13 minute read
Wellbeing: Kindness as a lifestyle
In a world where you can be anything, be kind.
Carrie on… Being kind as a way of life
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Greenwich life coach Carrie Brooks shares her tips
Be Kind’ -that’s what we’re hearing all the time at the moment after the tragic death of Caroline Flack. Is this just a social media trend? Something that we are simply going to forget once the next piece of salacious gossip attracts our attention. I certainly hope not.
Kindness is an important core value and we all need kindness in our lives to thoroughly blossom as emotionally healthy and content human beings. The need to be treated with kindness and the need to express it towards ourselves and others is paramount to our well-being.
Interestingly, just before writing this article, I came across some ground breaking research from Stanford University which clearly demonstrates the physical and mental health benefits of showing compassion and kindness. To break this research down simply, due to our stressful and busy lifestyles our brain is chronically highjacked and frequently jumps into ‘threat mode’. However, by showing kindness and compassion we flip the switch returning our nervous system to ‘rest mode’ which has a huge positive effect on our physiology. One long term effect of being able to live more in ‘rest mode’ is that it has been proven to slow down the ageing process. How brilliant is that!
It is important to realise that we are continually affecting our emotional and mental well-being by actively choosing what we read and what we expose ourselves to. The press and media exist to write stories that encourage us to click to read on, to buy the newspaper or the magazine, and their aim is to entice us to devour every detail while remaining insatiably hungry for more. It is up to us to decide where we want to focus our attention. It is time for us to take responsibility for our choice of the stories that we are clicking on and to begin to choose more wisely. Isn’t it tragic that it took a celebrity to end her own life in order for us to raise the importance of being kind and compassionate? What can we learn about ourselves from this tragedy and how can we ensure that it will continue to have a powerful impact on how we behave in the future? We need to become aware that we are we feeding the press machine by showing our avid interest in people’s intimate personal struggles and salacious falls from grace. On the other hand Tyson Fury, who became world champion in the boxing ring last weekend, is an amazingly positive example of someone who battled with severe mental health issues and overcame them while sharing his story with incredible honesty and openness. His recovery is inspiring to anyone feeling personally challenged at the moment and is an example of an empowering media story, whereas the same cannot be said about the tawdry coverage of Caroline Flack’s personal life. Tyson’s story is a positive one and impacts our lives in a life-affirming way, while the stories of Caroline’s personal struggles relied on activating the darker side of ourselves, the side of our insecure self that feels momentarily better by witnessing someone else’s demise. Who do you want to be? This is all about taking personal responsibility for the person that we want to be and the effect we want to have on our immediate world. ‘Be Kind’ is not just a hashtag, it is a way of life, and one that will bring along with it amazing benefits to both our psychological and emotional well-being.
I feel that it is important to share something that I hold close to my heart, and that is to spread the word about the huge benefits of talking therapies. If you are finding yourself in a low spot or struggling to cope, I would encourage you to reach out for help. The reason that talking to a skilled professional is so valuable is that the very act of expressing your inner most thoughts out loud interrupts the incessant thought loops that are going round and round in your head. This very simple act of opening up and speaking your thoughts and feelings out loud has an incredible impact on how you perceive your situation and also initiates a deeper clarity and understanding. You are never alone and there are many experienced professionals who are able to be of great assistance to you, just take the first step and reach out. Promise me.
My final thoughts are, that when we are exposed to a personal tragedy, while experiencing the sadness and compassion for a life lost, we can also choose to use this as the trigger to change our lives for the better. To take on board the ‘Be Kind’ mantra and start to show kindness. Firstly to ourselves and then to demonstrate it in our behaviour towards other people, whether they are close friends, family, work colleagues or celebrities who are having their intimate lives and personal struggles aired in public.
Let’s make ‘Be Kind’ be the positive change we want to see in all of our lives. Let’s start now.
HELP US HELP YOU IN SOUTHWARK
Feel unwell - can your pharmacist help?
If you start to feel unwell, even if it is just a cough or cold, don't wait until it gets more serious – your pharmacist may well be able to help.
Your local pharmacist can give you friendly, expert advice. They can recommend over-the-counter medicines for lots of common conditions.
Many pharmacies are open evenings and weekends. Just walk in, you don't need an appointment. You can have a confidential consultation with the pharmacist in a private room.
If your condition needs the attention of a GP or another healthcare professional, the pharmacist will recognise this. They will advise you to see your GP or the most appropriate healthcare professional.
You can find a local pharmacy at www.nhs.uk
Are you registered with a GP?
A GP or general practitioner is a doctor who looks after the health of local people and deals with a wide range of health issues. It is important that every member of your household is registered with a GP practice.
Your local GP can help you with many health related issues, including: • General health advice • Contraception and maternity services • Vaccinations • Prescriptions and managing long term conditions • Concerns about your own, or your children’s health GPs are also able to refer you on to a specialist or community services if you need further tests or treatment.
You can register temporarily with a GP if you are a student or homeless, if you are an overseas visitor, here longer than 24 hours but less than 3 months, an asylum seeker or refugee or on a work visa.
You can find out more about how to register with a GP at www.nhs.uk
Do you know about evening and weekend GP appointments?
The Southwark Extended Primary Care Service offers extra GP and nurse appointments from 8am to 8pm seven days week.
Just contact your usual GP practice to book an appointment.
Appointments are available at GP practices in Peckham and Bermondsey.
Find out more at www.southwarkccg.nhs.uk/8to8
EVERY YEAR, the NHS holds a General Practice Patient Survey, with the goal that we all gain a better understanding of how individual practices are serving patients across the country. This year, over two million people will be contacted and asked to give their thoughts on their practice. The survey – the largest of its kind in Europe – will be used to ensure
that GPs and their practices are being held to a high standard in Southwark, as well as in the rest of the country. If you are one of the people randomly chosen to receive the survey, please do take the time to respond. Your feedback is important to us, and we are grateful for the time spent giving it. To find out more visit www.gp-patient.co.uk
Bermondsey declutterer Katherine Blackler gives her tips for spring clearing
It’s that time of year when traditionally we throw ourselves into a spring clean – or do we?
A study in 2017found that 50 percent of the UK population has ditched this annual ritual. Long gone are the days of washing soot from the walls and beating a year of dust out of the furniture. Improved cleanliness and hygiene mean many of us are abandoning the annual cleanse. Add to that a lack of time and apathy, and it’s no surprise this tradition is becoming obsolete.
That’s why APDO (the Association of Professional Declutterers & Organisers) has a modern alternative to spring cleaning. They want us to reduce stress, save time and increase our wellbeing by clearing (aka decluttering) the surplus stuff in our lives. And remember that unnecessary “stuff” can apply to objects, emotions, diary commitments and even relationships.
Spring Clearing Week takes place from 16-22 March and is designed to help you focus on creating a positive environment for the rest of the year. The campaign empowers you to let go of your clutter and create more physical and mental space to do the things you love.
This year’s focus is on curating a more conscious closet and encouraging us to think more about the impacts of ‘fast fashion’. There are inspiring challenges or activities
to help us work towards a more sustainable wardrobe including: 1. Trying Courtney Carver’s Project 333: Limiting yourself to 33 items of clothing and accessories for 3 months, then rotate to a new mix of items for the next season. 2. If that seems easy, why not try Behind the Label’s even more demanding Six Items Challenge: select six staple items of clothing from your wardrobe and pledge to wear only these every day for six weeks (unlimited shoes, accessories on this one). 3. Find or host a local clothes Swish – an event where everyone brings their surplus clothing and exchanges it to save items going to landfill or festering even longer in the closet Local Professional Declutterer and APDO President Katherine Blackler (SortMySpace) explains that because each person has a different threshold and understanding of clutter there’s no fixed rule. It’s not up to her to tell you how many china bowls or DVDs you should have and she won’t be the one to tell your partner they need to throw out their entire collection of books! What she does do however, is to challenge you to think carefully whether something is still serving you well.
Katherine encourages you to think about what you could declutter and clear-out after the dreary winter months, to revitalise your space with renewed energy.
Ask yourself the following questions when considering your belongings: • Have I used or worn this in the last 6 months? • Will I use or wear this in the next 6 months? • Would I buy this for myself or my family now? If the answer to these is ‘No’, consider selling, donating, recycling or, as last resort, ditching.
For items you do use, but only infrequently, ask yourself • Do I need to own this myself? Could I hire / borrow it on the odd occasion I do need it? • If I kept this item, can I lend it to others to justify the space it takes up between my / our personal usage? • If that job needs doing in future, would I be likely to hire a tradesperson who’d bring their own tools or equipment? • Will the technology have been superseded by the time I’m likely to use this? • Will I know exactly where to find this if I ever do need it? • Can I afford to re-buy it if I happened to need my very own version of this in future?
Council tax prize draw
All new and existing Direct Debit payers registered with a MySouthwark account linked to their council tax account by 31 May 2020 will have the chance to get their council tax* paid for a year.
Terms and conditions apply see www.southwark.gov.uk/ CouncilTaxDirectDebit
Be the lucky winner and have your council tax paid for a year
*Up to a maximum of the Band D council tax charge
Pruning and seasonal daffodils
Jackie Power is a horticulturalist and herbalist who lives in Southwark
February can be a cold month with sleet and biting easterly winds. However, this year there has been a mix of milder weather with gales and torrential rain and occasional cold bright days. There are welcome signs of growth in the garden – daffodils have suddenly appeared, Prunus (Cherry plum) is in flower and the birds are becoming more active as light levels slowly increase. Weather permitting, routine tasks can be carried out: prune fruit trees and other deciduous trees if needed. This can be done until mid-March. When carrying out any form of pruning it is vital to have the correct tools. Use secateurs for the thinner stems and a pruning saw for larger branches. Blunt tools can damage stems which then attract disease. It is worth reading about pruning techniques before attempting this work. Wear appropriate protective clothing (including gardening gloves, proper foot wear and goggles). If using ladders make sure there is someone to help. Fruit bushes are planted during the winter months; it is worth finding space to include one or two raspberry canes or current bushes. Blackcurrant, red and white currents and cranberry can be kept pruned to a compact habit. Fruit bushes and trees are available at Ken Muir www.kenmuir. co.uk or www.victoriananursery.co.uk
For tidy window box and container displays, you can add seasonal favourites (hybrid primroses and miniature narcissus (daffodils) which are available as pot plants in markets and nurseries. Or buy a flowering house-plant to brighten up February days. Orchids - the Cymbidiums are easy to grow. They need cool conditions, good light (but not direct sunlight in summer), water every two weeks or weekly if they are in a warmer environment (and during the summer months). The Cymbidiums produce showy flowers on long stems and bloom for weeks. February sees the beautiful Acacia dealbata or Mimosa tree in bloom. Acacia has feathery evergreen leaves and a profusion of yellow flowers; it is quick growing reaching its maximum height of about 10 metres within twenty to thirty years. If there is space for a new tree – choose this one. Garrya elliptica or Silk Tassel Bush is an evergreen shrub; it produces eye catching long silvery catkins during January and February, it is evergreen and tolerant of a range of conditions including semi shaded areas. Another talented tree - the Witch hazel - is also in bloom, depending on the variety they start to flower from December through to March; the spidery, mostly scented flowers are a joy.
Open Event
19 March
Thursday 5pm - 8pm Clapham Centre
Come and find out about the wide range of exciting opportunities available to you at Lambeth College. Our open event will allow you to gain careers advice, learn about our courses, talk to tutors and get a feel for our facilities, learning environment and family.
Register online to attend lambethcollege.ac.uk/OpenEvents
