Tidbits of Grand Forks - May 16, 2019

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ETIQUETTE

by Kathy Wolfe

It’s National Etiquette Week, and Tidbits is advising you on the right, wrong, and wacky rules about manners and rude behavior.

• Etiquette was essential clear back to Biblical times, with proverbs advising a person to “Eat as it becometh a man, and devour not, lest thou be hated.” Ancient leaders advised against licking one’s fingers and belching after a good meal, drinking wine in one gulp, and being free of offensive body odor.

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• Medieval knights were held to very strict rules of conduct, including “gallantry and courtesy to women” and respect for and defense of the weak.

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• As early as 1528, a book of manners was in existence, with advice on gentility, wittiness, and discretion. Those who wished to climb the social ladder were counselled to have impeccable manners. One of the 16th century’s most popular essays instructed people not to eat with mouths open or sneak sideways glances at others, and to engage in self-restraint and bodily control, both described as “civilizing processes.”

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Quiz Bits

5. Where was the house in the song “The House of the Rising Sun” located?

6. How many season did the TV sitcom “The Office” run?

7. In the TV series “Lost,” what is the name of the group that conducted scientific experiments on the island?

8. What is the capital of British Columbia?

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1. What item is never to be ordered after a meal in Italy?

2. According to Victorian etiquette, who sits to the right of the hostess?

3. Who was the first U.S. president to be born in the 20th century?

4. On which Hawaiian island is Pearl Harbor located?

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ETIQUETTE (continued) • In the 1730s, Britain’s Lord Chesterfield first used the word “etiquette” in a series of 400 letters written to his son on the “art of becoming a man of the world and a gentleman.” These letters instructed the boy on good breeding and social graces as a method of social advancement.

• France’s King Louis XIV instituted a very elaborate form of etiquette for all who would visit the Chateau de Versailles. Because the King’s court might receive as many as 10,000 visitors a day, a sophisticated form of order was needed, and all guests were handed instruction cards outlining proper etiquette while in Versailles.

Those who wanted to speak to the King were prohibited from knocking on his door, rather people had to gently scratch on his door with their left pinky finger. At the royal dinner table, it was bad manners to talk about the food that was being served, even if it was exceptional. No talking in a loud voice was allowed, nor were diners allowed to make any sounds while eating. Louis introduced napkins to the table; prior to that, guests wiped their hands on the tablecloth. It was incorrect etiquette to talk to someone to whom a person had not been introduced.

Introductions could only be made by the host or hostess, and the other person first had to be asked if he or she approved of the introduction.

• In Louis’ court, only the King and Queen had the right to sit in chair that had arms. Ladies and gentlemen were not allowed to cross their legs in the presence of royalty.

• Victorian times brought an extremely complicated systems of rules, including the proper use of cutlery, the art of writing letters, and regulations for proper interaction between differing social classes.

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...continued

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ETIQUETTE (continued)

• Many of what the British deemed proper went by the wayside with colonists in the New World, a fact that disturbed the Brits. When English author Charles Dickens visited Washington, D.C., he pronounced it the “headquarters of tobacco-tinctured saliva” shooting forth from the mouths of “not always good marksmen.”

• We’ve all heard of the “no elbows on the table” rule, but manners experts say it is perfectly acceptable to put your elbows on the table when no utensils are being used but not when people are actually eating.

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• It’s certainly rude to show up late to a dinner party, and you should know that proper decorum allows the hostess to proceed with dinner if you are later than 20 minutes.

• When it’s time to be seated at the table, dinner guests should approach their chair from the left side and should exit on the right as the polite way to avoid a collision. If the need to use the restroom arises during dinner, according to manners gurus, it’s inappropriate to mention it to the group. A simple “excuse me” is the acceptable method to accomplish this.

• Once seated at the table, and one of your fellow diners asks you to pass the salt, you should always pass both the salt and pepper. They’re a pair that should be kept together in the event that the person asking wants both of them. It’s also a cardinal rule to always pass to the right.

• There’s appropriate protocol for wine glasses, too. White wine glasses are to be held by the stem, while red wine glasses are held by the bowl. And if the group is offering a toast to you, you should not drink to yourself! ...cont'd

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ETIQUETTE (continued)

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• All of us probably remember our mothers admonishing us, “Don’t point!” The rule of thumb is you can point at something, but never at someone. If you are pointing out an individual across the room, it is permissible to gesture with an open hand.

• It’s an automatic reflex to cover your mouth when you sneeze or cough. But did you know that it’s bad manners to cough into your right hand? Etiquette experts say that the right hand is your “social hand,” used for shaking hands and other social activities. The left hand should be used for coughing, sneezing, scratching, etc. It’s inappropriate to sneeze into your hand then offer to shake hands with a person.

• Did you know there is a special set of rules for cigar smokers? “Zino Davidoff’s Guide to Cigar Etiquette” was published in 1967, outlining appropriate behavior, such as only smoking the cigar halfway, and letting it burn out on its own, as well as never relighting a cigar that is more than two-thirds smoked. Mr. Davidoff says it’s impolite to smoke cigars while walking. It’s considered an insult to give another smoker a light from your cigar without first knocking the ash from yours. It’s also in poor taste to chain smoke cigars.

• If you’re visiting the country of Japan, it’s perfectly fine to slurp your noodles. It shows the hostess that you are enjoying them! However, be sure to remove your shoes when entering a Japanese home.

• Folks in China find it acceptable to burp after a meal. It’s a sign they are pleased with the meal.

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• On May 20, 1873, San Francisco businessman Levi Strauss and Reno, Nevada, tailor Jacob Davis are granted a patent for work pants reinforced with metal rivets, then known as "waist overalls." It marked the birth of one of the world's most famous garments: blue jeans.

• On May 23, 1911, the New York Public Library, the largest marble structure ever built in the United States, is dedicated in New York City. It took 14 years to complete. The next day some 40,000 people passed through its doors. The collection already consisted of more than a million books.

• On May 25, 1927, Robert Ludlum, the author of 21 best-selling thrillers, including the Jason Bourne spy novels, is born in New York City.

Ludlum sold more than 300 million books before his death in 2001.

• On May 21, 1932, aviator Amelia Earhart flies solo across the North Atlantic, five years after aviator Charles Lindberg made the first solo flight. Earhart traveled over 2,000 miles from Newfoundland to Ireland in under 15 hours.

• On May 26, 1959, Harvey Haddix of the Pittsburgh Pirates pitches 12 perfect innings against the Milwaukee Braves, only to lose the game on a two-run double in the 13th inning. It was the first time in major-league history that a pitcher threw more than nine perfect innings.

• On May 22, 1972, President Richard Nixon arrives in Moscow for a summit with Soviet leaders. Although it was Nixon's first visit to the USSR as president, he had visited Moscow once before -- as U.S. vice president in 1959.

• On May 24, 1964, a referee's call in a soccer match between Peru and Argentina sparks a riot.

More than 300 fans were killed and another 500 injured in the violent melee at National Stadium in Lima, Peru.

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ETIQUETTE EXPERTS

Answer

Weekly SUDOKU

Answer

King CROSSWORD

Over the years, these ladies have stood out as experts in eti- • Baldridge was responsible for updating Amy quette, and continue to be the standard for proper behavior.

Vanderbilt’s Complete Book of Etiquette, as well • Emily Post was raised in privilege as the daughter of a as penning 20 books of her own on the subject. wealthy architect. Educated by governesses and New York • Amy Vanderbilt published her book of etiquette City’s prestigious Miss Graham’s finishing school, Emily in 1952. A distant cousin of the famous railroad was introduced to society at an elegant ball in a Fifth Avmagnate Vanderbilt family, Amy had worked in enue mansion. She was wed to a prominent banker, whose advertising and public relations, while doing five infidelity created a huge scandal, leading to their divorce years of research for her book of manners. She when Emily was 33. also hosted a 1950s television program, “It’s in Good Taste,” and a radio show “The Right Thing • Since her ex-husband had lost his fortune in a stock market crash, Emily turned to writing to support herself and to Do.” Her book offered the standard of conduct for everything from how to write thank-you two sons. After a few romantic short stories, she had pubnotes, including which stationery to use, to hostlished five novels by age 38. She switched to a sourcebook on etiquette, which almost immediately became a ing a party to planning a wedding. Her book is best seller in 1922. In the years to come, ten editions of the still in print after many revisions. book were published, and her book of etiquette has never • Judith Martin is a modern-day etiquette authority, been out of print. At one time, Emily’s etiquette book was better known as Miss Manners. The daughter of the second most-stolen book from libraries. The first was Polish immigrants, Judith began writing an advice the Bible. column at age 40, answering etiquette questions and contributing mini-essays on proper behavior.

• Emily based her many books on her root belief that manners included “good form in speech, knowledge of proper More than 200 newspapers publish her column social graces, and charm.” In Emily’s words, manners are three times a week. In her column, she always re“a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you fers to herself in the third person, such as “Miss Manners believes…” She has written 18 books have that awareness, you have good manners, no maton the subject, including Miss Manners’ Guide to ter what fork you use.” Her pet peeves were pretentious Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, Miss Manners people, dirty silverware, and hostesses who served themon Painfully Proper Weddings, and Miss Manselves first. ners: A Citizen’s Guide to Civility.

• Another etiquette expert, Letitia Baldridge, not only acted as First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy’s Social Secretary, she • Miss Manners advises that “if you behave in a way that offends the people you’re trying to deal wrote a regular newspaper column on appropriate behavior and ran her own PR firm. Letitia had met Jackie at with, they will stop dealing with you.” She cites “blatant greed” as the most serious etiquette probMiss Porter’s School, a prep school in Farmington, Connecticut, and the pair went on to attend Vassar College lem in America. together.

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May 6, 2019

• “If you have a flannel-backed vinyl tablecloth that gets a tear, don’t throw it out. You can cut it into rectangles to line a shelf. Use a thin bead of glue at the edges to keep them down, and it makes a nice liner. You can even use squares between pans as a scuff guard.” — T.A. in Ohio • Washcloths with tags on them can be hung from an “S” hook on a towel bar.

You can fit several, and they’ll still dry as long as you hang them from the tag.

• Sewing machine tip from C.K. in Texas: “After you oil your machine, use a folded over paper towel to put a few stitches through. It will absorb any excess oil that is on the machine’s surface or needle.”

• Use a used fabric softener sheet to collect cat hair from areas where Kitty likes to nap — the back of the couch, fabric-covered chairs, etc. This also works on curtains that are regularly rubbed up against. Make sure you use a sheet that has already gone through the laundry.

• “Idea for an old, unpaired sock: Insert a tennis ball and tie closed, then give to a dog as a toy.” — R. in Oregon. (Here’s another: Fill with clean, uncooked white rice and knot closed.

Heat in the microwave for a hot pack to use on aching muscles.)

• Use an old toothbrush to clean out your combs or small brushes. Spray the comb with alcohol and then use the toothbrush to scrub it clean.

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• The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny ...'." -- Isaac Asimov • If you're planning a summer vacation in Maine this year, you might want to keep in mind that in that state, it's against the law to tickle a woman under the chin with a feather duster.

• You might be surprised to learn that drinking tea increased the life expectancy of the British -and even more surprised to learn why. It wasn't any beneficial compound found in the tea itself; rather, it was the act of boiling the water, which had the effect of killing pathogens found in the untreated water that was largely in use in England at that time. Also, once the Brits started drinking tea, they became addicted to the caffeine and therefore drank quite a bit more boiled water than had been their wont, decreasing even further their exposure to the pathogens that caused illness.

• You've doubtless heard of paranoia, but you're likely not familiar with metanoia. "A profound transformation in one's outlook" isn't terribly common considering today's deep societal divisions.

• Food for thought: What could you do with an extra $1,500? According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, for every person in an American home, almost 300 pounds of food is thrown out each year. For a family of four, this amounts to about $1,500 in waste annually.

• Researchers in Greece who recently completed a study on napping found that men who nap at least three times a week were at a 37 percent lower risk for heart-related death. So now you have an excuse to do what you want to do anyway.

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EXPRESS

MINIATURE GOLF

May 11 has been designated Miniature Golf Day, time to step onto the green and learn about this amusing pastime.

• The world’s oldest miniature golf course is still in existence and operating today in St. Andrews, Scotland. While the game of golf had been played by men at St. Andrews for some 600 years, the social proprieties of the day declared it improper for ladies to take a full swing at a golf ball and to “take the club back past their shoulder.” As a result, a miniature course was established for ladies in 1867, The Ladies’ Putting Club of St. Andrews. Don’t look for windmills and Eiffel Towers on this course. Today’s course is a putting green of 18 holes covering two acres of “humps and bumps, valleys, and pockets.”

• America’s first miniature golf course came along in 1916, when steamship baron James Barber designed his own personal course on his Pinehurst, North Carolina estate. Dubbed Thistle Dhu, Barber included fountains and gardens along geometrically designed walkways. The community of Pinehurst has continued his legacy with the construction of an 18-hole putting course of the same name. It’s not your usual novelty-type course, instead using a traditional style of rolling greens, hills, ponds, and trees.

• In 1926, two ingenious New Yorkers came up with the idea of building mini golf courses on the roofs of the city’s skyscrapers. Drake Delanoy and John Ledbetter copied the artificial surface idea of Thomas Fairborn, and ended up with a lawsuit for patent infringement. After meeting an agreement with Fairborn, there were 150 rooftop courses by 1930. ...continued

Solution on Next Page

MINIATURE GOLF (continued)

DIFFERENCES: 1. Boy's hat is different. 2. Man's nose is smaller.

3. Fence replaces house on left. 4. Box is taller.

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• In 1927, Tennessee hotel owner John Garnet Carter patented his version of mini golf that he called “Tom Answer: Dell.Thumb Golf.” Trying to draw traffic to his A hotel, Carter builtNUMBER the course on LookVERY LARGE out Mountain, a course designed by his wife • Edward Kasner was a mathematician. In 1938 Frieda with a fairyland theme. The course was he was asked to come up with a name for a covered with cottonseed hulls mixed with oil, very large number: the numeral one, followed rolled onto a foundation of sand, a technique by a hundred zeros. He asked his two young that had been bywould American businessnephews whatpatented name they suggest. man Thomas Fairborn a few years earlier.

The • Nine-year-old Milton suggested a name Lookout Mountain was strip the site of the out of the funnies.course A cartoon character first documented mini golf competitions.

More named Barney was very popular. Milton chose than 200 golfers fromfor 30the states gathered there in Barney’s last name number.

1930.

Carter’s course was so successful thatbig by • Kasner announced the new name for the 1930, he had more than 3,000the Tom Thumb number in hissold next book, altering spelling. franchises through his company, the Fairyland • Sixty years later, Larry Page and Sergey Brin Manufacturing Corporation.

About 25% Other of the developed a new internet search engine. mini golf courses in America were Tom Thumb search engines searched each webpage and ranked them according to the howdecade, many times a designs, and by the end of an estispecific term appeared on them, but Page and mated 4 million people were playing the game.

Brin designed their search engine to search for • The of quirky novelty props along the idea specific term and then find out came how many during the Great Depression.

Because regulalinks there were that led back to that page, tion mini golf courses weresearch too pricey for most which resulted in a better engine. folks, courses were built using whatever • They decided they needed a name everythat day items could scavenged.

Tires, gutreflected how be many websites the rain search ters, barrels, and pipes were incorporated along engine was searching. They took the name the soon the unusual items became of paths, Edwardand Kasner’s very large number, only they misspelled it slightly, so it endedvolcanoes, up being the norm.

Over the years, windmills, spelled exactly sameand wayother the obstacles cartoon waterfalls, movingtheramps, character Barney spelled his last name. What’s were added. it called? (Answer at bottom of page) • Due to limited winter daylight hours in ScanCOMPUTER FACTS dinavia, glow-in-the-dark courses are popular.

•AIn40-foot 1981 Bill Gates issaid, kb ofofmemory volcano the “640 highlight Myrtle ought to be enough for anybody.”

Beach, South Carolina’s course, where the •Master’s Moore’s Law states thatiscomputer Tournament played performance every year. doubles every 18 to 24 months, and ever since Thirty-five peacocks meander the green at the 1971, this has been true.

Gilbertsville, Kentucky course. The Cheyenne, •Wyoming HP, Google, Microsoft, Apple of were all course includes and miniatures several started in garages. of the state’s famous landmarks, including DevAnswer: Google, from googol. il’s Tower and Old Faithful.

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Quiz Answers

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