Ink Magazine; Vol. 13

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A Note About Our Cover JESS AND I ENTERED OUR POSITIONS as Editor-in-Chief and Managing Editor, respectively, during an era of unprecedented circumstances. The year 2020 presented us as a team with the challenge to continue to show up and cultivate critical discussions even when it felt impossible to pick up a pen. When it came to finally deciding the theme of our next issue we were unsure, but we felt compelled to address the cultural developments that occurred since Volume 12: the Potential issue, which featured the half uncovered Rumors of War sculpture by Kehinde Wiley on the cover.

Wiley’s Rumors of War triumphantly depicts a Black man mounted on a charging horse, challenging the monuments to the Confederacy that once towered over Monument Avenue. Not even a year after the erection of Wiley’s sculpture, all but one of these lionizations of white supremacy were

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removed from their stone pedestals leaving a physical and metaphorical space left for our nation to fill. The cover of Volume 13: The Space Issue, designed by Emily Woodward, imagines the last standing Confederate general on Monument Avenue, Robert E. Lee, absent from his pedestal.

Now we ask ourselves the questions, “What do we want to place on the pedestal?”, “What do we want to give power to?”, and in short, “What will fill the space left behind?”. In reality we don’t have the answers to all of these questions, but we must imagine a future before we can put it into motion. In this issue we look both inward and outward to contemplate on how to move forward from a year of rage, grief, change, and profound space.

Nico Gavino

MANAGING EDITOR

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR OUR PREVIOUS ISSUE WAS ABOUT fundamental in expanding our recognizing our Potential, who we capacities to understand one another. are and who we can be. Volume 13 Though I have yet to share a physical is about cultivating the space to space with my team that would allow act upon these realizations. Which our creative energies to flow together brings us to question the conception and enrich dialogues that makes of spaces; the one we hold for everyone feel seen and heard, I ourselves, our community, and in thank my team for their resilience between our inner and outer worlds. in adapting to a new realm of interWithin these spaces lie our values, action and continuing to show up for our perceptions, our dreams, our one another. realities. Acknowledging what is, can Upon my own introspective journey, be precedent to the change we are all I’ve realized---The ignition of change searching for. Given the opportunity begins with fostering a consciousness to slow down, it has shown us that that empowers us to be ourselves and in moments of stillness, we have the in turn, fueling it into actions towards chance to gain clarity, dig deeper, reinventing a world that embraces start seeing what is unseen, and resist intersectionality and one that stands the systems that render us separate. tall against injustices.

As I’m writing this, a year has Finally, you may be wondering why elapsed of the COVID-19 pandemic this is “The Space Issue 2.0”. During which has completely transformed the finalization of this issue, we our lives to its most intimate form. surprisingly discovered that there We were challenged to turn inwards was already a Space Issue created by a and face our deepest selves. previous staff member before any of We witnessed social turmoil unfold, our current staff joined Ink Magazine. only to understand that it has We coincidentally created a second always been that way because of the Space Issue without any knowledge outdated paradigm of colonialism, of its predecessor, but even upon capitalism, disconnection, oppression it’s discovery we still felt that this and individualism—-all clouding was the only right title for Volume our visions of a better world. The 13. So please join us as we revisit the pandemic revealed the absence of concept of space and what it means what once was, but leaving us with to the Ink staff today. the latitude to reflect on how we As you read this issue, we hope it choose to carry on and what kind gives you the space to reflect and to of narratives we want to tell. The recognize your own power in being one that remains dominant is one of here, and that you are not alone. harmful, systemic injustices that is We’ve seen time and time again, embedded in the DNA of every power what the potential of our togetherness structure we turn to. Now and always, can do. Change starts within is the time to be interrogating what ourselves, then our communities we know and the operations of white and then it transcends beyond. We supremacy and its manifestations. have the power to harness the kind I became editor-in-chief right at of energy that shifts culture and the birth of quarantine and social challenge limits, so why wouldn’t we? distancing rules. While I didn’t imagine my position to completely be remote Enjoy! (actually in Cambodia for nearly a year with a 12 hour time difference), it made me realize even more that Jess Som enhancing human connection is EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

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MASTHEAD

Jess Som EDITOR IN CHIEF

Nico Gavino MANAGING EDITOR

Claire Evan WEB EDITOR

Noah Daboul and Mijin Cho COPY EDITOR

CONTRIBUTORS:

GRAPHIC DESIGN:

COVER: OFFICE MANAGER: SALES & BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT MANAGER: CREATIVE MEDIA MANAGER:

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Archerd Aparejo Noah Daboul Mariela Gavino Caroline Jenkins Monisha Mukherjee Cecilia Nguyen Kennedi Woods Mac Woolley Archerd Aparejo Andy Caress Ni Sang Gabi Wood Emily Woodard Owen Martin Dominique Lee

INK magazine is produced at the VCU Student Media Center.

817 W. Broad St. P.O. Box 842010 Richmond, VA. 23284 Phone: (804) 828-1058

INK magazine is a student publication, published annually with the support of the Student Media Center.

To advertise with INK, please contact our Advertising representatives at advertising@vcustudentmedia.com Material in this publication may not be reproduced in any form without written permission from the VCU Student Media Center.

All content copyright © 2018

by VCU Student Media Center, All rights reserved.

Printed Locally

Website: www.inkmagazinevcu.com

Email: inkmagazine.vcu@gmail.com

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Youtube: INK Magazine VCU Twitter: @inkmagazine

Mark Jeffries

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TABLE OF CONTENTS

STORY 4

BY NOAH DABOUL Pages 8-11

FEAR

BY CAROLINE JENKINS Pages 12-15

YOUR INSIDE IS YOUR BEST SIDE

BY NICO GAVINO Pages 16-29

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GRAFFITI GENTRIFICATION: The Underlying Effects of Street Art

BY MONISHA MUKHERJEE Pages 30-34

BUILD A BETTER NORMAL

BY KENNEDI WOODS Pages 35-41

WHAT THEY WILL NEVER TEACH YOU IN FASHION SCHOOL

BY NICO GAVINO Pages 42-50

KITES

BY MAC WOOLLEY Pages 60-70

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Story 4

NOAH NOA H

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DABOUL

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Story 4

NORFOLK, Va.- You wake up to a text from your roommate, Jordan, in the house group chat.

“If I had known it was going to be like this, I would have hugged you guys before I left,” he said.

You check the time on your phone, it’s 9:45 a.m. and you’ve slept through the first part of your film class. At this point, you decide to miss it and eat breakfast instead.

Like so many other students facing the reality of the botched and hurried virtual lectures, you’ve stopped caring. You have no motivation to complete your work, other than the fact that you have to. Grades carry no more meaning to you.

“As much as I’m trying, I can’t focus as well on my classes,” said your other roommate, Aidan. He tells you that the only motivation he has is for

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things other than school, like music, art or biking, or only because school is nearing an end. You agree with this statement as it’s exactly what you’ve experienced. You both agree that you’re going to quit school until they hold real classes again.

Luckily though, your school year has a week left in it. You’re able to get one final gust of motivation to finish the year strong. Maybe it’s because you genuinely want to do well, or maybe simply because it gives you something to do with your days.

“I wait to eat each day now, it’s become one of the only things I can look forward to,” said your drummer, Menley. When school let out for spring break, she was only an acquaintance to you, but has now become a close friend as you both have nothing else to do except talk to each other.

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INK magazine

Food and drink has evolved into a daily event for you and your friends.

Everyone around you agrees that eating is one of four things - along with taking a shower, sitting in a Zoom class and going to sleep at 3:00 a.m. - that you have to look forward to. Each meal gives you an opportunity to experiment in the kitchen and try to one-up your mom’s cooking. When you made miso soup with white wine, she retaliated with polenta and cannellini beans.

Cooking gives you something to occupy yourself when you’ve done all the homework you can for the day and can’t stand sitting in front of a computer anymore.

But since your mom was laid off, your mise-en-place has become increasingly smaller.

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Out of boredom, you’ve been getting your cocktail game on every night out of your mom’s liquor cabinet. Pimm’s Italianos and gin and tonics have been your gotos, overpouring on both because why not? Everyone else is in their homes getting drunk. You remember an article in the Washington Post about the skyrocketing rate of alcohol consumption during the COVID-19 pandemic.

“Ain’t that the truth,” you think to yourself as you garnish your tequila, fernet and gin Negroni with a grapefruit peel (little did you know how disgusting it would taste).

“The worst part about this all,” said Menley, “is that the weather is beautiful, and no one gets to experience springtime in Richmond.”

The weather is gorgeous and gets better each day. Above all else, it’s unfair. You know you should be going outside. You know you should be active, especially since you can’t go to the VCU gym, but ultimately you don’t.

“Why bother?” you think to yourself.

Your experience with the pandemic and quarantining yourself has been riddled with frustration, apathy, impatience and more than anything else, boredom.

This is a feeling that your friends share as well.

“I miss you guys,” Aidan said in your house group chat, “I’m excited to see you all when the world gets back to normal.”

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CAROLINE JENKINS

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Overcoming What I Fear Most

F

EAR IS SOMETHING WE ARE all familiar with, some people more than others. I’m afraid of a lot of things, more things than I’m willing to admit. I try not to address the majority of my fears, as I know I will be unable to overcome them, and in this, the fear itself grows. The issue with fear is it never gets easier. Yes, some people do overcome things they have always been afraid of, somehow escaping the intangible cloud hanging over them. However, for most, fear is not something to overcome or effectively stomp out. Fear is something to accept, something that will always be lurking in various corners of your life.

The fact of the matter is everyone is scared of something, and most people are scared of lots of things at once.

Sometimes this fear propels us forward, pushing us to be better, move faster, do more. But it will always creep and lurk in our heads, never going anywhere, only momentarily leaving for small periods or moments when we push it out.

With the first mentions of the virus in the early spring of 2020, there became a somewhat rare phenomenon: an entire body of people became unified with a similar fear.

Ultimately, the fear of death plagues most everyone, and with the eruption of the virus came an onslaught of death-related anxieties. As a 19 year old, I do not often occupy my thoughts with fears of death. I figure as I get older, these thoughts will fill up more space in my head then anything else.

In my early stages of life, I am more fearful of being unsuccessful and failing, never accomplishing my goals and aspirations, which in retrospect is somewhat vain because if I die, my goals and aspirations will become

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irrelevant. In 2020, the collective population was terrified, to varying degrees, of the effects of the virus, and the consequences that would ensue as a result.

During the quarantine stages of spring last year, I had finished school for the semester and couldn’t start working my summer job yet. My head was filled with terrifying thoughts and what-ifs. To me, some of the most gut-wrenching consequences of the virus would mean losing someone I loved. I was less concerned about myself and more tormented by the thoughts of losing my mom or dad, or my brother, or my grandparents. Experts told us my generation wasn’t at risk unless we held underlying health issues. Well, what if I didn’t know of my own underlying health issues? And what if that uncertainty kept me up at night?

My mom is a nurse. She works in surgery at the hospital back home, which is the Outer Banks of North Carolina. There was a point in time during which she told me I was going to have to move to my step dad’s house if things got worse at the hospital—which they eventually did with the rapid and destructive spread of the virus. There were many hushed conversations within the adults of my family prior to this, as there always were during serious circumstances. Although as I get older, I am let in on more of these discussions despite my reservations to be a part of them, but more often I am included in carrying the worry. My mom told me if she was called to help in the ICU I would have to leave, her not wanting to risk infecting me. This was something I never thought I would have to be concerned about, and my fear for my mom began spreading.

I’ve never been a person to have anxiety—like real anxiety that takes over your body. The type that feels

constricting and all-consuming.

The type that you feel powerless to, knowing that the only way to stop it is to gain control again. I first felt this in my last weeks before leaving school in the spring. This was maybe the worst time to have developed high levels of anxiety, as I was living in a dorm and completely unaware of how an anxiety attack manifests. At the time I called my mom in fits of panic when the attacks were at their worst. And when they were at their best I felt a pressure in my chest that never seemed to subside. Looking back, these were early stages of that same fear I mentioned earlier settling in: fear of the unknown and of something I couldn’t control.

I became terrified of my next anxiety attack. I suppose in this sense, fear and anxiety have a causal relationship. Although it is impossible to conclude which causes another, as sometimes the fear leads to anxiety, other times the anxiety leads to fear. Other times, the fear leads to a panic that then leads to more fear. In this way, the cycle is endless and unrelenting.

The attacks seemed to dictate my life for a brief period. My hands would tingle, and my face sometimes would go numb as my heart pounded inside my chest. I got in lots of arguments with my mom; my fear and anxiousness were projected onto her much of the time since I’m usually not open and expressive with the feelings. I was mostly unable to convey why this was happening, and my mom was unable to understand why I couldn’t talk about it with her.

This was not an experience entirely unique to me, as most people in the US suffered from constricting anxieties and fears related to COVID. According to a study by the Anxiety & Depression Association of America, the majority of Americans believed that people aged 44 years old and younger accounted for about 30% of total deaths from COVID, while the actual figure is 2.7%. Additionally, Americans overestimated the risk of

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INK magazine death from COVID for people 24 and younger by a factor of 50. This study highlighted how people oftentimes believed and became consumed with specific statistics and death tolls from sites that may have been unreliable and harbored heightened paranoia. Even from credible news sources, the media frenzy around the virus made it easy as a viewer to become wrapped up in the bleakness of it all.

I often fell prey to fixating on specific scenarios involving COVID deaths and increased my anxiousness by allowing myself to believe both me and all my loved ones were at high risks for contraction and eventual death. This fear and anxiety, however, was changed in December of 2020.

On New Years Eve I received the results telling me I tested positive for COVID-19. The height of anxiety that had been festering within me for months threatened to come to a head at this point, bubbling over and taking me as its final victim. However, the anxiousness that I had become all too familiar with was nowhere. As I read my results aloud to my stepdad and mom, I looked up and could see a type of hesitation and worry cross their face. My mom was waiting for a big reaction, probably some heaving and panic written across my face. But this is not what I felt. I was calm, and at first I didn’t feel much of anything.

My mom told me there’s this phenomena when people find out they have COVID, a sort of indifference and numb state. A type of relief ensues, as the one thing you have been fearing for so long is finally right in front of you, close enough that you can distinguish it. You can see it finally for what it is and this takes away some of the fear. One of the largest components to COVID-related fear was the unknown, and finally getting to face it head-on meant stripping it of its most terrifying element.

So when I found out I had COVID, I wasn’t anxious, paranoid, or scared, partially because I had already suffered the stress and anxiety earlier in the year and partially because I was

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15 back in control. This control gave me solace, and this solace led to the deflation of the longstanding fear I had been so consumed by in the past year.

I was not able to entirely let go of the unease, however I began to learn ways in which I could deal with the inner-panic.

Being in quarantine prior and during the virus meant reflecting on different aspects of my life and the people around me.

There was so much free time with nowhere to go, I’m sure this is what most all of us did. Being left to my own thoughts is why oftentimes the fear and anxiety took over, especially when school ended. With nothing else to occupy my mind, stress typically was the dominating concern. This, however, changed after I had COVID. I developed a sense of clarity that helped me step back from the more small-scale worries I fixed my mind on often. I could appreciate what I had: my family, my friends, my home.

My perspective was changed from more cynical and pessimistic feelings to having a larger, more effective view of hope. If I contracted the virus and was okay, and my family was okay, I knew that everything was not as bad as I had made it seem for so long. I recently listened to a podcast by NPR called “Facts Aren’t Enough: The Psychology Of False Beliefs” that talked aboutcertain media outlets using fear as a persuasive technique to encourage people to follow COVID safety guidelines. It was found that these techniques were not as effective as using hope as the incentive rather than fear. People were more motivated by dreams of a COVID-free world than the fear of one with growing death tolls. This rings true to me, as I shifted my outlook on the pandemic whilst having the virus. I was now able to recenter my feelings on what

I believed mattered to me such as my future dreams and goals. Additionally, I gained a larger appreciation for what I was fortunate enough to have, such as a loving family and surrounding environment.

It is also important to note that I was extremely fortunate to have been in a situation where having COVID did not shatter my world, or leave me financially unstable or severely ill. Having the virus allowed me to also check my privilege, and realize that I was in a situation that many are not in. The fear and anxiety I felt prior to having COVID I could only imagine was exponentially worse for those already affected by systemic racism, financial instability, underlying illnesses, xenophobia, etc. It was an entirely sobering experience, and although I learned a lot about myself, I also more significantly learned about the ways in which I could have suffered greatly if I were to have been in a different position.

In having the virus, I became closer to understanding the way I respond to the fear and this helped me make sense of my own worry. I find things related to the virus are easier to accept now with a more conscious effort to focus on the potential good that is in the future. I’ve learned lots about myself and how much I am thankful for those around me and my own life. Although I still have lots of fears, I can say that COVID is now no longer the most intimidating one, and I have hope for a future where its grip on us is loosened.

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Your Insid e is Your Best Sid e.

WRITTEN BY NICO GAVINO WHILE THE GLOBAL PANDEMIC HAS HAD three young creatives in the Richmond its hardships, it has also opened an op- area, all of whom are recent graduates portunity for many to focus on creating of Virginia Commonwealth University. a comforting, curated, and contempla- We talked about the shifting meaning of tive space to isolate in. Our homes are home in the time of COVID, their favorsome of the most honest reflections ite things about their homes, and how of ourselves. For each individual, this their homes reflect who they are. From reflection manifests itself in different an industrial studio loft to a single famiways. Some of our homes are collag- ly home guarded by chickens and finally es of all the pieces of our lives; and for to a floating house on the James River, some, the home is a temporary snapshot each space painted a colorful portrait of of where they are. I visited the homes of its occupant.

Photographed by Mariela Gavino

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Aviance “DJBoygirl” DJ/MULTI-DISCIPLINARY ARTIST SHE/HER @ECNAIVA

How has the meaning of “home” shifted for you since the pandemic?

I don’t think it shifted much, honestly. I always considered my home my sacred space. It’s the most important place to me. It’s where I’m alone with my thoughts, it’s where the daily motions happen, it’s where you grow. This is where you cook, clean, sleep, create.

It’s everything. It’s expressive; it's really what’s inside of my brain.

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How does coming home make you feel?

I feel euphoric. I feel at peace. When people visit they say they feel happy and euphoric. I want you to feel comfortable when you come to my home.

What are three words that describe your home?

Eclectic. Maximalist. Artsy.

How does your home reflect you?

It’s all the pieces of my life. I have my vinyls cause I’m into music and DJ-ing. My posters are from work. I have all the Urban Outfitters bags on the walls.

Favorite thing in your home?

My couches. They mean so much to me. I invested so much in them.

Where do you spend the most time in your home?

I spend a lot of time upstairs in my bed, because I like to create on my computer upstairs.

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Any new hobbies?

Button making, for sure! I used to collect buttons and patches. I was like, “Yo, I wanna make them myself!” So I got all these vintage magazines and I used those to make them. My mom got me the button maker as a graduation gift.

I also have been taking up graphic design to make my mix covers from time to time. I want to be my own graphic designer.

I have been doing a lot of DJ livestreams lately. I usually do them on the 27th each month.

I’ve also been dropping more mixes now. I just got hit up today to do a small Boiler Room set!

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Samuel Richardson PAINTER HE/HIM @SAMUELRICHARDSON

How has the meaning of “home” shifted for you since the pandemic?

When you’re forced into quarantine, all you have to do is scroll. Seeing other spaces made me ask myself, “Why haven’t I done that?” There’s so many ways you can hack it. We don’t have a ton of money, but we can make stuff look good on a budget. You can do a little at a time drawing inspiration from other places. This is our scrapbook of Instagram houses.

When I was still a server, I was kind of depressed and would sit on the couch not really cleaning. Being an artist, you see potential and possibilities in yourself and a few of those possibilities are what we transformed this house to be. Our house is like our canvas. We can always change things and start over but it will always be a reflection of us.

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What room have you spent the most time in the last year?

Probably the living room. We got this new couch and we have broken it in so fast. It’s just nice since we have been lacking so much social interaction we can just come together in this room and talk. It’s really a meeting point. It’s the best place to decompress.

How do you think your home reflects you and Kevin?

I think because we are always seeking inspiration from other places that's what this space is. We’re always looking to do the next thing in terms of our art and make it better. I don’t like to sit on things too long and watch them stay sedentary. That’s how I paint. I don’t like to paint the same thing. I keep adding the extra level and that’s exactly what we do here keeping it new.

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What are three words that describe your home?

Lively. Vibrant. Inviting. I could go on and on...

I love this place.

What is your favorite thing in your home?

There's a red statue on our credenza upstairs.

My grandmother made it when she was 8 or 9 in an art class maybe around 1930. She realized that it was one of the most important things she would hand down to me, she knew I would really like it. I always kept it in our room where I could wake up and see it and feel inspired.

If not the sculpture, my cactus in the corner of the living room. It’s been here for a long time. It's one of my first important plants. I got it for super cheap and said “This is where it all begins.” I based everything in the house off of that. It’s moved from many rooms. It’s just a radiator of good energy for me.

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“One day we were like,let’s get chickens!’”

We had the backyard for it and we had the means to build a coup so we went for it. We raised the chicks in our bathroom until they were big enough to move into the coup. We built it last summer in the blazing heat.”

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Bobbie Allison Wilkins WEAVER & ARTIST SHE/HER @BOBBIEXALLISONX

How has the meaning of “home” shifted for you since the pandemic?

I had an apartment in the Fan area. After I graduated, I knew I didn’t want to stay in Richmond for another year. I had to find somewhere to go, but then the pandemic happened and there was no way I could travel. So I got this idea that I wanted to get a travel trailer. I asked a family friend who lives on the James River if I did find a trailer, if I could park it on their property.

She said, “I don’t know about that, but I have this boat…” She showed me it and I was like, “Heck yeah I want to live here!”

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What are the pros and cons of living on a boat?

I get motion sickness pretty easily, but it's been something to adjust to. I’ve never dropped anything except for a tupperware which I had to get out of the water, thankfully no phone or wallet.

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The pros definitely outweigh the cons. You have to be more intentional about everything you do because it's a smaller space, like I don't even have an oven. It’s very slow and intentional. I got rid of a lot of stuff. I really have tried to rid myself of the possessions. Even now I feel like I have too much stuff.

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How does coming home make you feel?

It varies, we’re all human. I usually come and my cat, Noodle is knocked out, sleeping on the bench. I can't help but feel so comforted by how happy and at home he makes it feel here.

Sometimes I feel isolated from the city after living there for four years, being around people, and everything the city offers. Sometimes it's nice to be outside of the city and being so connected to nature.

Three words that describe your home?

Floating. Magic. Slow.

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How do you think your home reflects you?

It’s unconventional, and I wouldn’t consider myself a conventional person.

There’s also a lot of details that demand to be focused on while here because everything moves so slowly.

I am a person who appreciates the small details in life.

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Monisha Mukherjee borhoods, most commonly populated When I moved to Richmond last year edgy and exactly the kind of thing

by Black and Brown people. These I fell in love with the art that seemed they expect from city-living. But for associations have caused graffiti the lower-socioeconomic communito be sprawled on every wall and ties of Richmond, this street art fever artists to be the target of demonizing street corner. I had known coming legislation. An example of this was is another piece of a larger gentrifiin that Richmond was a town filled cation agenda that is destroying their New York politician Rudy Giuliani’s with galleries and museums, like the VMFA, but I had not realized the communities and ultimately pushing “broken-window” policing which attempted to lower crime rates by extent to which artwork spilled into them out of their homes. the streets. It was as if the city itself Street art has come a long way in targeting small offenses, such as vanwas a canvas for all the creatives the public eye since its meager begin- dalism, jaywalking, public drinking, that lived there. Having grown up nings. Back in the 70’s, street art was and treating these as the gateway to violent crimes. This kind of policin suburban neighborhoods, being defined only by a much more viling likened graffiti artists to serious surrounded by so much street art was lainous name, graffiti. An important criminals causing associations of viothrilling for me. I associated street distinction to make when discussing lence and crime to grow. New Repubart with rebellion, imperfection and this issue is the perceived difference lic author, Daisy Alioto comments on the voice of people who don’t care between graffiti and murals. In RVA the perception of graffiti in the 90's about rules and bureaucracy. Moving magazine’s article “The Anti-Social in her article “How graffiti became to the city and being able to look out Socialites: AESTS’2 Richmond Grafgentrified”. Alioto writes about how my window at the vibrant murals fiti History” author Neeci explains how murals are usually much more graffiti is associated with unrest, made me feel like I was a part of the delinquents, and considered a form complex works of art while graffiti rebellious city culture. The fact that of pointless rule-breaking, not as a is associated with tags, and smaller no five-minute walk in Richmond is legitimate form of expression. This absent of a mural sighting is another decorative pieces. However, Neeci identifies that the key difference be- perception became so mainstream development in a growing list that solidifies Richmond as a creative city, tween the two is that murals are legal that graffiti artists eventually just embraced their rebellious associanot only defined by grand museums. while graffiti is not. tions. Graffiti became the language Graffiti has a long history of Every day there are new murals maof Black and Brown youth as well as terializing on the city's few remaining being associated with poverty and the counterculture. It was the perfect blank walls. To newcomers, the art is underdevelopment in urban neigh-

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INK magazine medium to express their frustration about not belonging anywhere in the commonly accepted public arts sphere. They marked walls knowing very well their work could be painted over.

During the 1990’s the concept of legal graffiti walls began, but these walls didn’t possess full murals of artwork. The walls were covered in hundreds of tags and artists, but because graffiti still carried the connotation of poverty and crime landlords and building owners painted over legal walls or got rid of them altogether.

However, the legitimacy of certain types of street art and rebellious art has increased due to popular artists like Banksy and Vhils. Today historically Black neighborhoods in Richmond like the Fan District, Shockoe Slip, and Jackson’s Ward are street art hotspots well-known for sprawling murals that cannot be avoided by any pedestrian. In recent years instead of painting over them, more building owners have extended an invite to street artists to come and paint the walls of their properties. Building owners have shifted their perspective on street art as they can utilize graffiti’s much more socially-accepted cousin, murals.

This contemporary form of street art gets to borrow the connotations of rebellion and hipster aesthetic from graffiti, that appeals to the young generations populating the city. Not only are the murals gentrifying the neighborhoods in which graffiti first appeared, but the mural art form itself is just a gentrified version of graffiti. Murals have risen to become the user-friendly version of an art form that was originally the voice of the oppressed.

From an outside perspective gentrification often seems like a good thing, as the developers like to sell it as a revitalization of the community.

The truth of the matter is far more damaging. Developers settle in these low income neighborhoods because they of the lower property value, and then change the makeup of the neighborhood for cheap, replacing smaller community businesses with

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shops and restaurants more attractive to the richer, young creatives they are trying to bring in. As the makeup of the population changes, rent prices grow, and the original population finds themselves unable to afford the neighborhoods they’ve lived in for generations.

Just as certain shops and parks are attraction items to bring in the middle class, so are murals and intricate street art. With Richmond playing host to a major art school, and with the city’s creative and social justice scene growing every day, more and more young creatives are arriving looking for housing. Commissioning street art is a very strategic way of pulling these newcomers into underdeveloped neighborhoods and driving up the property value. Having a mural painted on a building is far cheaper than building a public park, or opening an artisanal coffee shop, and still extremely effective for attracting the young middle-class creatives.

This plays into Richmond’s shift into a creative city, and the concept that free public art doesn’t exist anymore.

Rachael Schater, from Art & the Public Sphere, explains in her article ”The ugly truth: Street Art, Graffiti and the Creative City” how street art and all public art is monetized in the paradigm of the creative city.

Claire del Sorbo, from the FRESCO Collective, offers the example of how the Bushwick neighborhood in Brooklyn has followed the same pattern of gentrification that we see in Richmond, using the world renowned street art collection to attract predominantly white, young middle class creatives. Furthermore, while the bushwick collective invites artists from all over the world to paint murals the local graffiti bombers that live in the neighborhood have been excluded. As the canvas of a city is filled up with muralistic artwork, there is less and less room for traditional graffiti artists. The murals are taking away the space that once belonged to the graffiti artists just as gentrification is taking away the beloved spaces of the community.

The reality of graffiti gentrifi-

cation is undeniable. Almost every neighborhood facing the takeover of murals was once a redlined, nogo area that would have once been filled with graffiti—one of the biggest examples in Richmond being Jackson Ward, a historically black neighborhood just off VCU’s campus. An article published in the National Community Reinvestment Coalitions (NCRC)“A mixed bag in the historic Richmond, Virginia neighborhood” written by Whitehurst-Gibson and Mitchell, discusses the economic displacement by what developers call “urban renewal”. They admit that the beautification projects have raised the equity of their homes, and while some have benefitted many people have been forced to leave as they can no longer afford the neighborhood that they’ve lived in for years.

The NCRC’s statistics show that between 2000 and 2010, the median value of a home in Jackson Ward climbed more than $100,000, and in that same timeframe, 19% of the Black population had to move out.

Jackson Ward has since then become the home of many of Richmond's mural walking tours, as the neighborhood is known for its colorful walls and streets. What people don’t see are the walls of graffiti painted over for the murals, and the number of people forced to leave their homes as their communities began catering to the upper classes.

It's not surprising that the Richmond neighborhoods affected most by these changing economic demographics are, Church Hill, Jackson’s Ward, Shockoe Slip, and the rest of Downtown and the East End. According to VPM writer Katherin Komp's “Building Racial and Economic Equity in Richmond’s East End”, four of the city’s public housing communities are located in the East End, placing a lot of the lower-income Black population in that area. Komp’s article states that the East End is “88% Black, the median household income is about $34,000 and about half of residents are cost-burdened.” Komp goes on to explain how the Church Hill neighborhood is facing extreme

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gentrification, and that “between 2000 and 2015, the neighborhood saw a decrease in about 1,000 Black households, while the White population grew by nearly 160 percent.”

She writes how the increase in the white population coincided with several new shops, and pricey restaurants and cafes. According to the Richmond Mural Project, the murals found in these neighborhoods were painted between 2013 and 2014 and Komp’s article shows that housing costs grew the most in this area around the same time frame. This was an intentional way of attracting the slowly growing middle-class clientele and boosting the public perception of these neighborhoods.

It is important to recognize that murals are still a very powerful art form and can shine light on important social justice issues such as the interactive mural “Dreaming of a World Without Youth Prisons” in Downtown Richmond. The mural was designed by local highschool students in collaboration with several community organizations that

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empower youth and advocate for alternatives to incarceration.This installment demonstrates how the use of commissioned street art can be used as a tool to empower the local community.

The bottom line is, in the creative city that Richmond has become, artists need to be aware of the intentions and consequences of street art initiatives. Just as gentrification takes away the beloved spaces of a community, mural artists often take away from the space that graffiti artists have to express themselves.

Murals cannot replace graffiti, as their origins and history are completely different. While murals are often associated with beautification and revitalization, graffiti continues to be an illegal act of rebellion -the voice of the oppressed. The best example of this right now is the monument of Confederate general, Robert E Lee, which in its current state has been named by the New York Times Style Magazine as the most influential piece of protest art since World War II. What was once just another

metallic glorification of white supremacy has been completely consumed in graffiti and tags, all united in the common messages that Black Lives Matter and that white supremacy must be dismantled. The graffiti that makes the statue the work of art that it is is not meant to be pleasing to a specific socioeconomic class, it is meant to speak the truth in a place where it has been overlooked for centuries. The graffiti covered monument proves that painting a mural and tagging a wall are incomparable.

Often murals are manufactured to appeal to the creative upper and middle classes, while graffiti is raw and untempered. It is the fearless voice of the oppressed and continues to appear despite not fitting gentrified agendas. That tag on the wall means that despite the racist policing and the gentrification, their voices are still out there, and these graffiti artists will continue to have a space on the city’s canvas, despite efforts to silence them.

End

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Written by Mo K

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The discombobulation of what life has become since the pandemic is represented in everyday items. The simplest of things have taken on different meanings or have become relics of a normalcy that we cannot return to. Our outlook on life has changed immensely especially in our relationship with others. We all faced the challenge of satisfying our need for human connection amid our collective solitude. The meanings of our human connection and what we perceive as normal won't return to what they were before the pandemic and can't remain what they were during it. The future will be determined by those who can navigate these new meanings in the context of our present environment.

If we were given a dollar for every time we or someone we knew wished for things to go back to normal, there would be no need for our overdue stimulus checks. The ‘new normal’ of pandemic life has looked different for everyone. In light of this global pandemic, the unavoidable reality is that the world is not the same place it was a year ago. The shifts in attitude and lifestyle that have occurred over the course of 2020 may have taken years in regular circumstances. As vaccines roll out and the end of the worst is on the horizon, the return to normal life is just around the corner.

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However, ‘Normal’ is no longer what we knew prior to 2020. Our idea of normalcy must be recreated and to do so we need not look to the past, but rather the present.

As much as many of us would like to erase the past year of our lives, there were forces that have made a lasting impact on individuals and society as a whole. Our dependence on one another and technology has never been so interconnected, which forces us to find a new balance between physical and virtual spaces.

The structure of our lives have taken an intense deviation from the norms

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pare themselves and their lives to a vision that they’ve conjured up where the ideal conditions exist. The truth about this world is that idealized conditions can never be fully achieved no matter how hard people try. We all deserve happiness and contentment and we all can have it. The beautiful thing about the pandemic is that even with the constraints and pain it has created, it has given us all freedoms we never would have been afforded without it. It has erased life as we knew it and we had a year to slow down and reflect in a world that only seemed to be moving faster and faster. Moving forward without embracing the experiences and lessons learned from the pandemic would be a mistake. We can’t build a better future without first acknowledging the past. The new normal is upon us and it’s up to us to make it better than its predecessor.

Erasing this experience will not guarantee a better future. Embrace the little things. Appreciate the life that you have and the fact that you made it out of the pandemic. Focus on cultivating relationships with others in a way that you couldnt in the last year. Take the leap, even if there are uncertainties. That’s how you build a better normal.

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and classes the way we itch to be in-person now? The majority of you will say no, believing that the sooner the virtual days are behind you the better. While that may be true, we have changed the way we interact with each other for better or worse. It might feel like we are in the worst of it now, but feelings are only temporary. It is human nature to long for the things we can’t have, to reminisce and romanticize about that which has passed us. Who’s to say that this time will be different?

Like it or not, we’ve grown accustomed to life around a computer or phone more so than when the pandemic first began. Photos of what would now be considered superspreader events have only emphasized our collective longing for the pre-pandemic glory days. The greatest threat to our idea of normal is our obsession with highlights of our lives and our dissatisfaction with the daily.

Most people are gearing up with lists of travel plans and activities to do once things go back to “normal.”

Imagining what to do when things reopen is a premier escape mechanism from the trappings of pandemic life, but escapism is just that – an escape from reality. The sad truth is, during pre-2020 normal life, those businesses were open and our ideas were there, but we didn’t utilize them.

The freedom to explore, travel and do things will be back, but so will the obstacles that prevented people from doing them in the first place. Whether it be a job, friends, motivation - or a lack thereof – there has always been, and will always be a limiting factor. Before 2020, people were still unsatisfied with their lives; our “year ago today”’s only show us memories we thought were worth documenting which resulted in idealized and stylized snapshots of everyday life.

The fear I have for the post-pandemic world is that there will be more sadness and dissatisfaction with ourselves because the world we once knew is gone and the ones that have been created in our minds don’t exist. Technology has acted as our vision board and magic pencil this past year. I fear that people will com-

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and status quo enforced by society; institutions and social frameworks that once grounded us like school and work-life balances have been completely upended. Technology has been the cornerstone to which life now has been built upon and in doing so, has created flexibility in our schedules, space in our minds, and changed how we connect with each other. This new room in our lives - born from Covid conditions has shifted our outlook and attitude about the way we live. It will not be as easily undone by returning to our old schedules and going back to our old hangouts without masks. Precovid normalcy is obsolete. The challenge of the new normal is figuring out how to adapt to these changes in an environment unlike the one they were created in.

There is no question of the importance of the role technology played during the pandemic. Our growing dependence on it has been a trend progressing for years, but after lockdown, the internet and various devices became our lifeline to the outside world. This tied our connection to the internet to more than just our entertainment, but also our news, livelihoods, services, and each other.

The word ‘connection’ has become a double entendre. When the world was under lockdown orders, the only way we could contact, converse, or, in any way, connect with each other was facilitated through a device. The relationships we managed to maintain have been made possible because of the internet and how far it has evolved since its inception. Facetime or Facebook – which have become essential forms of communication since the pandemic started – didn’t exist in this capacity 20 years ago. Consider how different this pandemic would have looked for us without them and similar platforms. As the future of a Covid-free life gets closer and closer to becoming our present, how will we navigate the new idea of being connected to each other? Will the conveniences of filling our social battery virtually overtake the need for physical interactions? Will we long for Zoom calls

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*Introduction~ »

I BEGAN my fashion education in 2018, and I write this as I am now 21 years old; less than a year from graduating. I have always admired fashion for its ability to reflect the times as well as its ability to empower individuals and connect communities through dress. The way that we choose to dress ourselves in the morning can transform the way we feel and the way we are perceived. I chose to study fashion merchandising when I only knew the shimmering, glossy, and glamorous side of what it meant to work in fashion. Former model Alexa Chung’s Vogue webseries on the industry is what made me decide to take up fashion merchandising. However, my academic fashion curriculum and personal education have come to increasingly contradict one another, revealing a less glamorous industry behind the facade of aspirational luxury branding. Now, I fear that my relationship with fashion has been dishonest.

For a long time, I tried to look past this fact that I always knew; but it became unignorable in the wake of the Covid-19 pandemic. I was derailed from riding a high at the beginning of 2020; having just started an internship at a well known Richmond-based e-commerce business that specialized in luxury streetwear and being offered two more opportunities over the summer in New York City. I worked my very first New York Fashion Week in February after a sleepless night on an overnight bus; fueled only by stolen hotel lobby coffee upon arrival. I felt unstoppable at the start of the year.

The pandemic took everything to a screeching halt. My internship was interrupted by the national lockdown and that very business shut down within a couple months.

Over the summer of 2020, many corporations and fashion brands buckled under the weight of the pandemic.

Bankruptcies were announced one after the other from companies including Neiman Marcus, J. Crew, JCPenny, and more. Excess inventory became a crisis

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for many retailers, retailers took deep discounts on merchandise, and businesses closed left and right. While most corporations experienced some turbulence due to pandemic, many actually flourished capitalizing off of the e-commerce boom and appealing to the new habits and attitudes we formed in isolation. While many outlets reported on how hard the luxury sector was hit by the pandemic, Bernard Arnault, founder of luxury fashion conglomerate LVMH (Louis Vuitton, Dior, Givenchy, Fendi and more), who also happens to be the third richest man in the world, gained $11 billion in one November day during the largest stock market jump since April at the time. Conversely, the US unemployment rate peaked at an unprecedented level - not seen since World War II - at 14.7% according to the Congressional Research Service.

A Columbia University study also showed that over 8 million Americans began living in poverty since May. It was not the big corporations but average people who suffered the worst of it.

After having been so focussed on furthering myself in my ensuing career, fashion fell continually lower and lower in my priorities as catastrophe after catastrophe took place. Soon it became quite clear to me that so much of the chaos was the result of our system that infinitely pursued profit at the cost of the marginalized, the poor, and the planet. There is an unignorable disparity between the glamorous face fashion wears and its cost to our world. I found myself saying “I don’t care about fashion anymore,” which is a lie. This essay is not a break up letter to fashion, but more so a reckoning.

In June 2020, I began participating in a scholarship competition which I had been anticipating since my freshman year. Last year’s prompt asked participants to identify a current social issue or trend and to conceptualize a product line for a brand that related to the issue.

In the virtual interest meeting for the competition, a fellow student complained that this felt ingenuine and exploitative for the time, as Black Lives Matter protests were growing throughout the country and Coronavrius continued to cause suffering for millions across the globe. I agreed silently, but I hoped that there could be some way that I could come up with a concept that wasn’t so exploitative. Spoiler! I did not end up participating.

The largest scoring criteria would be the creativity of the idea. I struggled to think of an idea that was not exploitative without being too radical to implement. This made me wonder what creativity even meant in the context of industry and under capitalism altogether.

From this inquiry, I began investigating fashion’s relationship to capitalism. Not long after beginning the scholarship project, I read Oli Mould’s novel Against Creativity. Mould cited Marx in saying, “Capitalism does not see its limits as limits at all, only as barriers to be overcome...” Mould argues that under capitalism, creativity entails disarming challenges and turns them into fertile ground to generate more wealth and capital.

It felt as though my dilemma with this project exemplified this idea; we were essentially being asked to take the current climate which raged with movements calling for racial justice and social equity - which are at their core anti-capitalist - and to try to profit off of them.

~Forged In Fire~ Proclaiming oneself as an anti-capitalist fashion student is admittedly paradoxical. The fashion industry is arguably, more than any industry, inextricable from capitalism’s formation. There is a common saying that fashion is the favorite child of capitalism. Esther Leslie, professor of political aesthetics at the University of London writes that Marx’s “Capital”

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articulates fashion as the “very generator of the industrial revolution” with textile manufacturing’s role in worker exploitation. In this way, fashion has a very intimate relationship with capitalism.

One of the very first guiding principles you learn in fashion introduction classes is that there is a fashion cycle. In the traditional fashion cycle, trends enter through the elite innovators, moving to early adopters, early majority, late majority, and then laggards. This concept which formed the basis of my education, innately places class at the center of what fashion is. At the rise of capitalism, fashion acted as a new method for maintaining the previous feudal social relations. The fashion theory textbook, Thinking Through Fashion, cites capitalism’s disturbance of feudal-social relations as the catalyst for

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fashion to become the “competitive cycle of emulation” and “symbolic distinction between subordinate and superior classes.” While consumers are less concerned with catching up to aristocrats in 2020, this process is evident in Fashion Nova’s infamous rapid turnover of Kim Kardashian’s designer looks into affordable garments within days. We can also look to fast fashion retailer Zara, whose unique supply chain gets new trends onto the floor within weeks. The cycle is getting faster and faster hence the term “fast fashion,” which produces over 50 collections a year. But the cycle doesn’t only work one way, you also learn that trends have “trickled up from the streets to the runway”. Rather than a democratization of fashion, this idea only reminds me more of Mould’s articulation of capitalist forces appropriating creativity from the bottom to

monetize it. Understanding fashion’s intimate origins with capitalism by reading basic fashion theory and contemporary criticism have made it clear to me why so much I learned in my college years felt in some way or another injected with exploitative capitalist ideas.

~Branding & Alienation~ Branding is one of the most important pieces of fashion’s foundation and was one of the classes I enjoyed the most. I have always been somewhat of a brand loyalist and enjoyed the creative aspect of the subject. It creates a distinct image of the brand in the mind of the consumer and fosters a trusting relationship between the two. Simultaneously, branding

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has become the method that fashion uses to extract clothing from all the hands that have shaped it to become the commodity on the sales floor.

Alienation, in many ways, is the driving force for capitalism’s success. Dr. Renee Stauss says that the process in which the makers’ skills, contribution, and natural resources used in making the apparel are left out of fashion’s narrative. Reducing the product to its symbolic value is emblematic of capitalism. The product is packaged neatly with inspirational imagery and cheeky copy. In a funny way, the mystification of fashion is also embodied by mysterious designers and editors like Karl Lagerfeld and Anna Wintour who strangely are always pictured wearing sunglasses inside. This goes to show how far-reaching the mystification of fashion is.

Rarely are you shown who made your clothing, how much they were paid, where the fibers were harvested from, or what environmental and social impact your clothing has. Instead you are often only given a price tag and a sleek logo over a glamorous image.

This is symptomatic of the alienation of workers from the products of their labor and the alienation of consumers from the large chain of workers that make up the social process of production. I was taught that branding at its core is built on trust, yet its practice is so often dishonest, hiding the horrifying practices corporations take to make a profit.

~Spillover~ In fashion school, the industry’s negative social and environmental impact was not ignored, but in quite a minimizing manner, it is referred to as “spillover,” suggesting that the negative impacts of the industry are outweighed by the good, which is far from reality.

In my freshman year, and only in my freshman year, we observed “Fashion Revolution Day,” where we were educated on the tragic 2013 collapse of Rana Plaza, a clothing manufacturing facility in Bangladesh, which killed 1,134 people. Surviving workers lived to tell of the grueling conditions and unlivable wages they were paid, which

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unfortunately is a very common story.

I remember vividly at the end of the presentation being told, “this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t shop at H&M;” which baffled me. How could you show me a 40-minute documentar about a manufacturing facility tha collapsed and killed over a thousand people because of profit-driven practices and tell me that it’s okay to shop fast fashion as long as I’m aware?

Most well known apparel companies exploit off-shore labor, especially in South and Southeast Asian countries. Labor laws allow them to pay workers as little as 21 cents per hour and even lower. In “Stitched Up: The Anti Capitalist Book of Fashion,” Tansy E. Hoskins expands on the infinite pursuit of profit and pressure of competition that drives fashion companies to cut corners through cheap labor and environmental disregard. By forcing off-shore factories to accept rock bottom prices, Hoskins states that corporations have all the power to improve working conditions and salaries for garment workers. She notes that it would only take 3% of the Walton’s (Walmart family) wealth to ensure worker safety. Unfortunately, the reality is quite contrary as many apparel corporations have been known to work to maintain foreign policies that maintain low wages and a lack labor laws.

The disastrous environmental impact of the fashion industry is one of the most discussed issues in fashion at the moment, as the industry is the second biggest contributor to pollution in the world after the oil industry.

Many corporations attempt to bury their fatal practices with “sustainable fashion,” without making any substantial change in their practices.

Hoskins cites the capitalist logic of competition to be the driving force of the environmental crisis. Cutting corners to maximize profit not only falls on the backs of garment workers, but also on the planet. Environmental disregard is yet another symptom of Capitalism’s alienation. Hoskins says, “We no longer see ourselves as a part of nature rather nature is something to be gloriously conquered for profit.

~Glorious & Terrible* I read a quote from primatologist Frans de Waak in my research, stating: “You have to indoctrinate empathy out of humans to obtain extreme capitalist ideas.” I write this as a reminder of the ways that capitalism operates even in our education, preparing us to do more of the same destructive, exploitative practices.

It is important to acknowledge how these exploitative ideas are not only engraved into our industries but also our curriculums if we want to see any progress. This essay is not a historical review of fashion’s origins in capitalism, nor is it a renunciation of my educators; who have regularly encouraged and uplifted me through the years. I do not regret the path I chose. Of all of Hoskins’ words, I resonated most with her saying, “Fashion can be both oppressive and emancipating, glorious and terrible, revolutionary and reactionary, at the same time. It is inherently contradictory as is all culture and indeed all social reality.”

I love fashion, but we need to set the record straight.

The sad truth is that ethics will always take a back seat in this system.

It is difficult to imagine a system that is not driven by infinite and destructive acceleration of profit, but our imagination is so crucial to the future. It is possible to imagine a system that does not seek to create more of the same, but rather true and mutually beneficial innovation. It is possible to imagine a system that is circular and not rooted in wasteful obsolescence. It is possible to imagine a system that does not encourage endless consumption, but thoughtful investment. It is possible to imagine fashion that is rooted in consciousness of the planet and the humans that occupy it and not the wallets of the world’s richest.

I am somebody who always went the extra mile to prove myself in fashion school. I always raised my hand to talk in class, even when I had al-

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ready spoken. I always took charge on group projects, maybe stepping on a few toes. I was the partner reminding you that our project is due tonight and you haven’t finished. I took every opportunity on even when I already had a full plate. Without looking back I launched myself into my quest for individual success, but this year has pulled me back to earth. We live in a world that demands more of us every day. Every minute is optimized, monetized, and recorded. I was and am increasingly overcome by the feeling that my worth is determined by my productivity, a side effect of capitalism. Aside from all of the hardships of this year I was given the opportunity to stop, as difficult as that can be sometimes. I began to ask myself the “Why?” of it all. With my focus away from academia for a while, I returned to reading for myself. I came to these realizations while reading Jenny Odell’s “How to Do Nothing: Resisting the Attention Economy,” Oli Mould’s “Against Creativity,” fashion theory textbook “Thinking Through Fashion,” sartorial journal, “Vestoj: On Capital,” and Tansy E. Hoskins’ “Stitched Up” during isolation. My slow, quiet reflection allowed me to see with clarity. I don’t have the answers to everything, but we need to re-inject ourselves with the empathy that we have been stripped of. Teaching students only how to follow the system in place and not to lead new ideas does not breed innovation of any kind and does the opposite. Creativity for profit’s sake hinders our ability to imagine true innovation and progress.

photographers, stylists, trend forecasters, media personnel, raw textile farmers, factory workers, transportation workers, sales associates, students, and professors that allow it to operate. This machine creates beautiful things, but it huffs and puffs black smoke into the air, keeping the wealthiest warm, at the cost of the least fortunate. While this image is frightening and intimidating, the image of the machine can also teach us that there is power in the collective work. In our society, where individual resilience is valued over solidarity, moving forward I challenge us to think of the bigger picture. Now, more than ever, when the consequences of our actions reach so far and wide because of the contagious nature of the virus and the urgency to save our planet, it is imperative that we work with a collectivist mindset. If there is any lesson to learn from a year of social distancing and mass protest, it is that it takes us all to affect true change.

More times than not, in fashion school I was not taught to be an innovator, but rather a perpetuator. The principles which form the foundation of fashion education are inherently indoctrinated with capitalist ideas that perpetuate exploitation. Like many systems it is very complex, and I am aware that we as individuals are not given very much a choice but to participate. Many times I felt like a gear in the machine. It is a big complex machine that consists of millions of little gears, which include designers, marketers, finance departments,

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I PASSED a parking lot while driving around on a cloudy summer day. The kind of day where the clouds looked as if they were created by a ruined eraser. The concrete expanse stretched far and wide but was absent of the mass of cars it existed for. I stared at it as I went by, and a strange dissonance came over me. An angry driver beeped me out of my daze, probably wondering why I was staring at a parking lot as if it were a ten-car pile up. I sped off, but the image stuck in my mind. I started taking acute notice of all empty lots after this.

Stadium lots, park and rides, and even megachurch lots resonated in a way they hadn’t before. They are all places meant to foster hundreds of cars but were left desolate in pandemic lockdown. It felt disconcerting to drive by these places over and over just to see nothing. One time, after continually passing by a particular car park, I thought, “that could be a great place to fly a kite.”

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I don’t really know where the thought came from. My childhood was one without kites.

I have no recollection of flying one or even being near one, but I remember having a strong image of them in my head. Through movies, books, or the proverbial warnings to never fly a kite in a thunderstorm, they held a place in my mind.

At first it was a funny and sad thing to picture, but over time, I started to think about it more. Flying a kite in this nothingness felt like a sentimental act. It might have been an attempt to fill that emptiness. Whenever I drove around, I kept an eye out for a lot that looked like it might need a kite.

After weeks of thinking and occasionally talking about it, I walked outside, saw the trees rustling in the wind and decided that today was the day. However, despite the childish reputation of kites, I had no confidence in flying one. I looked up YouTube videos and little step-by-step instructions

before I left. Even when I got to the spot and saw the wind viciously hitting a flagpole, I thought, “My kite doesn’t stand a chance against the elements.”

My friend said, “This thing is going to get eaten alive up there.”

I told him to take the kite a little bit downwind as I held onto the line. He raised it up just over his head. The wind swirled and began to pull at the edges of the kite. Then in a moment, the kite was swept out of his hands, and began to rise with a magnetic propulsion. The string tightened. I rapidly released it and in seconds, the kite was dancing above us.

We rushed home like kids and told our roommate the success we had in the face of our own doubt; how we captured some long lost childhood magic.

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This simple accordance with nature created by just paper, sticks, and string blew us away.

Holding onto a taut line that led straight into the sky felt like we were a part of something surreal. There are no tricks, no synthetic additives, just natural principles of physics and flight. The kite becomes a part of the wind.

This harmonious act is an ephemeral as anything else. Sometimes, there won’t be enough wind, leaving the kite lying on the ground. Strong winds come and go, allowing only certain moments to join the sky. For a brief moment, we can send up an artifact among the clouds, but even then, it must be pulled back down, leaving the sky as spotless as before.

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The space just above the earth’s surface holds this romantic sense of expansiveness that inspires exploration and interaction.

We are incredibly desensitized to this unpredictable area above our heads.

Flying a kite is an expression of an innate curiosity of the unknown. The practice arose in Asia and dates back more than 2,500 years. Some of its earliest ties are to religion and spiritual practice. They were seen as metaphors for humans’ relationship with gods, and were even used as offerings. People spoke of them as an extension of the self, and in some cases, they were a form of spiritual healing. But overwhelming the kite is seen as a symbol for hope and freedom. The freedom

often assigned to birds in flight translated into the creation of kites.

At first, I only saw kite flying as an attempt to fill a space left desolate, but when I actually went out and flew one, I realized that it is also a deeply personal act. While we are stuck inside our rooms with uncontrollable external forces governing our lives, sending a vulnerable scrap of paper up into the sky feels like the right thing to do. We are in suspension. We are powerless. There is only so much we can do. A kite in flight is the opposite of suspended. It doesn’t hang motionless; it rises and moves. With it we can transcend ourselves, even if it is just for an afternoon.

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