The New Agda: The NEW Rules of Etiquette for In-Pson Meetings

by: amanda harper

There’s no denying that the way we do meetings has changed dramatically in the last five years. While the combination of new technology and a new generation of business owners certainly had a hand in that evolution, Covid certainly put a nail in the coffin of our old ways of doing business. That can be a mixed bag; it can be tough to strike the right balance between professional and personable. We have some tips to help your business toe that line with grace!

Any meeting truly begins the moment you communicate the intent to set a meeting. How you handle coordinating the details sets the tone for the entire experience – and poor communication can reflect poorly on you.

If it’s an intra-office meeting, it’s best to follow established protocols; in the absence of any set method for organizing a meeting, try sending a calendar invite that communicates your proposed date, time, location and purpose.

But if you’re meeting with someone outside your office, things can be more difficult. We recommend sending an initial email (or picking up the phone!) to explain the intent of the meeting and to work out a possible date. Don’t let it become phone tag; propose firm dates and times rather than leaving it open-ended. Follow up with a calendar invite that summarizes any pertinent details. Should you follow up? If a meeting was set more than two weeks prior, feel free to email (or text if your client has okayed that form of communication) the day before, ensuring you’re “still on” for your planned meeting date. That is unless the person you’re meeting with has previously canceled meetings at the last minute; in that case, we fully endorse “checking in” several business hours before any meeting.

The rule of thumb (pardon the pun) in a meeting is that the host or higher-ranked person in the room initiates the first handshake. But we find that most people aren’t sticklers for this custom; if everyone is present and no one has made a move to start shaking hands, feel free to jump in. If you are seated when they enter the room, stand to initiate the introduction and handshake.

One major caveat? If someone is wearing a face mask, take the lack of handshakes as a sign that the people present aren’t comfortable with doing so.

Introduce yourself with your full name and title. If you are part of a team, let the highest-ranking member of the team introduce themselves first. If that’s you, feel free to introduce the other team members, especially if they’re “behind the scenes” types.

Generally, it would be best to allow the people you are meeting to introduce themselves. One exception would be if there are any late arrivals – in that case, feel free to make introductions if no one else immediately steps up.

It’s common for meetings today to include both in-person and virtual participants. It’s important that you make your virtual attendees feel seen and heard. Periodically address the virtual attendees and ask them if they have any questions. This is a weird tip that works: when they’re speaking, occasionally make “eye contact” with the camera lens. From their perspective, this will feel like making actual eye contact with them and will help them feel better heard.

Everyone knows this rule, but almost nobody abides by it. In a casual, conversational meeting, it’s so easy to slip into gossip. And if the juicy details are on a celebrity or newsworthy figure – and the details are mostly HR-okay – it’s probably fine. But what if it’s about a mutual acquaintance or local person?

The simple answer is that avoiding gossip in a professional setting is best. If someone on your team brings gossip to the table, sweep the conversation onto a new topic – and reprimand that team member afterward in private. If the person you’re meeting with brings up the dish, listen and react appropriately, but don’t engage; don’t speculate, and don’t add details.

Gossip ultimately reflects poorly on your business. If you accidentally spread false information, your company becomes a “source” along the rumor mill. You never know what connections those in the room might have to the subject of discussion.

Thank the person or group you are meeting with for their time. If appropriate, send a thank you card as a follow-up. It’s not just the right thing to do; it also helps you stay top of mind!