CALIFORNIA MORTGAGE 3-25-19

CALIFORNIA MORTGAGE EDITION

TRY vs.

DO Business Growth Hack:

ABSORB YOUR CLIENTS’ STRESS!

COVER STORY

6 Things All Successful Negotiators Do 5 Simple Mindset Shifts that Will Help You Achieve Your goals

RAFFIE KALAJIAN

CALIFORNIA MORTGAGE EDITION

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RAFFIE KALAJIAN

CONTENTS 4) 5 SIMPLE MINDSET SHIFTS THAT WILL HELP YOU ACHIEVE YOUR GOALS 6) BUSINESS GROWTH HACK: ABSORB YOUR CLIENTS’ STRESS!

15) TRY VS. DO 19) 3 TIPS FOR MASTERFUL TO–DO LISTS 22) 6 THINGS ALL SUCCESSFUL NEGOTIATORS DO

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55 Simple Simple Mindset Mindset Shifts Shifts That That Will Will Help Help You You Achieve Achieve Your Your Goals Goals

Everyone knows that a positive attitude is one of the key steps to achieving success. It’s very easy to let negativity bring you down and oftentimes, people end up quitting at the first set back. Even if you don’t think of yourself as a negative person, you’re probably doing numerous things you don’t even realize are holding you back.

Recognizing these negative mindsets, and then implementing simple mindset shifts, are sure to help you not only create a more positive outlook, but a more successful outcome to whatever goal you’re trying to achieve.

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1

Turn jealousy into admiration

It’s very easy to look at someone who has what you want, and feel envious, which quickly turns into criticism and excuses about why you weren’t able to get what they seemed to get with ease. This is something successful people never do. Instead, they recognize that the only thing keeping them from success is themselves.

If you want what someone else has, you should look to them as a role model. What

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are they doing that you aren’t? There’s probably more to their story than you’re giving them credit for. Someone else’s success doesn’t hinder your ability to do the same, but constantly having a ‘life’s not fair’ attitude definitely will.

2

Tackle the things you dread doing first

We all procrastinate to some extent. Usually it’s things we don’t want to do. But when you put something like that off, it creates a serious cloud over your whole day.

Experts recommend getting those things out of the way first. Not only do get it crossed off your list, but you will feel energized by your accomplishments and tackle the day with even more force.

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Don’t make decisions based on emotion

Reaching goals, especially long term ones, can have a lot of ups and downs. The key to achieving them is to stay level-headed during setbacks, really focusing on your plan and how the setback fits into your long term vision.

If you have a solid plan in place, you could be destroying months of hard work with one rash emotional decision, that is probably coming from a place of panic.

When you’re feeling emotional...wait.

It really is that simple. Wait it out until Top Agent Magazine

you’re back in a rational state of mind and take it from there.

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Learn to love feedback

It’s very easy to be thrown off by negative feedback or constructive criticism. No one likes it. But when it comes to achieving your goals, you need to be able to hear it, assess it and then make an unemotional decision about what it means to you and your success.

In fact the business world’s most successful leaders are there because they not only take in that feedback, they actually constantly ask for it. Fresh perspectives on what you’re doing are always valuable. When you’re in the thick of it, it can be hard to see what needs improvement. Asking a trusted peer or advisor can be instrumental in keeping the momentum on reaching your goal going.

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Replace a fixed mindset with a growth mindset

You might be wondering what the difference between the two are. A fixed mindset thinks that growing intelligence or skills is impossible, while a growth mindset thinks those things can be developed.

People with a growth mindset are more likely to expand beyond their comfort zone, since they really believe almost anything is possible with hard work. And if it isn’t?

They’re willing to give it a try. Being willing to try and fail, is a key element to reaching even the most lofty goals.

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Business Growth Hack: Absorb Your Clients’ Stress!

Your business coach or a CRM software sales rep has probably described a number of products or services to help you grow your business. But sometimes the easiest way to increase the deals you’re closing is to simply be present for your clients. In doing so, you’ll find have the power to decrease the stress they feel. And when you decrease their stress, you increase your value to them, leading to new referrals and organic growth.

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You may be thinking, “I have enough stress; how can I find the emotional bandwidth for other people’s stress?” But consider this: As their day-to-day point of contact in this life decision, you are already a strong presence in your client’s lives. Why not allow yourself to be the only seemingly calm part of this process? By asking them what’s on their mind, by truly listening, by showing that you truly understand and even by rolling up

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your sleeves to relieve some of their grunt work, you’ll prove yourself invaluable.

Think of yourself as the equivalent of an anti-anxiety pill to your clients. All you have to do is form a few easy habits.

Laura and Raj, their agent and their loan officer soon came to learn that Laura’s 80-year-old mother may eventually move in with the family. This news not only helped the agent best meet Laura’s and Raj’s needs for a new home; it gave both the agent and the loan officer opportunities to go above and beyond for their clients. Their REALTOR® connected Laura with a senior services nonprofit near Laura’s mom’s current home that may be able to assist the family.

And their loan officer outlined various, detailed options to Laura and Raj make smart, long-term financial decisions.

Meanwhile, the agent and loan officer earned the trust of Laura and Raj, who felt less worried about the future.

Listen – really listen – with patience Behind every home purchase or sale is a person or a family with a uniquely complex set of needs, motivations, objectives and priorities. Asking the right questions and truly listening to the answers are the easiest ways to learn how to make clients’ lives easier. In doing so, you not only show that you’re interested in them as people, but you help yourself discover ways to surprise your clients with service.

Take “Laura and Raj,” for instance – a couple in their 30s who wanted a larger home because their family of five outgrew their first home. By patiently getting to know Top Agent Magazine

Empathize Don’t be afraid to describe your own personal experiences as a homebuyer or seller, explaining how you felt at the time; let your client know you “get” it. The agent who is willing to open up and let buyers and

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sellers know that they personally understand their needs and concerns will connect with clients quickly, break down barriers and help the process move smoothly.

Chayan Alavi, Broker/Owner of Alavi Agency in Long Beach, California, challenges himself and his team to ensure that every action of every day serves others. “If we can put ourselves in other people’s shoes with empathy, then we become stellar professionals and great human beings, too,” he says. “I like knowing that we remove the sales pitch from real estate and make it all about the customer.” Chayan and his team focus on customer advocacy and building trust. But they don’t take trust for granted.

Instead, they know trust must be earned and nurtured over time.

Roll up your sleeves “You can’t be afraid to do anything!” says Matthew Todd of d’aprile properties in the Chicago area. “People know there’s nothing I won’t do to get the job done.” He has 8

mowed clients’ lawns, walked dogs and personally cleaned someone’s 8,000-squarefoot, $2 million home for a showing one day after his seller left the house. Two days before another closing, Matthew’s client was unable to move large amounts of unneeded furniture out of the house he sold. No problem! Matthew joined or created five online garage sales; sold or gave away most of the client’s belongings and had the remainder hauled away before cleaning in time for the closing. “The first time I sit with a seller on listing presentation or the first day I take someone on a buyer’s tour, they know I’m ‘all-in.’”

Meanwhile, in the Cincinnati area, Aaron Denton of Summit Funding considers himself and his team members to be concierges for their borrowers. “We’re like personal assistants,” says Aaron. “People are happier when you remove the stress.” Included in their standard services are researching moving quotes; arranging and organizing movein day; scheduling utility transfers; assisting with children’s school registration paperwork; and even connecting buyers with local resources like daycares.

If “rolling up your sleeves” isn’t your strongest skill, then an easy alternative is to get to know professionals in your area who can do these tasks for you. In the end, remember that by listening with patience, empathizing, and being willing to go the extra mile, you have the power to remove the stress your clients would experience without your help.

When clients feel cared for, they remember the agents and partners who helped them.

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RAFFIE KALAJIAN

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RAFFIE KALAJIAN Area Sales Manager for Partners United Financial in Pasadena, California, Raffie Kalajian oversees a team comprised of seven loan officers and multiple support staff.

Raffie Kalajian - Area Sales Manager for Partners United Financial in Pasadena, California – has spent more than two decades injecting heart into a too-often numbers-focused business. Frequently ranked among the top 1% of mortgage professionals 10 Copyright Top Agent Magazine

nationwide by Mortgage Executive Magazine, Raffie’s commitment to excellence in customer service and always placing his client’s goals front and center have resulted in a solid reputation as a trusted mortgage professional.

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Raffie, a second-generation mortgage banker, technically began his career in 2002. Long before that, however, he had spent a great amount of time as a teenager working in the mail room at Countrywide, where his mother was one of the youngest female executives in that company’s history. “When I graduated Top Agent Magazine

from the Marshall School of Business at the University of Southern California, going into the mortgage industry just made a lot of sense to me. My parents moved here from Lebanon in 1976, and if you asked my mother what her greatest accomplishment was, she’d tell you that it was achieving the 11 Copyright Top Agent Magazine

American Dream of being a homeowner. So I know how important it is to help people achieve that. Helping people become homeowners has a special place in my heart.”

Currently overseeing a team comprised of seven loan officers and multiple support staff, Raffie continually impresses upon his dedicated employees the importance of focusing on client service rather than their paychecks.

“I always tell them to think with their hearts first,” he says, “and their pocket will eventually be rewarded. Put them in the right program and provide them with excellent service, and they will then market you to their friends and family, and your business will grow from that.”

Partners United Financial offers a wide array of loan products to suit any buyer’s needs, though Raffie singles out the company’s bank statement program for self-employed clients as one that has helped many clients who have been turned down by other companies. “We call it our Smart Self Product,” he explains, “rather than looking at their tax returns we actually use their Copyright Top Agent Magazine 12

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business bank statements to derive their income based on their deposits, so we’ve been able to help a lot of people who otherwise would not have been able to become homeowners.”

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“It’s very satisfying to help someone achieve their real estate goals,” says Raffie. “It’s the most expensive investment they might ever make, and when I get a phone call thanking me for helping them achieve a dream Copyright Top Agent Magazine 13

they thought was impossible, it’s incredibly rewarding.”

community that has given so much to me and my family, I will do,” he says.

Raffie, who enjoys spending his down-time with his wife and two young daughters, is also passionate about giving back to his community, and does so through a variety of ways.

“Anything I can do to help give back to the

When asked about his plans for the future of his business, Raffie grows thoughtful for a moment. “I just want to continue providing excellent service,” he says, “and keep making a positive difference in my community.”

For more information about

RAFFIE KALAJIAN,

please call 626.705.2506 or email Raffie@partnersunitedfinancial.com

http://www.justingrable.com Copyright Top Agent Magazine 14

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Try vs Do

By Barry Eisen

“Do or do not. There is no try.” – Yoda (1977) The day is done. It seems you’ve done a million things. Everything went well. You had loads of energy and you’re stoked. Clients listened to you and acknowledged the clarity and wisdom of your suggestions. Your kids paid attention. Even the dog obeyed. Great feelings!

Dawns a new day... You wake up groggy, you become a magnet for clients’ frustrations, you feel invisible, the dog spits up on the thick white rug, an associate points out a huge stain on your shirt, a selling appointment cancels and it’s not even 10:00 AM. Know what you are? Normal. Look around and you will find a lot of normal. Stuff happens to us all. To some, who seem to attract more stuff than the rest (something to be said about selffulfilling prophecies) the distractions feel overwhelming and continuous.

Some try their best to turn the tide. Trying doesn’t work. Doing does.

Effort is appreciated, but accomplishment creates the lifestyle and is a lot more satisfying.

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We use the word often and teach our kids to try hard. Think of what the concept of “trying” implies. We are telling ourselves to make the effort.

But how often do we confuse effort and activity with accomplishment? Is it not our egos protecting ourselves from the perceived agony of failure by saying...you don’t have to do what it takes, just appreciate the effort.

It’s kinda like the controversy raging on today about all kids getting trophies for participating in a competition, even if they came in last place. Maybe rewards for the little ones keep them engaged, but the reality of life for most adults is about accomplishing, not efforting.

Some try their best to turn the tide. One of the surest ways to become a victim is to try.

Trying doesn’t When we commit to trying something and fall short work. Doing oftoadosuccess, we can always claim “ I tried.” Even in failure does. we can claim victory as we achieved what we committed to... I tried! Be careful of the words you use as they become converted into action. As in sports, good effort is appreciated, but the ones who want it more generally prevail. They call it Scoreboard.

The “doer” is the person who takes the bigger risk of making the extra effort. Without the risk to continue and create a victory, you create “normal.” It’s safe but unsatisfying. And worse yet, this settling for the lazy way out develops into whining, excuse making, low energy, irritability and much more. Do what’s right, not what’s easy. The best of your intentions won’t create a better relationship, clean up the planet or make you more money.

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7 DO’s to make a difference:

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Leave every part of your day with a positive accomplishment (even a small one).

In every endeavor, act AS IF you were already successful and capable. Show yourself what you CAN DO.

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Do what’s right, not what’s easy.

Read or listen to positive books or recordings at least 30 minutes each day-spend as much time with personal development as you do growing your business. Look for and apply the lessons that feel right.

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Write out your to-do list every night before you go to sleep, whether you feel like it or not and prioritize it. Let it guide you to better decisions during your day.

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Create a Value Added mindset that allows you to under promise and over deliver. That unexpected extra personal touch, that personalized attention, that piece of humanity, the extra door you knock, the thank you, please, your welcome can put you over the top. It is usually the little things that make a difference.

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Develop strong enough “whys” and the “hows” answer themselves.

Dig deeper than just an amount of money. Money doesn’t motivate.

Figure out what moves you and your focus will become laser-like.

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Follow through and do it not because you “have to,” but because you “get to.” Play, have fun, lighten up and shine.

Barry Eisen teaches personal development seminars and coaches Southern California top producing REALTORS®. “Your business will never grow more than you do” is the theme; self hypnosis and behavior modification are the tools for playing a bigger game. barryeisen.com, barryeisen@LA.twcbc.com Copyright©, Barry Eisen. All rights reserved.

818-769-4300

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3 Tips For Masterful To-Do Lists

by Rob Flitton

Here are three masterful tips to easyto-prepare and easy-to-perform todo lists.

1-Important v. Urgent.

Always prepare your lists based on what is important, not what is urgent. Why? Let’s define our terms.

“Important” in this context is about what matters to you. “Urgent” in this context is about what matters to others.

People have a tendency to not only assemble their lists based on the needs of other people, they get derailed by interruptions and distractions from the pressing needs of others—they get on phone calls, discussions, text-threads, or emailexchanges that take away their focus.

The corollary tricks here are to (i) negotiate for time and space in advance, and (ii) learn to say “no.”

Since you want to focus on what’s important and not on what’s urgent, it causes you much less friction to negotiate ahead of time with those who matter to you for the time and space you need to be able to focus.

This keeps you from worrying about family matters when at work, and work matters when enjoying your family or leisure time.

When we are afraid in life to politely say “no” to the wrong thing, we makes ourselves unavailable to say “yes” to the right things. Those who appreciate and understand you will cooperate—those who do not will simply have to adjust.

2-Obey The Crow.

Sometimes these urgency-intruders There should never be more than 7 can be close to you and hard to say items on your to-do list. No one no to—your spouse, boss, children, can concentrate on too many things at once. customers, or strangers.

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To be able to focus, a person needs to be able to discern which activities or ideas are most important to him at that moment, and at any given moment a person is only able to hold, focus on, or visualize perhaps somewhere between 4 and 7.

This limitation was understood from an experiment observing a flock of crows gathered in a clearing. When various groups of men would cross the clearing and then enter the nearby woods, the crows would flee to the 20

treetops only to return when the full number of men could be accounted for—i.e., when they felt safe.

If one man went in and then came back they would return to the clearing. If three men went into the woods and only two returned, they wouldn’t. If five men went into the woods and only four returned, they felt safe to return to the clearing.

This means that the crows could only hold 3 or 4 units of the men in their focus.

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Focusing on where the money comes from strips away all of the non-essentials.

For humans, the same is true but may be slightly higher. Look at a forest—you can perceive and focus on and count about 6 or 7 trees at one time, but you can never focus on or count an entire forest.

being the most important, and 1 dollar sign being the least important—like movie, book or restaurant ratings.

At the end of the to-do list period— whether it is a daily, weekly, monthly or annual list—you need not have completed every item, but you need to have entirely completed or accomplished the 4- and 5-star items. You would rather fully complete three 5star items than partially complete all seven items on your list.

The powerful piece of knowledge here is that by using unit economy— by limiting your ideas and activities into manageable groups—you can greatly overcome these limitations and leverage your means to tackle more and more work. By breaking lists down into groups of 4 to 7 Money is a measuring stick for how units, you can accomplish hundreds, effective you are at conducting your if not thousands, of important jobs business—it is really the only objective means of measuring your and tasks annually. effectiveness. Yes, there are plenty of non-monetary goals and outcomes 3-Dollar Signs.

The matter of deciding what should we all want to achieve, but I assert be at the top of your list should that being profitable matters the come down to the money. Money is most, and your to-do lists need to best barometer of what you should establish the mental attitude required spend your time on. Bookkeeping is to achieve maximum profitability. an important task in business, but Focusing on where the money comes closing sales is significantly more from strips away all of the nonimportant—no sales adds up to no essentials. need for bookkeeping.

Rob Flitton is a Seattle Real Estate MarAssign everything on your to do list a number of dollar signs, 5 dollar signs Top Agent Magazine

keting specialist helping independent agents to increase their income. Email Rob robflitton@gmail.com at any time or call/ text him at 206-612-2314.

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6 Things All Successful Negotiators Do If you think about it, you’ve been negotiating your whole life. As a kid you negotiated constantly with your family, your teachers, and your classmates. If you’re a parent, you’re negotiating probably more than you ever have in your life. But it’s one thing to negotiate staying up late on a school night, people oftentimes have trouble translating those real world negotiation skills into the business world. But the truth is there are a lot similarities.

Expert negotiators all have skills and techniques they bring to the table. It’s quite possible you also have them, and don’t even realize 22

it. Here’s a look at some traits that are common among expert negotiators.

1. They keep emotion out of the process It’s very easy to feel frustrated, angry and defensive during a negotiation process. But when emotions run high, it’s often difficult to respond with logic and reason. This can be especially difficult if the person you’re negotiating with tries to escalate the situation. As the saying goes, keep calm and carry on. You

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have an end goal in mind, and getting heated won’t help you meet it. If things don’t go your way, remember it’s not personal. Best to leave the table with no hard feelings. Hopefully even though you may not have gotten what you’ve wanted this time around, you’ve established a foundation for success at your next try.

2. They’re reasonable If you don’t ask for what you want you’ll never get it, but at the same time, you need to be reasonable about what you’re asking for. Yes, ask for a little more than you want, so you have some wiggle room to compromise. But if you ask for too much too soon, you might shut down the person you’re negotiating with from the start, or even worse offend them. No one wants to feel like they’re being taken advantage of. Ask for what you deserve and you’ll never go wrong. At the very least you might start the conversation on how that might be possible down the line, if it isn’t just yet.

3. They’re well-prepared Part of being reasonable is being well-prepared. One of the biggest mistakes novice negotiators make is showing up over-confident and under prepared. Have the research and facts to back up what you’re asking for. Show your negotiation partner evidence of why what you’re asking for is not only fair, but necessary. Facts are hard to shoot down. This will also give you the confidence to really push for what you want. It’s not just something you think, it’s something that’s undeniable true. If you go in unprepared you’re more likely to flounder, which will damage your credibility going into future negotiations.

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4. They always strive for a win/win solution for everyone Yes, negotiations are about getting what you want, but as the old saying goes, you get more flies with honey than vinegar. Your negotiation partner might also have reasonable requests that you need to consider. Ultimately, successful negotiations are about compromise on both sides, and ending up with an outcome that benefits everyone.

5. They’re creative Problems and conflict are a natural part of any negotiation. One surefire way to impress, is to head off any impending roadblocks, by coming up with creative solutions. It’s easy to point out problems and be negative. Truly expert negotiators think outside the box, and dazzle with innovative concepts and ideas that leave everyone excited about the process.

6. They’re good listeners Listening in order to really understand where your negotiation partner is coming from is important for two reasons: you not only want to make them feel heard, but knowing what they want is invaluable information you can use to get what you want. At the start, you’re gathering information by asking questions and really hearing what they say, which includes picking up on body language and nonverbal cues as well. This is part of being well-prepared, using every possible thing you can to have an advantage.

Being in control of the situation, and then leading everyone to a successful conclusion all around is what great negotiation is all about.

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