Page 1

-. 1.Major and minor constellation 5. Referring to others 9. Bob Marley was one 14. Grain tower 15. High priestess of soul Simone 16. Skyscraperpder 17. Small car, big engine 19. Great brightness 20. Indefinite location 21. Person holding a fief 23. Monty Python skit 25. Grow old 26. Under the WPIRG umbrella 33. StanfordResearch Institute 34.One-armed bandit 35. Dawn 36. Photographs 38. Brushed aside 41. Fourth dimension 42. Fire residue 44. Saintly light 46. Marble shooter 47. Very small pony 51. After the manner 52. In the middle of 53. German pennies 58. Sun to colour 62. Targeted 63. Thumb property 65. Dirk Pitt author 66. Chinese currency Across

If you could implement any service on campus, what would it be?

"LCBO and beer store in the SLC." Luc Gallant and Paul Morin 1A computer engineering and 1A computer engineering

"We are offering free 'Spanish' sessions (restricted t o girls only)." Howie Bender and Emanuel Blum 3A political science and 2A physics

Se~tember19 solution

"Improve administrative services." Alina Gupta and Janelle Barbosa

"Open underground tunnels." Bhupesh Gulati 2A engineering

2A optometry and 2A arts

67. Shakespeareanking 68. Organic compound 69. PEI redhead 70. Eyeinfection

Down 1. Old Russta 2. Edble frut 3. Work hard 4. Greekverb tense 5. Entangles 6. N e n ous mttchlng 7. P1ckJ 8. Lasso 9. People who ng 10.Capable 11.Mneral deposit 12. Scarlett's house 13. Prayer finale 18. Alcohohc 22. Fowl product 24. Catvocahsauon 26. Everyone on March 17 27. Corner

28. In lieu of 29. Extinguished 30. Tories and Alliance? 31. American felines 32. Be sick 33. Resort hotels 37. Series of exercises 39. Intermediateinsect 40. Brass instrument 43. Defamation 45. Indigo dyes 48. Cassius Ciay 49. ToyotaMotor headquarters 50. Models of excellence 53. Rate ofwallung 54. Son 55. Expel gases 56. TIFF ballet film star 57. A spider's web 59. Assist a crime 60. Potter's material 61. Not there 64. Sweeping film shot nmoogksoulis@imprint.uwaterloo.c

A celestial kick in the teeth Sagittarius (November 22 to December 21)


This week's horoscope Your birthday is today

"Seat service in class: push a button, someone serves you." Tim Harris

"Health Services offering 'oral expression'courses." Luke Allen 4N business (Wilfrid Laurier)

2A political science

Your professorwillcatch you reading Imprint during class and kick you out. While wandering the halls aimlessly you will break your leg, lose your job, fail the term and die poor and alone. Happy Birthday! Libra (September 23 to October 22)

Your indecision on which assignment to do first willlead to procrastination and partymg. You wdl complete the assignment in a drunken stupor and wake up involved in a threesome with your TA. Scorpio (October 23 to November 21

"Free bus transportation." Matthew Skala

"Larger RideSafe area." Shaweta Singla

3rd year computer science graduate studies

1A math accounting

The stars' formation on Saturday will ensure that you'll experience the disappointment of a lifetime. O n Sunday the situation will improve somewhat and you should regain feeling in your left leg by early next week.

Your adventurous mind will lead to your finding your pants in someone else's freezer. Growingconcerns of frostbite on your genitaliawdl cause you to re-evaluate your plans this Friday night. Capricorn (December 22 to January 19)

Walking home will be interrupted by a short visit to your neighbour's son's dog house. Maxwill share some AlpoTM to relieve the post-bar munchies. Your stomach will not appreciate the change in diet and you will pray to the porcelain god. Aquarius (January 20 t o February


While savinga friend from drowning, a sudden attraction willripple the dynamic of your social group. Your friends will hate and abandon you, forcingyouto seekrefugein the friendships formed at Counselling Services. Pisces (February 19 to March 20)

You will be stalked by Episcopalians who will try to recruit you to the newly formed East Asian Fanatic Episcopalian Students Feds club. Don't cry about it.

Aries (March 21 to April 19)

Your laundry will be eaten by a ram. Whde attempting to communicate with it, you butt heads and fall unconscious. Taurus (April 20 to May 20)

Entering a time machine at Conestoga Mall will result in a time shiftwhere everyone speaks Latin and Chris Edey is the Fiihrer of the known world. Gemini (May 21 to June 21)

A hottie will walk into a bank and you wdl follow. While at the bank, a robbery will be foiled by a spontaneous musical r e d t i o n of Water World. Cancer (June 22 to July 22)

After a failed attempt to rob a bank, the police will perform a strip search that reveals that you made the Guiness World Record for hairiest buttocks. Leo (July 23 to August 22)

You will have an excellent, uneventful weekend full ofpleasant surprises and contradictions. Virgo (August 23 to September 22)

You will enter a washroom this weekend where you will contract a variety of maladies including SARS and herpes. Baldness will ensue.

CECS building secures against resumes Christine Baker EDITOR-IN-CHIEF


Many students trying to drop off resumes in the CECS building were turned away Monday night by a member of the student securiq service assigned to lock up the building. Students were waiting in line to enter the bin rooms to drop off resumes for the first job posting of the term when a security person informed them that theywould have to leave. Exact figures are not available as to how many students werewaitingin line. According to OlafNaese, communication and public relations administrator for CECS, the office hours in the CECS building end at 4:30 p.m. although it remains open to students unul 8 p.m. The CECS employs a security person to be there while the b d d m g is unlocked after office hours end. At 8 p.m. on Monday September 22, the member of student security informed the students waiting in line to enter the bin rooms that the room would be closed and that they would have to leare. " k c k i n g the bin rooms] is all part

and parcel of securing the budding making sure that everythingis secure," said UW police staff SeargeantWayne Shortt. "Vhe security person] probably had no otherinstructions," saidNaese. "\Ve7ve done t h s for two terms. The problem has not occurred before." According to Sergeant Shortt, the U W police were called for assistance when "there was some difficulty" in locking up the building. Although some students had left, the officer came to the decision to allow students to place their resumes in the appropriate bins and then secure the building. "A lot of students came in Tuesday morning to let us know that they hadn't been able to hand in resumes [the night before]," saidNaese, "Everyone who came in [Tuesday], their resumes were accepted. That meant in some cases sending them off in their own packages. It's the least we could do for students." AccordmgtoNaese, the new CECS building was not designed to accommodate drop-off bins because it was hoped that the new would be operational. The bins were locatedin two meeting rooms in the basement of the


Hundreds of students lined up just before the 8 p.m. deadline for the first co-op job postmgs on Monday September 22. CECS building and the line-ups may have been due in part to the overcrowding of the rooms. "There were more things involved in the .programming [of]," saidNaese. "We had to scramble to accommodate the [application] process." Naese speculated that the double cohort and the fact that job postings \\wepclsrponrd b! a ieada!.s~nordcr to Ict proplc e r their rcsurnes ready

New affordable rental housing coming to Fischer-Hallman area Commission of townhouses prompts "improved look" at the issue Kimberly Mackhan IMPRINT STAFF

The housing plan proposal voted in by regional councillors last week requires that 25 one-bedroom townhouses be built with taxpayer subsidies on Fischer-Hallman Road North, just north of Erb Street. The proposal provides an "improved look" at housing issues and elevates the importance of housing in the context of other citywide issues. "We have a housing crisis right here in Waterloo region," saidDeborah Schlichter, a former member of the board of directors at the Ontario NonProfit Housing Association. "Many people seem to think only large cities likeToronto experiencehousingproblems and homelessness, but this isn't true." Nonetheless, these subsidized units willnot be ready until 2004. "We also have two universities and a community college that attract many students to this area," said Schlichter. "With a tight rental market and with rent costs eatingup more and more of one's income, there are increasing numbers of individuals and families that are finding themselves homeless and ha\-ing to use temporaq sheiters."

In 2001, the Waterloo Region had the third Lowest apartment vacancy rate in Canada even though taxpayers had helped to build 627 new homes. Regional councillorsexpectto construct 1,000units ofhousing by 2006; however, two precedingproposals for social housing in Waterloo were unsuccessfulin overcoming zoning barriers or other neighbourhood resistance.

"Many people think only large cities like Toronto experience homelessness, but this isn't true." -Deborah Schlichter former board member, ONPHA

Local municipalitieshave acknowedged housing as a crucial problem in their visioning development and restructuring process and the regional council is investigating "potential in-

centives that they cangive to builders of affordable housing." Afforhble housing is where tenants do not pay more than 30 per cent of gross income on rent. At present, there are over 4,000 households on "rent-geared-to-income units" waitinglists for social housing or not-forprofit housing in the Waterloo Region. For the fall term, the main concern ofUW's residencesis usually toguarantee anoffer ofresidence to &st-year students. The city's lodging licence, by-law, prohibits licences from being gven outwithin 75 metres of another licensed lodging. This by-law is not retroactive and pertains only to Classtwo lodging houses. Such accommodations generally have four or fivc inhabitants.

o An "All candidates forum" for the provincial election will be held in the Student Life Centre on Monday, September 29 at 4:30 p.m. Before you vote, be there!

may have played a part in the h e - u p . "We were caught off guard by the number of students still trying to apply for lobs when the buddingwas supposed to be closed," said Naese Inan attempt to avoid future overcrowdmgissues,the CECS added two new bln locations for the second job posung deadlme on Wednesday September 24 - at the bottom of the staircase in the main hallvay and In a separate room for$aa fBpdGtions.

As well, the CECS contacted UW p o k e to ask that securitypersonnelbe granted more dlscreuon so that students will be gwen ume to drop off thelr resumes. "Procedure has beenputmplace to keep the budding open as long as necessary to deposit resumes," sald Shortt. "It may go on unul mne or so.''

Fees double at Laurier WLU closer to deregulating business fees Kimberly Mackhan and Anne Faye IMPRINT STAFFJSPECIALTO IMPRINT

~lathematics/Bus~ness program, the jointB B A. andsclenceprogram, the hdmimstrauon Opuon, all Business In Aprd 2003,WLU's School of Bust- Diploma programs and the WLU ness and Econormcs (SBE) approved Economics program The cost of twa tender to deregulatetheundergraduuon to complete a four year degree at ate Honours Bachelor of Buslness Launerts currently set at $16,800.The Adminlstrauon (BBA) program. De- proposed deregulated fees would regula~onrefersto the process of g v - make the Launer SBE's business protng mdividual gram the fourth ~ost-secondarvmmost expensivem stitutions -cornthe province beplete controloftui"The change in hindWestern's Rition fees, without fu ition see chard Ivey government ($39,100), the academic Queen's Cornguidelines merce ($31,600) lations. O n Monpotential of and U o f T's dav, September 22, members of the students in Roman ($29,400) respecuvely. Wilfrid Lauricr financial need Laurier has acUniversity senate sacrificed." cumulated a $1.1 cast a secret ballot w t e to deregulate Dan Herman million structural deficit and theunituition fees for the President and CEO of WLUSU versiq has articuuniversity's underlated that the ingraduate business programs. crease in tuition is needed to facilitatethe successful opTheWLU senate-whichincludes administrators, professors and stu- eration of the program. Government dents - voted 35-19 in favour of regulations however make it mandaraising tuition. If the WLU Board of tory for WLU to ensure that "needsGovernors approve this decision, fu- based student aid for B.B.A. students ture B.B.A. students will have to pay isincreased by anamount equal to the 30percentofextra student fees thatis over $21,000 in tuition fees. The hike in tuition will have an effect on aca- directed to student aid." demicprograms such as the joint WLLT See DEREGULATION, page 5 B.B.A.andLWBMathprogram,U\Y


Municipal: UW breeds politicians :ontinued from cover Kimberlv Mackhan IMPRINT STAFF

Universities The University ofToronto at Scarborough has named professor Kwong-loi Shun, an adrninistrator at the University of Californiaat Berkeley, the 1-ice-presidentand principal of UTSC. LI Students from the University of Calarg-will join other students across Canadain Shinerama, a national campaign to raise money for cystic fibrosis (CF) research. Dr. Dieter Fenske, renowned professor and Chair of Inorganic Chemistryat the University of Karlsruhe (Germany),wiU deliver the annual 3M University Lectures in Chemistry at Western Ontario. Students at McMaster Universityaccustomed to the convenience of take-out containers arein for achange as their Commons cafeteriaprepares to stop using Styrofoam,which has been deemed too damaging to the environment. Q The implementation of a universal bus pass (the U-pass) at Brock University has been met with mixed feelings. Laura Fekete, a third year student commuter, has decided to take action against the U-pass, which she feelsis not the best solution to Brock's transportation issues.

Canada o PrimeMinisterJeanChretienrejected theidea Monday that he should quit ahead of schedule after the rulingLiberal Party showedoverwhelmingly that they want former FinanceMinister Paul Martin to be the new leader. Q A study by the Fraser Institute declared that Ontario is running a $4.5-billion deficit and that neither the Tories nor the Liberals have a valid plan to balance the province's books. a Billionaire George Soros, one of the world's most generous philanthropists and "the man who broke the Bank of England," is among a group of Air Canada creditors jockeying to give the troubled airline $700 million to fuel its exit from bankruptcy protection. Q AssemblyofFirst Nations leader PhilFontaine, elected on a platform of fighting native poverty, has asked Indian Affairs for almost $900,000 to set up his Ottawa office. This brings his proposed new spending total to $1.2-million. The presidents ofAfghanistan and Pakistan will be in Ottawa this week on separate visits to promote co-operation with Canada and to discuss issues facing their turbulent countries.

International o Finance minister John Manley -Canada's candidatefor the next secretarygeneralofNATO -lost his bid for the position to Dutch Foreign Minister Jaap de Hoop Scheffer. Former CEO and Chairmanof the NewYork Stock Exchange, Richard Grasso, has resigned his post after a special board meetingwas called to address the furor over his $139.5 million (US) pay and retirement package. o Many of the 46,000 Buddhist monks and nuns who reside at the JokhangTemple inTibet are findmg the influx of tourists a burden. Britain's leading academic institution, the Royal Society, backed calls this Monday for a worldwide ban on human reproductive cloning. NASA's aging Galileo spacecraft deliberately plunged into Jupiter's turbulent atmosphere yesterday, bringing a fiery conclusionto a 1Cyear, $1.5 billion (US) exploration of our solar system's largest planet and its moons.

"You have city officials tehng you different :hings because by-laws really do contradict," he ;aid, "and they're selectively enforced. That's low they get around the problems." Noting a solution to the problem, Skrzydlo juggested, "we need to clean up [the city's byaws]. Then we need to enforce them. W h c h neans that housing standards aregoing togoup md everyone's going to be happier. K'e also need :o have an appeals process in there. Sometimes situations will change and the by-laws mill no onger apply. We make by-lams easy to understand, then strictly enforce them, then make an ippeals process so you can change [the by-laws] JOU need to." Skrzydlo emphasized, "By-laws are an allmcompassing issue, of which housing is only m e small part." Another key issue to both candidates was iscalresponsibility.Accordingto Icerrigan, "one :hing that students don't really realize is that :hey're actually paying property taxes when they ?ay rent. p h e City of Waterloo] is always raising :axes on students' houses as well as those of the rest of the communiq. "We don't want to see taxes being raised in :he city, on the heads of the residents, on the neads of students." Skrzydlo agreed with the need to focus on fiscal responsibility, touching on an issue that ias been of great concern to city residents as of !ate."The City ofWaterloo signed a contract [the developmentof RIMPark] that, as near as we can tell, it didn't understand and forwhich the courts said 'you're responsible for millions of dollars.' rhat's huge. I think we need more transparency In government to prevent p~ablemslike this." Both Kerrigan and Skrzydlohave close ties to the UW student body, each carrying extensive resurnCs of campus involvement over the course 3f their university careers. "Spikey" Mike Kerrigan is best known for his position as last year's Vice-president Internal for the Federation of Students, as well as for his volunteer work as a UUJResidence Don and four-time member of the Village Orientation Committee (VOC). A charismatic representative of the Feds, Kerrigan addressed issues ranging from community involvement to religion during his tenure as vice-president. Stephen Snuggles Skrzydlo is known for his involvement with UW student government, especially where the Faculty of Mathematics is concerned.Sincehe beganhis universitycareer in the fall of 1997, Skrzydlo has served as student senator for the mathematics faculty, math student councilor for the Federation of Students, member of the Feds' board of directors, executive on the Mathematics Society, math frosh leader and orientation director. (For the curious: Snuggles is honestly Skrzydlo's legal middle name. His parents gave him the power to choose the name he wanted; when he was five years oldsnuggles was what he choseandit has stuckwith himever since. "Some

Kerrigan and Skrzydlo don their voting lists. They're so ready for this! people only know me as Snuggles," he noted, "and would not know who Stephen Skrzydlo is.") Chris Edey, president of the Federation of Students, was avdable to comment on the news that a student and an alum were running for seats on Waterloo's city council. "I think it's absolutely great," stated Edey. "We've always said that students are active members of this community and nothing demonstrates that more than students stepping up and saying they've got a solid set of ideas and they have a solid grasp of what this community needs. They're going to say, 'I care about my community, and I'm going to do things to try and make it better."'

"Some people only know me as Snuggles, and would not know who Stephen Skrzydlo is." -Snuggles Edey also commented on what it would be like to have a student or a recent alum sit at city council. "I think that having a l r e c t voice at city council, I think that would be fantastic. When youlookat it, one out of every four peoplein this city is a student. It only makes sense that, out of five councillors, you would have people who are representingthis fairly largepart ofyour community. "We have a lot of competent, intelligent people at this university, and I'm really glad to see that people are stepping forward to say that what's gone onin the pastisn'tgood for the city, isn'tgood.for students,isn'tgood for anybody." When askedwhether or not the Federation of Students might endorse either of the candidates, Edey stressed the need for fairness in this situation. "I support any studentwho is standing up

and saying that they want to make a positive change," Edey stated. "As for the Federation itself, we're here to get students out and voting and promote a better deal for students overall, so it's not our position to endorse one group over another." Yaacov Iland, Feds president in 2001-2002, was also available for comment on the news. He largely applauded the efforts of Kerrigan and Skrzydlo, noting perceived benefits to having UW students run for seats on city council. "For students to really be represented in the municipality," noted Iland, "we need to make sure that there's a voice at council municipally. And for the residents,it's alsovery much to their advantage to make sure that that voice is there, because they canmake sure that they candealwith issues before they blow up." Iland also looked at the issue from a resident's point of view: "If a student is the elected representative of residents, the person has that much more time to prioritize the concerns of residents. As far as dealing with any issues, it's advantageous to the permanent residents as well." When asked if he could see any negatives to a student planning to run for city council, Iland noted, "I would just hope that whoever's runningwould be committed to serving their entire term of office. Other than that, I don't think there would be any problems withit. Particularly, Kerrigan and Skrzydlo]both have tons of experience with political and management issues. That would be something that I would want to see from any candidate." For more information on the upcoming municipal election, including where and how to vote, pay attention to coveragein future editions of Imprint. For transcripts of the interviews with Kerrigan, Skrzydlo, Edey and Iland, log on to

Exceptional children and evil the focuses of two new courses Alina Skala SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

UW's Continuing Education Office is committed to providing non-credit courses and training programs, responding to the community's educational needs and bringing C'W's expertise to the community.This week, the officeintroduced non-credit versions of two popular on campus courses-Evil, taught by ProfessorDa\ldSeljak of the psychology department at St. Jerome's University,andExceptiona1 Children, authored

by Professor Robert Seim of psychology. Seim's course aims to provide an introduction to those who interactwith exceptional children, including parents, counsellors, teachers and rehabilitation personnel. Itwill aim to cover such topics as learning and physical disabilities, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, gifted children and developmental disorders. Evil is approached from a religious studies perspective. Accorlng to the course calendar,it examines unprecedented acts of evil, from colonialism and genocide to the Holocaust. Under

Seljak, students wiU look at how various world religons define evil and how they suggest evil can be overcome. Both courses offer students a chance to expand their intellectual horizons without tests or papers, and for a fraction of the cost of the full credit versions offered on campus or by &stance education. Registration for continuing education courses runs year round. Both Evil and Exceptional Children are offered for $195, plus GST. Students cane-mail to find out more about either program.

Waterloo student housing survey goes smoothly Christine Baker



Thc Feds, in co-operation with the City of K7aterloo,conducted a housing sunreyofthe Lester-Sunvieu-neighbourhood near campus on Tuesday September 23. According to Chris Edep, Feds president, the city of Waterloo has been enthusiastic about the project after being approached in June. "They'vegiven theirresearchresources and expertise," said Edey. "It will make our results more authoritative." Around two dozen volunteers turned out to help canvas the area bounded by Lester, Columbia, Hazel and University Avenue. Accordingto Durshan Ganthan, a fourth year arts student, pairs of uolunteers were given a list of approximately 20 houses, identification badges and copies of the 13-question survey. Residents were asked questions such as "why did you chose to live here", "how long have you been livingin this residence and in this area" and "how do you feel about the student-neighbourhood relationships?'

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Catherine Moore, a 3B computer science student, gives a resident of the Lester-Sunview area the survey treatment. "Letters from the Feds and the city were mailed out a week prior [to the event] outlining what we were going to do," said Ganthan. "Most people said 'sure, they'd love to help out' but a few were adamant about not responding."

Students were able to canvas the entire area in roughly two hours. Since there is a lot of data to process, results of the survey will be available in approximately three weeks.

Provincial debate analysis Eves, Hampton, McGuinty talk education and the cost thereof Ryan Chen-Wing IMPRINT STAFF

Leaders for the three largest parties met for a showdownTuesday night in a debate that included talk about post secondary education. Howard Hampton represented the New Democratic Party, Dalton McGuinty spoke for the Liberals and Premier Ernie Eves argued for the Progressive Conservatives. When the leaders drew for positions Hampton ended up on the left of the stage, Eves on the right, McGuinty in the middle. Post-secondary funding is an important issue to students and parents concerned with the cost and value of university. In the debate Hampton had big promises for post-secondary education. "We need an educated

Maybe they they can all win the debate but only two of them will lose the election. workforce," he said, emphasizing the importance of education in society and his commitment to, "cut tuition by 10 per cent now." The NDP platform includes the reregulation of all professional and graduate programs and increased funding for universities to at least the national average. "Tuition has become an obstacle for too many families," McGuinty

said as he spoke to parents and : dents who bear the brunt ofincreasing tuition costs. The Liberals plan is to freeze tuition and to give a 50 per cent reduction to the neediest tenth of students. Eves promised to continue the five-yearcap on tuitionincreases in arts and science thatwas madein2000. He also committed to invest $2.6 bihon in capital infrastructure spending to create more spaces and a "half-billion dollar increase to base funding." In addition to education, the leaders talked about other issues of the campaign.After it all,each side claimed victorpinthe debate.Maybe they think they can all win the debate, but only two of them will lose the election.

Deregulation: business students to go bust Continued from page 3

"Deregulated tuition levels will limit the accessibilityof post-secondaryeducation" Dan Herman, president and CEO of the Wilfrid Laurier University Students' Union stated. "The change in tuition will create a two-tiered education system t h a t d see the academic potential of students in financialneed sacrificed."

Fee deregulation for the BBA programcould comeinto effect as soonas the beginning of September 2004-5 for the incoming BBA class. Current students will be exempt from the extra fees under the plan. The increase in tuition fees are to be restricted to $1,500 per year to reduce "theimpact upon student quality and accessibility." Laurier has received government permission to charge deregulated fees.

The internal decision process is still underway and it is not yet certain if deregulated fees will be charged. The choice to deregulatefees would be made for an experimentalperiod of three years, at the end of which the WLU Senatewould reconsider the fee

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UW research scientist named a "top young innovator" by MIT Kimberly Mackhan IMPRINT STAFF

MAMMOTH OOUBCE B/ff M~M~UOAT!Thursday Oct 2 'yy.

Starts at

The Technology Review 100, chosen by the magazine's editors and an elite panel of judges, included contenders from ten countries. Four of these con-

The Massachusetts Institute ofTechnology's prize-winning innovation tenderswereCanadan-basedresearchmagazine, Technology Review,has de- ers. The TR2003 list comprisedinnoclaredDanie1Gottesman as one of the vators fromerninent corporations and 100 top young inno\-ators in technol- establishments such as General Elecogy. Gottesman, a tric, HamardUniverresearch scientist at sity, HewlettPackard, IBM and U V s Perimeter In"I am more Microsoft. Contendstitute, was selected inf eresf ed in the ers are usually fromaninternational known for their inlisting of individuals scienf ific aspect vo~,ement in revo. - all under the age of 35 - whose of learning how lutionswiththequalground-breaking ity of technology in the world industries. Categowork in technologv u -. will pro\-e to have an works." ries consist of areas such as biotechnolintense influence on UWresearch scientist the earth. -Daniel Gottesman Ogy7 en"Innovation and ergy, medicine, technological change nanotechnology,telare essentialto worldecommunications wide economic growth," said Robert and transportation.Thelist, however, Buderi, editor-in-chief of Technology is not restricted to established compaReview."Now, more than ever, it's im- nies; it includes start-up businesses portant to recognize that there is no such as Ciphertrust, CombinatoRx, one technology driving the next wave NanoSys and PureTech Ventures. of success,butrather severalthat,when Gottesman specializesin research fused together, will create another era on quantum computation and quanof significant change for our society." tum cryptographyandworks oncodes

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Daniel Gottesman gets top recognition in the States. that "can correct quantum errors and protect quantum states against accidental disturbances." Quantum computation, which is still in the prime of its birth, targets hgh-speed computing. It is believed that quantum computerswill eventually solve certainmassive computing problems much faster than current-day machines. In the future, research similar to that done by Gottesman could help "revolutionize the design of drugs and new materials such as high temperature superconductors, and would be able to break widely-used encryption schemes." The 33-year-old Gottesman received a BA Summa Cum Laude from Harvard and has aPhD from Caltech. He has also servedin the UC Berkeley CS department as a Long-Term Ch1I Prize Fellowwith the Clay Mathematics Institute and has worked for the Microsoft research division. It was there that he started working on black hole evaporation before becominginterested in quantum computers. His recentwork focuses on aclass of codes called s t a b h e r codes, showing that any stabilizer code could be used to perform fault tolerant quantum computation. "I am more interested in the scientific aspect oflearning how the world works," said Gottesman in an interview with Johanna Weidner. Nonetheless, Gottesman does take time to focus on his hobbies, which include reading science fiction and fantasy, soccer andplayingbridge. The Perimeter Institute, a worldclass theoretical physics institute,u7as founded in the fall of 1999. Current U\YChancellor5like Lazarihs (former president and co-CEO c~fResearchIn hfotion) helped launch the independent research centre and dedicated a personal donation of $100 milhon to its establishment. The Perimeter Institute is ardently supported by the Government of Canada through the National Science and Engineering Research Council and the Canada Foundation for Innovation and the Government of Ontario through the Ontario Innovation Trust, Ontario Research and Development Challenge Fund and the Ministry of Enterprise, Opportunity and Innovation.


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Vote for Change! Sean Strickland and the Liberals will improve education for you: Immediately freeze college and university tuition for ALL programs for at least two years. Expand post-secondary capacity by 10% and hire new faculty to reach these 50,000 students over a four year period. Help Ontario's neediest students with tuition waivers. Increase graduate scholarships by 50 percent. Improve student aid by expanding eligibility and increasing loan limits.

Sean Strickland, BA '84 746-22 18

You have a choice, vote for a change,

vote Sean Strickland. 'Cash pr~cesareplus freight taxes, lhemeandadrnln fees "Lease paymenubasedon48 nmnUn/BO OOOkrn wjthan overage charge of O8tlk.m Payment ~ncludesfreight Taxes Imncc and aornln lee are exua Down payment or equivalent uadefw Lancer ES IS $2.698 and for MonteroLSIS $5.195

PC and NDP: the only honest choices Aaron Lee-Wudrick --

n u r n l m s don't lie: due t o tlie S 1 (I COMMUNITY EDITORIAL billion s p s e d 01 er 225 1x1c~~t.:. IIWS o n e nill lion nen- iohs have hccn creT h e p n incl:ll election nexr Tl~ursd;~! atcdin 0nt:irio. ( h e r OiI0,OO~) people n-ill hc ~ I i cfirst oppo~-tc,nit!.for the are off n,elf:irc ,rnd no\\. r e c c i ~c a in,ijorit!- o f studcnts ;ir \X:itcrlocc t o pa! cIiccjuci~lsteaiiof:in-cli-;irecliciluc. 1-otcina pro^-inci:il election. Prc\.ic~us Criuc5 ofthe I1(;gol-crnnientclaim commentators ha\-? n-eighcd in n-it11 tli,lt spcntiing cuts ha\ e harrncd otir thcir own 1-icn-s in Tup.jiit, and in this s o c ~ aprograms. l .lglin, the numbers s p e c 1 n-111malie 111) ~ i s forn-hom e I shon- the truth: spcntling o n hcalth hclicw students should 1-otc. c a r e w i s Sl'hillionin 1995. Today it In-ill spare e\-el?-one the (11-crdone stands ;it S28 billio11. I :ducatlon t i r d e s about cynical spending is also !-outh, their lon- turnat record Icl-cls. o u t o n election day and And the S16 bildemocracy as a farce. Can trust these lion "n-asted" o n Those of!vun-ho tr~il! "tax cuts for the believe democl-;ic!- is people to do ~ b ~ ~ \ what they say generated S l 6 . 5 clcad, p u t this article d o w n non-; 1 d o n ' t bilhonin rewnue. \\.is11 to disturb !~OUS they're going ,411 this said, to do? cvcnas a supporter self-fulfilling prophecics. Rut for those o f o f this g o \ - e r n y ~ u n h 1o~ i lbcx,otinii, l tucnt, I clc~n'tcl:i~in anti h'11-e lxcpt a n (,pet1 tI1ci1-rccordisperininti. I c 1ffc1-the tr~:!i)n-irgad\-ice. tcct. L<utperfection 111 ~ X J ~ ~;.;~n<)r I C S . Poiitici i\ n d i m l , ~ ~ s i r ~ eIn~ s,111 onI\ 11~113o~>il)!c.I~~1t ~1ni-c~1li~tic:\1 hat cleciion, p,lrtlc\ trip thenlsel~-cs sho~ilill ~ con.iilcreii c arc the real-life rrl-ing to o f k r tile ~ i i o s ~t ) r o m i s c sti) :dtcmati\.es, the tnostpcoplc. 'I'hc trick. t l ~ e r e f i ~ r c , F o r scrio~ispurpo.;es, these arc is to ask t h e q ~ ~ c s t i o can t l : I trust thesc nvo: thc Liberals, and the NDP. F o r .. ill ;>\.Yl\>it o c \ o \ \ \ l X t t'i1c> S A ) \ \ l ( . ) A Y L ~ ! ~ , o .n ~ ;.\I-\c o f < ~ > c I I ~C~L LI ~I ~~CAY g(lingto: 1filot.n hat difference doc^ m i n J tlxrt it \\-;la ~ h recklessness c of the X D P go\,ernmcnt from 1990it make what the!- promise? 199.5 that forcecl the PCs to make cuts I n 1995, Mike IIarris and the O n in the first place. tario PC:Pam-n-ereelected to amajority See PROAIISCS, page 11 go\-ernment. Supporters and detractors alike agree that the!-, b!- and large, did what they said the! \vould. They made it clear that it would n o t h e without s o m e pain: w h e n the PCs tool< o w r , the 0nt.nrio government In the September 19 was spending $1 million m o r e per edition of Undefeated, h o u r than it n-as taking in. S o they the incorrect spelling of m a d e the difficult decisions that had Barbra Streisand was t o b e made. introduced not by Cowan T h e effects o f these decisions are but by our editors. hotdydebated: is Ontario,on thewhole, better n o w than it was i n 1995? T h e


lsrael wants peace, but ... Lauren S. Breslin

ians, resulting in 8.51 people murdered and 5051 people xr-oundcd. * 1h e non- deceased Faisal ali t the rial; o f simplif!-ing a cotnpicx Hussemi, :ileading I'alcstinian s p o l e issue, rlic lrab-Ist-aeli conflict can be 1 that the (Islo rnan, ;1ni1c~)~1i1cciiin200 1jrol;en don-n 11kc rhi?: the Palestin;iccordn as a "Tsoi;in 1 lorse," explainians n-:lnt tci l i e~ 111 :in indepc.nticnt ing, "\I-hen n-c arc ashin:; ;ill the Paleshtate; the 1sr:iclis \\.ant t o 1k.e in ;i tmian forces ,lnd frictions tolook ;itthe t c r r o r i ~ t - h c state. c Ode .\grecinei~tand at other agree'1-lie clt~ci.tioni5, < ) ~ - cthe r p ~ s r10 m e n t i .IS 'iemporar! ' p r o c e d ~ ~ r cots, i.ears,n-h;itFacrc lr-s1x1:-c ;id\-ancccland/ phased goali, this means thxt n e are o r Iiindcrcd these g o d s from being atnhushiilg the Israelis and cheating realized? \Yell, consider this: Israel them. T h e god." he continuetl, n-as x m t s pe:icc, b u t has n o nilling p x r "the liberation o f Palestine from the ncr forpe:~ce. six-cr to the sea." Israeln-ants peace,:is dcmonstr;ircd Israel m n r s peace, as demonstrated in the O s l o Alccortlso f Scptcmlxr, b!- the Taba Tallis at C : m p Da\-id in 1093. In return for a promise by the 200 1. Then-prime minister E h u d P:ilestinian Authorit!- that "all future Bat-ak offered Yasses Arafat over 9>ciispiiter \ . ~ n-ould h e I m d e d without percent o f the \Yest Bank and Gaza, 1 iolencc." 1sraclga1-e the Palesti~lians n-hich n-as then the m o s t generous 40per cent oftlic\Y cstBank and Gaza Israeli concession p u t forth in the (gmnt~ngcontsolo f o w s 9-percent o f hlsrosyofthc Arab-Israeli confict. On thcir population). top ofthis, Hawk offered the Palestiti\lore sen~al-k,il)l\-, l ~ o n c \ . e rlsl-;icl , i:~nscontrol 01-er i i . i l f o f ~ c r ~ i s a l c m . , i l s o g a \ t~h ~?,tIc~tini,in~ ' tens ~ f t l ~ o ~ i - Hut Ic~xclhas n o u-illi11,qp;irtncr .;antis o f 1i1acli11iegi:n\. This :?ei:usc t r ~ t c' c1 ~i fot- p c ~ c e 'IS . c l e i n ~ ~ ~ ~ ~\\.lien, t ~ s c ~ ~ r c sccl e ~[IT-(~ tI i i n ~ > )( ~ - r m~t c()ffilt11: (:.imp I l : i ~ ~in t l 2001. .ir:ifar turned f ~ i ~inl lthe P ? t o police irs O \ \ I I p r o don-11Brnali's offer for a so\.ereigri, plc, :inti birli that tl;c P,ilestini,~ns PZrlcatinia~~ statc (scad:01-cr 9-percent n-ould :,.I\-e up rlieir tnancl;iti. to cleo f t h e i r dctnands and sh;ircil control stroy the State o f Isracl. ofJerusalem), only to launch another Rut lsrael has n o 11-illins partner round o f ~ i o l e n c e . Isr.icl \T-antr pencr. :I\ I-c.flc-(-red in return for the land conccssions :d the Isracli media. ,111o\ er~r-helming number o f Israeli writers, journalists, ammunition pro~icieii t o thein at Oslo, the Palestinians respondedn~ith academics and artists campaign constand!- for thcir g o w r n m e n t t o make 18,000 terroristattaclis o n Israeli civil-





wirhout share c a p ~ t d1np1.intis a member of thc O n r a r ~ v(,omniumn Newspaper Assoclatton (OCYX:.

conccssions to the Palestinians in hopes o f ending the 7-iolence. But Isr:iel has n o \ d i n g partner forpeace,:ls demonstrated in the Palesti~ianmeciian~hich teaches cliildrcn t o r e w r c suicide b o m b e r \ . T h e follon- in,^ is a direcr iluotc fsorn :I (;racle 8 testbook \ \ r ~ t t e nin 3002n-hich tliscusscs the jihad, orb( )I!\\-:is, +pinsr 1sr:icl: "l'hese drops o f blood that tlon- h o m > our bodics n-ill be transformed into red ficr)- shooting stars th:rt n,ill c o m e d o n n upon the heads of!-ourcnemies"(rrans1ated IJ! D r . . l r n o i ~Groiss). H o n - else is lsiael to pro^ c it 1s sincere in its quest for peace :lnd the cessation o f 1-iolence? Releasing m o r e terrorists from Israeli prisons is n o t the ansn-er. This v a s griml!- confirmed o n September o bombers 9, 20113, \\-hen h ~ suicide murdered 1 5 Isracli ci\.ilians inJcrusaIcm. It\\-as latet- revealed that the tcr I-orists\rere amt )n,g;igt-c~up ofrcccrltl\ rclcaactlpriso~~et-s. T h e 1mp:icr of t e r r o ~ - ~ somn rile Israeli piihlici.: d c \ .israting. 1 .lhcn-i\c, the I'cilcsrini;in people slio~~ltin't lx iuffcritlg as a result oi'laraeli securit\ measures. T h e question is. n - h ~ c side h is trull- committed to peace?

Thi111; :ihout 11- rhii \\-:I!. If the P:~Jeat~n~:ins IT-vreI O i,lr don-11 iJ1e11Ix a Palcstiilia~i arms, these \vci~~lii state. If lsrael were to la!- don-n their arms, there would be n o m o r e Israel.

1s deemed to be contravention ~ 1 1 t hImpnnPa policies \\1t11 respect tu OLII- code

l ~ ~ p nif~that t, mated




of etli~csand ~ourtialistic 5tandards

Next staff


Monday, September 29

;2:30p.111,. S l


i 110

Monday, October 6 l2:.3l p.111.. >I,(: I 1 I0

Next production night: Wednesday, October 1 5.31 p.m.. SL(: 11 16

Maxim: to pose or not to pose?



The belo17edBomber:a place for UK7 students to socialize,drink and dance in a relased atmosphere. Imagine my surprise when I entered the Bomber last Wednesday and I was bombarded with girls hoocheduplike theywereon electric circus. My confusion quickly lifted whenitwas brought to my attention that the Bombshelter was a stop on the Coors Light and Maxim Club Tour. The purpose of this tour is to search Canada for a new Maxim model. It consists ofgirls posing for pictures which are then posted on the Internet ( to allow people to vote. Finalists are determined by this voting process and judges choose the ultimate winner. Even moreinteresting is that the judges are randomly selected from each venue the tour visits. Coors Light drinkers fill out ballots throughout the night and at the end p f the evening five are drawn. From the se five, one wins the ( to hold a judging position at the finals. I asked the Coors Light representatives if the judges were re-

stricted to men. Although they strongly disagreed, I was not surprised when the five ballots were drawn and they were all guys. This could be attributed to many things: grls were too busy posingto be interested in the judging contest, girls aren't dumb enough to buy the promoted beer just for a chance to judge, or the companies involved have decided it is more appealing for men to judge women. It is apparent in our socieq that beauty is highly sought after and sex sclls. So, the combination of these two factors in a magazine like Maxim is expected. After all, guys need something to jack off to and Maxim is more coffee table worthy than Playboy since it actually contains articles andless nudity. What irkedme about this eventis its obvious objectification ofwomen. As the girls posed, the guys ogled and non-participating girls frowned on those involved. Itwas quite the fiasco, and after using that term when asking a Coors Lightrepresentative for Imprint photo opportunities he quicklydeclined - I guess he was a little concerned about the slant I might take. Initially,Iwas completelydisgusted, but I decided to give it a shot just for curiosity's sake. Sure, mj7 attire lacked sparkles and cleavage but I figured that I could have some funwith t h s opportunity (for journalism's sake, of course) in my traditional Bomber garb. So, yes, Iposed-Igiggledwith the photographer and my on-loolung friends. But did I feelobjectified?Yes, I did. Even with my nonchalant atti-

tude and my relaxed clothing I felt awkward. I felt that my worthiness would be determined based on my appearanceand, since I was not decked out in heels and the like, I was somehow beneath those that were ludicrous. Some chose to participate in this event and others didn't but all women at the barwere objectifiedregardlessof their decision. Those who were photographed might say that they willingly chose to do so, however their outfits and awkward giggles between and during shots spoke louder than this defence. Athoughitwas a conscious choice, it does not mean that they were not treated as sexual objects- it can just be considered consensual objectification; while those women who declined to pose were subject to the non-consensual type: by not partaking in the promotion, a lack of selfesteem or attractiveness was assumed by spectators. Being confident in who we are as womenis veryirnportant and to flaunt it in mehums such as Maxim is one thing, but keep in mind that as strong women, we must be ourselves and not be victim to advertising images displaying societal conformity at its best. Participaung in the Coors Light Tour would have been much more beneficial and interesting if UW females offered their individuality and uniqueness rather than garnish attempts to fill the "desired" look.

The six stages of coming out




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According to Vivienne Cass' theoretical model of Homosexual Identity Formation, as different as each individual queerpersonmay be, theprocess by which they come to terms with their sexuality is often universal in pattern. K7ith so many people between the ages of 17 and 25 currently dealingwith vaning steps of the coming out process, this week I thought it appropriate to share Cass' model. The first stage, known as Identity Confusion, is when the person asks themselves, "Who am I?" As .the person begins to acknowledge that their behaviour (either physiological or emotional) is not typical of a heterosexualperson, they begn to suffer a personal conflict as their identity is called into question. In response to this identity crisis, the person can choose to react in a number ofways. For example, the person may try to ignore their feelings and refrain from further homosexual behaviour. In stage two, Identity Comparison, the person acknowledges to

themselves that they are different or that they ma_ybe queer. Feelingagreat deal of stress andisolation, the person is forced to deal with the fear associatedwith this new revelationin one of a number of ways. One way in which they might react is by devaluing homosexuality as a whole (otherwise known as internalized homophobia) or by telling themselves that they are merely going through a "phase." Of course, it is not uncommon at this stage to accept this acknowledgement and take on the attitude of, "I don't care what anyone else thinks." Identity Tolerance, the third stage in the coming-out process, begins when the person comes to terms with who they are. In t h s stage, the person knows that they are probablyLGBT/ not straight; however a certain degree of alienation still exists, as they know that the person they portray themselves to be in a social setting is not necessarilytheir true self.Atthis point, the person may seek out other queer people, either out of curiosity, a need for support or to learn more. Once the person is able to accept their identity, rather than merely tolerate it, they are ready for step four, Identity Acceptance. In this step the person mapexperience increased contact with other queer people, and perhaps look to join a specialized queer support/socialgroup. Also key in this

stage is integration into straight culture. T o do ths, one of three strategies may be adopted: continuing to "pass" as straight, non-disclosure to straight people, or limited d d o s u r e . Stage five, Identity Pride, begins with the person perceiving the world as a negative place for homosexuals. In response to this perception, the person takes on anew attitude of"I'm here, I'm queer. Get used to it!" Immersing themselves ingay culture, the person will strive to become a more visible homosexual, becoming more vocal about their attitudes as well. In the final stage, ldentity Synthesis, the person becomes far more accepting, tolerant and patient with themselves and the world around them. Accepting themselves forwho they are, they do not feel the need to announce their sexual orientation wherever they might go.Also, they no longer feel completely distrustful of straightpeople, rather they understand now that evenone has a different opinionon the subject ofhomosexuality. Finally, the person no longer associates their identipith their sexuality,but rather admits that their sexuality is merely one part of themselves. To learn more about T4uienne Cass' theoretical model, read the 'Journal of Homosexuality", 1979,44(3),2 79-235 (available at the St.Jerome 'J fibralyl

Engage in the debate FACTS OF LIFE 'The apatb of the modern voter ic the confusion of the modern reformer. " -Learned Hand speech, 1932. Sex and religion aside, nothing can heat up a conversation, create tension, or start a brawl like politics. Everyone has a cause or complaintworth arguing over, fighting for or bitchng about. So you think taxes are too high, just right or spent the wrong way. You want to see education reform, privatization or fiscalresponsibhty. Politics brings out the expert in all of us - everyone, it seems, knows the answer, knows the problem or knows it all. So if there is so much to talk about and so much to be done, why don't more people in

Praise the arts Before I d~danythingtoday I wanted to sit down andwrite aletterofpraise for Elizabeth Rogers' Community Editorial that appeared in last Friday's Iwphit, "Like it or not, UW can't live without arts." It is heartening to read such a wellwritten and thoughtful letter of support for the pursuit of aliberal arts education! I hope all arts students at this university- from ournew first years to those about tograduate- will readMs. Rogers'words and take pridein the exciting and wonderful educational experiencein which they are engaged. -Eric Breugst, assistant academic counsellor Faculg $An's, Universig 4 Waterloo BA '89,hilA '93

Social equality. . . or not? I would like to address an issue that has been a cause of agony and frustration for many Canadians and has only beengettingworsein the past couple of years. Agood friend ofmine was rushed to a nearby hospital after having unbearable chest and abdominal pains only to wait for five long hours before adoctorwas available to see her. We were told there was only one doctor -ONE! -on duty. There must have been over 40 patients in the waiting room. What has the Canadian healthcare system come to? Paying taxes to support such a poorly run public system is ridiculous. There is a grave shortage of doctors and beds and, often, for some patients, no available healthcare at all. Cutting funding to and shutting down hospitals in addition to setting low salaries for medical professionalsis the cause ofthis disgrace. Family physicians cannot be seenwhen needed. Often, patients have to wait for weeks before an appointment is made. The nearest appointment my friend could find was in a month's time! Extreme changes have to be made, evenifit means questioning the legitimacy of bureaucrats' commitment to social equality. What is social equalitywhenheart attack patients in some provinces have to wait for an hour before they are given the necessary medical attention?

Ontario vote? In the 1999 provincial election, Ontario saw a 58.3 per cent voter turnout on election night. That means that of all the people who had been enumerated, less than three in five of them voted. That pear wasn't an anomaly. Ontario, with a turnout of only 61 per cent, has the secondworst averagevoter turnout b e h d Alberta. The province has experienced a steady decline in voter turnout since a 1990 level of 64.4 per cent. Six of the provinces, the Yukon and the Northwest Territories can all boast averagevoter turnouts of over 74per cent over thelast decade. Quebec and Prince Edward Island averaged over 80 per cent over the same period. According to Joe Borgat Elections Ontario, there will be approximately 8 million eligible voters in Ontario. If only 61 per cent of them vote, that will leave 3,120,000 ballots un-cast. The lastmajoritygovernmentwas wonwith just over half that many votes. Earlier in the month, it was reported in the Globe andMailthat the leaders' debate would be held a week later than usual to avoid scheduling conflicts with popular reality TV shows such as Canadian Idol and Suruivor. Reality TV?What

Havmg pauents &em the emergencyroom 1 not soclal equahty,itreflectsa heartless healthcarc system based on fooltshness andmco~petence nothng more.

a b ~ u reality? t We should try voting where it matters. And it's not as though it's hard to educate yourself these days. The television and papers are readily available to get information (on the major parties at least). X briefinvestigation on the Internet and you can easily find out more about smaller parties and independent candidates. Although most of the coverage has gone to the three bigparties, there are nine registered parties taking part in this election- eachwith their own Website. I typed in "Ontario provincial election 2003" and seconds later, Google provided me with 40,900 hits to choose from. Consider voting as your right to engage in the political debate -comment on social issues is harder to take from someone who hasn't bothered to attempt to effect change. Our province-wide apathy may well make us pathetic bystanders in our own lives. By not voting, you hand over control of your education, your tax dollars,your health care- and anything else that you are passionate about - to total strangers who may have vastly different views than you.

Promises: Liberal election vows are hypocritical Continued from page 9

But to their credit, the NDP offers an honest and open choice: they make it clear they will raise taxes in order to increase spending. So far the choices arevery clear: for taxcuts and Clean up the forum a stronger economy, vote PC. For taxincreases, with increased program spending, but perhaps While I am all for free speech, I cannot say tha a somewhat stunted economy,vote NDP. Both I agree with what has happened to Imprint reasonable choices, depending on your indiforum. I used to read it a lot last term and whilc vidual priorities. it had its naughty members, usually it had a bi Butwhat is not a reasonable choice, byvirtue of class. of their deliberate incoherence, are the Lberals. What I have just readwas downright disgust To put it politely, this party and its leader are ing and rude. They constantly make fun of lifi beyond hypocritical, and into the realm of the choices of others and are misogynistic. Imprifi blatantly offensive. To sit in opposition to the may be a bastion of free speech; however,it alsc PCs for eight years, opposing every single one of reflects our school. And so I grudgingly ask,wh their tax cuts, and thevast majority of their other does the Iwprintforum not have a moderator?A policies,only to suddenly run on a platform that the very least take down the smut that I just sav. promises toreverse none of themis frankly quite this is a university that is accepting student under the legal age forporn-ography.Thankyo1 astonishing. If the Liberals were so opposed to all those for your consideration. tax cuts, why aren't they running on the promise of raising them back up? -Andrew Mills The answer is obvious: they aregoingto raise 4A Arts them, except they won't say so, because they know it might well cost them the election. Instead, DaltonMcGuinty andhs band of opportunistic followers are attempting to win power on the backs of the PC's policies. Let theTories All letters must include a phone do the dirty work, then take over from there. number for verification, and Ontarians, and students in particular, must not should not exceed 300 words. be hoodwinked by this graceless scam. So rather than shill for one party only, I urge Letters should include the you to votewith your conscience. I may disagree author's name, year, and with the NDP - I thnk they are mistaken in program, or faculty position their understanding of how economies, and, by where applicable. extension, revenues to pay for social programs, work-and thus think that their policies would All material is subject to editing do more harm than good. But I respect their for brevity and clarity. willingness to be clear - just like the PCs about what they stand for. The opinions expressed are After all, if a party can't be honest during an strictly those of the authors, not election, how can we trust them to be honest in the opinions of Imprint. government? Aaron Lpe-Wudrick is a fourth year economics student -Nadine Kamal 4A Biology

Are vou readv for vour close-up? Feds Speaker's Corner wdl truly speak to (and for) the students Bomber]closed,"Da~~eMcDougall,Feds'direc- there's no, what I call, 'isms' attached to it. tor of marketingand communications, tells me. There's no homophobisms, there's no racisms, there's nothng like that. We're not editing for "It closed at six. We got it in there at 3:30." content. It's not a propaganda machne." It's pretty i r o n i ~that an incident which diQuite a far cry from the original booth in vided the students, Feds and administration led Toronto. It seems like every Friday night some to the postponement of a tooldesigned to bring pack of single guys are comthem all together. But Feds plaining about how women never say die, and McDougaU don't like it when they greet estimates that "it should be optheminclubs by slappingthem erational within a month, barThis is a univeron the ass. And they always ring any unforeseen circumnot too make the airwaves, right after stances." Sweet, huh? We'll have our many idiots or the guy who hasn't spoken to any Asians since SARS broke ownlittle UW Speaker's Corner! assholes here, out. For free, students can leave God bless. This probably won't make videotaped messages right outa difference to what gets reside the Feds office. The clips cordedor played here. This is a will then be shown on the "Feds university - not too many TV'which currentlyplays in the Bomber, Ground Zero and Aussie's, spliced idiots or assholes here, God bless -and the fact into the network and mercifully pre-empting that Feds Speaker's Corner requires one to be their constant rotation of the shitpile that is monitored by a marketing team should scare off MuchMusic. (no offence to Christina Agullera's the weak-willed. 60-pound bare torso, but some thngs are a little But still, good on McDougall for exercising the E.O.A. rule (or E&t Out Assholes). Some more important). So basically, it will be just like the enduring may argue that such conhtions actually equate CityTV program, with one big exception. Says the "propaganda machine" he speaks of, but McDougall, "anything gets put up as long as deep down everyone knows that you don't need

sit^ -

If you could say just one thing to the entire student populace (the federation included,) what would it be? Everydung is wonderful? Be sure to vote? The Gob show rocked? Iask becausewe allmayhave the chance soon. I am pleased as punch spiked with vermouth to reportthat Feds Speaker's Corner is comingback! Isn't that awesome? Yes, yes,yes!!! It's okay that you have no idea what I'm talking about. Back in March, for a very brief moment, a stand featuring an internal camera and a video monitor stood in the Bomber, resemblingacertainbooth at the corner of Queen and John in Toronto. Aside from some tests, it never got used -and we all know why. "We got [the booth] open the same day [the

to hear abigot's ramblings over aloudspeaker to know not to hang around with him or her very long. Long live the editing procedure! For me, the best thing about Feds Speaker's Corneris that no matterwhat you say -whether you'rewishing your best friend a happy birthday or venting your spleen over your lost $3 I;ir/pri??t fee- there'll be a faceattached to thewords.You got a problem with someone or something? Don't post ten messages on the forum under a pseudonym; showing your face makes a much sturdier impression both to your peer a u d m m and to your intended target. Of course, all oftlus excludes the toasted gentleman leaving the Bomber at 2 a.m. who decides to pull down his pants and "hang two" for the blooperreel. (That would be tahng the E.O.A. rule too literally.) In conclusion, please use this wonderful gadget. Ifyou have something you'd like to say, particularly to the Feds, by all means, do it. McDougallpromises that anew tapewill broadcast everyweekif enough students useit, and the thick-skinned Feds are always up for some comments or criticism. If you have nothing to say, just sit back and enjoy what is sure to be a charming and enlightening show. And, with the fewidiots and assholeswho have snuckinto this school safely filtered out of the footage, you can rest comfortably knowing that it is indeed the true student body uhich is speahng.

Changing light bulbs, Waterloo scores with Western ,'

OUR HOUSE The other day I was walking around campus when I decided to k t the Irqb,-intoftice to check my email (if you check your hotmail at least five times aday, please raise your hand.) After tiltering through the spam mail, which consists of porn sites and "free genericviagra" ads, I came across a forward that r e d y made me laugh. I never used to read forwards, but these mass emails really seem to try and grab your attention. Back in the day, they used to just be "make a wish and send this to 57 people of Russian decent in the next 30 seconds and your wish will come true!" emails, or those "tell us every last detail about yourself' questionnaires.

Today, forwards are cartoons and pictures both funny anddsturbing, cooleye tricks like the "Jesus blob,"and funny jokes. The forward I was sent was actually a list of answers for the joke "how many students from (enter university here) does it take to change a light bulb?" Though the answers play on the stereotypeswe hear of and often accept from each university,you can't help but laugh and say, "it's SO true!" Especially the one about UW: How many Waterloo students does it take to change a light bulb?: Five, one to design a nuclear-poweredone that never needs changmg, one to figure out how to power the rest of Waterloo using that nuclear-light bulb, two to install it, and one to write the computer program that controls the wall switch. Admit it, you laughed. You laughed and you said, "that's so true!", even though the joke doesn't relate to over half of the students at the school. Butif Iwere to stereotypeWaterloo, that

(people creating nuclear light bulbs and writing light switch code) would be exactlywhat I would describe. It's funny how even though we go to this school and probably have a broader view and opinion on the school, we can still relate to and believe our own stereotypes. So this week, 1leave you with that more stereotypes from other schools that will make you laugh (and that you might have already read before).. Enjoy!

How m a y

students does it take to change

McMaster:Two, one to change the bulb and the other to say 1oudl~how he did it as well as any Queen's student. Brock: Seven, one to change the bulb and six to throw a party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time. Guelph: Seven, one to screw it in and six to figure out how to power it on manure. Mt.AUison:Five, one to do it and four to be in the MacLean's photo of it.

a Ight bulb?

W I C : Zero, lava lamps don't burn out man! Queen's: One, but it never really gets done. He holds the bulb up and waits for the world to revolve around him.

UBC: Four, one to do it and three to translate the instructions.

U of T :Two, one to change the light bulb and

Laurier :AU of them. They make it a campus affair.

one to crack under the pressure.

Western: Five, one to change the light bulb and four to find the perfect JCREW outfit to wear for the occasion.

University ofManitoba:There's auniversityin Manitoba?




features@irnpnnt uwaterloo ca

Satisfying a feral hunger Michelle Titus IMPRINT STAFF

Entering the building brought. an immediate revival of my inner chdd. I feel like a little kid in a candy store- the sugar I cravedwas of a hfferent sort. My nostrils flare and I snort instinctively - endorphins run rampantwith the endless possibilities and inevitable satisfaction enveloping me. With an increasing heart rate and widened eyes, I search for another more lengthy fx. The first hit upon entering was merely areaction to thelifestyle's r e introduction into my world; the next dlrequire more effort. Two ques tions weremy only concerns:what would I purchase to satisfy my craving?,and most importantly, how much would it be? As I became re-familiarized with my past addiction and '


of his interest and quickly bought it. I stood at his side with envy as he took his newly acquired purchase foratry. His satisfiedgrin spokelouder than words. Quickr I grabbed the bag and held it tight hoping to momentarily fill my void.

ther of us could identify the conglomeration of music being played but we conceded its appropriateness - a sort ofwacky, urbanized elevator music. The most entertaining part were other characters floating about the show. Itwas hilarious to rationalize why some of these people were at a clothing show when their failure in the fashionworldwas displayed outwardlyin their appearance. To be creative is divine but to overuse fashion is a crime. Although I was unable to purchase any of the wonderfulltems I saw at t h s show, I was able to enjoy the experience and will prepare myself for ~tbetter next year. This event appeals to an array ofpeople,mtage lovers anddesigner slaves ahke. My only dsappointment was the lack of Puma arufacts found. Specdmng in vmtagewear I assumed that Puma would be scattered

As we left the venue - both with smiles - somehow I found peacewith mylackofpurchases. All that mattered was spending Sarah Lau the day with someone equally IMPRINTSTAFF appreciative of this addiction shopping for clothes! One ofthe hardest thlngs umversrtystudents or The Clothing Show held in anybod) ~ngeneral has trouble &scussingis sex. the Automotive Building, Ex- The taboo of all taboos.. 25 years ago! Sex 1s hibition Place of Toronto was somethlng that's so prevalentm t o d a ~'s soclety absolutely incredible. The thatx's a shame thatwe aren't experts in the field spacewas p a c k e d ~ ~ c l o t b - yet. We sull do not know a lot on the subject, ing designed by local ven- for lf we did, we wouldn't be ma misi?aak?ssiicWad getringpre@&iF dors at reasonable costs. With so man) opuons - mgon sexually transrmtted hseases. Why do we "over 200 new, never been keep making all of these mtstakes? For one, it's seen clothing designers, es- hard for many of us to talk to others about the tablished retailers and vin- topic of sex.. .well, actually, ~twould be wrong tage clothing vendors partici- to generalize that all people have trouble talking patingthereis truly something about sex. I for one, have met many boys who do not at all feel uncomfortable about shanng Atmospherewise,thevenue their bedroom affairs with even strangers. However, for a lot ofwomen, sex IS a topic was very eclectic. Surveyingour surroundings, my partner in crime that isn't as openly talked about. I speak for ' and I noted interesting aspects con- many girls when I say sex is not a t o p ~ Ic would tributing to the overall experience. First, talk to my parents about. So, the soluuon: the aroma that engulfed us was described Sunnybrook and Women's College Health as "a grandparent's house" by him and the notionwas seconded by myself.After Sclences CentremToronto has setup the Sexual we began accustomed to the aroma, ex- Health Centre onhne, specifically for young plorations began of the various booths. women to log onto and obtam informauon Clothing options were diverse;some bril- about anything and everything wlthm a hunliant and others atrocious. After strolling dred lalometre radlus of the sex and relatmnabout for a bit our ears perked up to the shps circle. Once in the site, you will find a number of sounds emitted from the speakers. Nei-

Solutions for tough troubles


euphoric options, I crashed, hard. T h s reminded me as to whv I was forced to withdraw from the fast-paced, dangerousitems -my wallet was empty. Addicuonis extremely expenswe. At first my parents conkbuted, but have now reahzed its demmental effects, thus refuslng financial asslstance. So there Iwas, surroundedbymcredlble opuons wlth no resources to purchase anythmg. Hesitantly I walked past many dealers and examned their merchandise. My companionlocated something

throughout - that was not the case. O n an optimistic note, I guess my pain was minimized due to the emittance of mj7 puma obsession. Even though this show can appeal to various styles,it is not for the weak shopper. Patience is necessary to hunt through racks. All in all, you have to be in the mood for this clothing show. So keep tabs on your budget and check out The CIothingShownext year. Forthose with similar addmions to mine itwill be extremelysatisfying. T h s type of l g h l s hke no other: not only is your state o f m d altered,you also leave with an article that you can wear out when you alter your state m other ways. To keep updated on next year's show visit www.theclothm~show.comfor informanon.

toplcs within the menu varylng from aboruon opuons to sexuallnfec~ons to what to do about blrth control. Also avallable are o d n e quzzes includmg such toprcs as: Signs Your Relauonslup 1s~nthe Danger Zone or The Breast Cancer QUIZ. Also avallable 1s a secuon called "Le Clubn-a forum where women share stones and are allowed to ask and have their quesuons answered by expert doctors. This month, the scuss~onisSexualHeal+and features Dunn as theDear Abb'j~intheir "Ask the Expert" feature. Most ofus know that onhne mformauon, for the majorlty of the time, can be unrehable, stemmingfrom sourceswith little or no credentials to back up their claims. The Women's Health Matters site, on the other hand, is maintained andupheld by health-careprofessionalswithreal adv~ceand years of experience. Theirwebslte is up-to-date, easy to surf, and mcludes factual writings. For the majority of you grls out there who have trouble talking to a counsellor, a sibhng or even friends about sex, or are hesitant about stepplng Into the local free chmc to p ~ c kup pamphlets, I hghlv suggest you pay thls website a vlslt. It's a convement and eas~lyaccessible alternative to your usual source for sex-related advice-unless youreally en~o~talkmgsexwlth Ma and Pa orer a game of Scrabble.


1.40P h i l l i ~Street, Unit I7, Waterloo

- 15 minute walk from UW & WLU


Paradise HELP WANTED: seeks friendly pool part-tfmeand full-time ~ p p l ~


Last Friday night in the life of me $#i,2@4.i$$tlt$f$ CJ:


B'c,!18 $?;?i'.; !A

,l r F ,,, ;:,$!;,,J!" ,*l..l l,,,,ji5, ',,,,,&' &$!,,$i? ,,ihh51.e , , , , ,,,,,,:d4 ,,:,,,,~~,&!lij, e,r,;,,,

Last Friday I became re-acquainted u~thsomeoneimetawhileback.We'll call her Herambina. This cutey invited me and three buddies to pre-drink at her pad before we headed out to alocal adult hangout. At ten, we go orer there expecung a couple other girls. The door opens and we see nine hot clucks sprawled on couches in the living room. Herambina says the one phrase all

males crave, "Hey boys, you better the second whitest sports bar in UW, catch up. We've been drinking for nest to Bomber of course -the Salt hours." I jizzed my pants thrice. Lake City of s$orts bars! or twominutes, theferns silence. The problem of being inundated I had dreamt of a night like this since with nine hotties is that you don't thedays ofyore. We staredat thegirls, linowwhom to start with. They were stared at each other, stared at the girls all beautiful and worthy of mackage. somemore, staredatthe~breasts, and Unless you're smooth on the dance floor (!= Heramb), thencommencedwithintroductions. ,. Philty's is a tough Thankfullythesechickswere suffi- place to score. The dance floor, situated in the cientllr wasted, so our speechless entrancewasn'tn~eird.Aftercasualban- basement, resembled aTurkish bath ter, a few girls recognized my name house with its smoldering temperafrom In2p1;;nt.You gotta love literacy. tures, steadywafts of steam and boatloads of uncircumcised men. If you Onegirl says,"Heramb, you'renot walk across the dance floor, prepare going to write about us, are you?" "Of course not ladies!" I gushed yourself for alot of male ass rubbing. uith sinceritywhilst mentally undress- There are women, but a male ass rub ing her. Well, there was not much to is NOT worth a woman's ass rub. I undress. need a couple female testicle grabs to Laterwe went to Philthy's. Philthys, even it out.

LVe crashed a party in the neighbourhood. I walk in and notice ten Iranians sitting in a living room. My group pulls a disappearing act, ditching me at this Iranian jubilee. "Didn't even say goodbye!" I say. The Iranians could sense my hostility. Theywere fine chaps to let me stay for a whde. My frustrationwas overshadowed by the sheer strangeness of the night. It had gddily begun with a bevy of Man,thesenvoguyswerewalking beauties engaged in pre-drinking; clichks. They were members of some changedvenues to a sweatshop sports lame band where the irreverent bar filled with tonnes of cock, and drunken behaviour is to be expected. ended at an Iranian shindig? WTF? And the Indian goes home all One dude thought he was Carl Fucking Louis and high-jumped a 6- alone. inch rock. His buddy one-upped h m and ended up humpinga street lamp. The grls loved it. Tragic. People danced. People drank. I did alittleofbothuntilretreatingupstairs. I then did the second geehest thing at a bar on a Friday night - I read a newspaperlayingaround.Thegeekiest you ask? Playing Bogglc at REV. Sadly, two cuties out of the nine picked up a couple of loserguys. The four of them along - with Herambina left Philty's. I felt my presence was needed to ensure the symmetry so I hopped into their festive five-some.

UW grad goes green Tim Alamenciak IMPRINT STAFF

Luigi D7Agnillo is a University of Waterloo PhD graduate leading the Kitchener faction of the blossoming Green Party in its fight for political recognition. D'AgnilIo's degree is in chemical engineering, which he believes will assistin better understanding the environment and the ways in which we may repair it. I n 1994, D'Agnillo came to Kitchener-Waterloo from Calgary, where he had completed his BA in science.He enrolled at UW to achieve his Masters degreein applied science. Recently he completed his PhD in chemical engineering. He recognizes our regon as richin natural resources, and felt a calling to defend them. During the nine-year course of his stay in ~(itchenerWateloo, he has become involved in environmental concerns, including protesting the proposed freeway throughwetlands and farmlands, and serving on the Region of Waterloo's CyclingAdvisory Committee. During the course of his involve-

ment on these two concerns,D'Agdo realized that activism was simplybegging themanin power for change,and opted to becomk the man in power. "It doesn't take the media long to stop listening. The menin power just wait until the issue dm down," said D'Agnillo. He believes that the best route to change is through politics. D'Agnillo feels that "any amount of education helps [in politics]." He believes that politics requires close examination of the parts in relation to the whole, and the steps resulting in outcomes. D ' A p l l o sees a correlation with chemicaleengineeringin respect to reactant and result equivalencies. He also sees acorrelationbetween somethmg the Green Party calls full cost accounting,whichimpliesthatwe are responsible for theworld that our

children will have to live in, and the cause and effectrelationshipofchernicalreacdons. During his fight to prevent the freeway from being b d t and endangering wetlands and farmlands, D7Agnillobecame very familiar with localpolitics and political figureheads which he refers to as "small andincestuous." This hasgreatly assisted in his rise to command the local Greenchapter. For the future, Luigi D ' A g d o hopes that the Greens wiU be voted into office, and hewill continue fighting politically for environmental concerns.

R The Green Party platform is based around preserving and


restoring the environment. Their sociopolitical platform focuses on equality among all people. R See or for more information.


Local farmers, in the interest of raising profits and increasing local sales, have banded together to create Foodlink, a program that encourages farmers to sell directly from their farms. Foodlink offers information to consumers regarding where they can find fresh, seasonalfood at prices lower than the grocery stores. Providing direct access to products cuts the cost and environmental hazard of shipping the food, in addition to preserving the natural vitamins of many of the foods. Consumers can visit and see the source of their food, much of which is organically grown. This program is a good opportunity for students, who often do not have the money for produce or meat, or healthy food in general. Peter Katona, co-ordinator of the program, advises that you call ahead, just to give the farmer a bit of warning, as not all the farms have a store or a roadside stall. One drawback to the program is the lackof publictransitto most of the farms, but public transit is available to the weekly farmers' markets in St. Jacobs, Waterloo and Kitchener, where many local farmers sell their produce. More information is available at


Chicken, two ways traditionall!- sen-edin puffpastnr cups but, hey, we're students. If you prefer, you can sen-e~to w r cooked egg noodles instead of toast.

1cup cooked clickenin srnaksh pieces 1/ 2 greenpcpper, diccd IMPRINTSTAFF 1 onion, diced 1 cup mushrooms, sliced 5 Tb. margarine, divided Roast chicken 3 Tb. flour This is your basic roast chicken. YOLI 2 cups tnilk (not skim) can hncyitupnith garlic, fresh herbs, salt and pepper or stuffing, but it's pretty good just I thick slices bread the wn- it is. Heat nvo tablespoons of marga1chcken rine in a frying pan. Cook the onions for two minutes. Add the green pepsalt per and mushroon~sand cook until pepper the vegetables are soft. paprika Meanwhle, heat the remaining Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F. margarine in a pot. Add the flour and Remove the bag containing the chick- cook, stirring constantly, for 2 minen's organs from the cavity. You can utes or until the bubbling subsides. use them if you like, or discard them. Add the milk and bring to a simmer, Season the chicken generously on all stirring frequently. sides with salt, pepper and paprika. Add the chicken andvegetables to Put it in a roasting pan and roast, the milkmixture. Seasonwith salt and uncovered, for one hour. T o crisp pepper. Allow the mixture to simmer both sides of the chicken, turn it over onlow for lominutes. Ifit's too thick, once midway through the cooking thin it with some milk. Toast andliberallybutterthe bread. time. Dirlde the d k m k t u r e ox-erthe bread. Sencs 2. Chicken a la King a s reclpe makes use ofleftoxr chcken from the roast chlcken reclpe. It 1s Kourtney- Short .-

---_ i'AHT I

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Tuesdavs and Sundays a great escape Michelle Rorke IMPRINT STAFF E\.en the threat of Hurricane Isabelle didn't stop the L X ' performance of ' ~ / I P , v + , , ~ ~ t ,\dI U I ~ O ) , . ~ . , 1 ne shon-.\\.ritten by nvo ( h a d xis' Liedina f i n h n and DarliclAArnold. ii 2 tragic lo^.^ stot? ict ~


unexpected mist. The setting is crucial to the feel of the pla!-. Djrector . h l y I-louston, n-rites,"Tlie decision to stage 7iii..rdqr onrl . S I I Y I ~ / ~ ' Jin \'ictona Park, on the island, came 3 , :I response 1-oJ cicsire derp ins~ilcthis test - and. indeed, inside most !oung --


end up dancing all

I\lary the follo\ring

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William (Nathan Bender) and Mary (Natalie Mathieson).

date, he el-en so, he falls short of rendering it con\-incingl!. In spite of his understntcd charm, Bi'g~sstanimcrs and stuttcrs through his diaFinall!, the alien is gone! The niali logue like an actor playing in front of cious critter that in\-;ded \Y oody a camera (and doing a bad \Y'oot!y rlllen's body, forcing him to make hllen in~pressionto hoot). movies t h a t n o r r o t o n the trash heap I do, ho\s-ever,admire the choice of of film hston- (read: .Smul/'l7me Cmnks, Curse / l ~ r] m / p .1.mtpioi~,Ho17/2li1~uod Christina Kicci as Amanda, the deEk(lji44, is no more! manding, unsrnble and manipulativc female lead and the object of Falli's Aizyt/~iigblse is a nostalgic rcturn deepest desires, \Yoody has al\\-a!.s to the filmmalier's glor!- da! s, cmhad agift formemorable fcsnalc charbodying that familiar mosaic of acters, and h c c i nails 11nanda'sn-a!-\Vbodyisms: dysfunctional relation\yard appeal and blazing sexuality, ships,plGlosopl~ical~nusi~~gs and the culture ofjcwish. LikevintageA\l1en, t~iakingthe role her oa-n. ITioody himself is cast in a supthis is another love story that uses \\-it porting role as Palk's friend and menand wisdom to examine the ncurotic tor, Dobel, who asserts himselfas the romance and its mechanisms. eccentric philosopher king. The film Hay-ing said that, if \X.oody was onceamaster ofcinen~aticlovepoctq-, shifts back and forth bcnveen Falk's tenderness and insight, AtyfhiiiigEire fricndslupnrith Dohel and h s increas is a rehashed parody of his former ingly turbulent relationship with Amanda. Add to this mix Stocliard work. JasonBiggs playsJerq-Falli, a fledgChmningas Amanda's unrulj-tnotlxr lingcomedy~vsitertningtomakeiton and Danny DcVito, Falk's relentless manager, and what you have is an the N e n - Yorli circuit. He represents unlikely, yet harmonious cast. the ansious,Jewish male figure -the But actingaside, the characters, or typical Xllen persona and, in fact, a young\Yood!- Allen, thinly cbsguised. to put it more accurately, the caricatures, are just that. Both Falk and This may be Biggs' best role to Lauren S. Breslin . - -IMPRINT STAFF --

Ricci and Biggs in Anything Else



,Itnanda arc tired cliches from the cultureof~ea-Yor1;intefligentsiatl~ey~uoteobscurepoets,discussphilosophy a~ldprofesstheir addiction to BlUieHoliday.Imcan rcally,bo~inan!20-somethings can identify \s-5th that in 3003 (aside fiom,adl, me)?Xrovdy has always loved jntellectual tnasturbation, but in this contest, it's totally contriwd. Dcspitc these failings,you can'tgct more "\Y.oody" than this: striking photographs ofNe\vYork set against Cole Porter jazz stmdards and tneditations onlove, life and death. These, along with his ininitable \rit. are the ingredients for thegenre of\Y700dy, a genre he has graciouslyrehashed for a younger audience. Unfortunately the results arc mised.lit~~~t/~it~gI~Iir~heaskens hack to K'oodj-'sprime, hut fails to deliver the intellect~~all~~strcandnakedhumanity that, once q o n a time, really set his work apart. At!yt/~iil't;: Eic, isn't bad. It may neverwincl up on the proverbial trash heap, but it also wiii never makeit into the canon of Xllen classics.


Local punk outfit Dramaturg kills it at CKMS' post-AGM music showcase. Dramaturg was joined by prog-rockers Fervid Whisper at the show, which took place on Wednesday, September 24 in UW's Student Life Centre.

Sue Richards and cast show breast celebration Crystal Montgomery IMPRINTSTAFF

The Breast o j Re~~oi~ttiorz ail1 officially launch the third annual Breast of Canada (BoC) calendar. This one act play, which focuses on female health, d l b e shown nine times over a sevenday periodin early October. TheBrt.dstu~ez~olutionis a collecti~e work, which was created by Vicki Hambley and five other women who are all graduates of the University of Guelph. Hambley originally formed this group in order to present issues relatingto topics like the freedom and sexualization of the female breast in our society.The collectivewasdesigned not only to present and deal with issues that Hambley believes are major problems in our society, but to do so from a female perspective. COURTESY MELANIE GILLIS There~snoway to provide aprecise summa~ofthswork,asthecouecux~e "The Breast of Revolution" crew. The BoC calendar is available at the U W bookstore. is based on themes, not plots. HowSue Richards adds to this great calenever, this show will create a positive the information that is generally avail- tains massive amounts of informadar, "BoC is a different lilnd of calention concerning current women's environment that inspires thought, able concerningwomen's health matdar. And that adds tremendously to health and is a tool that serves as an ters is too narrowly focused on a few change and celebration. Additionally, its effectiveness as a daily educational owner's manual. It raises awareness thatwhen certainissues. She explained itwill also provide a forum that showtool for women and their fi~milies." about the importance of maintaining " ... started loolilng for info about she cases the bodies of average women. your health rather than reacting to an breast health, the majority ofinformaThis is in sharp contrast to theways in illness. It also contains traditional and which the female body is typically de- tion was aimed at womenwith breast ?%isexc~tiOnalpefot~narzc~ willtake unusual dates, as well as immense cancer or how to detect breast picted in the mainstream media. T h s 2, 3, 4, 7, atzd 8, place at 8pnz or2 October knowledge regarding breast health. cancer."&chards wanted to broaden collection of breasts and bodies that atzd at 3pnz on October4 and 5. It ~ ~ d l b e differ in terms of color, shape, texture the subject ofbreast health, especially Some date examples include: "Dead shown at the Youth Music Centre Theatre, BraDay" whch takes place onFebruand size also aims to convey the rnes- in the area of environmental factors which is located on 75 Cardigan Street in ary 13,2004. T h s event is celebrated sage that women should be comfort- that are suspected of causing the disGne@h. Tickets cost $ l 0 iiz advance and from coast to coast. Women are enease. able with their own bodies. $13 at the door. Thy can bepztrchased b_l, couraged to take their "dead bra" of Richards was introduced to this The producer of the collective is calhng the River h n Centre Box Ofice at which has no use anymore, meaning Sue Richards, who also organized the production when she was invited to (51 9) 763-3000, at The Bookshefon 33 no elastic or support and to get rid of BoC calendar. She developed it, in see the collective about a year ago. She Quebec Street, Guelph, or h_y email at it, by placing it somewhere like on a thought it was brilliant and invited the hopes to create a practical, affordable, in@@ breastoj2anada. corn. bush. Another very important date is cast to not only participate in the and educational tool that would proBreast of Canada day, which takes vide younger women with informa- upcoming BoC calendar, but to also place on July 13 2004, which is the be the launch of 2004 calendar. tion about breast health and breast second annual celebrationof this date. The elegant Canadian calendar concancer prevention. Richards feels that


The Laundromat 465 Phillip Street Parkdale Plaza II WATERLOO


(corner of Phillip &Albert)

coin operated laundrdhat with attendants STUDENTS: 20% discount on drycleaning only wash & fold service shoe repair alterations


W e offer a clean B fn'endlv atmosvhere. Come B visit us!

Small Brown Bike reminds you just how messed up the world can be.


Misery, happiness and Tool Lyrically, this is not a light record. "Scream in the Silence," for example, laments theinability to express, while "What's Missingis Dead" (with lines such as ' W e can't recover. We leave what's empty and move down the line") remind you just how pointless evervthingis. , ., Not exactlycheerystuff. Nonetheless, TbeRiverBediscomfortingin a way: sometimes it's good to know the world really is that f r i e messed up. It's not just you. Small Brown Bike The River Bed

Ian Blechschmidt, Imprint Staff

Erin Gilmer, Imprint Staff


Other reviewers have called Marshall, AUchigan'sSmall Brown Bike "posthardcore" - I don't know exactly what that means. I do know, however, that when I hear the opening bass riff for "Deconstruct/Rebuild," the first song off of their third full-length album The River Bed, it makes me want to jump around a whole lot. And that must be a good thing. Another excellent album put out by Smallman Records (Moneen, Choke), The River Bed rocks in the tradition ofThe Getup Ktds andThe Weakerthans. It trades aggression for introspection, but does so without being slow or ponderous. It's a great mix of heavy melodies played with soft distortion resulting in big, anthemic songs that are singablewithout being too poppy. The RiverBedhas avery unproduced sound, which gives it a great sense of honesty. The guitarists W k e Reed and Travis Dopp) are always a little fuzzy and avoid clearly defined riffs, making them murky and mysterious -like trying to see the bottom of a river full of stirred-up din. Jeff Gensterblum's drumming is key to SmallBrown Bike's sometimes frantic pace while Ben Reed does a great job ofgroundingthe recordwith his hard-driving bass lines. Mike Reed doubles as an understated leadvocalist- the way that The River Bedis mixed, vocals are almost lost in the mess. But that just adds to the effect.

friendly ends." This album does depict some kind of frenetic universe from another time. Don't let that scare you into thinking that you'll come out of listening to it in some kind of furied, frenzied state. O n the contrary, the blend ofmusical ideas on this record is done so beautifully that you could be in an empty room staring at a blank wall and still end up relaxed, content and moving your feet.

Simian We are your friends

A Perfect Circle Thirteenth Step



Simian really are your friends;the kind of friends that invite you over to a party at Beck's house, with Weezer serving appetizers. O r at least that's how I see it. I'll bet Spookey Ruben would also be invited. Simian's second CD willmake your whole body move in subtle ways. Right from the first track, "La Breeze," you'll begin tapping your feet. But by the time you reach "Never be Alone" you'llnotice your butt cheeks contractingrhythmically with the psychedelic beat. In fact, my happy cheeks are bouncing right now. Simian puts together a unique, entertaining and beautiful album. The four British boys makingup thegroup, describe Weareyotlrfiendras "a frenetic record stuffed with dozens of urban musicalinfluences,informedby travel between cities and all their favourite things and the urge to see all the power of those places harnessed for good,

Side projects are weird. They always sound different enough from the originalgroup to justify existing as a separate entity,but if David Usher releases a "SO~O" album and gets all his friends from Moist to play on it, is it any different than releasing another Moist album? APerfect Circle, the undertakingof Tool's Maynard James Keenan, is another example. Though it's a great album, Mer de Noms (their debut, released in 2000) seems alittle likeToolmade-easier to listen to. The band's second album, Thirteenth Step, takes this ball and runs with it -only in a different direction. I've got to stress, first of d , that I really liked Thirteenth St@. The new line-up, compromising Keenan, along with Billy Howeredel, Josh Feese, Jeordie White (Marilyn Manson) and See TOOL, page 19



The exciting original cast of Rent.

Rent makes its way to Centre in the Square Crystal Montgomery

one last meamngful song before he Qes. Mark Cohen is a fdmmaker as well as a fdm arust. He is also roommg Rent, a breathtalung and radlant with Roger. Americanmuslcal, celebrates agroup Tom Cobns 1s also HIVposluve of arusts as they struggle with the and IS a computer gemus who is back strenuous reah~esof today's world in New York after being away. Thls musical has won many major Benjamn Coffin I11IS the landlord of theatre awards, mcludlng the 1996 Markand Roger's bculdmg and stnves TonyAward forBestMuslcal and the to start a mulurnedta studlo. Joanne Puhtzer Pnze Rent is only the fifth Jefferson~s a pubhcmterestlawyerand muslcal to have received both of these Maureen's lover. Angel Shunard is a awards. transvesute street drummer also mThe muslcalrecavedits world prefected w ~ t hHIV. M I ~Marquez I 1s a mere off-Broadway on February 13, dancer with AIDS as well as a drug 1996 to rapturous remews. Followmg problem. these great reviews it became a soldFinally, MaureenJohnsonis aperout hit formance arust and Mark's ex-&Rentis the ston of love andloj alq friend Together, the cast ofthe musiamong stanmgarusts in New York's cal capture the heart and apmt of a East Vdlage. The &rector, Jonathon generauon. "Rent is sensauonal! W t h a huge Larson, uses AIDS to portray the heart and a couple of ideas about modern day world He uses AIDS because it is a dlsease that had struck young people finding connecuon in a disconnected ume, thls muslcal exdown several of h s closest friends But Larson refuses to let hls story be plodes w t h hfe," says the LosAngeles overcome by the hopelessness and Tzmes. It wdl be cormng to the Centre In despair that IS often associated w ~ t h the dlsease. He created the wonderful The Square m IGtchener on Septemmuslcal based on Puccim's IdBoheme ber 30 and October 1.The uckets went through the portrayal of elght mam on sale May 10 at 10 a.m. The uckets can be purchased at The Centre Box characters. Each characterIS umque, and faces Office, by phone at (519) 578 - 1570, thelr own problems. Roger Davls toli freeat 1-800-265-8977or o n h e at strugglesm b e c o m g amusicianwhde bemg HIVposlt~veHe hopes to wnte cmontgom@impr~nt.uwaterlooca IMPRINT STAFF


- but

The Government of Japan invites Canadian university graduates (by July 2004) to apply for positions as Assistant Languag; Teachers or Co-ordinatorsfor International Relations at schools and government offices throughout Japan. Renewable one-year contracts begin late July or early August 2004 with a salary of 3,600,000 yen (approximately C$44,000) after tax. Applicants should be enthusiastic about Japan, have an excellent command of the English language, and be mentally and physically prepared for the challenges of living and working in a foreign environment. For detailed information about the programme, or to download an application package in Adobe Acrobat (PDF) format, visit:


I 1





The Consulate General of Japan, JET Desk, Suite 3300, 77 King Street, Toronto M5K l A 1 tel (416) 363 5488 - fax (416) 363 6074 -E-mail access@, Meet a JET Pro~ramrnere~resentativeat thelnternational Omortunities Fair 0;tober 1 in the SLC

Little Caesws"

not qmte

continued from page 18

James Iha (The SmashmgP u m p h s ) , have created agood record. There are some fantasuc melodes with a nch texture and deep, chest-banglng sound. There are great heavy moments offset by even betterquetones. Keenan's volce, as always, puts a mce edge on each song, whde p i n g the whole dtska haunang, melodc feel. It just moves hke a Tool song. Whde MerdeNoms took the intensity of Tool and explored it using more convenuonal song arrangements, Thzr;tPenthSt@ takes the Bme to stretch out great moments, m the same way that songs hke (Tool's) "Sober" dtd. The first song, The Package, IS a perfect example. It starts slowly and spends a good four mnutes b d d -

climax of hard-rockguitars and crashing cymbals.The effect is brilliant. The only downside is that anyone who fell in love with A Perfect Circle, because of, say,J.dth, may have trouble w ~ t hThzrteenth Step. It canrequtre more carefulhstentng than Merde Noms, and unhke the prevlous album, you often don't know what you're getunglnto unulwell mto the track. As a result, you end up w ~ t someh thng that sounds a httle hke Tool made quleter and more thoughtful. Hopefully though, t h s won't turn anyone off. Despite theTool compansons andits departure from the accesslble style of hler de Noms, A Perfect Clrcle's Thzrteenth Step is defimtely worth your ume. Ian Blechschnxdt, Impnnt Staff


The Department ofEast Asiak Studies at Renison ColegL. o v f ~ o m .

1 I I I



Apply on-line! O M S A S Ontario Medical School Application Service October 8,2003 Last day for registering for on-line applications October 15, 2003 Applicatio

O L S A S Ontario Law School Application Service November 3, 2003 Application deadline-first-year May 3, 2004 Application deadline-upper years T E A S Teacher Education A ~ p l i c a t i o nService December 1,2003 ~ ~ ~ ition l i cdeadline o


O R P A S Ontario Rehabilitation Sciences Programs Application Service (Audiology,Occupational Therapy, Physical Therapylphysiotherapy, Speech-Language Pathology) January 15, 2004 Application deadline

Come and Celebrate

Each person wilt receive a complimentary souvenir mug and your group will be entered to win Mobon Extreme Student Survival Kits! n

Compete against other schools for most peopte in a group! Gall today and get your tickets! (519) 744-12% ext. 263 or on our website at www Must be of Isgat drinking age. 10 WI#be checked at ths door



UW all over new Children's Museum Neal Moogk-Soulis IMPRINTSTAFF

When the Waterloo Regional Children's Museum opens Saturday, September 27th, it will be a testament to a coming together of community forces. Through faculty, students and alumni, the University of Waterloo has been an integral player in the design of the museum and its exhibits. The museum took possession of the old Goudies department store budding in Kitchener three years ago. Having been abandoned for approximately 15 years the construction and renovations teams had their work cut out for them. A recent tour given by Michele Baumgarten, the museum's director of marketing, showcased the museum.The museum has 50,000 square feet of space and is spread across five floors and a basement. X large atrium running from the ground floor to the fourth left the museum with 60 per cent of the original floorspace. Museum space includes exhbit space; a street-levelgift shop; basement classrooms; a workshop to maintain old exhibits and create new ones; andgal1ei-yspace for the artist-in-residence. The tirst exhbit that visitors will see is the Geo-Terrace exhibit wh c h occupies a large portion ofthe ground floor of the museum. The exhibitwas designedwith the assistance ofPhilip Beasley and Thomas Seebohm from the School of Architecture and Stan Lipshitz from the math and physics departments.The Geo-Terracee-&bit invites children to create designs and patterns using fold-up shapes, magnetic rods and tactile tiles. Also on the ground floor is the TotSpot exhibit which will expose chddren from six months to three years to experiments with touch, sight and sound. The exhibit was designed with a ceiling that glows, colourful

interactive wall tiles and a 'water-bed' floor that will allow children to leave impressions on the surface. It was designedin consultation withDaniela O'Neill, director ofthe UW Centre for Child Studies.The centre is aresearch lab for early language and cognitive development with children from 18 months to six years old. Kathryn Saunders, a 1986 UW School of Architecture graduate and adjunct professor at theuniversityof Waterloo is the museum's exhibit designer. She began working on the museum two years ago just as the building went out to tender. Her visionwas to create a museum that went beyond the 'so-what' experience of other museums where patrons have limited interaction with the exhibits. The exhibits were created to inspire creative learning. For example, the Electrical Wall was designed to teach children fundamentalelectricityprinciples. Childrendesign circuits and then manoeuvre a current through the circuit and can observe its behaviour. Saunders, previously the creative director of the Royal Ontario Museum, was initiallygiven a budget of $1 million dollars to create the exhibits. After drawingup alist of local technology companies and their areas of expertise, Saunders approached them to pursue partnerships to develop exhibits. Envisioning "a creature to inhabit the atrium," Saunders approached ATS to create the Metamorph, a robot suspended on cables in the atrium space. Children can interactwith the robot from six different workstations, the interfaces having been designed with the help of ConestogaCollege.Usingpartnerships like this, the exhibits in the museum today are worth between four and five million dollars. Duringthe pastthree years ofpreparation, the museum has made use of co-op students from both the Univer-


The Waterloo Regional Children's Museum is designed with

The Waterloo Regional Children's Museum is located at the corner of King and Queen Streets in Kitchener. signed to teach children and families sity of Waterloo and Conestoga Colabout the region's water system. Malege. nipulating water in multiple ways, With two to three students hired children can watch the water travel 15 each term, they have been working in meters through the exhibit. both construction, research and deBaumgarten says that they expect sign to create the many exhibits.Once to have 100,000visitorsperyear,with the museum is open, students will forty per cent of those visitors being continue to be on staff and some may school children on class trips. The end up being interpreters. museum's educational programs are 'We've had excellent luck with the designed to be aligned with the Onstudents," said Deborah Westman, tario curriculum. "They've had agreat attitude and were Using the museum web site, devery eager to help." Westman, the signed by a UW graduate working at exhibitprojectmanager,is a 1989UW Quarsylntegrated Communications, School ofArchitecturegsaduate. Coteachers are able to find activitiesat the op students,volunteers and part-time staff w ill supplement the 10-12 full- museum that are compatible to their students' grade level. time staff working at the museum. In addition to working as consultThere are four children's museants for the museum, UW commuums in Canada. They tend to reflect their communitiesa c c o r ~ g t o ~ f i c h e l e nity members have helped in other wavs as well. Many UW alumni are Baumgarten. Located in downtown involved with the various technology IGtchener, the museum is almost at companies. Dr. Douglas Wright, the centre of the GoldenTechnology former UW president, is the chair of Triangle. the museum fundraising campaign, Drawing on the local expertiseand accompanied by Jim Balsae, UW resources, the museum has become alumnus and RIM co-CEO. Retired an art and technology-focused muplanningprofessorandwheelchairuser seum according to Saunders. In addiSaul Herzog was a consultant for action, the museum has drawn on the cessibility as well as a member of the community to inspire the exhibits.

~MWWMQS~WQ F B ~ . M @ - Q e& t + r~ e 'tr.c,< o + ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

10 King Street (at Queen), Kitchener

0 AccessibleviaGRTRoute 7 Parkingat Duke and Ontario Street Parking Garage

0 Grand Opening Saturday, September 27 11:30 AM Admission $3.50

0 Regular admission $7 Children under 2 free

0 for more infomation

The theme for the museum is "art and technology at play." With the help oftheUniversityofWater100,visitors to the museum will have plenty of opportunities to experience new and innovative technologiesin a fun learn- ,ing environment.



West Nile hype has gone too far Katherine St.James IMPRINT STAFF

The West Nile Vims. We've heard about the deaths. And the one in 200 chance of contractingitifyou are in an affected area. But the terrifying part is that less than one per cent of those who contract the virus have any serious side effects and 80 per cent never show symptoms. The basics of the West Nile Vims are these: it's a flaviviridaevirus -one that is transmitted by insects - and can only be transmitted by insects. That means that humans can only transmit it to eachother through blood transfusions. The virus is a seasonal epidemic that begins in summer and usually dies out in the fall. Logical, when you consider it occurs during mosquito season. The 2002 season saw the biggest spread of thevims: 44 U S . states and five Canalan provinces had 4,500 human cases,with 258 resulting in death. Remember that most times the virus goes unnoticed and never diagnosed. The symptoms are fever, head and body aches, skin rashes and swollen glands. The virus becomes serious whenitinfects the brain or membrane surrounding the brain. Those at risk

of serious illness are the elderly and those with compromised immune systems. If a mosquito bite swells to agreat extent or becomes infected,itis advised that you seek medical attention. Prevention of thevirus involves wearing light-coloured clothing and mosquito repellant with D E E T and stayinginside at dusk to prevent bites. Draining standing water in birdbaths and other small sources can stop breeding mosquitoes. But the human-borne madness that has snowballed over the frightening aspect of contracting the flu-like virus has, once again, gone too far. Did you know that during most flu seasons, aside frominfluenza outbreaks, up to 6,000 Canadians die each year? Yet the West Nile Vims has become an important public concern. The government has responded with force. Ontario alone has allocated over $100 million to the control of West Nile, from surveillanceactivities on birds, horses, mosquitoes and humans to public education, information brochures, testing on dead birds to track the virus' spread and applying larvicides and adultici4es t g e s ofpesticides geared at eliminating different age groups -on mosquito breeding grounds and habitat.

With all the resources allocated to the control and prevention of the virus, have any negative effects of this control been takeninto account? Applyinglanicides in many areas of standing water to kill larvae might cause more harm than good. Have the effects on our groundwater and drinking water systems been considered? Onlya fewofthe pesticides used against mosquito populations have actually been tested for effects on humans. They also kill pollinatinginsects such as bees and butterflies. The effectiveness of adulticides is considered neglible when other mosquitoes fly into the sprayed area soon after treatment. But the biggestconcern should be that using this pesticide will only succeed in forcing mosquito populations to become hardier carriersof thevirus. Letting the epidemic run its course would actually help us become more resistant. This may not be thegovernment's fault if they are only acting in the public's interest, but the illusion that the government has control over this virus and its effects is about as true as the idea that we can control nature.

The trtuh behnid taht scrmbaled e-mial Michelle Rorke




You've probably already seen the clip on the right in a forwarded e-mail that claims scientists at an "Elingsh" usversityhavefound thatpeople canread scrambled words if the frst and last letters are in place. A check on the net shows that no one has done h s son of study recently, so the e-mail itself is probably mostly invented. Backin 1976,Graham Rawlinson,a PhD student at Nottingham University, did a very similar experiment. He randomized letters in the middle of

words and found that some readers only detected four or five errors in a whole page of muddled text. The academic community was more interested in examining how people recognize the shape of words and their orderwithina sentence.So his researchwentlargelyunnoticed. In 1999, Rawlinson wrote a letter explaininghis under-appreciatedthesis work that was published in New Scientist magazine under the headline "Reibadailty." Tlus is letter was probably the inspiration for the email.

................... ..


Aoccrnidg to rseearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mettar waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wihotut porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae w e do not raed ervey lteter by istlef but the wrod as a wlohe.

e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e


. : .: ...



- make money by taking along a fellow student or a package. :

. ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A RIDE HOME? i : . DID YOU FORGET YOUR GUITAR OR WINTER CLOTHES AT HOME?: ride along with another student and save money!



- have someone transport it for less than you think. :


The Ride Board far \Pau and Your Stuff :-)

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and sign on for these and many more services, including an Ontario-wide discussion forum to debate topics: of interest concerning today's university students ... and for a limited time obtain free e-mail alerts.


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low-cost shipping e-community, helping students and the environment

e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e e



Liz Marton, Erin L. Gilmer IMPRINT STAFF

Monkey see, monkey want Biopsychologists at Emory University have performed a study concluding that monkeys share a very human-like trait with us -a sense of fairness and equity. Female capuchin monkeys refused a treat offered for goodworkif other monkeys received better treats. The researchers carried out experiments where the monkeys were rewarded if they handed back a token that the researcherhanded to them. As a reward, they elther received tasty grapes or dull cucumbers.Their findingis thatthe femalemonkeys rejected the cucumbersif another monkey who performed similarly received a grape instead.The males seemednot to care. This action in females proves that these primates have a sense of fairness similar to our own. Monkeys who received yummy grapes for work well done threw the treat away if another monkey, who wasn't as deserving also received the top treat. Previous studies involving humans have concluded that humans will reject pay if they believe they are being treated unfairly. Wet weekends not Mother Nature's fault

A team of climatologistshave concluded that constantly ugly weekend weather is not just our imagination. Fluctuations in the diurnal temperature range, the difference between the daytime maximum and nighttime minimum temperatures, do indeed occur in seven-day cycles. Piers Forster of the University of Reading and Susan Soloman of the Aeronomy Laboratoryof the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Adminis-


(519)893-9000 tration have compiled 40 years' worth oftemperature readings that show the seven-day cycle coinciding with the seven-day work week established by humans and not nature. The fluctuation in cloud cover and precipitationisexplainedby the weekly cycles of aerosol pollution by industry and transportation. Bacterium battery a possibility Bacteria, tiny marvels of nature, may one day work for us in rnicrobebased fuelcells. ScientistsDerekLovley andswades Chaudhuri of the University of Massachusetts have discovered a bacterium, Rhodoferaxfenireducens, whichis able to transfer electronsfrom sugars to iron with an efficiencyof up to 83 per cent. The bacteria could convert the energy of a sugar cube into powering a cellphone for four days. The process is however,is too slow to be practical. A species of Clostn'diumhavepreviously been found to act similarly,but they converted only 0.04 per cent of available electrons into energy.

The study was published in the September issue of Xatzrre Riotechnol-


Study in

?!, L~,+i,cj!7~: :?+ % r l Ar.?l;RNa


No more worms! More than 60 universities and companies have begun ~voriiingtogether on agloballnternet laboratory called PlanetLab. This laboratory, designed to simulate thousands ofcomputer users, will be used to test new methods of combating Internet worms.

Testingfor lnternetworms or distributed computer programs is normally done on existing machines of the same network or using simulation software. Computer researcher Laurent Mathy from Lancaster University points out that "simulations only give you an approximation of reality.If I only simulate an algorithm, I'm not going to have real background traffic." PlanetLab solves this problem by creatinganetwork on top of the existing Internet. This network consists of 170Internet-linked machines from around the world. In fact, any researcherwishing to access PlanetLab can do so by contributing a machine from their network.


representatives from

The University of Melbourne, Australia

will be hosting an information session about programs available at the University of Melbourne in:

Biological Sciences


Environmental Sciences


Physical Sciences





Physiotherapy Veterinary Science


Wednesday, October 1


3pm 5pm


Building Biology 1, room 271


Or visit the University of Melbourne Booth in the Student Life Centre from Il a m - 3pm

A jungle in Niagara Falls

Niagara Falls Aviary houses over 300 tropical birds.

A giant new jungle aviary has opened in Niagara Falls that houses 30 speciesoftropicalbirdsfrom around the world. The Niagara Falls Aviaq opened on June 21 in a converted museum. The decor was conceptualized and built by film set designers to look and feel like a real tropical rain forest. Visitors can walk through the 15,000 square foot open environment among plenty of tropical plants and trees, including two forty-foot palm trees that had to be lifted in through the roof. The museum environment also features a beautifulwaterfall. Some of the 300 birds on site are allowed to fly freely throughout the exhibit, while others are in observational exhibits. Visitors canlearn about bird habitat,why some became extinct and how they have adapted.

Low season rates for high season dates - the best deal for Christmas. Only $30 to change dates, compared with up to hundreds of dollars on other tickets. Get your Christmas flight now, and change when your exam schedule comes out if needed.

B n


For over 30 years, Travel CUTS has been getting students to school, back home, and to the world beyond. Visit ~ ~ ~ . t r a v e l c ~ t s . c o m .

~ 3 ' r See RtheAworldMyourEwav L ~ University Shops Plaza, 170 University Ave. West 886-0400 ?-1

integrates basic and clinical science.

Opportunities Fair

Earn a Doctor of Chiropractic degree in our 10 trimester program.

University of Waterloo

Apply your knowledge and techniques during a full year of clinical experience at our four sites.

October 1st

Customize your education to specialize in sports, geriatric, pediatric practices or prepare for a career in research or teaching.

Michael Lynch NYCC representatiue

Contact the Admissions Office at NYCC for more information at 1-800-234-6922 or visit 2360 Route 89 Seneca Falls New York 13148


, -


Friday, September 26,2003 The Guelph District Shrine Club is proud to present the 8th annual Great Canadian Brewing Festival, September 25-27 at the Guelph Sports and Entertainment Centre in downtown Guelph. Charity Casino - Friday, 7:OOp.m. to 12:OO a.m. and Community Day on Saturday, 3:OOp.m. to 12:OO a.m.; Sunday, September 28, 2003 The Lung Association presents "Hike for Life" at Laurel Creek Conservation Area, Waterloo. Registration 9:00 a.m. to 10:30 a.m. with hike beginning at 11:OO a.m. Call 886-8100 to register. Wednesday, October 1, 2003 5th Annual WSANet International Opportunities Fair is today from 11:OO a.m. to 3:00 p.m. in the Great Hall, Student Life Centre. Approximately 3035 educational agencies and organizations and NGOs are participating in this event representing institutions from the US, Canada, Europe, Australia, etc. For more info contact Maria Lango, International Programs Office, ext. 3999. Eating Disorders Awareness Coalition presents "The Craziness of Dieting, A Better Way to Health and Happiness" from 7:00 to 9:00 p.m., Hespeler Scout House, Forbes Park. For info call 7454875. Friday, October 3, 2003 Oktoberfest tickets on sale now! Have fun and support a local charity. Meals on Wheels of KW is selling Oktoberfest tickets for opening night for Bingeman'sMarshall Hall. Call 743-1471 for infol tickets. Thursday, October 1 6 Famine Relief Concert starring UW Drum Circle, DouglasWarson, Ophelia's Mask, Sweetline, Matt Osborne, Mo Kauffey, Red Zepplin and many more from 8 p.m. to 12 a.m., Student Life Centre, Great Hall. Check out the website at uwfaminel or Nancv at for more information. Sunday, October 19 Spass 'N Spiel Needs You ! Help run this city of Waterloo, family-fun Oktoberfest event. Contact Chris Barker at 8 8 5 - 1 2 2 0 ext. 2 4 1 o r email

Power May for Easter Seal kids - volunteers needed. Spend a few hours on Saturday, October 4 helping with Power Play for Easter Seal Kids. A fun outdoor, 4 on 4, street hockey tournament being held in the Philthy McNasty's parking area at Westmount Plaza, Waterloo from 8:00 a.m. to 7:00 p.m. For more info contact Lisa at 568-8556 or Smiling Over Sickness, SOS. is a student-run organization whose goal is to make sick children smile. This objective is achieved through voluntary services provided within the local community. These services include trick or treating in local hospitals, wheelchair basketball, coffee houses, etc. If you are interested please email or come ro the first meeting Friday, Seprember 26 in the Physics Building, room 150 at 2:00 p.m. Cradlelink, a Lutherwood-CODA program, trains volunteers and matches them with a family in K-W or surrounding areas to provide in-home support to families with infants for three to four hours a week. Contact Julia at 7431460, ext. 292. Volunteer with The Friends program for a few hours weekly during thk school day and make a life long difference to a child. Volunteers are matched by the Canadian Mental Health Association


with children who need additional support at school. FRIENDS operates in partnership with local school boards and helps children 4 to 15 years. Call 744-7645, ext. 317 or Resume builder! Volunteers needed to visit people with Alzheimer Disease through Alzheimer Society Volunteer Companion Program. One to four hours per week. Next training session: October 4 or November 11, 18. Call rill at 742-1422 or email Volunteer Action Centre, 742-8610. is seeking volunteers for the following positions ... VOLUNTEER AT KPL..#1067.. read a book to a child, visit a home bound reader, assist students wich homework, etc. Day or evening hours available. HABITAT FOR HUMANITY..#101314173..seeking committee members for their Board of Directors. One meeting per month with some committee work . VOLUNTEER COMPANIONS ..#1128-1543..for the Alzheimer Society. Spend time with individuals with dementia. A commitment of a year is required. Full Training is provided. ALL ABOUT FOOD..#1135-14142.. Individuals to assist with nutrition education. Volunteers should be flexible, reliable, and sensitive to the needs of those with acquired brain injuries. LIGHTS, CHILDREN, ACTION..#4039-14146 & 14147.. The Children's Drama Group is looking for someone to assist with the Board of Directors, as well as an administrative assisstant 8-12 hours per week.

If you are in need of emergency service such as renovation/restoration. industrial millwright call Mike at 654-0627. An invitation to singers: the University of Waterloo Choir invites singers (soprano, alto, tenor and bass) t o sing in Mendelssohni's Elijah. The choir rehearses Tuesday evenings at Conrad Grebe1 Chapel from 6:30-9:00 p.m. The concert date is Saturday, November 22 at 8:00 p.m. For further info contact the Music Department at Join the Fitness Forum, a free on-line discussion board dedicated to fitness, nutrition and training. Log on today at Coffee House performers needed for November 1 show in the Student Life Centre from 9:00 p.m. to 12 a.m. If interested contact Nancy O'Neil at 888-4048, ext 6283 or Backgammon - it is "not just a game." It is "the game!" Easy to learn to play and excruciating to play well? Learn it from the Guru. Contact Need food or short of cash? The FEDS Food Bank is a cofidential student-run food bank that provides free groceries to UW students. Visit us in the student Life Centre, room 2108 or you can e-mail us at: Competitive Co-ed Volleyball team in Kitchener is looking for 2 female players for Monday evenings. Contact Jeff at 7441486.


Monday September 29, 2003 S p a r t Searching Techniques 1:30p.m2:30p.m Learn how to develop your search strategies and techniques to find the references you need. Register in advance: www.

Friday, September 26, 2003 POSTING #3 expires 8:00 p.m. Meet at the Information desk, Dana PorMonday, September 29, 2003 ter Library. POSTING #4 available by 12 noon. Tuesday, September 30, 2003 . Workshop: Interview Skills: SellingYour Keeping Current-Digitally! 9:30a.mSkills. Don't stop at the fundamentals; 11:30a.m., Offered to graduate students, you must also prove your skills in the faculty, and staff. Engineering: covers eninterview. Here is your opportunity to gineering databases. This hands-on session uractice and imorove. NOTE: Please will show you how to save your search attend only if you can stay the full two strategies in various databases and have " hours. 3:30-5:30p.m. (TC Room2218). the results emailed to you on a regular Tuesday, September 30, 2003 basis. Registration opens on the first day of the month the course is being offered. POSTING #4 expires 8:00 p.m. WorkHeld in the FLEX lab, 3rd floor, Dana shops: Career Decision Making. Self Porter Library. See IST - Skills for the Assessment, Occupation~lResearch, InAcademic e-Workplace, for registration formation Interviews, & Career Deciform: sion Making. After this session you will Wednesday, October 1, 2003 be in a better position to assess yourself Find Journal Articles - Fast 10:OOa.mand your "fit" in the world of work, ll:20a.m. Arts and Social Sciences Stu10:30a.m. - 12:OOp.m. ( ~ ~ ~ o o m ' 1 2 0 8 ) . dents: In this hands-on session you will OwningYour OwnBusiness: Next Steps. learn how to search for articles online and Picking up where "The Basics" left off, how to make effective use of electronic this workshop will offer more in-depth journals and full-text articles. Register in discussion on start-up issues: strategy advance: and operational tactics, marketing, fiform/. Held in FLEX lab, 3rd floor, Dana nance, human resources, R&D. Porter Library. 4:30p.m-5:30p.m. (TC Room 2218). Wednesday, October 1, 2003 POSTING #5 available by 12 noon Study Abroad Fair 1la.m-3p.m., SLC Workshops: Interview Skills:The Basics: Learn the fundamentals of successful interviewing. 3:30p.m-4:30p.m (TC Room 2218). Interview Skills: Preparing For Questions: Discuss and learn from excerpts of actual interviews. 4:30p.m-5:30p.m (TC Room 2218). Thursday, October 2, 2003 POSTING #5 expires 8:00 pm. Workshops: Business Etiquette and Professionalism: Proper etiquette is crucial to a succesful lob search- and yoylr career. This workshop will cover dining etiquette as well as appropriate behaviour at interviews, employer receptionslsessions, and other networking activities. 2:30p.m-3:30p.m (TC Room 1208) Taking Care of Business - Session I: The basics of consulting: what it is, what consultants do, how to decide what to charge, where the costs are, how the consultants are used, how to get started 3:30p.m-7:30p.m (TC room 2218)

Thursday, October 2, 2003 Smart Searching Techniques 11:30a.m-12:20p.m. Learn how to develop your searchlstrategies and techniques to find the references you need. Register in advance:

Meet at the Information Desk, Dana Porter Library Monday, October 6, 2003 Smart Searching Techniques ll:30a.m-


FOUND Tutor needed to assist student with Social Statistics class ISS 250. Please email to apGraduate from Social Development Studies program needed to tutor SDS student.Please e-mail

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Life's Good

Rival Hawks run rampant over Warriors Charbel G. Balloutine SPECIAL TO IMPRINT

In what is generally regarded as the most emotional and intense game of the football season, the Warriors showed neither emotion nor intensity in the Battle of Waterloo versus the Laurier Golden Hawks. The Hawks avenged last season's loss to Waterloo, cruising to a 50-14 victory over the Warriors and improving their record to a perfect 4-0. O n a sunny Saturday afternoon at UniversityStadium,the Warriors came out flat and the anticipated battle soon became a blowout. Trailing 3-0 early in the contest, Waterloo almost recovered the ball at the Laurier eight-yard line after the Hawks' defensive back Ian Logan bobbled Waterloo kicker Matt Armstrong's punt. However, the Hawks were able to maintain control of the ball. O n thevery next play from scrimmage,LaurierrunningbackDerek Medler scampered 86 yards along the left sidelines to set up the first of many touchdowns for the Hawks. Laurier scored two more touchdowns on consecutire possessions before the end of the first quarter to increase their lead to 2 1-0. They continued their hot streakby opening the second quarterwith a long drive down the field that culminated in a touchdown run by Medler. Shortly thereafter, the Hawks put five more points on the board to build an insurmountablelead of 36-0 only 22 minutes into the game. Following this the Warriors turned the ball over to the Hawks when U \ i receixrJeffNosa1 allowed his defensive back to step in front of him and intercept Warriors' quarterback John Morbey's pass. But a Laurier fumble on the very next playwas recovered by UW free safety John Sullivan. Nosal then redeemed himself for his earlier miscuewith a41-yard catch and run as he sprung loose from his defender along the left sidelines. That play set up a 35 yard fieldgoal attempt for CX"s Matt Armstrong, which he sailed wide left. The Golden Hawks, however, conceded a single point to make the score 36-1, drawing a sarcastic cheer from the \X'aterloo faithful. Laurier scored another touchdown before the end of the first half to lead 43-1. The Warriors did close the half with a couple of receptions, including a spectacular one-handed catch by receiver Matt Reid, but went into the dressing room trailing by six converted touchdowns. With the game out of reach for UW, Laurier entered their substitutes into the game for the second half of play. WLU running backDerek Medler tallied 155yards on seven carries with a touchdown, and Hawks' quarterback Ryan Pyear completed eight of ten passes for 135 yards and two touchdowns, both in the first half alone.

UW defensive end Trevor Derreck runs through the gauntlet of his Warrior teammates before last Saturday's game against Laurier. The third quarter saw only singles and field goals added to the scores of both teams. Armstrong booted a career best 53-yard field goal just 2:37 into the half. He now trails only the record-holder, Western's Kevin Rydeard, who kicked a 55-yard field goal on September 11,1982 against York. Unfortunately, Armstrongwas helped off the field late in the game

after he suffered a shoulder injury while tackling a Hawks' punt returner. At the end of three quarters of play, Laurier led 47-8 over the Warriors and added another field goal minutes into the fourth quarter to take a 50-8 advantage. But true to the Warriors' pride, they did not give up. Filling in for UW's injured duo of Jay Akindolire and Greg McCurdy

was running backTravis Gellatly. He played marvellously raclung up 102 yards on eight rushes, including the final score of the game-a 68-yard run for a touchdown with 4:38 left toplay. The failed two-point convert capped the 50-14 drubbing by the Golden Hawks over UW. Laurier produced 575 yards oftotaloffence compared to Waterloo's 327 yards.

Midway through the season, the " Warriors boast the nation's leadmg tackler, John Sullivan who increased his total to 36 in this game. UW Receiver Ian Fordealso had 5 catches for 44 yards on the afternoon. The Warriors (1-3) will try to im- '-prove their record as they visit the Windsor Lancers (2-2) on Saturday, .September 27 at 2 p.m.

Warriors battle for tie Golden Hawks weather Waterloo storm in scoreless draw Adam McGuire IMPRINT STAFF


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The UK'women's soccer club continued their strong early-season plajlast weekend, fighting their way to a 0-0 draw with the Laurier Golden Hawks on Sunday, September 21. While the match ended without either team finding the goal, Warriors head coach Peter Mackie said he was proud of his team's effort against their cross-town rivals. "We played on a lot of emotion," said Mackie. "It was a huge tie for us." Playing at University Stadium put the Warriors at an immediate disadvantage because this was their first game on artificial turf. While an obvious adjustment had to be made by the Warriors because of the new playing surface, Maclue said his team settled down after some early jitters. "For the first 15 minutes, we were nervous," Mackie said of his club. "[But] in the second half, we were the better team." The Warriors were noticeably apprehensive as the game began, and Laurier was able to get a few good chances early on. However, the collective defensive efforts of the Warriorsyere able to ward off the Hawks asqhe Warriors slowly took control of the match. UW strikers Eline Kamphuis and Tory Westbrook were buzzing the Laurier goal throughout the entire first half, but the Hawks also produced a solid defensive effort by keeping the game scoreless through 45 minutes. However, it was in the second half that the Warriors began to take control of the match. Waterloo began winning possession of countless loose balls and prolonged pressure was applied to the Laurier defense. When the Hawks did get oppor-

Warrior Nicole Grinstead battles with a member of the Golden Hawks in the second half of last Sunday's game at University Stadium. The game ended in a scoreless tie. tunities to move the ballupfield, the stellar play of Waterloo's back four was able to quell any Golden Hawk rushes. "They're doing really well," said Mackie of his quartet of defcAers. "We try to build out from the back. They're quicker than last year." Waterloo continued to turn the screws on the Laurier defense, but to the Hawks' credit, they never relented. As the game wound down, the Warriors stormed the Laurier zone and nearly tucked in the game's only marker, only to be thwarted by Hawks' keeper Alison Goodman. With the Hawks clingmg to the scoreless tie, the final whistle blew and UWwas forced to settle for the draw. Even though Mackie praised his team's defensive efforts throughout the season (the Warriors have shut out their opposition in two of

three games this year), Mackie does see room for improvement on the offensive side of the ball. "We need more service from the flanks," hlackie said. "We're not as confident around the goal [as we could be]. Wewillget there; again it's just [a matter of] confidence." The U'arriors will next see action this weekend as they travel to the provincial capital for a pair of games. Waterloo will take on the University ofToronto on Saturday, September 27 andYork on Sunday, September 28. According to Mackie, these two match-ups are integral to the Warriors' overall success in 2003. "If we can get points [in both games] this weekend, it will kind of solidify us as a top-three team in the division," said Mackie.

UW field hockev cruises in win over Guelph

T i m e was, you could dream of continuing your education at the Ontario university of your choice, and those dreams stood a fair chance of coming true.

Brian Santos But that was before the Ontario government cut over $1 billion from our universities. Less funding means higher tuition, fewer professors, overcrowded classrooms, inadequate resources and, potentially, a lower quality of education. The Ontario government's spending per person on universities remains the lowest in all of Canada, and is lower than nearly every American state. The cost to attend university in Ontario is becoming so high that average families may find a university education is not an affordable option for their children. This is your university. It's important that you vote for the candidate who will bring about the necessary changes to assist our universities. We need a change from past government policy that has not adequately funded our universities. Help to ensure that dreams become realities for Ontario's students. Go to www.lwanttogotouniversity.comfor more information.

We care about the future o f our universities. This has been paid for by the Ontario Confederation of University Faculty Associations, representing professors and academic librarians in Ontario's universities

and Lindsay Hogsden allscored in the UWvictory. The Warriors' record now stands at 2-1-3. The Warriors are next in action on Saturday, September 27 when they travel to Kingston to play Queen's. Game time is 12:30.


Warrior women find winning ways after weekend split

This past Saturdaythe Warriors hosted theYorkLions at University Stadium and tied 1-1. Brooke Hoskingwas the only Warrior goal scorer. O n Sunday they traveled to face their archrivals, Toronto. Despite a strong defensive effort the Warriors conceded onegoal, which proved to be the game winner. The Warriors found theirway back to the the win column on Wednesday, September %with a 3-0 homevictory over the Guelph Gryphons. Goalie Katie McNeil registered the shutout, and Megan Wilson, Victoria Lounder

Women's rugby squad crushes Trent in season opener

The Warriors opened the season away from home, at Brock. The Warriors easily beat the Badgers 39-0. Kristy Heemskerk racked up five tries and converted two, and for her efforts received player of the game honours. The Warriors playedagreat teamgame, and were able to win the ball cleanly throughout the match. The Warriors conunued their road trip in London on Wednesday, September 24, but fell victim to a strong Western club in a 29-0 defeat. The Mustangs' strong defense prevented the Warriors from gaining any mo-

mentum, levekng Waterloo's record at 1-1. The Warriors return home for their next game, as they will host Toronto on Saturday, September 27 at 1 p.m. Warrior Men fight back from early deficit to even record.

The Warriors recordimproved to 1-1 when they came back to beat Trent aftergettingoff to a slow start. Trent was able to score in the first two minutes, and were up 20-7 at half time as a result of some poor UW defense. Warrior captain Dan Roscoe rallied his team, and scores by Ross Brittle and JaredEhgoetz reduced theTrent lead. Mike Saxton converted the try to put the Warriors in front. For the remainder of the gameTrent was held in their own half and were not able to threaten. Next game is October 4 when the Warriors host Carleton. with files from UW athletics

Major junior hockey is majorly underrated

There are certain things in sport that will never change. Mike Tyson will always be incoherent, NBA players will always get arrested and Canada \dlalways have major junior hockey. And while most fans of the frozen ballet are still countingdown theweeks until the beginning of the N H L season, last weekend's opening of the major junior season made me more

giddy than Pete Rosein Atlantic City. It was last Friday, September 19 when me and 6,066 of my closest friends took in the home opener of the Ontario Hockey League's IGtchener Rangers, last year's Memorial Cup champions (indicativeof nationwide junior hockey supremacy).I sawit aU that night-achampionship banner-raising ceremony, a plethora of goals (the Rangers won 10-4) and more action than Wilt Chamberlain's hotel room. This, my fellow puck heads, was thewaj-hockeywas meant to be played. This was also the way that hockey was meant to be watched. Intimate arenas like the IGtchener Memorial Auditorium are all over the major junior ranks. and these small rinks

tend to make the ticket prices lower.A lotlower.A seat for a Rangers game in the back row is $13.50. A seat in row 'IS (about half-way between ice level and the back row) is $13.50.And a seat in the "watch-for-flying-teeth" row 'A' is, you guessed it, $13.50. Conversely, Toronto Maple Leafs tickets can be as expensive as $400.Even the cheapest ticket foraLeafs gameis still a stiff $25. And you better hope that your admission includes some form ofx-ray vision- the ticket describes your view of the ice as "obstructed." Another thing that makes the major junior game affordable for even the most penny-pinching hockey enthusiast is the player's salaries (or lack thereof). While the typicalNHLeroften encounters the problem of what

to do with his money, the standard major junior player faces the quandary of what to do with no money. Junior players receive equipment, cost of living and not much else, so big ticket prices aren't needed to cover astronomical salaries. Plus, there's somethngrefreshingabout a hockey player that still drives his Ford Tempo to lus games. And maybe it's because of the more-than-modest salaries that the on-ice product ofjunior hockey is so damn good. The pros have guaranteed salaries no matter how bad they play, so there's bound to be some offnights. A major junior player has no guarantees, except that if he performs poorly in front of the wrong NHL scout, his career aspirations will be

crushed. The only thing I haven't mentioned yet is the talent of the up-andcoming hockey legends. The pace of the major junior game can (and most likely will) blow you away and unlike many pro games,you will see plenty of scoring. After all, scouts are rarely impressed by howwell a youngster plays the neutral-zone trap. The future looks bright for major junior hockey, as the visceral, entertaining brand of Canada's national game shows no signs of relenting. Cities like IGtchener will always have major junior hockey, and teams like the Rangers w d always be a joy to watch. Not a bad deal for $13.50.

Warrior men split weekend doubleheaders With just four games remaining, Waterloo is tied for third in OUA Rod McLachlan IMPRINT STAFF

For the Waterloo men's baseball team, the story of the weekend was win big and lose big. Earning a split of the two doubleheaders on the weekend was satisfactory but not what UW head coach Brian Bishop had hoped for heading into the pivotal four-game weekend. Prior to the four games, coach Bishop expressed his desire to at least register a split in the two games last Saturday against the Western squad which he said is close in skill level to Waterloo. His wish came to be as his Warriors lost their first game 10-6 and rallied with authority to secure the second match with a convincing 15-0 score. Fifth-year veteran pitcher Tyler Wilson took the mound.for UW in last Saturday's firstgame,. However, all Wilson's experience still could not help him squash an explosive Western offence. A struggling Wilson was forced to watch nine Mustang players cross the plate in front.of him during- the course of just four innings. Finally the sluggish Warriors

came to life in the fifth, but six runs was all the offence the hometown Warriors could generate. Jeff Murdoch did his part by contributing a homerun along with two RBI's. Waterloo's Scott Schmidt was the other bright spot wlth three hits in game one including a homerun and two RBI's. With Waterloo's bats o n a roll already from the end of game one, UW's offence racked up an impressive 15 runs in game two, which started at 7:00 p.m. last Saturday night. First-year pitcher J o h n McNabb was superb in his second victory of 2003 as he completely silenced the Mustangs' bats in the first five innings with five strikeouts and two walks. The Warriors were led offensively in game two by catcher Graham Holloway who registered four hits and two RBI's. However, the Waterloo bench could not have been happier to see Jai-Paul Jatana crush a grand slam that broke the backs of the Mustangs. The Warriors revenged their earlier Saturday loss with a 15-0 win. The next day, last Sunday, prior to Waterloo's doubleheader versus the last placed York Lions coach

19 3ich

Bishop expected to capture both games, although he did suggest that he believed-that York was a much better team than their 1-7-0 (winloss-tie) record suggested. Bishop turned out to be painfully correct as his club split Sunday's games losing 5-4 in a squeaker but thrashed York in the second game 8-0. Third-year ace pitcher AdamBeck t m k the mound in game one for UW. His club scored three quick runs in support during course the game's opening inning. However, York slowly chipped away at the Warriors lead due to some shoddy defensive errors. They say that leads are like ex-girlfriends: you can never get them back. True to this adage the Warriors after failing to recover from this misplays suffered a heartbreaking 5-4 loss. Ingame two Waterloo once again jumped out to an early lead. Showing impressive poise rookie hurler Scott Vandyckprotected the Warriors' 1-0 lead during his five-inning performance, which earned him his first victory for the Warriors. During his time of the mound he surrendered only three hits while striking out six. In the sixth inning the of-

fensive floodgates burst for Waterloo as they tallied five additional runs. With the bases loaded Chris Dietrich's clutch hit drove in two runs and was an integral part to the Warriors' sixth inning barrage of runs. Reliever Alex Beauvais was brought in to secure the victory. With his steady pitches he completed the shutout that Vandyck had started. The Warriors' playoff aspirations will be tested tomorrow versus the GuelphGryphons inadoubleheader as Waterloo travels to Hastings Stadium for a 3:00 p.m. start. Monday will see the Warriors return home to the confines of Jack Couch Park in Kitchener to take on the first-place Brock Badgers. Game one of Monday's doubleheader kicks off at 5:00 p.m. - With files from UW Athletics JULIAN APONG


Sept. 27, UW vs Guelph at Hastings Stadium, Guelph, 1:00 p.m. Sept. 27, UW vs Guelph at Hastings Stadium, Guelph, 3:00 p.m. Sept. 29, UWvs Brock at Jack Couch Park, Kttchener, 5:00 p.m. Sept. 29, UW vs Brock at Jack Couch Park, Kitchener, 7:00 p.m.

Up~ownWaterloo is full of back-to-school savings! Participatingbusinesses in UpTown Waterloo wish to welcome the students back to school, especially the students of the University of Waterloo. We encourage you to explore the many shops and 'services that await you in UpTown and to help with your student budgets, these participating businesses are offering special student discounts (student ident@xztwn must &shown):


Business Improvement Area: Tel: (519) 885-1921 Website: www.uptownwaterloobia.c

Bead Bazaar 47 King St. N . - 888-1771 10% oflregularpriced items (to Oct. 31/03) Carry On Comics & Books 32 King St. N . - 886-4267 10%offeverything (excluding wall books) until Oct. 31/03 Delirium Clothing 23 King St. N . - 886-8480 10%offregularpriced items (to Oct. 5/03) 22 King St. S - 746-4958 10% oflor $5.00 offa custom t-shirt

Luci's Mudhouse 22 Regina St. N . - 747-2155 Student studio fee $6.00/brplus ceramics. Martin Chiropractic Clinic 57 Albert St. - 886-2570 50% off initial visit until Oct. 31,2003 Mavis Theatrical Supplies Inc. 46 Princess St. E. - 746-1484 20% off(exc1uding rentals) to Oct. 31/03 0.w. sports 32 King St. S. - 886-2840 10%offregularpriced items to Oct. 31/03 Plantation Coffee 4 King St. N. - 746-3350 20% offeverything (excluding alcohol)

The Other 5 Toes 22 Bridgeport Rd. E. - 883-8637 10% off until Nouember30, 2003 The Waterloo Stage Theatre 24 King St. N . - 888-0000 Halfprice student rush seats Uptown Eyeworks 104 King St. S. - 888-1784 15% off until October 31, 2003 Wycks & Wyshes 5-8 Regina St. N . - 884-4696 15%off until October 31,2003

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Magic Mogilny a show to behold

TOP CORNER HOCKEY 89- When you see the number "89", Alexander Mogdny instinctivelycomes to mind. The familiar, yet distinctive numberon thebackofhs jerseyis just one of the many things that make hlo$~yaninterestingstudy. Mogdny, nicknamed "hfagic" earlyin his career, is one-of-a-kind specimenwho can generate moments of offensive inspiration on the ice. Mogilny is best known as a clinical sniper even though he's also a terrific playmaker. Understandably,his reputation as a lethal goal-scorer was forever attached to him after scoring 83 goals in 84 games during the 19921993 regular and playoff season. Interestingly, Mogilny scores most of his goals, not with booming onetimers norwith fancydekes,butrather bywhippinghisbullseye-accuratewrist


Tel : 519-888% B M O % , Mice: CPH 3381A Email :

pioneers of the fancy "puck off the skate and through the legs" trick that is used to beat defencemen wide on the wing. The trick goes something like this: draw the puck on the forehand side behind the body, then rotate the tip of the stickblade vertically to point downwards with a turn of the wrist in order to tap the puckup to the far-side skate and then kick the puck backup to the forehandin front ofthe body. Xlogilny also has a trademarkmove that he uses to get his shot off when facing a defenceman head on. While cuttingin towards the centreof theice, Moglny would fake h s wrist shot, then draw the puck back to reload and then finally fire his wrist shot in his normal balanced body position. With this move, he gets a little space away from the defenceman while moving towards a better shootingangle. This simple-looking move is deceptively Qfficult to pull off, because it requires smooth shifting of bodyweight to the frontleg then to the backleg and back

again to the front leg. His marvelous skills were on full display while playing for the Toronto Maple Leafs against Farjestad of the Swedish Elite League in a pre-season exhibition game. Facing a common situation with one defenceman between himself and the goalie, Mo&y cut towards the centre from the right wing and triedhis favourite "fake and reload" signature wrist shot move. He performed the triple-weight transfer movement gracefully and the move resulted in an assist on Alexei Ponikarovsky's goal. Mogilny also showcased his famed goal-scoring talent by sneaking behind Farjestad's defence to take a breakaway pass and then calmlybeating the goalie with awrist shot off one leg, Markhlessier style. Moglny added a second goal when he jumped into the slot to take Robert Reichel's pass and again used his wrist shot to beat the goalie stick-side. With high-speed moves like these and a three-point night in a 3-0 win over Farjestad, number 89's magic show continues to stun hockey crowds around the world.

Warriors dominate Hawks Adam McGuire IMPRINT STAFF

Warrior Hockey (W) Saturday, Septmber 27 vs U of T Varsity Blues,

z :00 pm,

UW Columbia Field #I

Frtday, September 26 vs Wiif nd Launer Goiden Hawks (ex) 7 30 pir UM: Coilirnb~alcefield Arena

Sunday, September 28 vs Stoney Creek (EX), 1:30prn UW Columbia lcefield Arena

'The Warriors men's soccer club took a massive leap towards recapturing their 2001 O U X championship glory last weekend, as U W emerged dominant in a 4-0 road victory over division rival Laurier at University stadium last Sunday, September 21. The Warriors were highly focused for the match-up with the Golden Hawks, and the emotionally-charged UW squad was able to capture momentum immediately as they were in control of thegame from the opening whistle. "I was ecstatic afterwards," exclaimed head coach Peter Mackie. "This game was as good of a performance [by UW] that I've seenin three years." Waterloo held an early advantage in the ball controlgame and the Golden Hawks were forced backon their heels early and often. Throughout the first half, a Warriors goal lookedinevitable, even though they appeared to be snakebitten around the goal. Finally,in the closing moments of the first half, Warriors striker David MiUswon arace for aloose ballin front of the Laurier goal and slid home the game's first marker. However, the 1-0 lead camewith a cost for UM, as Mills went down with an ankleinjury on the scoringplay. Despite theloss ofhlills, the first goal gave the Warriors the advantage ofplayingfrom ahead. "The first goal was big," said hfackie. Mills' injury forced first-year forward Payman Charkhzarin into the match and the rookie delivered. As the second half began, the UW roohe took control of the game, scoringtwo goals in the second half. UW's Omar hl-Sheichly rounded out the scoring in the lop-sided Warriors victory.The

UW's Kamil Mroczek chases down a loose ball in last Sunday's game against Laurier. v~ctorypushestheWarnors record to 2-1-0, setung up a b ~ gpalr of road games thls weekend agamst Toronto and York. V(;hlle the men's club IS already confidentgomginto h s weekend's matches, Mache says that the team ~571llbe even more mouvated for the game aganst U ofT, the team that ehmmated Waterloo from last season's playoffs. "The motlvaung factor for us 1s that the] shouldn't have beaten us past )ear]," s a d Mache "They'll be our blggest test so far." Mache adds that h ~ team s 1s ready

for the challenge, as the w n over Laur~erhas fueled h ~ club's s deslre. "These crossover games are huge for us," sadMache ofthe weekend set agmst the two eastern &v~slonclubs. "But we're a very confident team gomg down to Toronto." UW's make-or-breakweekendwd begnon Saturda), September 27 with thelr game at Toronto. They wll wrap up the~rroad trip on the followmgdaj when they take on York.

A busv weekend of sDorts in Kitchener-Waterloo


(Above)Wate~loodefensive back Daniei Waymouth (#22) forces Laurier Golden Hawk receiver Andrew Baechler during last Saturday's action. (Topleft) Kitchener Rangers leftwinger Paul McFarland(#12) isshadowed by Plymouth left winger Sean Thompson (#16) and Whaler defenceman Erik Lundmark (#6) during last Friday's season opener in Kitchener. (Middle left) Laurier Golden Hawksfourth year linebacker Jason Thomson (#52) latches onto Warrior quarterback Mihran Hadjinian (#8) as the rest of the Golden Hawks' bench watches on. WLU won the game by the overwhelming score of 50-14. (Bottom Left) Whaler defenceman Craig Cescon (#36) and his teammate Brent Mahon (#39) crush two Kitchener Rangers last Friday night. (Bottom Right) Rookie Warriors running back Travis Gellatly (#35) takes off from his pursuers during last Saturday's Battle of Waterloo football versus WLU at University Stadium.

Blessings rain down and banners rise up for Rangers Benoit returns from Leafs' camp to score eight points in IQtchener's Memorial Cup banner-raising night Rod McLachlan IMPRINT STAFF





T w o events unfolded in the Kitchener Rangers' Ontario Hockey League season opening 10-4 victory versus the hated Plymouth Whalers. The first event was a banner-raising of the four Memorial Cup championship banners to the rafters. The second event involved a Kitchener defender raining eight points down on the game and thus living up to his last name, Benoit, which means "blessed". It seems that only for this year's defending champion Rangers could both the ups and the downs of OHLlife possibly translate into positive s. Before last Friday's game had even started, the banner-raising already had the capacity crowd of 6,067 whipped up into a frenzy. It appeared, however, that the fans still had their doubts as to whether this year's Rangers squad, which has suffered an exodus of its key starters to pro hockey, hadwhatit took to be in the upper echelon of Junior 'A' hockey. Nevertheless, they forgot about Andre Benoit, who was about to put on an electric performance. Just one day earlier he had beenworking out at the Toronto Maple Leafs training camp. Showingplentyofenergy, Benoit struck with his first tally of the night just 24 seconds into the action. This lightning goal made it known to all the Kitchener fans that not onlywere the Rangers back in business, but that he was back. During the remainder of the game, Benoit went on to score three more goals and added four assists fora totalof eight points. Offensively, this was the best game ever played by a Ranger defenceman, and tied the OHL record for most points in a game by a defender that was set 14 years ago. All night long it seemed as if Benoit was from another planet. Every time he touched the puck it seemed to dri-e into the net. The Rangers' fourth-yeardefenceman certainly showed off his vast array of weapons as he scored using onetimers, wrist shots and even while being knocked down on his way to the net. Add to this, I(itchener7sEvan McGrath's goal and two assists along with defencemanMatt Lashoff s four assists and you have a thrashing of a bitter rival. A total of 15 points were attributed to Benoit, McGrath and Lashoff by the end of the night. The rout over the Plymouth squad must have been just as thrilling from the bench for head coach and general manager Peter DeBoer, coach of the Whalers back in 20002001. Watchinghis successor pull his startinggoalie just 3:30into the game only to pull the backup out at the start of the second with the Rangers up 4-2 must have at least brought a smirk to DeBoer's face. The Rangers will be reinforced up frontwithMike Richards and Petr Kanko returning from pro camps. However, if anything is wrong with

(Above) Rangers left winger Anthony Pototschnik (#26), defenceman Matt Pepe (#20), and right winger Mike Chmielewski (#13) lineup for the faceoff to the left of Kitchener's goaltender Carlo DiRienzo in third period action last Friday night at the Kitchener Memorial Auditorium Complex. Kitchener went on to defeat the rival Plymouth Whalers 10-4 in the game, which was the Rangers' season opener. (Right) Rangers' defenceman Matt Lashoff (#6) keeps a close eye on a Whalers' attacker. Lashoff, a rookie defenceman for the Rangers, earned the second star with his four assists during the game. The crowd showed their appreciation during a banner-raising ceremony prior to the start of the game. The banners were raised to commemorate the last season's Memorial Cup victory by the Rangers. the Rangers this year, it is their defence. This year, the Rangers will not see the return of defenders Matt Manias, Thomas Harrison, Steve Eminger, George Halkidis and T.J. Eason, who all helped the Rangers achieve greatness last season. Only four defenceman are returning from last year's team including Benoit and

Marcus Smith.Benoitwillbe expected to shoulder a large portion of the leadership and ice time on the blue line. The Rangers suspect defence is responsible for allowing four goals in four of their sixpre-seasongames. The problemwas notrectified for the season opener either, as startinggoalie

Carlo DiRienzo surrendered another four goals. The problem however, does not appear to bewith DiRienzo. The young Ranger defence seems to have trouble knocking their opposition off of the puck in the slot area. This will need to be addressed quickly if the Rangers are going to go far in the playoffs again this year.

Kitchener faced off last night against Windsor, although the results of the game were not available at press time. Tonight they return home to take on the Soo Greyhounds, who they swept in the first round of last year's playoffs.


Your laundry will be eaten by a ram. Whde attempting to communi- cate with it, you butt heads and fall unconscious. Entering a time machine...