2011.02.03

Your only class is taught by your boss about your job since 1918

The Ubyssey presents our annual N eed a new reason to go to koerner ’s? check out this guy on page 4

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U

supplement

Pages 5-8

the ubyssey

this is why

we can’t have

nice things “toonie tuesday” cancelled after just two weeks.

REad why on page 3

FEBRUARY 03, 2011 volume 92, number xxxvii room 24, student union building published mondays and thursdays feedback@ubyssey.ca

2 / u b y s s e y. c a / e v e n t s / 2 0 11 . 0 2 . 0 3 february 03, 2011 volume xcii, no xxxvii editorial coordinating editor

Justin McElroy : coordinating@ubyssey.ca

news editor

Arshy Mann : news@ubyssey.ca

events classified

Ginny Monaco : gmonaco@ubyssey.ca

I need a person to re-type easy text by computer. No speed necessary but some experience is useful. This is part-time, flexible hours, occasional work. However, more work can be made available, if one wishes. Good pay plus bonus for dedication. Call Michael 604-618-9187. Anytime.

Indiana Joel : ijoel@ubyssey.ca

ongoing events

Marie Vondracek : sports@ubyssey.ca

Ubyssey Production • Come help

assistant news editor

Kalyeena Makortoff : kmakortoff@ubyssey.ca

senior news writer

Micki Cowan : mcowan@ubyssey.ca

culture editors

Jonny Wakefield & Bryce Warnes : culture@ubyssey.ca

senior culture writer culture illustrator sports editor

features editor

production manager

us create this baby! Learn about layout and editing. Expect to be fed. • Every Sunday and Wednesday, 2pm.

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Geoff Lister : photos@ubyssey.ca Virginie Ménard : production@ubyssey.ca Kai Green : copy@ubyssey.ca

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contributors

on a progressive project, but need funding? Do you have an idea, but can’t get it off the ground?

Apply to the Resource Groups for funding! Come in, pitch your

idea to us and we will consider fully or partially funding your project. • Every Monday, 11am in SUB 245 (second floor, northeast corner). For more info email resourcegroups.ams@gmail.

Alpha Omicron Pi recruitment event • UBC’s newest sorority,

Alpha Omicron Pi, is looking for more members to join its colony class! There are opportunities to take on leadership roles, volunteer and gain service hours, create lasting bonds of sisterhood and friendship, socialize within the Greek system, network with women with similar interests all over the world and enrich your overall UBC experience. • Informal recruitment events on Feb. 5 and 27, email ubcaoiirecruitment@ gmail.com for more information.

thursday, feb. 3 old red new red • Ever wonder

what the greatest Engineering prank of all time was? Some might claim the Statue Stunt of 1963 to be it! Stephen Whitelaw (AGIE ’65) and Art Stevenson (CHEM ’66) will retell the infamous story of the prank that duped the entire campus. You’re all invited to join the current Engineering student body to make this the largest ORNR ever. • 6:30–9:30pm, Cecil Green Park House. gladiator • Bravely go where

many UBC students have gone each year before. This is your chance to take on your toughest competitors and compete in your favourite American Gladiator challenges—as a team!

Whether you are navigating your way through a colossal maze, racing through the inflatable obstacle course or duking it out on the joust, this event is filled with non-stop action. • 4pm–12am, SRC Gyms.

jules massenet: cendrillon (cinderella) • The UBC Opera En-

semble and the UBC Symphony Orchestra will be performing Jules Massenet’s Cendrillon, based on Charles Perrault’s 1698 version of the Cinderella tale. Performed in French with English subtitles. • 7:30–10:30pm, Chan Centre, $35 adults, $25 seniors, $20 students, call (604) 8226725 or go to ticketmaster.ca to reserve. Tickets also available at the door. ubc film society screening: amelie • The UBC Film Society will

be showing Amelie, the beloved French film by director JeanPierre Jeunet. Amelie is a shy waitress in a Montmartre café.

After returning a long-lost childhood treasure to a former occupant of her apartment and seeing the effect it has on him, she decides to set out on a mission to make others happy and in the meantime pursues a quirky guy who collects discarded photo booth pictures. • Runs until Feb. 6, 7pm, Norm Theatre, $5 regular, $2.50 members.

friday, feb. 4 cold war confidential • This symposium expands on John O’Brian’s focus on photography during the Cold War in Canada.

Symposium speakers will explore links between culture (art, photography, literature), the environment and nuclear propaganda and protest in the Cold War era. • 10am–3pm, Belkin Art Gallery, go to belkinartgallery.com for more information.

saturday, feb. 5 Tailgater Football Tournament • Can’t get enough foot-

ball between the college bowl season and the Super Bowl?

Well, before you park your butt on the couch for six hours to watch the big game, come out and make some of your own history on the gridiron. Tailgater Football is the perfect way to get jacked up for the biggest weekend in football! • 11am– 5pm, UBC Wright Field.

tuesday, feb. 8 lunar new year celebration •

Celebrate the Lunar New Year at UBC, which includes a food sale (Sri Lankan, Korean, Vietnamese and assorted desserts), all the tea you can drink, a live music performance and a silent auction of framed artwork (cash or cheque only). • 11:30am–2pm, CK Choi Building Lounge.

wednesday, feb. 9 Double Double Foil and Fumble • Double Double Foil and Fum-

ble is a joint production between UBC Theatre and Creative Writing faculties. It follows the story of five university-aged friends as they get together to weave some magic; only none of them know what they’re doing, half of them don’t believe in magic and some of them have ulterior motives. • Runs until Feb. 12, Dorothy Somerset Studios, tickets by donation, proceeds go to Pride UBC.

HMS pinafore • The Gilbert and Sullivan Society of UBC returns to the newly renovated UBC Old Auditorium with HMS Pinafore, a lively and anachronistic staging of one of the best known operettas in the English language. Join the high-kicking sailor crew and their gaggle of giggling schoolgirls. • Feb. 9–11, 8pm, Feb. 12, 2pm, $15, $10 for students, email info@gsubc.com for reservations.

Kait Bolongaro Jade McGregor Noah Burshtein Kira Jenica Chuahiock Grae Burns Gordon Katic R. Anthony Turner Ryan Clayton Steve Locke Raymond Goerke Dallas Bennett Andrew Hood Josh Curran Charles To

legal The Ubyssey is the official student newspaper of the University of British Columbia. It is published every Monday and Thursday by The Ubyssey Publications Society. We are an autonomous, democratically run student organization, and all students are encouraged to participate.

Editorials are chosen and written by the Ubyssey staff. They are the expressed opinion of the staff, and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Ubyssey Publications Society or the University of British Columbia. All editorial content appearing in The Ubyssey is the property of The Ubyssey Publications Society. Stories, opinions, photographs and artwork contained herein cannot be reproduced without the expressed, written permission of The Ubyssey Publications Society.

The Ubyssey is a founding member of Canadian University Press (CUP) and adheres to CUP’s guiding principles.

Letters to the editor must be under 300 words.

Please include your phone number, student number and signature (not for publication) as well as your year and faculty with all submissions. ID will be checked when submissions are dropped off at the editorial office of The Ubyssey; otherwise verification will be done by phone. “Perspectives” are opinion pieces over 300 words but under 750 words and are run according to space. “Freestyles” are opinion pieces written by Ubyssey staff members. Priority will be given to letters and perspectives over freestyles unless the latter is time sensitive. Opinion pieces will not be run until the identity of the writer has been verified. The Ubyssey reserves the right to edit submissions for length and clarity. All letters must be received by 12 noon the day before intended publication. Letters received after this point will be published in the following issue unless there is an urgent time restriction or other matter deemed relevant by the Ubyssey staff.

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Wow, that’s really not very much event room. Send us your events anyway, we’ll probably have more room in the next issue! events@ubyssey.ca

U theubyssey.ca

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News

editor ARSHY MANN » news@ubyssey.ca assistant editor KALYEENA MAKORTOFF » kmakortoff@ubyssey.ca SENIOR WRITER MICKI COWAN » mcowan@ubyssey.ca

Toonie Tuesday goes down the tubes micki cowan mcowan@ubyssey.ca After a two-week trial attempt at bringing it back, the AMS has sent Toonie Tuesdays packing once again. $2 pints of beer were being sold on Tuesdays at the Gallery Pub and Pit Pub during the trial, and endeavor that was pushed through despite management concerns. The AMS Executive decided to cancel the weekly promotion due to a low profit margins and issues raised by the RCMP. VP Finance Elin Tayyar said that they are going to be applying for new liquor licenses in the new SUB, as well as a brew pub.

“Because of that, we want to be on [the Liquor Control Board and RCMP’s] good side, and we didn’t want to have friction between us because it’d be much harder for us to deal with those issues,” he said.

“We thought it’d be safe to let this go, cancel this and then focus on the more important issues.”

Tayyar said that plan was part of his strategy to increase business in the SUB, and pushed it through over management’s concerns around rowdy behaviour.

However, at $2 per beer and with the extra staff required, the profits from liquor sales were not as high as hoped. There was also expectations that negotiations with Caribou Beer would also

josh curran Photo Illustration/The Ubyssey

reduce expenses, which had yet to come to fruition.

“We weren’t actually making a whole lot more money,” said AMS President Bijan Ahmadian.“ As a result of the larger number of people coming in we had to get a lot more staff to come in and work at our bars and we did not have the capacity to do that.”

Then there were incidents around the RCMP. After the first Toonie Tuesday held on January 11, Ahmadian said there had been some reports and inspections about unacceptable incidents. “That could put our good standing in jeopardy with the [liquor control and licensing branch] and so we didn’t want that to happen either,” he said.

Aside from general rowdiness,, Sgt Kevin Kenna of the UBC RCMP said that there were three incidences involving minors during the event, and that they are waiting for the licensing branch to “do what they have to do.”

“Any abuse of alcohol and any substance abuse is a concern to us and a whole variety of agencies out here on campus,” Kenna said. “I was concerned by the fact that cheap beer is always potential for things to go sideways.”

The Gallery and Pit Pub will go back to the original Tuesday deal of $2.50 a pint and $9.50 a pitcher, though pitchers will not be sold after 9pm. Ahmadian said they are also looking at more having more food deals, programming deals, and karaoke events instead of Toonie Tuesday.

Now that the weekly event has been cancelled, it is unclear how the licensing branch will react.

“Some people said we shouldn’t be so worried about the war on fun but that’s definitely an issue. It’s a reality and liquor control and RCMP are just a lot more strict these days, and they’re not going to get any more lenient looking forward,” said Tayyar. “We’re better off looking at other ways of having fun.” U —With files from Kalyeena Makortoff

Creative writing class responds to ‘Too Asian’ article kait bolangaro Contributor When Maclean’s magazine published “Too Asian?” in November 2010, there were protests across Canada. In response to the backlash, they issued a formal apology and changed the title of the article to “The Enrollment Controversy.”

This title is apparently more appropriate for t he article, which was supposed to discuss the growing Asian majority in American colleges and how, should the US decide to limit Asian students’ enrolment, these students would choose to come to Canadian universities— edging out local Canadian students in admissions.

UBC students had mixed reactions to this piece. Rebecca Gu, a Commerce student and blogger, was disappointed by the article’ stereotypes of people of Asian descent.

“I thought we had moved beyond being characterized as personality-less robots,” said Gu. “I wasn’t too impressed they brought it up again. I was tired of it.”

Others, such as Celestian Rince, a Creative Writing major, weren’t offended by the article.

“I thought it was quite interesting and informative,” said Rince.

“I hadn’t known that US schools have racist admissions. It was also good that someone finally discussed racial interaction at Canadian universities without glossing over the realities of the situation.”

One on-campus reaction to the article came in the form of a

Youtube remake of the 1980s hit “We Are the World.” The video, entitled “UBC’s Way Too Asian,” is the brainchild of Dr Ray Hsu’s Asian Canadian writing class, who were led

by Tetsuro Shigematsu, a creative writing MFA student.

“Dr Hsu was the only one to take initiative with the article,” said Shigematsu.

“The challenge was to do something as a group that would be a lot of effort and coordination. I suggested half-jokingly that we could record a cover of the ‘80s charity classic “We Are the World” and people seemed to think it was a good idea. We decided we wouldn’t wait. We would do it the next morning.”

While they didn’t have official permission to shoot on location in places such as the Chan Centre, Shigematsu explained that the group used guerrilla-style tactics to film the video, which now has over 6800 hits on Youtube.

Hsu said that the results of the challenge “went beyond the Macleans article.”

“The issue of shelf life is interesting. On one hand, the pieces are kind of like journalism [as the videos feature] contemporary events,” he said.

“By producing works of art, that is different, however. Art doesn’t necessarily engage with the news.

A work of art can transcend the moment in which it was created and has a longer shelf life. Most interesting, [with] works of art tied to present-day controversial issues, we have something that works on the border of journalism and what we think of as art work.”

MFA student Tetsuro Shigematsu. geoff lister Photo/The Ubyssey

The video sensation plays on traditional stereotypes of people of Asian descent and nonAsians who are fans of different facets of Asian culture. Characters pop on and off camera with tag lines like “addicted to MSG” and “loves dogs (deep fried).”

The video also features Asian, European and mixed-race children. Shigematsu says featuring the children in the video had a deeper meaning.

“We are [showing kids] who are different ‘degrees’ of Asian,” said Shigematsu.

“It’s quite effective when you see the kids, [because] it’s not just university students [who are] affected by racist media coverage … [it] affects the next generation.

Do we want our kids to grow up with a right wing magazine featuring this garbage?”

There were some class members who felt uncomfortable with the project. “I initially felt that it was a good idea, as the article was

definitely worthy of some sort of response,” says Rince. “However, that soon turned to dismay when I realized that the response would simply be a denial of the truths in the article. ‘No, that’s not true,’ is not a very reasoned or substantial response.”

Shigematsu expressed the difficult choice which student activists often have to make: academics or activism.

“I had that luxury, not having to decide between doing what’s right or homework. Ray Hsu took that away. It was so simple and ingenious. We shouldn’t be the only ones on campus to be able to do this. This is a defining issue on campus in Canada. What if other students had the privilege? We can change the discourse. Rogers have their money; we have Youtube, Facebook and Twitter. It’s not about who has the most money, but who is the wittiest and quickest. This issue won’t be defined by multimedia conglomerates.” U

Young immigrants more likely to graduate university Emma Godmere CUP Ottawa Bureau Chief OTTAWA (CUP) — New findings from Statistics Canada suggest young immigrants may be better integrating into Canadian society than normally thought.

When compared to their Canadian-born counterparts, immigrant kids are more likely to get their hands on a university degree later on in life. According to the January 25 study, which used census data from as far back as 1971 and as recent as 2006, immigrants who arrived in Canada at age 12 or younger were more likely to have graduated university by the age of 25 than their Canadian-born peers.

Miles Corak, a vice-dean of research at the University of Ottawa, explained that this childrenspecific study is important, as past research on new Canadians has normally yielded more negative conclusions.

“A lot of public policy discussion [concerns] how immigrants integrate into Canadian society, and we’ve documented how poorly they’ve done relative to their Canadian counterparts,” said Corak, who is also a professor of economics.

“What we’re seeing, though, here and in several other studies that focus on the children, is that when we want to think about integration and success, we should be thinking in a little bit more of a longer term,” he continued. “And what we’re seeing again and again is that the children of immigrants are making a very positive contribution in society.”

The degree gap proved to be particularly significant for young boys who arrived in Canada in the 1980s—32 per cent of these male childhood immigrants had a degree by the time they were 25 to 34, compared to 20 per cent of their Canadian-born counterparts. The study indicated the pattern was similar among women, whose university-educated population across both groups also increased more quickly over time, compared to their male peers.

Children who immigrate at a young age, Corak said, are able to take advantage of certain benefits.

“They get the best of both worlds: they’re getting the heritage and the support from their parents, and yet they are sufficiently adaptable—and our schooling system actually has a lot to do with this as well.”

Corak pointed out that while this study provides some positive news, it also provides an opportunity to take another look at how we deal with immigration policy in Canada—and where we can improve.

“One of the things we learn from studies like this is that immigration policy is also social policy, it’s also family policy, it’s also education policy,” he explained.

“There really is a need for broader co-ordination between the federal government and the provinces across this whole area—so if one department or one ministry is changing immigration rules, [it is] going to have an impact for other governments and other departments years down the road.”

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culture

editorS BRYCE WARNES & JONNY WAKEFIELD » culture@ubyssey.ca SENIOR WRITER GINNY MONACO » gmonaco@ubyssey.ca ILLUSTRATOR INDIANA JOEL » ijoel@ubyssey.ca

Most Valuable Poet at Koerner’s Open M-I-C

Music

Rapper Evan Elman talks Boston, blunts and bullfrogs Ginny Monaco gmonaco@ubyssey.ca Evan Elman’s friends call him Biggie Sma l ls, t hough he’s about a foot shorter than his namesake.

A fixture at Koerner’s Open Mic for almost three years, Elman has been representing UBC’s hip-hop community at the considerably mellowed Monday night event.

“Koerner’s was sick,” Elman said.

“Everyone was rowdy; everyone loved going there. Now it’s like a whole different crowd.

It’s first year kids… and all they want to hear is ‘Wonderwall’ and ‘Freebird.’ I just make ‘99 Problems’ sound a lot better than Wonderwall.”

Elman is usually the highlight of the night. Part of it is novelty, watching this little guy do verbal somersaults over these huge beats. It’s hard not to be drawn in. Elman’s freestyles are quick and clever and his performances are truly spectacular. Even when he’s covering a song, you can’t miss his gleeful expression. The audience wants to enjoy it as much as he does. “Nothing makes me happier than being on a stage,” Elman said.

A native of Boston, Elman discovered rap as a way to connect with the people around him.

Having been kicked out of a private high school for selling pot, Elman was enrolled in the public system, where he was suddenly a minority.

“It was urban. I remember

Evan Elman is continually stepping up his game. geoff lister photo/The Ubyssey

just trying to blend in there,” he said.

It was in Boston that Elman honed his skills as a rapper. “Every day after high school, I’d go smoke a blunt with friends and then we’d freestyle for hours,” he

says. ”That was our thing. Outside, so we wouldn’t get caught by our parents.”

His success wasn’t immediate. “I put out a little mixtape. I just got torn to pieces. It was so bad. I tried to charge people five

bucks or something and they’d come back to me like ‘Fuck this!

I don’t want to pay for this!’ Going in as a minnow, I feel like I jumped out as a bullfrog.”

Elman moved to Vancouver three years ago, but Boston still

weighs heavily on his mind. “I’m still staying true to my roots, but I’m not the same person I was when I was back there… I look out the window at little birds and snow-capped mountains. What am I complaining about?” U

UBC Opera’s Cendrillon a fresh take on a classic tale Jenica Chuahiock Contributor

Note the absence of anthropomorphic mice. charles to photo/The Ubyssey

Fairy tales like Cinderella are meant to be retold. This week the UBC Opera Ensemble, along with the UBC Symphony Orchestra, performs Cendrillon by Jules Massenet, a French opera retelling of Cinderella. Based on the story by Charles Perrault, this Cinderella story features the magical elements that everyone will love. But unlike the popular cartoon version, the opera has more to tell about the poor girl who becomes a princess overnight to meet her prince charming.

“Compared to the Disney version, [this opera] is a lot more dramatic,” said Sylvia Szadovski, who plays Cendrillon. “[Cendrillon] really has a wide ranging personality. She’s not just going for the prince. She has a lot more motivation.”

“There’s more depth to Cendrillon’s character as well,” said Julia Kot, who plays one of the stepsisters. “You see how gracious she is around her family,

yet also how passionate she is to have her own life.”

Cendrillon also features more relationships and develops more characters, like the prince. “In the [cartoon] version, you barely see Prince Charming,” said Szadovski. “But in this opera he actually exists as a character, and you get more of the relationship between Cendrillon and the prince.” The prince is a ‘pants role,’ which means female performers will be playing the part.

Cendrillon’s father emerges as a sympathetic figure. “In this [opera] version, Cendrillon’s father is still alive,” said Szadovski. “[He] is this character you feel really sorry for. He gets bossed around by the sisters and evil stepmother constantly and he doesn’t really stand up for himself or Cendrillon.”

The presence of the father in Cendrillon creates a much deeper sense of family relationship, especially between father and daughter. “It’s actually more heartbreaking because the father is there,” said Szadovski.

Theatre

“He doesn’t want to upset his wife, so he doesn’t stand up for Cendrillon, even though he sees how horrible they are to her.”

Asides from romance and drama, Cendrillon is also a lively comedy. The evil stepmother and stepsisters are mocked throughout the opera. “Some scenes are really funny,” said Kot. “The stepsisters and the stepmother are hilarious [and] totally ridiculous.”

“I can’t describe how fun it is,” said Kot. “There are just so many different elements that come up in it. We can have hilarious, mean characters and then we can have a fairy and a magic carriage.”

It has all the wonders of fairies, elves and ballet dancers, but at the heart of it all is the story of love. “You definitely go through a wide range of emotions in this opera. Literally, you will laugh and you will cry,” said Kot. “Everything is just so magical.” U Cendrillon shows at the Chan Centre February 3-5 at 7:30pm and February 6 at 2pm.

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Growth

editor TREVOR RECORD » features@ubyssey.ca GUEST EDITOR GRAE BURNS Illustrator INDIANA JOEL » ijoel@ubyssey.ca

It gets better?

Growth takes energy: making things better now R. Anthony Turner Contributor The past year has been somewhat dark for the LGBTQ community, with antigay bullying, youth suicides, gay-bashings, and a shift of political power toward those who oppose equality in the USA. Fortunately, a few rainbows also emerged. The campaign for equality took a major step forward with the repeal of “Don’t ask don’t tell and people from across the world joined together to oppose bullying. The most dominant theme of 2010 in the world of LGBTQB issues was probably the “It Gets Better” campaign, with celebrities, citizens and politicos sharing messages of hope for the future.

“It Gets Better” is an important message because youth need to have faith

Welcome to the Pride Supplement Grae Burns Guest Editor When I chose t he topic of “Growt h ” for this year’s PrideUBC supplement, I was excited to think about the stories of personal perseverance people could Geoff lister photo write, interested to read about people’s /the ubyssey responses to advances made by and for the community locally, nationally, and internationally, and curious to see the artistic interpretations of all of the above.

I created a Facebook event, sent out e-mails and did my best to bring attention to the possibility of contributing to the supplement...and then I waited. The deadline for submissions approached and passed. I received a total of four submissions. Fortunately, I had set the deadline for submissions in advance of when they would actually be needed, and was able to extend the deadline and eventually received enough material.

While I immensely appreciate the time and effort the people who did contribute put into their articles, interviews, poetry and more, I am left wondering...what about everyone else? Where are the stories, the poems, the political commentaries, the comics, the interviews and the general responses I was so looking forward to receiving and reading?

I am too much of an optimist to let myself think that they just don’t exist. Rather, I would like to think that our stories of growth as individuals and a community exist in our everyday actions, too busy to be committed to paper. And I continue to look forward to “reading” about them. U The Pride Supplement was assembled

by Pride UBC, the AMS Resource group for sexual and gender diversity.

that the future is bright. (Because it is!)

I commend and appreciate the support and encouragement people have shown by sharing that message. However, I do believe we should consider exactly what we mean when we say, “It gets better.”

Do we mean to say, “Chin up, kids. We know you are absolutely miserable right now because your classmates, ‘friends’ and maybe even family members bully you and make you feel inadequate as human beings, but just survive the next few years, and then you can escape this hell and live a better life?” I certainly hope not. Why should kids have to suffer through years of hatred only to exile themselves to a more accepting community? I hope what we mean to say is, “It gets better, and I am going to do my part to make that happen as quickly as possible.”

For “it” to “get better,” society at large must grow to see people as people, regardless of their sexualities. Powerful groups oppose equality, so this growth is going to be slow if everyday people—you and I—sit around waiting for it. Why do teenage boys eat like ravenous hogs? Because growth takes energy. If we want things to get better sooner rather than later, we are going to have to put forth the energy that growth requires. The more energy we give, the more we can offset the considerable energy opposition groups put forward and the more likely true equality will become a reality.

There are many ways in which we can do our part. We can become active in advocacy groups PrideUBC, join a letter writing campaign, participate in like rallies or even volunteer at a LGBTQ resource center. We can also do countless

things in the course of our everyday routines. For instance, we can challenge others when they say, “That’s gay,” or, “He’s such a homo.” We can avoid using that kind of language ourselves, stand up for kids we hear being taunted and be honest about who we are to those around us to the greatest extent we feel comfortable. And, perhaps most of all, we can avoid doing harm—people scrutinize what we post on Facebook or tweet or blog about, and to some people, one of us may be the face of the LGBTQ community.

“It gets better.” Yes, but not on its own.

Everyday people—gay people, bisexual people, transgendered people, lesbian people and straight people alike—have to make things get better. Change does not come easily, but it will come if we fuel it with our energy. U

PoeM

The Sex life of Adolescent Caterpillars Steve Locke Contributer I am with you and the Playboys lying Splayed across your virgin white sheets, Lingering within your gaze and still breath In anticipation of approaching footsteps and anger in violation Of daddy’s private possessions, not to mention the order of the house.

Sons, not daughters are supposed to find the porn and Daddies know what boys do with pictures of naked ladies, Which means it’s time to have the talk.

But you are an only child, And daddy isn’t ready for this kind of talk.

Your sex is a heathen orgy of pages.

You move a limb, rub against a glossy breast, see her lips graze your bare skin.

The electricity arcs across the stiffened hairs on your arm, Dives into your flesh and bolts for your pelvis.

I am with you when lighting strikes And you are floating face up in a body of water.

I am with you when Jesse Salter comes over for dinner, In the sweaty ball of warmth between her palm and yours When she squeezes your hand under the table And your mother asks you to pass the potatoes.

I am with you when Jesse asks to see the magazines, Because that’s what you promised, And that’s why she came, Curious to know which of the women you would choose

for yourself, if you could.

But you’ve already had them.

So you tell her that the one you want leaves you letters Written in pink highlighter.

She bums you cigarettes at lunch break and sprays you With her perfume to cover the smell of smoke, And you imagine that you’ve been up against her yielding body, And the friction of your persistent movements is enough To shed some of her skin onto yours.

Like a mother bird, you lunge for her mouth, Offering a feast for her to pluck off your tongue.

I am with you when she forces you off and wipes her lips, Confessing she didn’t mean it, Suddenly abashed before the leering nudes, And you, abashed before her, The both of you in front of your mortified father.

I am with you as your body buckles under his words trampling on your self-esteem Like a herd of startled wildebeest.

I am with you when Jesse Salter averts her eyes at your presence.

I am with you when you try a boy on for size to please daddy.

I am with you in the cocoon, the tiny Vessel that dangles off a desolate twig Somewhere in the wilderness of your being.

I am your wings, folded and twitching.

I am gravity in your belly.

I am your wandering mind.

I am with you in the counselor’s office, Buying a costume at the dress shop, in the mirror, under the paint and gloss, in the back of Mark Warner’s parent’s car, unclasping your bra, in the smoke, where you are listless and numb.

I am with you in the girls’ room Where Jesse Salter asked you to meet her, Where she offers you a magazine with an earmarked page.

You turn to it, to a note written in pink highlighter that says: I’d choose her because she looks like you.

I leave you to be kissed, tasting cherries, yielding to her lips like winter yields to spring, When the butterflies come out.

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Understanding asexuality An interview with Asexuality Visibility and Education Network founder David Jay Ryan Clayton Contributor Dav id Jay, founder of t he Asexua lity Visibility and Education Network, spoke with me about asexuality in an interview over Skype in 2010.

He ta lked about t he definition of asexuality as, generally, a person who does not experience sexual attraction.

He pointed to the difficulty of defining a sexual orientation and how murky and challenging it is to put criteria into a label. He explained that, like any label, asexualit y can apply to a person or not—it would be up to that person to decide if the label applied.

Drawing comparisons to homosexuality, he pointed out that while many people who identify as asexual do so for their whole life, some people will use t he l abel for a time

and then feel that it no longer ref lects t hei r best u nderst a ndi n g of t hemselves and change it.

One of many misconceptions about asexuality highlighted by Jay is that it is a choice. While some people choose to live their lives without having sex, someone who is asexual does not feel a drive to be sexual. An asexual person could have sex and identify as asexual, as suggested by researchers, just as a homosexual man could have sex wit h a woman and st i l l ident if y as gay. Jay stressed that a person’s identit y is not defined by t heir actions, but by their thoughts and beliefs. Jay also mentioned that there is no specific way to be asexual. Like any other group of people, there are many different people from different walks of life who, although they share a consistent experience of feeling left out of a society so focused on sex, could be any type or personality.

There are also multiple facets to an asexual orientation. A website called AVENWiki, open to any member to edit, helps keep track of various expressions used to help persons who feel the asexual label fits their identity. Among the many available labels are identifiers such as sex-positive, anti-sexual, hetero-romantic, bi-romantic, homo-romantic, aromantic and more.

These identities speak towards positive or negative feelings about sex and orientations towards intimate relationships. For example, if a person labelled t hemselves as ‘aromantic,’ that would identify to others that they are not interested in forming romantic relationships, whereas someone identifying as hetero-romantic would only be interested in forming romantic, but not sexual, relationships with

While some people choose to live their lives without having sex, someone who is asexual does not feel a drive to be sexual. someone of the opposite sex.

In order to facilitate a deeper understanding of an asexual relationship, Jay described the desire of an asexual person to have a powerful connection with another person without using sex to achieve it. He stated that a person may develop a deep relationship with

anot her person and achieve deeper intimacy through common interests they share together and the time they spend together.

Jay said this may also involve a deeper connection with a larger community and connection to many different people throughout his own community.

He also joked that, when in a relationship with a sexual person, it should be handled with “tact, grace and style.” In his view, sex could be a compromise to bring intimacy to the sexual partner, if the asexual person was willing, but could also be an “uncomfortable form of cuddling” to an asexual person.

Why do we discuss this? Jay advised bringing up asexuality in order to develop understanding and awareness in the worldwide community. People who may feel like they do not fit into the sexual world would then know of an alternative so they could decide if it does apply to them. He also said that talking about asexuality, especially to a larger group of sexual persons, could provide an opportunity to talk about why sex matters in the world and have a deeper understanding of sex in society. Jay feels that “asexuality can actually be a useful tactic for sex-positive sex education, because it gets people in a place where they’re comfortable talking about their own sexuality.” U

“Sexuality is not who you sleep with, it’s who you are” Raymond Goerke Contributor Oh, tomboys, you know not the effect you have on me. I usually refer to myself as mostly straight, not wanting to close any doors unnecessarily, and I have a thing for short-haired women in ballcaps who know what they like and don’t take shit from nobody. I used to say I could tell if a girl was queer just by whether or not I was attracted to her. This persuasion has lead me to several unavoidable rejections by lesbians, but also to wonderful relationships with bisexual and queer women.

The intention of this article is to express my immense respect for the queer people of the world who engage in long term relationships with people of the opposite sex. You see, I’m a very argumentative person; I like to be controversial.

If I were queer I would make sure everyone knew. I would enjoy the comfort of the label, of the organized and identifiable “differentness.” If it were the case that I was queer and in an opposite-sex relationship I would be worried that people would think I wasn’t genuine, or claim that the times I spent dating men were just experimental and I had gone back to being straight.

Yet the women I’ve been with have never been fazed by this. And despite the occasional encounter with prejudices from both without and within the queer community, they have never been ashamed to call themselves queer with me on their arm. To do so requires a level of maturity and selfconfidence that I only hope I would have in such a situation.

This is a point that I believe is important to internalize in any open and accepting society as we move forward. In the words of author and feminist Jennifer Baumgardner, “Sexuality is not who you sleep with, it’s who you are. It doesn’t change according to who is standing next to you.” U

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“Don’t ask, don’t tell” has been repealed How will those born 30 years from now understand this change?

Ryan Clayton Contributor This is a historic moment. I don’t think we can comprehend what this will be like twenty or thirty years down the road. However, I realized that this entire situation reminded me of my days of high school social studies. I was brought back to the good old days of sitting in a computer lab, listening to my grizzled teacher talk about days long gone when women couldn’t vote, blacks couldn’t serve in the military and Chinese people were charged a head tax to immigrate to Canada.

Human rights have taken many different forms and have been a part of the lives of millions of people. People of every sex, gender identity, religion, ethnicity, ability, sexual orientation, race and culture have been affected by the struggle for human rights. Our history is peppered with battles both legal and military: the crusades, the Holocaust, the suffragist movement, the civil rights movement and the gay rights movement.

I don’t think we can comprehend what this will be like 20 or 30 years down the road.

One day we will have children, or nephews, or friends’ kids who will want us to explain “Don’t ask, don’t tell.”

They will ask the same things we did back in high school social studies: How could people have been so bigoted? Ignorant? Cruel?

We will have to explain that there was a time when people actually believed that LGBT people were somehow inferior because of their sexual orientation and for that reason were not allowed to marry, serve in the military or donate blood or organs (the later is still true in Canada). We will have to explain that there were places in the world where being gay actually meant being put to death, or having to apply to another country as a refugee to survive. We will tell stories of the battle for equal rights for gay and lesbian people that will seem as incredible to the youth of tomorrow as the civil rights movement does to the youth of today.

Hopefully their children will laugh at them, as we sometimes laugh at our racist or sexist relatives, and label them “stuck in their old ways.”

I can only imagine the situation of those who will one day have to admit to their children and grandchildren that they fought against equal rights for LGBT people. Hopefully their children will laugh at them, as we sometimes laugh at our racist or sexist relatives, and label them “stuck in their old ways.” Hopefully these children will also recognize that there were thousands of progressive people who fought for human rights, and that not all members of our generation are backwards.

But no matter how close we come to our goals, we cannot forget that this is an ever-growing fight.

Gays were a llowed to ser ve openly in ancient times—in fact, it was encouraged. To classical-era Greeks, gay men were t hought to be t he best soldiers because their passion would give t hem t he strength to defend t heir fellows on the batt lef ield. Then t here wa s a n upheava l of changing values and cultures.

Theocracies and restrictive monarchies arose, causing a shift towards a culture based on procreation and population growth, which led to the persecution of gays and lesbians as immoral (along with a whole slew of other ‘immoral’ people, such as women who practiced medicine).

One day we will have children, or nephews, or friends’ kids who will want us to explain Don’t ask, don’t tell. How could people have been so bigoted?

Ignorant? Cruel?

So when we one day explain to youth about the closed-mindedness of the culture we were raised in, do not forget to remind them that they must also be vigilant, for there have always been shifts in values, culture and power, and it will be the youth of tomorrow who will stand on the front lines of both defence and offence.

Because of the importance of this, because of the gravity of human rights, even if they don’t ask, we’ll still have to tell.

But no matter how close we come to our goals, we cannot forget that this is an evergrowing fight.

In the meantime, congratulations to the US House of Representatives, Senate and President for getting it right. U The bill repealing Don’t ask, don’t tell in the US was signed into law on December 22, 2010.

This is an excerpt from Ryan Clayton’s blog, found on ryanclayton.ca.

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Poetry & Lit Honesty

An open letter to Dear Abby

Teenage Trangst Poem

Kira Contributor

Jade McGregor Contributor

The girl who never was and the boy who cannot be.

To be honest is not a mistake, It is a way for the heart to awake.

To be true to one’s own heart, Allows one to heal, part by part.

Dear Abby,

Love is given to whomever it is true, And true it should be, despite what others would do.

Love lies inside, and inside it is clear, We are who we are, and we are right here.

To be honest is not a mistake, It is a way for the heart to awake.

To be true to one’s own heart, Allows one to heal, part by part.

Male or female is not a choice outside, Gendered chains by which we must abide, Yet within the answer is clear, We are what we are, and we are right here.

To be honest is not a mistake, It is a way for the heart to awake.

To be true to one’s own heart, Allows one to heal, part by part.

Despite the twists life loves to throw, Look inside and one will know which way to go.

Life holds many a beginning and end, And even plights we all must defend.

To be honest is not a mistake, It is a way for the heart to awake.

To be true to one’s own heart, Allows one to heal, part by part.

I live in a network of friends and family that are nearly all straight, and lately I have been experiencing extreme pressure. After much consideration I have mustered the courage to finally admit my problem and seek your help.

I am the token gay. I am supposed to have a sixth sense, to know who is gay and who is not. I am supposed to be the expert, look into my rainbow crystal ball and have all the answers. I feel like I constantly let everyone down!

I fear my gaydar may be indefinitely broken. Is there any way that it can be reinstalled? Am I the only one out here? Please, Abby, help me in my journey to become a normal homosexual!

Overwhelmed, J.

Dallas Bennett Contributor A face unknown.

Hollow, Lacking, Vacant.

It stares.

Bones grow out of place, Bulging, twisting, breaking up straight lines.

Blood follows, a screaming pain that cannot be subdued.

It drips, smears, stains.

Tainted.

Confusion sets in.

Mass hysteria?

Cells divide and concur, an uncontrollable growth.

The heart longs to love, but is trapped within a cage of bones and mounds of flesh.

An unfamiliar home.

The mirror reflects lies, which cannot be proven incorrect.

Untrained eyes, cannot view the falsehood, of this perceived womanhood.

I’ve grown tired of lying and I’ve grown sick of telling the truth only to be told it’s a lie.

Ze.

2011.02.03/ubyssey.ca/advertisement/9

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sports

editor MARIE VONDRACEK » sports@ubyssey.ca

UBC swimmers soak up acclaim Thunderbirds take home double gold at conference championships Noah Burshtein Contributor Historically, there have always been two teams, on both the men’s and women’s sides, that nobody wants to face. The UBC Thunderbirds and Calgary Dinos have collectively dominated the sport of university swimming, capturing 32 Canada West Swim Championships since 1994. While other competitive programs such as the University of Alberta and UVic were present to compete, this weekend’s championships were all about which of the two powerhouse programs could take home first place.

And thankfully for the home crowd at the Aquatic Centre, UBC prevailed.

The Thunderbird men led throughout the weekend, and closed the door on Calgary on Sunday night, winning three events while placing highly in many others. UBC’s men ended up beating Calgary (and the many other schools who placed lower) 926.5 to 703.5, a distinct margin for a team battling a Dino squad that was coming off a national championship victory.

After the victory, UBC head coach Chad Webb proudly said that “The guys got better and

better through the week,” adding “a lot of them are in some hard training and they fought tooth and nail all weekend.”

The journey towards t he championship didn’t go as smoothly for the Thunderbird women, who headed into the final day of competition behind the Dinos in the overall points standings.

The UBC women, winners of last year’s title, used their experience to their advantage, managing to overtake Calgary after the 200m Individual Medley.

“They battled right until the last event. They showed a lot of heart and determination like we have all season and that just stems from the hard work they put in every day at the pool,” Webb said about his women’s back-to-back title effort. In the end, that effort was enough to edge out Calgary, and gave UBC a solid 1114-999 win.

While less important to all the teams involved, there were several individual records set during the weekend, including six gold medals won by the Thunderbirds.

Several conference record times were shattered by UBC, with an especially impressive performance by sophomore Shaneese Nowlan, who destroyed the rest of the field in the 200m

games & comics

UBC’s swim team is proving hard to beat.

Butterfly to earn herself a conference record.

Now it’s time for both teams to compete at a national level, something Coach Webb is convinced they can do.

“They were tired coming into the meet, but they did a great job rallying. They were solid in every event and it’s this kind of team that will be able to compete for a national title” he said.

charles to Photo/The Ubyssey

These Thunderbird swimmers hope he’s right, and will certainly set out to prove him so at the CIS national championships in Calgary February 24-26. U

sudoku (medium)

sazaemon, by meiki shu

suscomic.com, by michael bround

solution

Submit your comics to our website at ubyssey.ca/volunteer/ submit-a-comic. virginie menard | production@ubyssey.ca

U theubyssey.ca

2011.02 .03/ubyssey.ca /opinions/11

opinions

do you care? WRITE US A LETTER » feedback@ubyssey.ca

editorial concerning the engineers, redux There were more than a couple of thin-skinned engineers who were unable to see what we were trying to say in our editorial last issue. Halfway through a mostly uneventful E-Week, we’re going to try again—in a more direct and perhaps less inflammatory manner.

There once was a day when engineers were outrageous characters on campus, alternatively thrilling and enraging students. They kidnapped Ubyssey editors, had an annual Lady Godiva march where a naked woman would travel through campus on a horse, published a sexist magazine called The Red Rag and had pranks, traditions and chants that all students on campus knew, whether they wanted to or not.

But this changed. Engineers once had a reputation for sexism and boorishness. At the same time, they also had a reputation for causing havoc and being the most engaging faculty on campus. And while the EUS has done an admirable job of scrubbing the former from their reputation, they’ve also become, in many ways, just another faculty on campus, no longer punching above their weight when it comes to engaging with the rest of us. And we prefer students that engage with all of UBC. As a university and community, we are stronger when groups come together to put on events and create clubs that reach out to all students.

Mardi Gras and Cold Fusion. Welcome Back BBQ and Storm the Wall. The Night of a Thousand Stars, CVC Talent Shows and yes, UBC’s Got Talent. Events like these are what make this campus a truly dynamic place, reminding us we are, more than a degree factory, a collection of some of the most creative people in Canada and a place that lives up to the ideals of our mottos.

That, more than anything else, is what we love about UBC, and it’s those times when this campus becomes truly awesome.

But then there’s Arts County Fair and 4000 people at a T-Birds game. The Radical Beer Faction and Students for a Democratic Society. Friday beer gardens. All things that have slowly died off on this campus just in the last few years, and it would be incredibly sad if engineers let them go by the wayside.

EUS President Amanda Li commented on our editorial by writing, in part, the following: “Coming onto E-Week, we’re hosting 28 events, of which only two are beer heavy. With last year’s numbers, we’re expecting 100-800 students at each event. Our opening ceremonies, just a few hours ago, hosted 150+ engineers on a Sunday night!

Two of our design teams have just come back from international competitions and placed extremely well. We just sent a delegation of 40 engineers to the Western Engineering Competition and placed first place in debate for the fourth time in a row. I guess this type of news is boring to students compared to the supposed lack of rivalry between engineers and The Ubyssey?”

She’s right, of course; those are all cool things.

Should writers pick them up, we’ll probably cover them—as we’ve done for other stories about engineers this year. But the unavoidable truth of Amanda’s response is that they’re all events and competitions done by engineers, for engineers. It’s a few hundred students from one particular group celebrating their spirit and accomplishments. Wh ich is what t ends t o happen—engineers attend their competitions, Commerce students put on their conferences, each group on campus does things solely for their members and UBC becomes a little less rich for it.

Our completely over the top insults (‘lepers’) were meant as a ribbing, a roast, a good-natured provocation. If you are truly offended by our hyperbole, we do regret that.

But the challenge is still there. Use your smarts and pranks to bring more colour to campus. We’re not asking you to put a naked lady on a horse or crucify an AMS President like you once did. We can’t turn back the clock, because those are bad ideas. But that doesn’t mean we have to erase that chapter of history entirely. U

maria cirstea graphic/the ubyssey

opinions

Katic: AMS doesn’t understand why apathy exists Gordon Katic Columnist For the average student, the AMS remains virtually invisible. Nothing could better demonstrate that fact than the dismal 11 per cent voter participation in the recent elections.

Despite this abject failure, neither the councillors nor the campus media seem particularly worried. We’ve heard passionate disapproval of the many dirty tactics used in this election (this paper went so far as to call for the elections to be annulled), but there has been little willingness to discuss the cause of the low turnout.

Quite simply, people aren’t voting because there is little reason to believe that AMS representatives are at all concerned with the issues facing ordinary students. The condescending campaign material is full of vague platitudes, with scant evidence that candidates have thought through the issues at all.

If you care to venture into Council chambers, you’ll realize that the elected representatives are only worse, concerned more with self-aggrandizement and vindictive political squabbles than anything. The noxious selfserving politician is exemplified by

our current president, who only recently threatened to sue Council lest they censure him. This heinous legal intimidation is indeed worthy of the utmost scorn, but Bijan Ahmadian should not give us the impression that it is but one man who is responsible for the troubles of the AMS. A recent case will serve to demonstrate this problem to be a systemic one.

In a Council discussion regarding the enormous $140,000 budget crisis, Council imagined new “brand strategies” and PR campaigns to fix the image of the AMS, so as to pass a coming fee referendum and improve business revenue.

In discussing strategies to promote struggling AMS businesses, a Commerce student who made a presentation said the surest way to increase business revenue would be to correct the unfavourable perception of the AMS as a whole. Councillors and executives urged each other to better manage their interactions with campus media, and to prevent leaks of classified Council material.

This lengthy discussion was rather illuminating, because it immediately became clear to me that Council doesn’t think of us as students, but as consumers who have lost faith in a

brand. There was no mention of the many ways in which the AMS is radically failing students, like crippling cuts to key services such as Safewalk (the entire budget for student services has been reduced by a whopping 23 per cent since last year).

Nor was there mention of last year’s damning report on equity, diversity and discrimination in the AMS, which revealed “systemic discrimination” and “an unwillingness to engage in reform.”

Nor was there mention of the fact that the AMS refuses to lobby for reduced tuition fees, despite the student body passing a referendum stating unequivocally that they’d like it to be AMS policy.

In discussing the AMS brand strategy, but ignoring the very issues students care about, Council seems determined to deceive us into believing we have a real student union. Like the many candidates with their vacuous platforms, our representatives don’t seem particularly concerned with how the AMS is radically failing students. That’s why only 11 per cent of us bothered to vote. U Gordon Katic’s column will appear every Thursday in The Ubyssey.

letter Re: “Concerning the Engineers” It’s clear this art icle was just a shameless attempt to try to coax the engineers into doing something entertaining and if you take it from that perspective, I’m able to chuckle at it.

But times have changed. Engineering students want something different and so their society has changed to accommodate it. They do not exist for your entertainment.

Not only have engineering student needs changed with the passing of time but so has law enforcement. Decades ago, when females started to join the ranks of males in the engineering program, male students would go around on the first day of classes and shorten their female counterparts’ dresses with shears by force.

Do you really think this kind of thing would be acceptable now? Students caught now participating in a multitude of the pranks that engineers used

to perform “back in the day” would be promptly expelled and face charges of harassment or assault.

Any abductions of The Ubyssey staff now would be staged. If you think jeering them into a performance is going to get you anywhere, then you’ve sadly underestimated them. Respect will get you more entertainment, not attempts at ripping them apart by their insecurities.

— Bowinn Ma EUS President, 2009-2010

Agree? Disagree? feedback@ubyssey.ca justin mcelroy | coordinating@ubyssey.ca

U theubyssey.ca

12/ubyssey.ca/our campus/2011.02.03

our campus

So you know those inter-faculty rivalries? They just keep on happening.

The Engineers’ cairn is traditionally defaced by a rag-tag group of students who symbolically make their mark for a few hours before it is erased. In this case, a band of ninja Arts students acquired yellow and purple paint during Arts Week and pollocked the shit out of it.

Engineers retaliated during E-Week by filling the Arts Undergraduate Society’s office with a mountain of crumpled Ubyssey newspapers. This is the best thing that’s ever happened to you, AUS execs. U

andrew hood photos/ the ubyssey

Virginie Menard production@ubyssey.ca