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Dear Rescue Ranger

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you…

Do you believe in reincarnation?

Signed Livin’ La Vida Loca

Dear Kathy,

I do not, I realize that, knowing my luck, I would be reincarnated as me again!

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Signed Livin’ Loco

Dear Bubby,

If they flew over the bay they’d be called bagels!

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you

Do you ever feel like you are losing your mind?

Signed Barely Livin’

Dear Kenny,

I haven’t lost my mind half of it just wandered off, and the other half went looking for it. If I do lose my mind, I swear I’m not even going to look for it anymore.

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you

I have been putting on a few pounds. Do you have any diet tips?

Signed—Livin’ Large

Dear BoBo,

Yes your paints won’t get too tight if you don’t wear any.

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you…

In your awesome EMS career, have you ever saved a life?

Signed—

Keep ‘em

Livin’

Dear Bruce, No EMS does not save lives. God does! Our job is to entertain the patient until He makes up His mind!

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you

What is the weirdest call you ever responded to?

Signed—La Vida

Dear Kim,

Well I once responded to a local farm for a report of a fall. Turns out the owner of the farm had tripped, fell and impaled his head into his computer screen. I had to call tech support to report a FARMER IN THE DELL!

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you

One thing I have noticed about you is that you walk slowly why is that?

Signed Livin’ Lazy

Dear Sheila,

Well, if you think about it, it is kind of like comparing my life to animals a rabbit jumps, runs fast and lives about 8 years; dogs run and run and live for about 15 years; and then turtles that walk very slowly and do nothing, they live for over 150 years LESSON LEARNED!

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you

How well do you get along with your sisters?

Signed Livin’ La Family

Dear Donna,

Sometimes talking to your sisters is all the therapy you need and sometimes you need therapy after talking to your sisters.

Dear Rescue Ranger, I have a question for you…

I am applying for another job and need some resume advice?

Signed—Changn’ La Vida Loca

Dear Doug,

You need to learn to embellish just a little. For example, this is how you write “I changed a lightbulb” on your resume:

Singled-handedly managed the successful upgrade and deployment of a new environmental illumination system with zero cost overruns and no safety incidents.”