27 minute read
What is rimming
from Uplifestyle Magazine
by Uplifemag
So, how can you prepare for it?
Sex is psychological as much as it is physical, so it will be to your advantage if you prepare your partner for it; about rimming the first thing that you should do is to:
Advertisement
Clean the area
After the viral video of Sk Khoza licking it, the South African Social media was buzzing. People had different views on whether to muff or not. Some people were saying, “No! You must not lick!!” and on the opposite side were some people who were saying, “Yes, you should lick it!!” I am not going today which side am I coming from but all I can say is that when it comes to sex, there are a lot of things you should do, that ordinarily you would prefer to distance yourself from. Everyone has that dark fetish locked on their brains. Warning: if you still consider muffing (licking the v-j-j), you might as well stop here. Don’t read any further. Today we are talking about rimming; rimming falls under the same family of licking but this time we are licking behind. Rimming, ass licking, analingus (for our Christian friends), or simply the rim job, involves licking, penetrating with the tongue, sucking, kissing, or otherwise orally stimulating your partners bum. Despite the misconceptions out there, rimming is not merely a fun sexual activity in its own right that can be enjoyed by people of all gender and sexual identities, if they so wish. Some people might consider it the main sex act of the day while others people might view it as a way to prepare for anal sex – it’s totally up to the individual and their partner, and what they both fancy. As with every sexuality activity between consensual partners, trust and communication are necessary for enjoying rimming. I know most people are still thinking of sex as a taboo subject and as result they don’t talk about it as much, even as partners. Yeah you and your partner are in agreement; once you and your partner have decided that rimming is something you’d like to try, it’s time to prepare. For both of your benefit, it’s a good idea to clean thoroughly before you begin. This can be a bath or a shower or, if you want to, you can use an anal douche before you play. It doesn’t matter how you do it, just do it.
If you want to be really clean, you can try an enema or anal douche (uchatho). It is pretty obvious why this is important for the person performing tongue paly (taste, smell, bacteria and sweat) but is also important for the receiver. It’s understandable that a lot of people have concerns about cleanliness in that area due to its ‘day job.’ So if you cleaned thoroughly will help you relax. The more relax you are, the more pleasure you’re likely to get from the experience.
Trim your pubic hair (if you want to)
For some reason, a lot of people who choose to trim their pubic hair seem to forget that it grows much further than the perineum. Most people have a hairy butthole. Now clearly body hair’s a choice, and if you like having short and curliest around your pink balloon knot, then that’s cool…I guess. But if your partner has real aversion to body hair and you want some bum-fun and are willing to compromise than you might consider to give you bum-bum some grooming next time you are in that area. Less hair is equal to better stimulation.
Be safe from STI’s
So, what is a rim job?
A rim job is when your partner licks, kisses, sucks, and stimulates their partner’s anus with their mouth and tongue. It doesn’t have to always involve penetration of the tongue, but it can, if you and your partner are into that into it.it can be a wonderful, pleasurable act on it own. But it can also be a way to prepare for anal sex and get comfortable and ready for penetration. We know there are a lot of things that happens into that part or through that part of your body. So it is advisable that you prepare yourself for it.
Even with a thorough clean, a lot of people still feel a little uneasy with direct tongue-to-buthole contact, and that is ok. Any genital contact can lead to transfer of bacteria and STI’s.
so we suggest that all the due diligence be observed.
Add flavoured lube
Just like food, we all know that food tastes better with a little seasoning. Apply the same mentality when it comes to salad tossing and drizzle your lover’s anus with your flavoured lube. It will have the double benefit of helping your lips and tongue slide over sensitive arrears, as well as delicious.
Start from the outside
Remember: sex is about the journey, not the destination. When it comes to rimming, I recommend roaming than going in there fast and quick. Explore your partner’s body as much as you can before you get into their ‘spot.’ Start with the furthest points and work your way in towards the bull’s eye. You could use a likable massage oil or lubricant and begin massaging, squeezing, licking, and kissing their bum cheeks and inner thighs. When you are ready to start getting closer to your aim, begin
gently parting their cheeks so you can see the anus. For now, resist the temptation of touching it. Tease the area as close as you can, with your fingers, lips and mouth, so they are pretty much begging for it when you are done. A great tip to stimulate anus without touching it, is by breathing warm air over before you make contact.
Pay attention at your partner’s body language.
For the first time it is recommended that you go slow, experimenting with a few moves while observing your partner’s body movements. Keep your eye and you ear on your partner’s body reacts from their breathing and vocal response. If your partner is a ‘yebo baba’ type and their quiet in the bedroom, you can check in with them fi they are enjoying it or not. Communication is the key.
Use your hands
For extra satisfying rimming pleasure, play with two or more erogenous zones at the same time, that will heighten the pleasure. While your lips are busy with the (rim) job. Reach for nipples, clitoris, penis or any other spot you know they like.
Find the rimming position that works for you
Which position you play in should be comfortable and offer easy access to all areas you want to play with. Popular positions include the receiver laying on their back or with legs akimbo, on their stomach with a pillow under their hips, all fours, face-sitting or on the edge of a sofa with the giver on their knees. You can experiment to see which one works for you. If you want advance options, bringing toys like spreader bars, sex swings positions enhancer can be great for this.
Try using sex toys
Anal sex toys are a great next step once you’re comfortable with rimming. Start off small with beginner’s anal toys and explore all the incredible sensations they provide.
Rimming tongue available at your nearest sex shop.
Experiment
Experiment with different shapes, movements, pressure and tongue shapes. Some people love a firm lick from a broad, flat tongue, while others need the delicate tickle of the tip of a tongue circling their opening. Everyone is different but you are not for everyone, once you know your partner its enough. If you and your partner have discussed trying some penetration, you can delve a little deeper. Try poking your tongue into
I am just a normal guy; I was born and bred in Mpangeni a rural place in the Northern of KwaZulu Natal in a place called KwaDlangezwa, eMatholonjeni region. I started my education in a school called Insiwa Primary School and further went on to complete my matriculation at Umntonokudla Secondary. After that I went to Durban to further my studies ar Regent College to study for a Diploma in Health Service Management. After I discovered that this was not my thing, I then went to eThekwini Coastal College to study for Electrical Engineering up to N3. I also notice that this was not my scene, I went into fashion.
Life in Mpangeni…
The funny thing about being at Mpangeni I never thought there was anything odd about my surrounding. My grandmother made sure that I get everything I want and was raised in a family that was full of love and care. I must say she was very strict though. But at that point in time because I didn’t know anything better, Mpangeni was a best place for me.
Any childhood memories
As I have mentioned above. I had a very fulfilling life and my step mother made sure that I get all the love there is in the world but the difficult part for me was to grow up without the love of my biological parents, both of them. But the part of my being was due to my step mother who played an important role in my life and made sure that she introduced me to Christ. I still have fond memories going out to youth camps and church activities. I must say I had a very fulfilling childhood.You keep on mentioning your step mother, is she proud of whom you have become?
Unfortunately she passed away last year and that left a whole in my life because she passed away in the midst of covid19 era and as a result I could not mourn or prepare a befitting send off for her.
So how did you get into fashion?
I always wanted to do fashion from the young age but there was a misconception in the Black communities especially. That a fashion designer is a seamstress, that is good to mend clothes. But when I saw David Tlale’s Legit campaign I was inspired and was even more determined to get into the space of fashion designing. But biggest break started when I was working at KYD (Kwazulu-Natal Young Designers store), I met the outstanding and seasoned designers in KwaZulu Natal, in
fact South Africa. I met people like Kwenzi, Uhuru and… they rejuvenated the love of the fashion industry to me, however Kwenzi took a step further. She took me and put me under her wing and taught me a lot about the fashion industry, at that point I didn’t know even how to handle a needle but she was patient with me and taught a lot of things.
What your typical day like?
After that I was fortunate that I was enrolled into a fashion mentorship programme, this is where I met Greg Wallice. He became my mentor and taught me everything I know about the fashion industry from the business of fashion to study the trends, create the masterpiece and interpret the theme.
On starting a business…
In 2018 after I saw that I love fashion, I then went to start my company called Libo Creation and I started to stand alone as a designer.
Interesting name, what is the inspiration behind the name.
As I have mentioned that my mom (step mother) made sure that she instils the religious ethics in us. The name ‘ulibo’ is a biblical Zulu word for first fruits. So I saw myself as the first (fruit) to break away from the norm where my peers were going for normal careers like teaching, engineering and medicine I chose fashion. Plus I see myself as the first in my region of Mathonjeni to choose such a career and I hope a lot of new designers are going to come from my region as a result. Talking about the next generation of designers, what are the three things you would say are more important to make it in the fashion industry? Go to the fashion industry or any industry for that matter if you have a passion. The only thing that will push you during the dark days is passion. Have a teachable spirit. Talent can take you so far, but if you are willing to listen and humble yourself you will go far and beyond. Learn to forgive yourself for the previous mistakes and move
on. To have a business is the most difficult thing. You need to brace yourself for more downhill than ups. When a client says they want a particular item on a said time you need to deliver without any excuses. But normally my day starts by going to shop for cloths we are going to use for the orders we have and that depends on the types of orders Kwenzi took a step further. She we have. If we don’t have a hectic schedule like durtook me and put me under her ing the Durban July days, we usually design clothes that we sell to the shops. wing and taught me a lot about
What is your favourite aspect of being an
the fashion industry, at that entrepreneur? point I didn’t know even how to I am designer first, then an entrepreneur. So, when I handle a needle but she was am seated at home after a hectic months and weeks patient with me and taught a lot of preparation for a collection; and I get to see the end product…and of course the bank notification. of things.
Ups and downs?
Downs- like all the businesses, lockdown was the worst time ever and I was 2 years into the business. Until today I don’t know how I survived the lockdown. But the most devastating time was when I created a dress for a friend, with a friendly price and she then went on the socials to discredit my business ethics. She did not complaint about the product but how I do business. I felt bad because a friend she should have approached me for us to settle the matters. But I was a lesson for me that, there is no such a thing as a friends and family treatment or price when it comes to business. Ups- I am five years into fashion industry and I am learning a lot and there are awards to prove that. In 2019 I joined the Durban Fashion Fair (DFF) under the theme ‘Royal funeral’ and I won the Rising start Award. In 2020, DFF I had Gender based Violence theme and I won Best Collection of the Week. I was also featured in the Real House Wives of Durban, and have worked with a lot of household names such as Neliswa Sibiya, Sniezy, Nonkanyiso ‘LaConco’ Chonco, to mention a few and when Fezile_fashion
a well known fashion commentator in South Africa mentioned my work on her instagram, that was the best moment of my career.
So who is your role model?
David Tlale because for me, he opened up the fashion industry. Kwenzi and Uhuru as much as they were household names back then they were willing to ignite my little light and love for fashion. They taught me a lot. Greg as I mentioned before that he taught me everything about fashion. In fact I am inspired by everyone who works hard to make sure that they make a mark in the fashion industry and are willing to open the industry for young designers.
What motivates you?
Well…I am motivated by life.
What are your values and ideals?
I was raised in a Christian environment so that plays a huge role of my being. But I respect hard working and going for your dreams.
Any future plans?
I am still a young designer, I have a lot of things that I would like to achieve and more seasoned designers that I want to meet. After I have established myself in Durban, I would like to infiltrate the Joburg market, perhaps go on a global stage.
Uplifetyle on the talk: The
love proposal (Ukweshwelwa)
Picture courtesy of keira Burton
The truth is there are a lot of things that were a way of life before but now are considered taboo and an abuse of some sort. For females to be proposed to is heaven on earth; I even saw someone on the social media complaining that men they don’t have patience like they used to before. “You just turn them down once and they never come to try again. And then for boys approaching a girl nowadays is daunting exercise that is not worth their time. We also need to admit that technology has changed the game altogether but for those who still believe on approaching people on the streets with an aim to start relationships. I got you. We need to admit that proposing love to someone takes more than we say; you need to work out the courage and counsel yourself of the possible rejection. Working up the courage to talk to new people can be a huge and terrifying challenge. It’s even harder when a person who wants to propose love to is a beauty girl. Luckily though, there are ways you can drastically increase your chances of making a great impression and reduce your fear of rejection. Here are few five simple steps to teach you how to approach girls and create a lasting impressions. Before you worry about what you are going to say or do to approach girls, you first need to understand when you should understand them. Oftentimes, timing can mean the difference between being ignored and winning a date.
Here are some examples of when you should and shouldn’t approach a girl:
Do approach a girl if she is sitting/ standing and looks relaxed.
Pcourtesy of Fauxels People who are in a positive mood and show open body language tend to be more willing to have conversations. Do approach if you’ve noticed her sending several glances and/ or smiles your way. If this happens, she likely is interested in you and wants to start conversations. Don’t approach a girl if she looks upset. Chances are if she is having a bad day, she is not going to respond positively to getting hit on by a stranger. Don’t approach a girl if she is deeply preoccupied with something. Interrupting her won’t make a good first impression.
Create an instant connection with your eyes.
By The Coach Space As soon as you approach a girl, the first thing you want to do is make eye contact. This is important for two reasons: It shows confidence.
It creates a sense of closeness. When you make eye contact with someone, it triggers the production of oxytocin, also known as “the cuddle hormone.” While the amount generated from an eye contact won’t create any strong feeling of closeness. It does establish a sense of trust with girl you’re talking to, making her more willing to have a conversation.
Prove you are worth talking to
Studies have found that people are incredibly judgemental and hesitant when they first meet people. Girls especially are raised to be wary of guys they don’t know. They immediately look for answers to questions such as the following before deciding whether they should talk to someone: What do they want from me? Is this someone I can trust?
Are they worth my time? Is this someone I can trust?
The faster you can help girls to answer these questions, the faster they’ll become comfortable with you and be willing to engage in a conversation starters with ease to understand your intentions: Ask them for an advise. Where’s a good place to eat around here?” is it worth to sign up in this gym?” etc This is a great way to determine if you share mutual interest. Be playful, but don’t be a jerk
Show your harmlessness.
Women’s brains are built to read men’s body language. From the moment you approach them, their subconscious is analysing the way you hold your body and every move, to decide how they feel about you. So the best key to use your body language is to show you are friendly. Bottom line: use these signals to help her feel at ease, open body language; open torso with nothing blocking you. Direct eye contact upon approach. Visible hands to see reassure them you are not going to hurt them.
Approach her from the side
Women, more so men, are typical on guard when surrounded by strangers. Approaching a woman from behind or the front can be intimidating because she fears being attacked. Instead, slowly approach girls from a side angle so they can see you coming and prepare for your presence, rather than be startled by it.
So you have met the guy who looks pleasing to the eye, the way he conducts himself and the way he talks to his friends is appealing to you and then he comes to you and say, “Can I have your number I would like to get to know you a little better…” This is a tricky stage because you are still asking yourself if you really like him or not? At this point your mind and your heart are playing tricks on you. Your mind is collecting the red flags and your heart is pushing you towards him.
This can be a tricky thing to navigate simply because it’s not always easy to tell how long to wait for attraction to honour the person you are getting to know. Here are a few things to keep in mind when you want to give someone a chance:
Don’t put unnecessary pressure on yourself.
The first thing I would say is to not put any unnecessary pressure on yourself to have everything figured out. You don’t have to know you’re going to marry him. You don’t even have to know if you have feelings for him. The reason you’re getting to know him is to figure things out. Communicate with him and be honest about where you are at, but don’t feel like you have to have all the answers yet.
Communicate
A lot of times we’re afraid to say yes to a date because we feel like we’re communicating, “Yes, I am absolutely interested in you,” when this isn’t necessarily the case. Instead of being afraid of sending the wrong signal, it’s a good idea to simply tell the other person where you’re at. You can say, “Hey, I’m not sure where my feelings are yet, but I would love to get to know you a little better,” or something along those lines. Be honest about where you’re at and then they will know to put their expectations. A l o t o f t i m e s we ’ r e af r ai d t o s ay y e s t o a dat e be c a us e we f e e l l i ke we ’ r e c o m m un i c at i n g, “ Y e s , I am abs o l ut e l y i nt e r e s t e d i n y o u, ”
Ask yourself good questions
If it’s your first date, don’t ask yourself, “Is this my husband?” That is a lot of pressure and something a lot of people don’t figure out until they’ve been dating for a long time. Ask yourself questions that are appropriate for level you’re at. For the first few dates, you can ask yourself, “am I attracted to this person?” “Can I be friends with him?” “Do we have similar values?” if you are a Christian, you can ask yourself questions like, “Do they love the Lord?” as you continue seeing each other you can start to ask deeper questions.
Stay aware of your feelings
Part of the reason to ask yourself good questions is to help you to stay aware of your feelings. If your feelings are not progressing after a few dates, then it probably time to let things go. Attraction and chemistry with someone else is something that cannot be forced. Sometimes a person can seem like a rally great option on paper,
“...ask yourself good but the feelings just aren’t questions is to help there and that’s okay. Trust that God has deyou to stay aware of signed you to develop your feelings.” strong feelings for the person you’re ultimately going to end up with.
So you have been around for quite some time on this earth but you are far from singing the song, “In my times.” You know the real meaning of the saying that says, “You are as old as you feel…” but you don’t put on the make up like clown. You want to put the make-up that is befitting your age. Then read these following secrets they will surely benefit you.
A new eyeliner technique Make your eyes pop
Your eyes are the window to your soul and the focal point of your face, so it’s important to keep them looking their best. For bigger and brighter eyes, try lining your waterline with nude shadow or liner. This is the visible section of your lower lid just before your lashes. By lining it, your eyes will pop and look more colour to the inner corners for a bit contrast.
Age is a number, so there is no reason for women to feel less beautiful because of it. Not everyone is lucky enough to age gracefully as Halle Berry. However, turning 50 merely is merely entering a new phase od beauty. Rather than trying to recapture your old look, embrace a new one. With a new techniques and styles, you can look better than before.
Prime those eyelids
As humans age, our skin becomes significantly thinner, especially around our eyes. The thinning can cause the skin to have uneven tones. The best way to get around this is to use an eye primer. Not only will this allow you to smooth out the colour, but it also gives your eyeshadow some vibrancy.
When a person is younger, their eyelids are technically perkier. Applying eyeliner is as simple as dragging the pencil across your eyelid. But as most things, this technique change over the years. Rather than a singe line, apply your eyeliner with small dots. Smudge it with a pencil sponge to apply it across the rest of your eyelid.
The secret is lip gloss
Sometimes crating a new, fresh look is a simple matter. All it takes is a little but of lip gloss. Not only does lip gloss help give your lips a hint of healthy shine, but it can also make them look fuller. Plus, many lip gloss brands include a moisturizing agents in their products. You can be sure that your lips will stay hydrated all day long. If you’re struggling to choose a
Start at the centre
We might start on our foreheads when we begin using the foundation, when we first begin using foundation, but as we age, it’s more important to start at the centre to ensure you never you never miss any signs of aging that you wish to cover. Begin with a creamy foundation around the nose, nasolabial folds, and cheeks. This area is prone to blemishes and is usually the most vascular. Blend outward from the centre toward the ears, hair and neck. A fluffy, flat brush is best for an even application.
Libo Creations
For the Royal in inside you.
Provincial building Room 411. contact 061 986 7080. www.libocreations.co.za. Libo creations on social media
Only the brave:
Body piercing
There is a new form of beauty that you can try, it is called Body piercing. Previously this type of lifestyle was a taboo and most people saw it as a clear sign of the Devil worshipers…but so are the tattoos in some circles societies. Body piercing, which is a form of body modification, is the practice of puncturing or cutting a part of the human body, creating an opening in which jewellery may be worn, or where an implant could be inserted. The word piercing can refer to the act or practice of body piercing, or to an opening in the body created by this act or practice. It can also, by metonymy, refer to the resulting decoration, or to the decorative jewellery used. Piercing implants alter body and/or skin profile and appearance (e.g. golden threads installed subdermal, platinum, titanium or medical grade steel subdermal implants). Although the history of body piercing is obscured by popular misinformation and by a lack of scholarly reference, ample evidence exists to document that it has been practiced in various forms by multiple sexes since ancient times throughout the world. Ear piercing and nose piercing have been particularly widespread and are well represented in historical records and among grave goods. The oldest mummified remains ever discovered had earrings, attesting to the existence of the practice more than 5,000 years ago. Nose piercing is documented as far back as 1500 BCE. Piercings of these types have been documented globally, while lip and tongue piercings were historically found in Africa cultures and so many more but is actually from the Middle East. Nipple and genital piercing have also been practiced by various cultures, with nipple piercing dating back at least to Ancient Rome while genital piercing is described in Ancient India c. 320 to 550 CE. The history of navel piercing is less clear. The practice of body piercing has waxed and waned in Western culture, but it has experienced an increase of popularity since World War II, with sites other than the ears gaining subcultural popularity in the 1970s and spreading to mainstream in the 1990s.
The reasons for piercing or not piercing are varied. Some people pierce for religious or spiritual reasons, while others pierce for self-expression, for aesthetic value, for sexual pleasure, to conform to their culture or to rebel against it. Some forms of piercing remain controversial, particularly when applied to youth. The display or placement of piercings have been restricted by schools, employers and religious groups. In spite of the controversy, some people have practiced extreme forms of body piercing, with Guinness bestowing World Records on individuals with hundreds and even thousands of permanent and temporary piercings. Contemporary body piercing practices emphasize the use of safe body piercing materials, frequently utilizing specialized tools developed for the purpose. Body piercing is an invasive procedure with some risks, including allergic reaction, infection, excessive scarring and unanticipated physical injuries, but such precautions as sanitary piercing procedures and careful aftercare are emphasized to minimize the likelihood of encountering serious problems. The healing time required for a body piercing may vary widely according to placement, from as little as a month for some genital piercings to as much as two full years for the navel. Some piercings may be more complicated, leading to rejection.
- John Mayer
