PATTY

by patty hannum

I’VE BEEN FEELING A LITTLE CRABBY lately. Sadly, it is all self-inflicted. Still, it is always nice when you can shift the blame to a known or unknown person! So, what has me “wrapped around the axle” as my dad would say. A few things.

The Amazon app on my iPhone. I have a problem: my inability to stop ordering stuff from Amazon. I can’t tell you the last time I set foot in Target. No need—everything is available with a tap of your finger. Out of vitamins? Amazon. Out of Bounce? Amazon. Need waterproof pants for an upcoming trip? Amazon. It is too easy. I think of something, and the next thing I know, I’ve tapped the app, typed into the search bar and bought it! Usually with one click. Amazon has wisely stored my credit card information and address so I need to do nothing but hit ‘Buy Now’ and I’m done. It is embarrassing how many packages I find on my front porch. It is so bad that I look around my house before retrieving them to make sure none of my neighbors can see me. And each month when I get my credit card bill, I am met with pages of Amazon charges. Every once in a while, I decide I am going to try and match the charges with the items I bought, but instead, I make a fake promise to myself that this month it will be different. It never is. At least at Target, I was faced with an overflowing cart and could edit my purchases. Now, I feel bad about my addiction to the app and guilty when I see delivery trucks clog up the street every day—all because of my laziness. I just can’t quit you, Amazon!

A Free Little Library thief? As regular readers may remember, I installed two Free Little Libraries in my front yard. One has books for kids, and the other is for adults. I live in a neighborhood with sidewalks so nearly every day someone will stop, take a look and leave with a book. It brings me great joy. I love to read and want everyone else to love it, too! The libraries have been in place for more than a year, and people are starting to recycle their books, which is the whole point … to make it self sustaining. But over the past few months, I have noticed that some people are taking five or six books at a time. I fill the library up one day a week, and like clockwork, a small group comes by and overly helps themselves. Now, rational Patty sees this as just a cost of doing business, but irrational (or the unleashed) Patty gets downright mad when I spot a car pull up and help themselves to the entire content of the libraries. I swore to Carey the other day that I was done! No books for anyone! (Yes, a very Seinfeld reaction.) Then I think, maybe they really need all of the books, and I should just stop getting aggravated. It is a fun thing for me to do, but why can’t everyone play fair?

The Contemporary Art Museum St. Louis was awarded a $50,000 grant from Teiger Foundation’s Call for Proposals initiative. The funds will support the exhibition Paul Chan: Breathers, which will be on display at the museum next year from March 8 to Aug. 11.

You’re probably thinking, “Real rough life you got there.” The sentiment is warranted. Thanks for listening to me whine. I feel better, but I doubt you do.

Peace my Peeps. &