Rt july15 pgs final

POST 9/11 GI BILL If you served after September 11 2001, be informed on what you are eligibile for through the Post 9/11 GI Bill. PAGE 13

HOUSE A VET INITIATIVE: MICHAEL DUNLAP’S STORY Read about our recent “House-a-Vet” Initiative Homeowner and where he came from. PAGE 25

IN MILITARY VETERANS There are things you can do to help yourself overcome PTSD and come out the other side even stronger than before. PAGE 15

JULY 2015

VAREP NATIONAL NEWS

A Letter From Our President

ROGER THAT JULY 2015

Dear VAREP Members, I present you “RT – ROGER THAT July 2015”

EDITORIAL

E-Zine Newsletter. This is the best way for

PUBLISHER USA Homeownership, Inc. DBA Veterans Association of Real Estate Professionals

VAREP National to communicate happenings within our organization to our membership.

VAREP experienced tremendous growth and

EDITOR Denise DiSalvo

recognition in 2014 for the important work

CR E AT I VE

that we do. Each of you should be proud

GRAPHIC DESIGNER Heather Nelson

and stand tall knowing that your passion to empower veterans to realize the American Dream of homeownership has enabled VAREP to be recognized by key leaders in the real estate, financial, and government sectors as the authority on, and voice of, military and veteran financial-literacy and homeownership.

VAREP ACCOMPLISHMENTS FOR 2014 •

Five homes donated mortgage-free to deserving heroes from all across the nation.

•

$10,000 in Housing Assistance Grants donated to empower homeownership.

•

1,500+ military and veterans educated about homeownership and the VA Loan Program.

•

5,000 real estate and lending professionals were trained about all things military including the

WEB DEVELOPER Francisco Labias VIDEO PRODUCTION Matthew Martin-Hall CONTACT VAREP HEADQUARTERS 951 · 444 · 7363 info @VAREP. net 462 Corona Mall Suite 102 Corona, CA 92879 w w w . V A R E P. n e t

VA loan program as a result of the 80 live events and online membership training.

•

500 military and veteran families educated about homeownership, financial literacy, and the

ABOUT SON

VA loan program through the live Veteran Housing Summits events hosted by VAREP local

Son Nguyen is the Founder and President of the

chapters across the country.

Veterans Association of Real Estate Professionals (VAREP). Nguyen believes that homeownership

HOW TO EXPLAIN WHO WE ARE AND WHAT WE DO I frequently receive phone calls from our membership on how to explain VAREP as an organization.

and a dream that should be realized by all Americans, especially the military service members and veterans,

Depending on your audience, you may want to adapt the points listed below to introduce VAREP.

who have so valiantly served our country.

•

VAREP is a 501.c.3 nonprofit organization that was founded to directly educate the 1.4-plus

Mr. Nguyen has decades of experience in the real

million active military and 22-plus million veterans on financial-literacy, homeownership and

estate, public speaking, supplier diversity consulting,

economic opportunities that affect them.

education development and nonprofit development.

VAREP is the only organization that advocates removing barriers to military and veteran

His record speaks of innovation and leadership at

homeownership and encourages creating pro-veteran housing programs that suit the unique

the highest level. A proud U.S. Service Disabled Navy

needs of these communities.

Veteran, Mr. Nguyen holds a Bachelor’s degree in

VAREP is the only organization that increases utilization of the VA Home Loan program

Public Relations from of the University of Florida and

through direct military and veteran housing outreach events.

a Master’s degree in Organizational Management.

•

• •

VAREP is the only organization that educates military and veteran families on the importance of financial health on the road to homeownership.

•

VAREP is the only organization that educates the real estate practitioner on the important housing-policy and lending initiatives that affect the military and veteran communities.

Recently, a corporate partner asked me to compare our offerings with those of some of the national brand-name veteran service organizations in the market. The comparison chart to the right shows that we fill a much needed gap in financial-literacy and housing components that the other veteran service organizations simply do not offer…

In other words: We complement them and do not compete with them.

Our organization has only scratched the surface of creating awareness and having people rethink how to better serve underserved military and veteran housing needs. To a great 2015...Cheers!

Son Nguyen VAREP Founder and President

1

and employment is the cornerstone of our economy

VETERAN NON-PROFIT COMPARISON CHART Target Audience

VAREP Veterans = 22+ Million Active Duty = 1.4+ Million

MILITARY WARRIORS FOUNDATION Wounded Warriors OEF, OIF, ND = 51,849

OPERATION HOMEFRONT Active Duty Family of E1 - E6 = 1.1 Million

WOUNDED WARRIOR PROJECT Wounded Warriors OEF, OIF, ND = 51,849

USA CARES Post 9/11 Servicemembers & Family

Financial Assistance

X

X

Emergency Food

X

X

Emergency Home Repair

X

X

Critical Baby Items

X

X

Home and Appliance Repair

X

Furniture and Household Items

X

Local Moving Assistance

X

Apartment Transitional Housing

X

X

Permanent Housing Placement

X

X

Employment Job Board

X

Rehabilitation with Recreational Therapy

X

X

X

X

Peer-to-Peer Counseling

X

Family Support Retreats

X

Peer Mentoring

X

Information Technology Training Academy

X

Financial Literacy Education

X

X

X

VA Home Loan Program Education

X

Housing Education

X

Housing Counseling

X

Credit and Debt Management Education

X

Credit and Debt Management Counseling

X

Military and Veteran First Look Affordable Housing Purchase Program

X

Mortgage Free Donated Homes for Wounded Warrior and Spouses of Deceased Warriors

X

X

X

Community Outreach

X

X

X

Live Community Housing, Financial Literacy, and Employment Fair Outreach Events

X

REALTOR, Housing Professional, and Lender Military and Veteran Certification Course

X

Military and Veteran Friendly Database

X

Advocay with a Written Policy Plan

X Military and Veteran Housing Lending Policy

Housing and Lending Policy Conference

X

Military and Veteran Financial Literacy, Housing, and Employment Resource Center

X

X

X

X Wounded Warriors

NOTE: The non-profit comparison chart does not list the national minority real estate trade organizations including AREAA, NAHREP, and NAREB because we are not structurally set up as a trade organization. We have our membership whom we educate to better serve the military housing needs, but ultimately we are all here to serve the military and veteran communities.

2

4

Save the date!

LEADERSHIP ACADEMY

OCTOBER 18-20 · DOUBLETREE HILTON SAN DIEGO- MISSION VALLEY We cordially invite you to join our 2015 VAREP Leadership Academy from October 18-20, 2015 at the Doubletree Hilton Mission Valley in San Diego, California. The 2015 VAREP Leadership Academy will educate, develop, and empower current and future leaders within the VAREP organization. The Academy equips VAREP leaders with the necessary tools to serve the military and veteran housing needs.

REGISTRATIONS REQUIREMENTS

CONFERENCE FEES

VAREP National Board Members, State Directors, Chapter Presidents, Vice Presidents, Secretaries, and Treasurers are required to attend.

Early Online Registration Register at www.VAREP. net /LeadershipAcademy • $499 for VAREP Non-Members • FREE for VAREP Chapter Board Members • $149 for VAREP General Members

All other current chapter board members are highly encouraged to attend.

All future chapter leaders currently in chapter formation are required to attend.

All general members wanting to be future leaders are encouraged to attend.

Onsite Registration • $599 for VAREP Non-Members • FREE for VAREP Chapter Board Members • $149 for VAREP General Members

All general members wanting to better serve the military and veteran housing needs are welcome to attend.

If you would like to become a sponsor, please contact: Son Nguyen, President and Founder of VAREP 951- 444 -7359 SNguyen @VAREP. net

AVAILABLE $30,000

TITLE SPONSOR

5

LEADERSHIP AWARDS DINNER SPONSOR

KEYNOTE LUNCHEON SPONSOR

WELCOME RECEPTION SPONSOR

EXPO & NETWORKING RECEPTION SPONSOR

OVERVIEW OF EVENTS DAY 1

MVHC LIVE TRAINING CLASS & WELCOME RECEPTION

On day one of the Leadership Academy, attendees will have the opportunity to take the MVHC Live. The MVHC is designed for a comprehensive understanding of the Department of Veterans Affairs’ (VA) Home Loan Guarantee Program.

Attendees will have the opportunity to give feedback, comments, and testimonials about the MVHC course in the VAREP Video Lounge.

Day one wraps up with the Welcome Reception to network with industry leaders and other VAREP Members.

DAY 3

DAY 2

GENERAL SESSIONS, EXPO & NETWORKING RECEPTION

DOUBLE TREE HILTON SAN DIEGO - MISSION VALLEY

Day two starts with four General Sessions. Topics for the 2015 Leadership Academy have not been announced yet and we will make an announcement when our agenda for this day is finalized.

Day two wraps up with an Exposition and Networking Reception. Leadership Academy sponsors set up booths and are available for attendees to talk with.

Attendees will have the opportunity to give feedback, comments, and testimonials about the Leadership Academy.

FINAL GENERAL SESSIONS, USS MIDWAY TOUR & LEADERSHIP AWARDS DINNER

The final day closes with two more General Sessions. After the presentations, attendees are invited to attend the USS Midway Museum Tour. The USS Midway Museum is an immensely popular event venue. Its unique downtown location, convention center proximity and 360-degree panorama view make it an unparalleled venue for every occasion.

The final day of the conference will conclude with the Leadership Awards Dinner. This celebratory occasion is where VAREP acknowledges the contributions of its leadership that have supported VAREP during the inception stage.

LANYARDS SPONSOR

VAREP Room Rate: $149.00 per night plus tax Hotel Information: (619) 297-5466 7450 Hazard Center Drive San Diego, CA 92108 www.Doubletree3.Hilton.com

REGISTER TODAY! To register or book your hotel room for the Leadership Academy, please go to: www.VAREP. net /LeadershipAcademy

AVAILABLE

AVAILABLE

AVAILABLE

POCKET AGENDA SPONSOR

PHOTO BOOTH SPONSOR

TOTE BAGS SPONSOR

$7,500

MVHC CERTIFICATION CLASS SPONSOR

Our event will take place at the Double Tree Hilton in San Diego. Call or go online today to make your reservations.

Mention VAREP to get the reduced room rate price! When booking online, use the code “VET” to get the discounted rate.

$7,500

$7,500

6

MARCH ON

CAPITOL H THE 2015 VAREP POLICY CONFERENCE - IN REVIEW

VAREP’s second annual 2015 VAREP Policy Conference held in Washington DC was a huge success. The conference was filled educational topics focusing on military and veteran related topics, as well as a day dedicated to presenting the VAREP Policy Plan Paper while at Capitol Hill. Following up with last year’s Policy Conference proved that VAREP is gaining momentum in making changes.

HILL 8

IN REVIEW:

VAREP 2015 POLICY CONFERENCE

VAREP ARRIVES IN WASHINGTON DC The 2015 Policy Conference kicked off with the Welcome Reception on Sunday. VAREP Members, Staff, National and Local Chapter Board of Directors, and supporters from all across the country came together to meet in person. Dustin Luce, VAREP Co-Founder, gave a few welcoming remarks and encouraged everyone to get to know each other.

TWO HOME DONATIONS

M ic ha el Gr ot ha us - U.S. M

9

arine Veteran & Makea Ba rt on - U.S. Army Ve

teran

20 105

IN REVIEW: 2015 VAREP POLICY CONFERENCE

VAREP CHAPTERS REPRESENTED LEGISLATIVE MEETINGS

HONORING WOMEN VETERANS The day concluded with the Gala Awards Dinner. This celebratory occasion honored

MARCH ON CAPITOL HILL Day three focused on VAREP’s second mission of the Policy Conference: presenting the Policy Position Paper at Capitol Hill. Throughout the entire day, VAREP Board Members and representatives

the contributions of women who have served. Attendees were treated to a history of women in service presented by Brigadier General Wilma L. Vaught, United States Air Force, Retired.

from all across the country came together and marched on Capitol Hill to be the voice of VAREP. 20 chapters represented VAREP during 105 scheduled meetings with legislative representatives - DOUBLE the amount of appointments than the 2014 Policy Conference.

SEE YOU NEXT YEAR IN DC! JUNE 2016 www.VAREP.net/PolicyConference

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CFPB Takes Action Against NewDay Financial for Deceptive Mortgage Advertising and Kickbacks Lender to Pay $2 Million Civil Penalty for Illegal Conduct

11

CFPB ARTICLE

On February 10th 2015, the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB) took action against NewDay Financial, LLC for deceptive mortgage advertising and kickbacks.

NewDay deceived consumers about a veterans’ organization’s endorsement of NewDay products and participated in a scheme to pay kickbacks for customer referrals. NewDay will pay a $2 million civil money penalty for its actions.

“NewDay profited from the trust that veterans place in their veteran service organization,” said CFPB Director Richard Cordray. “Veterans, and any consumers getting a mortgage, deserve honest information about lender endorsements.”

NewDay is a Maryland-based, nonbank mortgage lender owned by Chrysalis Holdings, a private company. Its primary business is originating refinance mortgage loans guaranteed by the Veterans Benefits Administration. These loans are available exclusively to servicemembers, veterans, and their surviving spouses. NewDay mainly advertises its mortgage products to consumers through direct mail campaigns. Between July 2011 and July 2014, NewDay sent consumers over 50 million mortgage solicitations by postal and electronic mail.

Beginning in 2010, NewDay entered into a marketing arrangement with a veterans’ organization. The arrangement was facilitated by a broker company.

As part of that agreement, NewDay paid “lead generation fees” to the veterans’ organization and the broker company.

NewDay also paid a $15,000 monthly licensing fee to the broker company. As part of this arrangement, NewDay was named the “exclusive lender” of the veterans’ organization.

In targeted marketing to members of this veterans’ organization, NewDay stated that this title was based on its high standards for service and excellent value. At no point did NewDay disclose to consumers that the veterans’ organization had a financial relationship with NewDay. Under the circumstances, this failure to disclose the relationship constituted a deceptive act or practice, which violates the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act (Dodd-Frank Act).

The direct mail that NewDay sent contained a recommendation from the veterans’ organization to its members. The recommendation urged members to use NewDay’s products, which, together with other telephone and web-based referral activities, constituted a referral of settlement service business.

NewDay’s payments to the veterans’ organization and the coordinating company for thesereferral activities constituted illegal kickbacks in violation of the Real Estate Settlement Procedures Act (RESPA).

ENFORCEMENT ACTION Under the Dodd-Frank Act, the CFPB has the authority to take action against institutions violating federal consumer financial laws, including by engaging in unfair, deceptive, or abusive acts or practices. NewDay is ending its relationship with the veterans’ organization and the broker company.

The CFPB’s order requires that NewDay: END DECEPTIVE MARKETING NewDay may not engage in deceptive marketing related to mortgage credit products and may not assist others in making misrepresentations.

CEASE DECEPTIVE ENDORSEMENT RELATIONSHIPS NewDay may not enter into any business relationship that would involve third-party endorsements inconsistent with the Federal Trade Commission’s (FTC) guidance on endorsements and any subsequent guidance issued by the FTC or the Bureau concerning endorsements.

END KICKBACKS The consent order requires that NewDay fully comply with the law and make no payments for referrals.

PAY $2 MILLION IN CIVIL PENALTIES For its conduct, NewDay will make a $2 million penalty payment to the CFPB’s Civil Penalty Fund.

The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB) is a 21st century agency that helps consumer finance markets work by making rules more effective, by consistently and fairly enforcing those rules, and by empowering consumers to take more control over their economic lives. www.Consumerfinance.gov CFPB COMPLAINT CONTACT INFORMATION: Hours of Operation: Monday through Friday, 8am - 8pm EST Toll Free Number: (855) 411-CFPB (2372) Español: (855) 411-CFPB (2372) TTY/TDD: (855) 729-CFPB (2372) Fax Number: (855) 237-2392 Consumer Financial Protection Bureau P.O. Box 4503 Iowa City, Iowa 52244 www.Consumerfinance.gov/Complaint 12

L L I B I G 1 1 / 9 T S e Fo r l b i g i l PO E e r A u o hat Y W w o n K e r u t It’s Your Fu

Department of Veterans Affairs · Updated May 2012 13

AM I ELIGIBLE?

HOW MANY MONTHS OF ASSISTANCE CAN I RECEIVE AND HOW LONG AM I ELIGIBLE?

The Post-9/11 GI Bill is an education benefit program for individuals

Generally, you may receive up to 36 months of entitlement under the

who served on active duty after September 10, 2001.

Post-9/11 GI Bill. You will be eligible for benefits for 15 years from your

You may be eligible if you served at least 90 aggregate days on active

last period of active duty or at least 90 consecutive days.

duty* after September 10, 2001, or were honorably discharged

WHAT KIND OF TRAINING CAN I TAKE?

from active duty for a service-connected disability after serving 30 continuous days following September 10, 2001.

You can use the Post-9/11 GI Bill at colleges, universities, trade schools, and for on-the-job training, apprenticeships, and flight schools.

Note: Children of a member of the Armed Forces who died in the line of duty on or after September 11, 2001 may be eligible for Post-9/11 GI Bill benefits under the Marine Gunnery John David Fry Scholarship Program.

WHAT WILL I RECEIVE? You may receive a percentage (see chart below) of the following payment:

The following assistance is approved under the Post-9/11 GI Bill: »

Correspondence training

»

Cooperative training

»

Entrepreneurship training

»

Flight training

»

Independent and distance learning Institutions of higher learning undergraduate /graduate degrees

»

A Tuition and Fee payment paid to your school on your behalf.

» »

Licensing and certification reimbursement

»

A Books and Supplies Stipend of up to $1,000 per year

»

Vocational / technical training, non-college degree programs

»

A Monthly Housing Allowance (MHA)** that is equal to:

»

National testing reimbursement

»

On-the-job training

The basic allowance for housing (BAH) payable for the zip code

»

Tuition Assistance top-up

of your school to a military E-5 with dependents for students

»

Tutorial assistance

pursuing resident training.

»

Vocational / technical training

One-half the BAH national average for students training solely

Note: If the program you are interested in isn’t on our website, contact

by distance learning.

your State Approving Agency to see if it can be approved. A list of State

»

» »

The national average BAH for students pursuing training at

Approving Agencies is available on www.GIBill.VA.gov

CAN I TRANSFER MY ENTITLEMENT TO MY DEPENDENTS?

foreign schools.

You must be a member of the uniformed services to transfer your Individuals serving an aggregate period of

Percent of Maximum

active duty after September 10, 2001 of:

Benefit Payable

At least 36 months

100%

At least 30 continuous days and discharge

100%

unused benefits to your spouse or dependent(s). Generally, you must agree to serve four more years when transferring benefits.

WHAT IS THE YELLOW RIBBON PROGRAM? The Post-9/11 GI Bill can cover all in- state tuition and fees at public

due to service-connected disability

degree granting schools, but may not cover all private degree granting schools and out- of- state tuition. The Yellow Ribbon Program provides

At least 30 months < 36 months

90%

At least 24 months < 30 months

80%

At least 18 months < 24 months

70%

At least 12 months < 18 months

60%

At least 6 months < 12 months

50%

At least 90 days < 6 months

40%

* Includes active service as a National Guard member under title 32 U.S.C. for the purpose of organizing, administering, recruiting,

additional support in those situations. Institutions voluntarily enter into an agreement with VA to fund uncovered charges. VA matches each dollar of unmet charges the institution agrees to contribute, up to the total cost of the tuition and fees.

MORE INFORMATION & RESOURCES For more information on the Post-9/11 GI Bill and other education benefits, please visit their website at www.GIBill.VA.gov

instructing, or training and active service under section 502(f)

For news and discussions on the Post-9/11 GI Bill, Follow the

of title 32 for the purpose of responding to a national emergency.

Post-9/11 GI Bill Facebook Page at www.Facebook.com/GIBillEducation

** The Monthly Housing Allowance (MHA) is not payable to individuals on

Find participating Yellow Ribbon schools at:

active duty or those enrolled at half time or less.

www.Benefits.VA.gov/GIBill/Yellow_Ribbon.asp

14

SYMPTOMS, TREATMENT, AND THE ROAD TO RECOVERY FOR POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER Are you having a hard time readjusting to life outside the military? Are you always on edge, always on the verge of panicking or exploding, or on the flip side, do you feel emotionally numb and disconnected from your loved ones? Do you believe that you will never feel normal again?

For all too many veterans, these are common experiencesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;lingering symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It is hard living with untreated PTSD and, with long VA wait times, it is easy to get discouraged. But you can feel better, and you can start today, even while you are waiting for professional treatment. There are things you can do to help yourself overcome PTSD and come out the other side even stronger than before.

15

WHAT IS PTSD? After experiencing a severe trauma or life-threatening event, many military veterans develop symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), sometimes known as shell shock or combat stress. Close to 30% of Afghanistan and Iraq War veterans treated at VA hospitals and clinics have been diagnosed with PTSD. For veterans who saw combat, the numbers are even higher, with one Pew Research Center report showing a 49% rate of PTSD. However isolated or emotionally cut off from others you feel, it is important to know that you are not alone.

We do not know why some military personnel develop PTSD and others do not, but we do know that the incidence goes up with the number of tours and the amount of combat you experienced. This is not surprising, considering many symptoms of PTSD — like hypervigilance, hyperawareness, and adrenaline- quick reflexes — helped you survive when you were deployed.

It is only now that you are back home that these responses are inappropriate.

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS?

TREATMENT & SELF-HELP

PTSD develops differently from person to person, but there are four

PTSD is not a sign of weakness and there is no reason to blame yourself.

symptom clusters in veterans:

The only way to overcome it is to confront what happened to you and

1. Recurrent, intrusive reminders of the traumatic event, including distressing thoughts, nightmares, and flashbacks where you feel like it is happening again. Experiencing extreme emotional and physical reactions to reminders of the trauma (panic attacks, uncontrollable shaking, heart palpitations, etc.).

learn to accept it as a part of your past. This process is much easier with the guidance and support of an experienced therapist or doctor.

There are several different types of treatment for PTSD including: »

and gradually “exposing” yourself to thoughts and feelings

2. Extreme avoidance of things that remind you of the traumatic event,

that remind you of the event. Therapy also involves identifying

including people, places, people, thoughts, or situations you

distorted and irrational thoughts about the event and replacing

associate with the bad memories. Withdrawing from friends and

them with more balanced picture.

family and losing interest in everyday activities.

»

3. Negative changes in thoughts and mood, such as exaggerated

Medication, such as antidepressants, is sometimes prescribed to people with PTSD to relieve secondary symptoms of

negative beliefs about yourself or the world and persistent

depression or anxiety. While antidepressants may help you feel

feelings of fear, guilt, or shame. Diminished ability to experience

less sad, worried, or on edge, they do not treat the causes of PTSD.

positive emotions and feeling detached from others.

4. Being on guard all the time, jumpy, and emotionally reactive,

»

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) incorporates elements of cognitive-behavioral therapy with eye

as indicated by irritability, angry outbursts, reckless behavior,

movements or other forms of rhythmic, left- right stimulation,

difficulty sleeping, trouble concentrating, hypervigilance, and an

such as hand taps or sounds. These are thought to work

exaggerated start response.

by “unfreezing” the brain’s information processing system,

Sometimes these symptoms do not surface for months or years after the event or returning from deployment. They may also come and go.

If these problems will not go away or are getting worse — or they are disrupting your daily life — you may have PTSD.

17

Cognitive-behavioral therapy or “counselling” involves carefully

which is interrupted in times of extreme stress.

PTSD IN MILITARY VETERANS

HELPING YOURSELF ON THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY Many veterans suffering from PTSD have to endure long waits for professional treatment at the VA. But there are things you can do for yourself to start feeling better.

As a veteran with PTSD, the job of recovery is to transition out of the mental and emotional war zone you are still living in. It will not happen overnight, but if you take it day by day, you will soon see progress. And as you learn how to deal with your combat stress, you will also be learning skills that will translate into success in the rest of your post-war life — tools you can use for much more than overcoming PTSD. The following recovery steps can show you how to feel safe again, reconnect with others, deal with nightmares and flashbacks, cope with feelings of depression, anxiety, or guilt, and restore your sense of control.

THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY STEP 1:

CONNECT WITH OTHERS PTSD can leave you feeling disconnected and withdrawn. Instead of isolating yourself, make an effort to invest in your personal relationships. Social interaction with people who care about you is a great stress reliever and one of the most effective ways to calm your nervous system when you are in a state of hyperarousal or feeling anxious, irritable, or on edge.

Find someone you can connect with face to face — someone you can talk to for an uninterrupted period of time, someone who will listen to you without judging, criticizing, or continually being distracted by the phone or other people.

That person may be your significant other, a family member, one of your buddies from the service, or a civilian friend.

You may feel like the civilians in your life cannot understand you since they do not know what it is like to be in the military or to have seen the things you did.

People do not have to have gone through the exact same experiences to understand and relate to painful emotions and be able to offer support. What matters is that the person you are turning to cares about you, is a good listener, and is able to be there for you as a source of strength and comfort.

REMEMBER...

If you are not ready to open up about the details of what happened, that is perfectly okay.

You can talk about how you feel without going into a blow-by-blow account of events. You can also tell the other person what you need or what they can do to help, whether it is just sitting with you, listening, or doing something practical. Comfort comes from someone else understanding your emotional experience. You will also find that people who care about you welcome the opportunity to help. Listening is not a burden for them but an opportunity.

DON’T... »

Many veterans find it helpful to join a PTSD support group or to connect with other veterans or trauma survivors. Listening to others’ stories and struggles may help you feel less isolated. You can also volunteer in the community, which can help you feel more connected and useful, especially if you are not currently working.

Keep quiet because you do not want to upset others

OTHER WAYS TO CONNECT WITH OTHERS »

Keep quiet because you are worried about being a burden

»

Assume that others do not want to listen

»

Wait until you are so stressed and exhausted that you can’t benefit from help Source: National Center for PTSD

18

THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY STEP 2:

Calm Your Overstimulated Nervous System PTSD overstimulates your nervous system, leaving you amped up and on high alert all the time. While connecting with people close to you is a great way to calm yourself, it is not always practical to have a buddy close by. In these cases, you can use your senses to quickly calm your nervous system. Just as loud noises, certain smells, or the feel of sand in your clothes, for example, can instantly transport you back to the trauma of a combat zone, so too can sensory input — sights, sounds, tastes, smells, etc. — quickly calm you down. The key is to find the sensory input that works for you.

Think back to your time on deployment: what brought you comfort at the end of the day? Perhaps it was looking at photos of your family? Or maybe it was the taste of candy in a care package from home, or listening to a favorite song, or smelling a certain brand of soap or cologne? Or maybe petting an animal or the sound of wind chimes works quickly to make you feel calm and centered? Everyone responds to sensory input a little differently, so experiment to find what works best for you.

REESTABLISH SAFETY As a survivor of a war zone, you already know that the world can be a dangerous place at times. The problem with PTSD is that it makes you feel as if you are still in danger, even when you are not. That is why it is important to reestablish safety.

One of the most helpful things you can do is create your own safe place (ideally someplace close and convenient). Your safe place is where you can sit and think, relax or meditate, or work through your traumatic memories. The safe place should be a secure, private location with limited access — somewhere you do not have to worry about outside dangers or others intruding. Maybe it is your bedroom or your office. Or it could be a corner of your back yard or an isolated spot outdoors.

When you are feeling unsafe, you can retreat to this safe place and calm your overstimulated nervous system.

19

THE BENEFITS OF THE GREAT OUTDOORS Spending time in nature and pursuing outdoor activities like hiking, camping, mountain biking, rock climbing, whitewater rafting, and skiing can help veterans cope with PTSD symptoms and transition back into civilian life.

Focusing on strenuous outdoor activities can also help challenge your sense of vulnerability and help your nervous system become “unstuck” and move on from the traumatic event you experienced.

Seek out local organizations that offer outdoor recreation or teambuilding opportunities or, in the United States, check out Sierra Club Military Outdoors. This program provides service members, veterans, and their families with opportunities to get out into nature.

PTSD IN MILITARY VETERANS

THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY STEP 3:

TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY The symptoms of PTSD can be hard on your body. The effects include insomnia, fatigue, irritability, angry outbursts, concentration problems, and jumpiness. Eventually, your health will suffer. That is why if you have PTSD, one of the best things you can do is care for your body. That means putting a priority on sleep, exercise, healthy food, and relaxing activities.

You may find it very difficult to relax at first. In fact, it is common for veterans to be drawn to activities and behaviors that pump up adrenaline. After being in a combat zone, that is what feels normal. Without the rush, you feel strange or even dead inside. Things you may turn to for that familiar adrenaline rush include energy drinks, coffee, stimulant drugs, cigarettes (even if you have never smoked before), violent video games, action and horror movies, and daredevil sports. If you recognize these urges for what they are, you can make better choices that will calm and care for your body and mind.

HEALTHY HABITS FOR VETERANS WITH PTSD Exercise to burn off adrenaline. Good choices include activities that

Find safe ways to blow off steam. Pound on a punching bag, pummel a

involve the large muscles, such as running, walking, swimming, weight

pillow, go for a hard run, sing along to loud music, head to the gym for

lifting, and basketball. The benefits of exercise include reducing

a vigorous workout, go somewhere private where you can scream at

physical tension and stress, increasing energy, and decreasing symptoms

the top of your lungs, or vent in your journal or to someone you trust.

of depression and anxiety. All in all, regular exercise will make you feel better, both mentally and physically.

Support your body with a healthy diet. Eat plenty of complex carbohydrates, such as potatoes and whole grains, to support mental

Take time to rest and restore your bodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s balance. That means taking a

clarity and physical stamina. Limit processed sugars, which can

break when you are tired and avoiding the temptation to lose yourself

exacerbate mood swings and energy fluctuations.

by throwing yourself into activities. Avoid doing anything compulsively, including exercising and working.

Get plenty of sleep. Sleep deprivation exacerbates anger, irritability, and moodiness. Aim for somewhere between 7 to 9 hours of sleep each

Avoid alcohol and drugs (including nicotine). It can be tempting to turn

night. Develop a relaxing bedtime ritual (listen to calming music, take a

to drugs and alcohol to numb painful feelings and memories and get to

hot shower, watch a funny show, or read something light and entertaining)

sleep. But substance abuse can make the symptoms of PTSD worse and

and make your bedroom as soothing as possible. Use curtains to block

compound your problems. The same goes for cigarettes. If at all possible,

outside light and avoid digital clocks or electronic devices that emit

stop smoking, and seek help for drinking and drug problems.

light. If noise is a problem, try using a sound machine.

TAKE ADVANTAGE OF RELAXATION TECHNIQUES Relaxation techniques such as mindfulness meditation, tai chi, deep breathing, and progressive muscle relaxation are powerful defensive weapons against the symptoms of PTSD. Among their many benefits, they reduce stress, ease the symptoms of anxiety and depression, help you sleep better, and increase your feelings of peace and well-being. The only catch is that you need to practice your relaxation technique of choice regularly. It is like military training. You practice until it is second nature, so when the crisis comes, you are able to act quickly and decisively.

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THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY STEP 4:

RECONNECT TO WHAT YOU FEEL If you are a veteran with PTSD, it is normal to want to avoid remembering or re-experiencing what you went through.

The problem is that avoiding those memories does not make them go away. You can try to escape through fantasies, daydreams, excessive TV, video games, pornography, or drugs and alcohol, but the feelings associated with the trauma are still inside you. When you try to suppress them, the thoughts, images, and dreams can actually become more threatening and intrusive.

It is not helpful to obsess over disturbing thoughts and feelings.

Sometimes you will need to take a step back in order to take care of yourself, get through your day, and avoid retraumatizing yourself. But to heal and move on, you will need to reconnect to what you feel. While this may seem like a terrifying step, reconnecting to your feelings is the only way you will be able to experience joy in life again.

SAFELY RECONNECT TO WHAT YOU FEEL As you stop trying to numb yourself and avoid traumatic reminders, you will need to pay attention to your feelings.

Your body and emotions give you clues when you are starting to feel stressed and unsafe. These clues include: »

Feeling tense anywhere in your body »

»

Holding your breath

»

Pounding heart

»

Racing thoughts

»

Sweating, hot flashes

»

Nervous behaviors » (pacing, nail biting, picking at your skin)

Shortness of breath

Dizziness, nausea

When you pick up on these symptoms of stress, take steps to calm down before they spiral out of control. These are the times when you can take advantage of the relaxation techniques and quick stress relief strategies you have in your arsenal.

A PROGRAM FOR RECONNECTING TO YOUR FEELINGS There are many ways for you to start reconnecting to your feelings, including increasing your contact with other people and working through the trauma in therapy. Helpguide also offers a free, online program that teaches you how to reconnect to uncomfortable or disturbing emotions without becoming overwhelmed. Over time, it can make a huge difference in your ability to manage stress, balance your moods and emotions, and take back control of your life.

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PTSD IN MILITARY VETERANS

THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY STEP 5:

deal with flashbacks, nightmares & intrusive thoughts Flashbacks usually involve visual and auditory memories of the trauma you experienced. It feels as if the trauma is happening all over again so it is very important for you to accept and reassure yourself that your traumatic experience is not occurring in the present. Trauma specialists call this dual awareness.

Dual awareness is the recognition that there is a difference between your “experiencing self” and your “observing self.” On the one hand there is your internal emotional reality: you feel as if the trauma is currently happening. On the other hand, you can look to your external environment and recognize that you are safe. You are aware that despite what you are experiencing, the trauma happened in the past. It is not happening now.

TIPS FOR STRENGTHENING DUAL AWARENESS One effective technique for strengthening dual awareness is to state to yourself (either out loud or in your head) the reality of both selves. Here is a simple script you can use when you awaken from a nightmare or start to experience a flashback or intrusive thought:

“I am feeling... [panicked, frightened, overwhelmed, etc.] because I am remembering [traumatic event], but as I look around I can see that [traumatic event] is not happening right now and I’m not actually in danger.”

Other techniques that can be helpful in bringing you back to the present include tapping or touching your arms or describing your actual environment and what you see when look around.

For example, name the place where you are, the current date, and three things you see when you look around.

TIPS FOR GROUNDING YOURSELF DURING A FLASHBACK If you are starting to disassociate or experience a flashback, try using your senses to bring you back to the present and “ground” yourself. Experiment to find what method works best for you.

Movement - Move around vigorously (run in place, jump up and down, etc.); change the position of your body; rub your hands together; shake your head Touch - Splash cold water on your face; grip a piece of ice; touch or grab on to a safe object; pinch yourself; play with a Slinky, worry beads, or a stress ball Sight - Blink rapidly and firmly; visit your safe place; look around and take an inventory of what you see Sound - Turn on loud music; clap your hands or stomp your feet; talk to yourself (tell yourself you are safe, that you will be okay) Smell - Smell something that links you to the present (coffee, mouthwash, your wife’s perfume) Taste - Suck on a strong mint or chew a piece of gum; bite into something tart or spicy; drink a glass of cold water, soda, or juice 22

THE ROAD TO PTSD RECOVERY STEP 6:

work through survivor’s guilt Many veterans with PTSD struggle with difficult emotions, including survivor’s guilt. You may have seen people injured or killed, often your friends and comrades. In the heat of the moment, you do not have time to fully process these things as they happen. But later — often when you have returned home — these experiences come back to haunt you.

You may ask yourself questions such as:

Why didn’t I get hurt?

Why did I survive when others did not?

Could I have done something differently to save them?

You may end up blaming yourself for what happened and believing that your actions (or inability to act) led to someone else’s death. You may feel like others deserved to live more than you — that you are the one who should have died. This is survivor’s guilt.

PTSD IN MILITARY VETERANS

HEALING FROM SURVIVOR’S GUILT Feelings of guilt are very common among veterans. Healing from it does not mean that you will forget what happened or those who died. It also does not mean you will have no regrets. What it does mean is that you will look at your role more realistically. Remember, you are only human.

REALITY TEST QUESTIONS FOR GUILTY FEELINGS: Is the amount of responsibility you areassuming for the event reasonable?

Could you really have prevented or stopped what happened?

Could you really have reacted differently?

Are you judging your decisions based on full information about the event, or just your emotions?

Did you do your best at the time, under challenging circumstances?

Do you truly believe that if you had died, someone else would have survived?

Honestly assessing your responsibility and role can free you to move on and grieve your losses. Instead of punishing yourself, you can redirect your energy into honoring those you lost and finding ways to keep their memory alive. In those cases where you truly believe you did something wrong, you can make amends. Even when you cannot make amends directly, there is always something you can do, such as volunteering for a cause that is connected in some way to one of the friends you lost. The goal is to put your guilt to positive use, and thus transform tragedy, even in a small way, into something good.

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES Veterans Crisis Line – A confidential, free hotline for veterans and their families and friends. Call 1-800-273-8255 (Press 1) or connect via chat or text (838255).

PTSD Program Locator – Find specialized VA PTSD treatment programs near you. (U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs). Visit www.VA.gov/directory and click “PTSD Program Locator” to access this service.

Veteran Combat Call Center – A 24 / 7 hotline where you can talk with another combat veteran: 1-877-WAR-VETS (1-877-927-8387).

Help for Veterans with PTSD – Learn how to earn how to earn how to enroll for VA health care and get an assessment. (National Center for PTSD).

Visit www.PTSD.VA.gov/public and click “Get Help for PTSD” for more information.

24/7 Outreach Center for Psychological Health & Traumatic Brain Injury Get help for traumatic brain injury and other psychological health issues. Call 1-866-966-1020, email resources@dcoeoutreach.org, or connect through live chat via www.realwarriors.net/livechat (DoD’s Defense Centers of Excellence).

Military OneSource – Call 1-800-342-9647 for confidential counseling, non-medical services, and other resources for veterans and their family members.

The phone line is available 24 / 7.

Vet Centers – If you are a combat veteran or you experienced sexual trauma during your military service, you can speak with a therapist at your local Vet Center for free, without an appointment, and regardless of your enrollment status with VA. Just bring your DD214. Visit www.VA.gov/directory and click “Vet Centers” to find a location in your community.

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VAREP HOUSE A VET INITIATIVE

MICHAEL DUNLAPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S STORY On February 13th 2015, VAREP awarded Michael Dunlap with a home. He was chosen through our House-a-Vet Initiative. This program was developed to give qualified active-military, veterans, surviving spouses, first-responders, and low-to-moderate income candidates an opportunity at homeownership. Blighted homes are revitalized into bright spots within the community.

Our process creates jobs, produces responsible homeowners, and shows appreciation to our heroes.

Read about Michael Dunlapâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s story and why we chose him to be the new homeowner.

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HOUSE A VET INITIATIVE

At the age of 15, standing on the back porch of my father’s house in the winter time, I declared to my dad that I will need him to sign the papers for me to join the Marine Corps when I turned seventeen.

He just laughed and said that I will never amount to anything. I became a conqueror on my 17th birthday when the Marine recruiter drove me to my father’s employer for him to sign the waiver for my enlistment. I was on the bus to Chicago AFFEES station two hours later. My father didn’t make me a man, the Marine Corps did.

After completing boot camp in August 1976 and advanced training in September, I was assigned to Marine Corps Logistics Base Pacific in Barstow, California. It was there that I completed High School and received my Diploma. I re-enlisted in 1978 and was transferred to the Fleet Marine Force as an infantry squad leader. I served my next 4 years in the infantry, travelling on board several ships throughout the Pacific – many, many training operations. It was then that I learned the strategy and techniques of moving and readiness.

I developed a lust for staying on the move, unsure of what was over the next hill. I was doing what I believed to be what every good Marine was trained to do, and loved it. I would gladly do it over again.

When I received my Honorable Discharge in 1982, the United States was in a recession and meaningful employment was scarce.

There were lines of unemployed people at the unemployment office, lines of hungry low income people at the “Government surplus distribution” sights for free cheese / butter/and peanut butter. I was at both three to five times per week. I packed my sea bag and did what I knew to do well, start moving around. Hitch hiking around the country,

relying on the kindness of others to give me temporary work, food or shelter. I bounced from menial labor job to job, finally settling down to a pizza delivery job in Chicago.

I was then beginning to self–medicate with drugs, alcohol and gambling with whatever money I had at the time.

I was unable to fulfill a one- year lease on any apartment that I took in, usually leaving after three months or less. The longest that I did stay anywhere, was when I fell in love, got married and had a healthy baby boy named Skylar. I now had a reason to stop moving around. However, I still had the wonder lust inside me and we divorced after two years.

Keeping my son in front of my own problems, I stayed near him by living with friends. I was still unable to hold down an apartment and became a cab driver. At least I could sleep in my cab when I wasn’t working. I finally realized that car sleeping was not an example that I wanted my son to follow, I moved into my grandmother’s basement. I lived there for two years.

God bless my grandma, but I didn’t belong there.

My grandma had a huge tree stump in her backyard that I would visit nightly while everyone was asleep. There, I would pray for God to either intervene and help me change my life or take me out. I cried too many tears of asking for help to expect anyone to understand what a cold, dark lonely place that I was in.

I finally drove down the street with my window rolled down and yelled out to Him that “I don’t want to live anymore”. I had no purpose, meaning or direction to stay around any longer.

VAREP HOUSE A VET INITIATIVE

MICHAEL DUNLAP’S STORY I was at the end of my rope when I made the decision to give Florida a try. I left South Bend, Indiana in February 2011. All I had was my car and three hundred dollars. I lived in my car, worked day labor when something was available, and took sink baths at Burger King.

Then, I was answered a prayer by visiting St. Pauls United Methodist Church in Largo. From there I could provide a temporary mailing address, shower regularly, receive at least one meal a day, and sometimes work when there was work available. I did stay at a local shelter for about five days.

While bowing my head over my meal there, another Veteran approached me and told me about the Bay Pines Domiciliary Program. I visited Bay Pines and spoke with a homeless social worker. I was accepted into the homeless four- month program. There I attended vocational rehabilitation classes and worked on self- development. Part of the self- development is attending a crafts class.

I am terrible at crafts. While I was working on a craft, my sixteen-year- old son called me to let me know that his mom was getting remarried and going to Hawaii for her honeymoon.

This moved me to an entirely different level of anguish. I went back to my room, put all of my belongings on my bed and wrote a short thank you note to the nurses and staff that have helped me to this point, but I was pretty done with life at this moment. As I stood there looking at my things, swelling up I thought of my son.

What the hell kind of man would end his life and make his son’s just as miserable as his own? My son needs me. I need to get my head together and help him map out his life. But first, I had to be honest and sincere about letting her go.

I struggled for a couple of days with this, and decide to turn one of my weaknesses into a pillar of strength. I walked over to the craft center and hand crafted, painted and glazed the most beautiful ceramic pineapple that I could make. I carefully boxed it and wrote a note “keep your dreams in front of you” and sent it First Class to Julie, my ex- wife.

After successfully completing the Domiciliary Program, I was accepted into the HUDVASH program and moved into an apartment. I felt it would be a good environment for my son to also reclaim his life. I worked as a security guard for one year, got promoted and nominated for Employee of the year, and was then given the opportunity to gain employment as a job placement specialist with Service Source as a Warrior Bridge Employment Specialist. I know that I was doing ok because I no longer relied on HUDVASH to subside my rent, I was finally in a position to give back.

It was through this program that I realized that my thought process was not valuable in the civilian world – only 29-years to learn this. Living at the Domiciliary (Dom) for four months and successfully completing the rehabilitation program, I was able to face the world in a new way.

This is where I am now – I help my fellow Veterans on the path to self- sufficiency with job placement, barrier removal and connecting them to valuable resources to become contributing members of the society that they have defended. I have worked hard in this environment with a “lead by example” mentality. This is my calling. After the trials and tribulations that I incurred in my life, it all makes sense to me now.

“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in Heaven” Matthew 5:16 27

HOUSE A VET INITIATIVE

TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE

Please visit our website at www.VAREP.net and click the menu item “House a Vet Initiative”

28

“The willingness with which our young people are likely to serve in any war, no matter how justified, shall be directly proportional to how they perceive veterans of early wars were treated and appreciated by our nation.”

- George Washington

VETERANS ASSOCIATION OF REAL ESTATE PROFESSIONALS info@VAREP.net

w w w . V A R E P. n e t

951- 444 -7363