The Importance of Middle School Coaches

By: Katie Page Nimitz Middle School (NEISD) Girls Athletics Coordinator

The Coaches We Never Forget

The scents of Axe and Bath and Body Works fill the air, and for me, that familiar aroma instantly takes me back. It reminds me of a time when I was just beginning to find my voice and realize there was a bigger world out there. It was a time of confusion and frustration, where my voice was often silenced and the vast world made me want to retreat. The confusion and frustration never really went away, but the right people made it a little less overwhelming.

Middle school is a tough time for everyone, whether you’re a student, teacher, or coach. It’ll chew you up and spit you out. How you emerge on the other side depends on your support system. Coaches are a crucial part of that system, especially when children start to feel their independence and see their parents as just “annoying.” For some middle schoolers, their coach is the only support system they can truly count on.

Many coaches and athletes remember their high school or college coaches, but what about the ones who came before? Middle school coaches are often overlooked, yet they may be the sole reason we chose to pursue a sport in high school and beyond.

The Coaches Who Shaped Me

Growing up in Oklahoma, my school district didn’t have much in the way of middle school sports. We had cross country and football for seventh graders, with basketball added in the eighth grade. My first and only experience with school sports was playing basketball in eighth grade.

My first middle school coach was Coach Limes, my seventh-grade P.E. teacher. She also coached at the high school, but I don’t remember what sport. She was the first person who showed me that it was possible to be a mom and a coach at the same time. I think about her a lot now that I’m a mom and a coach myself. She made it look so easy, and I wish I knew her secret. She genuinely cared about each of her students and made everyone feel welcome. I’ve never felt like I fit in anywhere, and that feeling of acceptance stuck with me.

In eighth grade, my basketball coach was Coach Revels. She was one tough cookie! She taught me that even when everything seems stacked against you, you can’t quit. You have to push through and break those barriers. She made sure our team understood that hard work would get us where we wanted to go, but teamwork would make the journey better. These two women were the only coaches I had in middle school, but the lessons I learned from them have lasted well into my adult life. The impact of a middle school coach is truly remarkable.

An Unforgettable Influence

Middle school coaches have a tremendous amount of power. They can inspire a kid to fall in love with a sport or turn them off of sports forever. A middle school coach can help an athlete recover from an injury, a heartbreak, or a family tragedy. Their impact reaches far beyond the playing field, whether a student-athlete realizes it or not.

I’ve spent my entire 20-year career in the middle school scene and recently found myself questioning if I was still in the right place. Then, out of the blue, I received a message from a former student who graduated in 2012. She wrote, “Hi Mrs. Page! I am up with my girls right now (3:ooam). I just wanted to let you know that you made a huge impact on my life and my mental health when you didn’t even know it. I always looked forward to being with you because you made me feel better. You’re an amazing person and don’t ever forget it.” I had no idea I was that influential for her. In the time since, I have had other student-athletes reach out to me to let me know how the things I did for them or said to them has impacted their lives.

Middle school coaches are like the middle child of the coaching family—often forgotten. In reality, their influence on a child’s life can be greater than that of any other coach.

So, what can middle school coaches do to ensure they’re making a positive impact on their student-athletes?

• Be a listening ear. Sometimes, all a kid wants is for someone to hear them.

• Be fair. Kids know when there’s favoritism. Consequences should apply to everyone, from the star player to the kid on the bench.

• Be a teacher first. Let them learn from their mistakes.

• Be patient. We all want patience and grace, and we need to show the same to our students.

• Be a good example. Show them how to be a good human being and serve others.

• Be kind. As Coach Mackey points out, being kind doesn’t always mean being “nice.” It means giving them the message they need to hear, even if it’s a little hard for them to hear it.

• Be honest. I always ask my athletes, “Do you want me to be honest or spare your feelings?” They always choose honesty. A little honesty goes a long way.

• Give them standards and keep them for everyone. They will rise to the occasion if you give them the chance.

• Be forgiving. Middle school kids make a lot of mistakes and say things they don’t mean. Show them forgiveness.

A Partnership for Success

High school coaches, you play a vital role, too. Supporting middle school coaches creates a seamless transition for athletes. Here’s what you can do to help:

• Stay in contact with middle school coaches. Know their names, their sports, and be visible.

• Ensure vertical alignment. Share your practice outlines, common drills, and language.

• Visit practices and attend middle school games. Show up and cheer on the athletes.

• Listen to middle school coaches. They know the athletes and their families and can provide valuable insight.

• Trust their judgment. Respect their knowledge of the athletes they’re sending to you.

• Be a mentor. You can help a middle school coach grow and prepare for their future in high school sports.

• Offer a helping hand when your feeder school hosts tournaments. Work the ticket booth or keep the scorebook.

• Be honest about what you need from them.

• Hold a practice at the middle school. Let the younger athletes see what a high school practice is really like—the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The impact of a middle school coach reaches far beyond the school hallway or the echoes of the gym. It’s a lifetime impact. Middle school coaches often don’t receive the respect they deserve. Many work year-round, coach sports they had to learn from YouTube with athletes who may have never played a sport in their entire lives. Let’s all work together to increase the impact of middle school coaches and give them the recognition they’ve earned.