see it from both sides.

I’m not one to follow instructions exactly, so I just bought one yard of a 60-inch-wide fabric, and 1½ yards of a 45-inch-wide fabric.

I cut the 60-inch-wide fabric in half so it isn’t so bulky.

You can do the same to the 45-inch fabric if you want it even thinner. Next I washed, dried and ironed it.

Now it’s time to fray the edges. It so happens that the selvage edges of the fabric I chose were already slightly frayed and then sewed, so I didn’t need to do anything with them.

Having a seam ripper helps you get each thread started, but you can also use a pin to pull the thread up so you can grab it.

This can be putzy work, so I only frayed about a quarter-inch. Alert: My friend didn’t even fray hers and it looks just fine! Now you want to bring opposite corners together.

You can either tie them, or if you don’t like the knot of fabric under the back of your hair, sew them together with a button. And voila, you are done.

My scarves cost around $10 each, or less, depending on how much your fabric cost and if you cut it in half and made two scarves out of each.

Lu follows in her mother’s footsteps of unwinding and relaxing by crafting and creating. Creativity is like a muscle – the more you use it, the stronger it becomes!

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Gift it!

Homemade treats bring unique, just-for-you flavor to the holidays @AnnePolta

I

f there’s no place like home for the holidays – as the saying goes – there’s also nothing like “home-baked for the holidays,” especially when it arrives on someone’s doorstep as a gift.

This year, harness the potential of your own kitchen to create treats for family, friends and neighbors that convey warmth, sharing and that unique just-for-you quality.

The following three recipes are for cookies and candy that make a welcome treat for any recipient. All keep well for at

WALNUT SHORTBREAD

If you have access to black walnuts, this is a good opportunity to use them.

Regular walnuts also work fine. You can find raw sugar on the grocery store shelf, where it’s sometimes labeled as turbinado sugar. Raw sugar consists of large, pale brown crystals. It adds a subtle crunch and sparkle to the surface of these buttery shortbread squares.

4½ ounces walnuts, coarsely chopped (about 1 cup) 2 sticks unsalted butter, softened to room temperature 1/2 cup sugar 3 teaspoons finely grated orange zest 2½ cups all-purpose flour 1/2 teaspoon salt 2 tablespoons raw sugar Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Spread nuts in a single layer on a rimmed baking sheet and toast in oven until fragrant and beginning to brown, about 7 to 10 minutes. Let cool completely.

In a mixing bowl, beat butter and sugar together until pale and fluffy. Add orange zest and stir to combine. Add flour and ½ teaspoon salt and blend until combined. Stir in toasted nuts.

Divide dough in half and transfer each half to an 8-inch square ungreased baking pan, pressing down until flat. Refrigerate 15 minutes.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. With a fork, prick lines an inch or so apart across the dough. Bake until pale golden, about 25 minutes. Remove from oven and sprinkle raw sugar over each. Return to oven and continue baking until sugar is set, about 5 minutes. Remove from oven and let stand for 5 minutes. Cut into squares while still warm, then transfer pans to a wire rack and let cool completely.

Makes 32.

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least a week.

Use your imagination to package these in pretty and festive ways, or let them star as the centerpiece in a custom gift basket – a coffee mug and gourmet coffee beans to accompany the biscotti, for example, or a selection of teas to go along with the shortbread.

Anne Polta may be reached at apolta@wctrib.com or follow her on Twitter @AnnePolta.

BLACK AND WHITE BARK This sweet treat is easy to make and visually appealing.

When stored in a cool place, it will keep well for at least a week.

8 ounces white chocolate, chopped 12 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped 7 ounces dry-roasted peanuts Melt white chocolate in a small pan over low heat, stirring occasionally until completely melted and smooth. Remove from heat and set aside.

Melt bittersweet chocolate in a small pan over low heat, stirring occasionally, until completely melted and smooth. Stir in peanuts.

Spread on a baking sheet lined with parchment, making sure the peanuts are spread in a single layer. Drop spoonfuls of white chocolate on top and use a skewer to swirl chocolates together into a marbled pattern.

Refrigerate until set, about 1 hour. Break bark into large pieces for serving.

Makes about 1½ pounds.

Variations: Top with pieces of Oreo cookie, drizzle with chocolate, pretzel or peppermint stick bits, pistachios or dress the treat up in any number of ways for the holidays.

ORANGE-CASHEW BISCOTTI

The combination of fresh citrus and the rich, buttery flavor of cashews offers a pleasant twist to this Italian favorite. These become quite crisp during the second baking, so you may want to check on them closely and remove them from the oven when they reach the desired level of crunchiness.

1¼ cups all-purpose flour 1/2 cup sugar 1/2 teaspoon baking soda Pinch of salt 2 medium eggs 2 tablespoons grated orange zest 1 cup toasted cashews Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Place cashews in a single layer on a rimmed baking sheet and toast in oven until starting to turn golden, 5 to 7 minutes. Remove from oven and cool completely.

Combine flour, sugar, soda and salt in a bowl. In a small bowl, whisk eggs with orange peel and fold into dry ingredients. Add cashews to mixture and stir to blend well. If dough is sticky, cover and chill in refrigerator 1 to 2 hours, until firm enough to handle.

Preheat oven to 300 degrees F. Divide dough into halves or thirds. On a well-floured surface, shape into logs and transfer to a parchment-lined or lightly greased baking sheet. Bake for 20 minutes or until firm and lightly browned.

Cool on a rack for at least 5 minutes. Cut logs on the diagonal into 3/4-inch slices. Return slices to baking sheet, leaving space around each slice, and continue baking for 15 minutes or until crisp. Cool completely on baking sheet before transferring biscotti to an air-tight container.

Makes about 2 dozen.

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Check it Out!

What’s happenin’? December 2018-January 2019 ‘Charlie Brown Christmas’ Dec. 7-9 Willmar, Dec. 7-8 at 7:30 p.m., Dec. 9 at 2 p.m. The Barn Theatre; The Barn Theatre presents the musical “Charlie Brown Christmas”; adults $20, ages 18 and younger $10; 320-235-9500 or thebarntheatre.com.

Lucia Day Dec. 8 Willmar, 9 to 11 a.m., Bethel Lutheran Church, 411 Becker Ave. S.W., Swedish Candlelight ceremony at 9 a.m. followed by coffee and music; holiday baked goods for sale.

Kandi Mall bake sales Dec. 8, 15 Willmar, 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., Kandi Mall; churches, schools, nonprofit groups and organizations will be selling baked goods.

Link Christmas Concert Dec. 9 New London, 3 p.m., Peace Lutheran Church; choirs from churches present “Songs and Stories: A Celebration of Christmas”; donations to the Link will be accepted.

Holiday Express 18-Wheeler Dec. 13-15 Area towns, the Holiday Express 18-Wheeler presented by the Kandiyohi Men’s Club and the Atwater Chamber will make stops over three days as follows: Dec. 13, 5:30 p.m. at the Lake Lillian Fire Hall, 6:15 p.m. at the Blomkest Fire Hall, 7:15 p.m. at the Raymond Community Center and 8:15 p.m. at the Pennock Community Center; Dec. 14, 5:30 p.m. at the Mug Shots parking lot in Cosmos, 7 p.m. in front of Kinsella Chiropractic in Litchfield, 7:45 p.m. at the Grove City Fire Hall and 8:15 p.m. at the Atwater Community Center; Dec. 15, 5:15 p.m. at the Lake Region Bank in Sunburg, 6 p.m. on First Avenue Southeast in New London, 6:45 p.m. at the Green Lake Mall in Spicer, 7:30 p.m. at the Kandiyohi Civic Center and 8:15 p.m.at the YMCA in Willmar.

Night of Music Dec. 13-16 Willmar, Dec. 13-15 at 7 p.m.; Dec. 15-16 at 3 p.m., Assembly of God Church, 3821 Abbott Drive S.E.; 54th annual Night of Music, “Four Tickets to Christmas”; free tickets available at the church, freewill donation.

Harmonious Wail Dec. 15 Dawson, 7 p.m., Memorial Auditorium; the Dawson-Boyd Arts Association presents “Holiday Wail” by the Americana infused Gypsy Jazz band Harmonious Wail; adults $15, students $5, call 320-312-2311, also at the door.

Christmas Star show Dec. 15, 21-24 Marshall, Dec. 15, 21-22 at 7 p.m., Dec. 23-24 at 2 p.m., Southwest Minnesota State University planetarium, SM 108; “Star of Wonder” show; $5, www.smsu.edu/plantarium.

Willmar Area Symphonic Orchestra Dec. 20 Willmar, 7 p.m., WEAC; holiday concert “A Very Merry Christmas” with a dance troupe from The Main Pointe

School of Dance; adults $10, ages 5-18 $5, under 5 admitted free; family pack 2 adults and unlimited children $25.

Million Dollar Christmas Dec. 20 Granite Falls, 8 p.m., Prairie’s Edge Casino; A Million Dollar Christmas celebrating the music of Elvis Presley, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis, Johnny Cash and signature holiday hits; tickets at www.prairiesedgecasino.com or the casino box office.

Louie Anderson Live Dec. 30 Granite Falls, 6 and 8 p.m., Prairie’s Edge Casino; Louie Anderson will perform two shows; tickets at www. prairiesedgecasino.com or the casino box office.

New Year’s Eve Symphony Ball Dec. 31 Willmar, 6:30 p.m., Willmar Convention Center; dinner, dancing and ringing in the new year with music by the Willmar Area Symphonic Orchestra and 1600 West Addison Blues; $50 by Dec. 22, at Cash Wise Foods, Whitney Music or online at www.willmarorchestra.com.

The Whitesidewalls Dec. 31, Jan. 1 Granite Falls, Dec. 31 at 8:30 p.m., Jan. 1 at 1 p.m., Prairie’s Edge Casino; the Whitesidewalls rock and roll revue will perform two shows; tickets at www.prairiesedgecasino.com or the casino box office.

Velvet Brass Band Jan. 20 Glenwood, 3 to 7 p.m., Lakeside Ballroom; the Lakeside Dance Club presents the Velvet Brass; basic dance lessons at 2 p.m., $10 per person, $5 ages 17-30, season membership available; no jeans, lakesideballroom.org.

Trinity Irish Dance Company Jan. 26 St. Joseph, 7:30 p.m., Escher Auditorium at the College of Saint Benedict; Ireland’s traditional dance form and fused with brilliant elements of American innovation and dance; adults $32, students $15, call 320-363-5777 or online at www.csbsju.edu/wow.

Winterfest Comedy Night Feb. 2 Dawson, 7 p.m., Memorial Auditorium; the Dawson-Boyd Arts Association presents Winterfest Comedy Night; adults $15, students $5, call 320-312-2311 or at the door.

Sawyer Brown Feb. 2 Granite Falls, 8 p.m., Prairie’s Edge Casino; Granite Falls Fireman’s Dance presents Sawyer Brown; tickets at www. prairiesedgecasino.com or the casino box office.

To list your event email liveit@wctrib.com

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Spirits

Swinging between giddiness and nostalgia, between today and yesterday

By Ron Skjong As I drink this wine, I get to thinking about the good old days and I smile because the wine’s creaminess is comforting. It’s the middle ground I need at that moment.

But, it’s the holiday season and there’s so much to be done. Over lunch hour, I need to do at least a half dozen really important holiday “things” and … can you relate to that? Do you feel the holiday high blood pressure syndrome kicking in gear? Let’s swing back to the middle.

Again, a wine permits me to find balance.

Hinterland Vineyards brings a semi-sweet white wine to us in Happy Creek White. The peachy and tart apple taste of this wine is a balance between excitement and nostalgia – the crispness will excite you and the sweetness will bring peace.

If you’re seeking a heavier, more robust wine, try Hinterland’s Marquette Reserve.

It has a slight spiciness to go along with its full-bodied fruit flavor. It’s barrel-aged and is a well-balanced dry wine – a perfect sipping wine for the season.

But aren’t we getting away from the fact that we only have a couple of weeks remaining to accomplish a whole lot of “stuff”?

Let’s get back to the giddiness of the season and forget about this nostalgic nonsense. Let’s … no … let’s not swing, but enjoy a holiday local beer.

An India pale ale is one of my favorite beers and Foxhole Brewhouse gives us a

beauty in its Hallertau Blanc IPA, a single hop brew resulting in an amazing pineapple aroma that leads to a grape and lemongrass taste – there’s a lot of citrus taste, which makes for a nice social hour.

But, I really enjoy a dark beer during the dark months of winter and Goat Ridge Brewing Company makes a wonderful porter called Hey! Porter. Through the frenetic holiday time, this brown porter with its creamy and chocolate toastie flavors is a welcome respite. It will help bring back the meaning of the season.

As we swing between giddiness and nostalgia, I urge all of us to stay focused on what’s really important – to reach out to the people in our lives with open arms and open hearts. Give of yourself – the love you give away will return tenfold.

That’s what Charlie Brown discovered and we are all Charlie Brown.

Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown!

As always, eat and drink in moderation but laugh with reckless abandon!

Cheers!

Ron Skjong writes primarily about the wonderful world of wine but likes to explore various spirits and beers, too. He is married and has four grown children. While stationed in Germany, he was introduced to German wines and from that introduction, a lifelong pursuit developed to find that perfect bottle of wine.

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For many of us, this is a tough time of the year. Why? It’s because we swing between emotional extremes – from wild giddiness to a nostalgic quietness. We get caught up in the holiday hustle and bustle.

You know how it is – there are school and church events to attend, shopping, family to visit, meals to prepare, presents to wrap, cookies to bake, various volunteering, Christmas cards to complete, a tree to decorate, lights to string – and all of that must somehow mesh with our normal (?) life.

Are you feeling a bit overwhelmed?

As you do each these things, you swing from wild giddiness to nostalgic quietness because each of them brings forth a “holiday rush” and a trip down memory lane.

Why does it happen?

Maybe it’s because we want to experience newness but we want it to perfectly mesh with our memories of holidays past. I have another revelation for you – that’s not going to happen, today is not yesterday.

So, we swing between today and yesterday.

Then let’s add tomorrow to the mix Yikes!

That would really make us unsettled at a time when we’re supposed to be focusing on the positive.

Remember Charlie Brown’s good friend Linus?

In the classic holiday short film “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” Charlie Brown is persuaded to direct the Christmas play but runs into a group of his young friends who mock his directing capabilities and ignore him. He becomes despondent until Linus calms the stage with his recitation of the Christmas story. Suddenly everyone is taken away from their giddiness, Charlie Brown is brought back from his quietness and the stage is set for a meaningful celebration. It’s in the middle of things that we find comfort and peace.

The middle of things … hmmm.

As I ponder that, let me sample a few sips of Glacial Ridge’s Molly – an American malbec. Malbecs tend to swing me to the heavy tannin end of the wine spectrum and Molly has a nicely balanced black cherry taste that ends in a slightly sweet finish.

That slightly sweet finish is the middle ground in this wine – it balances everything.

But things are getting giddy and I would like a wine that is quiet. Again, Glacial Ridge comes forth with its Kimberly chardonnay.

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