DU Players Freshers Vol VI, Issue I

The Player Vol VI, Issue I

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Welcome to this wonderful publication, this wonderful society, and this wonderful university!

Welcome to the next stage of your life and boy(!) it’s going to be awesome. If you’re reading this then you have just received an info pack about the vibrant society life in Trinity College or you’ve stumbled across it among the overwhelming deluge of materials at the Freshers Fair.

I would encourage you to take heed of this magazine in particular because you may find the passion that will keep you going through the ups and downs of college life.

Heya, From the Chair,

From writing to acting, directing to design, technical theatre to producing, all aspects of theatre life are to be found in the walls of Players Theatre, our very own student-run space located at the heart of Trinity campus. As well as all of this ace craic, perhaps you will enjoy our themed Wednesday night events, where we can sing, dance and make merry! And if nothing else, our Front of House provides delightful environs in which to sit back with a cuppa and relax.

This week, as the name would suggest, is primarily devoted to incoming Freshers. However, it is also a time to welcome international students, returning members and ReFreshers - returning students who may not have been involved in the society before. To all I say a hearty hello! Please, please come along and give the society a good run for its money. Some of you will get involved in PIPs, our introductory programme, or will act in a Freshers’ Fest show and hopefully you will get swept up in our wonderful world. Others might not find it so easy, starting college is an alarming time of novelty and change. My own first year was no easy ride and I didn’t get involved in Players until second year so I know how it feels to play catch up!

If you need a hand getting your feet off the ground or just want to chat about how to get stuck in, please say hey!

Alright folks, there’s nothing more for me to say except dive in! You are about to have so much fun. Embarking on my final year of college I must confess I am very jealous. Although I am looking forward to making loads of new pals! Yay!

lx e a h c i M

See you on the d-flo,

Hello, hello, and hello! Welcome to this edition of The Player, our bi-termly publication for this great society conveniently called DU Players. The ‘S’ is important because this society would be nothing without you, the players, and by this I don’t mean actors or writers or those on Tinder, I mean anyone willing to just play.

We have so much going on this year from great shows that’ll get your mind thinking to great events that’ll get your booty shaking, and everything in between. We have something for everyone in this society; did I mention we are the intersociety football champions? Go Tigers!

So if you’re reading this at home, in front square or even in our lovely front of house (how shiny is that floor though?), come audition, come join PIP’s or come along to our events. If you’ve been here before, welcome back, tell all those who look confused what I’m rambling about! Most importantly for everyone, come and play.

Brian

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Contents

Get involved Meet the Committee Highlights 14/15 Freshers Fest Shows Audition timetable Freshers Week Timetable Alumni and Guests Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright Someone Old, Somone New Someone Borrowed, Someone Blue

And Heya, From the Editor,

The Team Editor Deputy Editor Design Cover Artwork

Brian McMahon Gallagher Amelia McConville BMG & Dara Ó Cairbre Jimmy Kavanagh

Contributors: Ronan Carey, Sam Ford, Aoife Leonard, Ellen Gorman, Ursula McGinn, Katie Nicholas, Matt Armitage, Ellie Hendry, The Tiger, Gary Jermyn, Robbie Doyle, Maggie Crane, Emer Heatley.

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Get Involved!

Acting Ronan Carey

“So You Want to Be an Actor?” was the title of a slim, lime-green paperback my grandmother handed me on Christmas morning 2008. Clearly she saw something beyond the poor attendance and lukewarm reviews of my stage school’s ‘end of year’ showcase (Ferris Bueller’s Day Off: The Musical) and thought it appropriate to encourage me to pursue acting, which for all intents and purposes had been my primary talent and joy for the previous thirteen years. It therefore came as a shock to my family back in 2012 when it was revealed that I had chosen to study Ancient and Medieval History and Culture at University instead of Acting or Theatre Studies. And yet here it is that three years later acting continues to be my primary talent, joy and distraction from my degree. Inevitably this is all entirely thanks to the society you have hopefully just joined, re-joined or are about to join: Players. If you’ve never acted before, now is the time to see if it’s actually any use (surely all the Baldwins can’t be wrong?). Even if you feel like you’re some big swinging stage cock who doesn’t need our pity, now is the time to try things out in a safe environment where you can’t really fail (but maybe lose the attitude, huh?). Ultimately, the biggest piece of advice I can give to any fresher who wants to act would be to just give it socks and audition for everything, there’s no other way around it. I wasn’t in the all-consuming behemoth of Co-Op, nor was I in a fresher’s show of any kind so it actually took me a while to find my feet. However once you find them; be warned it can be difficult to get them to leave the building.

There is nothing quite like the feeling of staging an original production. There is something electric in the atmosphere of a rehearsal space when everyone involved in the project knows that they are working to create something totally new, unique, and original. As a playwright or deviser, you set this process in motion. You lay down the framework upon which everyone else, from actors, to directors, to set, lights, and costume designers can begin to build. So trust your instincts and recognise that that’s all you need to provide - a framework.

If there is a topic that interests you, start writing. Throw down words on a page.

Challenge yourself to write non-stop in short bursts without pausing to think about where the story is going. Or, if it suits you better, simply lay out a plan for the piece without writing any dialogue - you can always workshop those elements later with actors through improvisation exercises. Utilise all of the opportunities available to you here at DU Players. Get involved in the Players Introductory Programme (PIPs) and the Rehearsed Readings, and be sure to speak to people who have been involved in staging their own work before. Build a team that you have confidence in. Reach out to people whose work you have seen and liked, or people that you know you work well with, and be sure to ask their advice. If you are directing your own work, be sure to ask for the opinions of other people on your team - you don’t have to agree with them! In fact, the process of deciding which criticisms to accept, and which to refuse, will help to reinforce your vision. And finally, remember that this is a learning process!

Players is all about trial and error, so be sure to take note of all your successes and failures along the way and never stop learning!

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Playwriting /Devising Aoife Leonard

The first step is picking a play that interests you or gets you fired up in some way - it could be an old classic or something straight from the Edinburgh Festival... or you might have written it yourself! Read it thoroughly and think about how you’d like to stage it. Or, if you want to try something a little different, you could also DEVISE a show around a particular idea or concept. By the way, if it’s your first time, it’s often a good idea to team with another to make a duo - co-directing has a long and proud tradition in DU Players. The second step is starting to approach people to put on your submission. You’ll need to have a chat with potential Producers and Designers. If you don’t know people to fill these roles, have a chat with the Productions Officer (productions@duplayers.com) and they’ll provide you with a list of people interested in Set, Sound, Lighting, Producing, etc. Then go off and write your submission. Providing you get the go-ahead, you should gather your cast and get all their timetables. This way you can figure out your rehearsal schedule. It’s good to have a rough idea of what you want to get done from day to day. Practice makes perfect! Set a deadline for your cast to be off book... The sooner the better.

As crunch time approaches, you’ll need to source your props and liaise with your Design Team. You’ll have to keep in contact with the Producers who will be providing you with the dollah ca$h to finance your masterpiece. Get as many runs in as you can and give your actors notes on how they can improve their performance.

Opening night will be upon you before you know it. Don’t worry if Monday is an unmitigated disaster... Monday is ALWAYS an unmitigated disaster! It’s a learning curve and most shows improve as the time goes on. This is also true of most directors! If you have any questions, seek out some elder lemon for advice - it will make them feel wise and relevant and they will probably give you decent advice. Most importantly... Have fun!

Lighting Design Ellen Gorman

Directing Sam Ford

Ever wondered what that thing is that you switch on so you can see things when the sun goes to bed? It’s called LIGHT, and it’s actually super important in theatre as well as day to day life. Lighting can often be overlooked when thinking about the aesthetic elements of theatre, but when used well it becomes a keydesign aspect of any production. Players Theatre is (in my opinion) a brilliant place to learn about lighting. Sure, it’s a small space with a relatively small lighting stock, but you will very quickly discover that such limitations motivate you to be creative and practical in figuring out the best way to bring your vision to life. More importantly, Players is filled with friendly, disgustingly gorgeous people ready to share their passion and experience with others. Like so many aspects of theatre, the best way to learn more about lighting design is to get out there and get yourself involved in a show or two.In a setting like Players, it can be really worthwhile to work as a lighting assistant for a more experienced designer. You pick up a lot of new information, as well as new skills, just by helping out and asking questions. I would also highly recommend joiningthe PIPs lighting design course to learn the basics of working with lighting equipment and start developing your own creative process.

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Costume in Players, for those who have not been involved in it, may seem like a mysterious aspect of the society. Costumes are magically created, many are hauled up from that most perplexing and mysterious place of all... the basement. The third floor in Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone, the west wing in Beauty and the Beast and the basement in Players: all locations which for many seem off limits. But like the west wing and the third floor, the basement needs to be investigated. It gives DU Players an amazing resource which many other drama societies lack.

This year, the items in the basement will be logged in a digitalised archive making it even easier to find and access the right costumes for productions. Really the business of costume is a pretty simple one to get involved in. If you are nervous of taking the plunge into costume design, ask to help people on productions. No one in their right mind is going to say no to help. That way you can learn the ropes without being solely responsible for ensembles. In addition to this the PIPs course on costume is extremely useful. Having taken it last year, it gave me a good understanding of how to go about designing costumes and helped me to become more involved in that side of Players.

Costume Design Katie Nicholas

It would be fab to get some new people involved in costumes! If anyone is interested in costume management, the sub-basement team and I always need extra help to coordinate the basement. So please email me if interested (basement@duplayers.com).

Therefore costume is really easy to get into and it would be a shame not to make the most of the facilities we have at players even if you are only slightly interested in costume design. It’s a creative and rewarding thing to try and so simple to get involved in.

In Players, set designers are few and far between, so directors are always hungry for new people willing to join their production teams. The best way to get involved in set design is to plunge straight in and sign up for the PIPs course and/or start helping out at weekend get-in’s (starting in week 3). At a get-in, all the design elements of a show come together in the theatre to create the shows visual elements. This is why it is important that set, lighting and costume collaborate together.

Set Design Ursula McGinn

At an average get-in, each show has approximately 7 hours to get everything done, therefore time management is key! Normally a set designer will have approximately 2 ½ hours allocated for set get in, where all the set dressing that has been collected over the previous weeks get to be put in place on the stage. As far as set dressing goes, Tiger is the best invention since Ikea. Euro shops and second hand stores are also a good shout and spray paint will become your best and most reliable friend. You can also find some hidden gems in the Players basement, and if you ask very nicely, the Beckett staff may allow you to borrow things from their ever-growing basement.

Try and be as prepared as possible, as leaving things until the last minute ends up in your producer running around Dublin like a headless chicken on a Sunday afternoon searching for an open hardware store (not so fun fact: sometimes we’ve had to go as far as Rathmines). Also each show only has access to the theatre an hour before their show, so it is essential that a set can be put up in less than 45 minutes. It’s good to challenge yourself, but don’t get too ambitious; be open to suggestions and advice, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. Or alternatively, good luck trying to build your co-op style set in 3 hours!

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Entertainment Matt Armitage

Ents, or more commonly known by the hip and trendy as the “Entertainments Officer” has that all important role of organising and ensuring you have the most craic possible in your time at Players. Whether you see yourself burning serious rubber on the disco floor or testing your wits in an “all or nothing” game show, we have something for you.

Players do parties best. Fact. Why? Well we have a whole fancy building to ourselves with high-tech lights, a sweet ass speaker system and a bar alongside fully working doors and chairs! It’s safe to say we can do anything and everything! They also do this kinda drama thing as well.

Which is cool...

This Freshers week will be ENTS CENTRAL. If you have just joined college then it is a perfect way to meet your fellow Freshers. You also get to meet those war torn veterans who can share their wise words about college life and the party that comes with it. Unfortunately when the dust settles, the official ‘Freshers Week’ has to end (why can’t we have a Freshers month!?). But fear not! Every single Wednesday of the college calendar, we do solemnly swear to hold an event ready to rock your socks off and we will even throw in free refreshments and certified fun as part of the package. If this wasn’t enough, later in the year we have the Infamous Players Ball and the Mystery Tour... but for now. I say no more...

If you want to be involved with the events we have here the best way is... go to them! Put your dancing shoes on and join the party! So come on down and join me, my amazing shents team and the rest of us here at DU Players to come and play. As the legend-party-animal Robbie Williams once said: “let me, entertain you.”

Do you know what Google Drive is? Do you know how to make an effective Doodle? Can you tell the difference between Google and Doodle? If you answered yes, then chances are you are already a wonderful, competent, in demand stage manager. Congratulations. If you answered no, don’t worry, there’s hope for you yet.

Stage managing can be a punishing, exhausting, all consuming job. You’re the first one in and the last one out, you’re in charge of getting (sometimes difficult) actors to turn up, preferably on time, to your painstakingly planned rehearsal schedule, where you sit and make your dutifully detailed rehearsal reports. And you’re in charge of keeping the director sane. No mean feat. But, if that’s your thing, (as it unfortunately is mine) then welcome to the club.

Stage Managing Ellie Hendry

I’ve heard it said that a good stage manager is worth their weight in gold. It’s true. And the best way to get inducted into this glittering, gold plated profession is to ASM (that’s assistant stage manager for those of you looking to learn the lingo). Just ask any shiny stage manager you can find and they will be more than happy to help show you the ropes. In this economy we could use the extra gold.

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Meet The Committee Michael Stone // Chair Then rose the royal chief of the Players of Ireland, and put on his battle-dress of combat and contest. And his stout-shafted spears were placed over against the king, and he put his gold-hafted sword in readiness on his left, and he grasped his broad-blue, Norse lance, and upon the arched expanse of his back he placed his emerald-tinted shield with flowery designs and with variegated, beautiful bosses of pale gold; and to protect the hero’s head in battle he seized his crested, plated, four-edged helmet of beautiful, refined gold with bright, magnificent, crystal gems and with flashing, full beautiful, precious stones which had been set in it by the hands of master-smiths and great artists. The warrior-chieftain strode then from the great hall of Tara, seat of the High Kings of Éiru, through forest and field of Ireland he rode until he came upon the house of Stone. For here he knew he would find what riches and glory could not provide, the comfort and pleasance of a humble and gracious host, Michael of Stone; gentleness and kindness are his sword and shield and benevolence his helm.

Maeve Walsh // Treasurer Ever since Maeve Walsh sold her placenta to Kourtney Kardashian at birth, she has had a head for business. That’s why she makes the perfect Treasurer: she will do anything - anything(!) - to save the dosh for Players. When an Ethiopian Prince asks you for $50,000 to secure your $1,000,000 inheritance, that’s Maeve Walsh. Cheap fuel as part of a cross-border diesel laundering operation? You can be sure Maeve is behind it. Hats, scarves or headbands with your favourite team’s colours?

No, they’re no independent vendors, they’re part of Maeve’s nationwide network of wheeling, dealing and - from time to time - stealing. You may think that being at the top of one of Ireland’s biggest organised crime operations would make Maeve a cruel, hardened kingpin but she’s surprisingly nice and approachable. Say hey and she’ll respond. Just get out of there before she enlists you in her latest hustle!

Benedict Esdale // Venue Tech Oh hey! Didn’t see you there, I was too busy playing guitar in Front of House!

My name is Benedict Esdale, your venue technician for the upcoming year. When I am not screwing knots and bolts or shooting birds on my landed gentry estate, I like to sit back and make twibbons.

Yeah you heard me, a twibbon. #twibbon.

I find in cases when you are ill-prepared or have no idea what to do, it’s best to make a twibbon. The secret to my twibbon making is to make them super discreet, not flashy – who wants to be tacky? – so that the general populus have no idea what they stand for. I also pride myself on being extremely unfashionable and only sport an array of rank tracksuit bottoms. I got off to a running start here, after spending 3 hours in the building I announced myself to be in the running for Chair. I mean if you want it why not make your intentions clear? #twibbon. I’m going to be such ‘craic’ on committee and I can assure you that Paolo Nu.. or damn! Players is my main priority!

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Molly Jermyn // Secretary Do you know Bono? Molly Jermyn doesn’t. She is more commonly known as ‘MJ’ but there are opposing theories to how she got that name. Some say it stands for Michael Jackson because of the fresh garms she wears on the catwalk at the Paris Fashion Week. Others say it stands for ‘Mary Jane’ which refers to her upbringing in the Rastafarian district of Sandycove. Or maybe it is because they are the initials to her own name. However, no one really knows the truth. And no one can find out the truth because no one will ask her. Why? Because she is a Pokemon. When you are wandering through the wild jungle of Trinity College you may find a species like Molly known as a Jynx. As we all know, this breed is Ice/Psychic. And any question about her name may lead to her using her most effective attack, ‘Lovely Kiss’ which puts her enemies into a deadly sleep. The Jynx has a language with several cry patterns that sound similar to human speech.

However, this language has yet to be deciphered. It prefers to communicate by using dance-like movements. These rhythmic movements often cause people to dance along with it. Molly Jermyn: a fascinating and alluring species.

Molly McAvoy // Tech Manager Illegitimate daughter of Dara Hoban and Deirdre Van Wolviler, Molly “big dog” McAvoy brings a notable amount of street cred’ to the DU Players family.

When she’s not working on her Destiny’s Child tribute act, Bootyliscious NI, she can be found either drag racing in her pimped out Volkswagen Beetle or having business meetings/romantic getaways with her good friend, and well known handful in the bedroom, Jerry from buildings. Living up to her title of “Big Dog”, Molly has her trusty pack of Bitches known as the Tech Team to fill your life with more tech than you know what to do with. Think of Molly as the “SeaWorld” of DU Players, she brings a magical and welcoming atmosphere to the building, but will tear your head off to keep you in line.

Matt Armitage // Ents Matt Armitage, Single, 20, 6”4. Voted Most Likely To Steal Your Girl. Didn’t have much luck on tinder so decided to try the Player. Have been known as a bit of a sesh hound and a bit of an absolute legend. Outdoorsy in the sense that I like to get drunk on patios. Have been told I have an iconic laugh and a wonderful personality but not going to brag about that. I love dancing in FOH to Destiny’s Child Remixes. My debut album ‘Launchpad in Lombard’ will be coming out later this year. Kanye is a personal friend.

The nightlife in Dublin was nothing before I arrived. Looking for someone who can keep up with my fast-paced partying lifestyle.

My new position as the ents officer of Players Theatre has been so fulfilling and I feel I am finally doing something good with my life by providing first class events to the underprivileged and dull students of Trinity. Organising Players Ball today, designing the Coachella headliners tomorrow. Hit me up at ents@duplayers.com if you wanna piece of this. xo

DU Players 2015//16 Katie Nicholas // Basement On the surface, Londoner and History student Katie Nicholas seems like the kind of gal who loves nothing more than cuddling up in her onesie with a cup of tea and a Hugh Grant film. But librarian-esque demeanours can be deceiving.

Lauded for creating a friendly and inclusive environment in Players with her creation of the Sub-Basement team, Katie’s manifesto for the year includes creating an online database, converting the basement into an underground Grime club called “The Bassment,” and continuing the expansion of the Players blow up doll collection (which will all have a pair of dungarees hand-stitched by Katie). Credited with writing recent number one hit “Bitch Better Have My Money,” it’s clear that Katie has talent and street smarts, as well as both bitches and money.

Brian McMahon Gallagher // Publicity Brian Mcmahon McGallagher McMahonGallagher McGallagherMcMahon O’Brian McGoulligag McPublicityOfficer McEditor McPlayer McGraceNuttalLegacy McSubmissionsPosters McMaybeDon’tLetBrianDesignThePosters McPhotoshop McNoDeliveryCharges McFlyers McTshirts McLanyards McTrifolds McBanners McLikeAndShare McTwibbon McDublin McDooblin McPalmerstown McDrama McThirdYear McActor McSpokenWord McBrianMcMahonGallagher McCheckOutHisFacebookPage McOutStraight McShamelssSelfPromotion McBoojum McIsRiceAVegetable? McBeverages McWrestling McLiverpoolFC McOffensiveJokes McWhipped McTopKnot McThankGodHeGotAHairCut McHairSlick McOddSocks McStatementSocks McMuppets McGreenTea McLeaveTheTeabagIn McChicken McTurkey McSneakMassages McSneakTickles McWhat’sThat McFeckOffBrian O’BrianFallon Gallagher

Charli Mathews // Front of House Introducing Charli, our Longford-born, half-Ukrainian half-Australian Front of House Manager. Thus follows some stimulating information on Cahrli: The role of FOH Manager includes captaining the DU Players Design Team (DPDT), a role that Crhali fits naturally into. The skills she has picked up as a designer in Players combined with her people skills helped her guide the DPDT to winning the Na- tional Student Design Olympiad (NSDO) in Beijing in 2014. Chrali has an impressive design track record. Her career as a designer began when she was commissioned to redesign the entire landscape of Nigeria in 2005 as part of a Nige- rian Governmental Authority on Landscape Development (NGALD) initiative. Following that, she was picked up as the set designer for the Cillit Bang advert. As well as having an impressive design portfolio, Chrlai is a real people person, as opposed to a goat person or a lemur person. When you walk into FOH this year and feel like a person and not an animal, you’ll know it’s the work of Clhari!

Paul Miller // Productions Paul Miller, P-Millz: the man, the myth, the legend. Paul first started life as a fresh-faced young poon-hunter on the mean streets of Newbridge. It was there that he first developed his trademark hair flick to attract the ladies of the town. From Kildare he moved on to join a big group of players like himself in the Big Shmoke, and it was here that he combined the hair flick with ‘dat pout’ to become the loveable rogue he is today. Paul is also very dedicated to his subjects of English and Drama. As he once famously said of Trinity students “If you don’t have a framed photo of Samuel Beckett then what are you even doing here?” - fair point, Paul. On top of these old passions, Paul discovered many new loves at college: Cubania, Jules Lom and of course TECH! This last love grew so deep and strong that Paul has taken to saying ‘TECH!’ loudly with feeling in conversations, even when it doesn’t fit with the context. But the college journey has not ended for our local lothario. There’s no telling what this most Adamest of Ants will do next!

Brian Fallon // Festivals When Brian Fallon first arrived in Ireland in 1947, he had nothing but a half bag of spice and some fading memories of his native Namibia. He was truly penniless, with no helmet, no boots and no job. Luckily for all, he soon found his calling as an academic in Trinity College Dublin where he is currently in his final year as an undergraduate in LaunchPad Studies. A source close to Brian says he has described his scholarly pursuits as “UNREAL, MAN!”. Brian loves nothing more than a good festival (apart from running one that is!!!!) He prides himself in his recent innovations on the Irish festival scene, namely, TinderFest, StyrofoamCupOfCoffeeFest, 4locoFest, and, of course, ButterMayoFest. We’re all excited to see what the next year brings for Brian, but we’re positive it will be spicy!!

Ellie Hendry // House Manager In 1314, on the eve of the Battle of Bannockburn, in a desperate effort to conceive an heir worthy of his clan, William Angus Hendry-McCloud, armed with nothing but one of Ewan McGregor’s discarded heroin needles and enough Buckfast to fill Loch Rannoch, artificially inseminated a scotch egg with a diamond. The result was none other than the near legendary figure of Ellie “The Bruce” Hendry. Ms Hendry first rose to prominence as the house manager for the Globe during the premiere performance of Macbeth, which resulted in her banishment from the British Isles once it was discovered that her Google Doc rehearsal schedule was actually a carefully organised plan to invade Northumberland. Now Ellie mourns the foreign hands that grasp her country with a tartan of jet black, which she can never remove until she returns to her nation and places the rightful ruler, Queen Nicola I, upon the Stone of Scone.

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Highlights 2014//15

Re:Joyce Festival This year DU Players of Trinity College presented a brand new festival to celebrate the work of UCD’s most famous graduate. Go figure. The Re:Joyce festival was set up to celebrate not only the work of James Joyce but also Joyce’s biggest influence; Dublin City. Re:Joyce fest kicked off with a launch party in the famous “House of the Dead” on Dublin’s quays. Hanging around in a house which inspired the work of the man himself was topped off with the musical accompaniment of the ladies from “The Songs of Joyce” and a drink with the owner of the house. During the week we had a series of guests including former Joyce lecturer and general top bloke David Norris. The week saw the debut performance of a custom made headline show, the award winning “Wandering Rocks” (pictured right), directed by Michael Stone and Sam Ford. The show was devised by the directors and cast around a six week period after walking tours of Dublin and embodied the true collaborative atmosphere of DU Players as well as the real life stories of Dublin City. The festival ended on a high note as the show represented Players in the Irish Student Drama Association Festival, showing the rest of the country’s drama societies a little piece of what Dublin is all about.

ISDA FESTIVAL Speaking of the ISDA Festival, Players was honoured to host the festival this year in Trinity.

The festival was held over four separate venues, the Samuel Beckett theatre, the Lir Academy Studios 1 and 2 and, of course, our own Players Theatre. UCD, NUIG, UCC, Maynooth University, Queens University, DIT and Mater Dei all came along to showcase the best Student Drama that Ireland has to offer, and boy, did they deliver. We had Beckett, we had Enda Walsh, we had old classics and we had some fantastic new work. Players was represented by three exceptional shows that brought us to three very different places. Wandering Rocks took us on a wander along the Liffey, God of Carnage brought us into the living room of two families with questionable priorities, and East transformed the Samuel Beckett theatre into the “Slippery People” bar, with its residents living up to the name. The festival culminated in the ISDA Ball in the Sugar Club where we all danced and were merry until the wee hours and the prospect of doing it all again next year was heart warming. Hosting was fun, but I think we’ll give someone else a go next year. Did somebody say road trip?

24 hour musical Here’s a real treat for ya! Fancy a challenge? Try taking on the task of casting, rehearsing and performing a musical in 24 hours! (not performing a 24 hour long play btw) The best thing about it is, everybody gets a part! In 2012, The Muppets Christmas Carol was put to the 24 Hour test, in 2013 A Nightmare Before Christmas - there were tears, there was laughter.

Last year, the directors took on a less traditional musical but no less well loved. There’s no way you can stop (that’s right) The School of Roooock, yeah! With six different people taking on the coveted role of Dewey Finn / Jack Black, this should have been a sprawling mess but it was in fact a real treat. This was in many ways down to the help of the audience because for the first time ever, Players hosted a KARAOKE musical. Whether you’re in the cast or in the crowd, 24 Hour Musical is the bees knees. Oh, did I mention it’s also for a good cause? How can you go wrong? Coming in the second half of Michaelmas term.

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MYTHFEST

In a festival heavy year, we of course had our annual summer festival, MythFest: a Festival of Irish and International Mythology. Hooray! Returning with a bang, we had a week of short outdoor performances, night time events and an amazing headline show, The Unquiet Hour: A Tale of Faeries, taking place in an purpose built outdoor theatre. The show was based on the poetry of WB Yeats had fantastic audiences and enjoyed a fantastic week long run. Tánaiste Joan Burton and Provost Patrick Prendergast were in attendance for the launch of the festival and a showing of The Unquiet Hour. During the week we had some fantastic events, we had brilliant spoken word, music and comedy as part of MythCavern and even managed to have a Céili in Front Square. Yes, we had a traditional Irish Céili on the cobbles. Each of the eight shows performed were completely original work: we had pirates, Greeks, bulls, astronauts, stars, faeries, shadow puppets and Irish speakers. We can all look forward to our Summer Festival this year, and if MythFest 2.0 was anything to go by, it’s going to be a tonne of fun!

FRESHERS’ FEST Ah, Freshers Fest, what a time to be alive! This festival takes place for the first six weeks of term and celebrates the talents of all the new blood who join the ranks of the society. In 2014, Freshers Fest saw some delightful and exciting productions grace the Players stage. I Have A Secret, Best Friend was a brave piece of new theatre, The Beatles Show a charming exploration of Beatles fandom, Droplet a hilarious look at a college bathroom , Law and Order: Witness for the Prosecution a modern twist on an Agatha Christie classic, Bert a renewed interpretation of the tale of Mary Poppins, Phonogram a graphic novel inspired epic that used the entire Players building, and The Freshers Coop a swashbuckling adventure through time and space. Yes, that’s right, a real mixed bag. This year promises to be just as riveting and fun. Alongside the Freshers Fest productions are PIPs, a series of introductory classes, which culminate in an impressive showcase. There’s no better time of year for new and returning members to throw themselves into the world of theatre and pursuits that they’ve never tried before. Take a deep breath and dive in!

EVENTS & ENTERTAINMENT Players is often hard work, rehearsing and preparing the stage for a production are not mean feats. So sometimes we like to let our hair down. Every Wednesday night, the society hosts its renowned themed events where you can grab some refreshments and mingle with pals old and new. This kicks off in Freshers Week with the Trinity Ents night - last year saw the recreation of Y2K in the Button Factory with signature groovy tunes and funky design. As the year goes on, everything from nights of spoken word and music to film screenings and punky reggae parties can be expected to hit the floor. On occasion, we bring the party elsewhere in Dublin.

Last year our Mystery Tour Time Machine hit up a BOAT and a ROLLER DISCO, the funnest of times! The highlight of the Players event calendar, however, is Players Ball. On this night, we install ourselves in a venue in the city and showcase the best design the society has to offer, as well as some great music and food to be found in Dublin. In 2015 Nialler 9 and Kormac hit the decks in District 8, which was transformed into an Urban Jungle for the occasion!

11

FRESHERS FEST School is back in session. Grab your Little Brown Bag, your Pink water bottle and hold on to your hair bun because things are about to get catty. SCHOOLGATE CATWALK tells the true story of the false lives of the South Dublin elite. Pauline Bannon-Hume has a German kitchen, a car fit for a drug lord and an address free of the word “Bally.” In other words, a model life.

The only thing lacking - everyone else. Armed with fresh pesto, Newbridge Silverware and an accent that would make Ross O’Carroll Kelly blush, she sets out to improve the world - one housewife at a time. The mission; dress the mothers of private school children for the schoolgates. The team; her three best friends from a thinly disguised southside school. The problem; TK Maxx. All the world’s a catwalk - so strut it.

GIRLS LIKE THAT

SCHOOLGATE

CATWALK dir. Grace Morgan

dir. Aibhlín Ryan & Ellen Gorman

Heat magazine says that Kim Kardashian has cellulite on the back of her thighs and Kanye is having an affair. Rihanna has lost a stone and is making Drake really jealous. Taylor Swift is looking unhealthily skinny and Calvin is seriously worried about her.

Cosmo says that Harry, Liam and Niall are all looking for a really easygoing girl that doesn’t take herself too seriously.

Fuck.Marry.Kill. Harry, Liam, Niall.

There’s a scandal in school and the girls are not happy. A photo has been sent around. A picture of Scarlett. Naked. From playschool to graduation, Girls Like That explores the outside pressures, from media to parents, affecting how young girls judge themselves and each other.

Sugar, spice and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonim accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction -- Chemical X. Thus, The Powerful Girld were born. Using their ultra-super powers Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime and the forces of evil.

12

Powerpuff Girls dir. Ellie Hendry & Molly O’Cathain

It’s Sheffield, in the 1980’s. An unruly class of gifted and charming group of teenage boys are taught by two eccentric and innovative teachers, as their headmasters pushes for them all to get accepted into Oxford or Cambridge. Hector, an eccentric teacher, delights in knowledge for its own sake, but the headmaster ambitiously wants the school to move up the academic league table; Irwin, a supply teacher, is hired to introduce a rather more cynical and ruthless style of teaching.

In this mix of intellectualism and creative spirit that guides a rigorous preperation regime for that ultimate brass ring, the lives of the randy students and the ostensibly restrained faculty intertwine that would change their lives forever.

FRESH dir. Ursula McGinn

The Secret Garden

History Boys dir. Catriona Moloney and Sile Maguire

Each year over 2000 People walk through Trinity’s front gates for the first time as students. Every year is the same, but this year there’s one small difference: you. We are making a play about your first few weeks in college, the lectures you hate, the societies you love, the boy/girl of your dreams that you saw across front square and although you haven’t spoken to properly yet you know your definitely soulmates... but mostly ‘Fresh’ is about you. A play about Freshers , created by Freshers, for Freshers - join us on a journey that is only just beginning.

dir. Emer Heatley

It is 1911 and in the colonial India of the British Raj, where 10 year old Mary Lennox has grown up as the only child of parents who do not love or care for her. A devastating earthquake has hit, leaving the entire Lennox household dead and Mary orphaned. Mary, a cold, contrary child is shipped off to England to live with her uncle in Misselthwaite Manor in Yorkshire. The house is dark and silent, and her widowed uncle, still grieving for his dead wife, is largely absent. Left alone in a house filled with locked doors and nighttime cries, the curious Mary begins to occupy herself with discovering the secrets of the manor.

13

CO-OP The Freshers’ Co-Op, with a cast of 50 and a production team of around 30 is the largest, most extravagant event on the DU Players calendar and one of the society’s oldest and proudest traditions. Co-Op is a weird and wonderful experience from the kick off with a light hearted group audition with the four directors where you have the opportunity to embarrass yourself through the medium of song, dance and improve! Whether acting is your passion or you’ve never stepped foot in a theatre, Co-Op has something for everyone and prides itself on teamwork and the magnificent atmosphere created by the cast themselves through numerous team building nights-out organised by the 5 wonderful producers. This wacky 6 week odyssey culminates in the performance of a collection of bright, shiny happy Player virgins popping their performance cherries in a bizarre show based around the cast and penned by the 4 directors. CoOp is an event backed by the entire society and is the perfect way to be introduced to Players, meet 50 new friends and have an experience you will always treasure for the rest of college life! So sign up, strap in, and enjoy the ride!

n a h T e r o Fancy m ng? i just act

P.I.Ps

Players Introductory Programmes

For those looking to hone new skills or expand their horizons.

Players Introductory Programmes are the perfect way to get involved and discover your hidden talents. Join weekly workshops and learns the technical aspects of theatre such as lights and costume as well as playwriting, which all culminates in a large showcase Email festivals@duplayers.com for more info 14

auditions. wednesday

thursday

friday

1100

Girls Like That Th Fresh! RR History Boys GD

Powerpuff Girls Th Fresh! RR Secret Garden GD

Girls Like That Th Fresh! RR History Boys GD

1200

Co-op Th Secret Garden RR History Boys GD Schoolgate C. BD

Co-op Th Powerpuff Girls RR Fresh! GD Schoolgate C. BD

Co-op Th Secret Garden RR History Boys GD

1300

Co-op Th Powerpuff Girls RR Schoolgate C. GD Fresh! BD

Co-op Th Girls Like That RR Fresh! GD History Boys BD

Co-op Th Girls Like That Fresh! GD

1400

Girls Like That Th Powerpuff Girls RR Schoolgate C. GD Fresh! BD

Powerpuff Girls Th Girls Like That RR Schoolgate C. GD History Boys BD

Girls Like That Th Powerpuff Girls RR Fresh! GD Schoolgate C. BD

1500

Co-op Th Girls Like That Secret Garden

Co-op Th Secret Garden Schoolgate C.

Co-op Th Powerpuff Girls RR Secret Garden GD Schoolgate C. BD

1600

RR GD

Powerpuff Girls Th History Boys RR Secret Garden GD

RR GD

Girls Like That Th Secret Garden RR History Boys GD

RR

Powerpuff Girls Th Schoolgate C. RR Secret Garden GD History Boys BD

Th Theatre RR Rehearsal Room BD Boys’ Dressing Room GD Girls’ Dressing Room 15

FRESHERS WEEK monday 11.00 Players Front of House opens for the week, all welcome to chill and drink tea.

tuesday 11.00 Recovery breakfast.

wedne 11.00

Recovery breakfas 12.00

Audition Workshop Johnson

16.00 Bar opens.

13.00 - 17.00

Society serving refreshments from 4 with light entertainment in Front of House to get your first College night off to a flying start.

Auditons.

19.00 Move into theatre for ENTS PREPARTY 19.00 In collaboration with the Phil, Players brings you PLAY PHILTHY: GAME SHOW EDITION 20.30 23.00 We LAUNCH FRESHERS WEEK with VdP and Trinity Ents in District 8.

First college night out, always one to remember.

16

PARTY TIME in association with The Phil.

19.00

BOILER ROOM N Snowsports, TTV

TIMETABLE 2015

esday

st.

p with Dr. Nicholas

NIGHT w/DUDJ,

thursday 11.00 Recovery breakfast.

friday 11.00 Recovery breakfast.

12.00 - 17.00 Auditons.

12.00 - 17.00 Auditons.

20.00 COMEDY & MUSIC SHOWCASE

20.00 Let’s get ready to rumble a killer with the WRESTLEMANIA: MURDER MYSTERY

17

You’re in Good Company.

Alumni...

Past Guests...

We have been very lucky with the guests and patrons we’ve had in the past! This of course will continue this year.

We have plenty of guests planned for our members this year, including Chris O’Dowd, Saoirse Ronan, James and Oliver Phelps and many, many more

18

Tyger, tyger, burning bright…

Summers turn to Winter and weeks turn to months, but one thing is a constant in our theatre

2334

DU Players trusty mascot breaks his silence and gives his observations on Players over the years; Another year, another influx of fresh faces. What’s that? You got into college? I don’t give a damn, you. Go bother someone else with your sparkly personality and loud voice. Listen up, you little freaks. I am Players, and I’m here to tell you that you should get out of this jungle while you still can. I’ve been sitting here for aeons, watching the same thing every year. So, you got a part in a Fresher’s show? A DEVISED Freshers show? Woop di bloody do! What do you want, an Oscar? Unless you do some useless Orts course there’s no time for you to fit in here, to give your heart and soul to this damn society, to dedicate your Wednesday nights to ‘the sesh’, and to perfect the art of saying ‘that’s…SO KEY’ in the right tone of voice. I get mauled on these couches more frequently than the multitudes of idiotic Freshers and I’m telling you, the shine wears off, quicker than it wore off these ‘new’ couches. I used to have it all. I actually used to live in our Societies Un-named Presidents house. Those were the halcyon days, before she banished me years ago to this wooden cage of a building to keep an eye on all you nitwits, to lend a hand to useless Chairs, and to be a loyal audience member for every single show that’s ever been put on here. I’m the mascot, the emblem, the ‘brand’ … and what thanks do I get? Nothing. They don’t even feed me. I have to survive on forgotten chicken fillet rolls and scraps from that manky kitchen. This ain’t even a jungle, kiddo, it’s a God damn zoo.

Impressed by the colourful designs in Front of House? All those flowers and paper decorations are the shattered dreams of old Players members who spontaneously combusted once they stepped out of the damn place and had nothing more to live for. Oh, you like that cool, hip, quirky, awesome piano? It’s splattered with the innards of old committee members. Tradition dictates that the new committee must brutally sacrifice them to the Gods so that the heating and electricity bills will somehow mysteriously keep getting paid to keep you losers warm on Wednesday nights as you’re guzzling tepid beverages and eyeing up hipster girls way out of your league.

Don’t get me started on ‘acting’ and ‘actors’ - pretending to be an angsty teenager under a spotlight is no special achievement, moron. Go prove yourself to mum and dad somewhere else. Or maybe there really is a spot for you here amongst all this nonsense. They could stick you in the tech box - after all, out of sight, out of mind! Or they might ask you to be a ‘producer’, i.e; to organise their stupid bake sales. Perhaps they’ll stick you in the basement, so you’ll never be seen again. Either way, you better dust off your vintage runners and buy some quirky patterned shirts ASAP if you want to look like you might be useful here. *Exhale* Ok, maybe it’s time for me to change my stripes, retract my claws a bit. Players isn’t that bad. Sometimes a show comes along that really makes your breath catch in your throat, your heart beat faster, the hairs stand up on your arms. On some normal weekday afternoon the theatre can suddenly become a transcendent space, where ideas and emotions are free to tussle beautifully under a spotlight as you look on in awe. Players can help you realise what student theatre is all about, what it can achieve, the talent it can house and nurture. It’s on those days I approach something like a vague feeling of pride to represent you all.

Ok I can’t keep this going on. You all make me sick. I’m signing off for now. Wake me up when Co-Op is over.

The Tiger 19

Someone Old, Someone New My favourite movie of all time: Annie Hall. Opening Scene: an incredibly young, bespectacled Woody Allen is standing against a brown backdrop. He wears a tweed jacket with lapels so wide that a small aircraft could land on one of them. Underneath the jacket he wears a red tartan shirt, and underneath that a t-shirt. He is talking straight at camera: “There’s an old joke. Uh, two elderly women are at a Catskills mountain resort, and one of ‘em says: “Boy, the food at this place is really terrible.” The other one says, “Yeah, I know, and such ... small portions.” Well, that’s essentially how I feel about life. Full of loneliness and misery and suffering and unhappiness, and it’s all over much too quickly.”

Annie Hall won best picture at the Oscars in 1978. By the time I walked through the Front Gate of Trinity College in September 1978 as a fresh-faced freshman during Freshers Week, I had already seen “Annie Hall” three times. It was a fresh sunny day and in Front Square all the Societies and Clubs were pitching for new fresh members. D.U. Players were auditioning for a play called “Death” by the man-of-the- moment - Woody Allen. Auditions in the Players Theatre, Number 4 Front Square.

Fame beckoned. I joined Players.

The protagonist of “Death” is Kleinman, a typically compulsive Allen anti-hero, all worry and hesitation, who is awoken during the night by a group of local vigilantes who tear him from his bed as they try to track down a homicidal maniac who is running amok in New York City.That afternoon, I auditioned for “Death”. I got a part. Not that of Kleinman, which I had really wanted. But hey - I got a part. I got a script. I was “Man Number 2”. I had two lines. I seem to remember they were: MAN NUMBER TWO: “Yeah, get out of bed, Kleinman” And later on in the play; MAN NUMBER TWO: “Someone’s coming. We’d better hide” These were hardly the lines on which to build a successful stage career. I could hear Woody Allen’s voice as he tells the joke about the women in the Catskills “Yeah, I know, and such ... small portions.”

But I loved being in that play. “Death”. I loved rehearsals. I loved the 6 day run. My parents came twice. They were impressed by my acting. I loved being in Trinity. I loved being in Players. And that’s how it was for the next four years. The truth is it doesn’t matter if you are playing Hamlet or Kleinman or Man Number Two, the art is in the doing of it.

Get involved. Join Players.

I promise that instead of your student days being “full of loneliness and misery and suffering and unhappiness”, those days will instead be full of camaraderie and fun and joy and happiness. Alas, however, as Woody Allen says, like life, it will all be over much too quickly. I’m basing this advice on my own personal experience:

Get a life. Join Players.

20

Gary Jermyn

So Brian McMahon-Gallagher calls me at 3am on a Tuesday.

He wants me to write a piece for his magazine. Something about tips for Freshers’ Week. I say “Brian, why are you calling me at 3am? Is everything alright? Why do I hear sirens?” He tells me not to pry, and to write the damn article. I tell him I’ll do it, fantastic Freshers’ Week, yada yada, hang up. I then realise that it was all lies. What do I know about Freshers’ Week?

Why is it any different to any other week? One step at a time...

First day, I walk with a spring in my step and a gleam in my eye.

Both spring and gleam are currently in storage and will be for the foreseeable future. Anyway, I haven’t even made it through Front Arch when I’m stopped by a guy with goodie bags. My first mistake: I talked to the guy. I’m a sucker for a goodie bag.

I don’t care what’s in them. The guy eventually talks me into opening a bank account. I already had a bank account. Why did I think I’d need a second one? My advice here is if you talk to the guy, don’t get the bank account. Get his phone number, get his bank details for all I care but for a-deity-of-your-choiceor-lack-thereof’s sake (I’ve been asked to keep this P.C.) don’t open the account. For the next six months I got phone calls from the bank wondering why I wasn’t using the account. But hey, maybe you don’t have a bank account. Who am I to tell you how to manage your finances? By the way, the goodie bag was complete horse [expletive], if you hadn’t realised.

Through Front Arch it’s mayhem. People everywhere trying to sign me up for this society, come to this event, buy this watch.

Don’t buy the watches - they stop working after a day. And you’ll join half the societies and never show up to anything.

“But Robbie, it’s worth it for the Captain America’s discount!”

The same [expletive] discount that’s on every [expletive] card?

That’s how they get you. It’s a vicious syndicate, they’re all in it together.

Perhaps you thought this magazine was about pimping and you’re now quivering in fear at the raw feminism that is likely housed between its covers. But if you like drama, joining Players will probably benefit you. Or maybe not, I’m not a psychic, leave me alone.

Newsflash: your new BFF that you met in Opium Lounge or whatever it’s called when you both said “OMG Hozier is my jam. He’s totally the bomb dot com backslash Vietnam!”, then promised to be best friends FIVEever and meet up for waffles in Lemon every Wednesday? You can bet your non-gender specific genitalia you’ll never see them again. Suck it up, you’re an adult now.

You’ll have time later to join societies, lose all your money and make new friends. Freshers’ Week is for having a good time even though you don’t know anybody, getting smashed, and dancing like nobody’s watching. After the immortal Mel Brooks: “Hope for the best, expect the worst.” Give it all you’ve got. Enjoy your first Seshers’ Week! And get some sleep, don’t be a hero, think of your poor mother.

Robbie Doyle

Someone Borrowed, Someone Blue By the time you read this, Maggie will be dead. Not like dead dead, but out of the country and irreverent so same thing.

She was born in Massachusetts in 1994 and knew from the moment she was born she was destined to grace the glamorous Players stage. Just kidding. It’s just a floor. Maggie was known for her versatility, playing an American witch in the Freshers CO-OP, an English maid with an American accent in that play with the way to long title that you won’t remember anyway, and herself in “Wandering Rocks”; working title: “Two Luddites want New Friends to Take Walks With.”

She, if she was here, would tell you how absurdly lucky she was to have a very short life here. And if you happen to be new to this building and these people, congratulations because you’re in the best place you possibly could be.

So audition for everything, melt into the couches, and latch onto the people who will soon be your best friends. She would also tell you to fuck off because sentimentality is for the weak.

Maggie leaves her entire estate to Ronan Carey and Robbie Doyle. Make it last lads. Xx

Maggie Crane

A while ago, I was wallowing in the depths of summertime boredom (Lana Del Rey’s little known B-Side). Unemployed for the entirety of June, I had watched every costume drama on Netflix, dressed in my uniform of sweatpants and old school jumpers.

Getting “un-bored” proved challenging. I toyed with learning a language, then with some Youtube tutorials (origami mainly, with some choux pastry and basic Flamenco), but boredom persisted. In the end, I spent 45 minutes reorganising my phone contacts, ensuring every entry in my phonebook had a surname, and correcting my early phonetic attempts at spelling Irish names.

The task was strangely fulfilling. I felt that maybe this would be the beginning of my new, organised I’m-on-top-of-things life. Maybe tomorrow I’d enrol in a yoga class, or purchase a water bottle with a filter. Today phone contacts, tomorrow ADULT LIFE! Sadly this world of possibility was RUDELY halted by one irritating name: Aisling. I had no idea who she was, how I’d met her, or more importantly what her surname was. How could I do yoga now? Sip my filtered water? How could I live an adult life whilst knowing that I hadn’t accounted for Aisling?

It finally came to me, Aisling was a Fresher’s friend! We met in the queue for Scandinavian Soc, we’d told each other what our names and courses were and promptly forgotten both. In

the mad haze of new faces Aisling, like everyone else I met, held the potential to become my best friend, the godparent to my child, and maybe even one half of a successful synth-pop duo that we would form in the winter of third year.

I never saw Aisling again, but it was a few minutes after she put her number into my phone (sans surname) that I decided to walk from Front Square to Players to audition for something called ‘The Fresher’s Co-Op’. The rest is history...

Three years have gone quickly, and I’ve learnt a lot - though I certainly haven’t read a lot. I still give myself a smug pat on the back if I manage to finish one piece of primary reading before I sit an exam on it; I am ashamed (yet proud) to admit that as an English and Drama undergraduate I have yet to read anything by Beckett; and I still don’t understand what Counter Reserve means. But in spite of these self-inflicted gaps in my education, I will still be entering my final year as a well-rounded, happy almost adult, and that’s all down to my time in Players.

I’m glad that I made that fateful decision to audition for Co-Op all those moons ago. I’m glad I stuck around after to audition for more shows. I’m glad that I attended events and stayed for more than my two free Biere D’Ors. I’m glad that I ran for committee, and most importantly that I saw the masterpiece that was Pucun on the Monday night. I’m glad because until I stumbled across Aisling’s name in my phonebook the other week, I hadn’t once looked back. I hadn’t ever regretted throwing myself head first into everything “extra-curricular” as my mum would say.

Since 2012 Players has provided me with all the pals, cheap plonk, and Paul Simon I could possibly have needed, and I can’t quite believe that this is the last time I’ll get to do it all over again.

At risk of sounding like the man from the Sunscreen Song, all I’m saying here is enjoy it while you can. Squeeze every last drop from your time here because next thing you know all your Aislings will be distant memories, and you’ll be like me: out to pasture, frantically grasping at Masters courses, jobs in the Alumni office, anything ANYTHING simply to cling onto your time here.

Emer Heatley

21

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The introduced tive, of the Greek paLife People O’Connell, “trying to The two that positio Luxembourg,to shift profits by for the exchadirective provid to the right do far apart sides remained n. where the pany paid es thing” very as formation nge of banki comndent and the lackthe weekend ended, Tuesday,Fe ng inKEEN cent. Margatax at 0.0156COLM ber states between EU per tive A bruary17,2 ■ Protes Public gress servedof appreciable memwoman of ret Hodge, chairAffairs Journalists ters in front 015 Edito to underl pro- Royal Palace tion of a , and for the applic last year challenge of the Old LuxleaCorres ponde December the committee, withholding ks investi nt in the rJoyceHick facing ministine the the Greek which houses arent rescue labelle terest gation the A in ctation quest The huge d haviou paym progra . ey Shire’s ers parliam nature for is emai in cache one r “outrageous” ents to EUtax on ina deal. mme. bePremier Athens yester ent in of global lhealth@ir by banks of secre Greek most constan Alexis Tsipra citizens . from themaceu the cental in Switzerland financ e day. PHOTOG refused thus ishtimes.com Swissticals compatnies filespharYanis Varouf their branc s has weake minist er YANNIS BEHRAKIS /REUTER he 18-11 victo-t the world bank RAPH: Taxdomicile taxes h of one meant . continuation far to seek such akis is likely would ’s larges ning rapidlyin Athens is told it is of S compl Riskofdiscl always Shire is up a Six Nacludes Irish a stood that to be ex, he tadded, for banks . ens should , arguing that Attempts one what precise Greece to specify in- be manufpeopl his Ath“Once againosure becaus ummit meetmakers to of several tax acturin e g,who settle druge ing loans receive special bridg- the weekend were made over has still not set administration ly it is seekin approv salesmade to set out ments lectual without and intelout Wedne domicile have shifted its to achiev is with the his pre-occupat en he might g and drawn al as documents with ty nue proper promise the taxComm to Dublin e a com- of formal deman a detailed set fakis sday at which prepared the commitment Revewere in advanc across must be of policy oversig the same kind ission up, from Ireland spread ds possible. to benefi the Irish risk of disclosureion an negoti Mr the world. thant¤4.5 ers for more ators in to Europe- last withdrew suppor Varouturn for to undertake in it is vened and an committees con- bodies which ht by external sels meeting, but e of the Brus- solidat authorities, ’s low corpor to millio “We’r tax rate. further Europ accom said. “Once minute resobering there assortment tle t at previous ate Other client en. trying to ed docum a single conOnly then bailouts. panied its in if any substantive was litof paragain I ” the note ean aid. liamentary talks with for a resumptionthe out for It has been singled right do the ent. thing ected The oured s have scrutin dealer for the includ to headw meetin The the of be our to “conve can a push be made plied with. procedures comengage endea troika. to country’s e stakeh ay day g in Brusse whobecaus reassure committee y by Ms Hodge s ers, ver it transold munit follows stalem there is banks are commercial Greek negoti ments betwee e in thearms oldAfrica ls tohim that With the countr rge” the positio Killing field no risk of n ionsend, compa ny in part because ’s nmore ators and child we can ate and cony and its credito n of countr the other 18 euro easlip has to the Editorial on ad hoc increasingly reliant from the EU-IM ing. He that happe officials fusion at emergency ersthe was previo rs, invest search soldie in blood Although comment: ies s traffickmentioned zone based in emerg in reF troika. and develo nRememb ked vertediamo talks last main paper; the curren rs. usly the UK and had been tion to theunited in their objec- from the Greek ency fundin ciates rescue progra nds, andpment t listed in Londo some high that there remains ofmore Thirdwe asso-, the central bank,g Reform plan page 2 and analysis: scal Papé can serve which is mme itselfGreek big debt Greece’s claim World es in Irelan not expire the Dub ering tients becaus profile requir The files, page 3 for a lar dictat the write-down Last week n. does ck. This is approval ed to seek regu- On Greek televis e noneors. pawhich cover European until February 28th, creditors, put everyo d recently that casR&D today from the compa it emergedcount of the who set lin Pals ion yesterd government had ne is easy the Irish governmentthe country’s its an Centra from the Europ acHSBC Privat ny may be inthat s with today as negotiators have sive.”– taken again ay Mr Cashe on edge.” inexpe spokesman Fullcovera the Copyright eorBank ableGenev has appear new such activitil Bank to contin e- el Sakella nr weeks, a Times holdin Gallipol off for mal applica deadline for a set creasingly isolate ge:Co cial three count ll pleaded guilty ed inBank, Genev st HSBC Priva $100to billion ue tration ridis said the Gabrig moreThe Finanfortion from Limite ubt as to admin d in its EuroFor its es. than GenevabankassulmKeena s of filing to cause parliam was d 2015 te the Athens be- pean engagements. income ing and abettia, on charges tions aroun , led to invest Arts and i incorr Europe on in agreement isWashington busin redK peatedly part, the ECB has tax entary this seais required with the requir ng tax evasioof aid- terna Ideas warne cuit Court returns in the ect , DC-based sulted in d the globe thatiga- notbeessmandetailsw erry There in Finlan approval Policy will not restored Athens thatre- a “national reform ement for tional ny, the Nether In- the d, Germa massive repromis ould given to and was , Tralee, last Cirvestigative Consortium having is nothing illegal n. ments plan”. an alterna it cultur He source tax insiste fined . nia to prolonlands and Esto-- The harden es year, a of They about e of in Intive Journ ¤25,0 d, howev the were given settle- Revenue:page2 also made ing of attitud Swiss bank. via the Frenc the and Irish Swiss bank accou Revenue alists It said 00. He cue plan aid if the current capital g the curren scheme. to Revenuead is not prolon clients on res- wouldTsipras admin er, that nt, Mond h newsp (ICIJ), ing exerc an “intensive ment, of a ¤102,000 tax has t about s has fuelled sceptices in clude a numb French Commissioners the istrati The the not vised , when e. de-risk- ■ Revenue decid aper Le settleEuropean the Greek which ise” has by the notto ism raised stance of the ged. er of well-klist in- ing in The Irish Times ments maderenege on common busin ess pursue government’s 2010 andauthorities in ECB been arguin negotiators have capacity to d that is work- fall almost by half, seen deposits not enough evidened there was tax and the rest ¤29,000 was seriou itnown and partnership Greek banks s concern has ple and that to the Greek peopenalties. at the end interest policy promisexecute whatev lin-based peopl e and to $68 billion taking case

by The Irishhave now been June HSBC:page 3 ce to justify with the dow is requirg that a 10-day d been that contin there Dub- tions45 other media investment ICIJ seen Backg against the of Times. ed to secure win- the event es it may make er out of cash could quickly ment whenHe declined to and uation of would be no Since 2010, ch euround funds. organisa- $118.4 billion last year, from Geneva bank run in comif there is such seeks in that a progra contacted. in 2007. overview:p and the inform based on producing repor Confidential mme no new “that has the charac has led to The Europ The an extens it ultimately deal to continue ptain the files. the previo ation age4 teristics bailou ion of the the ts a formebank files were ean Comm last year However, settlements a total of 20 tax settlements of us bailou HSBC, which as a cur- banks’ t, as the qualitycurrent ments” ission r employee, copied by t agree, directive amended the saving of the balances ciani, durin reports collateral billion euro people whothere are also lion, and more than ¤4.5 for – the Hervé multiThree for aid from s offshore to stop people and were g 2006 and Fal- tion, the and other inform settlements made confid Irish has issued quarterly profit prosecutionto three succe mil- authorities said: Tsipras tookweeks after using entitie 2007, files also ential to ssful and seized in a ain Franc with Mr office, it part of a with a fourths for tax offenc The Irish lengthy statem s, French police e, Belgiu a raid by of contacts with contain notes the objectives s to circumvent ■ Ireland Argentina, is underschem Revenue as ent Times of m wing the d the feels e home media Simon Zebo shore and target Figur the In However, case pending. es, Commission the case customers. the in 2009. on his father’s es given directive. of Irish busin ers decidRevenue have deposits in 2004. ing off- Swiss groups involved other in contr n as the the full weight of Times man John to Schmidt Mr Falcia ast to the there was not Leaks projec made settle French pack Other in the ess- amou by Revenue The Irish ni was charg Cashe ll of Ireland was “hugely proud” enoug ed that the ink the Six Cashell last year during in the files t. ments sinces The statem show the nt of mone (59), Sugar-f ed Radle Nations Champ in to justify h evidence sion data came into Saturday’s’s defensive effort in ugh tie against ent admit y Irish citizen dustrial Switzerland withlate tems, Trale y Business of have on depos stand a case being the posse ionship of Reven espionage Sys- is e, Co Kerry in- on Teagasc researc Januar ree aspects of endgame, and other s- shoul ards were not s that ing bank at Stadium France at Aviva much greate it in Switzerlands The files ue. the perform d have been as they hers partner , the team’s secrecy. and violat- thehis file records how , a note with such as hat were r than is ance, advisor torney gener neva, succes seventh Weight y their The Swiss with in HSBC obtain bank from other secret he the industr y network of a knee in ed by agem but claims that and set-piec kick-off strategy Gey to drive atbe PHOTOGRsive home win.

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by Lauren ’s display r to either been very the referees have England 47Italy1 the tackle Barac in easter Saturda and presid in a who fire 7 s, for covering from k revise cease when strict Obam is propo y,Febru Ireland18 ent d over in the a reassuring turn- that playing Sextont Bénézech know whose not and I a today fence sals for drawal of n Ukraine, the France11 pone a 10-0 to win re- take as much on. We have to Scotland vItaly, ary,28th don’t spite, he reckone why he to post- flict that has claim was a big a conwith- year’s capacity domin Sunday care foreig de- possibl then re-emeeighth minute, and mistake. greater 5,300 lives defensivedecision on sendi by this fella got brought into it ed more d, having Francev Wales, 2.30 y can and of that as we Scotland try unfairly auton n troops and ence. Munich secur ated this senato Sexton’s than tist one since ing clash of rged from a sickenthat will 5.0 23Wales 26 polishe an opinion who seems to have pending arms to Ukrai ng Sunday, March1 After meeti last April. ity confe regions but omy for separ be ing another ruled out and leav- something we will President opulist politic on everyth r- ed Dr r John McCain half with theheads in the second mance confirmed d perfora- to make couple behind. on in the lead-up be working it has been Obam effort for a fresh diplom ne dent Vladim ng Russian presiIrelandv England, st his status castigat“They put Merkel’s murder when ians geting.” have in a whole a final decisi a has yet deavo wide- public away a ceasefire atic on required “six same player which not only the best outhalf as 3pm “We’d contestto England. day in Minsk talking about with game. We’re Wales. I thinka lot of pressure on Friday, ir Putin in Mosco on but on Wedn land but or seven” urs with diplomatic enspendi an and eraging facts. in Irea ReDr ng Tax avstitches es“He w Wales Merke Demo did ing tors “grav . He had probably anywhe good side a head Reducing are a very those scrum penaltienumber of so that seven penalties a game, hard at that crat sena- ish” and compMoscow as “foolMr Obam . l expressed as we get and tax promises; their visiting Munic incenti modelling will assum e doubts” re. been aware and Greenhouse over the couple ment to be absolutinjury assesshave ared then ■ Germ that e some Kiev be suppl could tuned out. into details, most as soon changeve and other effects kel in Wash a receives Dr hat they have for a side to do said, adding : “To s,” he also for us. was really disappointing of days that we’re h demanded 1938 Munic Gas Emissio an ely, 100 per made of his return. of the fuss cent sure I felt we were people s, such that Mer- Kiev’s be resolved the conflict first-half penaltie h agreement to the from tax have 15 to be doing problem ns ble: use ied with ington in Galway ■and chanc he said WeshouThis is quite lowed missil and hing ing with people by when somehe “Joe amid ellor unders pretty ,” certain anti-ta divisio in ldn’tget es, Nazi abuse was that s, milita had Mainta referen nine against trying to make rates work radar well.” showing growFrance and tandaanother analyslow earners. No, a word with facts LiamTo of dry statisti tooexci ining Clean ry capac boosting ce to the no signs of concuss Angela Merke technology nk Sudetenlan Germany annex alarmed troop the effort ly two-day get-tog tic and ns – both transa tax adviser less and others go up some me yes- rarely land’sa inform this is ity.

Water csted: ion but they terday, that he couldn’ is of relativ did it as a was aroundsix against us, that avoid that. So, but merely to spend more and the thisnalysis d. l For examp debate. means wants the Despite such ether this week. e poverty not on effects s. There will be negativ whether acros s Europ e tlan- ‘Bitter truth’ weren’t happy we certainly an observ Last week transporters.

US secre about what on nearly le, a key part Grass was absoluprecaution and he believe it. I had been t really levels a bruisin US to fiscal for the ation Basedto offer – on tary against Ashto you plans with 33 put broade of ■ of Livestoc tely per Penta that Irelandp of Accord tance off is the cent our to fine,” said game for 12 weeks. out of the r econom e knock- earn less aspect sending raise abrasive g affair Schmidt. gon officia n Carter, the Kerry, however, of state John game and Systems of self-em another fact: layittaxes onSinn Féin’s lucky positio to Kiev’s kmilita ry assis- “This cannot be y French we’ll be work- the only concer than the top ing to Revenu arms to says that ployed people bythebnook: battle won people in that is the Russian of earnin actually worse ¤20,000 a year. ¤100,0 Ukraine the White Housl nominated by was “no split” overinsisted there I shouldn One guy Asked if he n was Jamie, the ¤225 rate of tax by 1 e, an increase of separatists with pro- Merke Heaslip due g bitter truth,militarily, 00. ’t play be- GerryT cause Bastare per cent will considered defence e to head Ukraine, ern region million in argument more than to the aftereff placing way self-em than that becaus(It’s about how Anhornley in its east” said l on depar just “peopweapons for a full raise then s.

433,600 ployed income ects Schmid Sexton, an exasper re- Like, well then aud is playing e of the tors he would tment, told the create one”. nich secur Saturday at the Dr ly breac That’s 82,000 people who year. But of the le trying ? raise.much money such ensues After Wash ated I can never would t said: “If I hed. is 30 per cent to a change pay There is even be likely senaington, the can say it any because next week play German ity conference Mu- plan is under The new Minsk port such man leade neurial classes members of recorded.) the ■ ‘Sexton Looking earn ¤100,0 the top rate, only to suphappy a row over our entrep lot . The wider leader, fearin efforts.

I’m going curren t margin have to play stood to Minsk meeti to Wednesday average industrmaking a lot to ittohave what highless than ¤225 million00 or more. So way summ r will attend a Ger- ing arms real tax against Fritz what propose mightpassed to Kiev would g supply- Ukrai buffer zone a earner be under rate is, let alone ’s a ial earnin less than will Lee.Some eign minis ng, Russian Becaus defining capital withit in the Belaru four- Putin a propa any new regime gs. between Militarysolutions nian forces lion at most.s’ levy. I reckon be raised by a politictest’ forter Serge ians and think-t about ¤130 ganda hand Mr sian the presid ssian stead expens e it is assumed they lysts like US spoke of .

If we are and Ukraine, money, eye-wa to must claim mil- they es not allowable “good groun y Lavrov to talk Russia and ents of fresh supports sanctivictory, in- clear separatists and pro-Rus- said vice president ly low, usingclaim our tax rates ank anamism” don’t get tering increa serious Joe ds in Munic lay ons and diplomatic are relativ France, similar taxfor PAYE workers, means ses in taxes don’t label numbers that conven a achievsequence of target out a lin’s doubt h he share Biden Petro while Ukraine for optiepush.

Last Septe for workerthese lower-paid credits. This ed. s to be s about milita d Ber- hope Poroshenko president as a tax anduniversal social charge iently If we self-em mber tions s often Debat misme ’s are ployed to for face ry the Minsk Breeding e solua tax rates income. What to asure self-em (USC) “swift andexpressed talk from only New Potato Kiev’s right conflict but backe tional cease than their much higher effectiv dangers over the merit serious mon ployme uncondiare the facts? some very s Varieties PAYE counte of boost e to defend fire”. d According nt eye-water ing Kiev’s and ey, With rparts.

Satellite Mappin Noincometax supplied helpful datasets recent to de- Hous an eye on todayitself.

by Revenu g for Precisio taxes for ing increases in e meeti Some more ’s people (more Cold war e there will ly n Farmin ng, Repu White facts: this g “units”) earnintechnically, tax-pabe 129,919 leaders chill as year 881,70 have to behigh earners will will pay no income blican Sexing Today Semen clash over will see ying 0 people cent of all year. (There g more than tax at all. impleme Animal Ukraine: a mixtu cloud and for ¤100,0 That’s 38 Breedin re ofg page 9 nted people, 28income earners. Some units/payers are a total of 2,341,2 00 this high per fog in placesunny breaks, with in the countr earners 648,70 00 tax neither taxper cent of worker y). will reach s. Temperatur s, will pay 0 nor USC. What will will have to be implem Highea It highs rners es of 8 degre es of a marginbe the economic conseqented. “lift is an understandab ham’s side High earner es as many people le impera with Etna uenca 2-15 cent? I suspec al tax rate of 60-plu tive Oak door tax net”. taxpayers. s comprise 6 per THEIRISHTI Some Clare to 1-17 victory. t there will s per 1916:The It is only as possible out to earner panels cent They “Sure of be s 24-28T of will right and pay all jected to what officials hadof fewer if hand all income that plenty less. for araStre MES high obwas over the low paidthe But us we43would Telephone:(01et,Dublin 2 tax and USC hassaidit Government per cent The economy will of visits to accoun been what we wishwe should be carefu earnershave dry ball being seemed to be to will coughtrying )6758000 be smalle toin a thing, be noted tants.

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The Player Vol VI, Issue I