Dublin University Gender Equality Society

DUGES

Dublin University Gender Equality Society

EDITORS NOTE The idea behind this publication is to give resources and indicators on what to do, and how to act if a certain situation arises. We hope you find this helpful!

Self-care is any deliberate, self-initiated human function for the purposes of maintenance of health and wellbeing. For this reason, selfcare looks different for everyone. It is important to figure out what works for you in order to have a balanced life and ensuring escapism methods are not necessary.

None of the exercises mentioned here are intended to be a complete solution to your problems, and you should keep in mind that seeing a therapist or doctor, taking medication, or seeking other therapeutic assistance are all valid, necessary, and may be exactly what you need at a given time and in a given situation.

EDITORS FAYE MURPHY ANA SAINZ DE MURIETA

TABLE OF CONTENTS Intro to DUGES

04

Nurtures

06

Nourishes

07

Sex Positivity and Consent

08

Crisis Pregnancy and Contraception

09 Sexual and Menstrual Health

10

Self Care and Looking Out for Others

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Dealing with Burn Out

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Quick Tips

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Resources

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INTRO TO DUGES Who we are: FemSoc is the self-identifying feminist society in Trinity College. You may also know of us by the name DU Gender Equality Society (DUGES). We are activists, feminists and students and staff of Trinity College aiming to continue the on-campus conversation around gender issues. We believe in intersectional feminism and we strive to be as inclusive and accessible as possible.

We aspire to foster and encourage social change and student activism, and to achieve this through a wide range of social and educational events. Every week we put on feminist themed events such as panel discussions, workshops and guest speakers. We are located in the Attic, on the top floor of House 6.

Coffee hours: Our FemSoc Coffee Hours are open to all members.

Even if sometimes we set a theme for discussion, they are also a space to unwind and have some tea and biscuits with fellow feminists. We used to hold them in our room in the Attic, but we still have them regularly on Zoom!

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INTRO TO DUGES Book Club and Film Club: We host about 3 book clubs per year, which are announced in advance. Everyone is welcome to the discussion, whether you have read the book or just want to learn! We also have several film screening events, and sometimes organise trips to the cinema!

Herstory: Founded in 2016, the Herstory movement tells the stories of modern, historic, and mythic women. For 5 consecutive years, DUGES has collaborated with DU History to host the Herstory Salon, where our speakers are invited to share stories of pioneering women, commemorating the important roles many have served throughout history.

International Women’s Week: Every year we collaborate with the Students’ Union (TCDSU) in the organization of International Women’s Week, which takes place around International Women’s Day (8th March). This is a week full of events and panels around feminism that ends up with our FemSoc Speakeasy. All are invited to participate!

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NURTURES FemSoc Nurtures is an initiative of FemSoc (DU Gender Equality Society), that acts as a support network for people of all genders in the Trinity College community who may have been affected by sexual assault, rape, and recurrent media and social media coverage.

The group aims to create a welcoming and inviting atmosphere, free of the judgement and discrimination of rape culture. While this is not a closed space, as we do not want anyone to have to ‘out’ themselves simply by being here, the priority is making survivors of sexual violence and harassment feel safe and supported. The focus of the group is on creating a positive change, providing space, support and solidarity to all members and sharing self-care resources to help look after our own well-being and mental health. We will work alongside other college support services such as the Student Counselling Service, Student2Student Peer Supporters and the SU’s Welfare officer to meet these aims.

This space is intended to be a comfortable and respectful space for all survivors of sexual harassment, assault and violence. We aim to listen with the intent to understand the contributions of others. We will not dominate discussions with claims of authority and will be aware of any privilege we hold. We recognise the range of experiences of non-consent that members may have experiences and will be aware of our choice of words, endeavouring to minimise the disclosure of triggering details of these experiences in group situations because of the potential for harm to other members.

We recognise the intersections of oppression that affect the engagement of members with this and other supports, and will not use language that offends on the basis of gender, race, ethnicity, religion, body, ability, sexual orientation, or gender identity. We agree that this is not a space for all political discussions and aim to be as ideologically inclusive as possible.

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NOURISHES FemSoc Nourishes is an initiative of FemSoc (DU Gender Equality Society), that acts as a support network for people of all genders in the Trinity College community who struggle with body image and related issues. This support network offers and encourages positive discourse on body image and a support space for those suffering from eating disorders.

We have all been affected by the perfectly polished pictures on social media, constantly wondering if we are ever going to look like the person in the picture and if we are ever going to feel like we are enough. If you finally want to end this cycle, Nourishes is the right place for you! We love to rant about the roles sexism and toxic masculinity play in today’s unobtainable beauty standards, rage-inducing clothing sizes, diet culture, and, most importantly, we love to remind each other that all our bodies are valid. Join us to convince yourself that there is so much more to you than your appearance!

In the meantime, here are some Instagram accounts for a quick reality check: @_nelly_london, she struggled in the past with an eating disorder and now dedicates her time to showing the world that, no matter what society decides you should like, you can wear anything that makes you feel beautiful! @saggysara, she too struggled with eating disorders and is now on Instagram to show how most of the "perfect bodies" we see online are just poses, edits, lighting and angles. She's also working to normalise body hair and skin texture! @yourbodyisworthy, an account whose goal is to show as many different people, sizes, shapes as possible to make us all realise we are worthy no matter what we look like.

Finally, some food for thought: do you believe the body positivity movement itself can be toxic, at times? Should we rather focus on body neutrality and accepting that our body has specific functions that it fulfils regardless of what it looks like? Would you rather love or accept your body no matter what? For more lovely discussions of this kind, make sure to not miss our events, we would love to hear your experiences and your perspectives!

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SEX POSITIVITY Like most feminist terms, sex postivity means loads of different things to different people. In general terms it is the idea that all sex, as long as it’s explicitly consensual, enthusiastic and healthy, is a positive thing.

Over history, women have been shamed for desiring or even enjoying sex.

Women are socialized to fear and even hate their own bodies and many go most of their lives without understanding the most intimate parts of their own sexual health. The core of sex positivity is the idea of informed consent and agency within one’s own sexuality. For some people this means having lots of sex. For other people it might mean abstaining. Sex positivity aims to remove stigma and shame from all sexual choices.

CONSENT In recent years, there has been an emphasis on consent in college. We need to continue the conversation about what makes an activity consensual, especially in college campuses. According to the

Sexual

Experiences Survey conducted by NUI Galway in 2020, nearly 30% of female college students in Ireland claim to have been sexually assaulted.

As a society we are starting to understand that ‘No means no’, but that is only the beginning. Only yes means yes, and that yes must be enthusiastic and freely given. Apart from consent being mandatory, good communication will make the encounter more enjoyable for all the parts involved. Make an effort to communicate clearly with your partner(s) and set clear boundaries so that everyone stays safe and has fun.

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CRISIS PREGNANCY When faced with an unanticipated pregnancy, you have a variety of options to take. However, before deciding how to handle a crisis pregnancy, you should explore your options with a calm and educated person trained to provide support and information. The Irish Family Planning Association, here2help, and the Well Women’s Centre are good places to start. These are Dublin based

clinics.

If

in

need

of

others,

follow

this

link:

http://www.positiveoptions.ie/.

Before checking out other crisis pregnancy advice services, be aware that some have an ulterior agenda. They may attempt to influence your decision in how you deal with your pregnancy. Remember you are the one with the power to decide. Remember you are the one with the power to decide.

CONTRACEPTION After consenting to sex, sex should be as safe as possible. Contraceptives can both prevent unplanned pregnancy and the spread of STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections). TCDSU have a super helpful, comprehensive guide to contraception on their website, but talk to your GP for more information on which type of contraception may suit you best.

Condoms are freely available from the SU, but other forms of contraception include the pill, a vaginal ring, the patch, the coil (IUD/Mirena/copper) & dental dams are available through GPs and/or pharmacies. Even when using hormonal contraception, a barrier contraceptive such as a condom or dental dam is required to prevent STIs.

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MENSTRUAL HEALTH Menstrual health is all about taking care of your body in relation to the menstrual cycle, particularly menstruation. Comfort, hygiene, privacy and safety should all be supported during menstruation. Alternative menstrual products are better for the environment, have a lower risk of toxic shock and are cheaper in the long run: what more could you want? We strongly encourage you to give them a shot and find what works for you!

Menstrual cups are reusable silicone cups that are worn inside the vagina and catch menstrual fluid while holding more fluid than a tampon, and they are emptied and rinsed every few hours. They are a little pricey in comparison to a box of tampons but are available in a pharmacy and can last forever.

Thinx Period Pants are super absorbent, odour and bacteria resistant underwear that are still comfortable but can soak up to two tampons worth of blood without leaking. However, like the menstrual cup, they are relatively expensive, although Penney's have recently released their own version.

Extra help: Download the Clue or Flo* period tracker app! *this app uses quite binary language and can be seen as exclusive

SEXUAL HEALTH Sometimes, no matter how careful we are, STIs happen. They occur regularly and shouldn’t be stigmatised! It’s important to get regular check-ups, preferably between partners, no matter how safe you think you’ve been. Read up on different infections which are easily transmitted, such as chlamydia, gonorrhoea, genital warts, pubic lice, trichomonas vaginalis, syphilis, to name a few.

Here’s where you can go to get checked out: Trinity College Health Centre - quick, costs less than €20 and manageable between lectures if you’re an on-campus student, and results in two weeks!

St. James’ Hospital Guide Clinic - free, walk-in clinics three times a week, you can also get tested for HIV and receive PreP treatment.

The Gay Men’s Health Service Clinic, Baggot St - Monday 2-4 pm for an HIV test, Tuesdays and Wednesdays for a full STI clinical service for all men who have sex with other men or transgender people.

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SELF CARE We will introduce self-care by clearing up one common misconception from the get-go: self-care does not mean self-indulgence or being selfish. It is not the simple act of taking a bath or treating ourselves to some new lipstick.

Instead, self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy, you can be well, you can do your job, you can help and care for others, and you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day.

This can be done through very mundane things, such as spending a bit longer cooking dinner, taking a shower, making a timetable or going for a quiet walk.

Your self-care might look different to everyone else’s, as different practices will work for each of us at particular times and in particular situations. Often people take bits of different practices and put them together into one that suits them best. Here we would like to suggest some options for you!

LOOKING OUT FOR OTHERS In the past years, we have started to understand the importance of self-care, but in communities and activist groups, it is just as important to look outwards. When group members are burnt out, it is hard to get work done as a team. Keeping an eye on those around you can help to keep the group functioning efficiently. This involves both checking in with members of your communities and communicating with others when you need to take a break.

It is a good idea to have social or self-care events with the only goal of relaxing, such as potlucks, tea mornings or walks.

These communications may avoid the possibility of tasks falling by the wayside or frustration when members seem to be slacking or avoiding work and meetings. It’s a good idea to have times when you meet as a group to have social or self-care events that don’t have a productivity goal, such as potlucks, tea mornings, or a walk together.

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BURN OUT Burnout is a state of severe mental, emotional and physical exhaustion caused by prolonged stress and overwork. It is an unpleasant and unproductive state that leaves you with diminished energy and causes us to forget the reasons and motivation for some role.

Burnout is especially prevalent amongst the student population.

Whether in college societies or class groups, the intense college environment can mean we spread ourselves too thinly and lose the balance that makes our lifestyle sustainable.

If left unchecked, burnout can have severe consequences for the work we are trying to do and even our health, both physical and mental. Long term stress weakens our immune system, leaving us prone to illness and infection. Moreover, it affects our ability to concentrate, affecting our academic work. Moreover, it can take a toll on our mental health and even relationships.

Ultimately, having a balance of self-care, leisure time, and work prevents burnout and helps us maintain our wellbeing and the longterm sustainability of our networks.

One of the keys to this is identifying when we are not at our best, when we feel we are reaching our capacity, and having the self-awareness to acknowledge when it is happening.

The next step is finding ways to fix this and avoid full-on burnout if possible and slowly return to health.

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QUICK TIPS Journal for 15 minutes each day Do a Youtube workout in your room Draw or paint something Visit a gallery Go dancing Meet up with a friend for coffee Read something Have a one-person karaoke session in your room Do a 10 minute guided meditation Stretch your muscles Commit a random act of kindness Make a list of something you are proud of for the day Move to a new environment, try reading in a café, a park, or a different part of the library.

Write someone a card, or maybe a thank you note, hand-deliver or post it to the recipient.

Water your houseplants Light a candle.

Write down 10 things you are grateful for.

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RESOURCES Links to our social media: Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/duge nder.equality/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/dugesociety Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/du_g ender_equality Nourishes Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dug esnourishes/ Nurtures Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dug esnurtures/

Helplines and mental health supports: Samaritans – 116 123 Yourmentalhealth.ie TCD Student Counselling service: http://www.tcd.ie/Student_Coun selling/ TCD Health Centre: http://www.tcd.ie/collegehealth/ service/overview.php http://www.insightmatters.ie/ Dublin-based inclusive and affordable counselling service ReachOut.com Aware – 1800 80 48 48 Depression and anxiety support Pieta House – 1800 247 247 Selfharm prevention Walk In My Shoes – 01 249 33 33 Outreach arm of St Patrick’s Mental Health Service LGBT Helpline – 1890 929 539 Bodywhys – 1890 200 444 ED information and recovery supports www.alustforlife.com- Irish mental health website with a range of articles on many topics

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RESOURCES RESOURCES STI clinics http://www.guideclinic.ie/ge neral-information - St James Guide Clinic http://www.hse.ie/eng/servic es/list/5/sexhealth/gmhs/clin ics/ - Gay Men’s health service https://www.letsgetchecked. com/ - self-check kits Contraception http://www.thinkcontracepti on.ie/ContraceptionChoices/Myths-about-thePill.154.1.aspx - mythbusting and much other info about contraception https://www.ifpa.ie/SexualHealth-Services/Pricelist pricelist of contraceptive options as of 2016, but remember, GP visits are free to TCD students in the Health Centre https://www.tcdsu.org/conta ception TCDSU’s info page, you can also contact the welfare officer or education officer for more info, or call into their office to pick up some free condoms.

Sexuality & gender http://www.belongto.org/ Bi+ Ireland http://www.biireland.com/ http://www.dublinlesbianlin e.ie/ Transgender Equality Network Ireland http://teni.ie/ ITSA Irish Trans Student Alliance https://www.facebook.com/I TSA.IrishTransStudentAllian ce Crisis Pregnancy http://wellwomancentre.ie/c risis-pregnancy/ http://www.here2help.ie/cris is-pregnancy/ https://www.ifpa.ie/Pregnan cy-Counselling The list above is a number of Dublin City Centre based clinics.

For those in the rest of Ireland follow this link below: http://www.positiveoptions.ie/

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"the tiniest little thing can change the course of your day, which can change the course of your year, which can change who you are" TAYLOR SWIFT

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