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Your favourite song delivered easily in any setting when requested; not only at celebratory occasions, a verse was easily sung on the daily bus to Cok University Hospital, lifting the spirits of fellow travellers. It became a day out amongst friends rather than an endurance journey, your broad smile and chuckle always a standard greeting.
You, three Dowling siblings, were such a close-knit family, there was never a fear of you suffering from middle child syndrome. Your gifted hands could fix anything mechanical and the time it took never measured but a task enjoyed.
Being a people person, farming life was solitary, so you enjoyed trips out for a chat and loved callers, even if was a bill to be paid. Being a member of groups like the
Mart Committee, Vintage and Ploughing society, though there was extra work, you took all on board and of course loved the social aspect among friends. Trips to cheer on Kerry with David and the chance of tickets to Munster games with the O’Donnell’s were a joy. Saturday nights were the highlight, as you polished up for a night out at the complex with your buddy Donal, you circulated and chatted with young and old and then rounded up the night together again having digested all the local happenings. Your three girls will always have their memories of your dual role when growing up whilst Rose was at work; from attempting ponytails and knotted hair to getting them out the door to be on time for school. You were ruled by your girls but we know you loved it all really.
You left us without warning, we didn’t see it coming, no chance to say goodbye. Looking back with memories we bless the hours we had with you, your hard-working hands now rest and we leave the rest with God. Your smile could brighten anyone’s day no matter what they were going through. You had a kindly word to say and died loved by all.
We Barney’s family will be eternally grateful for the kindness, support and generosity shown to us throughout this difficult year.
We feel confident that he is in a very comfortable chair in his new home with the numerous mass offerings gifted in his name.
National housing charity Threshold has revealed that it has supported 319 households in the private rented sector since the opening of its dedicated outreach service in Kerry just one year ago (16th August 2019).
The charity urged renters in Kerry to contact its housing advisors for advice and support. Of the most common issues raised by tenants in Kerry over the last year, notices of termination dominated at almost a third (32%), followed by rent increases, Housing Assistance
Payment (HAP) and issues in relation to standards and repairs.
Edel Conlon, Southern Regional Services Manager, Threshold said: “The figures revealed today highlight what we knew already: that issues in the private rented sector are not confined to Ireland’s large cities, but occur in every part of the country. Nearly a quarter of clients in Kerry over the last 12 months required more than one consultation; 64% of the notices of termination seen by our advisors were ultimately
deemed to be invalid; and there were five cases which involved the landlord refusing to accept HAP.

To express our thanks, a mass will be offered for your intentions.
As you greet paradise, adieu, the hills of Kerry.

The patterns that first emerged in more pressurised areas like Dublin and Cork have begun to repeat themselves across the country.“Therefore, Threshold’s presence on the ground is vital in counties such as Kerry whose private rented sectors are growing at speed. Despite the fact that we are unable to interact face-toface with our clients in Kerry at the moment, we remain
acutely aware of the issues that families and individuals are facing and the complex nature of these problems, and we are still assisting tenants on a remote basis for now.”
Threshold’s helpline remains available Monday to Friday, 9am to 9pm at 1800 454 454, and via its website at threshold.ie/advice/help for any renter in need of advice or



ACR OS S F UL L H OM E WAR E A N D GIFTIN G DE PARTMENT S
T RAL E E

T H U R S DAY
3R D S E P T STARTED

Photos by John Cleary










Dr Susan Crean has just recently opened her new practice Susan Crean Dental and Facial Aesthetics at no 12 Denny Street .Susan is pictured here with her team Marie and Marie .” We have been extremely busy since we opened a few weeks ago and are delighted with all the people who have popped in to wish us well “ says Susan . “We are open for new clients also. “As a country and county , we are celebrating all the children going back to school this month and want to emphasise the importance of regular dental examinations and oral hygiene from an early age . With that in mind we are offering all children from age 5-16 a full dental checkup for only €30 “. Susan is also putting all her clients from August and September into a draw for her ‘In House Laser Teeth Whitening ‘ treatment which has a value of €400. Susan can be contacted on 066-7117577, her facebook page or her new website ‘creandental.ie or simply pop in!



(Kerry College) has confirmed a start date for its courses for third level progression of Monday, 21st September. Kerry College is planning for smaller, socially distanced class sizes with learners oncampus every week for full direct delivery, and welcomes back over 3000 learners and apprentices to Tralee . Kerry College Admissions Officer John Herlihy is urging those who are considering staying local this year to apply to Kerry College now: “There are no tuition fees on any full-time course at Kerry College. There are a range of grant and funding options. Applicants should know that course capacities are lower for some courses which means fewer places are available. The message is: Don’t Wait - Apply Now.”
• Clash Road, Denny Street and Listowel campuses run to the academic year. New courses now start on 21 September. Registration week begins Monday 14 September.At Monavalley campus, courses start
year-round. Interviews have started for courses scheduled to start next month.
• You can browse and sign up for all courses online: https://kerrycollege.ie/ full-time-courses/
• LESS BLENDED LEARNING, MORE ONCAMPUS, SMALLER CLASSES
• Kerry College plans is to have learners on-campus every week for full direct delivery.
• Daily start times and break times will be staggered.
• Many class sizes have been reduced to comply with social distancing.
• Additional resources are in place to ensure as safe a learning environment as possible.
• RANGE OF FULLY FUNDED EDUCATION & TRAINING
• There are no application, tuition or material fees for any full-time Kerry College courses.
• A 130 euro course acceptance fee applies for courses for progression.

• Applicants may be eligible for one of 3 funding options: SUSI Grant, Training Payment or Back to Education Allowance.
• Learning supports will be available.
Kerry College offers over 100 full time courses across its campus locations in Tralee at Monavalley, Clash Road and Denny Street and at Listowel. These courses include: Applied Science, Social Studies,
Culinary Arts, Nursing, IT Support, Animation, Music, Computer Game Design, CAD, Engineering, Business, Medical and Office Administration, Healthcare, Pharmacy Sales, Physiotherapy, Outdoor Activity Instructor Training, Sports Nutrition, Pre-Teaching, Pre-Law and Pre-Garda Studies and Pre-PE Teaching amongst others.
For queries, contact Celine or Meaghan on 066-714 96 96.

















As students settle into the new school year, third- and fourthclass pupils and their teachers in Kerry are encouraged to explore the world of engineering by taking part in the STEPS Young Engineers Award.
Now in its third year, the STEPS Young Engineers Award encourages students to develop creative engineering projects that could help to improve their local community. The award is one of four primary and post primary student engineering initiatives coordinated by Engineers Ireland’s STEPS programme -
funded by Science Foundation Ireland, the Department of Education and Skills and industry leaders ARUP, ESB, Intel and Transport Infrastructure Ireland (TII).
Participation in the primary school competition has doubled since its inaugural year, with over 200 schools submitting over 600 entries into last year’s competition.
Dr Ruth Freeman, Director of Science for Society, Science Foundation Ireland, commented: “SFI are proud to support the STEPS Young Engineers Award. Thank you
WELL DONE to Tralee man Des Grace whose greyhound ‘Pestana’ broke the world track record some two weeks ago with a time of 28.99 and on Saturday night last ran another brilliant race in a time of 29.15. He has had three successful wins now and is the favourite to win the Irish Derby which takes place in Shelbourne Park on Saturday fortnight (19th Sept).



to the teachers and volunteer engineers who take part and spark a curiosity in students during these formative years that could end up being a lifelong interest or career choice for them. We encourage third- and fourthclass teachers to participate in this year’s competition and look forward to reviewing
the students’ creative and innovative project entries.”
For more information on the STEPS Young Engineers Award, visit: https://www. engineersireland.ie/Schools/ Get-involved/YoungEngineers-Award
Sandy Feet Fitness are hosting an Open Day on this Sunday 6th September from 12pm - 4pm in Camp , next door to Sandy Feet Farm . Come along and check out what they have to offer in your local community They are providing a wide range of fitness classes to suit all abilities and fitness levels
Their brand new facility holds state of the art equipment ranging from Squat Racks to Skiiergs Get to meet your Head Coach and Manager Angela on the day They are looking forward to seeing you all *Please wear a face mask on arrival and adhere to social distancing guidelines*































We pick out some great photos posted on social media each week ...if you have any good ones please send them in... email traleeadvertiser@gmail.com or message us on our Facebook page... Enjoy !
Grace & Ingrid keep the walkers coming to Tralee!

Michael Mc Carthy with his brother Patrick and sisters Carol , Jacqui, Rosaleen and Colette as they celebrate his 60th in his nephews restaurant Gregorys Garden in Castlegregory last weekend .


“I just want to thank Nicole and Colm for being so kind and professional, I am from Kilkenny and was recently on holidays in Kerry and came a cropper with the worst tooth ache imaginable, not knowing the area I rang a few practitioners before I finally got some compassion from Nicole who obviously felt my distress and got me in straight away, from that moment until I finished there I cannot praise Bridge highly enough. Listen I wish you the best of luck and will never forgot how you saved our holiday.”
Seán Foxe

Evan from Tralee Sports Complex donating to Macs Mucklagh Madness challenge .His work colleague Ger Mc Donnell aims to complete an open water swim, without a wetsuit, shortly from Locke’s Beach in Fenit around Mucklahgmore Rock and back, a distance of 17kms . “This is for 2 local organisations who , like all charities , saw their fundraising abilities during Covid severely restricted “ says Ger . The charities are the RNLI and Tralee’s Mens Shed .

























CREATIVE ARTS
Animation
Ar t, Craft & Design (Por tfolio Preparation)
• Broadcast Production Skills
Computer Games Design & Development
Digital Marketing & Sales
• Digital Media Production Skills
Introduction to Radio Broadcasting
Journalism for the Digital Age
Multimedia with Graphic Design
Music Per formance
Music Technology
Photography
• Radio Production & Digital Journalism
• Tattoo Ar tistr y
BUSINESS, ADMINISTRATION & FINANCE
Accounting Technicians Ireland - First Year
Accounting Technicians Ireland - Second Year
Business Management
Business with Marketing/Administration
Business Studies
Legal Administration
Manual & Computerised Payroll & Bookkeeping
Medical Administration
Of fice Administration
Of fice Management (Level 6)
Pharmacy Sales Assistant
• Pre-Garda Studies
Pre-University Ar ts
Pre-University Law
Reception & Clerical Skills
COMPUTING & INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY
Diploma in Software Development - Full Stack (Level 6)
IT Suppor t Technician
Software Development

& BUILT ENVIRONMENT
CAD - Computer Aided Draughting & Design
Carpentr y & Construction Studies (PreApprenticeship)
• Civils for Fibre Insulation
Construction Ground Work Skills
• Fibre Installation Technician
• Overhead Lines Operative
Traditional Stonewall Construction
& CHILDCARE
Advanced Early Childhood Care & Education
Early Childhood Care & Education
Pre-Teaching & Education Studies
Special Needs Awareness & Assisting (Level 6)
Special Needs/Personal Assistant
Engineering & Electronic Technology
• Marine Engineering Welding
HAIR & BEAUTY
Beauty Therapy
Hairdressing
HEALTHCARE & SOCIAL SCIENCES
Advanced Social Care with Counselling Studies
Applied Social Studies
Applied Social Studies with Psychology
Healthcare Suppor t Assistant (Carers)
Nursing Studies
Nursing Studies with Maternity Care Skills
Pre-Emergency Care Studies
Social, Health & Community Studies -
Healthcare Suppor t (Level 6)
HOSPITALITY & CULINARY ARTS
Hotel and Catering
• Inland Angling Guiding
• Marine Angling Guiding
National Tour Guiding
Professional Cooker y
Regional Tour Guiding
• RPL National Tour Guiding
• RPL Regional Tour Guiding
SCIENCE AND NUTRITION
Applied Science
Animal Care Assistant
SPORTS, PHYSICAL THERAPY & COACHING
GAA Coaching & Spor ts Development
Outdoor Activity Instructor
Outdoor Activity Instructor (Advanced)
Personal Training & Nutrition
Physiotherapy Assistant Studies
Spor ts & PE Pre-Teaching
Spor t, Recreation & Exercise
Sur f Instructor & Beach Lifeguard
TRANSPORT & LOGISTICS
Bus Driving - D Licence Code Y23
Heavy Goods Vehicle - Ar tic
Heavy Goods Vehicle Driving (HGV) - Rigid
PATHWAY PROGRAMMES
Deciding Your Future
ECDL - European Computer Driving Licence
Food Preparation & Cooking (Culinar y Ar ts)
• UNIQUE TO KERRY COLLEGE
Courses are offered subject to demand and applicants meeting entr y requirements.
Limited places available on cer tain courses



Tomatoes oh lovely tomatoes!! So versatile, fresh and tasty .This time of year local tomatoes can be sourced from the farmers market in Tralee, in the Brandon Car Park every Saturday morning or from your local veg shop such as Horans Fruit & Veg. They are absolutely amazing . Here is a dish that’s fantastic with them. I buy the “once upon a cheese ricotta” made locally by Max at the market!
PEPPERS Serves 4
• 2 slices of sourdough bread, cut into 1/4-inch cubes
• 9 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, plus more for drizzling
• 4 firm-ripe medium tomatoes, top 1/2 inch cut off and reserved
• Sea salt
• Pepper
• 1/2 medium onion, halved and thinly sliced
• 1/2 glass rosé
• 8 ounces baby spinach
• 4 ounces fresh ricotta cheese
• 3 piquillo peppers, drained and diced
• 1 1/2 ounces freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese
• 1/4 cup chopped basil
• 1/4 cup chopped parsley
• 1 garlic clove, minced
• 1/4 teaspoon minced thyme
• 1/4 teaspoon minced rosemary
• 7 pitted kalamata olives, quartered lengthwise
• Pinch of piment d’Espelette
• Baby rocket, for garnish

Preheat the oven to 150 On a rimmed baking sheet, toss the bread cubes with 2 tablespoons of the olive oil. Bake until golden and crisp, 8 to 10 minutes. Let cool. Leave the oven on. Using a medium melon baller, scoop the inside of the tomatoes into a small gratin dish, leaving a 1/4-inch wall on the sides. Lightly sprinkle the inside of the tomato cups with salt and drain upside down on a paper towel–lined plate. In a large nonstick pan, heat 2 tablespoons of the olive oil. Add the onion and cook over moderate heat, stirring occasionally, until softened, about 5 minutes. Add the rosé and cook until almost completely evaporated, about 5 minutes. Scrape the mixture into a medium bowl and wipe out the pan. Heat 1 tablespoon of the olive oil in the pan Add the spinach and cook over moderately high heat, stirring, just until wilted; transfer to the bowl. Add the ricotta, piquillos, Parmigiano-Reggiano, basil, parsley, garlic, thyme, rosemary, olives and piment d’Espelette. Season with salt and pepper. Set the tomatoes in the gratin dish in their juices and stuff with the ricotta filling. Bake until the tomatoes are softened, about 20 minutes. Set the tops on the tomatoes and bake for 10 minutes longer. Using a slotted spoon, transfer the stuffed tomatoes to a plate; cover to keep warm. Transfer the cooking juices to a blender and add the remaining 1/4 cup oil; puree until smooth. Strain the sauce into a small saucepan and season with salt and pepper. Simmer over moderately low heat, stirring occasionally, until slightly thickened, about 10 minutes. Spoon the sauce into shallow bowls and set a stuffed tomato in each one. Garnish with the croutons and rocket, drizzle with olive oil and serve
Let me know if you enjoyed them and we will continue our healthy eating next week and remember to send your questions to: askchefnoel@hotmail.com

Recipes by










Good form starts with the pelvis and the bottom. Keeping your posture in form has everything to do with how you are balancing your body on your feet between both hips.
There is a big di erence in keeping your body exible, strong and tall the right way or the wrong way. If you are using your ligaments (the wrong way) or if you are using your muscle activity (the right way) to support your body. How much mobility and ease you have when you move is linked to how engaged you hold yourself.
We can all choose one over the other, but my work and experience have shown me that the active use of posture is something we generally have to work with to improve its form.
What we can and can't do when we move is directly linked to what our posture can and can't support.
There are many ways to move correctly, no matter what activities you enjoy doing. If your pelvis is actively engaged, you are going to walk, run or move well and riskfree.

Good posture it’s a good bit more than merely following the advice of pulling your belly in and bringing your shoulders back.
This advice is well-intended, but it's not what you should do to keep good form.
It takes too much e ort and does not engage the deeper core of our kinetic chain, the interlinking system which makes our body move.
Good posture is a combination of hard tissue (bones and joints) being positioned well, and soft tissue (muscle and fascia) supporting that. Our nervous system then gives the signals to move and engage.
Try this to engage:
If you stand without having your shoes on, feet hip-width apart. Ask yourself to feel where your weight is balanced? Then imagine a string extending from your pubic bone to the back of your head pulling you tall as if you were a puppet on a string. Now imagine that your front rib cage is closing like a double-sided door that was open but now needs to be closed to keep the draft out.
Do you feel taller now?
If so, you have taken the rst steps to actively engaged with the form of your posture.
"We have been receiving a lot of inquiries about a full-time school service over the past few days and have made a few decisions. We would like to help all affected students. We understand that some students have been informed that they no longer have places in their old school, others cannot go back to their old schools for a myriad of other reasons and a sizable few find themselves without a school next week.
We have been in contact with all concerned parties and can give the following updates.
1. Brookfield College has closed and will remain closed. All deposits and fees are secure and will be repaid.
2. The Department of Education and our local Minister for Education cannot help with the situation. The closure of a fee-paying, private school is not in their remit.
3. We, at The Scotia Academy , are seriously exploring the possibility of providing a Day School Service starting by the end of the month, if not earlier. We have located a suitable premises and can ensure the highest quality of service. We need to know what kind of market is there for Scotia Academy to deliver this service . We are not Brookfield College and do not pretend to be an automatic or natural alternative. We intend to enhance further our own existing reputation and extend our levels of trust even further into the parent /student community .
4. To this end, we would like to invite any and all interested parents and students to our Open Evening on Tuesday 8th September, from 6:00-9:00 pm at our current premises in Moyderwell, Tralee. Please let us know in advance if you are attending so we can organise a time-slot suitable for you . Just text us on 085-8277464 or 085-2786179. We will welcome all potential Leaving Cert Repeat students also. We may not be able to offer a 5th Year option unless we attain a minimum number of interested students, so please make sure to come if you are interested.
5. We will be able to make a decision on that night if this is plausible or even possible to achieve
6, We will continue to offer our usual evening grinds service to our loyal and regular students. Without them, we would not be here at all.
7. As an option, or last resort, we will organise a fully online LC option for students who have no other options but to homeschool.
8. This is a mess that we could all do without. The timing is awful for everyone. We are also mindful of the fact that the lockdown may be coming back very soon and we all need to have a plan for this. All of our classes will be available to all students both fully online and fully on-premises as a rule, so you will be covered either way. Scotia Academy are experts at delivering our courses and subjects online as we have been doing this in tandem with our normal classes since 2010. We are delighted to have very happy students and glowing references. We will give a demonstration of our online system and app on the Open Evening. We will also give a presentation of our plans for your students.
9. Fees will be discussed on the night and value for money will be at the heart of our pricing model.
10. Teas, coffees, and light refreshments will be available ."
We look forward to meeting you on the night,
Patrick & Annette Hurley

Third Level grinds in a range of Subjects

Tralee's newest choice for Grinds!
Please see our subjects available for Secondary School students
SUBJECT YEAR DAY TIME
Maths HL (Group 1) 6th Monday 4:30-5:30
Maths HL (Group 2) 6th Tuesday 7:30-8:30
Maths OL 6th Tuesday 6:30-7:30
Maths HL 5th Monday 7:30-8:30
Maths HL 3rd Tuesday 5:30-6:30
Maths 2nd Tuesday 4:30-5:30
Applied Maths 5th Monday 5:30-6:30 and Saturday 12:00-1:00
Applied Maths 6th Monday 6:30-7:30 and Saturday 1:00-2:00
Physics 5th Tuesday 4:30-5:30 and Sunday 3:00-4:00
Physics 6th Tuesday 5:30-6:30 and Sunday 2:00-3:00
























I hope you’re all having an amazing week
I want to give you all the positive vibes this week!
I don’t really have a title or a way to phrase it. But I’ll just jump in and hopefully you’ll get what I’m talking about…
As a woman, the beauty industry can be a number of things - Amazing, Interesting, A Hobby, A Career… but also - Stressful, Confusing, Pressurizing.
There’s SO many products being thrown at us EVERYDAY to make us look “perfect”, “flawless”, “snatched”. There are hundreds of thousands of Instagram accounts of Makeup Artists who look this way. Many women “won’t leave the house” without some form of makeup on. Not because they want to do their makeup, but because they don’t want others to see them without it.
I’ve realised many things, that Makeup shouldn’t be a mask or
something you NEED to wear. For me it’s something I love doing. I put it on if I feel like putting it on, but I also have no problem going ANYWHERE bare faced. I didn’t always have this mindset, remember, I grew up with acne - my life goal was covering that all up!
I realised also that photos you see… ANYWHERE, are art, not a representation of being “Perfect” or “Flawless”, because nowadays, photos are taken with professional cameras in good lighting and most of the time there’s at least 1 if not 47 filters or edits on that photo.
I also realised, on the total flip side - that makeup shaming is a thing… “She wears too much”, “she’s not natural”, “she doesn’t look like that without makeup”... WHO CARES!! If someone wants to put time and effort into there face, who are you to judge it? Maybe Makeup is their way of expressing themselves? Maybe putting on their makeup with music


blaring is their form of relaxing, blocking out the world. Or maybe they’re insanely talented? Why is that a bad thing?
My point is… nobody should be made feel they can’t go somewhere without makeup or that they wear too much of it.
If you spend your time worrying about someone else’s face, you need to find a hobby.
Just do whatever feels right for you, do a full glam if you want, go bare faced if you feel like it. Just try not to get down in yourself about someone who looks “flawless” on Instagram.
Confidence is literally one of the most beautiful qualities a person can have. So once you’re doing whatever you’re doing because YOU want to and it makes YOU feel good, you’re doing it right!
BE YOUR OWN BIGGEST FAN IN 2020.
If you wanna keep up with me on social media, you can find me on INSTAGRAM - @rebeccashortt TIKTOK - @rebeccashorttt
YOUTUBE - Rebecca Shortt








I hope you’re all having an amazing week.
I want to inspire other people to get fit and help them realise that being fit can look so different for each individual. That things don’t have to be done exactly the same for everyone, everyone is their own person and has their own body - so it’s important that we all realise what works for one person, is not going to necessarily work for someone else and their lifestyle.
I think it’s very important to have a healthy relationship with foodForming a healthy relationship with food takes conscious effort, but it is possible. This relationship includes relaxed eating, choosing preferences over positions, and practicing balance and flexibility in your eating. I don’t see any food as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and you will NEVER hear me say the phrase ‘Oh I’ve been so bold recently’.
Why? Because I eat for my goals, I eat for pleasure and I eat without guilt. If I choose to eat something, why would I feel guilty for that choice? It makes no sense to me.
I am currently tracking my macros (Protein, Carbs & Fat) and daily
calories. I know how many calories I should have in a day to be in line with my goals and progress in the gym, and I know how many of those calories should come from protein sources. I am aware of hitting my protein target everyday so I make food choices based on that, because it’s what my body needs.
If I want to go out for food, I will. But I will also make sure that during that day I will eat high protein meals so that I am in line with my target. If I want a John Doughs Kinder Bueno Doughnut, I will have one. Will I have one every day? No. Why? Because when you don’t restrict yourself from certain very high calorie foods, you don’t want them everyday.You get to a place of balance and eating foods that will enhance your training at the gym, your workouts and will give your body the fuel it needs everyday.
Life is too damn short to feel guilty about a

cookie that you deprived yourself of for two weeks and then finally ate. IT’S A COOKIE. I promise, it’s not something to feel guilty about, nor is any food.
If you feel you have a negative relationship when it comes to food, please seek the help of a reputable professional.
I personally recommend Recalibrated Bodies online coaching.

If you wanna keep up with me on social media, you can find me on























Three of them face the ultimate judgement. They’d have been sent to hell but turns out they did their share of good in their lives. So they face the last test. The alcoholic is given a bottle of Brandy, the drug addict given the stuff he digs and the smoker given a pack of cigarettes. Each of them are to fight the temptation for 3 days. The addict ends up taking the drug in the first day itself, the alcoholic takes the drink on the second day, both of them are immediately sent down below. The third day goes by, the pack of cigarettes is still untouched. An angel comes down on the third day and goes “ I see you’ve passed the test” The smoker goes, “ well I can’t chew the cigarettes, you forgot to give me a bloody lighter.”
Convention.
The leader says, “We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?”
A blonde gingerly works her way through the crowd and steps up to the stage.
The leader asks her, “What is 15 plus 15?” After 15 or 20 seconds she says, “Eighteen!” Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then 60,000 blondes start cheering, “Give her another chance! Give her another chance!”
The leader says, “Well since we’ve gone to the trouble of getting 60,000 of you in one place and we have the world- wide press and global broadcast media here, gee, uh, I guess we can give her another chance.”
So he asks, “What is 5 plus 5?” After nearly 30 seconds she eventually says, “Ninety?”
The leader is quite perplexed, looks down and
just lets out a dejected sigh -- everyone is disheartened - the blonde starts crying and the 60,000 girls begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, “GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!”
The leader, unsure whether or not he is doing more harm than good, eventually says, “Ok! Ok! Just one more chance -- What is 2 plus 2?”
The girl closes her eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, “Four?”
Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 60,000 girls jump to their feet, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream... “Give her another chance! Give her another chance!”
An aide comes into the Oval Office and says to Trump:
“Sir, three Brazilian solders were killed in Afghanistan last night.”
Trump looks absolutely devastated, nobody’s ever seen him like this. He sinks back in his chair, saying “oh my god” over and over. Then he composes himself and says: “Okay. Just remind me, how many are there in a brazillion?”
ON THE PRESIDENT. TRUMP IS CONVICTED OF TREASON. HE IS ‘HUNG BY THE NECK UNTIL DEAD.’ MIRACULOUSLY, MINUTES AFTER HIS HANGING, HE WALKS OUT OF THE GALLOWS AND ADDRESSES THE PRESS:
“Fake noose, folks.”
Know any funny Jokes? Share with us - send them to traleeadvertiser@gmail.com














Minister for Education and Kerry TD Norma Foley welcomes the grant allocations for Active Travel and Climate Change Adaptation measures under the Government’s July Jobs Stimulus Plan. These projects, which will be implemented this year, include the construction and improvement of footpaths, cycleway works and works associated with improving accessibility. The projects approved for funding include schemes aimed at alleviating flooding to roads and property, schemes involving works to improve embankment stability to prevent slippage, schemes relating to essential road repairs associated with severe weather and to undertake bridge strengthening and repairs.
Under the Active Travel Allocations, Kerry received a combined total in excess of €1.9m for projects located in Tralee, Killarney, Listowel, Castleisland, Kenmare, Ballybunion, Ballylongford, Ballyheigue and Kilgarvan.

In the Climate Change Adaptations funding announcement, Kerry received €698,500 with projects located in areas such as Waterville, Ardfert, Knockanure, Kilgarvan, Lispole, Killarney, Tuosist, Causeway and Tralee.

























Japanese car giant Toyota is working on an electric vehicle battery that it says would allow a car to drive 1,000 km in normal driving conditions.Last week, Hyundai demonstrated that an unmodified standard spec Kona Electric with 64kWh battery could drive 1,000 kilometres – but only in contrived conditions that limited the speed 30km per hour on average for the entire trip.
Now, according to a report in Asia Nikkei, a team of researchers from Toyota and Kyoto University is making solid strides in developing the next generation battery technology which has the potential to pack much more energy into a small lightweight packaged than today’s standard lithium-ion batteries. The Toyota electric vehicle battery in question uses a fluoride-ion chemistry, otherwise known as FIB, that it says could have 7 times the density of current chemistry used in electric vehicle batteries.
Additionally, the new technology is said to last around 8 times longer than current batteries although it was not clear how many cycles this means..This could lead to do to developments to smaller and lighter batteries with the same range as current lithium-ion cells or with batteries of the same size leading to a significant increase range.According to the report, the researchers opted for a solid electrolyte instead of the liquid one that is normally used in lithium ion batteries.The reason for this is because solid-state batteries are generally much less flammable (and according to this recent research can even be “fireproof”) than current lithium-ion battery chemistries, and are therefore considered significantly safer.The news is significant because in the arena of electric mobility, Toyota has done little on pure battery electric cars and is best known for its hybrid vehicles such as the Prius, and it has also invested a significant amount in hydrogen fuel cell technology.While it unveiled an ultra compact battery electric vehicle at the Tokyo Motor Show in 2019, and has inked deals with China’s BYD to develop electric vehicles, it does not today it have a single production electric vehicle on the market.In Australia, Toyota is now selling more hybrid vehicles than ever before. In July, 40% of all vehicles that Toyota sold in Australia were hybrid, including four out of five RAV4 SUVs.Toyota has previously said it would not sell electric vehicles in Australia in the future because it believes they are too expensive for the local market.However, rumours of two new electric vehicles that may be forthcoming from Toyota that have been hinted at in patent sketches that were filed in China.
One of the first jobs that new Jaguar Land Rover boss Thierry Bolloré will have to get to grips with when he starts next month will be what to do with Jaguar.Some contenders for the CEO role mooted ideas ranging from killing or selling the brand to focus solely on Land Rover, to closing the Castle Bromwich plant and moving production abroad. But Auto Express understands that Bolloré will have a bold new plan in front of him that centres around Jaguar becoming a fully electrified brand to compete with the likes of Tesla and Polestar. Central to that plan is a compact model designed to take on the Model 3.Sales of the all-electric Jaguar I-Pace are going well, following its success as Auto Express Car of the Year in 2018 and World Car of the Year in 2019. Meanwhile, Jaguar has confirmed that the replacement for the flagship XJ saloon, which is set to arrive next year, will also be fully electrified.
Castle Bromwich will become the home of electrified Jaguars, with the large J-Pace electric SUV due to be built there, too, alongside a new, as-yet unnamed more roadbiased Range Rover.But it’s the prospect of smaller, all-electric Jaguars that is most exciting and relevant, with an all-electric replacement for the XE saloon a strong possibility, as previewed in our exclusive images. Sales of the XE collapsed by almost 28 per cent in the last financial year, which has prompted a radical overhaul to boost sales.
The plan for smaller, electrified Jaguars does have support at board level, with JLR’s director of engineering, Nick Rogers, telling us: “A small electric Jag would be great –we need to think about that.
“That’s a really cool space that ideally we want to be in, and ideally our customers want us to be in – and it’s extremely relevant at this time.”The success of the Tesla Model 3 across the world – outselling both the current Jaguar XE and XF combined – hasn’t gone unnoticed at senior levels within JLR, while bosses have also been keeping a watchful eye on Volvo’s all-electric offshoot Polestar and its new Polestar 2 model.So an all-electric saloon – in effect a baby brother for the new XJ – is said by insiders to be very much on the cards. As with the XJ, the all-electric XE would likely make use of JLR’s new Modular Longitudinal Architecture (MLA) and – as with the Model 3 and Polestar 2 – sit slightly higher off the ground than a traditional three-box saloon to allow for extra space to accommodate the batteries in the floor.



















ST BRENDAN’S CONTINUE TO FLY THE LOCAL FLAG IN THE COUNTY CHAMPIONSHIP:
With Tralee’s clubs going out early in the Garvey’s Senior County Championships the attention locally has turned to the St Brendan’s Board Divisional Board. This is made up of Churchill, John Mitchell’s, Na Gaeil, St Pat’s and Ardfert and now they have a chance to knock out the reigning champions East Kerry and reach the decider.
St Brendan’s started their campaign with a win over West Kerry in the 2020 Championship which as we all know is knock-out. Next up was a trip to Austin Stack Park to face the Legion in a game that they won a little easier that even they probably expected. The game turned in favour of the Divisional side in a two minute spell when goals from Jack Barry and Diarmuid O’Connor set them on the way to a 2-17 to 1-09 win. St Brendan’s led from early on and were 0-06 to 0-02 up at the water break and with the two goals they had built up a 7 point lead at the break 2-07 to 0-06. The Legion tried hard but there was no way back and a place in the semifinal was secured. For St Brendan’s O’Connor ended with 1-03 while Ivan Park hit 6 points with 3 from frees, Jack Barry hit the goal while Alan O’Donoghue and Michael Kelliher both hit two points each while O’Dwyer, Fitzgerald, McCarthy and Myers all ended with a point each. Going into the weekend East Kerry were hot favourite to retain their title and while they might still do so they were certainly shown to be vulnerable when they only say of St Kieran’s late on 2-13 to 1-14. Kerry star Divid Clifford hit the vital goal with 5 minutes to go and while St Kieran’s levelled Paudie Clifford hit the winner. But then East Kerry were hit with a big blow when David Clifford was sent off getting a straight red for an off the ball offence. Unless East Kerry can find some very strong mitigating evidence their star man will miss the semi-final. On the other side of the draw Dr Crokes will face Mid Kerry and it is a brave person who will now call a winner. These very exciting ties will be played over the weekend of September 12th and 13th. St Brendan’s have certainly become one of the sides that are now talked about of reaching the business end of the Garvey’s County Championship each year. This was not the case some years ago but a lot of work has gone into their set-up both a senior and underage level.
Manager Seamus Murphy and his backroom team will have the side fully ready for the challenge and we wish them the best of luck in their bid to reach the biggest local game of the year.
AUSTIN STACKS NEWS:
The club continues to remind parents of its Juvenile players that they must be aware of the Covid protocols before coming to training..
The u6’s train as normal this weekend while for the u8’s the Bracker O’Regan, Kevin Barry and Jimmy Barry Cups are in full swing. It is a busy time for this age group as they welcome Milltown this Sunday.
For the u10’s the John Galvin, Garry Fernane and Paddy Drummond Cup are beginning this week. They will also welcome Milltown this Sunday with more challenge games over the coming weeks. The three u12 teams are continuing their Leagues while the u14’s defeated Glenflesk in a very high quality game. The u14 B’s went down narrowly to Knock/Brosna and both teams play Gneveguilla in their next game. The u16’s train at the normal times for their League campaign.
PARNELL’S NOTES:
The senior Camogie side put in a big effort away to Causeway in Round 2 of the County Junior competition. There was not a lot between the sides but the North Kerry girls experience and bigger squad saw them over the line. The club is now looking forward to the County Junior Camogie final when the two sides meet again. This is set for September 6th and the game continues the growth of the adult camogie game in the county. The countdown has begun for Sunday’s Intermediate County Championship clash of the senior men’s team with Kilgarvan. The game will take place in Lewis Road in Killarney with 2pm throw-in.
In the underage section the u12 girls lost to Causeway in a game that turned into a cracker despite having to be stopped at one stage due to torrential rain. In the end thanks to a late goal Causeway won 5-04 to 5-02. In u12 hurling the club is fielding two teams with some players from the younger age groups gaining great experience. Both sides went down to Crotta on this occasion. The play Ballyduff and Ballyheigue B in their next games.
The u14’s went into their game away to Kenmare with a point to prove after two losses and they put up a huge score against their hosts. They play St Brendan’s next. The u16s got their revenge for a defeat to Abbeydorney/ Casueway a few weeks ago by defeating them with 6 points to spare.
ST PAT’S NOTES:
The club Lotto was back and there was no winner of the draw from the numbers drawn 9,17,22 and 28 and the next jackpot this Sunday night will be e2,100 with the draws taking place in the clubhouse.
The sun shone for an enjoyable morning of games for the u6’s and u8’s with Churchill visiting to play the latter. They also brought their u10’s and both sets of players had a very good run-out. The u12’s just lost out to Gneeveguilla and are away to Duagh this Sunday. The u14’s lost away to Waterville and played Renard in midweek. The u16’s have resumed Phase 2 of the County League this week with a game at home to Tarbert.
The Senior B’s are at away to Churchill in the County Junior Football League Round 2 tonight Friday from 6.30pm. The club is thrilled for member Seamus Murphy and his St Brendan’s squad on reaching the County Championship semi-final.
KERINS O’RAHILLYS NEWS:
The club’s underage teams enjoyed the visit from Na Gaeil u8’s and u10 girls and u8 boys to Ballyrickard. All the children had great fun and the Academy sessions, like all in the clubs, are fully compliant with all the GAA Covid protocols.
The u12 Girls are looking forward to their away game this Saturday when they take on Annascaul in the North Kerry Shield. Their busy week continues when the girls are away to John Mitchels in the Town League Round 1.
The aim of the Town League is to provide girls from each age group with more football and all the clubs thank Eddie Sheehy from Na Gaeil for organising this for the Tralee clubs. The u14 girls were unlucky to lose out in a high scoring encounter at home to Abbeydorney in Round 3 of the County League Division 2. They play Churchill in the Town League. The u16 Girls welcomed Legion and the win sees them share top of the table with Moyvane both on 8 points from 10. The minor ladies defeated Churchill in Round 5 of the League while the Senior Ladies went down to Ballymac. In the Boys the u12’s went down to Annascual/Lispole and the u14’s were winners of a 10 goal thriller 5-22 to 5-15 while the u16’s game against Glenflesk was postponed.
Lotto – there was no winner of the Lotto from the numbers drawn 9,16,25 and 31 and the next Jackpot will be e4,600.
SUCCESS ON THE RACE-TRACK:
Tralee jockey Bryan Cooper chalked up another win this week when he was on board The Sliding Rock in the Mares Maiden Hurdle in Wexford. The winner was trained by Gordon Elliott. Dingle’s Paddy Kennedy was also in the winners enclosure riding Rapid Response for Jessica Harrington while Killarney based trainer Ian O’Connor saw his charge Ramiro win at the Curragh.
SOCCER CORNER:
The Denny Premier A title will be going to Killarney again this season as it’s Celtic and Athletic who will meet in the decider this Sunday sadly behind closed doors at Mounthawk Park. The last time the sides met in a reply for the League title the ground was packed and a riot of colour. In the Denny Division 2B final there was no luck for Lizard Wanderers who lost out to MEK Galaxy B but they will be happy with promotion.
Classic FC ended their season with a loss to Killarney Celtic in the Greyhound Bar Cup semi-final, The Tralee side have turned their thoughts to next year and have announced
that they will again have 3 teams in the Kerry District League – a great achievement for any club.
Classic FC PRO Tommy Naughton has announced the management makeups with Martin Sweeney. Graeme O’Sullivan and Mike Conway taking the A’s, Tadgh Healy, Shane Fitzgerald and Kieran O’Regan the B’s and Brendan Smith, Timmy Lynch and Damien Reid the C Team. The club will hold a club registration night in the coming weeks with membership for the season being e100 with an additional e20 in February. Student membership will be e70.
There was more good news for the Tralee Pitch and Putt club this week with three members qualifying for the National Strokeplay finals. Killarney’s Damien Fleming took the first spot as he looks to defend his title. He was followed into the finals by County Board Chair James Dignan, Alan Hobbart and Jason Creganwho was doing his late mother Christina, who only passed away last week, proud. Tralee’s Keith O’Brien took a place in the Intermediate section while his club mate Pa Fitzgibbon led the Junior qualifying where he will be joined by Brian Moynihan along with 8 other Kerry players. The finals take place in Collins, Cork with the Juniors on September 19th and the Intermediate and Seniors on the weekend of the 26th and 27th.
Sisters Ella and Sophie Moynihan met in the County u16 Matchplay Championship final on their home course. Ella got the win 3&2 on this occasion as she continued her good run which saw her reach the National Girls Matchplay final recently. This weekend the National Matchplay title is up for grabs on the Larkspur Park course in Tipperary. Damien Fleming is defending his title. Tralee players Alan Hobbart, Jason O’Regan and Micheal Conway are all in the same quarter of the draw with Darren Goodall in the top half of the draw. Tralee’s Lisa O’Connor plays in the Ladies Nett event which starts at Hillview in Clonmel and then moves to the Larkspur course for the concluding stages.
– MAINE VALLEY COURSE: In the SiComm Glazed Office Partition Singles the winner was Jimmy Foley on 40 points with Dermot McKenna second and Brendan Hickey 3rd and Joe Kennedy taking the Best Gross prize. In the Over 60 category the winner was John Carmody on 38 points.
Tralee GC: The Tralee Golf Club was delighted that its 17th Hole ‘Ryan’s Daughter’ has been selected in the Irish Independent’s Top 50 Holes in Irish Golf by golf writer Brian Keogh.














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Must promise publication of prayer. D.M.
Dear Heart of Jesus in the past I have asked for many favours, this time I ask you this special one (mention favour). Take it dear Heart of Jesus and place it within your Heart where your Father sees it, then in his merciful eyes it will become your favour not mine. Amen. Say this prayer three times for three days and your favour will be granted. Never known to fail. Must promise publication of prayer. M.H.
Dear Heart of Jesus in the past I have asked for many favours, this time I ask you this special one (mention favour). Take it dear Heart of Jesus and place it within your Heart where your Father sees it, then in his





























