Project SOS: Share Our Stories

Project SOS:

Share Our Stories Capturing stories of resilience from seniors in the communities of Okotoks, Black Diamond, Turner Valley, Foothills County, High River and Longview

October 1, 2021

About

Project SOS: Share Our Stories

T he Town of Okotoks, in partnership with the communities of Black Diamond, Turner Valley, Foothills County, High River and Longview, came together on October 1, 2020 to launch Project SOS: Share Our Stories in celebration of International Day of Older Persons.

Our communities’ seniors were invited to participate in Project SOS by sharing their stories of resiliency and how they got through a difficult time in their lives. The touching, witty, heartfelt and often emotional stories of resilience not only tell of the challenges they’ve faced, but serve as valuable inspiration to anyone facing their own challenges.

Every Wednesday through the spring of 2021, Project SOS released new stories relating how community, friends, family, faith, independence and the kindness of others helped them through difficult times. The project concluded May 31, 2021, and the Project SOS committee is pleased to share the final collection of stories in this anthology.

We gratefully acknowledge the Okotoks and District Historical Society for funding the printing of this publication.

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Foreword

Here is a collection of stories submitted by our local seniors. They are real life experiences which reflect upon difficult, often harrowing memories and times. They show resiliency and the ability to bounce back, often turning adversity to advantage.

How did they push through the struggles, pain, losses and sacrifices to find hope and a meaningful life?

Our elders have shared much of themselves in their stories. We encourage you to learn from them, and find inspiration in their wisdom.

-Arlene Breadner RN, BscN, Age Friendly Okotoks Sub-Committee member

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Table of contents Resiliency from overcoming illness Chris Ptolemy: Road therapy............................................................................................................. 6 Sylvia Binkley: My life with bi-polar disease...................................................................................... 7

Resiliency from facing natural disaster Helga Seiser: Hope floats.................................................................................................................. 9 Margaret Michael: Quarantined......................................................................................................10

Resiliency from facing hard times Noreen & Elmer Milburn: Fools rush in...........................................................................................13 Elise Hache: A very lucky lady.........................................................................................................14 Barb & Hector MacDonald: Pancakes for every meal....................................................................16 Johanne Bodmann: Keep it together..............................................................................................17 Oscar Look: Rising up from a fall....................................................................................................18 Trudy Fransen: From Holland to Canada.........................................................................................19

Resiliency from starting over in a new place Susan Lelek: Tales of a midwife......................................................................................................21 Cal & Mary Annis: Opportunity for adventure.................................................................................22 Evelyn McClain: The life of a military wife.......................................................................................23 Carol McGreggor: My memories......................................................................................................24 Celia Dewane: My country of choice...............................................................................................25 Danuta Gruszecki: What will they do with us?................................................................................27 Mary Racz: Persistence pays off.....................................................................................................28 Elaine Webb: Hard transitions........................................................................................................29

Resiliency from losing a loved one Audrey & Tony Patterson: You come first.........................................................................................31 Mary Matwychuk: Life in a flower garden.......................................................................................32 Margaret Thiessen: Don’t run in the house!...................................................................................33 Vivian Wakelam: Out of the comfort zone.......................................................................................34 Elsa Faulkner: Half an hour late, but worth the wait.......................................................................35 Cover photo courtesy of Alexis Bohrson

Agatha Thiel: Happiness at Otter Lake...........................................................................................36 Bessie Jagbandhansingh: Independence, always..........................................................................37 Helen Cain: Always with you............................................................................................................38 Katie Mazurek: Family bonds..........................................................................................................38 Phyllis Gould: Serenity at the ranch................................................................................................39 Beverly Badke: Embracing life.........................................................................................................40 Colleen Thorn: Twice the love..........................................................................................................41

Resiliency from the community Mauna Minue: The giving spirit.......................................................................................................43 Norma Hamilton: Keeping the faith.................................................................................................44 Jean Herriman: Little Rascals.........................................................................................................45 Joan Weidenhammer: Winning their hearts....................................................................................47 Ethel Jones: Surrounded by blessings............................................................................................48

Resiliency from taking care of loved ones Lori Giesbrecht: Appreciating the good times.................................................................................50 Dorothy Yemen: Strength through supporting others.....................................................................51 Joyce McConkey: Keep calm and carry on......................................................................................52 Walter & Marjorie Danylak: Snapshots of our life...........................................................................53 Dawn Power: One day at a time......................................................................................................54 Donelda Yurko: Carry on the best you can......................................................................................55 Gabriella Enyedvary: Quest for freedom.........................................................................................56 Ron Lily: The passing of time..........................................................................................................57 Laura Hayward: History repeats itself.............................................................................................58 Audrey Abbott: A complicated relationship......................................................................................59

Resiliency from faith May Van de Wark: Should I stay or should I go?.............................................................................61 Audrey Gasser: Welcome to success..............................................................................................62 Ellen Haglund: Faith and family to carry you through.....................................................................63 Lena Hughes: Mission accomplished.............................................................................................64 Norman Johnson: The Viking...........................................................................................................65 Helen Dinner: Share love with the world.........................................................................................67

Photo courtesy of Gita Grahame

Resiliency from overcoming illness “Life can sometimes kick but you have to kick back.”

What does it take to make it through living with a disease or illness? Sylvia and Chris share their stories about how you sometimes need to hang in there and carry on.

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Chris Ptolemy Road therapy

On Halloween of 2008, my wife passed away at

the age of 45 from ALS, or Lou Gehrig’s disease. I had three daughters I was left to raise on my own.

My occupation was as an ‘over-the-road truck driver,’ which necessitated being gone from home anywhere from two to three weeks at a time. In my career as a driver, I travelled over five million miles. The girls were independent but became more so, very quickly.

Being on the road was good therapy from such a tragic loss. I was able to talk to many people about my life.

In 2012, I was diagnosed with MS and the debilitation of the disease left me unable to continue in my chosen career. Two years later I was no longer able to drive at all. In 2015, I was confined to a wheelchair and moved to the Heartland. Several of my friends from work fundraised and purchased me an electric wheelchair.

Lessons that I learned were many. One must live to survive. Tragic loss does not have to mean life stops. Life can sometimes kick but you have to kick back. I would recommend that if life gets you down, it is necessary to stay happy and appreciate what you still have. One never knows when the next event will take something away. Everyone comes with an expiration date so celebrate each moment and the people whose lives matter to you.

My hopes for the future are special times with my daughters and maybe one day grandchildren will be in the picture.

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Sylvia Binkley

My life with bi-polar disease I am a manic depressive. I have been one and anguish that the disease creates.

since I was 17. I am now 81, so I have had a long run with the illness. I prefer to call it manic depression. Bi-polar just doesn’t cut it.

It does not describe the horror, the despair

Well-meaning people would offer help. They would say, “Buck up, you have nothing to be sad about.” And that was just it, you didn’t have anything to be depressed about. But you were profoundly so and there was no reason to be. Or, “Why don’t you go for a brisk walk and forget about your sadness?”

Those ‘helpful hints’ work well for a reactive depression, but not so for a clinical one.

A reactive depression is when one is reacting to a death of a loved one, a failure, or a disappointment. A clinical depression is caused by an imbalance of the chemicals in the brain.

Glenn Close, writing in the Huffington Post, says her sister Jessie lives with bi-polar disease and she is fighting to survive not only the disease, but the terrible stigma that surrounds mental illness. I have been hospitalized many times over the years. When we were taken on outings to the bowling alley or a picnic in the park, I would pull my collar up around my face, hoping no one would recognize me. I was always embarrassed by my illness. I never ever thought I would be writing about it.

And then I would swing into a manic phase. I would have untold amounts of energy. My thoughts were always racing and I couldn’t sleep. I was irrational. Once, when I was in the hospital, I thought I was going on a business trip with my husband. A woman in my ward had far nicer clothes, jewelry and shoes than I. So when she went out on a day pass, I transferred all her clothes to my locker. I thought this was perfectly fine, but she didn’t.

At the various hospitals I was given electric shock treatments, which worked sometimes and sometimes not. But the medical profession is struggling to come up with a cure and treatments to alleviate the pain.

If I were asked, “how did you cope?” there is not much you can do. You just have to hang in there and remember that it does end. I found doing crosswords or knitting helped me focus.

And it does end! Just be patient.

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Photo courtesy of Shane Richardson

Resiliency from facing natural disaster “When disaster comes your way, don’t lose hope, and help each other persevere.”

Helga and Margaret never gave up hope as they faced natural disasters head-on. Their stories share how they made it through the unexpected with the help of family, friends and strangers.

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Helga Seiser Hope floats

The flood of 2013 - my journey of resilience. The flood was the most difficult time in my life.

I was continually amazed at all the help I had and all the goodness it brought out in people. I feel it brought out the very best in so many people. My message for others is that a disaster or a pandemic brings out the best in some and the worst in others.

You lose everything you have in your life within an hour. My husband and I were rescued by boat. When I asked my rescuer how he was doing, he replied, “My house has been flooded and I do not know where my wife is.” He was out helping others despite what was happening in his own life.

When it was our turn to be transported to safety we asked him to take our neighbour who had a broken arm and a dog. Our neighbour had almost drowned as he was impatient for the rescue. We were informed they were not allowed to skip a house because it was a methodical search to include everyone in a specific sequence.

Our house was deemed unfit to live in and we tried with great difficulty to find a place to live, but one after another closed because the water was still rising. We had friends that had been able to rescue their car and they offered to take us to Calgary to a hotel. When we arrived in Calgary, we found all available spots were booked up with victims of the flood.

I phoned a hiking friend and she took us in that night. We stayed a week with her and then luckily another friend sent out an email to fellow hikers saying we were homeless. Two or three friends responded to our call for assistance and we ended up staying with hiking friends close to Spruce Meadows. I wanted to be close to High River so we could oversee the restoration of our house.

My husband found the situation insurmountable. When we consulted with our insurance company, we were informed that they were not willing to let us hire a specific contractor to restore the house. I had to become the general contractor and hire specific tradespeople to do the restoration. My neighbour had hired someone to deliver a new furnace and I followed up with a phone call to this company. The owner was a lady. She was very organized and punctual and so I ordered my furnace from her as well. She told me that I needed an electrician and I used her contact. Each step from then on everyone got me through to the next step. It was a chain reaction that turned into recovery for our family.

The electrician told me that our fuse box was under water and the insurance would only

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pay for a repair not a replacement. He came up with a solution that had longevity for future problems. Everyone was so nice and so helpful.

My message: never give up hope - there is always someone who will help you get through a bad situation. We can all find resilience.

At the house we stayed in, I was asked to water the flowers. Each day when I returned from my daily trips to High River, watering the flowers gave a sense of normalcy to my day and helped sustain in me a positive attitude. Kindness by so many people during the day followed by taking care of the flowers at night gave me a routine and helped life continue.

I believe in hope - there will always be a brighter time - sunshine after a storm.

My hope for my community is that no one ever has to experience something like this again. I hope that adequate safeguards to the best of human ability have been put in place.

Margaret Michael Quarantined

The year was 1950; I was 13 years old, in grade eight, and attended Luxton School in Winnipeg, MB. Our school was situated near the Red River, so when the water ran over the banks, our school was closed. The students helped with the bagging of the sand bags, until the river overflowed. A warning to evacuate the province was announced over the radio.

My uncle (an air force pilot) and his family were transferred to a small place just outside of Montreal. My dad worked for CP Rail so my mom, two sisters and I rode the train for free. My dad stayed behind in Winnipeg and pumped the sheepish water that seeped through the sewer.

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Just before the flood, my dad bought a new house far from the river, so our house did not get flooded. The house we had moved from did. That was a devastating time for everyone, but people grouped together, cleaned up the mess and moved forward. A dam was built so that when the Red River overflowed again, it would never be that bad again. Winnipeg was such a beautiful place to live at that time.

In the early 1940s, my dad, two sisters and I came down with scarlet fever. My mom kept us at home and tended to all of us. She boiled and cleaned everything. A quarantine sign was hung on the front door of the veranda. The milkman left bottles of milk on the veranda, and the grocery store left the grocery bags full of food on the veranda. My dad paid for everything after the quarantine was over.

My mom, even after all that, never caught scarlet fever. While we were still in quarantine and feeling better, we were on the veranda watching the kids approach our door. It was Halloween and dark out, when they saw the sign, they ran away screaming. We never laughed so hard in our lives.

So remember when disaster comes your way, don’t lose hope, and help each other persevere.

Everything gets better with time. When things get tough, the tough get going.

I wish for the future that people should realize that we are all different and if we get to really understand each other, what an exciting world it could be.

I wish all sickness could just go away. The bats are immune from all the viruses we’ve had, why can’t we be immune as well.

I hope people will get together, visit each other at their homes instead of emailing them.

I hope the telephone will become a telephone not just for talking but to be used strictly for an emergency for all people.

Some day we will all realize that getting along together would make this world a beautiful place to live.

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Photo courtesy of Richard Hogan

Resiliency from facing hard times “With hard work, you will survive.”

Noreen & Elmer, Elise, Barb & Hector, Johanne, Oscar and Trudy may be from different backgrounds, but they all struggled to make ends meet in the early years of raising their young families or in their own lives. Read on to learn what helped them through the tough times and hardships.

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Noreen & Elmer Milburn Fools rush in

Elmer was born in Salmo, BC and Noreen was born in Nelson.

Elmer’s mother passed away when he was seven years old, and his father was in the armed forces. He was placed under the direction of social services and into the home of an elderly lady in Nelson.

At 15 years old, he began laying railway track for CP Rail and he turned over his cheque each month to his guardian. When he thought he had saved enough money to pay room and board to an aunt who lived in Nelson, he was ready to move out. Unfortunately, his caregiver had spent all the money from his paycheques that he thought she had banked in his name. He had no money in the bank to show for his hard work. His aunt allowed him to move in with her and he continued working for the CPR. Noreen and Elmer met through mutual friends when he was about 18. Noreen was brought up in a very strict but loving family and they would not allow her to date Elmer until she finished business school. Her father was with the RCMP and had very strong rules for behavior. Noreen was from a family of three girls, and Elmer was indeed the “candy kid.” He was the son they never had.

Elmer was invited for Sunday dinners and ate with a great appetite as his aunt was not a talented cook. They drove to Trail to pick out their engagement ring and when Noreen showed her mother, the response was, “Do not do anything else foolish for a while.”

They married in 1953, bought a car brand new, sold the car, bought an older house and had two sons. Elmer managed a welding supply company and they were transferred many times within BC. When the children were old enough, Noreen worked as a paralegal. Those were rough years moving constantly and making ends meet. They eventually followed their son to Didsbury as “family was everything and we wanted to be close.”

They survived the hard times by taking in boarders to help financially. Noreen fed them three meals a day and did all their laundry. As a gesture of appreciation for being so well-cared for by the Milburns, the boarders would sometimes babysit the boys so Noreen and Elmer could go square dancing. The boarders also loved to watch their TV. The secret to their resilience was the role modelling Noreen’s parents provided. Her parents were always supportive and loving. Noreen and Elmer had faith, they were very frugal with 13

their money and hardworking in all aspects of their life. They surrounded themselves with friends and were good friends to others.

“Love is the key, and celebrate your family. Get along with each other even if you do not have the same beliefs. Strive for peace, harmony and good health,” says Noreen.

Noreen’s hopes for the future are to be placed on her son Christopher’s mantel beside Elmer, and then eventually to be buried side-by-side in her mother’s gravesite in Nelson. Noreen and Elmer were married for 65 years.

“Close friends make the music sound sweeter, the wine taste richer and the laughter ring louder.”

Elise Hache

A very lucky lady I was born on April 1, 1933 on a tiny island on the

north shore of New Brunswick to a Catholic family with 12 siblings. I was the fourth from the bottom.

The family farm provided all the food we needed, plus we kept sheep, cows, chicken and geese. In short we never went hungry. The sheep provided us wool that my mother carded herself. I still remember her spending hours on the spinning wheel. She knit us mittens, socks, hats and warm sweaters; whatever was needed.

Oh I can still remember the wool was so rough and so itchy.

We had to help out on the farm so we were up early to do our chores and then walk two miles to school, no matter the weather. It was the same when we got home. The work seemed endless. It is strange that we were a happy hardworking bunch. This made us tough, honest and selfsufficient. The country school was so small, the bench went right around the wall with a potbellied stove in the middle of the room. It was always cold. We could never get our feet warm in the drafty room. The bathroom was an outhouse which you may find funny but back then it 14

was no joke when you had to climb a snowbank in very cold weather to go to the bathroom.

We had the best childhood, being raised on the shore of a harbour where we could go digging for clams, oysters or whatever fish our nets would catch.

We were poor, so as soon as we were old enough, we had to leave home to earn a living. My sister and I ended up in Montreal. I was 15, my sister was 17.

I got a job in a zipper factory where I was paid $0.88 cents an hour. This was enough to pay rent on a small room but not much left over for food. I remember we had to wait for the bus at the corner where there was a beanery. To us, it smelled heavenly. At night they would let us come in and eat crackers and tomato soup that we made out of a mug of hot water loaded with ketchup. Imagine two little farm girls scared and hungry in the middle of a large city. We had each other and we toughed it out. We were full of hope for tomorrow.

We both got married very young. My husband joined the army in the medical field. I helped him study, and by the time he got his internship we both knew the books by heart. Being an intern, he was in demand and we had to move almost every two years. Both my daughters were born on the road, so to speak. One was born in Germany and the other in Montreal. We both worked very hard trying to get a better life for ourselves. I was so grateful to get a job at the post office. I received a pension that I am now able to enjoy in my later years.

My husband suffered from an accident that left him in a wheelchair for the last 10 years of his life. We were married for 42 years. He passed away at the same time that I found out I had breast cancer. I was able to fight my way through two types of cancer. All I have left are three sisters out of this large, loving family.

My advice is never give up. Fight on. I now live in a seniors’ lodge where I try to fit in. It is always hard to make new friends. I have been here three months and because of COVID-19, still fighting to find my way. I am not a quitter. It is so nice to sit at a meal that I did not have to shop for, plan or cook. Let’s not forget about no more washing dishes.

My health is good and I look forward to many peaceful years enjoying my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. There is nothing sweeter than to hear, “Hi granny.”

The lessons I would like to pass on: Keep joy in your life. Don’t forget to laugh, dance and act silly at times. Be kind and generous. Volunteer your time. Develop a good sense of humor and a sense of adventure. Develop good friends – life is so much easier with good friends. When life delivers a blow – fight back. Never give up. Get an education – you will need it as it will help you to get a good job. You often hear that money isn’t everything but take my word for it – it helps. Education is the key. Always, always be kind to others. Help the less fortunate.

And some day if you are lucky you will find yourself living next to someone like me.

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Barb & Hector MacDonald Pancakes for every meal

Barb and Hector were born in Saskatchewan and

raised on farms. Hector was one of 12 children including nine boys and three girls, and Barb was from a family of four. Barb’s family emigrated from England and Hector’s parents emigrated from Scotland. Hector’s father was a bricklayer and he knew little about farming. Both families, while living in the UK, had read about the golden opportunities of coming west and what Canada had to offer.

When they arrived in Canada, times were very tough and money was in short supply for everyone. The government at that time did not provide any subsidies to struggling families learning how to become farmers. Getting enough food on the table to feed a family of 12 was difficult. Hector went to work at 14 years old as a hired man for neighbouring farmers to make money to help support his large family. Barb finished grade 10 by babysitting the teacher’s children. In exchange for the babysitting, the teacher gave private tutoring to help Barb in her schoolwork. The teacher encouraged her to further her education by going to a boarding school in Battleford for $33 a month, which included housing, food and education.

At 16, Barb and Hector met. That fall Barb was hired by a neighbouring farmer to do all the combining of his fields, working seven days a week until every field was completed for the grand total of $300. On rainy days, Barb fenced, stretching barbed wire on the posts. This was followed up by a job as a telephone operator, and Hector and Barb started dating.

Hector worked in the oil industry and as a truck driver, and Barb took on office positions.

They married in 1957 and began life in Weyburn, Saskatchewan and later moved to Calgary.

Raising a young family and making ends meet was often difficult. Memories in the early years include eating pancakes three times a day to stretch the food budget. They believed in each other and loved the life they were creating for their children. They were resilient together and faced life head-on as a team. This year they were able to celebrate 63 wonderful years of married life. It has been a journey that has brought much happiness to them despite health challenges. They have four children, 11 grandchildren and many great-grandchildren.

Patience with each other and the belief that if you worked hard you would be able to better yourselves was a paramount goal. It was crucial as the key to overcoming difficult times.

Family was everything, and education was very important to ongoing success.

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Barb and Hector believe it is vital to be your own person and follow your intuition. Live your life by what your heart tells you. Keep your sense of humor and be willing to laugh together.

Do not compare yourselves to other people and use common sense.

Hopes for the future: continued good health, special times together as a family and to celebrate the many happy moments life brings.

Johanne Bodmann Keep it together

My husband arrived in Canada in 1951 and I arrived from Germany in September of 1952.

My husband had been a POW in England and the US and had picked up some English, but I could not speak a word and neither could my daughters. He was employed in Calgary as a bricklayer. The children learned how to speak English in school and on playdates, and I learned from them.

It was very difficult to find housing. We secured a one bedroom suite. We added to our family with two sons and one had many health problems. Health insurance was non-existent and the financial strain of his surgeries and medication was overwhelming. My husband eventually had his own brick company and then specialized in fireplaces. I was a nurse in Germany and when the children became older, I worked as a healthcare aide in a nursing home.

I believe I was able to overcome the hard times and be resilient because of the way I was raised. I was taught to never give up and say lots of prayers. I had a wonderful marriage and my husband was very supportive. I had to keep it together for him and our children.

My message to future generations is to stay the course and do unto others as you would like them to do unto you. Love has no colour. Everyone is deserving of kindness.

My hopes for the future are that COVID-19 ends. I would like my great-grandchildren to have social opportunities with friends and a complete life away from technology and out in the world. I also wish for them an attitude of never giving up. I am 94 years old and there is still so much for me to learn, see and do. I have a beautiful family and I want to be a part of their lives and their future for as long as I can. I want to live my life to its greatest potential.

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Oscar Look

Rising up from a fall Oscar was born May 2, 1928 in Romania. There were five boys in the family, and Oscar

was the second oldest son. His father was a finishing carpenter that made specialty items like baby cribs and furniture. The whole family came to Canada in 1958 and his father continued in the carpentry business. Oscar worked in many areas but primarily became a plasterer. He married his wife Elvira while in Germany just before they came to Canada.

Together, they had three boys and one girl and settled in Calgary.

In 1951 Oscar broke his leg in two places. He fell from a scaffold on a construction site. He ended up on workman’s compensation for two years.

“The plank gave a little and I gave a little and kerplunk. Off I went,” says Oscar.

This was very difficult with four children and financial responsibilities. His family helped him out as much as they were able to do so but they had their own families to care for as well.

Oscar says his secret to being resilient is to maintain your energy and your will. “You may have to struggle but you can get through almost anything. It takes a long time to heal when you come across adversity like an injury.”

He said it was years before he could walk properly again. It was hard to not be able to do the things he had previously enjoyed and to learn that this was his new reality.

Oscar’s message for future generations is, “Take it easy.”

“Do not be in a hurry to embrace life - have patience.” Oscar wishes he would have learned a trade and stuck with it, got his papers and had his own business.

“If you have patience with the trade you have got it made.”

Oscar thinks the secret to his long marriage was that each of them had their responsibilities - he took care of the next plastering job and Elvira took care of the home and children. He believes that coming to Canada gave him many opportunities, “the chance to grow and spread and experience life.” Romania was so poor - what the Germans did not take, Russia plundered. The government of Romania had no financial resources to help their own people, so families were constantly told, you must help yourself.

Oscar and his family had a strong belief in the message they heard from other people: Canada is a country where you may not become extremely wealthy, but with hard work you will survive. He believes Canada gave him the life he would never have had otherwise and is incredibly grateful. “Young people today just need to keep plowing on and they will have a great life.”

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Trudy Fransen From Holland to Canada

I was born July 7, 1939 in Holland. During my

childhood, I had to face many challenges. We had to evacuate from our home by the sea because of the war with the Germans. My dad bought a three-storey house on a nice street that had a hedge full of pink roses around the fence. The Lancaster bomber dropped food for us, sometimes all we had to eat were tulip bulbs. We were sure glad when the war in Holland ended.

We immigrated to Canada in 1951. We came by boat and train. The boat ride lasted about a week and was terrible. My mother and I were seasick for most of it. We were sure glad to see land. My mother’s brother lived in Lethbridge, AB and sponsored my dad for a job. My brother and I had to stay with a Dutch family because my uncle did not have enough room in the house for us.

First my dad worked in a coal mine in Blairmore. We lived in a basement suite. Then dad took over a welding and blacksmith shop in Foremost. We lived above the welding shop. To get to the outhouse you had to walk from the upstairs where we lived through the shop where the farmers were and then head outside to the outhouse. I also had to carry the slop pail to the outhouse after supper.

My dad had to leave that job and we had to work topping beets and picking corn. It was a very hard job. I missed a lot of school. My mom was sick a lot of the time and I had to do most of the housework. I helped out in the shop sometimes as well. I had to leave school when I was 16 and began cleaning houses. I married at 18 and moved to Calgary. I continued cleaning houses. They were very large houses and it was hard work, but I was proud of the work I did.

It felt good to see everything clean and shiny. Getting to the houses was a challenge because I sometimes had to take two buses to get there. These were just a few of the challenges I faced. I went through a divorce and the death of my husband and daughter. Having my faith and attending church helped to keep me going. I also attended a grief support group which I found very helpful. My advice to the younger generation would be to do everything to the best of your ability, never give up and don’t be afraid to ask for help.

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Photo courtesy of Girania Finley

Resiliency from starting over in a new place “Look at the doors that open and be willing to take the chance to step through that door and be interested in the world.”

Relocating can be tough. Whether it’s moving to a new city, province or country, it takes resiliency to adapt – just ask Susan, Cal & Mary, Evelyn, Carol, Celia, Danuta, Mary and Elaine.

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Susan Lelek

Tales of a midwife Susan was born in Kent, England in 1939. Her father had a

manufacturing business specializing in bar equipment, and she had a brother and sister. She lived in the most bombed village in England during the war, Farningham, a village of about 1000 people. The village was situated directly between France and London in the flight path and frequently the bombs would miss London and hit Farningham. Luckily, despite the heavy bombing, no one lost their life.

When Susan was 18, she left her village to take her nurse’s training at St. Georges Hospital, High Park Corner in London for the next three years. She extended her education on to a fourth year specializing in midwifery.

Susan traveled to Toronto to visit her aunt with a girlfriend. Once there, she was enticed to the prairie provinces and met her husband John at a dance in Medicine Hat. Her girlfriend returned to England, and Susan stayed for the next 50+ years. Her husband was a rancher and they eventually settled north of the Red Deer River in the Cessford area. She loved the prairie lifestyle, being independent, working with cattle, and the vast expanses of land around.

Susan had a very interesting career as a midwife filled with varied experiences often of an emergent nature. The women who came to her were often facing high-risk deliveries. The midwives had to be able to deal with anything and quickly. They traveled to private homes to assist in deliveries of varied complexities. She recalls being a student nurse and being urgently called to the bathroom to assist a woman who was imminently delivering into a toilet, then traveling by taxi with a distressed newborn baby to a hospital in London. The work entailed long hours under often stressful conditions and the outcome was not always positive.

Susan was young, energetic and enjoyed learning. The position was challenging and interesting. She continued in her career when she came west. Midwives were not as well recognized in Canada as they had been in the UK. Susan was calm and very knowledgeable.

This helped her survive and overcome the difficult times.

Susan believes that resilience comes from confidence and learning to become self-sufficient.

Her hopes for the future are to see a world at peace. She believes in helping her two daughters, Tracy and Kim, and her son Shawn. She wants to always be there for them. She has lived a great life, and a long life, and wishes that for her family.

“Enjoy what you do and reach out and help others.”

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Cal & Mary Annis Opportunity for adventure

Cal was born in Nova Scotia, and Mary was born in

Ontario. They met each other in Lethbridge in 1974.

Cal was a consultant with the Alberta Department of Education and Mary was a social worker with the Alberta Department of Social Services. Cal and Mary married in 1974 and helped raise two adopted children from Cal’s first marriage. They have been married for 47 years living primarily in the Lethbridge area and then retiring to the west coast.

A difficult time in Cal’s life was when he moved from rural Nova Scotia to the larger metropolitan area of Yarmouth to attend high school. This move involved him seeking room and board with a family. It created a whole new life experience for him that shaped his future.

His mother was very determined to have her children expand their education, and as a result, all three of her children completed university. This was a result of strong family support and hard work by Cal being employed in various jobs to help pay the costs.

An instrumental portion of Cal’s life was a YMCA camp that his mother had heard about. He participated in it for over 15 years with duties that ranged from peeling potatoes to eventually becoming a counsellor and camp leader. The gentleman that ran the camp took a great interest in Cal, recognized his potential and became a huge mentor in the path that his life eventually was to take. Today he is still in correspondence with friends he met through the camp. The YMCA camp experience was a “miracle in his life,” as it provided a whole new world of opportunities. Cal states he has had many miracles in his journey and that he has lived a “great life.”

Cal’s lessons for younger generations about finding resilience include exploring your opportunities, taking advantage of opportunities presented and not being afraid to change your path.

“Look at the doors that open and be willing to take the chance to step through that door and be interested in the world. There is so much out there if you are willing to make the effort to seize opportunities.”

Cal’s hopes for the future include good health and the ability for him and Mary to participate in their interests. Cal hopes that young people today will get to live in a world that gives them opportunities and the abundance of experiences that his world offered.

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“Peace, good health and an adventuresome mind are key to success.”

Evelyn McClain

The life of a military wife Evelyn was born in Portage la Prairie, Manitoba in 1935. She

was the second oldest of seven children - six girls and one boy.

Her father was a mixed farmer and then he became a builder of houses in the town of Portage.

When Evelyn was in grade three, the family moved to Sioux Lookout, Ontario and her father ran a market garden. The family then returned to Manitoba and Evelyn began her first job as a telephone operator for Manitoba Telephone. There was a military base in Portage with many eligible young men and Evelyn and her girlfriends would go together to the community dances. The men would line up on one side of the room and the women on the other, and when the music began they would pair up for a swing on the dance floor. This led to Evelyn meeting her future husband Larry.

The first international move they made together as a married couple in the military was to France. Times were difficult. Evelyn was pregnant with her first son Gordon and they lived in a tiny apartment with coal supplies very scarce. Later they were able to move into PMQ (private married quarters) and Evelyn thought she was in heaven.

Their married life was a series of international moves from France to Cold Lake, Germany, Prince Edward Island, Montreal, and finally returning to Cold Lake until Larry retired in 1974.

Evelyn worked in each location doing a wide variety of jobs and explored diverse business opportunities with each needing unique skills. She supplemented the family income, maintained their home and raised five active children, Gordon, Shelly, Charles, Clifford and Shirley Anne. It was challenging to be a parent, a wife, an employee and constantly moving, finding new jobs and balancing a very busy life.

Evelyn found resilience through her deep love for her husband Larry and her great pride of his achievements. “He was a magnificent husband and father and always put his family first,” says Evelyn.

Evelyn has also found strength through the church and her strong faith. She has relied heavily on support from a broad network of coworkers and friends from all over the world in their travels.

Her hopes for the future generation are to learn from the past. Learn while you are young to respect adults. Try and be a good leader and example to others and provide support to those in need. Share your love freely and let people know they can turn to you if they need you.

Endeavor to have a strong work ethic in everything you do.

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Carol McGreggor

My memories When I thought about challenges faced in my life, I am reminded of the challenges I faced when moving to a new location. I was not familiar with any of the area and knew no one. The first move was about 80 miles from the small town I grew up in in Colorado.

I accepted a position as a secretary for the summer months at the Little King Ranch. This was a non­-paying guest ranch in the Colorado Rocky Mountains. The ranch was owned by King Resources, a Denver oil company. I stayed in a small furnished apartment. It took me some time to get acquainted with the 20-25 employees there. Twenty guests at a time would be invited to stay 3-4 days at a time. All the guests were from other areas and were potential investors for King Resources. It was a place where they could wine and dine potential investors. My job was to greet the guests and know something about them beforehand. The guests were so impressed with the first-class facilities and the many things to do while there. They always wanted to talk and ask questions. There were times where I was intimidated by them, but I learned that it didn’t matter where I was from (not coming from money, or whether I had a college education), what mattered most was my interest in people.

I always liked to know where they were from or what they were interested in. That job taught me a lot about myself.

The summer came and went and at the end of it, I was offered a position in the King Resources office in Denver. I indicated to the more senior secretary that I would be interested in transferring to one of the other locations and she offered me a position in the Calgary office. I spoke to the Canadian manager when he came down to Denver for a meeting about transferring. I discovered that they were in need of a new secretary and he suggested that I fly to Calgary to check it out, as I had never been to Canada before.

The next week, I boarded the company plane and was flown to Calgary. The Calgary office manager’s wife toured me around the city. While I was there, the manager gave me a tour of the office and I had a chance to meet some of the other staff. I accepted the job right then and flew back to Colorado to arrange the move. The first of October, I loaded my car up with everything, and my mom and I drove to Calgary together which really helped. Mom was able to look for an apartment for me while I was at work.

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I remember sitting in my small apartment a couple weeks after I moved, thinking, “What have I done? I’m in a strange town, in a new country with no friends or family!” Thankfully that feeling didn’t last long, as I became acquainted with the locals and soon had a very busy social life. I even joined the Professional Secretary Association and “desk and derrick,”

an association for people in the oil industry. After four years, the oil company began to have financial difficulties. The management group took a voluntary layoff.

Next I accepted a job at a resort outside of Vernon, BC. This move took me to the third location where I wasn’t familiar with the location or the people. This move was in December 1971. I had a wonderful life in the Okanagan. Over the years, I worked at many different jobs, got married, and had a son. I lived in the Winfield area until 2017.

This brings me to my last big move. I had fallen and broke my hip, which had restricted my mobility. My family convinced me that I shouldn’t live alone any longer. They got me into the Medicine Tree Manor, again I moved to a place where I did not know a single person. Looking back I recommend to be yourself, and be attentive when listening to other people. Getting involved in the activities is the best way to get to know others. Put on a smiling, happy face.

I keep trying new activities, even the ones I’m not good at, I keep trying. Be able to laugh at yourself. I will be 83 in two months, and I still enjoy meeting new people, trying new things, and keep smiling and having fun.

Thank you for the opportunity to tell a little bit about my journey to get here. I have enjoyed going down memory lane, remembering times that shaped who I am. Reading this, I can laugh at myself again!

Celia Dewane

My country of choice The year was 1950 when my parents immigrated to a new land, Canada. There were six of us that left Holland: my mom, my dad, my oldest sister and youngest sister, my brother and myself. My parents had sold their house, and the people who purchased it also purchased a German Sheperd dog that Dad had got for Mom when he was in the army.

Dad got the dog to protect my mom and sister, but things did not go well for the dog as he would not let the new owners into the house. Family members were called to assist, but the dog wouldn’t let anyone in. My mom was terribly upset when she got news when we arrived in Canada that her dog would not let anyone into the house, and therefore had to be shot.

Let us go back to when we were in Holland. I remember some family members coming 25

extremely late at night to say goodbye to us. It was an exceedingly difficult time for all of us.

After we said our good-byes, we were all loaded into some vehicles and taken to Amsterdam to board the ship Tabinta. The Tabinta was a converted cattle ship but that did not matter. It would take us to our new country and we were all excited about our adventure. I remember little about the journey, but I do remember my mom was very seasick so my dad looked after us older children, and Mom of course looked after my baby sister, who was three months old.

During the sailing part of our journey, I saw my sister trying to walk the rail so I ran to tell my dad. While I was running, a Negro gentleman grabbed me. I had never seen a Negro before.

I was very frightened so I bit him and started running again. I ran into something and cut my head open. Blood all over me, my sister walking the rail, my poor dad didn’t know what to do!

Someone offered my sister a candy, so she got off the rail and all I got was stitches. No one gave me a candy and I was the good girl of course. I still am the good girl.

We arrived in Ottawa, Canada, our new country. The Red Cross was there to help the people with diapers, milk and whatever else anyone might need. A doctor looked at my head but he did not give me a candy! Eventually we boarded a train and after a lengthy ride we arrived in Calgary where my dad’s employer was waiting to take us to the farm he would be working at.

The man put us children in a car then started loading the trunk with our belongings. Things went rather smoothly until he went to put a wicker-type basket into the trunk. My mom took it out, he put back it in. My mom took it out, he put back it in. My mom took it out and tried to tell him that there was a baby in it but he didn’t understand Dutch and my mom didn’t understand English. Imagine that man’s surprise when my mom took the basket and proceeded to take my sister out!

Things in our new country went rather smoothly. There were of course problems with getting groceries and other things we needed but somehow, despite the language barrier we settled into our new country, learned it’s language and customs. We all enjoy Canada and appreciate the freedom my dad and others fought for. I pray each one of you enjoy them as well. Yes, we love Canada our new country, our country by choice.

My advice to people immigrating to Canada is to learn the language and customs, how our government is elected and how it works for the people of Canada. Travel around Canada as much as you can and get to know all the provinces from east to west. Each province has it’s own history, it’s own beauty and it’s own unique places and people.

As you travel around Canada you will meet people from all over the world. Some will look the same as you and some will not. Canada accepts all people, no matter the colour or race.

As you travel, check out the historical sites. There is so much to learn from them about the people who first settled here, what type of homes they built, how they traveled, what they ate and how they farmed the land. You will be surprised as you travel the country of your choice, Canada, what you will learn about it, it’s people and it’s customs.

I have lived here for 70 years and am so grateful to Canada for accepting me as one of their own. I am so proud to call myself Canadian.

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Danuta Gruszecki What will they do with us?

Danuta was born in Poland in 1927. At the age of

12, she and her family were faced with the occupation of Poland by both Russia and Germany. One night, the Russian army loaded her family onto train cattle cars and took them to a camp very far away in the forest. They were put into small wooden houses with each room holding sometimes up to four families. Each day, Danuta and her family thought they would be killed. Each day, they wondered, “What will they do with us?” Danuta’s father was put to work cutting down trees in the forest, her mother prepared food for the prisoners and her sister was conscripted to lay down the wood for railway tracks. Danuta had to help take care of the little children while her family all worked. They were held in this camp for over a year and a half. Many people died of starvation or were sent to jail. When Germany invaded Russia, many Polish men were conscripted into the Russian army to help fight the Germans. In 1940, mass deportations began from eastern Poland and many people were taken away by train to work camps in Siberia. There, they died of hunger, from the cold or trying to escape. Polish prisoners were put to work on farms and in the mines.

In late 1941/42, Danuta’s family was able to join Polish soldiers heading for the Middle East.

This army was going to the Middle East to become the Polish Division of the British Army.

Danuta attended a British army school in what was then Palestine. She finished high school on a British base in Palestine. The Polish army was demobilized and her family was moved to England. The family did not want to return to Poland because of political turmoil, communism and because conditions were not safe. Danuta’s mother had a friend who lived in Canada, so as a family, Danuta and her parents moved to Hamilton. They looked for whatever work they could find and eventually they found a house they could buy and live in.

A happy occasion was when Danuta returned briefly to England to marry her husband, Stanley, whom she had met while he was serving in the army. Danuta and her husband had two children. She is now a loving grandmother to three grandchildren and a grandpuppy.

Danuta lived in Hamilton for over 65 years, and in 2016 at 89 years of age, Danuta moved to Okotoks. Danuta’s lessons for resilience are simple: just keep going each day and value your family. Her lessons for future generations are to make a decision where you want to go in life and then decide what you have to do to support this. Learn new skills and get good at them as fast as you can. Always work hard and do not pretend you know everything. It is not easy to accomplish your dreams as life is not easy. Stay happy and stay healthy and life will be good.

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Mary Racz

Persistence pays off Mary arrived in Canada from Hungary in 1957 with her

fiancé Charles. She travelled by train to Austria, then France, then by boat to Halifax, and then train once again to Calgary.

Mary was raised by her grandparents in Hungary as both her parents had become sick during the war; no antibiotics were available to them for recovery and they passed away.

Mary had trained to be a pediatric nurse in Hungary but felt coming to Canada was an opportunity for her and Charles to have a better life.

They arrived with the clothes on their backs and five dollars each that they received once they disembarked from the ship New York, which was owned by Aristotle Onassis. The ship had eighteen spots for refugees and Mary and Charles were able to secure two of them. There was no need for a suitcase as they had nothing. Mary experienced severe motion sickness on the ship and the train and felt she was ready to die.

The first few nights they stayed in supplied housing and then with a cousin of Charles’.

Charles was able to secure a job with CP Rail as a section man (in Hungary he had been a locomotive driver) and Mary became a cleaning lady for a doctor and his wife. The doctor’s wife was very kind and started to teach Mary English by identifying objects in the home. A shoemaker who spoke English and Hungarian also helped them by giving information on how to assimilate into the new world they were living in.

Mary’s jobs expanded over the years and included being a mushroom picker in Calgary, then a mushroom picker in Portage la Prairie; she made Sea-to-Sea dishes, was a cake decorator, picked beets and through this all raised a family of two boys and a girl.

When she and Charles returned to Calgary, they started up Professional Skate Service. This was a very difficult endeavor as no bank would give them a loan for startup. Mary thought, “If they close the door I will go through a window,” and she never gave up asking people.

Eventually she found a bank manager who had daughters that were figure skaters and understood the need for a skate sharpening service. The bank manager came to the shop they operated out of a small garage and visited. He understood practice schedules, time to and from arenas, and the coaching involved. He was able to help them financially to buy the equipment necessary to expand their business. Mary said she just had to be persistent until she found the right man that would support them.

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They came up with a business model that provided customer service that was unbeatable: picking up skates, dropping them off, giving customers home-baked goods and coffee while

waiting, being friendly and supportive, knowing names, perfection in the skate sharpening process and the business grew. Today it’s owned by her family’s third generation, her granddaughter and husband. Her great-grandson at 12 is already interested in the business.

Mary’s lesson of resilience is to be persistent in your pursuits. Never give up and always be positive. Mary and Charles were a team - he could do, make, fix, drive almost anything and she would do everything to support him and their new life in Canada. Mary encourages all of us to “pass on our experiences and help others. Remember to show your appreciation for opportunities.” She believes we should give all newcomers to Canada a chance and the opportunity they need to succeed. At the Heartland, Mary says, “We have many employees from all over the world - they are very hardworking and very kind. It is our responsibility to be kind back, not always in money but in time; a big smile goes a very long way.”

Elaine Webb

Hard transitions I was born in Darlingford, Manitoba and I lived there until I was 13 years old. At that time, my mother, who had been born in England, decided she wanted to move back home.

She had family there and she had not been back to see them since she had moved to Canada.

Our journey to Cheshire, England started by train from Darlingford to Montreal where we boarded a ship for a seven-day trip across the ocean. It was an adventure but at the same time I was incredibly sad to leave my home and friends in Manitoba.

When we first arrived in England, we stayed with family, and I was enrolled at a local school.

It was a huge culture shock moving from a small rural community in Manitoba to a large town and from a small school to a school with thousands of students.

At school, we were made fun of because of our accents. Also because of the negative attitudes toward Americans; we had to make sure they knew that we were Canadian.

Eventually we adjusted and made new friends, but it was a very challenging time in my life.

After I graduated, I enrolled in a four-year apprenticeship program for hairdressing. I was in the second year of my program when my parents decided that we were moving back to Canada. So, four years after we arrived in England, we moved to Calgary, Alberta.

Once again, I was leaving my friends and going through the hard transition of moving to a new place. I felt like I was shattered but at the time I did not feel like I had a choice, so I just made the best of what was a bad situation.

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Photo courtesy of Miguel Rigor

Resiliency from losing a loved one “Always believe in yourself and your capabilities.”

Resiliency can often come from the loss of a loved one. For Audrey & Tony, Mary, Margaret, Elsa, Agatha, Bessie, Helen, Katie, Colleen, Phyllis, Beverly and Vivian, their families, prayer and independence sustained them through the great loss of their parents, spouses, siblings and children.

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Audrey & Tony Patterson You come first

Tony was born in Gallahad and Audrey was born

in Calgary. Audrey was raised in “Little New York” or Longview and Tony in the Turner Valley/Stettler area.

They met each other in grade nine in Turner Valley public school and have been married for 68 years. Audrey worked in the oil and gas industry and Tony was employed by ERCB (Energy Resources Conservation Board). They raised three daughters, Cathy, Chris and Kelly, primarily on an acreage southwest of Turner Valley.

A very difficult time in their lives was when they both lost their mothers, Kate and Kate.

Audrey’s mother had diabetes and lost her eyesight overnight. She eventually passed away from complications of her diabetes. Tony’s mother had a heart attack. Tony and Audrey were both raised in a home where they were the only child, so this had huge impacts on their lives.

Audrey assisted her father with household duties and Tony worked alongside his father with horses, cows and managing the home.

Audrey and Tony believe their resilient lifestyle is a result of a very strong marriage and compatibility. They have lived a healthy life and made their relationship and family a priority.

They loved dancing on the weekends. Audrey was always able to support Tony in his love of horses and riding as she knew this was so very important to him to lead a rich and fulfilling life. Tony in turn gave Audrey his complete support in any decisions she made. They worked out together what came their way and always made each other come first.

Audrey and Tony’s hopes for the future include the desire that the education system for this generation will have the option to return to classroom learning. They believe that it provides stability and an important social function in growth and development. They both also have a strong hope that role models in sport and the fine and performing arts will have the opportunity to inspire young people. Their great-grandson Cohen recently shared with them that COVID-19 was seriously interfering with his chances to get into the NHL. Audrey and Tony could not agree more.

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Mary Matwychuk

Life in a flower garden Mary was born on a farm north of Saskatoon, Saskatchewan.

She had six siblings, three brothers and three sisters. Mary’s father was a very busy mixed farmer raising both cattle and grain. School for the children was five and a half miles from their home and they walked there and back until grade ten.

She married in her early twenties, raised two daughters in the Edmonton area - Terri and Cynthia, and has three grandchildren.

A difficult time for Mary has been the significant losses she has sustained in her immediate family. This included two brothers, three sisters, two husbands and her daughter Cynthia.

Mary feels deep pain with all her losses but also sees the blessings that each one of her family members has given to her. She believes that you need to keep busy, give to others through your time and charitable activities and recognize each day how very lucky you are to have health and happiness in your own life. She works hard at helping others find gaiety and laughter even if it means that “sometimes she needs to make a fool of herself.” Faith has also sustained her through many difficult times. Mary had a wonderful second marriage with Steve and together they traveled, played and embraced life to the fullest.

Mary is a strong believer that the little things in life make a big difference to let people know that you care: a birthday card, a kind greeting, a warm hello and maybe even a dance to music.

Mary’s hopes for the future include a world where there is acceptance of each other no matter where people come from or who they are.

“Remember that for all people, the world is more alike than different. Our hopes and dreams are similar - support the dreams of everyone.”

Mary feels that her family is amazing and so supportive, she is happy to live at The Heartland and embraces the community she lives in. “Life is like a flower garden - there are weeds here and there but I choose to look only at the flowers.”

Mary has lived in many places in her life and no matter where the road has led, she believes you can always find friends that make your life “bright.” The sign on her door reads “Spunky” and that is exactly what Mary is.

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Margaret Thiessen

Don’t run in the house!

I have had many challenges in my life, but have chosen just

a few to share with you. Many times during my early childhood years I avidly remember Mom saying “Don’t do that” to different things so as not to have injuries. This particular day though, I chose NOT to listen and I paid the price because of it. This warning was “DON’T RUN IN THE HOUSE!” I paid no heed and came running in the house, tripped and fell on our camp stove.

I had thrown out my hands to save myself and as a result both hands were badly burned, especially my fingers and my thumbs. The pain was excruciating. My dear mom soaked my hands in cold black tea for days. It helped immensely, and the blisters finally broke. To this day I have no scars and the feeling is good in both hands. Needless to say, I never ran in the house again. Lesson learned: please listen to your mom or dad, whatever the case may be.

Another incident that happened was when I was horseback riding with a friend in the hills. We reached a spot like a huge mud puddle, not deep or boggy, but my horse decided she was not going through. I thought I could persuade her, but much to my surprise, she defended her choice. She reared up and swung her head sideways catching me on the right temple. It didn’t knock me out but I went limp and flew over the back of the saddle landing at her back feet in the muddy mess. My nose was bleeding badly, and I was seeing double of everything. Once my nose stopped bleeding, I knew I had to get back on the horse for an eight mile ride back to camp. There was no road for a vehicle. I was terribly bruised, swollen and the right cheekbone was fractured in three places. I healed quickly though and learned a good lesson: trust your animals. They are wonderful creatures and so important in our lives. Maybe my horse remembered a traumatic experience as a colt in a similar area. I had no way of knowing. This was a learning factor and even though I was afraid, I had the want to ride again, and I did.

One of the biggest tragedies in my life was losing my beloved brother in 2009. Two days later, I was diagnosed with cancer. Not telling you this because I am sad, but more to let you know what you can endure if you have faith, strength and hope. My brother will be with me always with the beautiful memories I have of him. As for the cancer, I got through it all with my wonderful partner Leo who was so loving and supportive, along with family and friends who were always urging me on.

Today I live in Medicine Tree Manor among many others who share this lovely space. We have good food, good staff and lots of entertainment. What I have shared with you today has made me be a stronger, better person. Always believe in yourself and your capabilities. I am a senior who is enjoying my life in High River.

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Vivian Wakelam

Out of the comfort zone Vivian was born in a log house in the Moose Mountains

of Saskatchewan, the oldest child and only girl with three younger brothers. She was delivered by her grandmother and a neighbour at home. Her father was a mixed farmer, and later they moved into town and he worked for the Co-op.

She took her formal schooling in Arcola and later in Weyburn.

Vivian moved to Regina, married and had three children: two daughters and a son. Her husband was Cree and English.

Vivian lost her only son at the age of 17.

This was extremely difficult for their entire family to face such unbearable loss.

Vivian pursued a nurse’s aid program and worked on and off in the industry for the next 20 years - a career she thoroughly enjoyed.

Vivian chose to remarry in the late 70s. She and Don enjoyed many happy years together.

They loved traveling, hiking and exploring during the summer months. When he passed away after a lengthy illness, she felt surrounded by the compassion and caring of friends and staff at The Heartland.

Vivian believes the secret to her resilience has been a very strong faith. It has sustained her during difficult times. She also credits the support of family, friends and community as being very important. The Red Hatters ladies club provided a very important role. The opportunities for her in group meetings and their prayer group to share life experiences helped her to remain positive and optimistic. She was not alone. Public speaking proved to be a challenge as Vivian was very shy, soft spoken and quiet, but she “took it on and found the more I did it, the more confident I became.”

Vivian’s hopes for the future include always looking on the positive side and make your faith front and center. No matter what a person’s colour of skin is, remember we are all born equal and should treat each other with respect, dignity and kindness. Embrace new opportunities and change. Vivian even tried belly dancing - she was very intrigued by the genre and she loved it, even travelling to Egypt to learn more about the dance style.

Vivian has many surprises in store: “She may display her belly dance skills at a future talent show.” Her stage name is Zilla after her grandmother. What a wonderful way to embrace a new opportunity. Way to go Vivian!

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Elsa Faulkner

Half an hour late, but worth the wait Elsa was born in East London in an area called Wood

Green. Her father was a bus driver and was in high demand as a sergeant in the army training new recruits to drive military vehicles during the war.

Elsa, at nine years old, was responsible for her younger brother during the bombings in London. She had to get him safely into the shelters, along with her sister, while her mother had a new baby to care for. They eventually slept in the shelters during the evening, as the bombing was so heavy.

They moved briefly to Chesterfield in Darbyshire to escape the heavy bombing and all lived in one room with a very kind family. Eventually, when London became a safer location, they returned to their own family home. Elsa remembers the sound and sight of the Doodlebugs flying overhead and hoping they would not land on the area where they were living. Elsa’s mother was traumatized by having to raise her family under such severe conditions, and much of the childrearing fell to Elsa as she was the oldest. She eventually took a clerical job in a company doing income tax.

She met her husband initially as a “pen friend” while he was stationed in Singapore. When he happened to come to London, he telephoned Elsa and they agreed to meet at a tube station.

They were both half an hour late, but luckily enjoyed each other’s company so much that they continued to see each other. John was an easy conversationalist and they had lovely times together going for cocktails and to theatre productions. The romance blossomed, and Elsa’s mother adored John. They married in 1956 and had three children, a son Nicholas and twin daughters Emma and Abigail.

A difficult time in Elsa’s life was the loss of her beloved husband John and her son Nicholas.

Elsa has found the resilience to carry on through a move to Canada to have the support of her daughters; the loving connection and pride she has in her grandchildren; the peace she finds in her own company and personal interests - Elsa is content in her new life in Canada.

Elsa’s hopes for future generations are that her grandchildren are happy and get good/ fulfilling employment opportunities, find wonderful companions and have strong marriages, and that we all learn to be tolerant of each other and the world around us.

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Agatha Thiel

Happiness at Otter Lake Aga was born in Germany in 1930. She had seven

siblings and lived in a small village where her father had a textile store and sold fabrics and accessories.

Her formal schooling was in the village, and Aga pursued a career as a kindergarten specialist through a seminar run by Catholic nuns. Aga was employed by a successful farmer as the governess to his children. One day she went with him to visit the neighbouring farm and met the manager of the operation, Fred, and immediately fell in love with his blond hair and blue eyes.

They married and were together for over 60 years until Fred passed away.

Fred wanted to emigrate to Canada as he loved the farming way of life. This was a difficult process due to the war, but he was finally able to get his papers to proceed. Aga’s father would not let her join him until he had these things in place: a good job, living quarters, a medical facility with a doctor and a church for his beloved daughter. When Fred had everything set to go, he wrote a letter to Aga’s father and supplied photographs as proof that all preparations were set for her arrival. Aga had four large wooden crates in which she placed her trousseau - everything from clothing to bedding and mattresses for the journey.

Their first home was in Montreal as Fred already had a brother who lived there. They had to be married in six weeks or Aga would have been deported. Fred was employed as a landscaper and eventually owned his own nursery, “The Green Thumb.” They next bought a rundown country inn on Otter Lake in the Laurentians. “It was a beautiful setting on a tranquil lake with water like glass,” Aga said.

Aga did all the cooking and all the baking for their guests, and they employed local residents to help maintain the operations. They brought it back from ruin to be a very successful enterprise and ran it for 26 years. All three of their children - one son, Richard, and two daughters, Mady and Andrea - helped with chores at the inn and were integral to its success.

Richard became an hotelier and worked in many places, but came back to the inn and helped his parents at Otter Lake for the last ten years of their operation.

With the decline of her husband’s health, compounded by Aga losing her eyesight and beginning to deal with heart problems, the decision was made to move west to be closer to her daughters and under their loving care.

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Two of the hardest times for Aga were the loss of her husband and her son. She lost the two most important men in her life. Her two daughters have been unbelievable in sustaining her

through all aspects of her life and especially during her move to Okotoks and The Heartland community. She loves them with all her heart.

Aga has found resilience through the support of her family, her faith, nature and music.

Aga’s wish for future generations is to celebrate the world of nature all around you, enjoy and be thankful for family and friends, have a healthy and respectful life and love one another and take time for each other.

Bessie Jagbandhansingh

Independence, always Bessie was born in Trinidad and came to Canada 50 years

ago with her husband. They moved to Toronto, Ottawa and then Fort McMurray, where together they designed and built a beautiful log home. They had three daughters; one is living in Calgary and the other in New York. Bessie also has a stepdaughter in New York and a cherished canine companion in Calgary.

A really difficult time in her life was when Bessie’s husband of more than 50 years passed away from heart complications. Ultimately, this led to her moving to be closer to her daughter in Calgary. She chose to move into The Heartland so she had access to medical care if she needed it in the future.

Bessie feels some of the secrets to her resilient spirit lie in her ability to remain independent.

She has a very strong faith that sustains her and is a great believer in the power of nature and exercise. Family and friends are also very important to her and she works hard to maintain connections in this technological world. Bessie believes in the power of maintaining traditions, and dressing up is one of those traditions - she always changes into lovely outfits for special occasions and church.

Her hopes for the future include health and happiness for herself, her daughters and their families. She also hopes that young people today find marriages as strong as she had with her own husband and are as happy.

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Helen Cain

Always with you Helen was born in the Grace Hospital in Calgary. Her

father was a butcher and worked in a meat packing plant, and she had two older brothers. Helen attended Western Canadian High School and then the University of Calgary, finishing her degree in English at Simon Fraser. She married in 1965 and had a son and daughter.

Helen pursued a career in personnel and then moved into Human Resources for 13 years. She concluded her work life as a realtor for 15 years before retirement.

A difficult time in Helen’s life was the death of her son. He was playing a senior men’s hockey game at 11:00 pm and had an acute aortic incident. He was rushed by ambulance to the Foothills Hospital but did not recover. This was devastating to his sons, wife and Helen, as he was only 49 years old.

Helen found resilience through prayer, friends and family who really cared about her. She placed her focus on memories and the good times they had shared. She has a medallion with her son’s thumb print on it that she wears around her neck always.

Helen’s message for future generations is: whatever you do in life pick the right path - it may not be the easy one, but ultimately it is the best decision. Value the people in your life while they are with you and tell them that you love them. It is not the years in your life, but the life in your years. Thank you for what was, thank you for what is, thank you for what will be.

Katie Mazurek Family bonds

Katie was born in Belloy, Alberta. Katie and her

brother Edward were twins, and her father was a mixed farmer. She attended her formal schooling in Wanham, Alberta. Her husband Gene grew up 10 miles away from Katie and they were childhood sweethearts, they knew 38

each other their whole lives. Katie and Gene were married 59 years and had four children three girls and one boy, and now have six grandchildren and six great-grandchildren.

One of their daughters, Debbie, succumbed to cancer. This was a very difficult time for the family. Katie’s keys to resilience: love each other with all your heart. Faith is paramount.

Celebrate the strength of family bonds.

Katie’s hopes for future generations are that her grandchildren have good jobs and get a valuable education; that they have a strong work ethic; and that they all have good marriages with healthy children and are happy.

Phyllis Gould

Serenity at the ranch Phyllis was born on a farm near Odessa, Saskatchewan and she had four brothers. Her mother passed away after she was born; her aunt Julia raised her from a baby. She attended school in Odessa until grade nine and finished high school in Regina at Central Collegiate.

Phyllis met her future husband, Larry, at a dance in Regina.

Phyllis has three children: two daughters and a son. Two children live in Calgary and the third lives part-time in Mexico. Phyllis remarried a rancher named William, and they raised cattle seven miles southeast of Sundre. They ranched together for 25 years and enjoyed a great life together.

A difficult time in Phyllis’s life was when her husband passed away and her children did not want her living on her own on the ranch. This was when she moved into retirement living, and has been at The Heartland for the past two years. She has greatly missed the peace and the serenity of ranch life.

The key to her resilience has been music and entertainment, her family’s strong support and her faith.

Her messages for future generations are to try to be happy each day, be kind to one another and get a good education.

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Beverly Badke Embracing life

Beverly was born in Yorkton, Saskatchewan, one

of a family of five children and the youngest of two brothers and two sisters. Her oldest sister was 24 and getting married when she was born - that sister today is 100 years old and in perfect health except for hearing loss. Her sister Phyllis, at 18, was the next closest in age to Beverly and spent a great deal of time caring for her. It was quite a large age gap in the family.

Bev lived with Phyllis when Phyllis married, as her mother was not very well and unable to care for her. Her father had served in World War I, driving a team of horses delivering water to the soldiers. Bev’s mother was from England and one of the first war brides arriving in Canada. Bev met her future husband, Doug, when she was 15 and they were happily married for 54 years.

A great adventure Doug and Beverly had as a young couple was when they took the opportunity to work together for Manitoba Hydro on a dam project. Doug worked as a civil engineer, and Beverly as a secretary. The financial benefits of living so far from civilization set them up financially for their future life.

A very difficult time in Bev’s life was losing her husband to ALS and losing her sister Phyllis, whom she was very close to since childhood, the same year.

Beverly finds resilience through the love and support of her sons, Jeff and Brad, and through the optimism and hope she sees through the eyes of her grandchildren as they embrace life.

Beverly hopes for future generations that we get through the COVID-19 pandemic and history does not repeat itself. She wishes to extend her heartfelt appreciation to the healthcare team that has sustained all of us through this crisis. Beverly hopes her grandchildren have happy, healthy, successful lives and receive a good education and meaningful employment.

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Colleen Thorn Twice the love

Colleen was born in Hardisty, Alberta. Her father was a

grain elevator agent and her mother worked in the general store, and Colleen was an only child. Colleen attended the University of Alberta and achieved an education degree.

She married her husband Carmen and they had identical twin sons: Colin and Craig. Colin lives with his wife in Malawi, Africa and they teach deaf children. Craig lives in New York and is a top photographer.

A difficult time in Colleen’s life was the loss of her husband when the boys were16 years old.

Colleen later remarried and says she was lucky because she had “two perfect husbands.”

Colleen found resilience through her faith, the love and support of her children, and the support of extended family and friends.

Colleen’s wish for future generations is to get a good education, have work/employment that helps others and makes our world a better place, and travel as much as you can and experience different cultures.

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Photo courtesy of Dan Kurz

Resiliency from the community “Surround yourself with good friends, remember your blessings and try to keep busy.”

Community spirit helped Mauna, Norma, Jean, Joan and Ethel stay positive as they tackled the obstacles they faced and adapted to new situations. Read about how giving back to their communities helped them find resiliency.

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Mauna Minue The giving spirit

Mauna was born in 1928 in the High River hospital and

has lived her whole life in the Okotoks area. Her father was a farmer south of the town centre. She rode four miles by horseback to Cameron Coulee School until grade nine on some “pretty crazy horses”. Mauna went to high school in Okotoks and took her nursing education through the Holy Cross Hospital in Calgary. She met her husband Jim in 1942 in grade 10. He was six weeks late arriving for the school start up due to working the harvest and the war. They began dating and were married in 1950, settling on the Minue family farm.

In 1953 while pregnant with her second daughter Cherie, Mauna contracted polio. “I was isolated from my family and lived with my parents upstairs away from everyone. The next three weeks, I have no memory of my care or condition. Jim had a bed beside mine and took care of me, sleeping when he could. I was in and out of the hospital with pain until Cherie was born a year and a day after Louanna, my first daughter. This was a very difficult time in my life.” Mauna went on to have two sons in the next three years. She was a busy mom.

Mauna was able to overcome difficult times through the strong love of her family and support by the community. The Rockettes - a service group for women of the Foothills area - were very supportive. The Rockettes helped each other and those in need. It made a huge difference in the quality of people’s lives.

Mauna’s lessons for resilience include helping each other as much as you can and talking things out. “Talk to each other, share your problems and feelings. Give people a smile - it really helps.”

Mauna was a driver for people who needed cancer treatments and took individuals from the surrounding communities in to the Foothills Hospital. This service gave Mauna a great feeling of being able to help in her own way. Jim and Mauna gave a lifetime of effort to community service. This spirit of giving as a couple helped them develop resilience in their own lives.

Jim had a problem with alcohol, and when he held his first grandson for the first time it was the impetus to stop a habit that was affecting his farm, marriage and children. He never drank again for the rest of his life. Family was everything. He was also the officiant at the same first grandson’s wedding when he married, a very happy occasion for the Minue clan.

Jim was responsible for starting AA in Okotoks and Mauna started Al-Anon in the kitchen of the United Church. Although the meetings changed locations over the years to bigger venues, Jim and Mauna maintained their commitment to serving people and their loved ones with 43

addiction issues. Giving to the community was a huge part of creating resilience and coping with what life brought to their own family.

Jim passed away in 2017. Mauna says she is “putting along with life.” Her hopes for the future include helping her grandchildren pursue their dreams. She has a great-granddaughter that is an aspiring artist following in the footsteps of Mauna and her mother before her.

Mauna has 15 great-grandchildren, with another one on the way. Throughout her whole life she has been calm, positive, kind and totally engaged in meeting the needs of others. Mauna has always understood people change their behaviours on their own terms. She accepts everyone for who they are. Her love has always been given unconditionally, and in return she has been so well loved by those in her life.

Norma Hamilton Keeping the faith

Norma was born and raised in the Longview area.

Her father worked as a steam engineer in the boiler house for BA Oil, the drilling rigs that were in the area in the 1930s. Norma had one brother, Morley.

She completed her early schooling at Mercury School between Hartell and Little Chicago and moved to Vancouver for a year to escape the smell of sulfur that bothered her mother. The family then returned to live in Okotoks. She graduated from high school in Okotoks, and still has friends like Connie Hunt from those early days. Connie played piano and the girls all learned to dance in the science lab at school. Norma’s father passed away from cancer when she was 17. He was exposed to mustard gas in the war and later the sulfur gas from the rigs. Norma married and had one son and a daughter and now has seven grandchildren and six greatgrandchildren. She has a legacy of granddaughters to follow in her footsteps.

Norma was devastated by the loss of her father and learned resilience early on in her life.

She had a very close friend, Donna B., and her whole family took Norma into their lives. She spent time with them on the family farm. She was actively involved in the Young Peoples and CGIT group with the church and faith was important in helping her deal with her father’s death. Faith has been a huge part of Norma’s life from Sunday school as a child, to today when she attends church services at The Heartland and at the United Church.

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Norma’s lessons for the future include keep your thinking positive. Handle each day one at a time. Do not dwell on the “what ifs,” but on what can be done. Celebrate health - do not complain as you get old and your parts wear out; her great-granddaughter Lukah taught her that, as she is a miracle of survival in one tiny package.

Jean Herriman Little Rascals

After graduating from Olds School of Agriculture in 1947, I was approached to teach school at Sunset, a neat little school west of Nanton. There was a shortage of teachers because of the war, so I filled in as a correspondence teacher. There was a grade eight student and his sister in grade four, two grade ones and a couple of grade twos for a short while. I ran it like an ordinary school. I mailed out the lessons, followed them, mailed the answers back and so on.

The teacherage was attached to the school. It had a stove, wood and coal of course, a bed, a table and a couple of chairs. Perched on a hill with no one closer than a mile, I was pretty lonesome.

I think I must have driven myself up to take bales for my horse, get food and stuff for me.

From then on, I rode up except the one time I took a team and wagon with supplies. I’ll bet I could still harness a horse if I had to.

The kids of course rode horses. One time my family wanted to use my little Rosie and I was left with Knobby, the laziest horse ever born. One noon hour he was into his afternoon nap when I rang the school bell. He took off like a shot and went right through the barbed wire fence…. the fastest he ever moved in his whole life! We had the best laugh ever!

My sister used to ride him backwards and whack him soundly quite a few times to get him to trot off his lazy horse ramble!

Spring run-off was always a trying time for me as I had to cross a raging torrent of otherwise fast moving creek. I foolishly decided to go a different route and it was so deep that the water ran over the top of my saddle, I knew she had been swimming. We made it!

I had some rascals. Lawrence, my grade eight and Jimmy my grade one students. One day I was invited out to a couple’s home who had no kids. Those rascals came riding to their home and told us that Rosie was running south down the road. We cleaned up and the man of the house took me in his car down the road but there was no sign of Rosie. Those two rascals were buggering around. They stopped us and admitted they had stolen my horse. They tied her up in a bush close to the school. I don’t remember but I think they were pretty contrite. Or maybe they were worried what their parents would say and do.

One afternoon I was sweeping the floor. After using the dustpan, I heard a noise at the door.

Lo and behold there was Jimmy on his little pony riding right in and around the desks and out the door… laughing his head off!

At one noon hour I was in the teacherage and when I went to go to the school room, I couldn’t 45

get the door open nor the one to the outside. Those two rascals were at it again! They had somehow used their reins to tie up my doors. Didn’t take me long to get my butcher knife and push it through and hit leather…. didn’t take long for them to rescue their reins as they knew their dad would not take kindly to getting their lines wrecked.

The first night I was at the teacherage by myself, I heard a scratching noise off and on all night. I didn’t have a very good sleep. I went out fearful in early morning and checked around until I found the culprit. A piece of wire hung on a nail head and as the wind blew it scratched back and forth. Another time I heard noises like the scurry of little feet in the coal bin. Took awhile before I saw the rascal. A little chipmunk. When you’re alone everything looks big and sounds scary.

One day I decided to have a wiener roast. For some reason or other, one family came, and they so thoroughly enjoyed it as it was the first wiener roast they had ever been on. They used to have me down for a meal occasionally which I really liked. She was such a good cook with not much to work with.

She sent word to the school with her little girl. I for some reason said I couldn’t go. After school she came running back and said, “My mom would really like you to come! She swept down the cobwebs and everything!” I went!

I went to Jimmy’s and his little sister’s house once and stayed overnight. His mom made the best deer soup I ever ate. All her food was just so good!

There was a little girl that lived near Jimmy’s place. She was in grade one but for some reason the kids picked on her. After school I would make sure her coat and scarf were on and got her horse ready so she could get straight home. One day she came with a note from her dad. He wanted to know the names of the kids who cut her horse’s tail off! I didn’t know it happened of course and what could I do? Can’t glue a tail back on! I think I gave them a tongue lashing, can’t remember for sure but it seems to me that no one ever owned up to it.

Things weren’t all funny!

I used to ride home six miles or so, every weekend, leaving Friday and back on Sunday.

One Sunday there was a little green Ford parked by my school. I unsaddled and was putting my stuff in the barn and there was my boyfriend finishing off plucking feathers from a fool hen or prairie chicken that he caught in the barn. I think we had chicken pie for supper.

Another time he had been visiting and, on the way home, he met an obnoxious driver who didn’t dim his lights. He kept dimming his off and on and was completely deflated when the lights went flashing by….it was a train!

I finished that year and someone else took over. I made $900 and eventually bought a cow with some of that money. Her name was Topsy. Along with the pig my neighbour gave me the year before, I got married. She raised a few babies for us.

I kept in touch with Lawrence and Jimmy until Lawrence passed away. I haven’t heard from Jimmy for awhile, must fix that!

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Joan Weidenhammer Winning their hearts

Joan was born in Milden, Saskatchewan and was the only

child in her family delivered in a hospital; her other five siblings were home births. Her father was a farmer. She attended grade school from grades one to 10 at Glenhurst. She did not have to ride a horse to school - Joan just climbed over the fence, and could even pop home for lunch. Grades 11 and 12 were spent at a school in the nearest town of Bounty, about eight miles away. She went to Saskatoon for teacher’s college, followed later by university.

This led to her first teaching position at Cactus Lake, a tiny hamlet that served the farm families in the community. Joan’s friend Lois had the students in grades one to eight, and Joan taught grades nine and 10. Joan and Lois lived in the teacherage, which was really an old granary. Together, they spent a great deal of time at the family home of her future husband Bernie’s parents. Joan and Bernie were married in 1959, a union that lasted 60 years until Bernie passed away.

Bernie helped his family in the general store and drove a fuel truck to deliver gas and heating fuel to the local farmers. He loved that job as he was very social and was always invited in for coffee. Joan and Bernie joined the family business and had the store for over 40 years before it was sold at auction.

Joan was Protestant and the entire community she was teaching in was Catholic. She found it very difficult to be young (18), far from her family and in a totally different environment.

The families in the community wanted a Catholic teacher and tried to remove her from her position. Joan “stayed the course,” demonstrated resilience and won over their hearts. The doctor in the community was German and a strong advocate of Bernie’s family. He told the priest, “You leave that girl alone, she is Bernie’s girlfriend.” Joan is still in touch daily via Facebook with a student she had in grade two from her first years as a teacher.

Joan and Bernie were active volunteers in the community for their entire lives. They were involved with Foster Parent’s Plan, the Red Cross, Air Cadets, the church as Sunday school teachers, Brownies, Guides, the Museum Board and the Arts Council, to name a few. Bernie received a Canada 125 medal for his volunteer spirit.

Joan’s lesson for future generations is to stay in touch with neighbours, family and friends.

Community spirit is so important and necessary for the positive health of the environment in which you reside. Joan advises keeping pictures close at hand to refer to and keep memories alive. She has embraced technology and loves having her iPad to stay connected with ones 47

she loves. Joan is the resident photographer at The Heartland and very actively involved in all programs. You can count on Joan to find a prop for every special event that is ever featured.

Joan’s hopes for the future are that “her grandchildren will always have good connections with each other and appreciate the environment they live in.”

Joan is a strong advocate of education and encourages young people to pursue their passions and love their work.

Ethel Jones

Surrounded by blessings Ethel was born in Toronto, Ontario on September 30,

1932 and lived there for over 60 years. She met her husband, Charles, on a blind date when she was 15 and needed her parents’ permission to marry him when she was just 17 in June of 1950. Ethel’s husband worked for the railway and she was able to travel around Canada, with her husband and children, by train seeing our beautiful country from coast to coast. Ethel chose to stay at home and raise her two children. She moved to Alberta in 1982 to be closer to her son who had moved here. She instantly fell in love with Okotoks and says she would never want to live anywhere else.

A difficult time in Ethel’s life was when her husband died. He passed away suddenly in 2006 from a heart attack. He was only 79 years old. Ethel said she felt like her life was ruined and wasn’t sure how she would go on but she knew that she had to.

In order to overcome her loss, Ethel became involved in the community by volunteering. She volunteered at Sandstone Lodge helping residents with activities and even got to participate in the local parade. She also became a member of St. Peter’s Anglican Church where she met many wonderful people who became her friends. By helping others, Ethel felt blessed to meet so many wonderful people and because some of them had also lost spouses she didn’t feel so alone.

The message Ethel would like to pass on to younger generations about resilience is that no matter what happens, just let things go and be happy. Surround yourself with good friends and remember your blessings and try to keep busy. Ethel’s hope for the future is that the world gets better and this pandemic we are going through goes away soon. She wants to be able to do the things she used to do like go to the bank and visit friends and family. But she is happy that she is safe and healthy. She hopes that her community can make it through this tough time and the kids can get their education and we all move forward.

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Photo courtesy of Greg Bojarski

Resiliency from taking care of loved ones “Have a sense of humor and share it with those around you.”

Caring for others can be a joy, but it can be challenging. It can also make an impact on how you see the world. For Lori, Dorothy, Joyce, Dawn, Donelda, Marjorie & Walter, Gabriella, Ron, Laura and Audrey, taking care of their loved ones taught them to take each day as it comes.

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Lori Giesbrecht Appreciating the good times

Lori was born in Edmonton and had two brothers and two sisters. Her father was a lumber salesman and her mother worked in the greenhouse industry seasonally once the children were older.

Lori took all her formal schooling in Edmonton and took further night courses for her position in the banking world. This turned into 35 years in the industry. She met her husband Bernie through the bank and was happily married for 58 years. They were the parents of two wonderful children, Tami and Todd.

In Lori’s childhood years, her mother was in very poor health and all the household responsibilities fell to the two oldest girls.

It was difficult to see her mother sad and overwhelmed by motherhood and lack of money to provide for her family. Lori remembers being asked to go to the store and her mother, Hilda, carefully counting out the change to give her to buy the groceries. Hilda had lost her own mother at the age of 14 and faced a lifetime of labouring for others. Finances were always a problem.

Lori remembers running for Carnival Queen and Miss Edmonton and having to borrow fancy clothes and gowns from her friends. This never bothered her. To this day, she has maintained friendships with some of the girls that supported her through these special events.

Lori survived the difficult times through the strong support of her family and friends. They were always there for her and she felt blessed.

Her lessons learned include “be kind and help each other out, sometimes a little bit of difficulty helps you appreciate the good times and become more resilient.”

Lori’s hopes for the future are for a healthy family and that they give back to the community in any way they can. “Keep a positive attitude and celebrate your gifts. Be kind to each other and take action when you see a need.”

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Dorothy Yemen

Strength through supporting others Dorothy was born in Gull Lake, Saskatchewan, the only

daughter in a family of three children. Her father ran the Beaver Elevator in Gull Lake and was also a farmer. She did her formal schooling in Woodville and Sunnycrest, then finished high school in California. Dorothy worked for the Wheat Pool in Regina doing filing. She was encouraged to continue her education and pursued a certificate in typing and shorthand.

Dorothy met her future husband Bill at the outdoor skating rink and they were happily married for 63 years. Bill was a master operator at the co-op refinery in Regina. They retired and moved to Vernon, British Columbia. Dorothy and Bill have three sons, 10 grandchildren and 10 great-grandchildren spread across North America. All three sons, Gary, Terry and Brian, became doctors.

A difficult time in Dorothy’s life was after the birth of her son Brian. He cried almost non-stop for the first three years of his life. Eventually, after countless tests, he was diagnosed as diabetic.

Dorothy’s key to resilience: -Faith: she has relied on God greatly, especially when Brian was so very ill. Dorothy found attending church and being involved in the church community was a huge source of support.

-Friends and family have always been a major key to her resilience. Her oldest brother was particularly supportive as he was a family member that lived in the closest proximity to her when her son was ill.

-In supporting others, Dorothy has found strength for herself - diabetic families supporting each other as they dealt with the problems relative to the disease was a sustaining grace.

Her hopes for future generations are that her grandchildren and great-grandchildren stay true to their faith, get an education, be able to look after themselves, be happy in the choices they make in life, take time to spread joy wherever they go, be patient and share appreciation for everyone in their lives.

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Joyce McConkey

Keep calm and carry on Joyce was born in Toronto in her grandfather’s bedroom,

delivered by her grandmother. Her father was a jeweler.

Joyce was raised as an only child, something she does not recommend.

She shared a memory of having her tonsils out on the kitchen table. The doctor came to the house, as it was cheaper than having the procedure done in the hospital.

Her father administered the anesthetic by pouring it over a cheesecloth from the kitchen and putting it through a strainer. “Times have certainly changed since those days.”

Joyce married, and she and her husband Donald had four children - only one surviving infancy: her daughter Patricia. Donald and Joyce had a Napa dealership and Joyce also worked as a secretary in the high school. She moved to Okotoks two years ago to be closer to her daughter and two grandchildren.

A difficult time in Joyce’s life was when her husband Donald moved into a nursing home for extra care. Each day when she came for a visit, he had two questions: “Where have you been? When am I getting out of here?” He always joked with her that if he was to suddenly disappear from the nursing home he was probably in the Humane Society across the road.

Horses and dogs were a huge part of their life.

Joyce’s lessons for being resilient include: “Life gives us a path to follow and you just need to do the best you can with what you have.”

“Have a sense of humor and share it with those around you.”

Joyce states, “I have one eye, one boob, six false teeth, two hearing aids, a lousy bladder, a bum knee and am in the process of losing my retainer, but I cannot do anything about this at my current age so I carry on. You must learn to carry on.”

She says it’s difficult to answer what her hopes for the future are because she never expected to grow this old. She just does “not want to linger.”

Her message to future generations includes accepting people for who they are and showing kindness. Her strong Scottish ancestry helped her be frugal - she always had a roof over her head and a meal. Learn to live within your means and accept family support. It is key to success in life.

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Walter & Marjorie Danylak Snapshots of our life

Marjorie was born in Butler Valley, Pennsylvania and Walt was born in Medicine Hat. Walt took his degree through the Art Institute of Chicago because he had a very strong mentor who had pursued his education there. Walter felt that if it was “good enough for Stan, it was good enough for me.” They met each other in a career class through the church in Wheaton, Illinois in 1960. They married in 1962 and had two sons, Barry and Jonathon. They have one amazing grandson Oliver.

Walt and Marjorie spent most of their married life in Wheaton, Illinois working for Wheaton College, a liberal arts college. Marjorie worked in computing services and Walter worked in photography and graphic design in the publications department. When Walter retired, they chose to move closer to an area they loved. With the mountains as a backdrop, the community of High River became their new home. Walter had a passion for photography and had pursued it from an early age, even winning a prestigious scholarship to the Banff School of Fine Arts for six weeks when he was 15 years old. Walter continued his strong interest in photography, documenting his love of landscape and wildlife until their move in 2017 to The Heartland, feeling he had already a very large portfolio of his work.

Marjorie feels that a very difficult time in her life was the support needed to help her sister Mary Pearl. She incurred brain damage as an infant in the hospital and was given a very difficult diagnosis for her future. Through the power of faith and the support of a very close family, Mary Pearl was able to overcome many obstacles. She enjoyed a rich and happy life until, as an adult, she succumbed to cancer.

Marjorie has a strong message to pass onto younger generations: “Live your life serving others and for the glory of God.” Marjorie’s hopes for the future are for a world at peace.

“Supporting each other and extending the prosperity that North America has to third world countries. We need to focus not on ourselves and what we can get but what we can give - we need a vision for world peace for all.”

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Dawn Power

One day at a time Dawn was born in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan and had

one brother. She completed her formal schooling and went on to a business college, completing a one year business program. Dawn met her husband Bob through her father’s wholesale hardware business. They were married for 57 years and had three children, one son and two daughters. When Bob passed away, Dawn lived with her daughter Kelly for a year and then moved into The Heartland to be with more people “her own age.”

A difficult time in Dawn’s life was when her youngest daughter Leanne was diagnosed with diabetes. This required Dawn to learn how to give needles and help monitor her diet. She worried about her other two children feeling neglected and giving time equally in their growing years.

Dawn’s message for resilience is to “keep on going. Take each day at a time.” Friendship has been a huge source of support for her through difficult times. Family support was paramount.

Dawn was very influenced by the positive things that worked and let other memories from her own childhood not be repeated.

Her message for future generations are to show kindness and empathy to those around you, show loyalty to friends and family, always look for the positive in all situations, engage in the world around you and take advantage of what is offered, and have faith and use it to sustain you in difficult times.

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Donelda Yurko

Carry on the best you can I had a stroke in 2006 just before moving from Calgary

to High River. In 2008, my husband Harry was diagnosed with bladder cancer. Treatment was successful. In 2009, he found out he had lung cancer. He had his first round of chemo which involved four treatments. They removed part of his left lung. During his second round of treatment, they were concerned because his blood count was high. He went to the Foothills Hospital for more tests where they discovered he had an infection. They had to remove three of his ribs to get at the infection. In 2014, cancer was discovered in his right lung and we were told that it was so far advanced that treatment was not available. Harry passed away in October of that year.

Care at the cancer centre was fantastic. The staff did everything they could to make life less difficult during a stressful time. One year, during Harry’s treatment, they asked us what we would like for Christmas. We gave them a list and they provided everything on it plus much more.

After Harry’s cancer diagnoses, life was limited because he was no longer able to travel. I did some walking with a senior’s group and I had a neighbour who became a good friend. I had my family for support. You must take one day at a time and just carry on the best you can.

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Gabriella Enyedvary Quest for freedom

Gabriella was born in Budapest, Hungary and immigrated

to Canada when she was 17 with her fiancé. She was anxious to get out of the country because it was occupied by the Soviet Union. Many of the policies at that time deeply hurt her parents as they took away her father’s business, which was a fabric and sewing accessories store. Her father loved his business and took great pride in picking out the most wonderful fabrics. After the business was lost, Gabriella’s mother returned to work as a quality control supervisor for women’s nylons. Gabriella had one brother whom she was very close to and spent a great deal of time taking care of.

A very difficult time for Gabriella was leaving her parents to come to Canada. She strongly encouraged her parents to come, but they felt that their life was well-established in Hungary and did not want to try and escape illegally. Her parents were not happy with the current political environment and worried deeply for the family so were torn by a most difficult decision. Gabriella left against her parents’ wishes with her fiancé and 25 other people - hiding in ditches to try and stay clear of the border guards carrying machine guns and following a “guide”.

The group made it to Austria and Gabriella had relatives that took her in. The relatives did not speak Hungarian and she did not speak German. They encouraged her to stay, but she was ready to try a new life outside of Europe. One of the countries she had an opportunity to come to was Canada. She knew that Ottawa was the capital city and that they used irrigation to water their crops. That was the extent of her knowledge of Canada. She did make it to Ottawa and the people were incredibly kind to her.

Upon arrival, she was taken into a home that the nuns ran called the Sisters of Service; she was fed, helped to find a job so she could make money and contribute to rent. Gabriella wanted to get married as soon as possible. The Hungarian parish priest telegrammed her parents for permission for the marriage to take place and she was married eight days later.

Gabriella was then transferred to her husband’s home, which belonged to a senator.

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They found her a job as a clerk in a large grocery store as a meat wrapper. This was a job that she was very unhappy doing. Gabriella spoke no English at this time. Luckily this did not last long and she moved to a new job in an exclusive women’s store and continued wrapping, but this time high-end clothing, and received a discount when purchasing their clothing. Gabriella had a daughter, Sylvia, and later divorced her husband. She met her future husband Thomas and they were happily married for 57 and a half years.

“Thomas was a mechanical engineer from Hungary and a true gentleman,” says Gabriella.

They had many wonderful years together as a family unit and at one time owned an art gallery in Glenmore Landing. Gabriella was also Director of Volunteer Services at the Glenmore Park Auxiliary Hospital.

Gabriella found resilience through many things. She believed that she could create a good life in Canada for her family and herself. She felt she could have the freedom in Canada that she would never have as an adult in Hungary. She believed strongly in her faith and that a divine spirit was guiding her. Gabriella became a minister in 2008 for The Center for Spiritual Living.

Her messages for future generations are to know that each person is an important part of the whole universe, to build up the family unit as this is a very important component to have your best life on earth (Gabriella’s parents visited Canada many times and her family returned to Hungary to visit), and try to take the time and the effort so that each person you meet everyday should feel that being with you was the best part of their day.

Ron Lily

The passing of time Ron was born in Lachute, Quebec. His mother and father worked for Bell Telephone, until his father started up his own very successful business in appliance repair. Ron has three siblings: two sisters and a brother. He worked in a small family grocery store close to his home throughout his formal school years, then became a service manager for a GM dealership in Calgary.

A very difficult time for Ron was when his father passed away. He felt the loss very deeply as he was in Calgary and far from home. The passing of time was the greatest healer for Ron as he realized life would go on despite the tragic loss of a man who had shaped his life.

His message for future generations is to keep in contact with your parents as much as you can because time passes quickly. Reach out to friends and family and maintain contact and communication as much as you can via Facebook, Zoom, email or telephone. Mentally challenge yourself with new programming and information to keep your mind alert and continue learning new things.

Ron also recommends buying a home as soon as you can while you are young so that there is a financial cushion as you grow older.

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Laura Hayward

History repeats itself COVID-19 has taken its toll on everyone, from physical

to mental issues. My parents emigrated from England in the 1920s and I never heard them mention the 1918 flu epidemic. I find that very strange, as both of them lived through it.

I was born on an impoverished farm in Northern Alberta.

I often think how lonely my mother must have been, knowing she would never see her family again, travel and finances being what they were. We had no power, telephone or running water; in fact, we didn’t even have a well, my dad hauled water in 45 gallon drums from our neighbour’s hand pump. Our transportation was team and wagon or sleigh.

I never remembered being hungry; we always had a milk cow and chickens and my dad was a great gardener. We ate fresh from the garden in summer and root vegetables in winter, plus whatever my mother had canned during the previous summer. Fruit was rhubarb and saskatoons. When I see strawberries in the supermarket in January, I still have trouble getting my head around it. My dad was not a hunter, but sometimes a pigeon or two found its way into the soup pot. My dad cooked porcupine sometimes and it smelled delicious and tasted like pork. Sometimes the native people brought a sick child to my dad to do whatever his knowledge allowed, and they would repay him with a piece of moose meat.

My mother patched and mended a lot. We had a rodeo in our little town one summer. I had an old pair of jeans, too short in the legs and patched, but that is what I would wear. This was long before patched and ripped was the vogue. I got up the morning of the rodeo and the zipper on my jeans had been replaced with buttons. My mother had made me a pair of jeans from a pair discarded by a neighbour and, as she didn’t have a zipper, she had taken the one out of my old jeans. She had also scraped up the money to buy me a pair of white runners. I thought I was queen for a day, and whenever I discard a pair of jeans with the zipper intact, I think of my rodeo finery.

I wish I had asked my parents about their lives before they came to Canada, I’m sure there would have been some wonderful stories, but when you’re a kid it’s all about “you”. I know my dad had a sister in England who owned a candy store and I remember thinking that owning a candy store would be a dream come true.

There were terrible epidemics of scarlet fever and diphtheria in the 1930s. Families lost two and three children - thankfully our family was spared, but my mother lived in fear of polio. She 58

was so thankful when my kids were able to be immunized in 1955. We are so fortunate to have so many labor saving devices, not to mention TV, computers, phones and Netflix. We are so blessed.

Audrey Abbott A complicated relationship

Audrey was born in East 17 London in 1931. Her father

was a musician that played brass instruments; the trumpet and the coronet. Audrey was an only child. Her primary years of education were at the local school, and she pursued further education at the Royal Society of Arts. She met her husband Geoffrey at 13 when they were both taking dance lessons. They married and travelled to Niagara Falls, Canada when he was recruited as an engineer working within the city waterworks division. They remained in Eastern Canada for several years and then came west to be near their only daughter Tracey.

A very difficult time in Audrey’s life was the death of her father. On her father’s deathbed he apologized to Audrey for the life he had given her. She felt the blow of his death was softened by her daughter Tracey being with her. Tracey adored him and he had been a good grandfather to her even though he had been a terrible father to Audrey.

Audrey feels that she developed resilience early on in her life as she had to fight for everything she ever had. Her father was frequently unemployed or “on the dole” and times were hard. She had no one to turn to other than herself. Audrey loved dancing and was talented in this area, it was a happy place for her. She was especially fond of ballet and her red tap shoes with big bows. She continued to excel in this area and it took her to another world entertaining on large London stages.

Audrey’s lessons for future generations are to never say “I can’t”. This is very different than “I won’t”. Never say no to an opportunity. Always embrace an opportunity and believe it is going to bring something.

Have an open mind and an open heart and always see the best in people and situations.

Be very kind to other people and animals. Listen to everybody and everything - it may not be important to you, but it is worthy of your time to listen and learn. You have to open doors on your own - no one else is going to do it for you.

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Photo courtesy of Cheryl Hurtak

Resiliency from faith “Rely on your faith to carry you through the dark times and difficult struggles.”

Faith and family are what May, Audrey, Ellen, Lena, Norman and Helen credit as their source of strength when they had to face difficult losses. Read how these seniors looked to their spirituality to help them through the tough times.

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May Van de Wark Should I stay or should I go?

May was born in Victoria, on Vancouver Island at St.

Joseph’s hospital in 1942. It was a scary time due to fears that Victoria Harbor could be bombed because of the recent destruction of Pearl Harbor. It was a difficult time too for her parents.

May had a sister born in High River in 1945 and had a baby brother born when she was 15; May was very happy about this as she loved babies. She was excited to help with the new addition to her family.

May met her husband Brian in 1960 and married in 1961. May and her husband went on to have two daughters. One of her daughters lives 15 minutes west of Okotoks and the other lives near Cochrane. May moved to the Heartland five years ago and she has enjoyed the relationships that she has formed, the activities that she has participated in and the overall atmosphere felt at the Heartland.

May felt that one of the most difficult times she was able to overcome was when she and her husband experienced some serious marital difficulties. She was faced with a tough decision.

She asked herself, “Should I stay or should I leave?”

May relied heavily on her faith to make this decision as her faith was the priority. May decided that she would work through the difficulties with her husband in order to return to the healthy relationship they once had. May went on to have a long-lasting marriage with her husband Brian for the next 53 years.

May shared that God was her strength and knowing that helped her to realize that no matter what life threw at her, with God’s help she could get through it. She also states that “there are a lot of hard times in life for everyone and people need to use the anchor of faith, people give up too easily.”

May’s message for future generations that might be experiencing similar struggles would be to tell them not to give up because relationships are so important and worth the pain, work and commitment. “If you care enough to marry your partner, then it is worth the effort to work to save the relationship. Forgiveness is an essential ingredient to overcoming hard times, no matter what the circumstance. Our decisions and actions can have far reaching consequences that can affect future generations.”

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Audrey Gasser

Welcome to success Audrey was born in Vancouver and had one sister.

Her mother and father originally came from England; her father was a journeyman plumber with his own business, Arthur Holden Plumbing, and her mother worked in a ladies clothing store.

She started her formal schooling in Vancouver and then the family moved to Trail where she finished high school.

She then attended Trail Business College for 10 months. Her first big job was with Cominco, then with CP Rail, and she finished her working career as a school secretary.

Audrey met her husband Glenn Gasser in Trail when he came for a visit, he was an electrician and a farmer. They married in 1955 and had four children: Steven, Ellen, Grant and Trudy.

Glenn passed away in 1990 from heart and lung complications. It was very difficult to adjust to living by herself.

Audrey found resilience through her faith - the minister of her church and his wife were very supportive, and a prayer group that met at her house was a strong source of inspiration.

She also found resilience through her children as all four children have been a big part of sustaining Audrey through her whole life, and through her loving and caring friends, who still stay in touch today.

Audrey’s message for future generations: -Love each other. “Love is the greatest thing in the world,” says Audrey.

-Always try to do the best you can.

-Enjoy every minute of your life throughout the ups and downs.

-Talk to God and share your emotions.

Audrey celebrated her 90th birthday recently and received many birthday cards from family and friends. One of the most special cards she received came from her former school principal. Outside the school was a sign that read, “Welcome to Success.” He shared with her that she was a “huge part of the success of the school.” Audrey felt this was one of her life’s greatest compliments.

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Ellen Haglund

Faith and family to carry you through Ellen was born in Kipling, Saskatchewan. Her father was

a farmer and she had six sisters and one brother. Ellen attended school in the local community. She met her future husband at a summer camp, and they later married and started a family. They had four daughters and one son, and her husband was a farmer in the Broadview community next to Kipling. Ellen was kept very busy raising her family and always doing what she could to help others. Ellen eventually moved into the Heartland because she has two of her daughters in the Foothills area.

A very difficult time in Ellen’s life was the loss of her husband when he was in his early 30s.

This changed every single aspect of her life.

Her message of resilience is to “rely on your faith to carry you through the dark times and difficult struggles. Faith and family will always get you through.”

Her children have been a huge source of support and continue to provide love and care for her every need today. Extended family members were also an invaluable asset and have stood behind her through her whole life.

Her message to future generations would be to keep the faith that your family has worked so hard to instill in you. Be kind to people - when you see a fault in someone, do not criticize, just see the best of what they have to offer. Get an education so you can be proud of your achievements and have options in what and where life takes you. Be confident in your own abilities and believe in yourself.

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Lena Hughes

Mission accomplished I come from a family of 12 children and we moved from

Manitoba to Alberta when I was four years old. My mother and father loaded seven children and everything we owned into a car, with a 10 dollar bill to get us to Alberta. I do not remember the trip but reading my father’s diary at one point we stopped and he fixed someone’s car door for the grand total of 25 cents and he was so thankful. My father was a very special person. The baby needed milk, and a cow in a pasture needed milking - he debated whether to simply milk the cow or ask the farmer for milk. The farmer gave us milk for the whole family and offered us accommodation for the evening.

I was married in 1957 and had seven children of my own. I became a single parent for seven years and then remarried in 1973 to my husband Cliff. He had four children of his own and we became a blended family of 11 children.

My brother was doing mission work and was involved with a group that traveled to Mexico. His enthusiasm excited and motivated Cliff and I to take on a new challenge. We became involved with building a schoolroom that allowed 26 more children to attend, we renovated a church, and as a team built an orphanage for 70 children. This orphanage was often over-capacity the need was so great. The children were frequently terrified and traumatized by the trip with police to the orphanage, but by the next morning they were completely calm and settled as they knew they had arrived at a safe place.

We continued this effort over 11 years and 39 separate trips of three to eight weeks in duration. This was our retirement.

Volunteering at the orphanage was a testament to my faith that God was in control and we had many blessings in store for us.

My father’s goal was always that his children would all be missionaries one day.

My mission work was a fulfillment of his dream.

I believe that in my faith I was given strength to follow my feelings, and that through this I could make sound and positive decisions. These innermost feelings have been a guide to the way I have lived my life. Resilience has been part of my whole life journey.

My hopes for the future are to continue to let faith lead my path with my family, friends and people I meet.

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Norman Johnson The Viking

As has been said by so many at one time or another, “Today is a good day!”

To be realistic, maybe today is a hellish day, a day of disappointments, the worst day ever for whatever worst reasons, causing it to be an “in the dumps day!”

Well, I have been there, done that, experienced hopelessness and helplessness and felt as if I was doomed to die and almost wished it to stop – this life of extremes!

Actually, it is a good day because you learn that you can’t extricate yourself from this particular moment of life on your own by yourself and a greater power than self is needed to bring you through to wellness of mind, body, soul and strength.

Why would I say that? What difficult times could I have faced? What possible extreme situation could I have lived through and what lessons did I learn for life survival?

In 1971, I went to Vietnam to start a ‘new life’ in a ‘new country’ to work with a ‘new group of people’ and ‘learn a new language’ – Vietnamese.

It was there in Da Nang for the next two years that every Saturday night was the ‘Saturday Night Special’. Rockets flaring through the wee hours of the morning ending in violent explosions that lasted for several hours – the radio blaring “Da Nang is under attack, Da Nang is under attack” with the city sirens splitting the air with an intensive wail.

Finally silence allowed sleep to return and bring peace and a sense of the thankfulness for surviving another ‘Saturday Night Special’. The city lights that had been turned off enveloping us in darkness were now beginning to radiate the light of hope – the signal of a new day, a new gift!

For six out of the seven days of a week, we let go of the memory of Saturday and focused on the variety of colourful fruits and vegetables, mounds of chicken and pork and fish in the open air displayed on the market tables. Why stay locked up in negativism when 96% of the time, we enjoyed Vietnamese music, Vietnamese restaurants, being among the gentle, friendly and resilient Vietnamese people; get the mind off the negative: the rocketsthe explosions-the sirens and focus on the days of happiness, learning and speaking Vietnamese; living in the present as I spoke in many churches followed by dozens of young people.

Life in Banmethuet was at best a normal tribal/Vietnamese living in situ for nearly two years.

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Then it happened! The explosions start and lasted five hours – 1 a.m. to 6 a.m. with 50,000 artillery and rocket shells falling on Banmethuet. After a lull of about two hours, the South Vietnamese launched a bombardment of the North Vietnamese that lasted about eight hours. South Vietnamese planes flew straight up into the sky, flipped over and screamed straight down, rockets launched from the wings to attack the North Vietnamese tanks in the fields as well as bombs released. By this time we were ordered out of the hole in the ground where I had retreated for shelter. As I came out of the shelter, in front of me I saw a ring of North Vietnamese around me with AK’s pointed at me and I was led away to the corner of our village street and had my hands tied behind my back and personal items taken from me. In a simply incredible moment, an officer appeared in front of me and removed his automatic weapon and pointed it at my head. In that same moment, I began to speak to him in Vietnamese, gave what I thought were suggestions of actions and then he looked at me, put his weapon away and ordered the North Vietnamese to untie me, give my personal effects back and take me away into the jungle and up the hills and I officially became a POW. What happened next was a forced march through Ho Chi Minh Trail and jungle to begin a 8.5 month movement through POW camps and taken by truck to Hanoi and then to the final POW camp called Son Tay where U.S. Senator John McCain had been imprisoned. After the 8.5 months of eating leaves off the trees and bushes that were used to feed pigs, days of interrogations we as a group of 8-10 foreigners who had been held with several hundred SVA personnel, were released to the United Nations high commissioner for refugees and taken to Hanoi; Vientiane, Laos; Bangkok, Thailand, then as Canadians to start our return to Canada via an overnight at the Canadian ambassador’s residence.

What was a time of impossible hope became a miracle of a new start of life and wonderful meeting with our two children, aged 10 and 11, who had returned previously to Canada from Panang Malaysia, not knowing if they would see their parents again. They knew that six missionaries before us were all killed. This time it would be a time of joy and thankfulness.

We had been captured March 10, 1975 and released October 30, 1975. Never did I experience fear. I had many deeply held faith truths. Yes, I suffered PTSD and Malaria comas and mental disturbances but I kept reframing bad issues with, “thank you for the gift.” Now I’m writing a book, “I Never Thought”- stark revelations of my life journey through several decades.

As for the immediate time, my wife and I are enjoying this part of our life in Okotoks, Alberta.

The move here from Ontario was heart-wrenching: leaving our friends and family members to join with other family members here. We relish the community here, the kindness of strangers, the privilege of giving back to others as members of the Lions Club of Okotoks, the Knights of Columbus at St. James Church, helping out at the Poppy Campaign of the Okotoks Legion, and attending our own events.

Remember to “reframe” the difficult times and travel life’s pathways. Share the good times to encourage each of us to keep on moving forward. We are in this life together so let’s make the best of it and reap the benefits together.

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Helen Dinner

Share love with the world Helen was born in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia and

is one of 11 children. Her father was a coal miner, policeman and a volunteer firefighter. Her mother had attended culinary school and was the best baker/chef ever. Helen fondly remembers Sunday dinners with the whole family gathered and her mother’s delicious meals.

Helen worked at Dalhousie University for five years, took a business program in Ontario, and eventually moved to Alberta after the loss of her husband Paul. Helen has two daughters, Kym and Sherry, and a son Dave. She also happily celebrates her special times with her five grandchildren.

Helen has demonstrated a spirit of resilience by overcoming early childhood trauma and issues with dependency on alcohol. She credits faith, family and strong community support programs as giving her the strength to overcome and thrive. Helen has always felt that giving to others and helping people is a key to living life to its fullest. Her heart is filled by knowing she has shared love. She has a unique ability to reach out to others at The Heartland and be their special friend. Helen has found a niche as an ambassador to make early contact with new residents and assist them in settling into community living.

Helen’s message to the younger generation would be to have a deep faith and share love with the world regardless of colour or circumstance. She especially has a soft spot for young men as they find their place in the difficult world around them. “Pick your friends carefully as they have a strong influence and often you learn lessons the hard way.”

Helen is facing early onset dementia. Her hope for the future is to stay positive, strong and move forward each day. She is ready to face new challenges as her life changes and continue giving back to her community in any way she can for as long as she can do so. She has found a key to her happiness is to take each day one at a time. Her hope for the future of the community is to “be kind to each other, take time to listen and share and celebrate what each person has to offer.”

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