Rising from the ashes
Rome's skyline was forever changed on Monday March 23rd, 2026.
APRIL 2026
COLUMNS FEATURES
A mysterious traveler wakes up half-drowned in scrambled hashbrown and uncovers a mindblowing truth. A fictional story inspired by genuine congressional hearings; Brought to you by Mark Suroviec, M.ed.
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AdventHealth Redmond unites all their heart, lung, and vascular practitioners under one roof in their new Heart, Lung, and Vascular Institute.
This month’s Hardy Home captures the best of Georgian living with Southern traditional architecture, riverfront property, and modern amenities.
Benefits of working with a licensed funeral director
They have a wealth of knowledge--including legal requirements
They take care of all logistics, so the family can receive support from the community
They are experts in the process and save you time
They offer valuable services, like preplanning and after care
They complete continuing education to stay up-to-date on best practices and ethics
They provide support throughout the funeral process and beyond, including grief support groups
Did you know: Henderson & Sons Funeral Homes has one of the largest staffs of licensed funeral directors in Northwest Georgia, so families can be certain they are receiving the most knowledgeable, professional and supportive funeral and cremation care.
Publisher's Note
In this digital world we live in, the fire that burned down Rome’s Historic Courthouse is old news. Social media discourse has zeroed in on new targets; attention spans shrinking with every passing second as doom scrollers find new and creative ways to disagree with one another. But a constant reminder comes into view as we commute through town in the form of the torched courthouse tower, still prominently on display in our modest skyline.
I noticed the black smoke pluming from downtown as I left to pick up my youngest son from school. Then my phone started ringing with the news that the courthouse was on fire, and while the fire had just started, it was apparent the
OWNER & CEO Ian Griffin
PHOTOGRAPHERS
Ivan Felipe, Andy Calvert, Cameron Flaisch PUBLISHER V3 Publications, LLC
hello@v3collective.com
Photographer: Cameron Flaisch
Tales from the Waffle House Teleporter Volume 1
A story in the genre of choosing a path to adventure, but not to be confused with the trademarked Choose Your Own Adventure, which has venture capital-backed ownership aggressively protecting its intellectual property.
He awoke with a screeching lurch, face drowning in an ooze of cheesy hashbrown. As his lungs pulled for needed oxygen, his mind was still cloudy and forgetful.
“Sleaarrrrprghhh,” was the muffled sound escaping as the server approached.
She eyed the disheveled man in the wrinkled corduroy suit and chuckled loud enough for the entire restaurant to hear. “Splenda, when most people order something splattered, smattered, and scovered, they usually eat it with their mouth hole, not their whole face.”
The unknown man wiped away the potato-like confection with a cloth napkin, feeling the bacon grease seep into every pore. He laughed a forced laugh, the kind you halfheartedly attempt when you fear being the butt of someone else’s joke. His eyes fell to the red and black checkers of the napkin. The pattern looked familiar, but the cursive HW logo didn’t jog his memory.
“You called me Splenda?” He asked cautiously, trying to fill the widening gap in his memory. “Is that my name?”
She put a hand on her hip and belly laughed, like a Santa robot with the batteries half dead. “Darlin’, no. I call EVERYONE Splenda. Artificial sweeteners are 600 times sweeter than sugar. That’s just the kind of Northern hospitality we offer at the House de la Waffles. Want me to refill your unsweetened iced tea?”
He shook his head in dismissal and reached for his wallet to pay the bill. But something felt terribly wrong. Off. Like the feeling of pollen season, the yellow-green devil powder creates a monster booger, and you desperately need to pick it. As your finger breaches the nostril cavity in satisfying relief, you suddenly remember adults don’t pick their nose in public. He surreptitiously glanced at the name on the credit card as the server blooped payment on the portable card reader. She caught his suspicious look and added a hasty, “Listen, Sweet N’ Low, I’m gonna need to see some ID.”
Mark Suroviec, M.Ed., is the Chief Ambassador of Fun at WorkPlay Solutions, the author of Forever Sisters, and the Vice President of the Children’s Museum of Rome. He hopes you pity laugh at his humor and satire stories, especially the ones that aren’t funny.
Packed in the wallet were a dozen crisp $100 bills and a Georgia Driver’s license with the name Gre Billips. “Gre Billips,” he said softly, testing the sound of his name to his ears. It was his name, he mused, but something was still a fraction off.
Then he saw the black embossed business card tucked behind the cash and shielded his upper body to hide the discovery from the server. It read, “Ggreggg Billips | United States Space Force, Multiverse Division.” Listed on the back was a phone number for emergencies.
“Can I use your phone?”
“It’s down the hall by the restrooms, Sugar-in-the-Raw.” She said with a wink, which seemed to Gre like a twitch and a spasm battling each other in rock-paper-scissors to see who would control the server’s eyes.
Too embarrassed to ask the sugar-obsessed server for a quarter, he slid one of the one-hundred-dollar bills into the pay phone. He dialed the number and retreated into the men’s restroom, careful not to let the door shut completely on the phone cord.
Gre’s heart leaped into his human potato funnel when he heard the voice pick up after only three rings. His excitement at the victory evaporated as the prerecorded message began to play.
“Agent 5G, if you hear this message, then your mission and memory have been compromised. Find the nearest breakfast restaurant and teleport back to Earth One immediately.” After a brief pause, “before you run out of G’s.”
Earth One? Multiverse? What is going on? Gre knew those concepts from sci-fi movies, but when he opened his wallet again, there was a whist of blue-green smoke rising from the emergency card. Four out of the five G’s in Ggreggg had disappeared, and the one remaining was faded like a 1920s newspaper clipping.
“Before you run out of G’s,” he said a third time aloud, suddenly realizing the danger he was in. Would he be trapped on this terrible version of Earth with no sweet tea or Southern hospitality?
“Gre,” he heard the server yell in a wicked, sing-song voice that somehow made the name sound like three syllables. “Or should I call you, Re, as your last G is fading?”
He looked around the restaurant, desperate to escape, and weighed his options.
WHAT SHOULD OUR HERO DO NEXT?
A) Distract the server with academic journal articles linking artificial sweetener use to cancer, while he is looking for a safer exit?
B) Steal a pen from the cook and write in the missing G’s on his emergency card. Maybe this will reset the teleporter countdown timer somehow?
C) Check the walk-in freezer for evidence of a large electronic machine capable of interdimensional human travel? The freezer is a good place to look, right?
D) Pinch himself and wake up from the dream. Why would the United States government hide a teleportation device inside a waffle-themed chain restaurant?
Find out next month, unless Ian thinks this story is too stupid to continue.
Disclaimer: This story was written by Mark Suroviec, M.Ed. All people and quotations are fictional, invented by the limited imagination of the author, and do not reflect the opinions of the author, editors, Waffle House, The United States Space Force, or V3 Magazine.
Memory Care at The Spires at Berry College has been intentionally designed to provide a specialized, secure and supportive environment for those with memory loss. Every day is full of opportunities for a more connected, more purposeful way of life — not to mention expert caregivers and a progressive care curriculum.
Discover the many ways your loved one can benefit from Memory Care at The Spires:
• Family-style dining featuring multiple entrée selections with fresh, wholesome ingredients
• Dedicated horticulture therapist–led gardening programs with hands-on activities in the courtyard
• Emphasis on individualized attention and family involvement
• Secure outdoor courtyard featuring winding paths, raised garden beds and inviting seating areas
• Purposeful programming that incorporates art, music and personal interaction
• Intuitive neighborhood design promoting safety, comfort and easy navigation
ONE HEART, ONE HOSPITAL
AdventHealth Redmond’s Heart, Lung, and Vascular Institute streamlines prevention, treatment, and rehabilitation for patients and practitioners. With an even more expansive focus on heart health than before, AdventHealth Redmond continues to support Northwest Georgia heart health.
Photos By: Andy Calvert
AdventHealth Redmond’s Heart, Lung and Vascular Institute creates the new standard for optimal heart, lung and vascular treatment.
On April 14th, AdventHealth Redmond cut the ribbon for their state-of-the-art Heart, Lung and Vascular Institute. Practitioners and patients alike can look forward to a new, streamlined process where every heart receives the best quality care they have to offer.
This institute is a “one-stop for patients,” according to Heart, Lung and Vascular service line director Riley Benter. It’s the new workspace for all of their heart, lung and vascular practitioners, which means each step of the process—short of invasive procedures—will be conducted here.
Practices and treatments offered at the Heart, Lung and Vascular Institute include:
• Cardiothoracic surgery
• Vascular care
• Pulmonary care
• Cardiology/heart care
• Electrophysiology
• Imaging
• Cardiac testing
• Cardiac rehab
• Advanced Heart Care Clinic (Heart Failure Clinic)
• Anticoagulation clinic
Practitioners can plan more effectively knowing the rest of their heart health team is only a few doors away. Not only does it make their jobs easier, but patients will have the convenience of having all their care under one roof.
Beyond their standard treatment, AdventHealth Redmond continues to go above and beyond for their patients’ heart health.
Dr. Michael Ware of AdventHealth Medical Group Cardiology at Rome emphasizes the importance of taking steps toward better heart health. He advises his patients to eat a healthy diet, exercise regularly, and seek accountability for staying on track. The Heart, Lung and Vascular Institute offers several support groups and cardiac rehabilitation to help with just that.
Education is one of the first steps to better health. The institute hosts lectures on heart health, including nutritional guides, and cooking classes with take-home recipes to educate patients.
Whole-person care means AdventHealth provides complete heart care and looks after your mind and spirit, too. Its multidisciplinary approach revolves around you, so you're in expert hands at every step.
For more information, visit AdventHealth Redmond’s website: AdventHealthRedmond.com
TA Breath of Fresh Air
39 Shoals Ferry Road is a breath of fresh air, with an aura of peace and privacy like no other. This Southern traditional home overlooking the Etowah River is the ideal setting for intimate gatherings and enjoying the Georgian landscape.
text LAUREN BACHMAN | photos EMB SOLUTIONS
his two-story Southern traditional house is nestled on a peaceful stretch of Shoals Ferry Road. A truly Georgian home, with its classic yet warm style, its charm is best enjoyed alongside the beauty of the surrounding landscape.
39 Shoals Ferry Road is a breath of fresh air. It comprises nine acres with direct access to the Etowah River. Privacy and peace are never lacking here. With the wraparound porch, in-ground pool, and sunroom, owners have their choice of how to enjoy it.
The interior carries the warmth of the landscape inside with classic designs, hardwood floors, and abundant light. It consists of two levels with four beds and five baths.
The main floor is the perfect space for formal gatherings or a simple night in with family and friends. Branching off the foyer are the formal dining room and great room.
These spaces offer the perfect blend of elegance and leisure, especially with the accompanying sunroom and living room/ office space. It has multiple access points to the wraparound porch, including a “wall of windows and doors overlooking the pool, open grounds, and an original barn that adds character to the landscape.”
This floor also includes a spacious owner’s suite and bath, and an additional guest bath. The upper floor features three bedrooms, a
Jack-and-Jill bath, and an additional bath, perfect for a family or for more versatile amenities.
Owners will also have two garages at their disposal. One of these is a standalone threecar garage connected to the driveway with a path leading to the pool area. It offers a shop and plenty of storage space set aside from the home itself. A second two-car garage is attached to the house for extra convenience.
For more information, visit Hardy Realty at: https://hardyrealty.com/listing/GA/ Rome/39-Shoals-Ferry-Road-30161/225281211
To schedule a viewing, call Michele Rikard at: (770) 241-0772 (direct line) or (706) 291-4321 (office line)
Listing courtesy of Hardy Realty & Development Company 706-291-4321 office.
I got my second chance.
#1 for Hearts ER
Feeling seen can be transformative. Before her heart attack, Nichole’s physical and mental health hadn’t been her priority. But in the AdventHealth ER, the exceptional care that quickly saved Nichole’s life was delivered with such compassion that it restored her health — and her entire outlook.
“AdventHealth set me free,” says Nichole. “I’m living the life I was always meant to live.”
Northwest Georgia’s #1-rated ER team knows you have a lot of great living left to do.
