Watermark's Holiday Guide 2015

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Sat, Jan 16 • 8pm

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COVER ILLUSTRATION BY JAKE STEVENS

CONTENTS 07 INTRODUCTION 11 HOLIDAY WISH LISTS 19 COUPLES’ FIRST CHRISTMAS 24 LAST MINUTE GIFT GUIDE 29 HOLIDAY THEATER FOUNDER | Tom Dyer

PUBLISHER | Rick Claggett

OFFICE MANAGER | Kathleen Harper

SALES MANAGER

Mark Cady

EDITOR | Billy Manes

ADVERTISING SALES

EDITOR | Jeremy Williams

Sam Rennels, Danny Garcia, Bill Jeffries

ONLINE MEDIA DIR. | Jamie Hyman ART DIRECTOR | Jake Stevens

CREATIVE ASSISTANT | Deanndra Meno

Contents of this Holiday Guide are protected by federal copyright law and may not be reproduced in whole or in part without the permission of the publishers. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles, advertising, or listing is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons or members or organizations. Opinions expressed in articles generated by Watermark do not necessarily reflect the views of the editorial or advertising staff.

Watermark cannot accept responsibility for claims made by advertisers.

watermark media

© Watermark Media, Inc., est. 1994 Phone – 407-481-2243 // 813-655-9890 Fax – 407-481-2246 // 813-849-2986 Publisher@WatermarkOnline.com WatermarkOnline.com

THE A M A G I C A L H O L I D AY T R A D I T I O N

DEC 17-23

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407.426.1739

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WA T E R M A R K ’ S

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5

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WA T E R M A R K ’ S

10/22/15 6:46 PM

H O L I D A Y

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SEASON

LOVE!

OF

This year’s holiday celebrations may be the brightest ever BILLY MANES

I

t’s clearly been a banner year for the LGBT community on the political front, and we’re not wasting any time celebrating that. In fact, we’re currently decking the halls with rainbow-colored holly (and a slightly spiked punch). You should smell this place! Welcome to Watermark’s annual Holiday Guide! heartache, from toilet accoutrements

Though Florida can sometimes seem like a season-free zone wherein

to luxury roadsters. We can be an

one falling leaf, one half drop of snow,

odd bunch. But we’ve been nice.

Our advertisers are at the ready

equates to our northern friends’ Norman Rockwell chills soundtracked

with carefully curated selections for

by sentimental carols, it’s also the best

your perusal as well, opening doors

place to be any time of year. For this

for you to experience everything

year’s Holiday Guide, we’re tearing

from where to eat, what to see, how

open the wrapping and looking what’s

to play and how to live better. Good

inside our I-4 corridor, our current

tidings to you, and all of that.

Because this has been the year

LGBT momentum and our sweet spots. Even if we end up with another

of equality, we’ve also checked in

80-degree Christmas, we’ll likely get by

with some newly married LGBT

swimmingly, thank you very much.

couples who will be dancing around

Most importantly, we want you,

the tree (or menorah; or whatever

our loyal readers, to see what we see

piece of joy they might choose) for

and know what we know in terms

the first time as officially recognized

of making the holidays sing. Check

families. That’s huge, and it’s also

out some holiday-themed theater

probably the greatest gift any one of

and grab yourself a chestnut! First,

us could have asked for this year.

though, we want you to buy us things.

Happy Holidays from your friends

Even though we aren’t typically the

at Watermark Media, and Happy New

types to ask for anything (cough), this

Year, too. We’re looking forward to

year we’re presenting our grown-

spreading more information, more

up holiday wish lists, a task that

joy, more entertainment and more

spans the full gamut, from luxury to

love in 2016. Let’s keep it going!

WA T E R M A R K ’ S

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HOME for the HOLIDAYS

SAT, NOV 28 | 2 PM & 8 PM | BOB CARR THEATER Albert George Schram, conductor Home for the Holidays, an annual tradition, welcomes back The Holiday Singers, Florida Opera Theatre Youth Chorus, and Central Florida’s very own singer/entertainer Michael Andrew with a joyous program of holiday favorites. Bring the family and start a holiday tradition of your own!

Please bring a non-perishable food item to donate to Second Harvest Food Bank.

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ALL WE WANT FOR

CHRISTMAS IS...

The Watermark staff is anxiously anticipating your parcels of good tidings

W

hile last year we were looking out for you in our Holiday Guide, pouring libations crafted from the finest of liquors and drag queens available for our whimsy, this year, we’re taking a different route. We’ve roasted our chestnuts and baked our cookies, donned our finest apparel and burned our fingers on church candles, all in the name of getting you to buy us things. Some of us have serious requests; some of us have serious issues. All of us, however, make a pretty nice family. Send goods. Now. RICK CLAGGETT

E

PUBLIS HER

verybody poops! Why not make it more natural with the Squatty Potty?

Creators of the Squatty Potty say humans were made to poop in a squat, relaxing the puborectalis. This muscle creates a natural kink making elimination strained while we are sitting. Squatty Potty relaxes things and makes elimination easier and healthier. Want to be the bomb this holiday season?

Give the gift that eliminates all the others. Squatty Potty

I

SAM RENNELS

O RL AN DO AD SAL E S

me: AMG 6.0 liter bi-turbo V-12, 7-speed transmission,

have been a VERY good

and goes from 0-60 mph

girl this year, so Santa,

in 3.9 seconds, and it has

this is what I would like.

rearview camera, keyless

I don’t need rings or things

go, heated 14-way power

comes in a variety of heights

but I would love to have a

and material. Choose the one

seats with memory, for

2016 Mercedes Benz SL

that will make your friend’s

when I go to the cold

AMG 65 convertible (mbusa.

number two, number one.

country, massage seats

com, $217.550), black please.

Squatty Potty is available

and ventilated front seats.

It is one of the fastest ones,

online at squattypotty.com.

and the pop-up roll bar will

You can also visit your local

very good girl. If you don’t

keep me safe if I go too fast.

Bed Bath & Beyond and Target

have one in your bag, Santa,

I can just see myself cruising

stores for purchase. Squatty

you can go see Brian at

down A1A with the top down

Potty is priced from $25 to $80.

Mercedes-Benz of Orlando.

on a beautiful winter day in

Perfect for the office Secret

He has my name on it.

Florida heading for the beach.

Santa or your loved ones.

It is the perfect gift for this

It is handcrafted just for

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DR. PHILLIPS CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS

Kristin Chenoweth

with guest Cheyenne Jackson

TICKETS START AT $110 Your experience includes: – Show

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N E W Y E A R’ S E V E C E L E B R AT I O N S P O N S O R E D BY:

ALL WE WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS... at paddleboarddirect.com.

JAMIE HYMAN

M

They also sell standard

O N LI N E M EDIA DIRECTOR

boards at Dick’s Sporting

y house used to

Goods for around $300.

be virtually clean,

Living in this wonderful

tastefully decorated

sunshine state of Florida,

and just about clutter-free.

even on Christmas Day,

And then, this past April,

you can take it for a spin!

we had a baby.

Now my house is a

JEREMY WILLIAMS

slovenly baby clothing and

W

TA M PA B AY S TA F F W R I T E R

paraphernalia warehouse,

hen someone

sprinkled liberally with sweet

asks me what

potato spatters, burp cloths and

I want for

a never-shrinking pile of bottle

Christmas I always have an

parts begging to be washed.

instinctive impulse to say, “I

Therefore, for Christmas

want an official Red Ryder,

this year, experiences

carbine action, two-hundred

are at the top of my list.

shot range model air rifle”

We have enough things, but now we have this adorable new member of the family and it’s time to get serious about showing him this world and all of the wonderful views, textures and opportunities it contains.

Plenty of things would fit the bill, such as a season pass to The Crayola Experience (tickets.visitcrayolaorlando. com, $34.99), zoo tickets, a Disney annual pass (disneyworld.disney.go.com, $776.39) or membership at a Mommy-and-Me gym.

It doesn’t all have to be kidfriendly, either. My husband and I need date night more than ever right now and would love to receive a membership to Enzian Theater (enzian.org, $60) or a restaurant gift card so we could steal away for the occasional mimosa-soaked brunch.

Yes, there is something nice about opening beautifullywrapped packages, and believe me - the baby will receive plenty of those. But under the tree for me this year, I’m hoping my friends and family will think of wonderful experiences that help us make some memories.

KATHLEEN HARPER

T

O FFIC E MAN AG E R

his year for

(amazon.com, $39.18). That bit of Christmas comedy comes from the 1983 holiday classic A Christmas

Christmas, I’m

Story. That makes me then

asking Santa for a

think of Christmas morning,

paddleboard. Having my

gathered around the tree

own paddleboard would

with my brothers and sister

make trips to the river

marveling at the colorfully

and the beach much more

wrapped boxes, my Daddy

enjoyable. The paddleboard

looking on with great pride

I would like is a Wahine

at the festivities as he sips

Classic Bamboo in purple.

his coffee and Mama, smiling

This one runs about $1,000

at her little creations and

depending on where you

sighing, knowing that in

buy it. And that’s why I will

a few moments she and

be looking for a used one

Daddy are going to have to

on craigslist. For those that

clean the mess of wrapping

have been living under a

and bows and ribbons up

rock the past few years,

from the living room, then

a paddle board is pretty

spend the day in the kitchen

much a large surf board.

making the most amazing

It has grips on the top for

Christmas dinner blending

your feet. You stand on the

traditional foods with the

board using an oar to move

specialty recipes of Italian

yourself along the river

cuisine that she learned from

or any waterway of your

my grandmother. Those days

choice. Paddleboarding

are long gone, as the children

makes me feel like Jesus

have grown up and spread

walking on water. For

like seeds around the country.

the very balanced, there

Those memories bring back

are also yoga classes on

warm fuzzy feelings. What

paddleboards. Check

do I want for Christmas you

out paddleboards of all

ask? I want Christmas.

different colors and sizes

WA T E R M A R K ’ S

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KATHY

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MANNHEIM STEAMROLLER CHRISTMAS NOVEMBER 12, 2015 AT 7:30PM

LATE NITE CATECHISM SEQUEL ‘TIL DEATH DO US PART’ NOVEMBER 18, 2015 AT 7:00PM

THE MUSIC OF LED ZEPPELIN NOVEMBER 21, 2015 AT 7:30PM

RAGTIME

JANUARY 11, 2016 AT 7:30PM

DISNEY'S BEAUTY AND THE BEAST JANUARY 27, 2016 AT 7:30PM

VINCE GILL & LYLE LOVETT FEBRUARY 23, 2016 AT 7:30PM

THE BEACH BOYS

MARCH 1, 2016 AT 7:30PM

JOSEPH AND THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT MARCH 2, 2016 AT 7:30PM

KATHY GRIFFIN

MARCH 30, 2016 AT 7:30PM

CELTIC WOMAN

APRIL 27, 2016 AT 7:30PM

42ND STREET

MAY 1, 2016 AT 7:30PM

D AY T O N A B E A C H For more shows and information visit:

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S FT ION E! I G S L S B MI ILA D A VA A

ADVENTURE AWAITS YOUR FAMILY THIS HOLIDAY SEASON.

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AND THE

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Santa arrives November 13th

WA T E R M A R K ’ S

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ALL WE WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS... amazon.com) This amazing

JAKE STEVENS

L

A RT DIRECTOR

product uses 16 LEDs to

ight switches are

transform the outcoming

for CHUMPS. They’re

water to a range of colors

permanently stuck in

such as red, green, blue,

place on your wall in your

purple and orange. Imagine

house, aren’t easily dimmable

it: rainbow fabulousness

and you’re saddled with only one color of light. Why on earth would anyone want to use such an archaic form of lumination activation when there is the smartphone controllable lighting system that is Phillips Hue System Starter Kit A19 (amazon.com, $199.99).

Now you can use your smartphone to program your lights to switch on to your perfect customized color and brightness when you enter your house.

Want to be greeted by soft, rich, orange glowing lights?

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Can a standard wall switch do that? No. It cannot.

I

MARK CADY SA LE S MANAGER

need batteries: AA, AAA and C. I have lots of toys and gadgets that are in

constant need of batteries.

There is nothing worse than an undercharged toy when you really want to play with it. And goodness knows what other fun things I might get this year that will surely need batteries.

16

DANNY GARCIA

F

O RL AN DO AD SAL E S

or Christmas, I really want to visit Iceland! Not just because it’s the birthplace

of Björk or the thought of

shooting all over. Showering will never be boring again.

The LED Color Changing Shower Head can be set to specific colors, so red and green it up. The only con this author finds is

the country being filled with rugged Viking men, but because of its incredible scenery.

The thought of taking a dip into some volcanic hot springs while there’s a chill in the air

that, unfortunately, it is not detachable, nor does it feature that wonderful pressure massage. Sorry ladies. Nothing is perfect.

and looking up into the night’s sky and seeing the Northern Lights beats any other location.

Plus, Iceland has been friendly over the last several years and seems to actively

Various tours of everything Iceland has to offer are available including: trips deep into the mountains, whale watching or simply partying the night away in August during Iceland’s Gay Pride. I’ve been good this year, I will find a trip to Iceland under my tree.

If I’ve been really good, the trip would be hand delivered to me by Strongman and actor, the six-foot-nine-inch Hafþór Júlíus “Thor” Björnsson,

wedding registry free-for-all

anything else material in nature. The altruistic side of my wandering mind would likely list something like LGBT workplace rights or whirled peas, but there’s that certain nagging that always pulls me down into the point-of-purchase gutter. This year, dear reader or Santa or Jesus or mom, I really probably need to consider something sensible. How about a new pair of the same shoes-

the Icelandic native that plays Gregor “the Mountain” Clegane on Game of Thrones.

DEANNDRA MENO C RE AT IV E ASSISTAN T

llow me to enlighten you with

all the wonders that

is the LED Color Changing

H O L I D A Y

you cards from my

I feel a bit guilty asking for

from all over the world!

WA T E R M A R K ’ S

aving not even

(or me and him) this year,

welcome LGBT travelers

Shower Head ($10.78,

H

E D I T O R - I N- C H I E F

written the thank

very LGBT progressive and

A

BILLY MANES

for-shoeleather that I get myself annually, the Calvin Klein Fane slip-on loafer boredom hustlers (Size 9, amazon.com, $59.99) that suit my utilitarianism?

Try walking in my shoes.

You’d stumble in my footsteps; I certainly do!

Happy holidays.

G U I D E

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the Anti-ordinary WHAT IF YOU’RE JUST NOT CUT OUT FOR ORDINARY EXPERIENCES? HAVE WE GOT A PLACE FOR YOU. When you explore our selection of artisanal shops selling one-of-a-kind hand-crafted items made by local masters, the only thing you can expect is the unexpected. You thought you knew us? Think again. We’re your antidote for the ordinary.

Bass Pro Shops | Ron Jon Surf Shop | Cinemark Theatres 5250 International Drive | 407.351.7718 | artegon.com Receive special perks by bringing this ad to Guest Services (code: WMH)

Provincetown’s Gay & Lesbian Holiday Festival

December 4-6 Jingle Bell Run • Drag Bingo Shop Hop • Drag Brunch Boston Gay Men’s Chorus Concert & Much More!

Dec. 31-Jan 3 Provincetown’s

New Year’s Celebration including fireworks!

COUPLES’ FIRST

CHRISTMAS! What the holidays are looking like for the newly, legally entwined STEPHEN J. MILLER

W

hat a year! For many Florida

LAURIE: Once I asked, she didn’t want

couples, 2015 will conclude

me to back out, so she said, “Oh, we’ve

with their first holiday

got to do it soon!” [They both laugh.]

We got married at the old historic inn

together, finally legally married.

at Lake Lucerne; it was beautiful!

Florida accepted marriage equality and started issuing licenses Jan. 6. The US Supreme Court made it the law of the land June 26.

our renovating. Laurie’s mom [before she

With such significant changes in

passed away] gave us a Christmas Village,

LGBT people’s lives, we asked a few local

and when everything’s finished, we’ll have

pairs how they planned to celebrate

a nice place to put it. It’ll be the first year

their first holiday season together.

that we’ll have everything where we really

JAMES BLANCHARD-HERBST AND TROY HERBST

J

MICHELLE: We are also in the middle of

want it without stuffing it into a corner.

PORT RICHIE

ames and Troy married August 8 this year after dating for more than two years.

They love entertaining their families in

their new home, especially around the pool.

JAMES: We just bought this house, so

ORLANDO, FL

immy and Robby are both performers who’ve been together for 25 years. Besides acting, singing

and dancing on local and international

we thought the time was right to get

stages, Robby collects Snoopy items, and

married. We’re pretty family-oriented,

Jimmy is an accomplished photographer.

and we like to have them close by. This

ROBBY: We met when we were doing Starlight

is the first Christmas that both families are at our place. I’m looking forward to it.

We’ve been getting everything ready.

Troy also is looking forward to decorating the new house; he’s not happy unless you can see it from space. I’m scared for the electric bill.

LAURIE SOLEIM AND MICHELLE MAILLARD

L

J

JIM HARRISON AND ROBBY PIGOTT

ORLANDO

Express in Germany. I was leaving, and Jim was in the cast replacing us. We got married this year on January 6 by Mayor Buddy Dyer.

JIM: We also said there was no point in getting married unless there was a legal reason; we felt married pretty much from the moment we met.

ROBBY: We used to do more for the holidays, but then I got lazy and sick of

aurie and Michelle just got married September 12 after more than six years together. They also have been

putting the tree up and down every year.

Since my mom moved to Florida, James, my sister, her family and I all

renovating their living room, dining room,

meet at Mom’s house very year.

and kitchen to make an open floor plan.

JIM: Nothing seems very different after

MICHELLE: When marriage became legal, it really made sense for us.

WA T E R M A R K ’ S

25 years. We are saving up for a cruise, so we’ll probably commit Christmas to that.

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Just a short drive east to the coast...

Festival of Light: An Intimate Evening with

M A T I S YA H U

6 ROCKI 01

N ew

Ye a

Pa rty

N’

2

Thurs, Dec 10, 7:30 pm Tues, Dec 15, 7:30 pm Sun, Dec 20, 7 pm

r‘ s E v e

CLASSIC ALBUMS LIVE

ROCKIN’ NEW YEAR’S EVE PARTY

Beatles & Rolling Stones Greatest Hits!

Mon, Dec 21, 8 pm

Thurs, Feb 4, 8 pm

THE WORLD’S GREATEST ALBUMS RECREATED LIVE ON STAGE!

Thurs, Dec 31, 10 pm Sun, Jan 17, 7 pm

Thurs, Feb 11, 8 pm

Sat, Feb 13, 8 pm

Organ Virtuoso!

Thurs, Feb 25, 7:30 pm Fri, Feb 26, 8 pm

kingcenter.com THE ONLY OFFICIAL SOURCE FOR KING CENTER TICKETS

Ticket Office (321) 242-2219 Group/Hotel Ticket Packages (321) 433-5824

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Visit our Emporium Museum Store for a host of unique and nostalgic gifts, each of which are special to the Central Florida region.

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WA T E R M A R K ’ S

thehistorycenter.org Downtown Orlando | 65 E. Central Blvd.

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www.PookiesBowWowBakery.com

We do Birthday Cakes!

Holid ay G and B ift Cards ask Avail ets able

1500 Fairbanks Avenue, Winter Park 407-622-7387 www.facebook.com/PookiesBWB

BOX OFFICE: 863-834-8111

Read it Online!

Head to WatermarkOnline.com and click on the Digital Publications link to read a digital version of the printed newspaper!

MONDAY-FRIDAY 9:30AM-5:30PM

24/7 TICKETS: 888-397-0100

THELAKELANDCENTER.COM

WATERMARKONLINE.COM WA T E R M A R K ’ S

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OOPS! Watermark’s handy guide to finding last minute baubles when you forget you were supposed to plan ahead BILLY MANES

W

e’ve all been there. You’re simply going about your holiday business, pulling up to bumpers (and bumping into them), ruing your very existence, anxious to get home and as far away from the noise of capitalism rearing its ugly holiday head like that of a Cabbage Patch baby. You thought you had it all figured out, did you? The scarves, the sweaters, the plastic toys and electronic joy-makers, all of them are already in your virtual cart. Now, it’s time to nap.

Except it isn’t ever, is it?

The holidays bring with them exponential pressures to impress the desires of others. You don’t have to do nice things with debit cards on Dec. 21, but you damn well better pull out

places like amazon.com and giftcards.com have removed the

certificate Hail Mary pass. Everything from

Your aunt will notice if you do not, friends.

food to booze to whatever people buy at Sears

To that end, Watermark has come up with

can be in consideration. Or you can just get

some panic-scramble suggestions for making certain that it doesn’t look like you’re faking

a prepaid Visa or somesuch and give your

4 5

friends some debit credit.

your way through these themed pleasantries.

Here are some tips!

7-11: It’s not all about Slurpees and Taquitos and emergency iPhone power cords (though sometimes it is when you’re in a pickle). If you really

want to impress your celebratory peers at an obligatory party swish you forgot about, check out the improved beer and wine selections at the corner store. You may be surprised by how

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proliferation of “egift cards” from

“I don’t care about you” stigma from the gift

some magnetic-stripped magic by Dec. 25.

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3

PRINTABLE GIFT CARDS: The

convenient convenience stores have gotten.

REGIFTING: Had a big birthday party, a wedding, a shower? Have a whole bunch of pots and pans you don’t need that are still in their packaging?

You win! Just wrap it in some irony newspaper and rush out the door. You’re running late!

DO NOT BUY A PET ON CHRISTMAS EVE FOR AN UNSUSPECTING FRIEND: We all know the tragedy of puppy mills and animal kill-shelters by

now, just as we know that people who aren’t

THE DRUG STORE: No, we’re not

adopting pets for themselves are probably

suggesting that you raid your

not interested in having pets, or they aren’t

grandmother’s medicine chest for

equipped to. What you can do is buy a harness

the latest trend in opioids. Rather,

and a leash at the bustling pet store, though,

we’re acknowledging that with in your local

and then craft a fancy certificate saying that

apothecary, especially the larger ones, there

you will go to the local animal shelter or

are endless options of sometimes trashy gifts

rescue with them in the new year to find the

that will make you the life of the party. Look for

perfect pet to fit them. Thoughtful and easy!

the “As seen on TV” section, rinse, repeat.

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r 2-SHOW PASS

4-SHOW PASS

INCLUDES 2 FLEX TICKETS 2 DRINK VOUCHERS

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BOTH PASSES INCLUDE EXCLUSIVE DISCOUNTS AT LOCAL EATERIES & BARS

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$150 (25% OFF)

GIVE THE GIFT THAT TAKES CENTER STAGE AND VISIT

AMERICANSTAGE.ORG/HOLIDAY OR CALL (727) 823-PLAY (7529) FOR MORE INFORMATION

FLORIDA STUDIO THEATRE Give the Gift of Live Theatre

NOW PLAYING Soul Mates

written by Bill Castellino with Human Nature and David Rudder

One Man, Two Guvnors

by Richard Bean

FST Improv Every Saturday!

Richard Hopkins, Producing Artistic Director

Sponsored in part by the Department of State, Division of Cultural Affairs, the Florida Council on Arts and Culture, and the State of Florida.

�oridastudiotheatre.org

1241 N. Palm Avenue, Downtown Sarasota

Choreography by Matthew Hart

Production Media Sponsor

Designs by Peter Docherty

18 - 19 DECEMBER 2015

VAN WEZEL PERFORMING ARTS HALL

The Sarasota Ballet Box Office

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“SPARKLING, FRESH AND LIVELY.” - Los Angeles Times

ON SALE NOW! JAN 5 - 10 drphillipscenter.org

ADDING SPICE TO SEASONAL SHOWS STEPHEN J. MILLER

Y

es, nothing gets many of us in the holiday spirit like the classic stage chestnuts. Our hearts race when a choir belts the Hallelujah Chorus, we love to battle a Mouse King on the ballet stage, and we get all warm and fuzzy when Tiny Tim blesses us all. Yet, there are also several alternative offerings sure to keep up the holiday cheer. Here are just a few options:

CENTRAL FLORIDA

FOREVER PLAID: PLAID TIDINGS WINTER PARK PLAYHOUSE, 711 N ORANGE AVE, WINTER PARK, FL 32789 NOV. 13 THROUGH DEC. 19, 7:30PM, SAT. AND SUN. SHOWS ALSO AT 2PM PREVIEW: NOV. 12, 2015, 7:30PM WINTERPARKPLAYHOUSE.ORG

Looking to add some hilarious doowop harmony to your holidays? An angel Rosemary Clooney raises the singing Plaids from the dead. These four handsome, heavenly harmonizers are charged with creating Christmas cheer. It’s a corny, comedic Christmas concert with plenty of heart and some gorgeous singing by the theme parks’ finest performers. Move over, Christmas Carol ghosts; here are some new holiday spirits!

THE PERFECT GIFT DANGEROUS AT THE METHEATRE, 1300 LA QUINTA DRIVE, ORLANDO, FL 32808.

DEC. 3 THROUGH 20 (NO PERFORMANCES ON SAT. 12/5 OR THURS 12/17), THU. THROUGH SAT. AT 8PM, SUN AT 4PM DANGEROUSTHEATRE.COM

This offbeat comedy with an LGBT bent has been a hit in Denver; now it debuts in Orlando. Stacia hates everything about the holidays, especially the panic of picking out the right presents for everyone. That isn’t her only problem; her closest acquaintances are a homeless man she shares lunch with and an invisible friend. Perhaps a holiday party under a local bridge is the answer to Stacia’s problems? One reviewer called the show powerful, personal, and memorable.

WANZIE’S ORANGE BLOSSOM TRAIL “LIVING NATIVITY” CHIRSTMAS SPECTACULAR FOOTLIGHT THEATER AT THE PARLIAMENT HOUSE, 410 NORTH ORANGE BLOSSOM TRAIL, ORLANDO, FL 32805 SATURDAYS, NOV. 28 - DEC. 19 AT 7:30 PM MONDAY, DEC. 21 AT 8 PM WANZIE.COM

After a bonanza of sellouts for last year’s bit of hilarious blasphemy (we mean that in the kindest way), Orlando confection and playwright and actor Michael Wanzie is ready to make the yuletide gay again, on the Trail, along with a generous swath of the rest of the Orlando theatrical community. Expect to spill your drink, eat a wafer, drown in your sorrows and laugh your way through the holiest of messes.

LAKELAND

CIRQUE DREAMS HOLIDAZE THE LAKELAND CENTER, 701 LIME ST, LAKELAND, FL 33815 FRI. NOV. 13, 7:30PM THELAKELANDCENTER.COM

Launched in 2014, this weird and wildly popular circus-themed holiday show overtakes Lakeland for one night only. This is pretty impressive, festive stuff! This year, you can grab dinner before the show right at The Lakeland Center. Then sit and enjoy over 300 costumes, 20 acts, and 30 artists from all over the world. Enjoy talented singers, attractive aerialists, and sexy contortionists. Music, decorations, and new traditions for the entire family make this an oddball odds-on choice!

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TAMPA BAY/ST. PETE

CHRISTMAS IN IRELAND LARGO CULTURAL CENTER, 105 CENTRAL PARK DR., LARGO, FL 33771 WED. DEC. 9 AT 2PM & 7:30PM

Riverdance singer Michael Londra has been called “one of the greatest Irish singers of our time.” He’s also not hard on the eyes. Londra will be sharing some particularly Gaelic charm this holiday season at two concerts in Largo.

CELTIC WOMEN – HOME FOR CHRISTMAS THE MAHAFFEY THEATER, 400 1ST STREET SOUTH, ST PETERSBURG, FL 33701 WED. DEC. 16, 7:30PM THEMAHAFFEY.COM

Made popular by Putamaya Records, Celtic Women have gone multi-platinum worldwide, appearing on stages and televisions all over the globe. This Symphony Tour will not only feature an orchestra backing up these beautiful voices. Celtic Women will showcase songs from their second holiday album.

PETER AND THE STARCATCHER FREEFALL THEATRE, 6099 CENTRAL AVE, ST PETERSBURG, FL 33710 DEC. 5 – 24, 2PM, 7PM, OR 8PM FREEFALLTHEATRE.COM

Though not specifically a holiday show, this musical prequel to Peter Pan has enough magic and childlike wonder in it to melt any holiday heart. Expect pirates, mermaids, pixies, Lost Boys, a crocodile and lots of wondrous mayhem in this origin story about the boy who wouldn’t grow up.

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Coming Out Soon!

1905 North Orange Ave., ORLANDO

BetterThanSexDesserts.com

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