he was so nice (Poetry)

hands shaking

heartbeat slows to a crawl

no eye contact

I fear his face

he smiled

“It’s okay, it won’t change anything”

it changes everything

he lets me cry

and I know that one day

I will thank him

but right now

I am sitting on my bed

crying over a boy

wishing he wasn’t

so nice

because I just want a reason

to not love him

so I can stop crying