Settling it over a cup of tea

by Pieter Dolmans

Generally, I think that the opinions we come across can be divided into two categories: common opinions, which are held by almost everyone (think ‘murder is bad’ or ‘garlic bread is good’), and controversial opinions, which are also held by many people but are often contested too (think ‘eating animal products is unethical’ or the famous pineapple-on-pizza-conundrum). We can, however, think of a third category. This is a category we can’t include in the other two, as they’re not really opinions that we often come across: weird opinions. These are not popular enough to be common, and not discussed enough to be controversial. They’re pretty much unknown.

A few weeks ago, a friend asked me: “What’s the weirdest hill you’re willing to die on?” I couldn’t think of anything, so I asked her what her answer would be.

“Cannibalism and necrophilia are completely morally acceptable.” despite their differences, Amanda and Iris prove more similar than they thought, and become unexpected friends.

At first, I burst out laughing, then I brushed it off and went on with my day: a common reaction to the ‘weird opinion’. It’s too far removed from the general opinion to accept, but not held frequently enough to pose a real threat to our way of thinking.

A few weeks later I realised that I have plenty of weird opinions myself. One that kept coming back to me was that all marketing, except for plain-text information about a product, should be prohibited. I’ll save my argument for another column, but the more I thought about it, the more important this opinion became to me. When I analysed and unravelled it, it turned out to be an integral part of my political worldview. And yet I had never taken the time to share it with anyone, let alone advocate it. Why? My only explanation was that it was ‘weird’. Because it was so unusual, there had never been a context in which it could’ve been brought up. Besides, I knew from personal experience how people deal with others’ unusual views.

Let’s be honest, Christmas rom-coms aren’t known for their outstanding cinematic quality. But these movies aren’t the rule; they’re the exception. These recommendations aren’t clichéd ‘woman working for enterprise™ in big city, forced to visit picturesque, small hometown for Christmas, falls in love with childhood crush, end scene,’ productions. They are more than just romance, they’re about friendship, and the magic of Christmas, but in a less cheesy, typical way. They’re about stepping out of your comfort zone and discovering new things in life, which you were too scared to do before.

My present to you this Christmas is the inspiration these movies communicate, and hopefully they push out of your comfort zone to experience the magic and start off 2023 with a big smile!

I can only conclude that uncommon opinions are often only uncommon because they are difficult to maintain. It’s easy to laugh at them, and even easier to ignore them. And through that automatic mockery and dismissal, they are driven out of public discourse.

So, the next time you come up with a weird opinion, don’t wait until it comes up naturally in the conversation. Get your arguments together, announce it to the streets, and don’t stop until you’ve convinced someone, or someone’s convinced you. And the next time you hear someone share their weird opinion, I implore you: don’t laugh, don’t scoff, and certainly don’t ignore. Even if it’s about cannibalism. Ask them for their reasoning, work the idea out, and then decide whether you agree with them or not. You’re going to end up with a lot of weird opinions, but you’ll be certain that you formed them rationally.