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23 October 2017

Page 1

Student newspaper of the University of Tulsa

October 23, 2017 Issue 9 - Volume 103

dre ss u p as a co llegi a n wri ter dre ss u p as a co llegi a n wri ter

m ake a ne ws b o y ca p: m ake a ne ws b o y ca p:

1. Cu t a lo ng th e 1. do t ted line s

2. Ta pe 2 poin ted . end s tog e th er Ta pe poin ted end s tog e th er

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Ta pe cur ved side s tog e th er

4. Cur ve under 4. o u t side edg e s, ta ping down Cur ve under o u t side edg e s, ta ping down

g raph ic by Madel i ne Woods

g raph ic by Madel i ne Woods

3. Ta pe3. cur ved side s tog e th er

5. ta pe 5. th e bi ll to th e bo t to m t eedg tafro pe nth bi ell to th e bo t to m fro n t edg e

6. Fla t ten b ack 6. of h a t sligh tly Fla t ten b ack of h a t sligh tly

More cos tu me ideas, p. 7 More cos tu me ideas, p. 7


Sports

23 October 2017

The Collegian: 2

New faces impress for the Golden Hurricane In preseason scrimmages, Tulsa’s basketball teams showed off their talent for the upcoming season. The men’s team features several new players who will look to make a big impact in 2017-18. Justin Guglielmetti Sports Editor

photos by Dalton Stewart

Martins Igbanu attacks the rim against USF. With the start of the 2017-18 season just a few weeks away, the TU men’s and women’s basketball teams took the floor on Saturday for twenty minute intersquad scrimmages, giving the public its first real look at what to expect from the Golden Hurricane this year. I was only able to catch the very end of the women’s game so I won’t have much in terms of analysis until their season starts. For the men on the other hand, it’s clear that things are looking up. Coming off a disappointing ’16-’17 season, the men’s team will seek to improve from continuity if nothing else; they will return four starters and eight total letterwinners. They look to be much deeper this year as well, adding four new players who all appear talented enough to secure spots in the rotation. Freshman Elijah Joiner was particularly impressive. The 18-year-old out of Curie Metropolitan High School in Chicago played with a poise and herky-jerky technicality well beyond his years. Though he lists Derrick Rose as his favorite player (no surprise given his hometown), Joiner’s style is far more reminiscent of Paul Pierce or Andre Miller. He appeared at all times to be one of the least athletic players on the floor and lacks impressive handles for someone so balldominant, but Joiner still managed to get to his spots with ease. He has a beautiful jumper and was lights out from beyond the arc, shooting 4-7 on his way to a game-high 15 points. Still, one has to wonder whether his limited foot speed will be exposed against D1 opponents. He was able to more than

Sterling Taplin takes it to the paint.

hold his own against Sterling Taplin, but on that count Taplin may be more to blame. Taplin, the Golden Hurricane’s starting point guard and the lone returning member from TU’s First Four appearance two years ago, seems to fancy himself a young Kyrie Irving. He loves to bring the ball up slowly then pound the living hell out of it, daring defenders with every high dribble to reach so he can blow by them with a quick crossover. Taplin operates with all the contemptuous braggadocio of a floor general who knows he’s totally in command of the court. Unfortunately, the rest of his play doesn’t back that up. Though I hesitate to make a criticism based on one scrimmage, Taplin once again displayed his most frustrating tendency from seasons past: a refusal to drive to the basket. A player with his handle, athleticism and now bulk (he looks to have added at least ten pounds of muscle) should be able to get into the paint at will and create all sorts of mismatches on defense. The smoothest TU’s offense looked all day was when Taplin rocketed past the switch on a pick and roll and found freshman Darien Jackson lurking on the baseline, who then fed the rock to a rim-running Martins Igbanu for an uncontested lay-in. It was gorgeous, snappy basketball, and this team needs more of that after the clogged toilet scheme that they ran last year. Coach Frank Haith has praised his roster’s unselfishness and willingness to share the ball, but a motion-based, everyonetouches-the-ball offense only gets you so far with a group that has a limited number of

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Corey Henderson rises up for three.

playmakers. Keep things simple: hand over the keys to Taplin, run pick-and-rolls until you get the switch you want and let him go to work. This shouldn’t be a difficult decision to make, not when you have an ideal power forward to work with him on this kind of two-man game. Junior Etou was named to the preseason American Conference second team after leading the Golden Hurricane in scoring, rebounding and three-point shooting. Etou is a big body and a fine athlete, but it’s his ability to hit from deep that makes him special. The threat of a pick and pop should prevent defenses from trying to trap Taplin on every possession. Incidentally, Etou didn’t look great at the scrimmage but he’s a guy you can’t be too worried about; the whole college basketball world knows he got game. My one concern for Junior was that he would be pressured to play inside-out after the unexpected loss of Will Magnay left a gaping hole at center. Thankfully, that space looks like it will be filled just fine by Martins Igbanu. The sophomore from Lagos, Nigeria is only 6’8”, but the dude is built like a tank and won’t be pushed around easily by opposing bigs. He’s also clearly spent time working on his post game over the summer, showing off a silky turnaround jumper on his way to 13 points on 6-8 shooting. Igbanu impressed in limited minutes last year, with more exposure he could develop into one of the best big men in the conference. Expect a spot in the starting lineup and regular double-doubles in 2017-18. Some other assorted thoughts from the game: junior transfer DaQuan Jeffries is an absolutely freakish athlete. Though he often looked as if he was floating in space on both ends of the floor, the 6’5” Jeffries showed off a dynamic playmaking streak

reminiscent of Shaq Harrison. He scored 12 points and delivered the highlight of the game when he jumped a passing lane and delivered a monster slam that saw his head reach the rim. Another stud: fellow transfer Curran Scott. The former top-150 high school prospect from Edmond returned to Oklahoma after a short tenure in Charlotte and looked every bit as good as advertised. He operated mostly from the midrange in the scrimmage but showed off a smooth three-point stroke during warmups. He’ll fill the sixth man void left by Pat Birt and hopefully take all of Lawson Korita’s minutes. I have nothing against Lawson personally and never like to speak ill of my fellow students, but I just can’t figure this man out. His only discernible skill on the court appears to be shooting, and that “skill” amounted to 26 percent from deep on a nearly seven shot per 40 minute pace. Nothing looks different this year. No thank you. In the same vein, I feel like I’m missing something with Jaleel Wheeler. Guy played heavy minutes with Etou, Taplin and Birt last year and ranked second on the team in points, rebounds and assists so he’s obviously got the favor of coach Haith. Even so, he just doesn’t look all that talented to me. Jumper is broken, he’s not a very creative passer, doesn’t seem to have a natural position. I suppose Wheeler’s not a bad defender, but even then he’s a bit undersized for a two guard. Speaking of size, that could end up being the Golden Hurricane’s kryptonite this year. I’ve already sung Igbanu’s praises but he will still be playing out of position and TU’s rotation looks dicy behind him. Rail-thin Geno Artison and undersized Jeriah Horne will compete for those minutes and neither looks to offer much on the offensive end.


Sports

The Collegian: 3

Tulsa suffers heartbreak in Hartford After a pitiful first half showing, TU’s last minute push came up short, all but eliminating the team’s chances at a bowl game.

bleacher creature?

appointment. When the rushing defense finally puts forth a solid effort, only allowing 69 yards with 1.6 average yards per carry, the secondary gives Connecticut free reign downfield. When it seems Skipper has finally found his mojo, the rushing game suffers a setback with powerhouse back D’Angelo Brewer on the bench for undisclosed reasons, leaving Brooks to plow ahead alone. Of course, that specific example is not the fault of anyone in particular, but it does add one more item to the ever-growing list of frustrations. Apart from the honest miracle that was the Homecoming victory, there hasn’t been a single game in which both the offense and the defense have been effective across the board. That is a clear formula for failure and is an issue that has to become priority number one in terms of what needs to be fixed. Of all the games left this season, this was the one Tulsa was supposed to win; likewise, it was a game Tulsa could not afford to lose if they had any hope of postseason play. It does not bode well for the remainder of the schedule and fills this reporter with dread at the prospect of writing up four more losses. Looking ahead to next week’s game in Dallas against SMU, this team must search for something to fight for. Fight for pride. Fight to avenge a disappointing first eight games. Fight to end this season on some higher notes and get over the sting of losses to teams like New Mexico and UConn. Fight to improve as players. Fight to work together and avoid minute mistakes. If no one steps up and resolves to restore consistency, the issues which have plagued the 2017 Golden Hurricane could also infect next year’s squad. And that would be the biggest heartbreak yet.

Pour one out for missed opportunities Gordon Hayward’s injury during the first quarter of the Celtics’ season opener against the Cavaliers almost made me throw up. Then it almost made me cry. Hayward, his perfectly quaffed undercut gleaming under the bright lights of Quicken Loans Arena, went up for what looked like a spectacular alley-oop from Kyrie Irving before coming down awkwardly on his left ankle. His whole leg buckled, a loud crack echoed throughout the hushed arena and just like that, his season was over. I’m not sad because this ruins any chance of Boston overtaking the Cavs in the East (though it does). This is devastating because the career of one of the most hardworking, exciting and underappreciated players in the league is now in jeopardy. Ankle injuries as severe as Hayward’s are a difficult thing to come back from and even when (if?) he does play again, he’ll likely be short of his trademark explosiveness. Additional condolences to Jeremy Lin, who ruptured the patella tendon in his right knee.

Men’s soccer struggles continue in American With a chance to get back above .500, TU dropped two more matches to bring their AAC losing streak to four games. Joe Edmonds Sports Correspondent In a pair of chances this week, the Golden Hurricane men’s soccer team struggled to find their stride against conference opponents. The first matchup was a road game against UCF. Tulsa kept pace in the first half, as neither team could find an advantage. Unfortunately, the second half was subsequently dominated by the Knights. They put three goals on the board in quick succession and took the victory with a 3-0 score. Tulsa returned home on Satuwrday night to face off against Temple. The match started off well, as Miguel Velasquez scored a goal to take the lead in less than two minutes. But TU couldn’t hold

onto the lead for long. Temple found their first goal ten minutes in, and then added another ten minutes later to take the lead for the first time. The game was closed out when Temple got their third score by way of a penalty kick with five minutes remaining, as they took the 3-1 win. After the losses, Tulsa is 4-7-1 (1-4 American Athletic Conference) on the season, their early triumph over number one ranked Stanford now a distant memory. Next up is a nonconference matchup against Saint Louis on Tuesday evening. Start time is 7 p.m. The women’s soccer team was not in action this week. They return to play on Friday night at 7 p.m. against the Memphis Tigers.

Hurricane Scoreboard Football Oct. 21: UConn 20 - Tulsa 14

Women’s Soccer Oct. 15: East Carolina 1 - Tulsa 0

Volleyball Oct. 15: Wichita St. 3 - Tulsa 0 Oct. 20: Temple 3 - Tulsa 1

Men’s Soccer Oct. 15: UCF 3 - Tulsa 0

31

Monday

Tuesday 23

Women’s Golf vs. Charleston

Wednesday 24

Men’s Soccer vs. Saint Louis 7 p.m.

Women’s Golf vs. Charleston

25

No Events

Thursday

I’m with Houston (eye twitches) This was tough, I almost didn’t come into work on Sunday following the Yankees’ shellacking at the hands of the Houston Astros. I know what you’re thinking: “4-0? It’s not like it was some embarrassing blowout!” That’s true Devil’s Advocate voice inside my head, except these are the Bronx Bombers we’re talking about, the second most prolific offense in baseball, and they were held to a grand total of one run over their final two games despite all that positive momentum from winning three in a row at Yankee Stadium. Oh and Lance McCullers shut them down by throwing nothing but curveballs, nearly all of which were down and away. Who replaced the Yankees with a bunch of Pedro Cerranos?? Just leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Still, I’ll be rooting for the Astros in the World Series. It’s typically a policy of mine to root for the teams that beat my own so I can say “yeah we lost to those guys, but so did everyone else” (the Red Sox are an obvious exception) but there’s more to it than that this year. Supporting the Dodgers may actually be unethical. Justin Turner is hitting like peak Barry Bonds and is threatening to cement himself as an actual postseason legend. We can’t allow allow that to happen for a balding ginger who insists on wearing his remaining hair shoulder length. Blegh! Clayton Kershaw has said that he would retire if he won the World Series this year because he’s got nothing left to accomplish. Um, don’t do that Clay-bae. What about cementing yourself as the greatest pitcher of all time, isn’t that something?? (He was most likely joking but still). Oh and there’s also the fact that Houston’s had a rough go of it recently. Between their football team’s loss to TU, Chris Paul’s injury and...you know...Harvey, this city needs a win. Go ’Stros! Matt Rechtien nods proudly God when did Bleacher Creature get so morbid? What should we close on? How about the Las Vegas Golden Knights! Unlike my predecessor Matt Rechtien I’m not the biggest hockey guy so I won’t be able to provide much in terms of analysis. But you don’t need to be Barry Melrose to know that 6-1 is a damn fine way to start a franchise. Heard the Blues are off to a pretty good start as well!

Oct. 23 - Oct. 29 Saturday

Friday

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27

Women’s Soccer vs. Memphis Volleyball 7 p.m.

vs. ECU 7 p.m.

Justin Guglielmetti is…

the

Zane Cawthon Sports Correspondent Tulsa football experienced another dip in their roller coaster of a season as they suffered their sixth defeat in their first ever clash with Connecticut on Saturday, stumbling to 2-6 on the year and 1-3 in American Conference play. The vast majority of the game in East Hartford was a miserable affair, with a very bland 3-0 halftime score and a combined total of 11 punts from both teams through the first three quarters. The TU secondary was nowhere to be found as UConn QB Bryant Shirreffs had a career game with 372 passing yards, a 79% completion rate, and one impressive touchdown (an 80-yard rainbow pass to receiver Hergy Mayala). Also absent from this week’s game was the Tulsa offensive line, which allowed a mediocre defense to sack TU QB Luke Skipper six times and commit eleven tackles behind the line of scrimmage. Shirreffs’ accuracy and TU’s inconsistency on both sides of the ball translated to a 20-0 Connecticut lead midway through the 4th quarter before Tulsa finally answered. RB Shamari Brooks led the way with 164 yards and a determination seldom seen in a true freshman, scoring both TU touchdowns to cut the Huskies’ lead to six with two minutes remaining. TU actually had a chance to win the game after yet another UConn punt with less than a minute to go, but a potential touchdown pass to Keenen Johnson on the very last play was broken up in the end zone. It is astonishing how this team finds so many different ways to lose. The plethora of problems this season have doomed Tulsa fans to a year of hair-pulling exasperation and head-hanging dis-

23 October 2017

Football @ SMU 8 p.m.

28

Cross Country @ AAC Championship Volleyball vs. Cincinnati 12 p.m. Men’s Soccer vs. Cincinnati 7 p.m.

Sunday

29

No Events


23 October 2017

News

The Collegian: 4

A discussion on cannabis law anticipating state question

Daniel Zemke

TU Law Alumnus and practicing attorney in Colorado, Daniel Zemke, spoke to an audience about cannabis law ahead of Oklahoma’s 2018 state question. Alex Garrofolo Student Writer One of the biggest lies Daniel Zemke hears on a daily basis at his law practice in Telluride, CO is “my weed is the best. It’s organic.” As Zemke explains, no marijuana can be certified organic because to the FDA, it’s an illegal substance. This balance, between states that vote to allow medical and/or recreational use and the federal government that treats it as a Schedule

I substance, is one Oklahoma might have to strike very soon. State question 788 will appear on the ballot next November, during the mid-term election cycle. The question would legalize marijuana for medical use in Oklahoma with some stipulations. To read more detail on the measure, go to ballotpedia.org and search “Oklahoma state question 788.” “A key distinction Colorado had to make,” Zemke put it, “is categorizing the defining the three real branches of the industry: recreational, medical and care-givers.” Recreational is as it sounds: residents, after a certain age, may consume cannabis products without proven medical need. Medicinal allows doctors to prescribe marijuana treatments to those with a medical card. Zemke said even in Colorado, it’s still relatively easy to obtain a medical card. Doctors must be convinced that a patient has “severe pain” or other debilitating illness. Caregivers do not sell marijuana. A caregiver is simply a person who receives payment for providing medical marijuana advice and health advice. Colorado has the Marijuana Enforcement Division (MED), which oversees all rules and regulations for medical and recreational use. This might be something Oklahoma would create as well. The MED controls licensing, tax-

ing, testing of product, inspection of facilities, taxes and anything else marijuana related. Colorado keeps it tightly regulated. Currently, the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) classifies THC, the active drug in marijuana, as Schedule I. This means it “has a high potential for abuse and/or no accepted medical use.” As more studies come out showing potential positive effects of pot use, more states nationwide are taking a look at their drug codes. Just in January, the DEA added hemp to the Schedule I list. Hemp has .3 percent THC. In 2009, the Department of Justice issued the Ogden Memorandum, telling law enforcement nationwide that it was a “low priority” of the federal government to prosecute medical marijuana cases. In short, it cleared the way for more states to make medical legal. The system still has kinks. One problem that could arise in Oklahoma is the issue of banks handling cash from an industry that’s still federally illegal. Zemke said that “to combat this, those who deal in marijuana must have the best accountants possible. Document everything.” Legalized marijuana is still a cash-only business. A large part to consider about medical passing in Oklahoma is the impact on the state revenues. Already this year, Colorado’s state revenues

are in excess of $181.9 million. Currently, the Oklahoma legislature is in special session to figure out what to do about the state’s budget deficit. According to the Colorado Governor’s office: 30 percent of this money goes to youth drug prevention programs, 28 percent to substance abuse treatment centers, and 26 percent to public education in the state. Zemke showed the audience slides that predict the marijuana industry will grow at a 25 percent compound growth rate through 2021. This “green rush” is comparable to cable TV in the 1990s (19 percent growth) and internet in the 2000s (29 percent growth). Those figures mean by 2021, legal marijuana in the United States will be a $20.2 billion business. Lastly, Zemke advised the audience to “sell the picks and shovels.” “Medical marijuana is here to stay,” he exclaimed. “There are already too many states that have turned the tide.” Above all, Zemke finished with a quote by 2012 Colorado Governor Jeff Hickenlooper, who was governor when recreational marijuana passed in the state. “The War on Drugs was a disaster. It sent millions of kids to prison, gave them felonies when they often times didn’t have violent crimes...I can see why so many people supported it.” State Question 788 will be on the ballot in November 2018.

courtesy University of Tulsa

courtesy University of Tulsa

SA makes Homecoming 2017 a resounding success Student Association’s Executive Director of Homecoming Claire Chapman discusses the best parts of Homecoming. Alex Garrofolo Student Writer 2017’s Homecoming theme was “Stay Gold.” A nod to the famous novel, “The Outsiders”, written by TU undergrad and Tulsa native, S.E. Hinton, 50 years ago. The TU Alumni Association chooses the theme each year. Student Association took charge of every event during homecoming week up until the bonfire. From Sunday’s kickoff to Friday’s alumni breakfast, SA made sure the events ran smoothly. The person in charge of making sure SA made them go smoothly? Claire Chapman. The sophomore served as associate director of Homecoming last year. This year, she stepped up to the department’s main role: executive director. She said a group of four associate directors and herself met once a week for months preparing for the event. “As it got closer, we met twice a week, if not more,” she added. Homecoming takes a lot of work and preparation. As Chapman put it “we want to make it as inclusive and worthwhile an event as possible for all students.” 17 organizations took part in the street painting competition and the yard board competition. The boards stood on display in front of McFarlin. The paint is on eighth street, between the Reynolds stadium and Mabee Gym. It will stay on the concrete until weather and vehicular traffic erode it.

Other events went well too. “I’m really happy about the turnout for the scavenger hunt,” Chapman acknowledged. “22 teams was more than anticipated. Which is fantastic.” Every event had over 500 students in attendance according to data from ID swipes. Normal amounts for years past have been capped around 450 students per event. The combined team of Tri-Delta, Alpha Kappa Alpha and Phi Mu Alpha won the week’s overall competition, beating teams made of other Greek organizations and residence halls. When asked if she planned to take the helm once more next year, Chapman chuckled: “I’ll probably decide in March. I’ll be taking the MCAT next year, and need to prioritize that before anything else.” She also expressed SA’s desire to be as open and inclusive towards student needs as possible. “Any student is welcome to come to Cabinet meetings. We meet every Tuesday at 5 PM in Chouteau,” she informed. It’s on the second floor of ACAC. She also said that the current SA president, Andrew Hanson, is very open to new ideas from any student. The organization works to be as inclusive as possible. According to Chapman, SA is always looking for ideas from those outside the organization. “The more voices and ideas we get, the better we can serve students.” In that vein, Chapman plans to send out a survey to students in three weeks. “I want students’ honest opinions of how homecoming went, what we did well and what we can do better” she explained. Based on that information, SA can make changes to make next year’s homecoming an even larger success. Look for the email in your TU email inbox in the coming weeks.

Tulsa goes Full Steam Ahead to integrate arts into STEM Tulsa recently hosted a new workshop to help promote STEM careers for children, especially girls. Ethan Veenker Variety Editor “In the past 10 years, job positions in science, technology, engineering and math have grown at three times the speed of NonSTEM jobs,” reads the “About Us” page on Full STEAM Ahead’s website. Full STEAM Ahead is a workshop formed by CodeVA, a non-profit based out of Virginia. Its purpose is to pique the interests of children in regards to the STEM fields, with an emphasis on girls. “Our mission is to empower and enrich young women in their pursuit of STEAM,” they declare on Full STEAM’s website. To achieve this, Full STEAM Ahead integrates the arts, adding an A to STEM: STEAM. The classes are held on the third Saturday of every month at the Gilcrease Museum. “Each class is a different investigation and exploration of art and science,” reads the description of the event on TU’s events calendar. Such investigation includes “building bridges, art through kinetic motion and chemical reactions,” the page goes on to say. Full STEAM Ahead seeks to even out the gender gap in the STEM fields. “Women make up 57 percent of American college graduates, but account for less than 25% of positions held in science, technology, engineering and math,” reads their site. It goes on to cite studies that detail children of both genders being equally interested in STEM topics until the eighth grade, at which point female interest tapers off due to “outdated stereotypes, unconscious bias,

cultural and media portrayals and the subsequent misguided perceptions young women internalize about themselves.” Full STEAM Ahead posits that the integration of arts increases the critical thinking capacities of the students in the workshop, as well as their generalized scores on standardized tests, such as the ACT and the SAT. “Through the inclusion of the arts, our students build the toolboxes they need to be the innovators of tomorrow,” their site reads. It also specifies that the workshops are led by women, given that girls provided with role models in STEM fields have their eyes opened to their own, personal possibilities in those fields. “We expand participatory pathways for middle school girls by offering choices of hands on workshops led by diverse women working in the fields,” the site reads. “To remain competitive in global markets, America must expand its workforce of capable STEM professionals,” reads Full STEAM’s site, and through their integration of girls into STEM fields, they’re making good strides to alleviate this problem as well as the gender ratio problem TU’s events calendar specifies the workshop as being specifically for students aged eight through twelve. It lasts two hours, 1-3 p.m., for each Saturday it’s hosted. The class is $8 for members, $10 for non-members. A discrepancy arises when, on the events calendar, the workshop being for girls-only is not specified. It uses the word “children.” On Full STEAM’s website, however, the program is clearly set up for a female student body. Neither party was available for comment in order to clear this up, but it can be assumed that the Gilcrease’s hosting of the program is still tailored for girls, in the true spirit of Full STEAM Ahead.


The Collegian: 5

Oct 9 9:20 a.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Mayo Village Apartments in regards to someone possibly needing help heard through a bathroom vent. Officers conducted a search of the surrounding apartments and were unable to locate anyone in distress in any of the surrounding apartments. 11:15 a.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to meet with a student in the Security Office. The student reported that their bicycle had been stolen from the bike rack on the north side of the Hurricane Plaza. The student reported that the bike had been locked and that the lock had been cut. Officers took the students statement and attempted to locate the bike. The investigation is on going. 6:00 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers received a report of a student possibly being harassed, off campus by a non-University affiliate, with whom the student had been previously in a dating relationship.

News 9:40 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Fisher West to investigate a TU student having signs of alcohol poisoning. Upon arrival officers spoke with the student and discovered that they had been drinking alone in their room. Emergency Medical Service Authority arrived, checked the student and due to their lack of coherence transported her to Hilcrest Medical Center. Oct 10 9:20 a.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Lottie Jane Mabee Hall for a report of an ill staff member. Officers made contact with the staff member who stated that they were feeling ill. The staff member felt that the illness may be due to suspicious activity. Emergency Medical Services Authority (EMSA) arrived and transported the staff member to Oklahoma State University Medical Center. 2:35 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to investigate a possible larceny of a bicycle at the Lorton Performance Center. Officers spoke with a student who stated that they had secured their bicycle at the Lorton Performance Center. The student returned the following day and noticed their bicycle lock had been and cut and their bicycle had been stolen. 5:05 p.m. While on routine patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers spoke with a student who reported 2 vehicles that had collided on Delaware Avenue. The vehicles pulled into the University Square Apartments West

Nathan Gibbons Distribution Manager

WHO rejects ambassador for Zimbabwe dictator After facing a global outcry of criticism, the World Health Organization rescinded a goodwill ambassador appointment given to Zimbabwe’s Robert Mugabe. Dr Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus, who was elected head of WHO in May, announced he was rescinding the appointment of Mugabe as a goodwill ambassador last weekend. “I have listened carefully to all who have expressed their concerns, and heard the different issues that they have raised,” Tedros said. “I have also consulted with the Government of Zimbabwe and we have concluded that this decision is in the best interests of the World Health Organization.” Earlier, Tedros had said Zimbabwe was committed to public health. Critics were quick to point out that under Mugabe’s 30-year rule, Zimbabwe’s healthcare system had collapsed. Mr. Mugabe himself goes abroad for medical treatment. Human rights abuse charges have recently been brought forward against Mugabe and Zimbabwe. Canada’s Justin Trudeau allegedly told reporters he thought the appointment “was a bad april fool’s joke.”

Spanish leaders deny “coup” against Catalonia Alfonso Dastis, the Spanish Foreign Minister, said last weekend that the Spanish government’s actions to reassert control over Catalonia do not amount to a coup. This comes after Carme Forcadell, a speaker for the Catalan Parliament, said Spain’s moves were a “de facto coup d’état.” The foreign minister was quick to respond, saying “If anyone has attempted a coup, it is the Catalan regional government.” He added, “If you look at the rest of democracies and certainly partners in the European Union, they wouldn’t accept a decision as such to be taken by a part of the country.” Madrid has taken further measures against Catalan leadership after they refused to shut down a referendum for independence. Led by President Carles Puigdemont, the Catalan government emphasizes that of the 43 percent of Catalan citizens who voted, 90 percent voted yes for independence from Spain. The independence referendum was a source of tension, and the Spanish government has come forward since the vote to apologise for the severity of police response. Foreign Minister Dastis told reporters that he believes many of the images of injured demonstrators were faked.

Cadets killed in latest attack in Afghanistan Afghan officials say at least 15 cadets were killed in a car bombing last Saturday that has since been claimed by the Taliban, bringing the death toll to around 200 killed by various militant groups in Afghanistan’s last week alone. Dawlat Wazin, a Defence Ministry spokesman, said four other cadets were also wounded in the suicide bombing which targeted a minibus as it left the gates of Marshal Fahim military academy. Last Friday, the Sunni Muslim militant group ISIS claimed responsibility for an attack that killed 56 at a Shia Muslim mosque. On the same day, an unclaimed attack on a Sunni Muslim mosque killed 20. Afghanistan has seen a rise in attacks in recent months by militants. Last Thursday, two Taliban suicide bombers killed 43 Afghan soldiers in the southern province of Kandahar when they attacked a military base. On two separate attacks last Tuesday, at least 30 people died in car bombings in Ghazni, and around 41 were killed when a police training center was stormed in the eastern city of Gardez.

23 October 2017

entrance. Officers investigated and learned those involved in the collision were non TU affiliated and had just pulled in to exchange insurance information. There were no injuries. Officers conducted traffic control at the entrance while the drivers exchanged their information. Officers advised they file an online police report. 7:30 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to a report of 2 individuals in the Bayless Plaza making harassing comments to pedestrians. Upon arrival, officers identified the 2 individuals as non-TU affiliated juveniles. Officers spoke with both individuals and witnesses before escorting both individuals from campus property. Officers explained the private property policies of the campus but did not issue a trespass warning. 11:40 p.m. While on routine patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers conducted a pedestrian check on an individual on the track. The individual was affiliated with the University of Tulsa. The individual stated they had jumped the fence to gain entry. The individual was escorted off the track. No contact card was issued. 7:55 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to University Square Apartments West to investigate a noise complaint. Officers spoke with the resident of the apartment and advised them that the noise level was too loud. The student agreed to keep the noise level down.

Oct 11 7:20 a.m. While on routine patrol University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers made contact with an individual who was rummaging through a dumpster in the parking lot of Oxley College of Health Sciences Building. The individual stated they were homeless and collecting items from the dumpster to sell. The individual was asked to leave and trespass warned from the building. A contact card was completed. The individual left without further incident. 3:00 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Hardesty Hall to investigate a report of marijuana possession. Officers searched the room and located marijuana and drug paraphernalia. Officers spoke with the student identified as the owner of the property. The student was informed that a student misconduct report would be completed for the incident. All contraband was seized and disposed of. 10:00 p.m. University of Tulsa Campus Security Officers were dispatched to Harwell Field to receive found property. The property was found by a University of Tulsa student. The property was a lanyard with keys. The owner was unable to be determined or contacted so the property was placed into the property locker for safe keeping. The Collegian does not produce or edit the Campus Crime Watch except for content and brevity.

Tuesday, October 24 at 7:30 p.m. Lorton Performance Center, Gussman Concert Hall Horror Film Screening: Nosferatu with Live Musical Score Performance Be properly frightened for Halloween by attending a free screening of F. W. Murnau’s famous 1922 German Expressionist silent horror film, Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror, with live original music score performed by the Northwest Arkansas-based Shadow Ensemble, directed by Ryan Cockerham. Nosferatu, an adaptation of Brian Stoker’s Dracula (1897), is considered one of the greatest horror films of all time. “Nosferatu” refers to “vampire.” Max Schreck stars as Count Orlok (name changed from “Count Dracula”). Wednesday, October 25 at 7:00 p.m. College of Law, Room 201 A Conversation with Alex Goldberg: Perspectives from the Midstream Sector of the Energy Industry Alex Goldberg is the executive vice president, general counsel and secretary of Continuum Energy, L.L.C. in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Continuum is a privately held natural gas midstream, producer services and crude oil logistics company providing a full range of services from the wellhead to the burner tip. Prior to joining, Williams, Goldberg was an associate at the Washington, D.C. law firm of Ross, Marsh and Foster. He received a B.S. in Geology from Colorado State University in 1984 and a J.D. from The University of Tulsa College of Law in 1987. Wednesday, October 25 at 5:00 to 6:00 p.m. Tyrrell Hall, 1065 (Auditorium) Last Lecture: “More than Medicine” hosted by TU Mortar Board Mortar Board invites Travis Lowe, Assistant Professor of Sociology, to speak on the patterns in disease and mortality using a sociological lens, bringing a fresh perspective to the study of health disparities in his lecture “More than Medicine: Using Sociology to Explain the Continental Health Divide” Thursday, October 26 at 7:30 p.m. Hardesty Hall, Room 1015 Multiculural Identity Mask Project Make a mask to share your culture, break stigmas and show the diversity of TU students! Pick up a blank mask at the Multicultural Resource Center October 23-27. We will have supplies to help decorate the masks, or you can take it and drop it off anonymously by October 27. Thursday, October 26 at 8:00 p.m. Fisher South Hurrican Thursday: Haunted Hall Come experinece a haunted house constructed throughout the floors of Fisher South. It’ll be sure to scare you’re pants off!

Saturday, October 28 at 7:00 p.m. The Anglican Vigor of Jane Austen’s Satire Anna Battigelli is the Bell Visiting Professor of Anglican and Ecumenical Studies at the University of Tulsa for fall 2017. She is a professor of English at SUNYPlattsburgh. Her specialty is Restoration and 18th-century English literature. She is the author of Margaret Cavendish and the Exiles of the Mind and has published on a variety of topics pertaining to the long 18th century. The Collegian does not produce all event descriptions in the Community Calendar. Contact us at news@tucollegian.org with events.


Commentary

The Collegian: 6

23 October 2017

Middle school sex education promotes safety

Children should be prepared to make safe sexual choices, and they need to be taught before they begin to make those decisions. Carlie Wiseley Distribution Manager A reportedly graphic sex education lesson has brought a Jay, Oklahoma, middle school under fire after parents saw a worksheet that was sent home with students. Jay superintendent Kenneth Bridges claims that he was unaware of the lesson plan and asked the middle school principal to end the program immediately, News on 6 reported.

have sex, it simply identifies them as sex. Parents are outraged over basic information meant to help students understand and make educated decisions about sex. Superintendent Bridges told News on 6 that the sex education curriculum came from the Connection Institute, part of LifeChoices Health Network, and has been used in several other school districts in the area. This is the second year that Jay has used the curriculum after the school board approved it last year. One parent said in a Facebook post that the lesson was co-ed and taught by outside instructors. While a co-ed lesson can be uncomfortable, and not the best choice for middle school students, it definitely is not unheard of. According to Superintendent Bridges the instructors were from Lighthouse Pregnancy Center in Jay. In the Facebook post, the parent also said that parents had not been made aware of the lesson plan and believes that the school district overstepped its role. Many teenagers only learn what constitutes sex by word of mouth, which is not always reliable and can skew teens’ percep-

sexually transmitted infections (STIs). According to Womenshealth.gov, STIs can be transmitted by having unprotected vaginal, oral or anal sex and through genital touching. A common misconception is that you can only get an STI by having penetrative sex, but teens need to be aware of the risk every time they engage in any sort of sexual activity. The trend for sex education in Oklahoma seems to be that there is little to none of it and that parents believe schools do not have the right to teach students about sex. The public school system in the United States has been entrusted to give children a basic

education to help them succeed in life, and a basic knowledge of human anatomy and sex should be included in that. Parents who believe that teens shouldn’t have even the simplest understanding of sex aren’t likely to teach their kids about sex at home, making it necessary for schools to teach sex ed. Whether parents want to recognize it or not, kids have sex and often start having sex in high school, sometimes even younger. Middle school is the time to introduce teens to sex so that they are informed about all of their options and are prepared to make the right decision for them.

“Whether parents want to recognize it or not, kids have sex and often start having sex in high school . . .” Parents claim that one of the worksheets teaches students how to have sex, rather than teaching them how to be safe. The worksheet in question asks students to fill in the blanks to define sex and identify four types of sex (mutual masturbation, oral sex, vaginal sex and anal sex). In reality, the worksheet does not describe in detail how one would actually perform each act and

tions of sexual relationships. Furthermore, many teens experience sexual harassment and even assault without really understanding what happened to them. It’s impossible for a person to consent to a sexual act if they don’t know that the act is indeed sex. It’s also important to have an accurate definition of sex so that teens understand what situations require protection against

photo by Mandy Callihan Middle schoolers were asked to fill out worksheets like this as part of their sexual education.

Rehabilitation system profits on vulnerable citizens

Rehabilitation centers in Oklahoma have forced detainees to work long hours with little to no actual help for their addictions. Alex Garoffolo Student Writer In a lawsuit filed Tuesday in Tulsa federal court, authorities allege that the organization Christian Alcoholics and Addicts in Recovery (CAAIR) operated a work camp program in which court-referred participants were “required to provide free labor for Simmons Foods, under constant threat of incarceration.” The participants also worked in poultry processing plants for other brand name competitors like Popeye’s Kitchen and KFC. They received no compensation, besides bologna sandwiches and housing at the facility in Jay, Oklahoma. The lawsuit is on behalf of more than 1,000 individuals who went through the program. It claims that CAAIR, which is not licensed by the state in any way as a treatment program, falsely represented that participants would receive drug and alcohol counseling and rehabilitation. Instead, the organization funneled men into poultry

processing plants, keeping all of their wages for itself. Each of the three main plaintiffs received an injury while on the job, but was forced by CAAIR to continue working. A metal door fell on one in 2014, damaging his spine. CAAIR filed for worker’s compensation on his part, pocketed the $4,500 in insurance payments, and gave him nothing, the lawsuit alleges. Now he can’t work and is in chronic pain. Another man’s hand was crushed in a conveyor belt. A doctor splinted it and told him not to work. The lawsuit says CAAIR administrators told him he got injured on purpose to avoid work, called him lazy and told him “he could either work or go to prison.” Forcing someone to work or go to jail is not the way to change a life. Rehabilitation programs have a responsibility to those who entrust them with turning their lives around.

Wholesale abuse of human rights and dignity, in the name of “teaching somebody the value of hard work” as a spokesperson of CAAIR says, is completely opposite what anybody at that point in his life deserves. Oklahoma’s understaffed and underfunded rehabilitation network deserves better than a non-licensed operator funneling vulnerable people into factory jobs to profiteer off their situation in life.

tory labor. It kept all the profits earned by the participants. The only thing promised to the participant was a $1,000 “gift” upon successful completion of the 12 month program. It remains unclear if any of the over 1,000 individuals who went into the program ever received this gift. Successful rehab programs do exist. See California’s initiative to arm inmates with coding knowledge. Or Texas’s initiative to

“Forcing someone to work or go to jail is not the way to change a life.” Those suffering from addiction clearly need help. Often times, rehabilitation centers offer services that prepare the person to enter the workforce upon completion. However, CAAIR’s only program is fac-

graphic by Madeline Woods Defendants in rehabilitation spend more time at their mandatory jobs than receiving care for their addictions.

teach recovering abusers and inmates alike business skills, so they can become contributing members of society. This is not an equation that’s hard to solve. Oklahoma could look to these other states and set up similar programs. Rehab that incorporates work makes a lot of sense. It teaches responsibility and it teaches commitment. However, when that rehab becomes dependent on working without pay, without treatment and without resources to help the person in need, it ceases to be rehabilitation and becomes for-profit abuse. Profiting off of somebody’s misfortune by offering him a leg up in life, only to rip the support out from under him, is shameful. This situation smacks of abuse of the powerless. Not only does this give Oklahoma yet another social black eye (see overfilled prisons, overworked and underfunded teachers), but it’s a black eye for the good operators in the state’s rehabilitation system. Oklahomans in need deserve, and in fact need, better.

President Clancy responds to Weinstein scandal Dear students,

Our TU Commitment speaks of life as a story that we are constantly writing – one that is shaped by the opportunities and experiences we meet along the way. Current events remind us that the stories of far too many relatives, friends and classmates include instances of sexual assault and harassment. In recent days, more than 40 women have come forward to accuse Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein of such abuse. Their bravery has inspired a wave of #MeToo posts on social media, as survivors of sexual violence share their stories. The movement has sparked important conversations with my wife, children, siblings, co-workers and friends. As this dialog unfolds, let’s recognize that each of us is blind to important facets in the life stories of others. When it comes to sexual harassment and assault, I hope we can pause, put our opinions on hold and simply listen to the accounts of those willing to share their experiences. Their stories have a lot to tell us about how pervasive assault

and harassment have become. We should use these accounts as the starting point of a new conversation about assumptions, attitudes, behavior, denial and responsibility – here on campus and beyond. As we have increased our efforts around the reporting of sexual assault at TU, there has been an overwhelmingly positive response on campus and across Tulsa. Yet, there also has been some pushback; some say this is really not a problem. In particular, I hope those with this latter opinion pause and listen to others’ stories as they come forward. As we write this chapter of our lives together – guided by our TU Commitment to acceptance, engagement, empowerment and self-discovery – remember to take care of yourself, take care of each other (which includes listening), and when you see something going wrong, step in and make the difference. Best wishes, Gerard P. Clancy, M.D. President

courtesy University of Tulsa


In-House

23 October 2017

Interpersonal Violence Resources

tucollegian@tucollegian.org

editor-in-chief

Kayleigh Thesenvitz managing editor

Michaela Flonard news editor

Trenton Gibbons sports editor

Justin Guglielmetti variety editor

Ethan Veenker commentary editor

Raven Fawcett satire editor

Adam Lux photo & graphics editor

Madeline Woods

business & advertising manager

Brian Kwiecinski

social media & web manager

Nick Rethford

distribution managers

Elise McGouran Carlie Wisely and Nathan Gibbons

The Collegian: 7

• DVIS Victim Services Advocate C*, Emory Lazenby : 918-631-2965, Hardesty Hall 3145 Resources followed by C* are confidential and have no • Counciling Center C* : 918-631-2200 mandatory reporting require• Alexander Health Center : 918-631-2241 ments. The Alexander Health Center and resources without • Office of Violence Prevention, Kelsey Hancock : the denotation can still direct 918-631-2324 you to confidential resources but are required by law to re• Campus Security : 918-631-5555 port incidents of violence at • DVIS C* : 918-743-5763 least in an anonymous statistical form for our Clery Act re• Family Safety Center C* : 918-743-5763 quirements.

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The Collegian: 8

Variety

23 October 2017

Beck tries something new, doesn’t quite work

Beck’s known for his idiosyncracy and willingness to experiment, but his latest venture may have landed him in a style that’s, frankly, beneath him. Ethan Veenker Variety Editor

Beck Hansen is an artist known for not having a “genre,” a term already so arbitrary that, from the right perspective, no artists stick to their “genre.” It’s Beck’s shtick, however, to have been termed in such a genre-defying method, and despite my general suspicion of genre to begin with, his reputation isn’t unearned. It’s true that Beck has experimented with music more than most other artists in the spotlight. He’s known best for his days of alt-rock and folk from the ‘90s and early ‘00s, a period of his in which hits such as “Loser,” “Where it’s At” and “E-Pro” made him a household name. His time with the acoustic guitar is where he’s most successful, but he’s also experimented with electronic elements on “The Information” and with Latin themes in “Guero.” Another appealing factor of Beck is that his music is truly his. He writes all his own songs and he’s an avid multi-instrumentalist: what could be called a one-man-band. It’s refreshing to see an artist signed under such a large label as Capitol Records still more-or-less in control of their own work. Beck’s experimentation and genre-hopping can be hit-or-miss, but it’s all his in the end, and that alone commands some degree of respect. It’s for reasons like this that I found “Colors,” his thirteenth studio album, to be so disappointing. To set the context surrounding this disappointment, it’s important to refer to his twelfth album, “Morning Phase.” The reader may remember the 2015 Grammys in which Beck’s “Morning Phase” won album of the year. Beyoncé’s self-titled was among the albums that it beat out, a fact that prompted Kanye West to suddenly take the stage and insist that her album should have won over Beck’s. It served as a nice callback to his similar stunt with Taylor Swift a few years prior, and really showed Beck’s patience and general good vibes. He had nothing bad to say about Kanye at the event or afterwards, in fact calling him a musical genius instead. Kanye later apologized. “Morning Phase” was perhaps the most meaningful album we’ve gotten from Beck. It called back to 2002’s “Sea Change” with its spacey folk elements, a fact that some critics applauded and others detested. Similarities aside, “Morning Phase” was an emotional ride, a folk album that captured the full breadth of what folk could do and an album that no-doubt deserved a Grammy. Written and produced entirely by Beck, the album was undeniably his and captured an overwhelmingly pained and nostalgic

sound. His first record since 2008’s “Modern Guilt,” it was one hell of a comeback. It’s understandably difficult to come back from such a success, and Beck was in no hurry to impress. He gave us a taste of what “Colors” would be shortly after the Grammys, dropping the single “Dreams.” It’s mix on the album, two years later, is slightly different, but it’s much the same song, and set the tone for the whole album. It starkly contrasts with “Morning Phase,” bringing to the table instead a hopelessly overproduced pop song, produced by Beck and pop-superstar Greg Kurstin. Kurstin is one of those miracle-producers; he’s one of those names behind a variety of award-winning artists. He’s what makes the songs tick with modern audiences, he’s the pop in the track, the kick in the beat. Kurstin is an unquestionable master at writing pop songs, and there is certainly a market for appreciating his work, but I feel as though pairing him with Beck couldn’t have been a worse idea. I can’t tell how much of “Colors” is Beck and how much is Kurstin. Whatever the ratio, I feel as though the collaboration didn’t work on either artist’s strengths. It’s important to say right-out that I don’t hate “Colors.” I do enjoy it, though I don’t find it as profound as “Morning Phase” was. I have nothing against pop music, and there is a great quantity of it that I enjoy. “Colors,” however, can at times feel overproduced and aimless. It feels at times stuck in the past, reviving sounds that made pop songs chart in the mid-2000s. One such example of a song stuck in the past is “Seventh Heaven.” It’s undeniably catchy, with a driving beat that’s easy to dance to. If I close my eyes and try, however, I can pretend with a frightening rate of success that it’s a song from Coldplay’s 2011 album “Mylo Xyloto.” The resemblance is uncanny, from the quick percussion that adds up to an overall slow beat, the mystical synthesizer in the background, the washed-up reverb on every instrument, the chorus that soars into the higher pitches of Beck’s range. Another one of the throwaway pop songs on the record is “I’m So Free,” a song that draws such an early ‘00s feel it’s laughable. The vocoder on Beck’s voice, the simple drum machine building the beat, the sudden shift into a “harder” song with the pre-chorus and the chorus. This album ends up being worth as much as its four singles were. They were all clearly chosen very carefully, because they all have elements to them that make them worth listening to. They are, in order, “Dreams,” “Wow,” “Dear Life” and “Up All Night.” Of the four, “Dreams” is the weakest. I described it earlier as overproduced pop, and that’s certainly true, but it at least seems original. The riff seems unique and the background elements don’t feel too contrived and early ‘00s. That all being said, there isn’t much here to write home about.

I’ll say that it goes on for a minute too long. “Wow” is probably the strongest of the singles, if only because it is clearly the most unique. At the time when only “Dreams” and “Wow” were released, trying to imagine what the rest of the album would sound like was impossible. It ultimately sounded more like “Dreams,” a factor that makes “Wow” that much better. “Wow” is Beck’s take on hip-hop, and a clear satire of how he perceives the meaningless lyrics present in modern music. The lines all sound aesthetically pleasing, and they all flow, but they all clearly mean nothing or next-to-nothing. Take the chorus: “Wow / It’s like right now / Wow / Oh wow, it’s like right now.” These elements make the song appreciable, but the production on the track makes it delectable. He makes great use of drum machines in capturing the hip hop spirit, and even makes his own attempt at rapping. A desolate horn-type effect in the back of the whole song gives it a vaguely Western feel, and he makes great use of vocal harmonies that fill the rest of the space in the background. It’s an incredibly simple song, but it

brass section also adds a nice texture that the rest of the album lacks. It’s no mistake, however, that the album’s best track is “Fix Me.” Why is it the best song? Is it because it sounds most like “Morning Phase?” Is it because it lacks Greg Kurstin, instead the only song on the record that’s fully-written and produced by Beck? It’s all of these. “Fix Me” is a wonderfully slow, balladic song. Simple, reverb-heavy piano complements some of the album’s only acoustic guitar. The pop elements are still present, such as the classic claps in the drum beat, and the heavy bass synthesizer that brings the background texture to the track, but it does so subtly, setting a wonderful background for Beck’s voice to soar above rather than flounder under. It’s a folk song at heart, and it’s truly beautiful. It helps me realize that Beck is still in there, trapped between a massive record label and an encroaching producer, but he’s still in there. “Colors” may have, ultimately, been a disappointment, but there’s still some experimentation going on inside. Beck’s trying

Beck’s new album is an ambitious change of sound that falls flat.

speaks to Beck’s willingness to experiment. The other two songs, “Dear Life” and “Up All Night” are also good in their own ways. The prior has great piano going for it the whole time, and the post-chorus brings in a delightfully odd and squealy guitar. “Up All Night” has a fantastic beat, built up between differently-pitched cowbells and simple clapping on every second and fourth beat. The addition of synthesized

courtesy Capitol Records

out a new sound, and I can’t fault him for it. I don’t think it fits him very well, though, and I hope he moves on from it soon. I appreciate what he’s done, and that he’s tried, but the record just didn’t pull together in the quite the right spots. I love the vision, just not the product. I still have faith in Beck, and I’ll continue to support him. I can’t wait to see where he goes next.

Brit Bennet reads from gloomy, hopeful new novel Brit Bennet, in an event hosted by Booksmart Tulsa, read from her heavy but empowering new novel. Tori Gellman Student Writer “We were girls once, as hard as that is to believe.” So begins Brit Bennett’s debut novel, “The Mothers”; a story covering topics from abortion and infidelity, to race and suicide, all within 288 pages. Booksmart Tulsa brought Brit Bennett to Central Library for an evening to discuss all this and more. Brit Bennett was born and raised in Southern California. She received her undergraduate degree in English from Stanford University before going on to pursue her M.F.A. in fiction at the University of Michigan. Bennett’s career took off after her 2014 essay, “I Don’t Know What to Do With Good White People”, was published in “Jezebel” by a classmate from Michigan who Bennett had sought advice from. Her essay had over one million views in just three short days and allowed some her other nonfiction essays to generate critical acclaim. 2016 saw the publishing of her novel “The Mothers” by Riverhead Books. Bennett began the night by thanking everyone for coming out since she was in a city where she didn’t know anybody and therefore couldn’t rely on her friends and family to show up to pad the crowd. She then proceeded to read a chapter of her book describing the two types of men in the world; “men who are and men who ain’t about shit.” The audience nodded in consensus when Bennett claimed we had all loved an “ain’t shit man”. It was fitting that the large majority of attendees were women, considering that

the novel revolved mostly around the inner workings of female relationships. The main character of the book, Nadia, is constantly being judged by the chorus of church mothers who narrate the novel and create a divide of misunderstanding between the young and old of the community. Because Nadia has recently lost her mother to suicide, the eyes of the community are often affixed on her and her typical teenage behaviors are viewed as promiscuous and uncouth since her affections land upon the pastor’s son, Luke. Nadia’s character is even further complicated by her seemingly incompatible friendship with Aubrey, a shy and studious churchgoer who lives with her sister and her sister’s girlfriend after escaping her life with her abusive father. Bennett identifies Nadia

equates this to the way he let Nadia slip out of his life when he allowed her to abort her baby by avoiding her doctor’s appointment. And after all, Luke believed that the only reason he got to have sex with Nadia was because “she wanted him to fuck the sadness out of her.” Bennett definitely acknowledged that the book was latent with sadness and a great many losses. However, she discussed some of the silver linings present in the novel in the form of love and strength. Though Nadia has her apparent setbacks and struggles, she learns to identify who she is and pursues who she wants to be without letting the people she’s grown up around influence her future. Later in life she is able to see her and her father’s relationship with more car-

“Bennett definitely acknowledged that the book was latent with sadness...” and Aubrey’s relationship as the main romance of the novel. Bennett mentioned her research process when it came to crafting some of the male characters in this novel. Though the men definitely take a back burner to the complex characteristics and intricacies of the female relationships in the book, there are certain authenticities that Bennett really illustrates when it comes to the ways characters, such as Luke and Nadia’s father, behave. Bennett explained that perception of masculinity is often based on the ability for men to make decisions. In this vain, Luke’s masculinity is further challenged beyond his physical injury from a high school football game. One of the most striking images within the novel is the fluidity of human beings and the fragile nature of relationships. In a restaurant where Luke works, Bennet is unable to hold on to the glasses he carries. He

ing and compassionate eyes, now that she is able to recognize the ways her mother’s suicide must have affected him. And despite the rift between Nadia and Aubrey some way through the book, it is still very clear that the two girls care for each other deeply and were in each other’s lives when they needed one another most. Bennett took a break from reading from the book and discussing her favorite moments of the plot to discuss some misconceptions or false inferences some readers had expressed to her upon finishing “The Mothers.” Bennett wanted to make clear that people shouldn’t view this book under a political lens or get too caught up in the factor of race. Race doesn’t necessarily drive the plot of the book forward so much as it shapes the personalities and lives of the characters. Furthermore, Bennett feels that political viewpoints require distinct ‘x or

y’ responses, and that forces her book into a mold that it really doesn’t, nor should fit into. One of her classmates from Michigan said to her that she didn’t understand Nadia’s predicament because she “never thought about a woman regretting her abortion.” We as humans are so caught up in categorizing each other even though we can never possibly know or understand the entirety of someone else’s life. The point of the book is to highlight and evoke human connection rather than to force associations or polarize opinions. Upon taking questions from the audience, Bennett described the fun she had in particular with writing the voice of the church mothers. She explains the intrinsic and external process that caused her to ask herself, “If I were 70 years older, how would I look at me?” She also discussed a chapter she had written from the perspective of Nadia’s mother beyond the grave and how although that section was removed before publication, it helped develop the sense of closeness that Nadia had had with her mother prior to the point of attack of the novel. She also explained her writing process as organic and ever-changing, though she sticks to some constants such as writing in the mornings before she has a chance to interact with the world, and working in coffee shops where she can feel people moving around her. Bennett is currently working with Kerry Washington and Warner Bros. Studios on the movie adaptation of “The Mothers,” and is living in Hollywood in order to do so. The film has an all woman team — an anomaly within the film industry. Bennett concluded the evening by once again thanking everyone for coming out and making sure that any budding writers in the audience knew how special they were and how truly rare and special it is for people to be interested in your work.


Variety

23 October 2017

The Collegian: 9

Tulsa Opera’s “Faust” an Harry Dean Stanton’s last arresting performance film a decent send-off

Tulsa Opera’s performance of “Faust” proves that opera’s not dead. Brennen Gray Student Writer Tulsa made deals with the devil this weekend, complete with drama, explosive powder and smoke. The Tulsa PAC hosted “Faust” for a night of opera October 20. Gounod, a very religious man, composed the opera in the mid-19th century. This was the period of Grand Opera in France and my first concern about the production was if the focus on spectacle typical of the time period would be too corny or over the top. It simply was not. Faust, the main character, and the devil sang through the opening song with all the dramatic gestures and dialogue of opera but with believable acting. Faust complained he wanted to relive his life but with vigor and summoned the devil for help. A small explosive flash burned a temporary hole in my retinas and introduced the devil with some pretty entertaining theatrics. The smoke curling around the stage and the dark set added a perfect touch. The opera had an interesting premise: a man makes a deal with the devil to be young again, and then falls in love with an innocent girl: Marguerite, who is unaware her lover is cursed. The relationship starts to ruin her life, much to the angst of her overprotective, war hero brother: Valentin. The story moved smoothly, although it became difficult at times to read the English subtitles above the stage to make sense of the French singing while still watching the actors.

“Faust” was my first opera, and I had never heard vocals so beautiful before. Austrian Martin Piskorski as Faust played the elderly version of his character just as well as the young version, with a booming tenor voice to accompany him. Yunpeng Wend as Valentine’s baritone was my personal favorite of the opera singers. Alyssa Martin played the prepubescent Siebel whose boyish charm served as the main comic relief in the dark opera. Amanda Woodbury played a compelling Marguerite. Önay Köse played Méphistofélés (Satan) with the charm of a gentleman and the theatrics of a professional wrestling heel. Native Frenchman Emmanuel Plassoon conducted the Tulsa Opera Orchestra from the pit. Musically, I have no critiques. The recurring motif of the opera seemed to be consequences. Each suspense filled moment when the audience pondered if the character would make a certain choice kept the opera interesting as each choice had large impacts on the plot. As Faust spirals into judgement, and Marguerite tries to keep from going down with him, the devil keeps both from realizing the truth by pretending to help them. This culminates when Marguerite sings a duet with the devil in the final act. As she tries to escape damnation, Satan offers a solution that would doom her. Opera may not be for everyone, especially those not into period pieces or subtitles, but anyone can appreciate the stunning vocals and theatrics. Some say opera is dead, or at least in its twilight, but many of those who propagate this lie have probably never been. Opera performances are a must-see in Tulsa.

“Lucky,” a reflection on death starring Harry Dean Stanton, comes to the Circle Cinema this week. Nathan Gibbons Distribution Manager “Lucky” is a good send-off to its lead actor, Harry Dean Stanton, who passed away last month and is the best part of this movie. It’s moving to see a 91-year-old actor in a movie so reflective of mortality. “Lucky” is a movie about Lucky, an old man who lives somewhere quiet and South. Everyday, it seems, he wakes up, does some yoga exercises, has a glass of milk and goes to a local diner where he solves crossword puzzles until it’s time to go to the bar. He collapses randomly one day and sees his doctor, who assures him that there is nothing wrong with his health, but reminds him that he is getting older. Lucky, who doesn’t believe in a soul, enters a ‘mood’. The movie, unlike a lot of other reflective movies or television I’ve seen, is actually very good natured. The characters are not driven by vices as dramas would often have you believe. Lucky isn’t an old cynic but is instead happy to have company. Characters often say what they mean, and look out for one another. It’s a breath of fresh air when it seems like misanthropy has become the goto for many directors. “Lucky” doesn’t totally benefit from its niceness, however. There are some corny moments throughout that drag down the

movie. A little more absurdity would have done a great deal. For example, a frequent of the bar, played by David Lynch, is torn up by the escape of his pet tortoise. Frustrated by everyone’s reactions, he eventually blows up. “There are some things bigger than people, and a tortoise is one of them.” Lynch manages to make this funny, despite everything. A little more than half of the characters’ writing works in this movie. Lynch, Stanton, Ron Livingston and James Darren all play people who seem real in their own unique way. Most of the rest, however, feel like they may be part of the scenery. “Lucky” is better than alright, right up to the penultimate scene. Its reflections on mortality and life benefited greatly from the fact that no ‘right answer’ was posed by any of the characters, who merely nodded in awe and contemplation. Two scenes away from the finish line, however, the movie’s cast very clearly discusses what they can do in the face of nonexistence. Their answer may be beautiful in its simplicity, but it’s nothing too original. Too many characters seem to wipe their brow and breathe a sigh of relief at these ‘wise words.’ The final scene says much of the same, but with much more craft. Though the end’s a little disappointing, you may still enjoy the film. Its good nature and slow pace made for an all around interesting watch, and may get you to watch a Stanton movie that isn’t Alien. The movie’s showing this week at Circle Cinema, which happens to sell $2 tickets to TU students every Tuesday.

“Super Dark Times” provides a fresh spin on coming-of-age

The recent popularity afforded to media with ‘80s aesthetics is in danger of running out of steam, but not with “Super Dark Times,” a gritty, original film. Braden Turner Student Writer Coming-of-age stories set in the ‘80s and ‘90s are everywhere these days, and the script remains the same: friends work together to overcome challenges, growing up along the way while solidifying their bonds — usually while riding bicycles. “Super Dark Times” is not one of these movies. Set in the pre-internet days of the early ’90s, it is a gripping and disturbing take on the ordinary bildungsroman of the time period. It casts aside the “charming” tropes of the genre for a much scarier, much more honest depiction of teenage life, and ultimately provides a more substantive experience. It certainly seems that director Kevin Phillips set out to frame growing up as a more Hobbesian process than anything you would see in more charming period piece counterparts. Indeed, the event that triggers the protagonists’ journeys to adulthood is not a first kiss or a new car, but an accidental and tragic death. From this moment forward, the movie spirals into a gripping nightmare of sex, violence and paranoia as best friends Zach (Owen Campbell) and Josh (Charlie Tahan) struggle to deal with the aftermath. The world they attempt to navigate is carefully constructed to evoke a sense of unease. The sky appears grey, and dead leaves litter the ground. Christmas decorations bring no joy, but rather seem to mock what used to embody the innocence of childhood. A handful of shots focusing on bare, twisting tree limbs seem to suggest that nature is no benevolent force in this film, but cruel. Nature certainly shows no mercy on the pubescent characters of “Super Dark Times.” They are violent, given to outbursts, full of sexual desire yet unable to connect to one another. Teens don’t play with nostalgic objects akin to Super 8 Cameras or Ataris in this film. Instead, they try to make out the fuzzy picture on cable pornography or flip through yearbooks to make lewd comments about their classmates. This is not only a version of the past with the nostalgia removed. It’s a version of the past the viewer would rather not remember. To be sure, the lives of these teens appear difficult even without the extraordinary circumstances of the film. Any film so tightly focused on the desperate world of a handful of teenagers relies heavily on performance, and the young actors of “Super Dark Times” deliver. Campbell forces the audience to relive their worst teenage anxieties through the character of Zach, while Tahan’s cryptic portrayal of Josh mesmerizes with quiet intensity.

Elizabeth Cappuccino’s performance of Allison, Zach’s love interest, is convincing yet underutilized, functioning mainly as an object of sexual desire for the male characters. Hardly any adults appear on-screen, and the ones who do are relegated to minor roles (with the arguable exception of Zach’s mom). The result is a claustrophobic world that belongs almost entirely to the teenagers of the film and their raw emotions. Issues of the believability of this world may arise for some viewers, and perhaps rightfully so. The film vacillates between gritty realism and the more abstract nature of expressionism. Hands break punching walls, but there are also vivid dream sequences and plot elements that feel like an exaggerated version of reality. Neither realism nor abstraction are problematic on their own, but the free mixing of the two leaves the viewer confused about the internal laws of the universe in which the film takes place. The final thirty minutes are especially polarizing for the audience, and will probably make or break the movie for most viewers. I find the shift that takes place near the end necessary to keep the plot moving and fresh; however, it’s arguable that the climax and conclusion are set up in an ineffective way. This failure to properly make the ending “surprising yet inevitable” might emerge as the film’s biggest flaw. Minor issues aside, “Super Dark Times” promises an entertaining experience for anyone who enjoys thrilling, spooky-not-

The film depicts pubescent characters realistically.

courtesy The Orchard

terrifying horror films. Bonus points for those who prefer indie movies to Hollywood blockbusters. Still, the average moviegoer and the precocious film major alike will find something to enjoy in “Super Dark Times.” The plot grabs hold and doesn’t let go, with plenty of mystery and suspense. But anyone willing to look a bit deeper will also find no lack of themes and symbols indicative of a deep and disturbing commentary on human nature and the way we relate to one another. “Super Dark Times” is screening at Circle Cinema and is available to rent or own on Amazon video.

“Lucky” fell off towards the end, but provided a meditative watch the whole way through.

courtesy IMDB

Danish String Quartet captivates Tulsa audience

The Danish String Quartet came to Tulsa and performed a pleasant mix of the classical and the postmodern, with applaudable results. Tori Gellman Student Writer

The Danish String Quartet delighted audiences last Sunday afternoon with their performance of Haydn, Beethoven and the little-known Schnittke. TU Professor Dr. Danny Arthurs gave a pre-concert lecture on how Haydn’s use of the string quartet influenced his student, Beethoven and talked through the structures of all three of the works, including the post-modernist Alfred Schnittke. The concert began with Haydn, the father of the string quartet, responsible for the now-quintessential chamber ensemble. The “Quartet in C Major” featured rosy, rich textures contrasted with light, rustic, and charming dance structures, to the audience’s delight. The first act concluded with a stunning performance of Schnittke’s “String Quartet No. 3.” Before beginning this dramatic piece, the violist, Asbjørn Nørgaard, introduced the composer’s struggles with mental illness and “seeing ghosts” (often musical greats) with the audience. The “Quartet No. 3” makes use of themes from Beethoven’s “Der Grossse Fuge” and de Lassus’ “Stabat Mater,” and the quartet kindly demonstrated what the audience should listen for before they began the piece. The work itself is full of drama, neurosis, and pain. Trills on minor seconds, furious tremolo and wailing glissandi showcased the musical talents of the Danish String Quartet while providing an insight into the troubled mind of the composer. At one surprising punctuation in the second move-

ment, the first violinist broke several bow hairs in his furor. At the conclusion of the piece, the music dies away to nothing. The audience was so spellbound by the performance that they sat in pin-drop silence for a full ten seconds before breaking into sounding applause and giving the Danish String Quartet a well-deserved standing ovation. The second half of the concert consisted of Beethoven’s “String Quartet No. 7 in F Major,” which filled the hall with Beethoven’s incredibly varied use of the colors that a string quartet can produce. The Danish String Quartet performed it with vigor and authority, to another standing ovation, this one lasting for several minutes. After leaving the stage and returning three times while the applause rolled on, they finally acquiesced and performed an encore. The encore was a traditional Danish folk tune that they had arranged for string quartet. The beautiful, hymn-like folk tune calmed the excited audience and the members of the string quartet left the stage for the final time to yet another standing ovation. It was obvious from their postures that the two hours of music they had just performed were both physically and emotionally draining, especially considering that they had performed in a private concert the night before. On Monday, the Danish String Quartet visited Edison Preparatory School in Tulsa to perform for the students there. Every year since 1954, Chamber Music Tulsa has presented the best in chamber music live to the Tulsa area. Ensembles ranging from world-renowned string quartets and piano trios to more novel chamber ensembles perform in six concerts each season. Student tickets are a mere $5 for the Sunday afternoon concerts, and if a concert isn’t sold out, TU students can often get in for free with their student ID.

“Trills on minor seconds, furious tremolo and wailing glissandi showcased the musical talents...”


In-House

The Collegian: 10

DIY Newspaper Halloween Costumes

Cowboy Get-Up

23 October 2017

Hat

Vest

Chaps

1. Open to full size 2. On one half draw an Arby’s logo shape on the paper 3. Fold paper over and cut the outline 4. Cut along centerfold 5. Set aside 6. With another full size paper, fold in half and draw a shape like half a peanut 7. Cut 8. Cut along centerfold 9. Tape Arby’s pieces to the inside of the peanut pieces 10. Attach pieces with tape 11. Hold the paper on your head to determine where to attach the paper on the bottom for best fit

1. Draw arm holes on the centerfold and cut 2. Tape the two pages together 3. Make the shoulders by folding in the top 4. Draw and cut a neck hole in the front side 5. Cut fringe into bottom

1. Hold a full page up to your leg, with the top of the paper at your belt loops and wrap around your leg toward your butt 2. Draw a curve starting two inches from your crotch down your leg and around beneath your butt 3. Cut 4. Stuff the top near your crotch into your pants around the top 5. Tape the back into the inside of your leg

Hat #6

Hat #9

Hat #10

Chaps #2

Vest #1

Vest #2

Fake News Dress

#6

Completed Hat

photos by Kayleigh Thesenvitz

#7

1. Take the cover/State Run page and keep it folded at the centerfold 2. Measure the newspaper against your torso, add another paper in a way that it folds completely around your torso 3. Use the excess as an inside seem to hold the papers together with tape 4. Shape the torso into a feminine fashion 5. Keep the outside seam open 6. Cut several half sheets and fold them accordion-style 7. Attach accordion pieces to torso section with tape 8. Write “FAKE” in big red letters to make sure they get the joke

#8

#4

photos by Kayleigh Thesenvitz


23 October 2017

Old woman feels at home in Lottie important, but it didn’t get me to where I am

Residents in Lottie Jane had more to today!” complain about this week than just Residents of Lottie have mixed reactions her portrait forever judging them. to her presence. Michaela Flonard Has never lived in Lottie Jane After Sunday Mass, Judith Williams, 72 wandered into Lottie and hasn’t left. “I came in to ask for directions, the football game made everything so confusing, but I just liked the décor so much I couldn’t convince myself to leave,” Williams explained. Lottie Jane, according to Williams, resembles her ideal front room so much she can’t bear to leave. She justified her stay saying, “All these young girls, they need someone to take care of them and keep them on the right path.” The “Jam It Up” events, she argued, were evidence of them needing her help. “These young ladies are eating nothing but PB&J’s and ramen. What happened to good food?” Williams has since taken over the night, offering tea, small sandwiches and the occasional liquor-spiked punch. Surprised Lottie RAs reported these events are more popular than the previous iterations of “Jam It Up.” Williams has taken care to make the space her own, adding collectable porcelain figurines everywhere, featuring various woodland nymphs trying to escape Pan. The antique clock has been fixed, clamoring loudly on the hour and half-hour. With this, Williams hoped the women of Lottie will “not miss any classes—beauty sleep is

Some, like Cassandra Henry, weren’t surprised by her presence. “They haven’t renovated this place since the 50’s, what did they expect?” she asked. “The boys got theirs redone, and I’m not going to say that’s anything biased, but when my grandma visited she wanted to stay here too.” Henry said John Mabee’s renovation made her wish she could check off male on application forms. Victoria Serran noted that her presence was occasionally, a good thing. “The cucumber sandwiches aren’t half bad. Gets me my daily vegetable,” she said. Others did find her presence annoying. “These couches are floral,” Isabelle O’Daniels admitted, “but they force me to sit up straight when I’m watching ‘True Crime’. How can I do that if Williams is constantly inquiring if I’ve gotten rid of my boyfriend yet?” RA Sam Carro agreed, saying Williams was a distraction and the increased socialization meant residents were actually spending time in the lobby. Williams doesn’t plan to stay forever, however. She decided that Thanksgiving break will mark the end of her “thankless task.” “This décor does make me feel at home, but sometimes, it’s too much,” she confided. “Why, my kitchen is a modernist’s dream. This makes me feel as if I’m back in the fifties, stuck listening to my shitty husband and never leaving the house. I just want these girls to do more in life.”

“Williams has since taken over the night, offering tea, small sandwiches and the occasional liquor-spiked punch”

Williams standing in front of her new house.

graphic by Madeline Woods

Student writer gets annihilated by museum social media manager in one tweet After reading an article by a student writer, a museum social media manager unleashed a fire tweet destroying a kid. Ethan Veenker Is irrelevant A local museum social media manager Phil Brooks made a valiant defense of his workplace’s honor when it was threatened by a misinformed college student’s opinion. “I’m bound by honor to defend my place of employment,” Brooks said. He wore a bandana on his head and two Japanese sai knives were holstered to his hips. A three-year old QuikTrip Big Q cup full of soda sat on the desk in front of him. The aforementioned college student’s opinion, aimed at an entirely different organization, threatened Brooks last week after he was locked inside and forced to browse the web in search of insightful opinions. “They had closed hours ago, but I was meditating with the doors shut. It was around 11 p.m. when I came across that kid’s opinion, and it shook me to my core,” Brooks explained. “It was easy, I only had to use my larger platform to publicly and passive-aggressively insult the kid’s opinion.” By use of a Tweet, Brooks linked the student’s opinion and lightly implied that it was garbage.

The State-Run Media

Professor’s joke about hungover students after Oktoberfest returns for 27th year Noted funny Professor Mark Barra, decided to not change up his classic Oktoberfest joke this year. Sam Beckmann Laughs to get extra credit KEPLINGER HALL — In an unforeseen move last Monday, mechanical engineering professor Mark Berra began his Fluid Dynamics class by making a joke about all of the fluids his students had consumed over Oktoberfest weekend. This marks the 27th consecutive year Berra has made the joke, a new personal record. “I really thought he was going to mix it up this year,” a student TA informed the State-Run. “I mean with homecoming being

on a different weekend than Oktoberfest, it was the prime time to mix it up and make up a new joke for the next 27 years. But I guess I was wrong.” According to our sources, the class’s response to the joke was a mixture of groans and hungover silences, which is typical for this joke, according to Berra. “Sometimes I get a chuckle, which is always a good day,” Berra told this newspaper. “Every five years or so I feel like I should mix it up a little, but then I realize none of the incoming students have a chance to hear this joke yet, and I think, ‘Why change?’” At press time, Berra is reportedly excited to make a joke about the rate of flow of wine after Thanksgiving. That occasion will only be the 23rd time Berra has a chance to make that particular joke, which is still “as good as new” to him.

“According to our sources, the class’s response to the joke was a mixture of groans and hungover silences...”

Sexy Halloween costumes to wear as you study alone on Halloween If you need a costume to wear as you don’t go out in public on Halloween, we has the answers for you! Sam Beckmann Gandalf the Sexy It’s Spooktober™! And what would the Month of the Pumpkin® be without a StateRun article telling you how to dress? Positively un-spooky©, that’s what. Unfortunately for you, you’re going to be spending your Halloween locked inside the haunted house that is your dorm room, fighting monsters that are actually just midterms. Never fear though, random reader! That StateRun Media is coming to your rescue with this handy list of sexy costumes that you can wear on your lonely Halloween night! I would say they’re sure to get you laid, but let’s be honest, the only things getting fondled tonight are your textbooks. Anyway, let’s get down to it! 1. Human-Sized Spider. I admit that the eight legs may slightly hinder your studying, but the benefits of this costume for outweigh the drawbacks. For example, think of the increased dexterity the extra legs provide! (It’s +2 Dex for those keeping track) You gain the ability to catch unsuspecting suitors in your web! Not to mention your skill at sucking out all of their blood for your own nourishment! And let’s be real here, who hasn’t fallen in love with a spider at least once in their life? 2. Sexy Zombie. Like a regular zombie, but you wear less clothes.

3. The Witch King of Angmar. Sure, you’ll have to spend hundreds of hours making the costume, it’s going to be ungodly hot inside that helm, and no one besides your roommate will be able to see your hard work since you’re not going out, but just think of how hot you would look! Plus, nothing says sexy like slaying the kingdoms of man. 4. Your Crush. There’s no faster way to the heart than narcissism. Your special someone won’t be able to resist making out with themselves. Unfortunately, they won’t be able to see your dedication to them as you won’t leave your dorm room, but hey — just think, they’re probably studying alone in their own dorm room, dressed as you! 5. Yourself. I thought it would be cute to build self-confidence by telling you that dressing as yourself is a sexy costume. Unfortunately, you’re not sexy, so this won’t work. But hey, it was worth a shot! 6. A 1700’s Prostitute. No one can deny that the world is more chaste than ever before. So to really get be promiscuous on this All Hallow’s Eve, you need to dress as someone from centuries long past. And feel free to go all out on it, live a little and show some ankle. 7. A Politician. They f*** everyone and don’t actually listen to other people, so it’s the perfect sexy costume for a night alone in your dorm. I recommend bringing both red and blue ties, so you can hone in on the sexiest or least controversial option, depending on what kinks you’re into. I hope this guide has inspired you to look as hot as possible while frantically cramming for your exam the next day; I know it’s my plan for Halloween night.

“ Like a regular zombie, but you wear less clothes.”

Replies to the Tweet quickly became unruly, filled with fully-grown adults who had never done anything stupid when they were in college. They made sure not to let this kid get away with it. “The best part was that I didn’t even have to contact the kid and discuss it with him in a mature, calm setting. I’m contractually obliged to knee-jerk reactions, so immediately shitting on him is actually just doing my job correctly. I don’t even think I got the kid’s name,” Brooks said, laughing. He leaned back in his office chair, legs on his desk. He reached for his drink and knocked the cup onto the floor. He pretended not to notice. “I did delete the Tweet a bit later; the damage to his honor had already been done. His reputation is ruined, his self-esteem deflated.” He ran a finger down the blade of one of his sais. “In the event that he doesn’t accept his defeat, he must meet me within thirty moons for a fight to the death.” Brooks grabbed both sais, attempting to spin one on his finger. Our reporter had to leave Brooks’s room when he began screaming obscenities and waving his sais in the air. They went to inform the director that their social media manager had deadly weapons inside the facility. “We don’t have anyone doing social media,” the director said before ushering our reporter out and locking the museum for the night.

“It was easy, I only had to use my larger platform to publicly and passive-agressively insult the kid’s opinion”

Example of the sexy zombie Halloween costume.

graphic by Madeline Woods


The State-Run Media

23 October 2017

the

State-Run media Spooky scary folio.

Local church tries to use fear to entice new believers with haunted house State-Run writer Michaela Flonard relays her experience at True Harvest Church’s infamous haunted house. Michaela Flonard Will fight you if you touch her hair True Harvest Church has held its awardwinning haunted house for the past 30 years in Tulsa, each year altering it as to stay on top of trends. This year was no different, but the theme certainly was. The haunted house is held inside a warehouse on the church’s property. It was unclear how this was used during other parts of the year; perhaps as shelter for the homeless or some other worthy cause. I, accompanied by a few friends, found myself at the end of a very long line. As with most haunted houses, a “fast pass” was sold, but as college students, we decided an hour of procrastination was significantly worth more than $15. The line took an hour. During it, various actors wandered around, trying to scare us — an abortion doctor, a stereotypical butch, presumably lesbian and a Muslim. While their jumpscares did get us once or twice, my friend ended up asking for the “lesbian”’s number, making things more awkward than terrifying. Once we finally made it to the front doors

of the haunted house, we were asked to split by gender. This led to some arguments, but we eventually were let in. Then, the real horrors began. The first room as freezing, as if we had stepped into a restaurant freezer from “The Shining”, and empty. At least we thought it was, until I saw a rat. It may have been an animatronic but then there was more so we decided to move on. The door to the next room was so cold it was only with my friend’s flannel any of us could open it. We walked straight into what we presumed was an abortion clinic, considering all the anatomically incorrect pictures of abortions and pamphlets advertising abortions at 50 weeks. A receptionist screeched out from behind a counter grabbing for our bellies and chests. Our male friends reported that in this room, they’d been chased by a crying pregnant woman and her fetus, and been thrown pamphlets on how children were a gift from God. The next room was hot, partially due to its crowded nature. Some wept, some screamed, some whispered in our ear about how we were going to hell. We mostly focused on keeping our purses close and keys in between fingers, prepped for a fight. Then came the suicide of a teen, in her room, but it happened so quickly it seemed built to sadden and trigger more than reinforce a lesson. It was also unclear why suicide was frowned on instead of focusing on

Tillerson clarifies calling Trump “dipshit,” not moron In an exclusive interview done with secretary of state Rex Tillerson, the State-Run discovers his true remarks on Donald Trump. Sam Harrell Knows The Politics It’s day 271 of the Trumptatorship, and this latest story truly gives me life. Secretary of State Rex Tillerson has been accused of calling Trump a “moron” behind closed doors. Only, according to Tillerson, that is not really the case… “Seriously? Y’all really believe I called him a moron?” We caught up with Tillerson shortly after the incident. “Wow, I’m downright befuddled. A moron is what you call somebody who drops their phone in the toilet or cuts you off in traffic. This human sweet potato is bumping uglies with Kanye West and the damn Ku Klux Klan! Y’all think I stopped at ‘moron’?” When further questioned about the event, he gave us this simple response: “Dipshit. The man is nothing but a half-wit, war-mongerin’, good-fer-nothin dipshit, and that’s what I called him.” Tillerson was clearly very upfront about the incident, seeming to lack any regret for his comments. He is known throughout the Senate as quite the “loosecannon but always gets the job done with a cold indifference because there’s no one else who can do it and is only motivated by a drive to honor those he has lost by working hard and upholding his integrity lest the tragedies of his past be in vain” type. He has achieved signatures from other countries on

very controversial proposals with nothing but strong words and a soul-piercing glean. It is even rumored that he made the previous ruler of Tunisia sign over the rights to 1,000 acres of oil fields and his resignation without ever saying a word or breaking eye contact. When considering all of Tillerson’s experience, it is really no surprise at how vocal he is with his opinions. “My damn name is Rex, were you expecting some cardigan-wearin’, frappe-drinkin’, flap-jawed iWatch douchebag? I’m a badass, not a jackwagon.” Tillerson does not seem to worry about his job much either, stating he feels it is very secure despite Trump’s initial firing spree. “That limey orange ain’t got the stones to can me. He needs me, I handle foreign affairs. As in, I make sure other countries ain’t fixin’ to bomb us every other week. Which is something they become very inclined to do whenever Donnie gets up on stage talkin’ about ‘deport Muslims’ this and ‘build a wall’ that, so it’s within his and everyone’s best interest that I stick around and try my damndest to convince these ambassadors we’re not all like him.” It is true, that while Tillerson may be a little rough around the edges, the nation needs him. He has handled all kinds of stressful and dire situations in his lifetime. From the 2003 Alaskan-Russia Settlement, to the Swiss Trade Agreement of 1987, to the 2017 Trump Administration. Therefore if there is anyone capable of holding this country together, it is Secretary of State Rex Tillerson. We all have a lot to learn from this man, starting with learning that Donald Trump is a dipshit.

Tillerson talking about how much of a dipshit Trump is.

courtesy Flickr

more shitty actions, like rape, robbery or murder. We stepped into a leather, BDSM room next, complete with a man expertly tied and in a muzzle, with a dominatrix lording over him. She cracked her whip in our direction until we left, taking longer than normal because we had to physically drag someone out of there. Other rooms weren’t as exciting. There was a loud pride festival feasting on baby parts, a fedora-festooned atheist man who leered at our Facebook profiles and basically cat-called us, a room with a thin bed of water and immobile screaming people, and finally an STI clinic. The male group reported the fedora man had been replaced by an unshaven feminist in a business suit who was a CEO; they reported being more attracted to her than actually terrified, as we were of the fedora man. Last, we met the devil. Or, at least, his voice, droning on about how what we’d seen had been sins and what he planned to do with us. His voice and the dark room made me want to sleep, so I checked Snapchat to stay awake. After we left Satan’s palace, we were confronted by well-meaning worshippers offering us the word of God. We nodded politely, told them we’d look into it and headed for our car. The technical aspects of True Harvest’s haunted house were surprisingly professional for a megachurch, but this was prob-

ably meant to entice new believers. It left me questioning why they didn’t spend this budget on something more productive, like charity. Their message was muddled and off-putting. It was unclear, for example, how being a feminist, a CEO or unshaven could land one in hell, or why we saw no instances of murders or abusers or other actual criminals going to hell—most focused on deviancy from heteronormative patriarchal norms. It seemed designed for a certain kind of Christian, and not fully in agreement with itself. In terms of horror, well ... it wasn’t all that much. Especially considering how some of the situations, like the abortion clinic or suicide, garnered stronger emotions than fear, like rage. Personally, I found the continuation of lies surrounding the topic to be aggravating for an institution built on “truth.” Allowing actors to touch you was initially scary, but eventually just became an annoyance and required self-control not to punch or kick someone. One black friend got into a screaming match with an actor for grabbing her natural hair, for instance. Combined with the long line and cost, I would only recommend this to those who are conservative Christians, and definitely not to anyone with a history of suicidal thoughts, abortions, LGBT+ or who doesn’t hate those groups.

Picture of the student’s dorm full of garbage and dirty clothes.

graphic by Madeline Woods

“I’ll clean when midterms are over” says student living in four feet of filth A TU student accidently let a huge amount of trash build up in her apartment due to midterms. Sara Serrano Should really be studying If you pay close attention to your nose on a windy day, you can smell a very distinct rotting smell traversing the campus. It’s very faint but just distracting enough that people are starting to take notice. If you’re methodical enough or enlist the help of a doggo, you can trace the scent back to its source, which is exactly what I, investigative journalist extraordinaire, did. Who I found at the end of that awful, putrid stench wishes to remain anonymous (mostly because they don’t want an angry phone call from their mother), but they have agreed to tell their story. “It all started with my physics midterm,” the student related. “I really didn’t have any time to do laundry that week because I was hitting the books hard. I thought it was fine; I could do it later.” In retrospect, the student seriously regrets this decision. “But then that next week I had a Diff EQ exam, so it kept piling up. The basket started overflowing, but there was nothing I could do! I had to study.”

It wasn’t just their laundry that started to spill over. “I couldn’t even take the trash out. First it was just trash bags scattered everywhere, but then I ran out of bags, so now it’s just garbage.” You get the point. The student has neglected to clean for three weeks now and the results are horrifying. The door hardly opens. The beds now float precariously on a sea of filth, an unholy mix of dirty underwear, cereal bars, study guides and Monster energy cans. Layers have compacted and developed fault lines. Microearthquakes are now a real concern. “My roommate is really passive-aggressive, so they built a depth meter for our room. We’re at about four feet now.” The student’s roommate refused to tell their side of the story but has commented that if the trash piles up past six feet: “I’m going to burn it all.” Despite all this, the student doesn’t seem to understand the urgency of their situation. “I get that I really need to clean, but at this point there’s so much that it would take days! That time is too precious to spend on that. I’ll clean when midterms are over.” It is my dearest hope that the student is still alive after midterms, that they have not been absorbed and assimilated into their filth.


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